i just wish you were still alive

anonymous asked:

Seven years since show ended... how the hell fma fandom is still alive!?? I wish my current fandom were this strong. Why do you think this happens?

it really is amazing, isn’t it dear anon? i think it’s mostly because of 4 reasons:

1. FMA’S STORY. tbh if you ask any anime fan who’s watched fma what their favorite animes were, fma would would most likely be near the top of that list. its writing is just so so amazing and its characters are so well-written. there are so many symbolisms and metaphors and parallels and that makes it such a memorable anime. the story is so intense that it’s rly easy to get into it and you don’t forget that experience of watching it for the first time. the anime community has pretty much agreed that fma is one of if not THE BEST anime out there story-wise and character-wise. it’s so popular in the western AND japanese fandoms and that draws new people in to watch it.

2. New fans. like i said in the last point, there are so many new people coming into the anime community every day. fma is one of the first animes that people usually watch, and it’s because of how recognized it is as “one of the greatest animes out there.” it ranks #2 on myanimelist !!! when people are new to anime and they see that, it makes them want to start watching it, and new people are joining the fandom every day. they get invested just like the rest of us, and they want to see more content and create content. it’s a cycle that keeps going on and on when old fans die out and new ones come in.

3. No complete ending. one of the amazing things about fmab’s and the manga’s ending is that there technically is none. it gives a happy ending and a brief synopsis of what the characters are doing years after the promised day, but it still leaves SO MUCH up for interpretation, and that’s where fans and their creative abilities come in. there is so much you can do with fmab’s story and its after-ending in terms of writing fanfics and comics. there’s so much space open enough for fans to create their own headcanons and story lines and adventures with the brothers and the rest of the cast. there is so much you could write about the world of fma because it’s so diverse and there are so many lovable characters. content is so easy to come up with and get indulged in, and that’s why a lot of fans join the fandom after they’ve watched it. they want to see MORE because fma’s ending is satisfying but still not complete, and you could still do so much with it. fma also has such complex writing that you’ll notice new things every time you re-watch it, or you’ll read an analysis post and find out something you’ve never realized before. everyone loves talking about the anime and finding all those parallels and symbols that it has, and getting indulged in that gives so much more to explore about the anime’s life lessons and meanings for things.

4. NOSTALGIA. fma’s first anime came out in 2003 and the manga even further back in 2001. there are people of so many different ages right now watching fma and loving it. it is such a memorable and nostalgic anime that it’s so easy for people to come back into the fandom even after years of watching the show! and that’s because it brings such a huge wave of nostalgia and the anime is just so good that people don’t forget their experiences with it. you could join 10, 20 more fandoms and not really be into fma anymore, but trust me when i tell you, when you suddenly see a really cool fanart piece of edward elric or someone doing an intense analysis on a certain scene years after you left the fandom, all of those feelings just come rushing right back. i’ve seen so many people draw fanart for fma and in the caption say stuff like “watched this back in 2005 and now all the feelings are hitting me all over again.” it’s just amazing how one anime can have such an impact on people’s lives, and i really do mean it when i say that fma is one of those animes that really does change your view on life. it’s so easy to connect to others with it because everyone feels the same way about it. the fandom won’t be dying out any time soon

A DARKER SHADE OF MAGIC / A GATHERING OF SHADOWS by v. e. schwab sentence meme.

  • ❛  I’d rather die on an adventure than live standing still.  ❜
  • ❛  After all, you can kill people, but you cannot kill magic. Not truly.  ❜
  • ❛  Impossible. What a useless word, in a world with magic.  ❜
  • ❛  Everyone thinks I have a death wish, you know? But I don’t want to die – dying is easy. No, I want to live, but getting close to death is the only way to feel alive. And once you do, it makes you realize that everything you were actually doing before wasn’t actually living. It was just making do. Call me crazy, but I think we do the best living when the stakes are high.  ❜
  • ❛  You have two faces. One you wear for the world at large, and the one you wear for those you love.  ❜
  • ❛  Everyone’s immortal until they’re not.  ❜
  • ❛  It is as it is. It cannot be undone. So please, be grateful, and be done with it.  ❜
  • ❛  The thing about freedom? It doesn’t come naturally. Almost no one has it handed to them. I’m free because I fought for it.  ❜
  • ❛  I know you can do this. I know you can hear me. Stay with me. Listen to my voice.  ❜
  • ❛  Maybe you just got a taste of what it really means to be alive. You almost died. So now you know what it feels like to live. To fear for that life. To fight for it. And once you know, well, there’s no going back.  ❜
  • ❛  You made a mistake. Everybody makes them. Even me. I’ve made many. It’s only fair that you made one.  ❜
  • ❛  I did only what I had to do. If I could have given my life for yours, I would have.  ❜
  • ❛  A kiss for luck. Not that I need it.  ❜
  • ❛  I know. I know what and who you are. What will you do? Kill me?  ❜
  • ❛  Why am I the only one in this fucking world to be held accountable for my actions?  ❜
  • ❛  Aren’t you afraid of dying?  ❜
  • ❛  I’m sorry. For whatever happened to you. For whoever hurt you so deeply that you see things like friends and fondness as weapons instead of shields.  ❜
  • ❛  You know so little of war. Battles may be fought from the outside in, but wars are won from the inside out.  ❜
  • ❛  Between the two of us, we’ll tear the whole world down.  ❜
  • ❛  I am going to cut that smile off your face.  ❜
  • ❛  It hurts. More than dying ever did. There are days when I feel like I deserve this.  ❜
  • ❛  Death doesn’t scare me. Not nearly as much as the idea of wasting a perfectly good life in fear of it.  ❜
  • ❛ You’re always so eager to slash and stab, why couldn’t you have stabbed him.  ❜
  • ❛  Which is it, huh? You’re angry at me, or worried about me, or happy to see me? Because I can’t keep up.  ❜
  • ❛  Wouldn’t it be amazing, if we got away with it?  ❜

Keep reading

Obi-Wan: Are you there?
Vader: yep just sitting in another stupid meeting about mining or some other dumb bullshit idek whats up
Vader: btw i thought u said u were done talking 2 me lol 
Obi-Wan: Yes, well, this is an extenuating circumstance.
Obi-Wan: You will never believe who I saw yesterday. I had to tell someone. 
Vader: well i know it wasnt ahsoka lol 
Obi-Wan: What is that supposed to mean??
Vader: nm who’d u see babe
Obi-Wan: MAUL. 
Vader: WTF 
Obi-Wan: I KNOW.
Vader: THAT GUY WAS STILL ALIVE????? 😲
Obi-Wan: Emphasis on “was”. 😏
Vader: LOL 👏 holy shit i wish id seen that 
Vader: wait MAUL found u???? FFS i have the worst fucking inquisitors

4x04

- “you heard him” <3

- Billy needs to die. i hate him.

- jesus christ Anne :( i knew it would happen because of the promo, but fuck…
  i just want her (and Jack) to be save

- bs writers: what if Thomas were still alive? me: dead
  (i was wondering why Silver reacted so strongly to Max talking about london   
  families)

- “wouldn’t you trade it all to have Thomas Hamilton back?” i am dead, this is
  too much, i hate everything

- Silver being most vulnerable with Madi… i wish we would have seen their
  relationship develope more on-screen, rather than off-screen, because as of
  right now, i still only care about them individually, but not together

- i love how Eleanor talked about Max and her back in the day… i miss these
  two together

- also, damn she is pregnant. that sure will end well…

- there were so many throwbacks to “before” Max/Eleanor, Thomas/James… my
  heart cannot handle this. especially because now it’s all turned to shit…

- “trust me” Flint, honey, what are you doing?? (also, why split Silver/Flint up
  again?? we don’t have many eps left, why can’t they just share screentime)

- the women really are stealing the show this season, even more than before:
  Max, Eleanor, Madi, Anne… i love them all and want them all save

- i have given up hope, that we see Anne/Max again… fuck :(

Thinking back to when we use to talk I remember all the “I love you’s”. I wonder if they were all lies. I gave you my heart only for you to break it without saying a word. Left me wondering what I did wrong. If you meant anything you said. Looking back I still can’t tell if it was all a game to you. I wish you didn’t leave without an explanation. Just leaving me forever wondering
—  @alive-for-now (October 28, 2015)
and I remember when you stopped saying “I love you” unless you were saying “I love you too” and then I remember when even that was too hard for you. And I remember the day that the blue suitcase on the top shelf of my closet disappeared, and so did the passion you had for me here. And the fear of knowing you could leave me and vanish, but so did the reason I ever felt purpose. And it hurts to know that you said goodbye, I just thank god that you’re alive. And I’m happy that you’re happy and my joy comes from knowing you were once mine. And I’m grateful for that, and even though there’s so many words I wish I could take back, I still thank my God every time I remember you.
—  Hotel Books

Ever since Alan Rickman died I’ve been steering clear of watching the Harry Potter films. I’m just so scared that I will start crying when his scenes come on. Alan was one of my all-time fav Actors and I just can’t bear to watch Harry Potter until I’m ready. Same with other films Alan was in. I can read the Severus Snape parts in the books without any issues but I’m not ready to watch the films yet. I love you so much Alan. I wish you were still alive, happy and cancer free.


(oh oh! there was an ask about this a week or so ago. was this the confession you were looking for?)

anonymous asked:

Hi there , can you write something about Rin and Sousuke showing up at their s/o door one night and breaking down because of all the stress and anxiety they've been feeling lately?

yoyo, i presume you meant Rin & Sousuke being stressed? ALSO TAKING THIS OPPORTUNITY TO SAY I STARTED WATCHING OWARI NO SERAPH AND HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP HELP i am not alright at all i have been crying for most of today over a certain character (guess who and win a prize(?))


Rin 

There were days when Rin wished his father was still alive. It wasn’t that he didn’t feel as though he couldn’t talk to someone else, it was just… His father was the only one who really understood when Rin had an issue with swimming. Recently, he hadn’t been motivated. At all. He’d been speaking to his coach to try and fix the problem, seen multiple sports therapists to try and help him get out of the hole he found himself in, but alas, nothing had worked. You being away for the month hadn’t helped him much, either.

The two of you liked to compared your relationship to that of the moon and the tide - without one being around, the other never quite worked properly. He theorised that your absence, then, must be the cause of his anxiety - it was so sudden and unexpected, and Rin had a feeling that it was entirely due to the simple lack of you in his life. He counted the days to your return, and when the day came when you finally did return to him, he nearly broke down.

It was at the airport, unfortunately, and he’d been coping fairly well, all until he saw you headed towards him, grin on your face and luggage trailing behind you. You looked a little worse for the wear; hair a little messy, dark bags under your eyes; of course, this didn’t even phase Rin - he knew he looked far worse.

“____!!” His voice could be heard above the airport commotion, and, arms outstretched, he let you run to him, heavy bags falling at your side as you embraced him.

“I’ve missed you…” He could have cried when he heard your voice. Sure, you’d spent the last month talking all you could, but you’d been busy with business a lot of the time, and time zone differences made it even harder for the two of you to keep up. Honestly, he was trying to hold it together so much he nearly forgot that you were in his arms. When he released you, he was sure the tears were visible in his eyes, if the look on your face was anything to go by.

“Hey… Let’s get out of here, yeah?” Your voice was like music to his ears - it was all he could hear, and the raging storm of anxiety that had been welling up inside of him over the past month was already being soothed from simply being around you. Picking up your luggage - for even in his current state, Rin remembered his manners - he led you to the car, teeth digging into his lip to prevent his emotions from spilling over too soon.

“Rin…” When he slammed the door of the car shut, fists balled in his lap, you knew something was definitely up. “Are you ok?” You knew he’d be upset that you had to be gone for such a long time - hell, you had suffered too - but this really didn’t look good. His hair was a mess, his skin was pale, and even though his eyes were shining with unshed tears, the usual spark of enthusiasm and passion that resided within his maroon irises was all but gone.

“Not particularly.” His voice cracked, and he could swear he felt blood in his hand from where his nails dug into the skin. He didn’t even want to look at you, rather choosing to direct his glare, blurred by tears, down at his fisted hands. It was only when your hand took a gentle hold of his jaw that he seemed to force himself to look you in the eyes, and it became too much for him to contain.

“I honestly think I can’t function without you, ____! I-I’ve been a wreck - I can’t swim properly, I don’t want to swim, I struggle to get out of bed, I-” An ugly sob cut his shaking voice off, and hot tears rolled down his cheek. You didn’t quite know how to react - generally, your husband was fairly stable, but this… Was unprecedented.

“Rin…” Murmuring his name, feeling tears gather in your own eyes, you reached across the car, gathering him in your arms the best you could, letting his head fall over your shoulder as he continued to cry. Rin cried a surprising amount, but, having been with him as long as you had, you could tell that this was serious. The thought that he had grown so anxious and become so demotivated in the time you were gone unnerved you - was he going to be alright now, or was this a part of something deeper?

“It’s ok now, I’m back.” Voice soft, as though you were nursing an injured animal, you withdrew from his hold, cupping his face in your hands to prompt him to look you in the eyes. He was still shaking, face wet and eyes bloodshot, and at that moment, you honestly knew you’d do anything to help him feel better.

“I’m back. You don’t have to worry any more - I’ll come to your practice tomorrow, I’ll cook for you tonight, we can sleep in the same bed, in each other’s arms, and not worry about having to be apart…” Leaning in, you placed a quick kiss on each of his cheeks. “We can go out for a run tomorrow morning, we can do anything you want.” He seemed to have calmed a little now, the ghost of a smile on his face.

“I’m back. You can get better now, Rin.”

Sousuke 

It all just hit him, one night. He usually managed to keep a fairly clear head - hold himself high and carry on, dismiss his fears and worries as nuances to be sublimated within other activities. He knew exactly what the pressure was, and he knew that he should have dealt with it earlier. Before graduation, before he swam that last relay… He should have just told you how anxious he was about his future, but no, of course, Sousuke Yamazaki remained ever the lone wolf. Even when his brain told him to just tell you, he found himself unable to do so, and a build-up of stress at that level would be enough to make anyone break.

He supposed that it had all started when he’d reached to grab a book from the shelf in his bedroom and had felt the same, stabbing pain in his shoulder that he hadn’t felt for a while yet. Ever since he’d been forced to stop swimming entirely and had resumed his physiotherapy, his shoulder was feeling alright, and so feeling that pain once more only reminded him of the confusion surrounding his future. He hadn’t really known what to do, simply sitting down on his bed and realising that he’d have to be making some serious choices pretty soon. Realising all over again that his dream was shattered wasn’t exactly the most pleasant experience, and, whether he liked to admit it or not, Sousuke soon found himself in the one place he could feel secure at a time like this - your house.

“Eh, Sousuke? What’re you doing here…?”

Your confusion wasn’t unwarranted - it wasn’t like your boyfriend lived next door to you, it was quite the contrary, in fact, with him living at least an hours’ walk from you. He didn’t look all that great, either, oddly vacant look in his eyes as he gazed just over your shoulder.

“Can I come in, ____?” His voice seemed more tense than normal, and you noticed the way he was holding himself; tense all over and yet somehow, slumped, shoulders hunched almost as though he wished to hide himself away. His eyes looked almost red, lips cracking and red from where he’d been biting them - something he only ever did when he was extremely stressed. None of this seemed right, in the slightest.

“Sure. I’ll grab you some tea…” Sousuke hummed in affirmation, stepped inside, took off his shoes, and headed upstairs. It was almost mechanical, and left you both confused and concerned. Had something happened? It wasn’t… No, it couldn’t be his shoulder. He’d told you that he was over that now.

When you entered your bedroom, tea in hand, you were shocked to find your boyfriend lying on his front on your bed, face buried in your pillows - he wasn’t moving, and didn’t even stir when you called his name. This whole situation was unusual… Him visiting your house at this time of night without warning, his almost mechanical movements, and now this.

“Sousuke? Are you alright…? You-”

“I don’t know what to do, ____.” His voice was muffled, still smothered by the pillows around him. You really didn’t know what to say; what did he mean?

“… I don’t really understand…” Feeling a little sheepish, you sat the tea down on your bedside table, carefully perching next to Sousuke on the bed and running your fingers up his spine in an effort to comfort him. He responded to your gentle touch, rolling over slightly so that he could face you.

“I mean that I don’t know what to do about the future. I don’t think I realised that I don’t actually have any ‘solid’ plans…” He looked and sounded lost - as though he were a child, given an ultimatum that he had no control over. “I could go and work for my dad, yeah, but I still want to do something with myself.”

Grunting, he pulled himself up, running a hand through his hair. Unsure of what to do, your teeth nibbled at your bottom lip - you’d never seen him like this before, he was usually so sure of himself… Was that all a front? Looking at him now, eyes downcast and shoulders slumped, you were struggling to think of anything you could say to comfort him.

“I’m… Uh… I’m not going to pretend I know how you feel,” there was no point in lying about that - he was in a rather unique position, after all, “but what I can say is that I’m here for you.”

Slowly, his gaze rose from where it lay on the floor, eyes staring into yours for an almost uncomfortably long while, before he spoke.

“I know, ____.” Moving a little closer to you, he held his arms open, a small smile gracing his features. “That’s part of what’s getting me through. Having you here… Knowing you’ll always be there. It’s not exactly fun, thinking about the future, especially recently; so having you there is more comforting than you know. Truly.”

He drew you closer to his chest, encasing you in strong arms, allowing your head to rest against his chest, listening to his heartbeat, allowing it to calm you a little. Even though he was the one that came to you, even though it was he who had to undergo a such a massive change to his life, he was still there for you, in much the same way you were there for him. And, really, that knowledge was all that either of you needed.

Second Chance

Imagine you hooked up with Chris Argent, and he left before you woke up, but comes back later, saying he had to think.

It’s been exactly one week since Allison’s death, and it was as if it was just yesterday. The pain was still there, except it wasn’t even pain. It was agony. She was the only person that I would ever trust with my life. And then she died.

At least the oni were destroyed, the nogitsune captured, and Stiles is alive. I wish Allison was alive. She’s purity in a body. Her death also brought me and Chris closer. He’s a wreck just like I am. Along with Isaac. Scott is hiding his pain, while Lydia… I feel bad for her. She actually felt her friend’s death as it happened. No one really knows what she is doing.

Me on the other hand… Well Chris and I hooked up. He left before I was awake. I don’t have a clue where he went. I know it was a stupid thing to do. Have sex with your dead best friend’s father.

It’s not like Allison and I were the same age or anything. I’m four years older, so it’s not as weird in my opinion. If I was Allison’s age I never would have done it. But I guess he thought it was weird. There i go again… Crossing boundaries.

I looked around my messy apartment, broken glass in random spots on my floor, articles of clothing spread around, picture frames broken, basically all of the signs of a nervous breakdown or a serious temper tantrum. I guess both fit.

Another month had passed, and I gave up hope. Chris was never coming back. Everyone else was slowly getting back into their routines, but it was as if I was in a vacuum. I couldn’t move, I couldn’t even function normally anymore. The agonizing loss of my friend became crippling, and I have no one to pull me out of this vortex.

It was close to midnight, and I still wasn’t asleep. I think I lost the ability. Everytime I closed my eyes, I saw the oni impaling Allison with a sword, and then her falling to the ground, close to death.

I know ny behavior isn’t normal or healthy for that matter, but why should I be okay when Allison isn’t? My friends come over frequently to make sure I’m eating, but I never talk. I wish Chris would come here, I need that personal connection again. That intimacy that I simply don’t have with anyone else. That I have never had.

I heard the sound of glass breaking, which pushed me into hyper awareness. I jumped up quickly, grabbed my gun, and clicked the safety off. Just because I’m in agony due to the loss of a friend does not mean I am going to be defenseless and get myself killed. My friends don’t deserve that.

I got up, and kicked off my shoes, so I wouldn’t make a sound. I walked silently down the hall, and I made sure to keep my breathing and heart rate under control, in case whoever is breaking and entering is a supernatural creature. A girl can never be too careful.

I carefully peered around the corner, and I saw a shadow flitting around. The person has too much grace and lithe to be completely human. Even Allison, and all of the Argents for that matter weren’t that graceful and quiet.

I silenced my breath, and I squared my shoulders. The Argents taught me many things, especially how to approach any panic inducing situation. Clinically and unemotionally. I edged around the corner, sticking with the shadows, and moving slowly. The figure turned to me, and I saw that it was a woman with pale skin and glowing purple eyes. She rushed at me, and I quickly raised my gun, and made a single shot into her head, but she kept coming. She didn’t even register that she had a bullet in her head.

“Sailee get down!” A familiar voice yelled. I instantly dropped to the ground, and Chris rushed forwards with what looked like a bronze knife. He stabbed the woman in the neck, and pulled. She cried out, and the blade seemed to melt. He dropped down, and covered my body with his. There was a blinding purple light, and there was a high pitched sound, that made my ears bleed.

It seemed like this went on for hours, but it was only about three seconds. Once the light faded, and the sound ceased, Chris sat up, and he looked around. I did as well and I saw that there was a fine powdery dust covering practically covering everything.

“Go clean yourself up. I’ll clean down here. Then I’ll explain everything.” He said. I grabbed my gun then I got to my feet.

“No disappearing acts” I said crossing my arms over my chest.

“None. I’ll be here when you’re done.” He said. I looked at his face, and his eyes were sincere. I turned on my heel, and butterflies erupted in me.

I ran up the stairs, and I grimaced at my reflection. I began brushing my knotted hair, then I washed my face. I concealed the dark bags under my eyes, then brushed my teeth. I went into my room, and I stowed away my gun, and I changed clothes. Once I was done it took me about twenty minutes before I convinced myself to actually go down stairs and face Chris. I was mad that he avoided me. I can’t go and do the same. My heart was racing in my chest, and I’m surprised I didn’t have a heart attack and fall to the ground dead.

I approached the living room, and I saw that it was clean, and Chris was sitting on my couch, his shoulders taught, and he had his head in his hands. A clear sign of nervousness. He must have felt my presence, because he lifted his head, and gave me a tight smile.

“Sailee, come here.” He said. I nodded my head, and I walked over, feeling my stomach tighten due to nerves. I sat down, and I looked down at my feet.

“What came after me?” I asked.

“She’s called a willok. She comes and takes away young women’s pain, by taking their souls."Chris said.

"How did you know that she would come after me?” I asked, looking up at his face for answers, hut as usual, he was closed off.

“I was tracking her, but it was obvious who it was going for. Either you or Lydia, but after I narrowed you guys down further, it was obviously you.” He said.

“How so?” I asked.

“Willoks go for young women who are aware of the supernatural. They have had a significant loss of someone, followed my heart break.” Chris said.

“So why me? Why did you think it was me and not Lydia?” I asked.

“Because Aiden died, that’s grief. Not heartbreak. And I… I left you. After what…” He said, a tone of shame and regret. But of what exactly?

I looked down at the floor feeling a knot form in my stomach. “That’s not your fault.” I said.

“Yes it is! The heartbreak has to be caused by a person who loves you! I love you, and I broke your heart by leaving. That’s what drew the willok here.” Chris said, with such strength and pain in his voice.

“Chris, it is not your fault. You didn’t know that I love you.” I said. There it is. The truth spilled out. I sat nervously on the couch, feeling my anxiety heighten.

“Yes I did! How you acted around me… I just… I was afraid. I was afraid of hurting you, and getting you killed. I thought… I thought that after I left then everything would be okay. I was wrong. I left also because I had to think things through.” He said to me. I looked up with wide, frightful eyes, and he placed his strong hand gently on my face. “If you give me a second chance, you won’t regret it.” He said. My eyes travelled along his features, and he was telling the truth. I know that much.

“I believe you. You have that second chance. You’ve always had it.” I whispered, feeling the fragments that is my life finally fitting back together.

one thing i so wish they hadn’t changed in the dub is THIS EXCHANGE

im mainly referring to this (this is a very rough translation):

Roy: 1st Lieutenant.

Riza: Yes.

Roy: I’m glad you are alive.

Riza: I’m sorry i worried you.

because instead of Roy being the one to initiate the exchange, the dub of brotherhood has Riza doing so and Roy dismissing her thanks as not important right now. literally “tell me later. lets just stay focused on the mission right now.”

I mean I get what they were trying to do and its still nice to have that sort of moment but instead of it being focused on the fact that Roy was terrified of reliving Hughes’ death with Riza and her acknowledging that, it’s turned into the thing I dont like when guys in media dont get to talk about feelings or things that literally just happened because we must be strong. And I feel brotherhood was trying to foreshadow Rizas breakdown with Lust but the nice thing about this show/manga is it doesn’t really need any more foreshadowing. Anyone with any reading/ watching comprehension can tell that these characters care deeply for one another (even with my shipping goggles aside) so her breakdown doesnt feel out of the blue.

I AM JUST RAMBLING AT MIDNIGHT IGNORE ME I HAVE LOTS OF FEELINGS ABOUT FMA

1. The way I could miss everyone and everything that love ever offered in a simple day like this. February 14th, a curse for some. The day of longing and craving someone we can’t have. Baby, to you, I may be nothing, but to me you’re still my everything. I miss you.

2. Chocolate always tasted sweeter when you were around. That’s why I don’t eat chocolate much. A reminder that some people are just candy. Pretty to the taste, but a rot for your teeth. I wished I could be your sweetie, but today is not ours. I’m sorry, but you should keep the poetry. It isn’t for me.

3. I didn’t mean to break you before today. I didn’t, I promise. My days are becoming nights and my mornings are filled with darkness. The way the sunlight melts my heart because of the way you made me feel alive. But I still broke you. I despise my poetry for what it did to you. How you fell in love with me, with it. Did you see me for more than words? I wish you did. I wanted to be heard, yes, but I wanted to be seen more. Without you, I think I died.

4. I’m lonely again and this time, it’s my own choosing. I can’t you out of my head. I can’t control my emotions. I can’t do anything without fear of being suppressed by these thoughts of things falling apart. I can barely write, but I must. I don’t remember spending today alone, ever. Today is the first time for everything story. We will be forever and always a book with no ending. Loose papers with your names scattered. The pen is losing its messages and I am not one to kiss and tell.

5. It feels like everyone has someone today. Everything had something today. My brother and his angry fiancé, but at least they have one another. The computer and the keyboard, at least they’ll work together. The moon and the stars, they all left today. It’s foggy and cloudy, but grey was always my favorite in the end. The poet and the pen, my only love this year. I’m terrified because it’s sad, but quite lovely to be by myself.

6. Did anyone else not get held today? What about for the last few months? Fear not, I’ll hold you tonight. You can cry in my arms for poetry is all I have to offer. Did anyone tell you about your beautiful smile? It is. Always will be. The crooked ones, the braces, the missing ones, the flawless pearl ones, you’re all magnificent. I wish you feel held tonight.

7. I no longer remember what a kiss feels like. Was it the pairing of lips and moving of tongues? Or the way you pressed your body against mine? Was it the way you tried to rip my heart right out of my chest? I bet it’s still beating and bleeding in your tiny palms. Tonight is still terrific as long as you’ll be mine. I’m sorry about the blood, you’ll always have a smile that can shake my soul.

8. Tomorrow a reminder of yesterday. Yesterday a reminder of love. Last month a reminder of birthdays. Last December I knew about suffering and self-inflicted pain. How the drugs never leave your brain. How you still feel high. How you wish you could die. How lips felt like bullets. How eyes were snipers. How words shattered by your touch.

9. I know you still love me and I still love you. I know. You know. We know. It’ll always be us. Just breathe a bit slower. Smile a little wider. Read lighter books. Break less hearts. Take my art and make it yours. Poetry, our disconnected connection, the everlasting language of the last remaining years. I am, but all that I’ve ever feared. A reason to push you away, but want to keep you near.

10. Please give me the strength to heal. I’m tired of the empty chest feeling. I’m sick of giving unexplained deep sighs as it leaves my nicotine breath. I’m sorry if I wasn’t good enough. Please give me the love to move on. I’m tired of feeling broken. I’m sick of myself.

11. I hope you sleep easy tonight. You. The one reading this. I hope you feel better than me. I hope you feel loved. If no one told you lately, I love you. I love you. I love you. I love-

12. Breathe, even if it’s the hardest thing to do before you make your coffee. Breathe, even if they don’t love you like how you love them. It’s better to have loved than to not at all. She told me that. Now I’m telling you. Breathe, even if you want to suffocate. I’m here for you. I’ll always be here for you.

13. Did anyone leave your side today? It’s okay. The bed won’t. The blankets will keep you warm. The water sliding down your throat because you can’t speak, they’ll keep you quenched. The tears dripping from your cheekbones; the oldest of souls. They’ll keep you company. My poetry is for you and me. A love I will hold until I’m dry from tears and out of blood. I’ll be your starfish and you can be the beach. I’ll be your clouds and you can be the rain. I’ll hold you inside.

14. Did anyone call you mine today? No? Don’t worry. You’re above possessive pet names. You don’t need to be mine to be mine. You don’t need a flower nickname or hickies on your necks. You don’t need to write today. You don’t need to love today. You don’t need to do anything today. Don’t feel. Don’t cry. Don’t be sad. Don’t be anything less than you. If that means under a blanket while looking at stars, that’s you. If that means crying because your what if’s found a way to terrorize your already tormented soul, so be it. If you feel every fucking thing the universe has to offer, I’d still love you. Or if you feel nothing at all. At your lowest point. About to break. Want to kill yourself. The bottle is empty again. The heart is cracked once more. The eyes are lost in a maze and they are just passing by. The way you feel their hands touch your waist. The pills are heavier than ever, right? The sadness always strike at night. I know. But hey, it won’t be okay and that is alright.

—  Because I’d love you even if you aren’t.

Can we talk about how perfect MinaKushi are? They’re the best love story out there tbh.

Like true I ship ShikaTema and NaruHina and SasuSaku and they all have great love stories and all but MinaKushi are special idek

The way they met and how Minato saved her and how they fell in love and got married and had the most beautiful pure loveable child in the world and it’s just beautiful.

I wish Kishi had shown us more MinaKushi moments they’re beautiful better I wish they were still alive to support Naruto and be there at his wedding and meet their grand children and god nothing goes the way you want now does it?

sole survivor x hancock

FO4 spotify playlist + my silly ass commentary

/crushin’ hard on dat ghoul
/prepare to go on a feel trip with me ok 

I. sole survivor emerges from the vault

how would it feel to wake up over 200 years after you should have died, wandering through a shell of everything you knew, walking through your usual haunts and seeing that just about every single person from “your time” is dead? It’s miraculous that you’re still alive, but all you can feel is this overwhelming wish that you were dead 

I Shall Rise - Karen O
They’ll know my name
After the storms are passing through
They’ll know my name
When they’ve forgotten all about you
They’ll know my name


Black Hole Sun - Nouela
Stuttering, cold and damp
Steal the warm wind tired friend
Times are gone for honest men


Mother - Florence + The Machine

And oh Lord, won’t you leave me
Leave me just like this?
Cause I belong to the ground now
I want no more than this


Time Go - Caught A Ghost
Living on the back nine, living out your past life, trying to make a living as an outlaw
But the problem you see, stealing ain’t what it used to be, everyone’s used to it by now

Stray Dog Freedom - Bright Eyes
/ … had to throw in a song about dogmeat hehe

II.  arriving in Goodneighbor

the sole survivor visits the memory den, grieves their dead spouse, comes to terms with their death and attempts to put on a brave face for what’s to come. you are a person out of time, after all. 

Gunshot - Lykke Li
Gunshot, can’t take it back
My heart cracked, really loved you bad
Gunshot, I’ll never get you back


The Memory Machine - Julia Stone
I miss you
I miss you


Time Forgot - Conor Oberst
Boarding a train to take my memories back
Make up for time that I have lost
I’ll never know if I’m delusional
I just believe that I am not
I’m going to work for my sanity
Give it everything I got
Though so far I have cheated death
I know someday I’ll get caught
Just living

Bullet Proof… I Wish I Was - S. Carey
Limb by limb and tooth by tooth
Tearing up inside of me
Every day every hour
I wish that I was bullet proof 

Long & Lost - Florence + The Machine
Is it too late to come on home?

Far Away From Here - Stu Larson
she’s so far away from here
nobody’s gonna lead you
nobody’s gonna dare
and I’d love to know the reasons for her tears
but she holds them deep inside with all her fears

/imagine hancock catches a glimpse of the sole survivor after her first experience at the memory den

Circadian Rhythm (Last Dance) - Silversun Pickups
I’ve got nowhere left to dream
So I’ll just stay awake 

/probably how both hancock and the sole survivor feel, for their own separate reasons– the night after shit with bobbi went down, and hancock agrees to travel with the sole survivor. they both have an odd feeling of curiosity for each other, and meet up the next morning to leave goodneighbor.  maybe they’re both what the other one needs? =^^=

III. leaving Goodneighbor with Hancock in tow… drug fueled shenanigans and feelsssss ensue

Catastrophe! - Julia Stone
It seems like every road we walk
Catastrophe awaits us
It seems like every time we talk
Catastrophe awaits us
And I know that we’re just two strangers
Looking for the same idea 

/the best “let’s get this party started” companion song I could find hahaha

Black & White - The Staves
Well I can bite my lips, I can chew my hair
But I’m still stone heavy and unprepared
Like an empty chair I was always there

/sole survivor is ‘wraaastlin’ with some difficult feelings when it comes to traveling with someone for extended periods of time, hancock is the first person she has really spent day-in-and-day-out with since leaving dogmeat back in sanctuary. maybe the do drugs together for the first time. 

Difference is Time - Conor Oberst
But there’s an end I shouldn’t eat
When I’m done dancing to this beat
On my headstone it’ll be written
“Life is hard, even if you cheat.”

/could apply to 1) sole survivor, who cheated death with the cryo chamber only to be thrown into a world she was unprepared for, 2) hancock, who cheated death/ i guess even life with the radioactive drug… maybe they do a lil more drugs out during their adventures hahha

Between the Bars - Elliott Smith
Drink up one more time and I’ll make you mine
Keep you apart, deep in my heart
Separate from the rest but I like you the best
Keep the things you forgot
People you’ve been before
That you don’t want around anymore
That push and shove and won’t bend to your will
I’ll keep them still

/sole survivor and hancock get seriously smashed at the third rail, like blackout drunk.  they have a good time and barely make it back to the rex still standing. they’re in goodneighbor for a few days to resupply.

I’m On Fire - AWOLNATION
Sometimes it’s like someone took a knife, baby, edgy and dull
and cut a six-inch valley through the middle of my soul
At night I wake up with the sheets soaking wet and a freight train running through the
middle of my head
Only you can cool my desire

I’m on fire
/the morning after, both in their own hotel rooms, both seriously hungover. hancock thinking about how he suddenly has this feelings in the pit of his stomach for sole. 

Friendly Fires - Silversun Pickups
So who could ever break you down?
And what could ever freak you out?
If you can carry this around.
Then you will never break down
Then you will never break down
Then you carry this around.

/from sole’s perspective, hungover, dry mouth, thinking about how she has feelings for the ghoul on the other side of the hotel room wall. 

I’m With You (Remix) - Grouplove
And away we’ll go
And we’ll ride in slow
It’s all I see
When I make believe
That I’m falling for yooooooooou
You know it’s truuuuuuuue

/a night of dancing to magnolia at the third rail, obviously high on jet and a little tipsy, both sole and hancock are testing the waters a bit with these weird feels 

Bitin’ the Bullet - Grouplove
People cause nightmares
Then they get to the tracks, they’re behind us
Wishing they could time us
But the rocks gonna make you shine brighter
And maybe we’ll tire
So I found a gun for you to fire
Boom!
Red bullets like a tiger
But the wings like a bird so I fly ya

/the perfect feelgood super high on drugs song. their night at the third rail comes to a close, they head back to the rex giggling and maybe both just stay in sole’s room and have an explosively fun one night stand

Beautiful Rain - Jude Woodhead
/threw this one in because it’s peaceful, and i imagine them laying together while a heavy rain comes down outside in the wee hours of the morning after they slept together, no other cares in the world, not quite knowing what everything really means yet between them

Dissolve - Absofacto
your voice like an angel
been chain smoking all month long
like you’re someone i believe in
you held me but i’m volatile
and never got my head screwed on
now i’m melting through the floor
am i only a lab rat?
someone you can test things on?
are you training for a new love?
all in white, like you’re an angel
with the sun glimmering off your glass mask

this isn’t what i signed up for  
/stuff is a little awkward the next day, sole is gone when hancock wakes up, and when he walks out of the rex she’s leaning against a lightpost with their gear– ready to head out and handle some business. hancock is a big puddle of feels and can’t really read sole

Fantasy - Alina Baraz & Galimatias
So you say you wanna get away
We don’t need a plane
I could be your escape
Take you to a place
Where there’s no time, no space
I could be your private island
On a different planet
Anything could happen
Listen to the waves
Let them wash away your pain

/it’s weird between them for a few days, sole takes hancock up the coast to kingston lighthouse, a place she used to go before the war to sun on the beach. they clear the way and make a campfire on the beach.  she tells him about how expensive it was pre-war to buy a home on the coast, trying to convert bottlecaps to dollars so that he understands how ridiculous the economy was, and it gives him insight into why the war was even a reality back then. he loves hearing her prewar stories, and then she takes his hands in hers and asks him if he would like to make a home with her here.

Not on Drugs (Remix) - Tove Lo

Baby, don’t you see?
I’m not on drugs, I’m not on drugs,
I’m just in love
You’re high enough for me

/hancock is blown away by sole, he’s never felt this way, and then this angel wakes from her slumber beneath the earth and manages to do more good in a matter of months than he has done in nearly a decade. 

Loot - Club Kuru
So just lie with me tonight
Without a tear in your eye
Away from noise in the dark
Away from all you lost out

/hancock is wondering how sole is feeling about her dead husband, he remembers her crying at the memory den, but eventually accepts that she must have chosen hancock despite any feelings she might still have.

Skin - Josh Record
Feel my skin against your skin
I want to feel your soul within
I know it but not what it hides
I’d love to know your skin inside
I bruise to love you

/sappy love feels hnnng this song is perfect from soles perspective bc hancock is a ghoul

Open - Rhye
/more sappy stuff srry

Be Together - Major Lazer & Wild Belle
Tell me, is this freedom, baby?
Chasing after danger, making my heart race, woah
Maybe if the stars align, maybe if our worlds collide
Maybe on the dark side we could be together, be together
Maybe in a million miles, on a highway through the stars
Someday soon we’ll be together

/i felt like this one was out of order in the playlist but couldn’t find a good place to move it to. eh i felt like it needed to be included especially nested with the next one

Powerful - Major Lazer & Eli Goulding
Oh my my my, what you do to me
Like lightning when I’m swimming in the sea
From the very first time we loved
From the very first time we touched
Walking on wires and power lines
When you put your body on top of mine
Everytime that you lift me up
To the heaven and stars above


Lullibies (Remix) - Yuna
I wanted to go away with you,
And I will leave all my troubles here.
I wanted to run away with you,
And I will bring all my dreams and fears.

/from sole’s perspective, it probably feels weird to fall in love for the first time after you were supposed to be dead, right?

Love Like This - Wild Belle
Remember when you kissed me by the sea
You were saying all the things that I’d like to believe
That you could give me all your love
You could give me just enough
And we could live in paradise
And never have to leave 

Wasted Time - Vance Joy 
Why…
Why did you go wasting your time on me
You’re so beautiful now
There’s so much that’s left for you now
O, yeah, babe
/i kind of felt like in hancocks relationship dialogue he didn’t feel like he was worthy to be in a long term arrangement with someone, especially this pristine smooth person from another time, so this song kind of addresses that

Like Real People Do - Hozier
I will not ask you where you came from
I will not ask you, neither should youHoney just put your sweet lips on my lips
We should just kiss like real people do
/sole’s response to those feels that hancock is having, she can reassure him like nobody else can

For You - Angus and Julia Stone 
If you love me with all of your heart
If you love me
I’ll make you a star in my universe
You’ll never have to go to work
You’ll spend every day
Shining your light my way
/another one, same as above

Only Love - Ben Howard
Darling I feel you, under my body
Darling you’re with me, forever and always.
Give me shelter or show me heart.
And watch me fall apart, watch me fall apart.

/dem feels

Fire and the Flood - Vance Joy
Since we met I feel a lightness in my step
You’re miles away but I still feel you
Anywhere I go there you are
Anywhere I go there you are
Late at night when you can’t fall asleep
I’ll be lying right beside you counting sheep

/moar feelz

I Want to Live Here Julia Stone
However you see what’s going on
However you judge what is right, what is wrong
There’s nothing ahead of us, no, there is no path
Everything’s rolling along, nothing will last
I wanna live here, I wanna live here
I want to live

/sole wants to live in this moment in time forever, will she become a ghoul so they can be together and rebuild the surface for years to come? or will she grow old and die, leaving him alone? or… will she take over lorenzo cabot at the asylum and use his serum to live for as long as she needs to live?

blah sorry if you had to hastily scroll past all of my nonsense bc i’m cluttering up the fallout 4/hancock tags hahaha

feel free to use my playlist/random thoughts as prompts, i love fanfic and there needs to be more x.x dem feels got me feeling some kind of way eheh. enjoy. 

I wish I could have done it differently.
Called you back immediately and
I’ve always wondered about that day.
If anything would change or if it would just stay the same.
I just want you to know that I love you; I love you so.
I wish I answered it tears me apart.
I wanted to help you but there is no restart.

How could I’ve known this was coming?
I thought you were fine.
I never imagined you wanted your time.

And I’ll just wait so patiently at night
Wishing you were still alive.
I just wish you could have known we would have helped,
Never let you go.

Mo Vaughn (He Was a Baseball​-​Man)

TITLE: I Guess This is Growing Up

CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 19

AUTHOR: The-stuttering-kiwi

ORIGINAL IMAGINE: 

Imagine being another child that Odin has brought back to Asgard to raise alongside Thor and Loki.  Thor is always the older brother but even from a young age, there is no denying the connection between you and Loki.

RATING: General


NOTES/WARNINGS: None

And you would let me dry your hair 
I thought about you everywhere 
I haven’t been the same since then 
Just friends

Cause every time I ran
I ran to you
I meant it every time I said I loved you
I kiss the thought of you and I
I still regret the day that we said goodbye

And do you think of me at night 
I still wish we could’ve made it right 
You can’t say that I never tried 
I guess everything seems more clear 
Here on the other side

Tonight Alive - The Other Side


How Sigrun found her way back to her chambers she would never know. Her lungs felt like they were on fire as they screamed for air between her sobs and her eyes were blinded by tears; she felt like she was drowning.

She thought by bringing Thor back they could bring Loki back from the edge but all Loki saw was that she had betrayed him, that she had chosen Thor over him. Just like everyone else had. The hatred she saw in his eyes when he looked at her was seared into her brain. Sigrun couldn’t make it to the bed and collapsed on the cold stone floor where she continued to weep until her body was exhausted enough for her body to sleep.

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badguyreyes  asked:

I have two prompts to send in right now uvu A: Captain swan stealing each other's clothes, like Emma tries on the hook somehow and the long leather jacket and Killian tries on her red leather jacket and refuses to give it back. B: They're by the closed time portal (for some odd reason) and talking about something and then Killian says that he wished Emma would've met Liam, so she comforts him by kissing him, and that opens the time portal to when Liam was still alive.

A/N: stabhappy-pirate​, I love your prompts. Always so creative!
Anyways, enjoy!

you’re the light.

Killian still wasn’t sure where the hell he and Emma were headed.
She’d bloody blindfolded him, too, so he certainly did not know where they were going.
“Swan, can you please tell me what the bloody—”
“Just wait for one more minute.” She replied, and he could almost see her smile.
He gave her hand a gentle squeeze, smiling when she stopped.
“Okay, let’s take this off.” She said, gently pulling off the bandana from around his head. He squinted in the sun before glancing around to find…
The barn where the blasted Wicked Witch had opened that portal.
“Any reason we’re here, of all places?” Killian asked, glancing around.
“Yes, actually.” Emma smiled, moving to stand in front of him, “Killian, I know it’s been hard for you to live on your own for so long. I know how it feels to be alone. So, I wanted to give you something.”
She pulled the wand she’d had from when they traveled into the past, making Killian confused.
“What’s that for?”

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