i knew i was gay when

i played butterfly soup today and i enjoyed everything about it!!! i laughed a whole lot and felt really good (and gay) throughout the story. 10/10 would recommend

i know that when i first began my transition and i was being slutty on craigslist i never advertised myself as a woman. i was open about being trans but i posted exclusively in the m4m shit

so like. when i see trans men on HER, am i a little annoyed? sure. but i also completely understand the position they are in.

when you are trans the dating scene is fucking weird. when i was early in my transition i knew that cis women weren’t gonna want me, i knew no other trans women, but i Did know that gay dudes would be into me. that wasn’t an ideal situation for me but it was what i had.

idk. approach the situation with some degree of empathy please. it’s not hard

cookie-cake93  asked:

I want to thank you for clearing up the asexuals can have a sex drive up for me. Actuality you and your blog is what introduced me to different sexual orientations (all I really knew of before was people could be straight, gay or bi) I didn't know about the other terms. Your blog also introduced me to the different gender identities. Anyways what I'm trying to say is I never knew there was a term for someone who doesn't feel sexual attraction and it felt great to know that there's others like me

im really glad that you were able to find a term that you relate to! thats what i want when i try to explain these things, that people will underatand more about themselves and can explore themselves safely.

3

I remember my first time sucking cock i knew right then that thats where i belong and thats where im comfortable… when i had a gf i would still dress up and fantasize about men and the more i did i eventually couldnt even get hard for her…she would get so mad and probably had suspicion that i was gay… she cheated on me sooo many times because i couldnt fuck her for more than two minutes i used to feel bad about it but then it became funny…. sorryyyy girl your boyfriend is a lowkey faggot😇 and years later im no longer the bf in a relationship im the girl the bitch the inferior one. And i LOVE it!!!

Rick Riordan won a Stonewall award today

for his second Magnus Chase book, due to the inclusion of the character Alex Fierro who is gender fluid. This was the speech he gave, and it really distills why I love this author and his works so much, and why I will always recommend his works to anyone and everyone.

“Thank you for inviting me here today. As I told the Stonewall Award Committee, this is an honor both humbling and unexpected.

So, what is an old cis straight white male doing up here? Where did I get the nerve to write Alex Fierro, a transgender, gender fluid child of Loki in The Hammer of Thor, and why should I get cookies for that?

These are all fair and valid questions, which I have been asking myself a lot.

I think, to support young LGBTQ readers, the most important thing publishing can do is to publish and promote more stories by LGBTQ authors, authentic experiences by authentic voices. We have to keep pushing for this. The Stonewall committee’s work is a critical part of that effort. I can only accept the Stonewall Award in the sense that I accept a call to action – firstly, to do more myself to read and promote books by LGBTQ authors.

But also, it’s a call to do better in my own writing. As one of my genderqueer readers told me recently, “Hey, thanks for Alex. You didn’t do a terrible job!” I thought: Yes! Not doing a terrible job was my goal!

As important as it is to offer authentic voices and empower authors and role models from within LGBTQ community, it’s is also important that LGBTQ kids see themselves reflected and valued in the larger world of mass media, including my books. I know this because my non-heteronormative readers tell me so. They actively lobby to see characters like themselves in my books. They like the universe I’ve created. They want to be part of it. They deserve that opportunity. It’s important that I, as a mainstream author, say, “I see you. You matter. Your life experience may not be like mine, but it is no less valid and no less real. I will do whatever I can to understand and accurately include you in my stories, in my world. I will not erase you.”

People all over the political spectrum often ask me, “Why can’t you just stay silent on these issues? Just don’t include LGBTQ material and everybody will be happy.” This assumes that silence is the natural neutral position. But silence is not neutral. It’s an active choice. Silence is great when you are listening. Silence is not so great when you are using it to ignore or exclude.

But that’s all macro, ‘big picture’ stuff. Yes, I think the principles are important. Yes, in the abstract, I feel an obligation to write the world as I see it: beautiful because of its variations. Where I can’t draw on personal experience, I listen, I read a lot – in particular I want to credit Beyond Magenta and Gender Outlaws for helping me understand more about the perspective of my character Alex Fierro – and I trust that much of the human experience is universal. You can’t go too far wrong if you use empathy as your lens. But the reason I wrote Alex Fierro, or Nico di Angelo, or any of my characters, is much more personal.

I was a teacher for many years, in public and private school, California and Texas. During those years, I taught all kinds of kids. I want them all to know that I see them. They matter. I write characters to honor my students, and to make up for what I wished I could have done for them in the classroom.

I think about my former student Adrian (a pseudonym), back in the 90s in San Francisco. Adrian used the pronouns he and him, so I will call him that, but I suspect Adrian might have had more freedom and more options as to how he self-identified in school were he growing up today. His peers, his teachers, his family all understood that Adrian was female, despite his birth designation. Since kindergarten, he had self-selected to be among the girls – socially, athletically, academically. He was one of our girls. And although he got support and acceptance at the school, I don’t know that I helped him as much as I could, or that I tried to understand his needs and his journey. At that time in my life, I didn’t have the experience, the vocabulary, or frankly the emotional capacity to have that conversation. When we broke into social skills groups, for instance, boys apart from girls, he came into my group with the boys, I think because he felt it was required, but I feel like I missed the opportunity to sit with him and ask him what he wanted. And to assure him it was okay, whichever choice he made. I learned more from Adrian than I taught him. Twenty years later, Alex Fierro is for Adrian.

I think about Jane (pseudonym), another one of my students who was a straight cis-female with two fantastic moms. Again, for LGBTQ families, San Francisco was a pretty good place to live in the 90s, but as we know, prejudice has no geographical border. You cannot build a wall high enough to keep it out. I know Jane got flack about her family. I did what I could to support her, but I don’t think I did enough. I remember the day Jane’s drama class was happening in my classroom. The teacher was new – our first African American male teacher, which we were all really excited about – and this was only his third week. I was sitting at my desk, grading papers, while the teacher did a free association exercise. One of his examples was ‘fruit – gay.’ I think he did it because he thought it would be funny to middle schoolers. After the class, I asked to see the teacher one on one. I asked him to be aware of what he was saying and how that might be hurtful. I know. Me, a white guy, lecturing this Black teacher about hurtful words. He got defensive and quit, because he said he could not promise to not use that language again. At the time, I felt like I needed to do something, to stand up especially for Jane and her family. But did I make things better handling it as I did? I think I missed an opportunity to open a dialogue about how different people experience hurtful labels. Emmie and Josephine and their daughter Georgina, the family I introduce in The Dark Prophecy, are for Jane.

I think about Amy, and Mark, and Nicholas … All former students who have come out as gay since I taught them in middle school. All have gone on to have successful careers and happy families. When I taught them, I knew they were different. Their struggles were greater, their perspectives more divergent than some of my other students. I tried to provide a safe space for them, to model respect, but in retrospect I don’t think I supported them as well as I could have, or reached out as much as they might have needed. I was too busy preparing lessons on Shakespeare or adjectives, and not focusing enough on my students’ emotional health. Adjectives were a lot easier for me to reconcile than feelings. Would they have felt comfortable coming out earlier than college or high school if they had found more support in middle school? Would they have wanted to? I don’t know. But I don’t think they felt it was a safe option, which leaves me thinking that I did not do enough for them at that critical middle school time. I do not want any kid to feel alone, invisible, misunderstood. Nico di Angelo is for Amy, and Mark and Nicholas.

I am trying to do more. Percy Jackson started as a way to empower kids, in particular my son, who had learning differences. As my platform grew, I felt obliged to use it to empower all kids who are struggling through middle school for whatever reason. I don’t always do enough. I don’t always get it right. Good intentions are wonderful things, but at the end of a manuscript, the text has to stand on its own. What I meant ceases to matter. Kids just see what I wrote. But I have to keep trying. My kids are counting on me.

So thank you, above all, to my former students who taught me. Alex Fierro is for you.

To you, I pledge myself to do better – to apologize when I screw up, to learn from my mistakes, to be there for LGBTQ youth and make sure they know that in my books, they are included. They matter. I am going to stop talking now, but I promise you I won’t stop listening.”

queerty.com
Blind people reveal how they knew they were gay
You often hear about "love at first sight." But what is that experience like for people who can't see?
By Graham Gremore

Reddit users wondered how blind people (especially those blind from birth) would understand their sexuality or identify as LGBTQ – how could they be attracted to individuals whom they cannot see?

Users who were blind came across the question and supplied the answer:

“When I meet someone, what I go by is their voice, their smell, their kindness, and their willingness to help me when needed,” said one.

They largely agreed on voice being a key attribute.

It’s about the feeling, they described, the butterflies they’d feel in their stomach when touching someone of their preferred gender – or even just being close to them, to that tangible sort of energy – eliciting involuntary reactions not experienced when with the other gender. 

Our connections to each other are so complex and multifaceted and ingrained that of course it extends beyond one specific human sense. And understanding this depth is an important step in recognizing that the LGBTQ experience is one that’s full, rewarding, and, truly, love.

Please take a few minutes of your time to read this. I’m not asking for anything. I just think that this is something that isn’t said enough.

My mom is extremely homophobic and recently, she found out that I’m gay. I didn’t tell her. My brother was talking to my mom and let it slip. And if I was not ready to tell her, I was definitely not ready for the backlash of her knowing.
I was taking a nap when my mom found out. The moment my brother let it slip, he tried to take it back but it was too late. They started arguing and it woke me up. I couldn’t really hear what they were saying and looking back at it now, I’m glad I couldn’t. I later found out that my brother was trying to explain to my mom that nothing was wrong with me for liking girls. That my happiness was all that mattered. But my mom wouldn’t listen to a word he said. So my brother begged her not to say anything to me. Not until I told her myself. And she didn’t.

I could feel the tension during dinner but I didn’t bring it up until later that night. While I was getting ready to go to bed, my mom started asking me questions about boys. What kind of boys I like and stuff like that. Instead of answering the question, I changed the subject and asked about the argument. Her expression immediately changed from lighthearted to somber. In that instant, I knew I would regret asking. She looked me straight in the eye and asked me if I liked girls. The moment I registered what she was asking, I froze. I just stood there, staring at her. Tears began streaming down my face because I knew what was coming. And I wasn’t ready for it.

I never answered her question but my reaction was all she needed for confirmation. She became hysterical. She began saying things that I mostly blocked out because they hurt too much. I tried to tell her that it wasn’t a choice, that I didn’t choose to be gay and she told me that I needed to change my thought process because my father was going to be ashamed of me. My father died of brain cancer when I was four and I always feared what he would think of me if he was still alive today. Hearing my mom say that hurt like hell. I broke down and my brother tried to comfort me but I cried myself to sleep that night.

The next day, my mom acted like she didn’t just tear my heart out. She pretended like it didn’t happen and avoided making eye contact with me for a week. Now, we’re sort of back to normal but our relationship is strained. She’s in denial, always making passing remarks about homosexuals, and it will never go back to being the same after that.

Thank you for reading this. When I told my friends what happened, they told me that it was bound to happen eventually and that it was better my mom found out now. But they didn’t understand the feeling of having your mom tell you that she would rather die than have a gay child. Let me tell you, it was the worst feeling I have ever experienced in my 17 years of life.

If you know anyone who identifies on the lgbt+ spectrum, please don’t out them. Even if they stole your crayon when you were in Kindergarten and you haven’t liked them since, don’t out them. I had it better than most people. I know children who have been kicked out of their homes for being different. So don’t out anyone. Don’t bash anyone for being in the closet. You don’t know their situation. When they’re ready, they will work things out on their own.

100 Dialogue Prompts: Part 4

It’s amazing to see how much we can create together, my amigos. Here’s part 4.

  1. “Look, I might be evil but even I have standards.”
  2. “Do your parents know you’re dating Death?” “No, I promised we wouldn’t get back together after he broke up with me the first time.”
  3. “Wait why am I naked and covered in cheese?”
  4. “Good god, that cake is fuckin stale and dry mate!!” “Just like how you are recently? Gee, thanks.”
  5. "There is always time for a high-five.”
  6. “Karen, what would ever posses you to find me here.”
  7. “Oh my god, put that man down! Come on, let’s go get you some REAL food.”
  8. “A demonic sugar glider?”
  9. “People always say they never thought they would be here but I absolutely did.”
  10. “And I thought I was a bit weird. But you! You are insane!”
  11. “So your hair knows kung-fu? Ha, that’s nothing! MY hair knows HAIR-ATE!” (You know, as in karate) (This used to be an insider between me and a friend…)
  12. “One day, darling, you and I are going to conquer the Universe not just our world.”
  13. “Did you seriously think they wouldn’t notice when their humans went missing?!”
  14. “Well, maybe next time you should consider that not everyone wants to be woken up at four in the morning by a- what IS that, anyway?!”
  15. “Now, how exactly did your foot get stuck in the barrel?”
  16. “I hope you realize what you’re doing. This forest never ends, you know that, right?”
  17. “You can’t just kill someone and then make it all better by saying sorry!”
  18. “Why the fuck is my cat levitating?!” “He said he wanted to feel what flying was”
  19. “You’re trying to tell me you killed three men…with a microphone?”
  20. “Hang on, are you a John Wick fan?”
  21. “IT’S TWO IN THE MORNING!” “And?” “ I have a strict no murder rule until eight. Call me then.”
  22. “I did realize you were going to be naked the whole time”
  23. “Ok, I understand you like animals, but you can’t just bring a tiger into the apparent without asking!”
  24. “I…I didn’t want you to find out like this. I’m so sorry.”
  25. “OH MY GOD CATHERINE! I JUST SAW A NARWHAL! I’M TELLING YOU, I SAW A FREAKIN’ WHALE UNICORN!”
  26. “I gotta go, I left my toaster in the oven!
  27. "Why is there a gaggle of fancy buisness men on my front lawn?”
  28. “Can you please stop referring to me as ____! That’s not my name!” “Then what is?” “I don’t know!”
  29. *Sarcastic* “Yeah, sure. I won’t at all mind being your footslave.” “Oh, goody! I knew you’d agree!” “Wait, what?”
  30. “When are you going to give up on this whole ‘evil’ thing?” “When it stops being so much fun!”
  31. “You didnt say to KILL the man!” “WELL I DIDNT SAY NOT TOO”
  32. “Mum, Dad… I’m gay.” “That’s nice, honey, but now is not the right time!”
  33. “Take a look at your soul and consider your life choices! Oh wait, that’s right! You don’t fucking have a soul!” “Oh, god, just go drown in a bathtub of syrup why don’t ya?”
  34. “I kindly ask you to please quit making your heart stop. It’s creeping me out!” “So… Y-You were sleeping in a coffin” “Yeah I’m used to it” “Are you a vampire or what?! How can someone get used to sleep in a coffin?” “No I’m used to sleep I never said that I’m used to sleep in a freaking coffin!”
  35. “Darling I love you, more than I can ever express in words…. But please stop teaching chickens necromancy.”
  36. “I wanted to know why you stole souls, not your melodramatic backstory…”
  37. “I really wish that old white man would stop rubbing his nipples at me”
  38. “You know it is written: Do not summon Satan, right ?”
  39. “Look around, what is this?” “My room?” “No, this is pathetic.”
  40. “I’ve been a professor for 20 years, and yet still my greatest secret hasn’t been revealed–I can’t read.”
  41. “Our souls don’t belong in these 'human’ bodies, every one of us is implanted here from another galaxy, and this has been the case for a thousand years. No one knows what 'actual humans’ are like without us inhabiting them.”
  42. “Did you just create a portal in time and space to pull another version of yourself into this world so I have to deal with another annoying idiot?” “No but thanks for the idea.”
  43. “You’re bleeding?!” “Nah, I’m frolicing in a field of flowers - yes I’m bleeding!”
  44. “Let me get this straight. I tell you that I make a decent omelette and you somehow equate that to qualification for piloting a spaceship?”
  45. “It’s the weekend! Let’s hit the town! See a concert, redo our wardrobes, get high, start a crime ring, I don’t know.”
  46. “Keep running, you’ve only got 4HP!”
  47. “This is clearly your first time. Stop screaming already, you’ll wake the neighbors!”
  48. “Has anyone seen the outdoors?” “What the fuck is an outdoors?”
  49. “Why do I feel like this again, I thought we were done with this?”
  50. “Look, as much as I like to hang out with you, I’ve gotta go and save the earth. Toodles!”
  51. “Have you seen?… oh shit”
  52. “Two questions: one, how many matches do you have, and two, where do you keep your socks?”
  53. “Because fuck surveys, that’s why!”
  54. “Stop yelling out the window or the koalas will rip your face off!”
  55. “I guess when I heard 'Night of Debauchery’… I didn’t picture muffins on your pajamas.”
  56. “Honey, you can’t keep throwing people to the pit of pain and despair just because they don’t like choc mint ice cream.”
  57. “Oh, no honey, put that back…”
  58. “It’s going to be too late, you know. It’s always too late.”
  59. “Hey, so, uh… I’m in trouble…” “What did you do this time?” “I got stranded in Wales….. again…”
  60. “OK, but… how do we get the dog out of a hole in space in time exactly?”
  61. “Aren’t people supposed to grow instead of shrink ?”
  62. “Wait. You’re aroused?” “Why would that surprise you?” “It does on account of you being covered in blood. Wipe that smile off your face. You look like a cat in heat.”
  63. "I pay your taxes”
  64. “No, ____. We did not raise our hamster like this.”
  65. “You can’t run from your own shadow(s), what makes you think you can run from theirs?”
  66. “You adopted… a dog?” “Mate, that’s not a dog.”
  67. “And at this moment, he decided to punch himself in the face.” “Narrator, listen, I know you’ve been with me my whole life, but you’re a huge jerk.”
  68. “Why didn’t you tell me it was a portal BEFORE we ended up here?”
  69. “Is that…the Mona Lisa.” “…Yes…” “What did I say to you about stealing priceless artifacts!?” “…That I had to take you with me next time.” “Exactly!”
  70. “Yes, I agree, magic is pretty cool. But did you really have to use it for THIS?”
  71. “Despite the fact that was epic, you’re still suspended”
  72. “Chill, dad it’s not what you think it is!” “Well it looks like you’re making out with the demon your grandma banished to cellar…WHY IS HE IN YOUR ROOM?”
  73. “If you truly love me you’ll let me-OH FUCKING HELL DID YOU JUST STAB ME!?”
  74. “Spoon”
  75. “What began as a conflict over the transfer of consciousness from flesh to machines escalated into a war which has decimated a Million worlds.The ___ and the ___ have all but exhausted the the resources of a galaxy in their struggle for domination. Both sides, now crippled beyond repair, the remnants of their armies continue to battle on ravaged planets, their hatred fueled by over four thousand years of total war. This is a fight to the death. For each side, the only acceptable outcome is…“
  76. ”… I’m going back to bed. You brought it here, you can deal with the mammoth yourself.“
  77. "Is the food supposed to be moving?”
  78. “You mean to tell me that in the two minutes I was gone,  you bombed a minor country,  got married to a stripper,  and assassinated a world leader?!”
  79. “Is that a unicorn???? EATING MY BEEF JERKY?!”
  80. “Do I get to dream about you again tonight?”
  81. “Well now I have to change clothes AGAIN!”
  82. “All of this was because of a… OF A PLUSHIE?!” “Well…Yeah?” “Great, how are we going to get out of jail now?!”
  83. “So…you gonna tell me why my brother is upside down and why you’re wearing my purple thong?”
  84. “Did you really have to burn down another Cracker Barrel?”
  85. “Sir, that’s impossible, you can’t do that.” “IS THAT A FUCKING CHALLENGE?!?!”
  86. “We need to invade Portugal.” “…Sure, why not?”
  87. “Did you divide by zero?! YOU’RE GOING TO KILL US ALL”
  88. “Stand down, Milady, this is a matter between gentlemen with mustaches.”
  89. “Next time you get arrested I am NOT paying your bail” “That’s a lie and you know it.” “….”
  90. “I thought you were dead.” “So did I”
  91. “John dont flush the dog down the toilet”
  92. “What did I say again about resurrecting dictators??”
  93. “Cucumbers are NOT pets… what do you mean, you ate him??”
  94. “Are you and God seriously fighting right now? And what happened to Satan?”
  95. “Are ferrets supposed to be blue??”
  96. “I’m the protagonist? Well I guess that explains why I look like about a thousand other people.”
  97. “Why do I do this to myself?”
  98. “Stop eating your tortilla chips with ketchup. It’s unattractive.”
  99. “How do you eat an entire cheese wheel in one sitting?”
  100. “Why are God and Satan moving in with us?”

Let’s make one more ‘100 Dialogue Prompts’ list together. Leave a comment with your prompt below. Don’t forget the double quotes “”. And as always, only one prompt per amigo! Also, here is your random Dutch word of the day: pindakaas

i knew i was in for a wild ride on this website when i kept reading posts about how gay bars are outdated sex caves and Problematical for socially anxious queer academics while they’re being gentrified out of existence right before our very own eyes

“I thought I would be disappointing them if they knew I was gay. So I never did anything. When they found out that Garry and I were together, they were so happy. The reaction was so beautiful — strangers commenting, ‘Great for you!’ I’m just so grateful for it.”

Barry Manilow has officially come out as gay, telling People magazine about his marriage to his manager and partner of 40 years, Garry Kief, and how his fans have reacted. Congratulations! (via People)

life information I wish I knew when I was closeted & questioning: 

despite the stereotype of the Mean Gatekeeping Lesbians, like every wlw I know is super excited when one of our friends comes out, even if they’ve been identifying as straight/dating only men for years. Like we love having other folks to talk about girls with, and the overwhelming majority of us are gonna be so proud of you and happy to talk to you about everything. 

I swear when I was younger I was scared to come out to anyone, but I was especially scared to come out to those I perceived as Established Lesbians™ out of a misguided notion that they would interrogate me on my history and every internal doubt and conclude I was a fake and a liar and not a real lesbian and would kick me out of the pride club or something. 

but everyone was super nice and lbpq girls were 100% more friendly and easier to find and befriend after I came out, even tentatively (when I knew I liked girls but couldn’t figure out if I was bi or gay, so wasn’t identifying consistently with any label yet). 

If you’re scared to come out because you’re afraid of being deemed ‘not gay enough,’ I promise that women who love women (including and especially lesbians!!) are so much nicer than you’ve been culturally led to believe. 

Homophobia

“Gay people are worse than paedophiles” - a woman I went to church with when I was 7/8

“You know that’s the gay pride flag you’re drawing, right?” - a classmate seeing me draw a rainbow at age 11 before I knew what gay pride even was

“Ugh that’s gay” - most people around me who went to my schools/college from ages 7-present(17)

“I agree with civil partnerships but I don’t agree with gay marriage because marriage is between a man and a woman to produce children” my religious studies teacher when I was 12

“I don’t have a problem with gay people but why do they need to shove it in my face” - my mum when I was 12

“I don’t mind gay people, it’s bisexuals I have a problem with, just pick, be gay or straight, it’s not a pick and mix” - my mum when I was 12

“Ew you’re a lesbian” - many people around me, joking, even before I came out

“Well I don’t like gay people because of my religion and I think they’re going to hell” - a classmate in my religious studies class when I was 15

“All of these celebrities are just coming out as bisexual for attention” - my mum when I was 15/16

People often wonder why it’s difficult for gay/lesbian/bi kids to come out, this is why, it’s not even outright direct homophobic attacks, it’s offhand comments made by straight people because they think you’re one of them meanwhile feeling trapped inside yourself. When you start questioning your sexuality, you start to remember all of those comments made and it terrifies you because it makes you question who you are and what you’ll become if you ever do come out and it’s horrible

When you’re told these things by parents/family/teachers/ friends you start to believe these things because why would they lie to you? I believed almost all of those things at one point because that’s all I’d been told and it made it 10x harder for me to come to terms with who I was, it meant not even looking at girls for too long in case they thought I wanted them and scoulding myself and getting so angry at myself every time I had any remotely romantic/sexual feelings about a girl, saying things like this make it so much harder for people to accept themselves

I’ve worked so hard for a long time to accept who I am, however I’d be lying if I said I was completely comfortable with what other people think of me, even after I’ve come out, it still terrifies me to talk about sexuality with my family and friends because I’m still scared that on some level they’re not okay with it and I don’t know when this feeling will stop or if it ever will

So yeah, I am loud and over the top about my sexuality but that’s because 1) I’m so proud of how far I’ve come and the the journey I’ve taken to come to where I am today, accepting who I am 2) I’m still trying to convince myself that I am Okay with being out and proud and not caring about what others think 3) if other people hear me being out and proud maybe it will make it easier for them when they think about accepting who they are/coming out because they’ll think about the positives

What I’m trying to say here is, watch what you say especially around younger people who are probably starting to question who they are because what you say can have damaging effects on them and trust me when they start to think about coming out, they will think about every single one of those comments made

There were two women that lived together in our town, and they were accepted by the community. Mom said, “Well, one of them’s got to be the man.” So I realized as a kid that women did that, but there weren’t any men that I knew of. There were two guys, two miles from us, that lived together for years and died together, but as a kid I just passed that off. When Dad needed help at harvest time he told me to go get them, because they didn’t have a car. Everybody said they were brothers, but they didn’t have the same last name.
— 

Harry Beckner

I’m reading a book called Farm Boys: Lives of Gay Men from the Rural Midwest, and this man was born in 1937, so the time period he’s talking about re: his childhood is, at most, the mid 1940s - early 50s. I found this paragraph pretty interesting because it shows that for some people, it wasn’t all death and heartbreak and misery. Some gay women and men were able to live peaceful lives until the end of their days with their partners, even back then, even in a supposedly intolerant environment. It wasn’t always Brokeback Mountain. 

fave beauty and the beast (2017) things

  • the prince’s fabulous make up
  • “if he could earn their love in return”
  • belle’s blue dress
  • “hmm… ‘je ne sais quoi’?” - “I don’t know what that means”
  • even the freaking ducks are singing
  • “it’s never gonna happen ladies”
  • gaston asking belle if she’s busy and belle saying “no”
  • otp gaston x mirrors
  • belle’s disgusted face when gaston gestures from his lower body to her when saying she should only be concerned with her own children
  • “no one can change… that much”
  • “madame gaston, his little wife, uGH
  • the whole scene with maurice in the castle
  • m a u r i c e
  • philippe, everyone’s hero
  • belle smashing lumière with a stool
  • “the east wing, or as I like to call it, the only wing
  • ‘G A S T O N’
  • gaston lifting both lefou and a lady onto his shoulders
  • “I’ve been told I’m clingy, but I really don’t get it”
  • “he’ll blame me!” - “yes I will make sure of it”
  • “maestro, play quietly please” - “oh quietly, sotto voce, of course. are there any other tasteless demands you wish to make upon my artistry”
  • be. our. guest. be our guest put our service to the test
  • maurice trying to remember the way to the castle
  • “you really wanna marry into this family?”
  • “gaston, stop it. breathe. think happy thoughts. go back to the war! blood… explosions… countless widows…”
  • the nose boop
  • luke evans’ acting in that scene… hilariously creepy
  • “romeo and juliette fucking sucks here’s my huge library full of much better things to read” basically
  • beast is making jokes now
  • beast knocking out belle with his huge ass snowball like chill man
  • beast walking around the castle grounds with philippe and talking to him
  • belle watching that from the window and looking beautiful as hell like wow I knew I was gay but that was a solid reminder
  • “no? too touristy?”
  • the way lefou says maurice’s name and smiles when seeing he’s alive
  • waiting heeere. fooor. eee.ver.mooooore
  • luke evans singing
  • “there’s a beast running wild there’s no question, but I fear the wrong monster’s released”
  • stanley rocking that dress and owning it that’s my boy
  • lefou teaming up with mrs potts
  • “I am. not. a beast.”
  • L E F O U 
  • “turn back into a clock, turn back into a clock”
  • human plumette is so beautiful I wanted to cry
  • “how would you feel about growing a beard”
  • rawr

Oh Shit…

It happened gradually…

Sirius: *bursts into the dorm, locking the door behind him*

Sirius: *spots Remus and holds a finger to his lips* Shhh…

It had started with little things. The way he’d put his hair up with his wand, dark curls falling across his forehead. The impressively dramatic eye-rolls. The sound of his voice. His crooked smile…    

Then it became more specific.

The way his voice would crack when he tried to hit the high notes in “Stayin’ Alive”. The way he’d always tilt Remus’ book down, peering over it with a mischievous look that said very clearly he was up to no good. How he passed every test effortlessly, infuriatingly, playing it off as “luck”. The way his shoulders hunched and his expression turned stony every time he passed Regulus in the hall, desperately trying to think of something to say to his estranged sibling. The way his whole face would light up whenever James introduced him as his brother. The way he’d sit quietly in the hospital wing after the full moon, dark bags under his eyes. The fact that he always took notes when he knew Remus wouldn’t be able to make it…  

Sirius: *sighs with relief when no one knocks on the door* *turns to Remus* Hey Moons, If anyone comes asking where I am… tell them I’m off snogging McKinnon or something.

The fact that it hurt when he said that…

Sirius: *notices the way Remus’ hands are trembling as he turns the page, his eyes staring blankly at the same spot*  

He didn’t know when it had happened… what had changed…

But…

Oh shit… 

… I’m gay. 

“Mario and I had been friends since the age of six. We were from the same small town in the countryside. We always kept in touch. We’d occasionally get coffee together. I knew he was gay but we never talked about it. It just didn’t come up. He never volunteered the information and I never asked. I felt that I was being respectful. At one point, I began to notice that his face was changing. He started to get very thin. But I never asked about it. Maybe I thought that he’d feel I was invading his privacy. Mario could get offended very easily. He was like a volcano. Maybe, subconsciously, I just didn’t want to get involved. When I finally knew for sure, it was too late. I visited him at the hospital the day before he died. I could only look at him through a glass window. He was covered in blankets. I felt like such an idiot. I could have asked him at any time. I could have said: ‘What are you hiding from me? Are you sick? Are you afraid I will reject you?’ Then we could have hugged each other and cried together. We could have maybe even laughed at the situation. But we never got to do that. Because I never had the balls to ask.”

(Buenos Aires, Argentina)

The Most Important Story

I came out to my parents when they discovered gay porn on my computer while I was at my friend Nicole’s house choreographing a hip hop dance.

I was shocked because I thought they already knew but, I got a call when I was like, mid shoulder-brush, from my mother being like, “Where are you?” and I was like “I’m at Nicole’s house!” and she was like, “You need to come home now.” And I went home.

I can’t believe i’m telling this story.

Anyway, I went home after we finished the dance.

She drove me home in her Infiniti SUV and I walked into the house and it’s pitch black, and I just see the like back-lit shadow of my mother in the corner of the kitchen just like…

She brings me down and rather than having a nice “let’s talk about this”, she starts like bringing up, she starts like opening up all the websites and I don’t know what to do and I’m like: “Ew what is that? That’s disgusting!”

Meanwhile I’m like: “Yep Tuesday, yep Wednesday, Thursday I didn’t do anything, and Friday.”

And like my dad comes downstairs in his tighty-whiteys and is like “Bran, If it’s yours, just tell us.”

Well, hold on, hold on.

They found this like weird fax, like a document nobody recognized and I was like:

“Well, obviously someone hacked into our computer!”

And they believed me.