i keep forgetting that i'm not funny

  • Jackson: *keeps stealing Youngjae's underwear*
  • Youngjae: you know what? I'm done, I'm leaving this dorm bye
  • Jaebum: w-wait what, we literally just got he-
  • Mark: but,,,, how about Coco?
  • Youngjae: DIDNT I SAY I AM LEaving wait that's right there's Coco, forget it, I'm staying
Ti Dom Problems - INTP
  • INTP: *leading something that feels like a particularly pleasant conversation*
  • ENFJ1: You're really insatiable today, huh?
  • INTP: ...
  • INTP: ... what do you mean?
  • ENFJ1: You just ...you have these days when you're like a bird with a metal beak and you just peck and chop and pick everything apart that people say.
  • INTP: ...
  • INTP: ...until it's down to its simplest parts and makes sense?
  • ENFJ1: ...until it's down to its simplest parts and makes sense.
  • INTP: ...
  • INTP: ...
  • INTP: ...
  • INTP: ...oh.
  • ***
  • INTP: *leading something that feels like a particularly pleasant conversation*
  • INFJ: ...wow.
  • INTP: ...huh?
  • INFJ: ...you have these moments when you dig deeper and deeper and completely forget all the rules of a normal human conversation.
  • INTP: Oh, I'm sorry - I was just really into it and -
  • INFJ: No, it's fine. I WANT you to understand. It's just so ...unusual.
  • INTP: ...
  • INTP: ...funny that you say that. ENFJ said something really similar a while ago. Like, how I keep chopping things apart.
  • INFJ: ...
  • INFJ: ...
  • INFJ: ...yeah, at this point it's not really a conversation anymore. It's an interrogation.
  • INTP: ...
  • INTP: ...
  • INTP: ...oh.
Protective Big Brother / Friend Starters
  • Feel free to add more!
  • "Are you sure you can trust him?"
  • "At least tell me when and where they're going to drop you off."
  • "They look kinda shady."
  • "I don't like him."
  • "Look, you're safety is my utmost concern, if they do anything funny, don't hesitate to call me."
  • "Check up with me when you move places or anything that might come up, alright?"
  • "You remember what I told you about these types of people, right?"
  • "I'm not trying to me protective, I just care about you."
  • "Be careful, don't forget to call!"
  • "Don't touch him/her/them!"
  • "Just what do you think you're doing?"
  • "Look, I may fight with my siblings, but once you lay a finger on them, you'll be facing me."
  • "Lay a finger on them, and that finger comes off."
  • "I'm keeping an eye out for you."
  • "They may trust you, but I know people like you who gains their trust before stabbing them in the back."
  • "Give you their love? More like give me your heart before I anything else?"

Gotta get that cookie. BY THE POWER OF TEAMWORK!

Halfway through this, I remembered that RGB wouldn’t be able to reach the top shelf either:

pomrania  asked:

Just imagine the MEMES from Obi-wan (badass and HOT) getting elected, replacing Palpatine (old, ugly, who cares). An incredible amount of androsexual young people start taking an interest in politics....

Ahahaha, I really feel like I need to bring some silly back. It’s been too serious lately. ;)

Anakin likes to think that he’s good at letting his Padawan has privacy. That he’s not snooping or anything. But he’s really starting to wonder what she’s laughing about. What is it on her datapad that makes her choke down giggles time and time again?

He shouldn’t ask. If she wants to tell him, she will. He just needs to be patient.

Keep reading

what i dislike about the signs
  • Aries: you interrupt me too often!! i cant keep up with you, it's like you're never tired. plus you never even listen to me & always do your thing anyway
  • Taurus: you sing better than me & whenever i try to cheer you up by telling a joke you straight up say i'm not even funny :(
  • Gemini: i feel like i can never know the real you. & you forget I exist for 5 months at least then when you're back you act like nothing happened??
  • Cancer: it's like you always expect to be hurt so you protect yourself TOO MUCH & your emotions are so extreme!! (even if you pretend to be ok)
  • Leo: i don't think you notice it but you try to control me a lot and lowkey freak out when i say i don't want to hang out/text back
  • Virgo: you try to do/fix EVERYthing even if i say i don't need help you still text me asking if i need anything
  • Libra: you're too much of a procrastinator & take 3 hours to get ready & then you can never decide where to eat
  • Scorpio: your dark humor is probably too dark. and when you're mad at me all you say is "think of what you did" as i stand there hopelessly thinking for 5 days straight
  • Sagittarius: you're too knowledgeable for your own sake (blurting out random facts all the time) & you literally make a joke out of everything oh my god
  • Capricorn: i could be your best friend and you still wouldnt ask for help with anything at all cause you either don't want to bother me or you feel like you can do everything on your own (still don't know, probably a bit of both)
  • Aquarius: you question my opinions/actions way too often, plus you talk about so many things at the same time its confusing
  • Pisces: you're always apologizing for everything, you keep forgetting rather important things & lose your train of thought mid sentence A LOT
  • //written by a pisces.

anonymous asked:

Mod Yoyo's new name is Mod YeetYah. - UM

Funny story, this one time I had to borrow a glue stick from my physics teacher for a project. He told me if I didn’t bring it back I’d get a detention. It wasn’t that big of a deal, I borrow shit all the time and just keep it and the teachers forget about it.

Anyway, the next week I was in the changing rooms messing around with my friends. I re-discovered the gluestick in my bag and took out, laughed, said “I don’t fucking need this anymore!”, and shouted “YEEEEEET!!!!” And through it out of the window into the garden of a house that neighboured the school.

The next lesson was biology and my teacher said “Anybody that borrowed a glue stick from Mr Toase needs to return it now,”. So I stole one of her gluesticks and gave it to her saying it was the one I borrowed.

I don’t know if you guys found that at all interesting but it is a good reason for the name.

~Mod Yeetyah

B’s Log: IDOLiSH7 Special Interview

The actual first and my last translation from the October issue of B’s Log is the interview with IDOLiSH7! The interview is ended with a small commentary on the set list they used at the concert RESTART POiNTER was first performed at.

You can read other magazine translations here

IDOLiSH7 Live Report: Something in the world you’re in

A spotlight shines on the members.

The intro that springs up dances in your chest.

And then, you could hear the voice you’d been waiting for.

IDOLiSH7′s new song, “RESTART POiNTER”, was revealed at the concert on this day. Nanase Riku (below, Nanase) took up the center. A few months after the sensational news of the center change spread, Nanase has returned.

Keep reading

Llamas With Hats (Episodes 1-5) : Sentence Starters
  • "_______, there is a dead human in our house!"
  • "Oh, hey, how did he get in here?"
  • "Me? Uh, I didn’t do this!"
  • "I’ve never seen him before in my life!"
  • "Why did you kill this person, _______?"
  • "That is…that is my least favorite thing to do."
  • "I do not kill people."
  • "Tell me, _______, exactly what you were doing before I came home."
  • "Go on…"
  • "_______, that KILLS people!"
  • "I stabbed him 37 times in the chest."
  • "Why—why are they missing?"
  • "Where are his hands?"
  • "I—I was hungry. And well, you know, when you crave hands..."
  • "Gimme a break!"
  • "My stomach was making the rumblies."
  • "What is wrong with you?!"
  • "Well, I kill people and I eat hands! That’s—that’s two things!"
  • "You sunk an entire cruise ship, _______!"
  • "That sounds dangerous."
  • "I would think I'd remember something like that."
  • "Uhh, melted gumdrops?"
  • "Well, thank God that the children weren't on board to see it."
  • "You were headbutting children off the ship!"
  • "Then you started making out with the ice sculptures!"
  • "I can't believe what I'm hearing!"
  • "That's the sound of forgiveness."
  • "That's the sound of people drowning _______."
  • "That is what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence."
  • "Well they were, uh, they were taking all the croissant rolls."
  • "I will not apologize for art."
  • "I don't know about you but i'm having a lovely time here."
  • "We're supposed to be on vacation."
  • "He was a traitor and a scoundrel."
  • "i seemed to have swallowed and entire person."
  • "That hurt my feelings."
  • "Now we're both in the wrong."
  • "I feel like I've inisuated a challenge."
  • "We've known each other for three years!"
  • "Well if you exuse me i have some pictures to delete from my computer."
  • "I thought you were a woman."
  • "I'm building a meat dragon and any meat won't do."
  • "In that case, I should probably mention that all our luggage is filled with orphan meat."
  • "Your mouth unhinged like a snake."
  • "You've tracked mud all over the carpet! "
  • "Then there is an imposter on the loose!"
  • "I've been jamming on the saxophone all morning."
  • "Happy birthday!"
  • "Please tell me you had nothing to do with this."
  • "I ripped the tag off a mattress."
  • "This isn't funny."
  • "What? It's hard to hear you over the sound of melting city."
  • "Who's laughing? Clearly not all the people who just exploded."
  • "And friend ship is two pals munching on a well roasted face together."
  • "I think I'm gonna throw - oh, one just touched me."
  • "Probably because I'm a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence."
  • "I don't understand how you keep forgetting that."
  • "It's not nearly as tasteful as I pictured it in my head."
  • "Raw face is just gross."
  • "I know you’ve done something."
  • "I am a respected member of the community to even insinuate."
  • "I baked some banana bread for our neighbor."
  • "Hmm, I stepped on a ladybug by accident."
  • "What do you mean, “huh”?"
  • "I may have created a crack in spacetime…. through which to collect billions of baby hands."
  • "Well, y’know, whities gotta pay."
  • "And the payment is baby hands."
  • "Well from here it looks like a weather balloon."
  • "I'm not in the mood for this."

Not gonna lie, wasn’t a big fan of Pastel!Marco and Punk!Jean until fangirlregretsnothing’s This Nerd’s Got Bite It’s so funny you guys and Marco is like the best oh my gosh.

anonymous asked:

Why do some of the characters in your drawings have a floating eye? I'm not trying to criticize, I'm just curious. :)

because eyes are expressive and very funny and useful and I like to keep them both, so I take it from the other side of the face where it should be and put it in the air so you do not forget about it 

Insults: R5 Edition
  • pass me BYE
  • here comes forNEVER
  • (I wanna) forget about you
  • wishin I never met you
  • cali girl u ugly
  • aint no way I’m goin home with you
  • not fallin for you
  • I want u bad NOT
  • one last dance bc u ugly
  • say you’ll leave
  • my confession is u ugly
  • not crazy 4 u
  • I cant be with you 
  • all about the goodBYE
  • enough of u already bye
  • keep away from me
  • im happy without you

I was just putting Preston down to bed and he was like “ mommy can we talk” I was like yea

He was like “will I always have autism will it go away” my heart sank I wanted to cry but I sat up straight looked him in his eyes and told him how special he was.

He said he was nervous about 1st grade bc of the Bully’s… “ I will b on the big playground with the older kids… What if they don’t want to play with me”

Just when I thought my heart couldn’t sink any lower it did ,its on the pit of my stomach my tear glands want to release but I won’t allow it.

So I told him “ baby there will always b bullies people r mean people don’t like me and are mean to me sometimes” , but why mommy you are funny and beautiful and cook good food" he replies. I know that but the people who bully me don’t care they only want to see you in hurt it gives them power… But what does mommy always tell you Preston"

He looks at me and smiles and says “ I am strong I am brave I am funny smart and handsome and I will change the world” I can see his posture straighten up “ "if I want to paint and no one else does I will paint alone” he continues to say

Goodnight Preston I kiss him on the forehead get up walking towards the door “wait mommy” he says cheerfully “ you are strong , you are brave you are funny and smart and make good food don’t forget the make good food part that’s important keep feeding me” he laughs then request bacon eggs and sausage for breakfast

“ Goooooddddd night Preston” i say with a smile on my face as i close the door.

I can only hope as a mother that I I still enough self confidence in him that bullies don’t have him second guessing himself or his greatness

Estranged, Lost, Found [1/2]

Summary:  Ford lost his brother to the portal he created.  By dismantling it to save the world, he ensured Stanley’s death.  Thirty years later, the winter his reclusive lifestyle is disrupted by a pair of painfully familiar twins, someone knocks on his door.

[A/N:  Gravity Falls AU for a classic holiday film, since it’s still kind of the holiday season.  Starts off angsty.  Gets progressively… not.  Don’t look at me like that.]



Looking back, Ford wasn’t sure when exactly things had started going completely, horribly wrong.

His English classes back in college had taught him to look at the root causes of problems, the core motivations of people. If he really wanted to put that hat back on again, write a comprehensive yet efficient thesis or two… he could make a very decent argument that everything began not the day his dreams of academia had whirred to a stop prematurely (not unlike his sabotaged perpetual motion machine) but long, long before. 

With his six-fingered hands, with the cruelty of the children at school, with the almost obsessive way he and his brother stuck entirely together against the world.

But only one-twelfth of Ford was an English major, and so he had some other hypotheses to toss forward as well. Perhaps it was when their father had kicked Stanley out of house and home, with nothing more than an already-packed bag and a used car. 

When Ford had watched him drive away, a thousand brimming thoughts that refused to translate into words. The many, many occasions when Ford had said to himself, “It’s been daysweeksmonthsyears, Ma would know where he is, what if I -?” and thought better worse of it.

When he had sold his soul to a demon. When he had called on his estranged brother after a decade of silence to help him stop said demon from ending the world.

When he and said estranged brother had the bright idea to physically brawl within vicinity of a doomsday device.

But if Ford had to bet, really had to pin it down on one moment… the choice was easy: the exact moment he pushed his brother into range of an activated interdimensional portal.

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anonymous asked:

As somebody who sent you something about misreading your name, I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was hurtful to you. On a happier note, what exactly is the spine condition that Joschka has? I have scoliosis, so when I saw him I thought that was super interesting that you had an oc with something wrong with their spine. c:

Nah, don’t feel bad about that. It was really funny at first.

But whoah, I’m genuinely surprised that someone still remembers Joschka! He’s definitely one of those characters I keep forgetting myself, ach. 

I think he has something similar to Ankylosing spondylitis. The crookedness of his spine is caused by the vertebrae ossifying together, inflicting chronic pain and restricting movement greatly. When I first created him, I was indeed inspired by scoliosis (which I also have myself, a very mild case though), but I needed the disease to be progressive and potentially terminal.