i kind of want to do this idea properly

“Okay, so you kind of just tilt your head, and just move your lips this way-no, stop. You’re using too much tongue again.” Sigh. This guy really was inexperienced.

Mo Guan Shan blushed, his eyebrows drawn in frustration. “Never mind, this is too fucking weird. I’m leaving.”

Jian Yi looked unimpressed. “This was your idea,” he said, crossing his arms. “Now do you want to learn to kiss properly or what?”

Mo Guan Shan was torn. On one hand, he’d been stuck in this stuffy closet for the good part of fifteen minutes with Yian Yi, with practically no improvement. On the other hand, he really wanted impress He Tian.

“Okay. Just one more.”

“Don’t half-ass it this time,” Said Jian Yi. “Pretend I’m him, if it helps,” he added, after a moment of thought.

Just pretend it’s He Tian, thought Mo Guan Shan, closing his eyes. He’s standing right in front of you, dark eyes, jet-black hair, that cute little smirk that just makes you melt. This is for him.

He reached out and gently guided Jian Yi’s lips to his own, moving them slowly, softly. He added some tongue here and there, running it on the back of his teeth. He could tell by the way the blond-haired boy’s breath hitched that he was surprised by his sudden improvement in skill.

They were interrupted when the door burst open, Mo Guan Shan’s boyfriend on the other side.

He was out of breath. “Hey, I was looking for you, I need your help on my cooking project. Someone said they saw you going in here so I…”

He trailed of when he saw what Mo Guan Shan and Yian Yi were doing. His expression paled and then became bright red, an eyebrow cocked in confusion. His fists clenched, unclenched, and clenched again. He became very stiff.

“This isn’t what it looks like!” Said Mo Guan Shan, afraid to move. He Tian didn’t reply. His silence made Mo Guan Shan even more nervous.

A second passed.

“I was just-I was-I wanted to impress you with,” Mo stuttered not knowing what to say. He was beginning to shake.

A minute passed. More silence.

Panicking. “Just say something! Please I didn’t mean to-“ Jian Yi cut him off.

He looked incredulously at He Tian. “Are you hard!?”

His expression was impossible to read, but Mo Guan Shan looked down to confirm that yes, He Tian was extremely hard.

There was an awkward pause.

Jian Yi glanced between them, blushing and uncomfortable. “I think I’ll just excuse myself,” he said, leaving, shutting the door behind him.

Near future thoughts

So what’s gonna happen now? I mean after tonight it seemed like Serena was finally acknowledging she needed help and Bernie is 100% there for her.

But then this is the synopsis for the next ep:

Serena’s abrasiveness towards Jasmine worries Morven, but Jasmine doesn’t appreciate her interference. Is Serena hard on Jasmine because she feels she has the makings of an excellent doctor, or is there an alternative explanation?

So is she still on a downward spiral? Is this still to do with Jasmine’s involvement with Elinor? Or is she just a really harsh teacher who wants results?

My guess is eventually they will write that Serena is taking some real time off to clear her head properly (while Catherine is performing WTBS) then she’ll return in late spring? I have no idea of the actual timings of her absence.

But I’m just wondering what kind of state she’ll be in until she leaves, she’ll probably still be fragile and grief stricken. I just hope she continues to let Bernie in! 

My heart keeps racing and I just need to tell myself to take a break and focus on work right now. I haven’t been properly focusing on updating this tumblr and I feel shit because I know I can do better. But I want to focus on school for now. Thank you so much for all the great messages and kindness. You have no idea how much I appreciate it all.
I will in the meantime try and come back to drawing.. Because I don’t really want to make posting here an obligation for myself. Just want to keep it real and my own work..

Anyway! Thanks for all the support!!! Stay safe and enjoy the coming spring!!!

C: I cannot change or alter my voice nor do I have the desire to. You cannot sound like a race of people and alienating your Black brothers and sisters because YOU are clinging to the asinine idea that we must all sound the same way.

I never wanted to be White a day in my life; the thought of being attached to the most notorious criminals in the world makes my head turn. My blackness is not defined by lies, racism, and delusions.  

Do you know how many Black people I meet like myself who feel as if they “aren’t Black enough” or the “right kind of Black” because they grew up with the label of “oreo”? It’s trash. Because at the end of the day I don’t “speak properly”; I sound, look, and behave this way because of who I am. Get over it.

Y'all can’t come on here and preach about being “Pro Black” when you don’t even accept that your own people don’t all sound the same.