i just want to put this somewhere

anonymous asked:

Is there a particular reason why you made Yuuri good at cooking? It seems to be a fandom trend and I was wondering why (not calling you out, it's a trend I love i just didn't know if it came from somewhere). And by the way i love nerve endings so much it's one of my favs

I suppose there were two reasons.  One is that I love to cook and I was writing from Yuuri’s perspective, so there’s some self-insertion there (my partner is also bad at cooking though he tries very hard.  It’s no secret I put some of him into my Victor).  

But the other reason (and I’d guess this is why it’s a popular headcanon) is that Yuuri Katsuki LOVES food.  He wants to be katsudon ffs.  It’s not a big leap to assume he’d learn how to cook.  Additionally, Victor eats Mama Katsuki’s katsudon like he’s never had a home-cooked meal in his life.  You don’t get Victor-level good at skating by having a bunch of hobbies, so I doubt he made time to learn how to cook.  

Just my headcanon, though.  That’s the fun thing about headcanons.  We get to do whatever we want with them, hopefully free of judgement or bullying or bad lists ;D

Im tired of waiting to do this.

I’m gonna try to release my book by September 9th 2017.

I always tell people I’m editing it but I’m tired of waiting. The shits been done for almost a year. I’ll be copyrighting it and self publishing on Amazon asap. Hopefully the interest is still there.

I gotta stop putting it off just because I don’t think It’s ready. Plus I’ve already started writing book 2.

I gotta do it. I have to. I really want to be a writer and I have to start somewhere.

Just to be sure its ready tho I’ll be looking for at least 3 people to read it in advance before I publish.

It’ll be free for the 3. After that once it’s up on Amazon it’s gonna need to be paid for by everyone else.

Voltron Ghost Adventures AU where all five of them are just a mess of clunky camera gear and nerves and they constantly have the weirdest experiences as they stumble into haunted houses just hoping for the best

  • “Pidge, you brought the night vision goggles right???” “No, you said grab provisions. I got some Skittles and a Twinkie. Why, do you want the Twinkie?” “Pidge, you had one job.”
  • For some reason, spirits in almost every single house grab Lance’s ass and no one can figure out why
  • “Jesus, Hunk, take me to dinner first” “Lance, I’m across the hall” “Ohhhh my gooooood GUUUYS A SPIRIT JUST GRABBED MY ASS”
  • Shiro always gets things thrown at him. like, every single time. It’s where he’s gotten most of his scars because they’ll be walking into a kitchen and a chair will come skrrrrting around the corner and fly at his face
    • “But why is it always me?” “Probably because you’re so offensively good-looking” 
  • If there’s a scary doll in the house, it will find Keith. It always does.
    • *somewhere, Keith shrieks* “haha guess you could call Keith a chick magnet” “Lance, I hope a spirit pushes you down the stairs just because you said that stupid pun” “Y’know, Pidge, you’re always so sweet to me”
  • Hunk screams at any movement or creak in the house, every single time
  • Pidge gets into the habit of talking with the spirits like they’re her best friends and ignores imminent danger because she just explains it as them having a nice conversation
    • “Hunk, put me down, I’m fine, Charlene just wants to point me to where her body is” “PIDGE, THERE IS A KNIFE FLYING TOWARDS YOUR FACE I DON’T THINK SHE CARES IF YOU FIND HER BODY”
  • Most of the time, they just end up recording them creeping around abandoned shacks really carefully
  • Hunk always uses too much zoom so when he and Lance are exploring the west side of a mansion and Lance turns around and whispers “did you hear that”, all that Hunk sees on his night vision camera is Lance’s huge glowy eyes and his gigantic nostrils
  • At least once a week, they get locked in the basement of wherever they’re exploring and it always becomes a situation of life or death for them to escape yet they forget to plan for how to prevent it for the next time

I want Keith to notice something’s up with Lance. I want him to notice how Lance’s eyes don’t light up nearly as bright anymore as they did before, how his smiles seem strained and fake, like he’s putting up a mask for everyone else’s benefit.

I want Keith to find Lance one late night back in the control room looking at the map of stars and somewhere in there is earth.

I want them to talk and eventually Lance starts pouring out his insecurities.

And all the while Keith is just looking at him confused and he interrupts Lance and starts spilling out about how great Lance is, and how he really is the team’s sharpshooter and pretty much the heart of their team and if it wasn’t for him none of them would be where they are now with Voltron and a family and just…everything.

And he doesn’t realize he’s gone off on a tangent until he stops and his breathing is labored and he realizes it’s gone quiet and the overdue anxiety comes back tenfold as he realizes Lance is silent.

He chances a look up to see Lance with eyes shining and watery and he could’ve sworn he saw a blush across his cheeks too but he’s not given a second glance before he turns away, face burning, hoping what he just said didn’t ruin whatever tentative friendship they had before.

And he’s pretty sure his face is burning when he feels soft lips press against his cheek and hear a small thank you and Lance is leaving the room quickly with his shoulders hunched and fists clenched in embarrassment. And Keith is just sitting there definitely sure his face is the same color as his lion but he holds up fingers to press against the spot where Lance kissed and before he knows it he’s up and running to catch up with Lance.

Quotes from Harry Styles’ Interview

Writing for his album

“I started the album end of Feb last year for about three weeks and then had to stop for about 5 months when I went to do a movie. I came back to it in July and finished writing it in December. For a while before all I thought about it was stressing about what it was going to be. It gave me a chance to completely step away from it for a bit and have a real break. By the end of the movie, because we were swimming so much I just wanted to write songs…I think we wrote about 70 songs - we did 50 songs and ideas in Jamaica and that’s including like little ideas. Well full songs, I say there are 30 songs probably. One of the songs on the album, I wrote a few years ago.”

On his album

“I was with the guys who I was writing it with and we just wanted to make what we wanted to listen to and that has been the most fun part for me about making the whole album. In the least weird way possible, it’s my favourite album to listen to at the moment… I hope we did a good job but I really like the album so I hope people like it. I think if you put out something that you don’t stand behind and really love, then if it doesn’t go well then you could regret not doing what you wanted to do. Whereas if nothing happens with it, I love it you know so I think that’s what you should do. I think that’s been my favourite part to the overall thing is listening to the album and making all the changes – it has been fun to watch over it all.”

Writing in Jamaica

“I just wanted to not be somewhere that I’d get distracted. It was 360 of writing, you’d go home for dinner, write at the house then go back to the studio. I liked being away from everything and doing it like that.”

About his debut single

“It’s a bit weird, I feel like I’ve been hibernating for so long now and you hear it in the safety of the studio and now it’s time to give birth … it’s the song (debut single) I’m most proud of writing.”

About making it on his own

“I’ve been hibernating trying to get it all ready, that’s been fun, but I like this bit as well. I think it’s gonna be fun, it’s gonna be good. It’s not like I’m travelling on my own now, I have a band and everything and they’re amazing.”

Ed Sheeran

“I played him (Sheeran) a few songs after the album was finished. He didn’t say that he didn’t like any, but he did like one song that isn’t on the album. So I did have a bit of a minute of like hmmm no but…”

On Adele

“I’ve spoken to her a little bit, she knows one of the guys that I wrote it with (his music) a lot. But I don’t think so much advice, I just like how she does stuff. I think she leads by example, she’s the biggest, she’s amazing, she’s the best so she should be the biggest. The thing with her is she’s a different thing, she’s just good at it, I like how she does everything, it looks very nice. For my 21st she gave me one of her albums 21 and said, ‘I did some pretty cool stuff when I was 21, good luck’ and I was like, 'geez’.”

On Dating

“I haven’t dated in a long time really because I went away to do the movie then did the album so I haven’t in a while. I have a couple of candles left still though. 

Whether dating when famous is hard

“I don’t know, maybe. I feel like with all of the stuff how people date now, with all online stuff, I feel like you can do that (Google) with anyone really if you’re looking at someone’s profile before seeing them. It’s kinda the same… No, I used to (research dates), then I said I’m not going to do that anymore, it’s impossible to go in without a perception of someone and you’ve never met them and I started feeling like that was wrong and weird. I think I snore, and also I quite like routine, so I don’t know if I’m ­incredibly spontaneous.”

Cutting his hair for Dunkirk

“I felt very naked for a while. I was like yeah, I’ve gotta shave my hair off. It wasn’t a hard decision, it got made into a wig.”

Why he rarely tweets

“I don’t like saying something for the sake of it.”

Life at home and work

“The first time I went home not wearing trainers, I was in a pair of boots. Someone said, ‘What the bloody hell are they?’ I like to separate working and being at home with family.”

Staying grounded

“It’s easier in the way that I like to separate stuff from working and being at home with family and stuff. When you separate it it’s easier to see it for what it is. When you let it become everything and that’s your whole life, then it’s easy to get a bit lost in it. I’m lucky, I have amazing friends and my family’s amazing so I think they make it easier to keep the separation between the two which makes it easier for me.”

Being nervous about playing his music to others

“I think it’s nerve-racking in that I’ve only played it to like 10 people in a room. I try and not be there if I’m playing it…”

His mother and step-father’s reactions to the album

“I played the album to them the first time and there’s one song that’s got a vocal effect on it, the whole album finished then my stepdad said: ‘I’ve one question, where did you get the duck from, how did you get a duck in the studio?’ I was like: ‘That was me, thanks’. My Mum liked it which was handy. She cried a couple of times which was good, I think that was good.”

Musical Influences

“I think it’s hard to not have influencers from what you grew up listening on. I think everyone reacts differently to different types of music. I had a good range between my mum and dad… my dad listened to Fleetwood, The Beatles, Rolling Stones, Pink Floyd and Queen. My mum was like Norah Jones and Savage Garden. There are a lot of melodies there.”

Being starstruck by other celebrities

“I remember the first time we went to an awards show in the US, we met Will Smith. It was a brief meeting – he was nice and very tall.”

Addressing the rumour about getting a sheep placenta facial

“No I’ve never had a sheep placenta facial.”

Rumours about Hobama

“I’m not allowed to talk about that.”

Rumour on taking his dates on helicopter rides

“No I’ve never done that,” Harry says, with Grimmy responding: “Not even with Barack?”

“No,“ Harry says. “It was his helicopter, haha.”

Talking about Chris Martin

“He’s lovely isn’t he? He is good at telling you to take care of yourself. I think he makes sure you are alright and is very zen. I think he is a pretty wonderful man.”

On Ronnie Wood

“Big fan, I love Ronnie Wood – I think I met him at a dinner party a few years ago and went to a couple of Stones shows…I think he is the nicest.”

Interviewing Paul McCartney for his Another Man issue

“It was amazing – his voice sounds like a song.”

Loving scented candles

“I mean I think everyone loves scented candles. But I usually take one from home if I’m travelling.”

About sprouts being the new kale

“I went two days ago. I got some spinach, eggs, OJ, milk, turkey and some brussels sprouts. Hmm what else did I buy…oh some Crème Eggs. I like putting sprouts in a curry and I like sauteing them. I think they are going to be the new kale. I met [someone] and I asked her what she did and she said ‘I’m the PR lady for Kale’ and I was like ‘good job then.”

Talking about his four nipples

“Still got them, managed to keep them. Maybe I just hide them in limited edition albums, like golden tickets. I’ll hold onto them.”

Best trait

“Best trait I don’t know, it’s weird to pick your best, shall we go with the nipples thing.”

On where not to ask him for a selfie

“I think in toilets is the weirdest one. It’s happened a couple of times… When someone tries to shake your hand right after having a wee, ‘I might wash my hands first’.”

About Liam’s son and being a potential godfather

“I spoke to Liam and he’s loving it. He said it’s going really well and everyone’s great. So I’m very happy for him. I think it’s a roll of the dice, there are a lot of people Liam has in mind. I’m not going to add any extra pressure. If it came my way I would be honoured.”

The moment I started shipping Klance was when

Ha, this is gonna be a little long.

So I was watching Voltron for the first time and on the third episode, I had paused at this exact frame and I was like,

They gonna Lady-and-the-Tramp that shit.

So I kept on playing and they didn’t (spoiler alert), so I kept on watching and after the alarm had started and it was cut back to the guys I NOTICED

LANCE IS EATING SPAGHETTI

HUNK DIDN’T COOK ANY SPAGHETTI

DO YOU SEE ANYTHING THAT LOOKS CLOSE TO SPAGHETTI HERE???

AND DON’T EVEN TRY ME WITH THAT “Well maybe it was underneath the f–” NO

IF HUNK MADE SPAGHETTI, HE WOULD’VE HAD TO MAKE IT FROM SCRATCH CUZ CORAN SURE AS HECK DIDN’T HAVE THAT SHIT BOILING IN A POT SOMEWHERE FOR HUNK TO FIND AND SERVE TO THEM IMMEDIATELY

THE WHOLE REASON HUNK COOKED FOR THEM IS BECAUSE THEY DIDN’T WANT TO EAT CORAN’S “authentic ancient paladin lunch” WHICH WAS ALL HE MADE FOR ALL OF THEM

So if Hunk didn’t cook spaghetti and they just put that in there just to be funny, they could’ve had Lance slurp an alien-looking spaghetti substitute, BUT NO

THEY WENT WITH THE THIN, BEIGE NOODLES

Also, for those who are gonna be like “Well, what if there’s an Arusian food that looks like spaghetti?” To which I would say, “But you do agree that it looks like spaghetti, right?”

“Yeah…?”

“Then the animators wanted us to think that it’s spaghetti and if you pair that spaghetti slurp with that screenshot, then you’re gonna make the connection that its a reference to THIS SCENE

SO IF KLANCE DOESN’T BECOME CANON AT SOME POINT I’M GOING TO BE MAJORLY DISSAPOINTED AND I JUST AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

Love Sick // Arctic Monkeys Songs for the Venus Signs

Did it for The 1975, now enjoy the Arctic Monkeys version! Taken from my favorite albums, “AM” and “Suck It and See.”

Aries venus: She’s Thunderstorms 

I’ve been feeling foolish
You should try it
She came and substituted
The peace and quiet
For acrobatic blood.

Taurus venus: Fireside 

There’s all those places we used to go
And I suspect you already know
But that place on memory lane you liked still looks the same
But something about it’s changed.

Gemini venus: The Hellcat Spangled Shalalala

Just when things are getting complicated in the eye of the storm
She flicks a red-hot revelation off the tip of her tongue
It does a dozen somersaults and it leaves you supercharged
Makes me wanna blow her candles out just to see if you glow in the dark.

Cancer venus: I Wanna Be Yours

If you like your coffee hot
Let me be your coffee pot
You call the shots babe
I just wanna be yours.

Leo venus: Knee Socks

And you were sitting in the corner with the coats all piled high
And I thought you might be mine
In a small world on an exceptionally rainy Tuesday night
In the right place and time.

Virgo venus: Love Is A Laserquest 

Now I can’t think of air without thinking of you
I doubt that comes as a surprise
And I can’t think of anything to dream about
I can’t find anywhere to hide.

Libra venus: No. 1 Party Anthem

She’s a certified mind blower knowing full well that I don’t
I may suggest there’s somewhere from which I might know her
Just to get the ball to roll
Drunken monologues, confused because
It’s not like I’m falling in love I just want you to do me no good.

Scorpio venus: Suck It and See

Your love is like a studded leather headlock
Your kiss, it could put creases in the rain
You’re rarer than a can of dandelion and burdock
And those other girls are just Postmix lemonade.

Sagittarius venus: Why’d You Only Call Me When You’re High?

Now it’s three in the morning,
And I’m trying to change your mind,
Left you multiple missed calls
And to my message you reply.
Why’d you only call me when you’re high?

Capricorn venus: Do I Wanna Know?

I dreamt about you nearly every night this week
How many secrets can you keep?
‘Cause there’s this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow
When I play it on repeat
Until I fall asleep.

Aquarius venus: Reckless Serenade

Illuminations
On a rainy day
When she walks her footsteps sing
A reckless serenade.

Pisces venus: Arabella 

Arabella’s got a seventies head
But she’s a modern lover
It’s an exploration, she’s made of outer space
And her lips are like the galaxy’s edge
And her kiss the colour of a constellation falling into place.

-Admin L

Young girls (and boys) need more heroines like Jyn Erso: complex, messy, morally gray, angry, unsmiling, volatile women who fight and struggle and feel deeply without feeling the need to apologize for it.

We have enough heroines who are cinnamon rolls, too pure for this world and plenty of heroines who are stoic bad-ass archetypes out for revenge or whatever. We need more Jyns: ordinary women in extraordinary circumstances who don’t exist to be likable, who can be angry and wrong and passionate and sad and apathetic and selfish and righteous all in the same story. 

And I say heroines because heroes have plenty of these characters who are admired and loved and understood. There needs to be more heroines like Jyn because there should be no one (or only two) right ways to be. You don’t have to be a virgin or a whore nor a damsel or a warrior. You can be somewhere in between, too. 

How I made $2000 off a meth dealer.

A few years ago I was married to a degenerate tweeker (she wasn’t originally like that, but y'know, meth does what meth does).

I kept interfering with her tweeker lifestyle trying to get her treatment etc and she rewarded my efforts with a restraining order (lied, said I beat her and other overly dramatic stuff).

So, I get kicked out of my place and end up in a studio apartment with nothing but my toothbrush and the clothes I was wearing.

One of her great plans was to get a front for a ton of dope using EVERYTHING OF VALUE WE OWN as collateral.

Drug dealer literally takes everything and puts it in a storage unit somewhere in town. Wife plans to stomp on the dope, sell it and by the weekend be a millionaire (tweeker logic).

Of course, she fucks off the plan and ends up just doing the dope so now all our expensive stuff is in the wind.

I try to work out something with POS drug dealer but he wanted an absurd amount of payback, plus I made some threatening comments he didn’t appreciate so negotiations stalled.

Eventually, I catch wind that he got locked up and that some friends took all HIS property and put it in storage for safekeeping until he got out.

I hit every storage place in town with my story and his picture hoping to catch some kind of break.

Eventually, I find the place. Owner tells me that the unit is going up for auction the next weekend for non-payment. He tells me if I just pay the 3 months back rent that he’d write it up as I won the auction and I can have the unit.

$320 gets slapped on the counter and we go drill the lock.

All my stuff is there! And, whaddaya know, now I own all his stuff free and clear.

And, cuz I’m a nice guy, I dug out all the personal irreplaceable stuff (old photos, important documents, etc), boxed them up and gave them to his mom (found her on Facebook).

Actually made quite a bit of money off the deal selling his shit on Craigslist (came out about $2000 in the black on the deal).

Divorced now, have all my stuff and am happy….

@taylor-tut tHIS IS SO LATE I’M SO SORRY MY FAB FRIENDO! But! It has finally arrived!! I’m sorry if it’s a bit crappy, I like haven’t slept in three days haha

anyhoo, onto the story:


Lance woke up with a sneeze.

He blinked his eyes open, immediately groaning at the light that pierced through his eyeballs and into his temples. He brought an arm up to shield his face, shivering slightly. Taking a deep breath, Lance conducted a mental survey of his condition, assessing his apparently numerous ailments that seem to have manifested overnight.

Congested sinuses that dissolved into a throbbing headache that pulsed outward with each movement? Check. 

Raw, sandpaper throat, and lungs that rattled with every inhale? Check.

The strange sensation of being completely, bone-numbingly cold despite the warmth and clamminess of his limbs? Checkerooni.

Conclusion: Today is gonna suck.

If Lance were to be perfectly honest with himself, he would concede that he had been feeling off these last couple days. Nevertheless, the team needed his 100% right now, and any wooziness he may have felt had to be put on the backburner. With several months having passed without any sign of Shiro, tensions within the castle were palpable.  Keith and Pidge seemed inches away from snapping at any given moment, Allura’s training schedule seemed to have been kicked up the several notches from “very harsh” to “dear god I can taste my own pulse”, and even Hunk and Coran seemed somewhat subdued. It was the least Lance could do to try and keep up, and make sure the other’s stayed optimistic. He was the joker, the sharpshooter - it was his role, no matter how taxing it could be on his own body.

Lance steeled himself, counting down from five, before swinging out of his bed, pausing to lean against the wall as a wave of dizziness washed over him. Once the tilt-a-whirl he usually called a bedroom settled to a soft swaying, Lance began to make his way down to the dining hall.

Keep reading

So very late last night, I stayed up over thinking and I thought about why Even and Mikael weren’t friends anymore and my theory that Even actually stopped the friendship really began to grow on me.

Think about it.

 Even is not a confrontational person. He avoids conflict or any situation that could lead to him explaining anything about his mental illness at any cost.

 He has done it before. The moment he heard Isak’s comment in the locker room he decided to leave Isak. Instead of staying and explaining the situation and when he got back with him, he avoided telling him the truth about it and instead just tip-toed around it. Refusing Sonja’s calls and saying “She thinks she knows me better than myself and sometimes I think she’s right” but never explaining why. Sleeping with Isak instead of having the very important conversation he had set out to have with him.

Even before that, he only told Isak he had a girlfriend when she was standing right in front of them! And in the rave-party, he told a very elaborate lie/joke instead of giving a real explanation to Isak who was pissed at him for never telling him about his girlfriend.

When they were at the pre-game for halloween, he decided to escape while the girls were pre-occupied than to stay and actually put up with them.

His habits of drinking and smoking weed are also things that allude to him wanting to escape reality and just get high.

He even tried it again after O helga natt; trying to run away from Isak but he’s shut down by Isak’s definite Nei! 

So I think it won’t be very out of character to imagine younger Even staying at home after his manic episode at Bakka, refusing to go back to school and ignoring all contact attempts from his friends, deleting his social media and starting with a clean slate somewhere else. 

I’m not trying to make Sonja the villain but it’s possible that she encouraged this too, preferring to be the only shoulder Even has to cry on. Telling his friends off and feeding into Even’s fear that his friends would only hurt him and that they won’t understand him or respect him anymore. 

It could be that seeing his old friends would turn out to be more traumatic for Even than it is for them. They might be shocked and surprised and perhaps happy to finally see him again. 

They might smile and go in for a hug, to tease him and nag about how he left them without saying goodbye.

Meanwhile Even is all *panic mode activated* , trying to find the closest route to escape from!

I do in fact think that would be very in character.

[TRANS] BTS Official Fanclub A.R.M.Y 1st Term - Interview (P5)

(the interview is from 2014)
scan © love_as_hobby
do not repost/screenshot without credit.

Q: How do you relieve those stresses? 

Jungkook: I eat.
Rap Monster: I have to concentrate on something. Sometimes it’s game, sometimes it’s music. “Too Much” was a mixtape that I made putting all of my stresses in, but now come to think of it, it’s really too much just like the title. (laughs) I thought it would be cool putting my stresses into music, but seems like I was wrong. I decided it’s best not to pile up stresses.
Suga: I think my personality changed a lot. Before, I used to show my stresses out. I would show it out with something and then I’m done, but now when I’m stressed, I just flush them all out inside. Actually it’s not like I have a hobby…
Rap Monster: Photos!
Suga: Oh I like taking photos, but it doesn’t make me feel the catharsis and go “Haa~ I love it~ (in a feeling tone”.
All: (laugh and clap hands)
Suga: I said I like cameras but I don’t go “Uahh~ The lens. (admiring)” when taking photos.
Rap Monster: Lens..! 40mm! (cosplaying Suga)
All: (go wild)
Suga: I think I knew how to get less stressed even if I’m stressed now. If I think like “If I do better, the thing that makes me stressed will be gone. Let’s do better,” it won’t stress me out.
Jungkook: Honestly, I’m the type to not really think much. (looking happy)
Rap Monster: Jungkook just bounces it off. Suga-hyung lets it pass by and Jungkook bounces it off.
J-hope: Ting~ Ting~ (making sound effect)
Jungkook: When I’m stressed, I “Euaaa…” and then I’m fine.
Jimin: I still don’t know how to relieve stress. I just pile it all up or stay quiet by myself until something makes me laugh. When I’m like that, (points to Jungkook) sometimes he messes with me and makes me laugh. If I don’t laugh then I continue to stay quiet.
Rap Monster: (points to Hobi) How do you relieve stress? I’m really curious.
J-hope: Me? I’m stressed when a problem comes up, and I can only relieve stress after dealing with that problem. Other than that there’s barely anything that make me stressed.
Rap Monster: You don’t get stressed by trivial things?
J-hope: Uhm… Not really, but when I do, time is the answer. Sometimes I eat something sweet and it’ll be gone. (laughs)
Jimin: (points to V) How about you? I’m really curious how V relieve stress.
V: Me?
Suga:
Doesn’t V do the most? To relieve stress.
V: If I’m stressed, it’ll all show on my face. “I’m not in a good mood today (showing face expression)”, “I’m really stressed (showing face expression)” like this. If I talk to someone, or play games, read webtoons or play games, I would still keep that face.
J-hope: You did a lot but…
V: I tried a lot of things but I still haven’t found any solution.
Jin: I cook something and eat. (laughs)
Rap Monster: You’re still the same. Food!
Jin: But I have to talk about how I relieve stress!
J-hope: This hyung is getting stressed again. He has to go eat something. Wait (points at snacks on the table) quick, give him snacks.
All: (laugh)
Jin: Not this. I have to eat something I make. Or go sleep. Sleep helps relieving 80% of stress.
Jungkook: Really?
Jin: Yeah.
Rap Monster: Sleeping is the best.
J-hope: Everything goes away after sleeping. Jungkook: I get stressed when I sleep.
All: Why?
Jungkook: I can’t sleep.
Suga: Who would believe that.
Jungkook: It strangely takes a lot of effort for me to fall asleep on bed.
Rap Monster: I fall asleep as soon as I lay my head down.
V: Rapmon-hyung snores as soon as he lie down.
Jin: These days I have to wear headphone to sleep because of Rapmon.
Jimin: (excited) Wow! (The snoring) even drills through the headphone. It goes “baaaaakk” like this, I even feel the vibration.
Jin: He snores everyday like a routine.
Rap Monster: So that’s why my throat hurts every time I wake up. Because I snore too hard.
Jimin: I was so surprised. V left the headphone on my bed. I just thought “What the, take care of your stuffs” and put it aside, but then when I slept I realized “Oh that’s why! I need the headphone!” and put it on. But the snoring drilled through the headphone like “dadadadadadadada”!!
Suga: I don’t feel anything. Guess I got used to it.
V: Me too. Nothing.
Jin: My bed is the farthest from Rapmon but it feels like I’m right next to him. But do you know this? Rapmon is really sensitive before sleeping. If I rustle even just a little bit, he would go “Jin-hyung”…
All: (laugh)
Jin: But then he snores as soon as he sleeps.
Suga: We usually share hotel rooms when going abroad or somewhere else right? I want all of us to use one room and let him use a room by himself.
Rap Monster: (embarrassed) Why, because I snore?
J-hope: (points at Rap Monster) You go sleep with manager hyung.
Jungkook: R~ight!
Jin: Exactly!
V: True!
Jungkook: A collaboration.
All: (crack up, especially Jimin)
V: Two top figures.
Suga: It’s my first time seeing such a collaboration.
Jungkook: (showing snoring collaboration)
All: (crack up again)
J-hope: You have to try going through it.
Rap Monster: Someone recorded and let me hear it long ago.
Jimin: It’s really funny. If other people snore, he throws his pillow and bury his face into the blanket.
All: (clapping and laughing)
Jin: If others snore, he wakes them up and tells them to stop sleeping…
Jimin: (about to cry from laughing so hard)
Jungkook: (clapping like a seal)
Suga: Jimin once snored and Rapmon tapped him “Yo, stop snoring” and woke him up, but he himself snored as soon as he lied down.
All: (stomach hurting so bad that laughing is getting hard now)
J-hope: Wow~ you’re really..
Suga: You have no conscience.
Rap Monster: I… did wrong. (laughs shyly) I relieve stress by snoring!
Jimin: If Jungkook’s about to snore, he blocks his nose but you snore right after laying your head down. No not snoring, growling.
Rap Monster: I don’t… (voice getting smaller)
Jungkook: But still luckily I don’t wake up in the middle of sleeping. It’s best to fall asleep first.
Jin: Waking up in the middle of sleeping is the worst… But we only have like 3 hours to sleep, go to sleep from Rapmon first.
All: (shaking heads) Ouh~ We can’t do that!
Jimin: Let me tell you how sensitive Rapmon-hyung is, we can’t even make any noise outside the room. He goes outside and tells us to be quiet.
V: But he sings in the bathroom…
All: (laugh)
Jin: And turning on music…
Rap Monster: I don’t~ Why are you being like this~
All: (having fun teasing Rap Monster)
Suga: Going around vacuuming early in the morning…
Jin: I remember back in trainee days, he suddenly turned on the vacuum early in the morning.
Suga: I was like “Why is he being like this? What is he? When is he gonna turn off that vacuum cleaner?” and was about to go out to say something, then he turned it off. I thought that was the end but…
Jin: He suddenly went showing and singing.
All: (laugh)
Jin: I still remember it was ‘Waiting’ by Yoonha-sunbaenim.
Jimin: (wiping tears and laughing again)
V: (laughing while holding stomach)
Jungkook: (clapping)
J-hope: Really… (laughs)
Rap Monster: Oh my endorphins~
Suga: So I opened the door and shouted “Be quiet!!!!!!!!!!”.
V: It was hilarious.
Jungkook: Why don’t I remember this? Was I sleeping at that time?
Jin: You weren’t there at that time.
Suga: You were in America.
Jungkook: Oh America~
Jimin: That was freaking funny.
Rap Monster: I only snore these days.
Suga: Yeah you don’t do that anymore.
Rap Monster: These days we have a new dark horse. (points to V)
Jungkook: He sleep talks a lot.
All: (copying V)
Suga: But we all got used to it now so it’s no longer a problem.

P1 | P2 | P3 | P4 | P5 | P6

anonymous asked:

ok ok ok, c'est super cracky mais imagine Enjolras qui se lache sur Pour que tu m'aimes encore de Celine Dion. Ne me demande pas pourquoi j'ai cette image dans ma tete mais elle ne veux pas me quitter.

You did it. You made me put up a list together. I hope you’re happy.

Les Amis as French Songs that would Get your Uncle Turnt at a Wedding (or Other Embarrassing Family Events)

Humans are Weird

Just an idea I had for the Humans are Weird tag that seems to be going around. I might write something myself when I have time but want to put it out there to see what others can do with it:

Humans aren’t the only species that can lie, but they are the only ones who can lie well. Here on earth, scientists have proved that intelligent animals are capable of lying but their abilities with deception is somewhere between toddler and six year old. 

So what if aliens only have this poorly developed abilities with deception? They start to develop myths about humans being psychic because they don’t realise their lies are so simple any human can see through them.

On the flip side, humans are so good at lying that they can say anything and spin it so well that the aliens believe them every time. 

Joker imagine: Daddy kink

ifindyourlipssokisssable said:

Could you do an imagine where the reader is J’s girlfriend & she’s cute & needy & heavily into the Daddy kink & it drives him crazy (not able to focus on work) then rough smut happens thxx


Originally posted by fotokopicibierkek

Originally posted by badxbaby

Your P.O.V.

Oh how boring a day could be. J was stuck in his office trying to work as I wandered around the penthouse with absolutely nothing to do. The tv was on, but I gave up trying to find something interesting to watch. Maybe I could talk him through and so we could go out for a drive around the city or something? Being alone was the worst.

‘’Daddy!’’ I whined as soon as I opened his office door.He was sitting on his big leather chair and facing down to some papers. Didn’t even raise his eyes. ‘’Daddy I’m bored’’I told him and walked further into the room. I was wearing his purple button up shirt as my only clothing right now which was something he usually liked.

‘’Go bother Frost or something, I’m busy’’ He mumbled and then grabbed a new paper. I crossed my arms and decided to give this man a break from planning so many crimes. ‘’Come on..We could do something else daddy’’ I winked and leaned against his desk. I knew this was risky, but man I had nothing else to do either. J looked up to me and saw what I was wearing. ‘’Baby girl, daddy is working. I’m coming later’’ He tried to say calmly, but I knew I was getting onto something. 

‘’Ooh that’s a pretty pen’’ I chirped and took his pen from his hand. It was a normal black pen, but I had to get it away from him. ‘’Give it back’’ He demanded and reached out his palm for me. ‘’I don’t think so. You should take a break ‘’ I smiled and then put the pen in the pocket of his shirt that I was wearing. His eyes grew darker and I knew I was pissing him off. 

‘’Y/N I swear to god I need it’’He growled and stood up. Yes. ‘’Come and get it daddy’’ I encouraged him and walked backwards as he came closer. He clenched his jaw and his breathing got husky. He gave me a dark look and then saw a wall nearby. Before I knew it, I was pinned against the wall and J was in front of me. Our eyes met and I saw how full of lust his were. ‘’That’s a start. At least you got your bum off of that chair’’ I chirped happily. He put a finger on my lips and took a deep breath.

‘’I’m really trying to work baby, but you’re making it hard for me’’ J growled with a very serious tone. Just what I wanted to hear. ‘’Sorry. There’s nothing to do so I wanted to come and see you daddy’’ I pouted and then used that one word that always drove him insane. ‘’You know you shouldn’t interrupt me’’ the corners of his mouth curved into a smile. I nodded to let him know that I knew I was breaking the rules.

‘’Such a bad bad girl’’ He whispered darkly and licked his lips. ‘’Sorry daddy’’ I apologized, but I didn’t mean it at all. I knew I was about to get him over the edge. ‘’Careful’’ He warned me and pointed at me with his long finger. ‘’For what?’’  I grinned and then he murmured something under his breath. He was trying to stay calm, but I wasn’t allowing that to happen. ‘’Let’s do something’’ I sighed and pulled his shirt. ‘’You keep misbehaving over and over again. I think someone needs to be punished’’ He suddenly noted and grabbed my wrist. 

Goal achieved.

His eyes darkened and I knew he was angry that I got him away from work. Suddenly he started walking back to the desk and pulled my wrist and forced me to follow him. I tried to contain my excitement as he finally decided to do something. J pushed me against the flat surface and then lifted the hem of the shirt I was wearing so my bum was visible for him.

‘’How many do you think that you deserve, hm?’’ He nearly growled and put his other hand on my back. ‘’I don’t know daddy.. 3?’’ I suggested innocently and fluttered my eyelashes at him. He just chuckled and my suggestion. ‘’You haven’t been that good. I think it’s more like 10′’ He thought out loud and rubbed the skin softly. I knew that his spanks were hard, but I had a weird pain kink, just like the daddy kink that turned us both on.

Then out of the blue he slapped his palm against my ass, making me gasp in surprise. A stinging pain took over, but it was replaced my pleasure. ‘’Count’’ J demanded and then spanked me again. ‘’2′’ I moaned out and held onto the edge of the desk. ‘’Oh..you like this don’t you?’’ He questioned me with a husky voice and slapped my bum cheeks. ‘’3..’’ I whimpered and ignored his question. He was making me extremely wet now. 4..5..6..7..8, all in a row and it made me yell out. My eyes got teary, but I still kept a smile on my face.

‘’Oh you’re such a bad girl Y/N’’ He let me know. ‘’I can’t help it daddy’’ I defended myself and deserved a harder spank, making me groan. ‘’9′’ I muttered and prepared myself for one more. J knew that i got impatient easily. So he waited just to be a damn tease. ‘’You won’t be able to walk tomorrow so you can’t walk in and distract me’’ He warned me with a low voice. Just as I opened my mouth to speak, he spanked me one last time time and caused me to yell out his name.

‘’10′’ I added quickly and then let out a big breath. I heard as he unbuckled his belt, but I didn’t turn to look because I didn’t want to misbehave more. Suddenly he ripped off the shirt from me and threw it somewhere on the floor. ‘’You’re so naughty baby girl..’’ He whispered and then pushed himself into me with no warning. My lips parted and my eyes nearly rolled out of my head from the sudden pleasure.

He put his hands on my waist and then started to pound in and out of my soft wet walls. J held onto me so tightly that I was sure it would leave visible marks. ‘’Yes Daddy!’’ I cried out and gritted my teeth. His movements were rough and harsh, showing no mercy at all. The sudden roughness hurt, but it also felt so good that I wished this bittersweet pleasure would stay forever. 

J grunted in pleasure and thrusted his length so deep I could nearly feel him in my tummy. I could nearly see stars. His hand found my hair and he tugged it a little so I had to lean closer to him with my back, supporting my weigh with my arms. He kept fucking me hard from behind, but soon I felt his lips on my neck. ‘’Are you still bored?’’ he breathed out and smled dirtily. I could barely breathe because I kept moaning and crying out in raw pleasure. My heart was beating faster as adrenaline pumped through my body. ‘’N-No..’’ I stuttered quietly. 

‘’No ,what?’’ He growled and gave me a hard thrust, making my body jump a little and I cursed out a few curse words. ‘’No daddy’’ I let him know and then gulped. It pleased his dirty mind to hear that. An orgasm was forming rapidly and I knew that he wouldn’t stop until he came, not caring about my orgasm. This was my punishment. I’d either be lucky and come at the same time, or then he’d make me come and keep thrusting his big cock in my sensitive cunt, making the pleasure way more intense and overwhelming.

‘’You’re close’’ You whispered and felt my walls pulsing on him. I gritted my teeth and tried to hold back the orgasm that was building up. Knowing J, he’d do anything to make me come now. I wasn’t wrong either. His other hand touched my clit and he started rubbing it roughly, making my legs shake. ‘’Daddy..please I-I can’t-’’ I whimpered quietly ,but it was useless. He was so rough that it brought me over the edge quickly.

My orgasm came without a warning, sending a wave of pleasure through my body. I shut my eyes for a while as I tried to gather myself, but I could feel my juices leaking down my leg. 

Overstimulation.

My legs kept shaking wildly as J fucked my tightened walls. He was moaning deeply and soon I felt his teeth sinking into my shoulder as he bit me. The pleasure was too much. I was moaning uncontrollably and I could barely hold onto the table anymore. 

His thrusts got sloppier and I knew he was close now. ‘’Cum inside me’’ I encouraged him even tho I could barely talk. Only seconds later I felt his cum filling me up, as he came. I breathed out shakily and was allowed to breathe for a moment. J moaned my name which was the sexiest thing I have ever heard. It made me so happy that I was able to make him feel good.

Even tho he was punishing me for being so misbehaving.

J pulled out and I felt how his warm cum ran down my leg along with my arousal. I bit my bottom lip and tried to calm down from the rough sex. I knew for sure that I would be sore tomorrow. ‘’Are you happy now?’’ J asked me and walked in front of me, taking a seat on his chair. His green hair was a mess and his skin was sweaty from fucking me like there was no limit.The after sex-glow suited him. 

‘’Mmhm’’ I mumbled a yes and then tried to stand up, being completely naked in front of him. J had pulled up his pants and he was obviously going to continue working. ‘’How about you take a bath? I’ll join you in five’’ He promised and then grabbed a new pen from his desk. A bath sounded amazing. Ooh especially with a bathbomb.

 ‘’See you then’’ I smiled tiredly and then tried to walk out of his office. I felt his eyes on me as I struggled to walk in a straight line. All I could hear was him laughing at me, but I didn’t mind. It was kinda amusing.

anonymous asked:

MC jokingly puts a gift wrapping bow on her head and tells the RFA that she's their present when they ask her if she got them a present for their birthday how would they react of they weren't dating mc but had a huge crush on her?

Gah. I’m sososo sorry for not writing recently D:

b u t hope you enjoy ^~^

–R.I.


MC as a Birthday Present ♡

Yoosung 

  • (March 12th)
  • Everyone had been busy on his birthday…except you
  • (He was quite bittersweet about it. He was happy to spend time with you but… but… why didn’t anyone make time for him on his birthday?!?!)
  • So you decided to take him out to a LOLOL con, surprising him with tickets– WHICH WERE SUPPOSED TO BE SOLD OUT, SO HE WAS REALLY SHOCKED
  • He almost cried tears of joy when you showed him the tickets upon meeting up, and jumped to hug you reaaaaally tightly
  • …only to realize what he was doing
  • “Wahhh!!! I’m so sorry, MC, I got a bit too excited…” he apologized, his cheeks so red that it rivaled Seven’s hair. He inched away from you, feeling ashamed of himself
  • After all, he was a strong believer in only acting intimately with your significant other!! More importantly… he really, really liked you… It was kinda embarrassing to act so bold…
  • But you laughed it off, and dragged him by the hand to lead him into the convention center
  • There was SO MUCH MERCH
  • all of which he couldn’t buy
  • He hadn’t been prepared for this, after all…
  • You noticed his teary eyes as he stared hopelessly at everything… and ended up buying him a few charms
  • He also spent about half an hour following cosplayers of his favourite character, and you had to push him towards them
  • Needless to say, it wasted a lot of time but hey, whatever, it’s his birthday
  • When it was time to go home, he honestly didn’t wanna go back… He wanted to spend more time with you. Nervously, he asked, “H-hey, MC… wanna come over to my place? B-BUT NOT FOR ANYTHING BAD, it’s just getting late and you shouldn’t go home alone… a-and I want to spend more time with you…”
  • The last of his words came out as a whisper, his hands covering his cheeks in embarrassment
  • He asked so cutely though. Of course you followed him home :D
  • When you reached the apartment, though, he couldn’t unlock the door for some reason, so he ended up asking you to try. As you did, he began to say, “Uhm, thank you for today. It’s really the best gift I’ve ever received…”
  • You paused in your movement, a small laugh escaping your lips. “But that’s not even my gift! Jumin got the tickets… Hmm, I do feel bad I couldn’t properly prepare a present, but…”
  • You took out a gift-wrapping bow and placed it on your head. “But you could have me instead~?” you joked
  • His heart was going W I L D, gosh what are you doing to this poor boy!?!
  • His eyes narrowed with determination as he grasped at your shoulder. “I’d want you,” he said quietly. “That would be the best gift in the worl–”
  • “HEY, HANDS OFF!” The door flung open, revealing a mad, glaring Zen. “I know it’s your birthday, but there’s a limit to how selfish you can be!”
  • Yoosung gaped at the interior of his apartment, decorated with streamers and banners and presents. Jaehee offered a sheepish smile, “Surprise? Well… Zen kind of ruined it…”
  • Yoosung quickly removed his hand from your shoulder, already regretting his bold actions from before. “I-I WASN’T DOING ANYTHING TO MC!!”
  • With an irritated look, Zen crossed his arms intimidatingly, his muscles bulging, a sadistic smile upon his face. “I think it’s time for some birthday punches, don’t you?”

Zen

  • (April 1st)
  • “Do they seriously think we don’t notice them?” Zen sighed, pressing his face into his hands. “Grrr, I thought I’d finally be able to have some alone time with you…”
  • You tilted your head, “Alone time…?”
  • His cheeks flushed red as he tried to cover up his mistake, “N-no! But I mean, it’s just, I’ve hung out with everyone else separately before and uhm, I was just excited to hang out with the new member too?” Despite his acting skills, he found it difficult to act and well, essentially lie, to you…
  • “It’s okay, we can still do whatever you had planned… I’m sure they’ll tire of us soon,” you offered a gentle smile, easing him of his worries. He nodded in consideration of that, and returned the smile.
  • Unfortunately for the both of you, they didn’t get tired of you. In fact, they had somehow managed to prank Zen at every street you guys crossed…
  • There was an entire street that suddenly advertised cats and had cat fur outfits on display, making Zen sneeze the entire time… then there were bouquets of flowers thrown at Zen which wasn’t bad, except that they were wrapped with catnip which attracted seemingly HUNDREDS of cats??! …not to mention random flour flying through the air, landing near the two of you…
  • “They’re such children!” Zen fumed, narrowing his eyes. Despite the glare, he still looked handsome, captivating all the women (and even men) around him. Whispers spread amongst the crowd, and there was suddenly a mob sent after them after someone screamed “It’s Zen the actor!!”
  • (run omg)
  • You spent the entire day running from pranks and fans, finally taking a break in a dark alleyway… wait, dark? The two of you stared up at the stars overhead. Well, that was a birthday wasted.
  • Zen plopped on a trashcan, sighing heavily. “I’m sorry you had to go through that because of me… It must’ve been really annoying for you… ugh, and this had to happen even after you so graciously offered me your entire day to spend with me. I’m so sorry…”
  • He looked so guilty even though it wasn’t his fault, you felt your heart aching for him. Pranks like this happened year after year, the pranks of April Fool’s Day preceding birthday wishes.
  • “Cheer up, Zen! I don’t really have anything to give you right now, but… you can do anything you want with me!” you beamed.
  • He stammered, “W-wait, anything I want…?”
  • Control the beast. Control the beast. COntrolcontrolcontrolcontr-
  • “Yep! If you want someone to clean up your house- since you live alone, or tend to your every need for a day, I’m here!” you said with determination, pointing to yourself.
  • Zen let out a deep breath. Haha, riiight…
  • He buried his face into his hands. Goddammit, you were just too cute.

Jaehee

  • (December 28th)
  • She hadn’t expected anyone to do anything for her birthday O_O
  • “MC, th-thank you for doing this,” she murmured softly, cheeks flushing a light pink as she gazed at you with nothing but gratefulness in her eyes (much to your disappointment, that is)
  • “You don’t have to thank me~” you grinned, swinging an arm around her cheekily. “I love you after  all~”
  • She brought a hand to her lips as she let out a soft chuckle, murmuring to herself quietly, “So this is what it’s like having a best friend… It’s nice to be cared for.”
  • Choosing not to comment on that, you laced your fingers through hers, gently tugging at her hand to drag her towards the train station. “Come on!” you exclaimed with excitement
  • The two of you sat next to each other on the train, your head resting on her shoulder as you shared your music with her, the pair of earbuds connecting the both of you. The train moved quickly towards the mountains, every bump on the tracks causing the two of you to press closer to each other. Although you didn’t mind, a light blush coloured Jaehee’s cheeks
  • She shyly stared at your reflection in the window, watching as you gradually nodded off. She gently stroked your hair, soothing you to sleep…
  • You woke up just in time for your stop, pouting at Jaehee for not waking you up earlier. The two of you arrived near the peak of a mountain just as the sun began to set. 
  • “Waaaahhh, I lost so many hours of being able to talk to you by falling asleep!! Why didn’t you wake me?! I wanted to spend all of your birthday with youuuu…” you groaned. Your cute antics made her laugh, and you found yourself smiling with her, noticing how delighted she looked.
  • Her soft, gentle gaze made you blush a bit, and you quietly walked beside her on the mountain trail. It was a silent walk, albeit not uncomfortable. Soon, you neared the warm red-orange hues of the sun, finding an opening behind the trees.
  • From where the two of you stood, you could see all the way below the mountain… the surrounding forest of colourful leaves, the stream flowing into the glacial lake… all under a pinkish-purple sky with rays of light raining upon the view.
  • It was mesmerizing, and you reached for her hand, grasping it tightly as you admired the natural scenery together…
  • While it only lasted a few minutes, it had been a beautiful experience for both of you.
  • “Thank you, MC… It’s really nice to see something like this, especially since I’m cooped up in the office most of my days. Although, it does make me appreciate today even more… I’m glad I got to experience it with you. Oh… you don’t happen to have another gift, do you? Haha, I feel like I’ve already received so much from you,” Jaehee murmured, blushing slightly.
  • You fidgeted with your fingers, then pointed at the ribbon in your hair. “I actually wore this b-because I don’t really have a gift… all I can offer is myself…” 
  • Although she stared at you with a lost expression, inside, her heart was H A M M E R I N G. Even more than it does for Zen!!
  • Her fingers trembling, she gently pulled you into a hug, thinking to herself, ‘MC’s too cute and innocent… oh, I really don’t want anyone else to see her like this… I just… want her all to myself…’

Jumin

  • (October 5th)
  • Why.
  • The one word repeated itself in your mind over and over again like a mantra, beads of sweat rolling down your face as you tried to maintain a smile.
  • There you were, sitting across from none other than Jumin Han in a high-class… EMPTY banquet hall. He had reserved the entire place just for the two of you.
  • “J-Jumin… today is your birthday… shouldn’t I be treating you?” you asked him nervously, eyes shifting as you felt awkward in the empty vicinity.
  • He cocked his head in confusion, “Am I not allowed to take you out somewhere of my choosing on my birthday?” (sigh, he just doesn’t know how to express that he wants to spend time with you)
  • “Well… when you put it like that…” you frowned, still feeling  extremely awkward and guilty.
  • “Then there’s no problem, is there?” he chuckled in amusement, a brief twinkle in his eyes.
  • Luckily for you, the tension simmered down to nothing as the hours stretched on and the conversation flowed through.
  • The sky was still a fair azure blue when the two of you stepped out, despite the nearing autumn. “Jumin, I still don’t think it’s right that you’re treating me when it’s your birthday… Let me make it up to you, pretty please?” you jut out your lower lip slightly, staring up at him with pleading eyes.
  • “Hm… what do you have in mind?”
  • You smiled in relief, then instructed Driver Kim where to go in whispers, making sure Jumin wouldn’t find out. “Hehe~ It’ll be a quick drive. Put this on, I don’t want you to find out where we’re headed!” You handed him a black blindfold, and his breath hitched.
  • ‘What I wouldn’t give to tie that around MC’s eyes and—‘ he caught himself, shaking off the perverse thought. Instead, he offered a strained smile as he let MC put it on him, shivering slightly from the feeling of her fingers in his hair.
  • The duration of the ride was fairly quiet, as you kept whispering details of the location to Driver Kim. When you led Jumin out of the car, laughter and music found its way to his ears. He furrowed his eyebrows, not quite recognizing these sounds. You finally removed the blindfold from his eyes, allowing him to see the festival you’d brought him to.
  • His eyes widened, “This is…?”
  • “A fireworks festival to celebrate the full moon! It lasts the whole week, and I’m just glad I could bring you here… I just thought it’d be nice to try something new,” you explained, blushing shyly at the end.
  • Jumin felt an overwhelming adoration for you welling up in his chest. He had never been to a (commoner’s) festival before… let alone celebrate his birthday in any other way than a fancy dinner…
  • As excited as you were to drag him around the booths, he ended up dragging you around, his curiosity getting the best of him as he took interest in each stall, feeling amazed by everything.
  • …It was almost sad to see that, by the end of the festival, he still hadn’t won a single thing from any of the game booths. His lips were curled into a permanent pout, eyebrows furrowed in determination to shoot at the stuffed cat.
  • BAM!
  • His mock-bullet flew towards the cat! …and knocked off its bow instead.
  • The old man managing the stall shook his head in pity, “You’ve got some terrible aim there, young lad… Tell ya what, I’ll just give this bow to you. Try again next time, buddy.”
  • Jumin stared at the bow with a frown, wondering what the hell he was even supposed to do with it. He turned his back on it, stomping off like a kid. (Zen: hah, what a sore loser!)
  • You chased after him, grabbing the bow before you left. He seemed to be heading back to the car where Driver Kim was waiting, and you grabbed his arm before he crossed the road. “Jumiiin, it’s the first thing you’ve won from a festival, shouldn’t you cherish it more?”
  • He scoffed, “I have no use for it. Keep it.”
  • “Hmmm. Theeen, since I don’t have a gift for you today…” You clipped the bow to the front of your shirt. “You could have me instead? Hahaha~ Just kiddi-”
  • His face had neared yours in the middle of your sentence, eyes dark with desire at your words.
  • “Don’t make promises you can’t keep, MC…” he said huskily, staring into your eyes like he was about to devour you.
  • Your cheeks flushed red at his words, backing away slightly. At that moment, Driver Kim pulled up to the curb and you just L EA PED inside.
  • Startled, Jumin stares after you, bursting out into laughter. Secretly, he thought to himself, ‘MC never fails to amuse me… If she was mine… would we able to spend time like this all the time? Hm.’

Seven

  • (June 11th)
  • “No.”
  • “Yes.”
  • “I said NO, dammit, don’t get another duck!”
  • Seven pouted as he turned his head towards you, his hands still operating the claw machine. “But MC, all of the prizes are just sooo cute!!”
  • “There’s no difference,” you deadpanned.
  • He gasped, HORRIFIED that you would say that! “This one is smiling! And this one has sunglasses! And this one has its tongue sticking out… and this one has a wink… What do you mean, there’s no difference? I’m disappointed in you, MC, tsk tsk.”
  • Before you could even begin to protest, he winked, “Besides, it’s MY birthday after all. And you’re my slave for the day~”
  • At that, you shut up. How did this happen again?
  • Ah, right. It all started when you had jokingly—ahem, let me say it louder for the redhead in the back, JOKINGLY said that you’d be Seven’s birthday gift.
  • -Flashback-
  • Your bedroom door swung open and CRASHED to the floor, awaking you immediately. “GoOd morning, MC, it’s my BIRTHDAY!” Seven yelled, blowing into a toy trumpet as he waltzed around your room. It was 7 in the morning. jfc seven, NO.
  • Not long after you got dressed, he began pestering you for a gift. Truth to be told, you had no idea that it was his birthday, so you didn’t have anything prepared… (He’s a hacker, he keeps all his personal info to himself! It honestly wasn’t your fault)
  • You rolled your eyes, taking a red pen and drawing a ribbon on your wrist. “Well, you could always have me as your present instead…”
  • His eyes shone, and you already regretted letting those words leave your mouth.
  • Back to present time, you were walking around the arcade, holding all of Seven’s prizes in large bags… 
  • Grumbling, you muttered, “I still don’t know why I have to do this…”
  • He paused in his steps, cocking his head to face you as he smirked, “Would you have preferred to be a different kind of slave for me, hmm, MC~?”
  • Cue the jaw dropping.
  • And the blush ;)
Ecstatic Witchcraft

This is a post a long time in the making, as it is something I’ve wanted to share for a while now, just because it is such an important part of my own craft. There is something truly magical about it and is, for me, something both very humbling and very empowering; as such, it is something that I think is worth sharing.

Foremost, the question to address is: What is ecstatic witchcraft? And one not so easily answered, as there cannot be any one way in which it is performed. It can (I think) be described as a form of trance magic, though its expression is not wholly tied to trance in the traditional sense. In essence, it is a surrendering of self and its simultaneous expression. It is a temporary shedding of the façade one erects to survive, Freud called it the superego and without it, so too falls away the ego. The goal of ecstatic witchcraft – if it can be called a goal – is to allow the id to manifest unencumbered, a means of channeling the primality. Of course, this manifests in innumerable ways and no two sessions would ever be the same, hence why it can be so tricky to pin down precisely.

I’ve found that – and it continues still – that the witchcraft community (predominately) has long perpetuated the notion of control as being paramount to success, and while this may be true to some extent, I believe the converse must also be explored. There is law and there is rigidity, there is correspondence memorization and a lot of book work: and this makes sense! For the last century (and in times before), this has been the main means of information acquisition. While it is not uncommon for witches to join groups, covens, etc., I’m willing to bet that most practicing witches were indoctrinated through solitary study. Again, there is nothing wrong with this, and I, myself, am contributing to this reservoir of written information as I type! But, as I mentioned, while I did my fair share of book work and memorization, the heart of my Craft has always been exploration. Tradition is important, but it’s never been enough for me. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: the best way to learn is to do. There will be mistakes; you will come to conclusions only to find things that defy them; you will learn to correct; you will learn to be skeptical, but not judgmental. You will learn there are a thousand purported ‘right’ ways, and then you will find your own. Nothing is static.

How does this relate then, to ecstatic witchcraft? It is a means by which to connect to that instinct: that intuition that drives us – shedding preconceived notions and allowing the opportunity for exploration through action. And action, I feel, is the root of ecstatic magic.

How To Perform Ecstatic Witchcraft

As I mentioned previously, there is no right way and I can only provide to you a number of facets of expression that are conducive to ecstatic witchcraft. These are by no means the only facets, and as always, I encourage you to explore what works for you.

  • Speak – It may seem counterintuitive to what I have said, for is speech not a construct? It is, but there is power in vocalization, even if speaking unintelligibly. This is an extension of opaque language – or language spoken ceremonially as a means of excluding those who are not privy to the religious tongue – and moves into the realm of glossolalia. Rarely do I include verbal scripts to be read in the things I post, as I find that they detract from the working themselves, instead encouraging those performing to speak what comes. This is a more controlled form of ecstatic witchcraft – bound by intention, time, and often language itself. Here, let all that fall away and simply: Speak.
  • Move – Ecstatic witchcraft, for me, is all about energy: movement, especially. It is best not to go into it with any plan, simply follow where your body takes you. If it says run, run; if it says dance, dance; if it says squat and howl like a wolf, by gods do it! It is for this and many reasons that ecstatic magic should be done in a controlled setting, normally somewhere safe – but I should mention, this need not be done alone! Ecstatic witchcraft can just as easily be done in groups, though it can get a little more dangerous, considering the id is often noted as being the seat of sexuality and aggression. I also recommend putting sharp objects away – you never know what the hype might bring – but hey, sometimes you just really need to throw a knife; perform responsibly.
  • Draw/Write – Admittedly, some of my coolest and most profound sigils have come from ecstatic sessions! There is something in me that always wants to take chalk and just go to town on every surface around – overtaken by mania. Automatic writing is related, in some ways, though often it is used with intent: channeling a specific spirit, deity, etc. Ecstatic magic requires no such formalities, bending to the whims of all and none, the witch is then but an instrument of the spirit: of the cosmos.
  • Laugh – Laughter is powerful.
  • Instruments – If you have at your disposal some musical instruments (I prefer maracas and tambourines), bring them in! And forget what you think you know about music, just roll with it. Hell, if you want to continuously shake a maraca and scream with one foot in the air, do it. Again, it’s all about energy, and instruments bring their own, unique vibes to the table.

Entheogens – *at your own risk; use responsibly* Sure, they might compromise some of the safety, but they also bring an entirely new level of exploration. For some. My use of entheogens in the past have always been hit-or-miss; sometimes they are conducive and other times they are hampering. Know what works for you, and be careful: you don’t want to show up at the nearest E.R. naked, tripping on an unknown substance with a painted face and defiantly shaking a maraca.

Sex – This harkens back to what I said about working in groups, sometimes there is a power in it, and the same can be said for adding sex in. When working with others, always plan for the possibility of sex! Especially with who you invite in, and in regards to safety. I don’t know the last time it was used, but the “It was for ecstatic witchcraft” excuse will not hold up: while it may sound like a damper, J.I.C. consent agreements and activity do’s and don’t’s should always be agreed upon beforehand, and should always be open to amendment. If you really want to, draw a circle: anyone who leaves it is has removed themselves from the session and should not be addressed until they reenter of their own accord.


With that, I hope it is becoming clear what ecstatic witchcraft is (or can be), its benefits and how it isn’t really all that new a concept. It is, for me, a profound experience every time – I come out feeling energized, powerful, but also with a new frame of mind, having shed societal constriction and attuned with both the divine and animalistic parts of myself – if even for a moment. In that it is humbling, and it is empowering.


Photo: Maenads, John Collier 

Hold On (trigger warning)

A/N: I’m in Prague with a friend this week and I put this on schedule so lets hope it works.
Requested to use the line “because I love you, that’s why.” Be aware this has a trigger warning, so think twice before reading. Also, I would love to hear feedback on this because I am honestly so fucking nervous.

Word count: 2,638

Hearing someone you love cry, is probably the worst feeling ever. The worst kind of pain I’ve ever experienced. I felt her pain. Deep in my chest. In every fibre of my body. With every dense heart beat. I felt it. Hearing her desperate sore cries from the other side of the door, it killed me inside. Left me numb and frozen.

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