i knew he was gonna do that

possessedbytheskiess  asked:

NONNIEEEEEEE, I mean, THAT SONGGG girl, it's too much. You are making me almost cry already, like I'm so weak for your writing and I can imagine so much just by this?? But you can do it baby <3 be strong, it's gonna be great, we all gonna be strong too when you post it and will be a big old crying mess but hey, it's worth it. Good luck to my baby Saeyoung :( <3

Awww honey! I know! That song gets me every time- has for years! 
So when I knew I was going to write this series I knew that that song was perfect for Saeyoung and what he would go through, just like “A little fall of rain” would work best for Zen. 
I’m not even close to writing the hard part for this story and my heart already hurts- we can be strong together @possessedbytheskiess! I hope you enjoy the story honey, when I finally finish it that is!

Originally posted by vierverloren

*whispers* guess whose favorite asshole just officially became a main character !!!!

3

Snow, Sand AND Sea - Seokjin Shreds it All

4

I’m committed to Flint. I’m committed to Madi. I know what Billy’s done, what should be unforgivable, and yet till so very recently, there’s no one in the world I called a closer friend. The more he talks, the more I remember why. To turn on him now, to have him killed– which is what it would take to side with Flint… seems like something I don’t know I have it in me to do.

self-control (part 1) - steve harrington

Steve Harrington x Reader

Warnings: Angst, some light cursing.

Summary: You’re in charge of homecoming but you don’t have a date.

A/N: OK, honestly I’m so proud of this you guys. It was like ten pages on a google docs. I hope you like it. I know a lot of people want a part 2 to twist of fate, and that will most likely happen pretty soon! But I want to do this as a series as well so we’ll see. Anyway, hope you all like it. I love the feedback, by the way, so tell me what you think!

Gif is not mine, belongs to the owner.

Originally posted by nwetss

The sound of the phone ringing woke you up. Startled, you ran a hand through your hair and looked around before registering where you were. Home. In bed. Things were normal again, right?

Wrong. It was two a.m and the phone was ringing. Why did your parents agree to get you your own line? You quickly flicked on your bedside lamp and then picked up the receiver. “Hello?” You mumbled barely coherently, slowly sitting up in bed.

“Y/N?” It was Steve. You could tell by the way he pronounced your name. Just slightly different than everyone else did. Like it had more meaning coming from his mouth.

You let out a long yawn. “Yeah, Steve. It’s me. What’s going on? Why are you calling me at-“ you glanced over at the clock on your night stand. “Two thirteen in the morning?”

“I haven’t been able to sleep at all,” he said, and you could hear the tiredness in his voice, all groggy and deeper than usual. “Let me apologize. Let me make it up to you. I fucked up, okay-“

“Fucked up is putting it lightly,” you cut him off, your words sharp like daggers. “I don’t want to talk to you about it. Especially not now.”

Steve sighed on the other line. You could almost picture him running a hand through his hair. You hated that you knew him that well. “Go to sleep, Harrington,” You said, and didn’t wait for a response before hanging up the phone.

You tried to go back to sleep but your mind kept drifting back to a few days ago, when everything starting going to shit.

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VLD S4 in a nutshell:

-That’s fuckin Keith.

- bITCHES WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TELLING ME KEITH ISNT GONNA BE IN THE MAJORITY OF THE SEASON

-OH FUCK PIDGE IS CRYIN. NOW IM CRYING. NO SHIT FUCK.

-oH HOLD UP WAIT UP BITCHES

-MATT IS FUCKIN HOT, HE’S A DAMN FLIRT, AND HE’S MOVING IN ON LANCE’S GIRL. I LOVE HIM. I KNEW HE WOULD BE GREAT.

-OH SHIT HOLT SIBLINGS FUCKIN SHIT UP WITH SCIENCE

- NARTI BBY nO. HAGGAR YOU FUCKING PRICK

-lANCE WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT ROPE.

- this episode is making fun of the fandom I can physically feel the executives laughing at us

- wAIT WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE FANON BITCHES.

-oH SHIT ITS TIME FOR THE EMPIRE TO CRUMBLE

-oH SHIT NO ACXA WHAT ARE YOU DOING

- wAIT WHAT THE FUCK LOTOR WHAT IS HAPPENING TO YOUR ARMS

-oHFUCK I WAS WRONG EVERYONE’S DEAD

-sHIT WE’VE BEEN BLIND ALL ALONG. INSTEAD OF LANCE, KEITH IS ABOUT TO FUCKIN PULL AN ULAZ

-MY BOI LOTOR JUST SAVED KEITH’S ASS AND JOINED THE VOLTRON COALITION WHAT THE FUCK


In conclusion:

What the fuck

hey uhh not to be fucking emo but like….do you think when keith & lance had that Talk in s3 keith already knew he was gonna leave? cuz like i’ve seen a lot of people point out that at that point keith’s room was still totally bare, like he was trying not to get attached & was ready to take off at any moment. do you think when he said “things will work themselves out” and implied there would still be a spot for lance on the team, he was talking about himself leaving….haha……

We’ll see that, sweetheart - Dean Winchester x Reader

Title: We’ll see that, sweetheart

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Warnings: None

Imagine: Imagine Dean and you being hunting partners and in love with each other for year, but are too scared to admit it. You are close and have a strong bond, being intimate in different ways every time. When he sees you interact with Jack and take care of him he remembers how he’s always wanted to have kids with you and finally gets the courage to bring it up to you.

A/N: In a close to perfect Supernatural universe this is how I’d like to see Dean open up to Jack, just to get over a lil bit of the pain in the previous episode! But I love both so much that the writers are only making it harder for me now!

“And that is how you can also raise the volume if you want to hear more clear, but careful with that around here cause Dean’s always a grumpy old man with these stuff.” you said playfully and Jack grinned slightly, just as Dean looked at you and scoffed.

“I’m not old.” hemuttered and you hummed.

“Sure, whatever you say grandpa!” you winked but he just shook his head, a small smile creeping on his lips “And- no, Jack he’s not my granpa. It’s just a thing, I call him stupid nicknames sometimes. That’s all.” you said, noticing how the nephilim was ready to ask.

“Oh” he nodded his head “Alright, and if I want to watch… cartoons, I press on number one and then three. For… thirteen, right?”

“Exactly! And there’re plenty of Scooby Doo there for you too!” you giggled, patting his back as he broke into an adorable grin.

“I really like that one, it’s wonderful!” he breathed out, his eyes sparkling.

“It sure is, Jack.” you chuckled “But remember, whenever there isn’t something good on TV and you really want to do something you can opt for a book!”

“Yeah if you wanna be a nerd in life sure.” Dean mumbled and you shot him a look.

“There are plenty of good ones around here, and I have a lot I think you’d like.” you said softly to Jack “Just until you find what you really like and what not we keep exploring, alright?”

“Then I think we should name you Dora.” Dean muttered with a snicker and you couldn’t fight the grin that spread on your lips, as Jack merely tilted his head to the side and frown.

“Do- Dora? What is that?” he mumbled and you still couldn’t fight the laughter that left your lips.

“Dean!” you exclaimed, throwing a pillow at him as he dodged it “How the hell do you even know about that?!” you shook your head.

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» wet. | s

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader (ft. Park Jimin)
Genre: Smut
Words: 2k
Summary: Your cousin, Jimin, pool party was in full effect and you looked to see that Jungkook wasn’t in his swimwear, so what do you do? Push him in the pool. And he’s pissed. It doesn’t help that he’d been craving you all day, seeing as you’ve been walking around in nothing but, a bikini but this was the final straw. 
Warning(s): Light Spanking, Mild Cussing, Explicit Sexual Content 

{cred: 7bboys for the gif}

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2

WOW this came out dark

So like… as soon as I watched this fucking episode I knew I was going to be painting it. That fucking lil smile he does.

Feels good to paint stranger things. I have thought of/talked of/watched nothing else since it came out :)

AMERICAN GODS SENTENCE STARTERS

episode six - a murder of gods.

  • ❝ you saved me. thank you. ❞
  • ❝ you already know my name. ❞
  • ❝ what are they ?
  • ❝ oh motherfucker, you never just answer a fucking question
  • ❝ that’s not a question, ___ , a question would be: what do you believe you saw ?
  • ❝ i don’t know what i believe. ❞
  • ❝ it was a warning to me, and a sacrifice to them. ❞
  • ❝ sacrifice ? like –– like what, for –– for a god ?
  • ❝ what’s a god ? can we even know they exist ? people believe things, which means they’re real. that means we know they exist. so what came first ? gods ? or the people who believed in them ?
  • ❝ where was all this before i met you ?
  • ❝ there’s always a window. but people are frightened to look through it. it’s safer in the prison cell. ❞
  • ❝ we’re not safe now. ❞
  • ❝ who are you ?
  • ❝ i believe in some things. ❞
  • ❝ your wife obviously has a temper. not used to getting her way, huh
  • ❝ your dearly departed has departed and i suggest we should do the same. ❞
  • ❝ was she a ghost ? i mean, do you think you saw a ghost ?
  • ❝ you know, you’re not questioning any of this. i’m questioning everything right now. ❞
  • ❝ i’m not so young nor so narrow to assume the dead are dead, and there’s no spectrum or spectral in between. in my experience, the dead that aren’t rarely come back without purpose. ❞
  • ❝ her purpose was to let you go, now get in. ❞
  • ❝ now you’ve seen who’s after us, and you know what they’re capable of. you can hang around here if you want, but i’m getting out of here. ❞
  • ❝ fuck ! where the fuck is my car !
  • ❝ yes, it does belong to the dead woman, i am the dead woman. where’s my fucking car
  • ❝ first piece of luck i’ve had in days. ❞
  • ❝ worse things out tonight than you. ❞
  • ❝ isn’t she lovely ?
  • ❝ i’ve done the math. this times that equals you’re a cunt, divided by the only way i’m gonna get what i need is if you give it to me equals the only way you’re gonna give it to me is if you don’t need it. ❞
  • ❝ like my friend jesus christ, the only thing you need, ___ , is resurrection. ❞
  • ❝ did you just name drop jesus christ like you know a guy who knows a guy ?
  • ❝ i can be very convincing. ❞
  • ❝ is this you being convincing now ? because you suck at it. ❞
  • ❝ i’m trying to convince you to live. real living. not whatever rot living this is. ❞
  • ❝ why don’t you put that on your fucking scales and weigh it
  • ❝ what the fuck are you ? i mean, what the fuck are any of you, but first, tell me, what the fuck are you ? seriously, what the fuck are you ?!
  • ❝ please stop stealing my cab. ❞
  • ❝ i have been traveling in the direction of mecca for days, looking for a jinn. ❞
  • ❝ i’ll tell you where to find a whole murder of gods, demi and otherwise. every god damned one of them. ❞
  • ❝ i know a charm that can lift grief from a grieving heart. ❞
  • ❝ do you know a charm that can stop bleeding ?
  • ❝ i know a charm that can cure sickness and pain and a charm that can turn away the weapons of enemies. i know a charm that can heal with a touch. ❞
  • ❝ excuse the cold hands. ❞
  • ❝ there’s always been a god shaped hole in man’s head. trees were the first to fill it. ❞
  • ❝ mr. wood was the trees, mr. wood was the forest. see, he was a very old god who saw something very new. he saw a god fearing society turn towards complete industrialization. so what did he do ? he sacrificed his trees, he sacrificed his forest, and he became something else. ❞
  • ❝ well, at this stage it’s ‘we’ll see’, or, ‘time will tell’, but if it’ll rest your weary head, then yeah, it’s gone. ❞
  • ❝ religion inspires in those who fear nothing, fear of the gods, and using that fear requires a certain element of fucked up. ❞
  • ❝ i’m not scared of anything anymore. ❞
  • ❝ i’m scared you’re never gonna shut that flapping hole of yours. i’m sitting here having a fucking anxiety attack because i am genuinely terrified that you are never gonna shut the fuck up. ❞
  • ❝ did you kill ___ ? i won’t tell. ❞
  • ❝ my name is ___. or … it was ___. i do not know what my name is now. ❞
  • ❝ i just realized that i’m never gonna see my mother again. i’m never gonna hear her say my name again. i’m never gonna eat her cooking again. ❞
  • ❝ are you dead ?
  • ❝ this is my afterlife, ___. ❞
  • ❝ did you pray for another life
  • ❝ i do not pray to ask god for things. i pray to thank god, for bringing me where i am. to this time, to this place, where i finally know what i must do in this life. ❞
  • ❝ i pray i find ___. he is my afterlife. i knew him. we knew each other. and now i wish to know more. ❞
  • ❝ people will defend the warm safe feeling their america gives them. they will defend it with bullets. ❞
  • ❝ less a funeral than a celebration of a sacrifice. ❞
  • ❝ if i know my friend, somebody got tossed into the volcano. ❞
  • ❝ this was a human sacrifice ❞ 
  • ❝ that’s him. head of the crowd. the one they flock to. ❞
  • ❝ please, go in peace. ❞
  • ❝ what rock did you crawl out from under ?
  • ❝ playing a little hide and seek. hiding from the proverbial them, and seeking … you. ❞
  • ❝ i need you to believe in me. ❞
  • ❝ i’ve heard your name on the wind. ❞
  • ❝ we’re at war already, and we’re losing. you, me, all of us. they’re taking honey from our mouths. ❞
  • ❝ i have no use for shame. ❞
  • ❝ it’s easier to pass for the living in the dark, if i felt the need to pass. ❞
  • ❝ your heart’s not beating for this life anymore, ___. this life is done. ❞
  • ❝ that doesn’t obligate him to feel shit. ❞
  • ❝ perhaps i misjudged the kiss. ❞
  • ❝ death do us part, take the fucking hint. he’s gone. your man came, saw you, tasted death on your tongue, and he fucking left. ❞
  • ❝ your kind of love, ___, is the worst kind of love of them all. you can love somebody even when you know they don’t like it. even when you know they don’t want it. ❞
  • ❝ that’s some profound fucking knowledge for you right there, wrapped up in a quaint sexual metaphor. ❞
  • ❝ people do tend to behave if they know they’re being watched. they like being watched. ❞
  • ❝ somebody’s watching. somebody’s always watching. ❞
  • ❝ what did you do to become the god of this little universe that you’ve created ?
  • ❝ you’re no stranger to sacrifice. ❞
  • ❝ they don’t sacrifice anymore. not to me. ❞
  • ❝ you could always sacrifice yourself. you’ve done it before. ❞
  • ❝ you ever see a man hanged, ___ ? throat crushed, gasping for life. it’s a terrible way to find your faith. faith doesn’t have to leave the faithful dangling. ❞
  • ❝ you are what you worship. ❞
  • ❝ the power of fire is firepower. ❞
  • ❝ not god, but godlike. and they believe. ❞
  • ❝ god bless the believers. ❞
  • ❝ i’ll make you a blade worthy of a god. ❞
  • ❝ i know who he is, and who he’s always been. i can depend on that. ❞
  • ❝ you’re not here at the moment. you’re distracted. i wonder why. ❞
  • ❝ she’s out in the cold, but … she doesn’t feel it anymore. or maybe … maybe it’s all she feels, now. ❞
  • ❝ they make blood sacrifices to you. ❞
  • ❝ you could use a blood sacrifice. ❞
  • ❝ you sold us out. ❞
  • ❝ you saw what i was. i was a story people forgot to remember to tell. and they gave me a gun. they put power back in my hands. and i gotta tell you; it feels good. ❞
  • ❝ i never needed my religion to be moral. ❞
  • ❝ moralizing religions are materialistic ones. they all need their martyrs. ❞
  • ❝ i’m laying down a curse. i’m cursing the whole fucking thing. ❞
  • ❝ god is great. ❞
  • ❝ life is great. ❞
It’s a Long Way Down

“I-I’m not over it, Dean. Of course not,” Sam whispered in an attempt to calm Dean’s increasingly rising voice. That didn’t help the threat of Dean’s throat closing in tears, however.

“No, no, of course, you’re not over it,” He deflected. “You’re throwing it into this kid and projecting yourself onto him because you’re zeroed in on getting Mom’s body back! Meanwhile, I’m––” Dean stopped, a motion in the background catching his attention. 

It was a pencil, one of Sam’s that he uses to write in the books because they don’t destroy the letters so much. It simply floated in the air, no supports or strings holding it up.

“I’m…” Dean trailed off as the pencil began to move towards the opening that led to the hallway. Sam and he alike turned in tandem to the pencil until it turned the corner and stopped in plain sight, Jack emerging just ahead of the pencil, his eyes glowing.

“Shit,” Sam cursed. “You heard Dean.”

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Strip It Down

A Bucky Barnes AU

Character Pairing: Stripper!Bucky Barnes x Female Stripper!Reader

Word Count: 1,992 (whew, barely made it)

Warnings: NSFW 18+ Smut, male and female stripping, strip club scenes, sexual situations/penetration, dirty dancing, language. 

A/N: This is my submission for @bucky-plums-barnes 8,000 Follower Writing Challenge! Gen is amazing and deserves all the love in the world! 

I enjoyed writing Strip It Down WAY too much… I want to continue this…

Prompt: #26. “Well, my normal fee is $500, but seeing that it’s for you, I’m going to need it in advance.” 

The crowd loved Bucky.

Both the men and the women.

You didn’t blame them though. He owned that stage. His last set of the night was always his money maker.

Standing off to the side of the stage you peeked over the edge of the curtain at the screaming women that were vying for his attention. The sea of green bills that pooled around his feet was enough to pay your monthly rent… twice.

The low bass vibrated through the floors as Bucky shed the last piece clothing that was ethically possible. The screams, catcalls and hollers from the crowd drowned out the words to the song. You clutched your robe tighter to your body as you watched him move.

He moved like sex.

He crouched down on his hands and knees, prowling across the stage like a wolf. His hair was falling out of the bun at the back of his head, the loose tendrils framing his face. His back muscles bunched and stretched with each movement. He stopped and pumped his hips in time to the beat. God, to be underneath him and feel those powerful strokes.

Scanning the crowd again, you knew you weren’t the only one in the house tonight thinking that exact same thing.

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southern hospitality

bitty has outgrown this place, and the people in it.

tw: homophobic language/slurs

word count: 1800

for @stitchedopen, 3rd place winner in my fic giveaway! i hope you like it!


The clinking of Jack’s fork against his plate as he sets it down is very unnerving. It’s not the only sound in the room but it’s by far the loudest, to him at least. Even louder than Suzanne’s pleasant babbling (no wonder where Bitty gets it from) and the gentle lull of music being played on a radio somewhere in another room. Probably the kitchen, where Bitty’s finishing up supper.

There’s a shuffling around the corner and Coach becomes visible as he nears the bottom of the staircase. “Jack,” he mumbles gruffly in greeting, giving him a nod and sitting at the head of the table.

“Hello, Mr. Bittle,” Jack replies, smiling a little. “How’s the season going? Still the reigning champs of Morgan County?” If there’s one thing Jack knows he can get Coach to talk about, it’s football. It might be a much different sport than hockey, Jack surmises, but the passion they share for their sports is more than enough for them to hold a conversation.

“Oh, they lost their first game of the season last week. Nevin’s got an injury and we had to switch around the lineups– you remember, Nevin, receiver, curly hair, he’s in the team picture in the living room– anyway, I’m sure it hurt their chemistry.” Coach would talk strategy with Jack for hours, if it was up to him, but Eric is coming into the dining room now. He’s got on yellow oven mitts with tiny white flowers, and he’s holding a tray with a roast and some vegetables.

“The meat’s a little dry, Lord help me, I should stick to baking,” Eric laughs, setting the tray down on the table. “But all the vegetables should be good and I’ve got some pumpkin muffins with a fantastic cream cheese frosting waiting for us in the kitchen.” Everyone starts to serve themselves. The meat’s not dry at all, but Jack keeps that to himself. Sometimes Bitty needs little things to dwell on, to keep himself busy so he’s not worrying so much about the big stuff. Jack knows that.

“So,” Suzanne starts after a minute, and Jack can tell that this is going to be a long one. He glances up at her, a signal that he’s listening. “The Gardeners are having a potluck this Friday, and they sent us an invitation.”

Bitty nearly drops his fork. “The Gardeners?” he hisses. “As in, Melissa and Kyle?”

“Those Gardeners,” Suzanne replies smugly. Jack and Coach exchange a look, humor gleaming in both of their eyes. The drama is about to unfold, they can tell. “What right do they think they’ve got, inviting us to their potluck after what happened at ours?”

Bitty turns to Jack, waving his hands as he speaks. “Two summers ago, we held a potluck here for the neighborhood, and when the Gardeners showed up, Kyle was drunk as a skunk and knocked over our entire dessert table. The whole thing! It was all ruined! And it would have been okay, but they didn’t even bring anything to the potluck in the first place, and they never apologized, and oh, it was such a mess, everyone tried to act like it wasn’t a big deal but darlin’ you should’ve seen the look on Moomaw’s face, I swear she was on the verge of a heart attack.” He shifts abruptly back toward Suzanne. “Mama, we’ve got to go.”

“Oh, I know that, of course we do. Dicky, what you’ve gotta do is bake the best pie those folks have ever tasted, let them know exactly what they were destroying when they had the nerve-”

Jack hums quietly, making a mental note. Potluck on Friday. Prepare for a spectacle.

-

Bitty’s fingers press against Jack’s neck as he helps him straighten his collar. Jack doesn’t really need the help, he supposes, but the contact is welcome, brief but full of warmth, not the kind of affection Jack usually gets when they’re with Bitty’s parents. They’ve been trying really hard, Jack can tell, and Bitty has too. But he understands why Eric sometimes has trouble being soft with Jack around Suzanne and Coach.

“Don’t you just look dashing,” Bitty says with a smile, placing his hand flat on Jack’s chest.

“Only because you picked my outfit,” Jack laughs. Bitty laughs with him, nodding in agreement. He’s got little crinkles at the edges of his eyes when he laughs, and Jack rubs his thumb over them, absent minded.

“You ready, Dicky?” Suzanne calls from the kitchen. The noises of the coffee pot stop and Jack can hear her pouring herself a cup.

“All ready!” Bits yells back. He reaches up his hand and squeezes Jack’s wrist before whirling around into the kitchen. Jack watches Bitty’s hips swing as he leaves, his jeans a little tighter than usual since he’s outgrown some of the clothes that he left here during the school year, and wonders if wore them on purpose.

-

The potluck is bustling. There are people of all ages, from the tiny toddlers playing in the Slip ‘N Slide far left in the back yard to the old ladies knitting underneath the sugar maple next to the house in a comically stereotypical manner. Jack opens Eric’s door for him not out of chivalry but out of necessity– when he emerges from the car, his arms are full of tupperware containers.

“Let me take some, bud” Jack offers, but Bitty shakes his head.

“I’ve got to bring them over myself.”

-

“This one’s cherry with a lattice crust,” Eric is explaining as he removes the lid from the nearest tupperware container. The egregious Melissa Gardener turns out to be a petite brunette with a smattering of freckles across her upturned nose. “And this one’s pumpkin, I know it’s not really the season but I had some materials left over from the muffins I made the other night and I’m sure it’ll be just delightful, I made the whipped cream myself– now, they’re all desserts. I was sure you’d need some.”

Jack stifles a laugh. The bite in Bitty’s voice is unmistakable. “Where should I set them?” Eric asks, still sweet as sugar but with a lilt that suggests this isn’t an innocent question. “This table seems a little… unsteady. I wouldn’t want them to fall, heaven forbid.”

“This table’s fine,” Melissa ensures him, smiling. “Thank you so much for the contributions.”

“It’s nothing at all.”

They burst out laughing as soon as she leaves, Bitty collapsing into Jack’s chest. Jack’s arms come around him automatically and squeeze. “Bits, that was cold.”

“Really? Here I was, thinking I was being so courteous.”

They stay in the embrace for a few more seconds before Bitty shifts away from Jack. It’s subtle, but Jack understands. He squeezes Bitty’s shoulder and then takes a step away. Bitty’s out to everyone who matters, but some people don’t know. And some still have their prejudices.

“Bits, where’s the bathroom?” Jack asks. The noise is already getting to him. He knows he’s got a while of this to go, and he’s sure he’ll be fine, but he just needs a minute to adjust. Eric points him in the right direction, then goes back to arranging the pies on the table.

“Eric!” Bitty whips around. It’s a tall guy with acne scars in a red polo shirt. Bitty looks up, his face ghostly stricken for a second, then paints a big smile on.

“Hey, Todd,” he replies as the guy moves closer. “How have you been.”

“I’ve been fine, thanks,” Todd says. Eric tugs on the bottom of his shirt and glances over at Jack, entering the house. “Who’s the guy?” Todd asks, nodding toward him.

“Jack,” Eric says. “My… my boyfriend.”

Todd smiles. He turns his gaze to Bitty. “I’ve gotta say, Eric, I’m impressed! I expected you to come home with some twinky faggot in a pink H&M scarf.”

Eric inhales sharply. “Go away,” he says quietly, looking at his shoes. “My love life is none of your business.”

“We all knew you were a homo, Bittle, I guess it’s just a little surprising that you’re still showing your face around here. Are you queers ever gonna stop shoving your agenda in our faces? Huh? Go back to Samwell, eh?” He’s inching closer now, and Eric’s cheeks are flaming red.

“Go fuck yourself,” Eric mutters, turning his back. He unstacks a tin of macadamia nut cookies from his lemon meringue, and opens it. His hands are shaking as he spreads them out artfully.

Todd ignores his response, instead reaching over Bitty and sweeping up several cookies. “Don’t mind if I do,” he says as he stuffs one in his mouth. “Mmm,” he replies, smirking. “They’re a little bit… fruity, don’t you think?”

“That’s not even funny,” Eric rolls his eyes. “Get the hell away from me.”

“And if I don’t?”

There’s a hand on the back of Bitty’s neck and he’s flinching, he’s freezing, he can’t move he can’t breathe–

“If you don’t,” Jack whispers, his voice robotic and cold. “I’ll beat the shit out of you, and you can crawl home to your mother and tell her you got your ass handed to you by a faggot. Does that sound like a good enough reason to stop?”

Todd takes a step back. “Don’t you fucking touch me,” he hisses at Jack. “You’re not from around here, are you? You don’t know who my dad is, do you?”

“Let me guess. Mayor of some town I’ve never heard of? Principal of the local high school? Do you know who my father is, noune?” Jack puffs up his shoulders. “Because I can guaran-fucking-tee that my dad is a hell of a lot worse to mess with than yours. So you might just wanna step off.”

“Whatever. I shouldn’t be talking to y’all anyway. Just in case it’s contagious, you know?” Todd smirks.

“I’m going to fucking kill you,” Jack says, still matter of fact, balling his fists and lunging toward Todd. Todd flinches, but the blow doesn’t come. Bitty’s caught the back of Jack’s t-shirt in his hand.

“Jack, honey, it’s okay. I can handle it.”

Todd laughs.

“But this– this asshole–”

“Trust me, sweetpea, I’ve got this.” Eric smiles.

“Yeah, you’re sure gonna take care of me, Bittle, what can you weigh, a hundred and ten? I bet you couldn’t even–”

Splat.

“Pity,” Eric says sweetly as the pie tin slides down Todd’s face, then down his shirt, coating him in cherry filling. “That lattice crust was gorgeous.”

“You– you–” Todd splutters, wiping cherry crud out of his eyes, but Bitty and Jack are already walking away.

“Enjoy the snacks, Melissa,” Eric calls over his shoulder as they make their way to the car. “We’re gonna head out.”