i just want to not be a pile to shit

Ok so I already head canon that Percy is sort of this enigma at school because he disappears for months on end, has been expelled from multiple previous schools, has weird scars and a tattoo, rarely talks in class, has a brooding resting face and looks like a trouble maker, and is just kinda known as this intimidating guy (but is super friendly if you actually talk to him) etc etc etc.

But I was rereading the Lightning Thief and it suddenly occurred to me that Percy could possibly have this huge rep as someone you definitely don’t want on your shit list and is seen as highly highly intimidating because now all I can imagine is some kid at his high school going “You know, Percy Jackson sounds really really familiar” and looking his name up on google or something and-

“Oh wow he was that kid that went missing with his mom a couple years ago”

“And there was nation wide man-hunt for them and he was all over the news”

“And… he fought a bus driver for control of a bus and… basically just caused this mile-long pile up to get away from his captor… who then exploded the bus”

“…And then this guy exploded the Gateway Arch. The Gateway Arch.

“And holy shit this kid finally got away from this psycho after having a shotgun-to-rifle gun battle in Los Angelos which ended in this huge explosion that destroyed five police cars oh my god”

“and hE WAS TWELVE”

“WHAT”

Why Mom?

Context: I DM for a group consisting of my parents, their friend Rob, and my friend, Liz. They just entered this trippy temple belonging to a goddess I made up called Xasa. She’s CE so naturally I wanted to hit them with some riddles.

DM (me): “You enter a room filled with assorted bone piles. In the center of the room is a large Naga. He l-”

Mom (CG cleric): “What up my Naga!?”

Everyone: *dies laughing*

Me: “Marchessa, as you say that, you feel pain sear through your skull as you take 6 points of psychic damage.”

Mom: “That’s fair.”

Polydads

Also on ao3

Based on a post that @catsforartists made!

—–

When Amanda woke up, she decided to crawl out of bed to get a bowl of cereal. And eat it on the couch, of course.

“Ain’t nothing beat couch cereal.” She declared to the empty room and dug into her delicious and dangerously sugary cereal.

Almost immediately after taking a bite out of her cereal, she heard footsteps coming from her dad’s room, but, when she glanced up, she saw Damien walking by her.

“Good morning, Amanda dear.” Damien greeted.

“Mornin.” Amanda responded. She KNEW it. Her dad and Damien had been getting pretty close, so it wasn’t a completely wild assumption that they would start dating. And, of course, the footsteps she heard must be…

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Perfect

Originally posted by jugheadjones94

Anon requests:can I request a Jughead Jones imagine where the reader moved from Riverdale a few years ago and comes back while the Jason Blossom death mystery (she knows what happened and all even Ms. Grundy) she and Jughead had a past together (like Jughead and Archie liked her and they were bffs but she liked Jug more) and they still love each other and Jughead sees her at school and it hits him that she’s back but he’s dating Betty and Archie still likes her and it pisses off Jug. The ending’s up to you :)

Could you do a Jughead x reader based on Perfect by Ed Sheeran??

Pairing: Jughead x Betty, Archie x Reader, Jughead x Reader

Description: An old childhood crush returns, and of course, drama ensues.

Warnings: none

Word count: 2,208

A/N: wow okay so I totally strayed from the prompts but I’m hoping you like it anyway?? Anyhow, enjoy!


I found a love for me

Darling, just dive right in and follow my lead

Well, I found a girl, beautiful and sweet

Oh, I never knew you were the someone waiting for me

Jughead stood in the school hallway by Betty’s locker, talking and laughing with her.  His eyes almost missed a figure walking past him, but at the last second his gaze flickered to a girl striding down the hallway.  He did a double take as he realized who it was.

“(Y/N)?” he muttered under his breath, interrupting his conversation with Betty.

“What?” Betty asked, looking over her shoulder at the girl who just passed by.  “(Y/N)?  Didn’t she used to live around here or something?”

“Yeah,” he answered, breathless. “Yeah, but then she moved.”

“Well, I guess she’s back,” Betty replied, then steered the conversation back to their previous topic. Jughead nodded and responded to everything Betty said, but he couldn’t help but let his mind wander to the girl who returned to Riverdale.

Jughead was not the only member of (Y/N)’s childhood to be shaken by her return; Archie spotted her roaming the hallways later that day.  His heartbeat started to quicken as the feelings for his childhood crush rushed back to him.

“(Y/N)!” he yelled, following her down the hallway.  She turned around at the call of her name, and when she noticed Archie, she broke out into a grin.

“Archie!” she exclaimed, walking towards him.  “How are you?”

“I’m good,” he answered, and they soon fell in step as they began to walk in the same direction.  “How are you?”

“I’m great,” she beamed.

“So you’re back,” he noted, a smile never leaving his face.  (Y/N) smiled and nodded.

“I am,” she replied.  “Just moved back a few days ago, actually.” The conversation lulled for a moment, neither (Y/N) or Archie knowing what to say.  “So how’s Jughead?” she asked, breaking the silence.

“He’s good,” Archie answered. “He’s got a girlfriend now.”  (Y/N) froze.

“Really?” she questioned, painting a smile on her face.  “Who?”

“Do you remember Betty Cooper?” Archie asked, and (Y/N) nodded.  “He’s dating her.”

“Oh wow,” (Y/N) fake laughed. “Honestly, I always thought she had a thing for you.”

“She did,” Archie shrugged, “but I didn’t feel the same.  She moved on to Jughead, I guess.”  The pair fell into a moment of silence again before the ringing of the school bell broke it.

“Well, I have to get to biology,” (Y/N) said, moving away from Archie.  Before she got too far, Archie called out after her.

“Hey, do you wanna catch up sometime?  Like maybe meet at Pop’s tonight?”  

“Yeah,” (Y/N) smiled.  “Yeah, I’d like that.”

That night, when (Y/N) entered Pop’s, the first face she saw was not Archie.  Rather, it was Jughead, who she had not yet seen since she moved back. Scanning the diner to make sure Archie wasn’t waiting for her, (Y/N) walked towards Jughead’s booth.

“Jughead, hey,” she greeted as she approached his table.  He glanced up from his laptop to see (Y/N) standing over him.

“(Y/N),” he said with wide eyes. He slowly closed his laptop lid, then gestured for her to sit.  “You’re back.”

“Yes,” she nodded, “I am.”  Before Jughead could say anything else, the bell on the door jingled, signaling a new customer had entered.  It was Archie.  “Well,” (Y/N) said, standing up, “that’s my cue to leave.  See you around, Jug.”  Jughead tensed at the use of his old nickname, and he watched as (Y/N) walked over to Archie and sat across from him in a booth.  He felt his blood boil every time she laughed at something he said. Constantly, he reminded himself there was nothing to be jealous of, he had a girlfriend.  Somehow, that only made his longing for (Y/N) worse.

‘Cause we were just kids when we fell in love

Not knowing what it was

Jughead, Archie, and (Y/N) were in third grade.  It was a hot summer day, filled with sticky popsicle hands, grass tickling the bottom of bare feet, and a bright sun radiating an immense amount of heat.  The children were running around in (Y/N)’s backyard with not a care in the world.  Suddenly, (Y/N) tripped and scraped her knee.  She cried out in pain, causing the boys to turn around in shock.

“(Y/N)!” Jughead exclaimed, both him and Archie running over to her side.

“Are you okay?” Archie asked, examining her knee.

“I’m fine,” she pushed both boys away.  “It’s just a scrape.”  This didn’t relieve the concerned looks from either of the boys’ faces, and (Y/N), looking directly at Jughead, repeated that she was fine.  Jughead reached out a hand and helped her up.

None of the children knew it at the time, but one day Jughead and (Y/N) would reflect on this day and realize that at this moment, something in their relationship changed.  There was a shift from friendship to love, and it all started on the day where (Y/N) scraped her knee.

I will not give you up this time

But darling, just kiss me slow, your heart is all I own

And in your eyes you’re holding mine

Archie asked (Y/N) to Pop’s again. And again.  And again.  On the fifth visit, Archie confessed his feelings for (Y/N) and asked if they could call these trips to Pop’s dates.  (Y/N), although deep down she knew her heart belonged to someone else, agreed. Neither of them payed any attention to the slamming of the door at the front.  Jughead had stormed out after hearing the exchange.

“We should have a double date,” Archie suggested to Jughead one day during school.  Jughead rolled his eyes, slamming his locker shut.

“Why?” he questioned and began strolling down the hallway.  Archie followed.

“Because I think it’d be fun,” he answered, oblivious to Jughead’s jealousy.  “I mean we were both super close with (Y/N) when we were younger, and it’s not like her and Betty are strangers.  I think it’d be fun.”  He walked off, leaving Jughead alone to his thoughts.

Jughead weighed the pros and cons of going on this double date.  On the one hand, maybe having Betty and (Y/N) together in the same room as him might help set himself straight.  He was sick of feeling guilty every time he was around Betty.  But on the other hand, he was afraid of seeing (Y/N) with Archie.  Sure, he saw them together at Pop’s all the time, but if both of them were sitting in front of him, he would not be able to look away.  He’d be forced to watch as Archie wrapped his arms around (Y/N), and he’d have to see her laughing at all his jokes.  And the worse part would be that as he sat next to Betty, the only thing he’d be thinking about is how he wished to be in Archie’s place.

Finally, Jughead made up his mind and texted Archie his answer:

Yes.  Let’s do the double date.

The night of the double date arrived, and Jughead was second-guessing his decision.  Maybe this was a bad idea.  Or maybe it’ll be fine.  No, this was an awful idea.

They didn’t do anything fancy for the double date; all four of them agreed that Pop’s was the best place to go.  When Jughead arrived at the diner, the only other person there was (Y/N).  He approached the booth and slid into it across from her.

“Hey,” he greeted.  She smiled.

“Hey, Jug,” she responded. Neither of them said anything else, both of them caught up in their own whirlwind of thoughts.  This is how it should be.  This is how they should be.

“This was a mistake,” Jughead finally said, breaking the tension.  He stood up and began to exit.

“What are you doing?” (Y/N) called out after him.  He stopped and spun on his heel, but he didn’t come back to the table.

“Leaving, (Y/N), I’m leaving,” he answered, his voice sharp.  (Y/N) rolled her eyes.

“I know that, dumbass, I mean why?”

“Because I can’t do this,” he threw his hands up in the air in frustration.  “I can’t sit across from you and watch you be happy with someone else.” Neither (Y/N) or Jughead noticed that Betty and Archie had just entered the diner.

“Why?  You can’t be happy for me?” (Y/N) demanded, stepping a tiny bit closer to Jughead.  He shook his head.

“No, I can’t,” he replied.  “Not when you’re happy with someone else.”  

“Then who do you want me to be happy with?”

“With me, goddammit!” he shouted. (Y/N) froze.

“With you?” she repeated, quieter. Jughead buried his face in his hands.

“Jesus,” he mumbled into his skin, “I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Well since you did,” (Y/N) took a couple more steps closer to Jughead, “why don’t you explain yourself?”

“I’m in love with you, okay?” he shouted, throwing arms up.  “Is that what you wanted to hear?  I have been in love with you since the third grade, and then you fucking left.  So I started dating Betty because I thought she made me happy, and dammit she does make me happy.  But then you came back, you just had to come back.  Now Betty, poor Betty, she doesn’t have a clue.  I still love you, (Y/N), but now you’re dating Archie and this is just a big pile of shit.”  (Y/N) stood there motionless, unable to move.

“Since the third grade?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.  Jughead nodded.

“Jughead,” Betty finally gained the courage to speak.  Her voice caught the attention of both Jughead and (Y/N), causing their focus to snap over to the blonde and the ginger standing in the entrance.

“How much of that did you hear?” Jughead groaned.  Betty smiled sadly.

“All of it.”

“You must hate me,” he said, and Betty shook her head.

“No, Juggie, I don’t hate you. But I do think you should’ve told me how you felt.”  She walked up to him, kissed him on the cheek, and then slowly walked backwards. “I’m not going to keep you from the girl you love.”  She sent him one more sad smile before exiting the diner, leaving Jughead, Archie, and (Y/N).

“Jughead,” Archie started, but Jughead held up his hand to stop him.

“No, Archie, this isn’t about me,” Jughead said.  “It’s about (Y/N).”  Both of the boys turned to face (Y/N), and she couldn’t help but recall that time when she scraped her knee.  That time where both of the boys showed concern for her, but she only appreciated it from one of them.

“(Y/N)?” Archie questioned. “It’s okay if you don’t want to… you know.”  She looked at him sadly.

“Archie,” she began, “I love you. I truly, truly do.”  Jughead deflated at this, and he was about to exit the diner when (Y/N) continued.  “But I can’t lead you on like this.  You’ve been one of my best friends since we were little, and I don’t want anything to ruin that.”  She didn’t have to say anything else, because Archie nodded in understanding.  He hugged (Y/N) tight, and they stood embracing each other in the diner, Jughead watching.  They pulled apart and Archie nodded at Jughead before he, too, left the diner.

Jughead and (Y/N) stood facing each other in the oddly vacant diner.

“So…” (Y/N) drawled.  “You love me?”

Baby, I’m dancing in the dark with you between my arms

Barefoot on the grass, listening to our favorite song

When you said you looked a mess, I whispered underneath my breath

But you heard it, darling, you look perfect tonight

Neither of them had any idea of what to say, so they agreed to go home and meet up again tomorrow.  Both (Y/N) and Jughead stayed awake the whole night, wondering what they were going to say to the other the next day.

That fateful day arrived, and (Y/N) walked into Pop’s, immediately spotting Jughead sitting in a booth.  She approached the booth, and as she neared it, Jughead looked up at the sound of her footsteps.  He smiled.

“Sorry, I’m kind of a mess today,” she laughed, gesturing to her disheveled state.  She was wearing a baggy sweatshirt and a pair of leggings with a small hole in them, and her hair was falling out of its ponytail.

“You look perfect,” he whispered, not intending for her to hear it.  However, he realized he said it too loud when he saw her smile.  She sat down across from him.

“So you love me,” she repeated what he had said yesterday, and Jughead nodded.

“I do,” he replied.  (Y/N) pursed her lips for a moment, her eyebrows furrowed.

“I love you, too,” she finally said, barely above a whisper.

Well I found a woman, stronger than anyone I know

She shares my dreams, I hope that someday I’ll share her home

I found a love, to carry more than just my secrets

To carry love, to carry children of our own

We are still kids, but we’re so in love

Fighting against all odds

I know we’ll be alright this time

Darling, just hold my hand

Be my girl, I’ll be your man

I see my future in your eyes

Unexpected Victory

For some context, in the Campaign I’m DMing we’ve been stuck in a maze of caves in search of a missing child, the party comes across two skeleton Minotaurs which I planned to be mini bosses. The party are very underprepared for the fight.

Bard(ooc): “uh- can I insult the Minotaur?”

Me: “sure, though I’m not sure it’ll do much”

*Bard uses vicious mockery, rolls a Nat 1*

Bard(ooc): “Shit, that’s not good.”

Me: “well, before your impending doom, what did you say to the skeleton?”

Bard: “uh- you have a very… nice… Skeletal structure.”

Me: “… Did you just flirt with the Minotaur?”

Bard(ooc): “I want it so that I failed so hard I accidentally flirted with the skeleton”

Warlock(ooc): “How’d you managed that?”

Bard(ooc): “I am capable of nonsense”

*I roll for wisdom and didn’t beat the mark by a huge gap*

Me: “Well, the Minotaur doesn’t quite understand what you said, but it was flattered anyway. Congrats you just seduced a pile of bones”

Bard(ooc): “Oh shit, well um… Do I have a charisma bonus on her now?”

Me(ooc): “I guess so. Also the other Minotaur was her husband, he is now jealous and wants to kill you, plus he has a strength bonus on you.”

Bard: “Aw shit. Uh- I’m running behind this rock, I’m not moving and no one can tell me otherwise”

Knight: “Help us you coward!”

Bard: “you probably got this!”

*a round passes and it is the Bard’s turn again, the rest of the party are almost dead*

Barbarian: “so our fate rests with the bard?”

Warlock: “Our journey is over.”

Bard: “I convince the skeleton to kill her husband, and then herself”

Me(ooc): “wait what?”

Bard: “you heard me! Don’t question it sky narrator!”

*she rolls 18 persuasion. I roll a 5 wisdom and sigh in defeat*

Me: “She proceeds to decapitate the other skeleton, and then herself. The two collapse in a heap of bones. You’ve won.”

Barbarian(ooc): “you can’t be serious”

Warlock(ooc): “Never thought I’d see the day that ‘Bard’ actually helps us in a fight.”

Knight(ooc): “We won by telling it to go kill itself.”

Bard: “I play my victory song on my sacbutt(trombone)”

*my friend proceeds to pull out her actual trombone and play Final Countdown as me and the rest of the party contemplate life*

Crazy lady lit my buddy's land on fire, so he burned down her world.

Buckle up, this one’s long.

I was visiting a friend who owns and operates a trailer park- basically his house is the main office. A couple had just moved in to a lot with their mobile home. The dude seemed fine, and him and his girlfriend had just had their first kid. Well, at 3 AM just a few hours after I arrived, the boyfriend showed up at my friend’s house (the main office). Apparently, he had a DNA test done, and he found out the kid wasn’t his. So while the girlfriend was still in the hospital he started f*cking around on her to get back at her.

Well, earlier that day, she got released from the hospital, and he refused to go pick her up. So she walked from the hospital to the trailer park (easily 20 miles), and found him f*cking this girl. She went apeshit. She started trashing their tiny mobile home while he and his mistress quickly got their clothes on, and the boyfriend opted to drive the mistress back to her place.

When he got back, his soon to be ex-girlfriend locked him out of their mobile home. So, at 3 AM he showed up at the front office to call the police. My buddy woke me up, filled me in on the situation, and I went out to his living room to keep the dude company. I explained that if the kid isn’t his and he signed the birth certificate, he has 60 days to remove himself from the birth certificate- otherwise he’ll be on the hook for child support. I also explained that while calling the cops is a good idea, they likely won’t be able to remove her from the mobile home since she had established residency.

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Seventeen as things said in Buzzfeed: Unsolved videos pt 7
  • S.Coups: I love bizarre and I love mysterious so I am... titillated
  • Jeonghan: I think you need to learn how to shut the hell up
  • Joshua: where's my holy water?
  • Jun: I'm just saying, if you wanna sit on this mountain of bullshit then you gotta take a whiff every now and then
  • Hoshi: idk. spooky stuff
  • Wonwoo: hey there, demons. It's me, ya boy
  • Woozi: I remember this dumb dumb
  • Dk: *screams like R2D2*
  • Mingyu: I once fell into a pile of bricks when I was a kid
  • The8: oh shit waddup I'm taking a selfie with some demons, yoooo. Hell yeah
  • Seungkwan: I don't want to be a ghost hunter. Do I have to put that on my business card now?
  • Vernon: they don't make serial killer baseball cards, though, do they?
  • Dino: I agree with your calling of bullshit
Stripped - Part 2

Summary: Being a high powered publicist, the reader is hired to work with the destructive rock star Jensen Ackles. Her task is to revamp his difficult image from the ground up. Will the reader succeed? Or will she get sucked into his crazy life? 

Pairing: rockstar!Jensen x Reader

Word Count: 2,429

Part 1

“You must be out of your damn mind, beautiful.” Jensen’s sudden shift in attitude catches you off guard, the smugness oozing out of him gives you goosebumps.

Why does this infuriating man have to be sexy as hell? And why does he have to be your client?! You continue to focus on Jensen who’s now licking his kissable lips and it’s driving you insane. You need to shut this down. Now.

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Snowbound

A/N: This is a repost of an old story that I deleted from my other blog. But it’s wintery so therefore kinda Christmasy? I do intend to write a Christmas one shot at some point.

Oh and it’s smutty…

“Y/N, we should go. The snow’s starting to get heavier.”

“But I’m having so much fun!” You whirled to a stop on your ice skates, in front of your best friend and colleague Spencer Reid.

You’d been driving home from lecturing at a college a few hours away when you’d spotted a deserted frozen lake that just called out to you. It looked beautiful, it had snowed over the last few days and it looked like a winter wonderland Christmas card. In your youth you’d been a budding figure skater until a shattered ankle had put paid to your dreams of pursuing it professionally. You still kept a pair of skates in the trunk of your car in the winter and you’d driven off the main road and found the entrance to the lake, begging Spencer to allow you to skate for a while.

He’d agreed and had found a log to rest on for a while, shoving his hands into his pockets as he watched you with a smile on his face.

You must have been out there for an hour before he called you back, snow starting to fall again quickly and the sun setting in the sky.

“I know you’re having fun, and I’m enjoying watching you. But I’m cold, and it’s getting dark. And we’re still at least two hours away from home. Plus… The snow is coming down pretty quick now.”

It was. You couldn’t skate very fast without feeling the force of the snowflakes against your face. He was right. And he’d been a really good sport about sitting in the cold. You carefully walked over to where he was waiting with your boots and plopped down next to him on the log, swapping your skates for more suitable footwear.

“One day, I will have you out on skates Spencer.”

“Sure you will. Probably on the same day you manage to beat me at chess.” He smiled at his joke and you nudged him playfully.

You trudged through the snow back to the car, your heads down against the falling snow. Now that you’d stopped moving on the ice, you were quickly cooling down.

Spencer dug in his pocket for your keys and pressed the button to release the central locking. Instead of the lights flashing and a bleeping you got nothing.

He pressed the button again.

Nothing.

Okay.

Approaching the drivers side door, you took the keys off him and unlocked the door manually, leaning over and opening his door. You both shut yourselves in away from the cold as you inserted the key into the ignition, turning it to start the engine.

Nothing happened. You and Spencer looked at each other as you tried again, pumping your foot on the gas pedal and jiggling the wheel in case you’d accidentally engaged the steering lock. Still nothing.

“Fuck.” You muttered trying again.

“Y/N. It’s no use. I’m pretty certain the batteries dead.” He pointed to the cigarette lighter which had his phone charger plugged in, his phone still attached. “I’m sorry. I thought I’d disconnected it.”

“SHIT”

“Pop the hood.” Spencer told you and you shot him a look.

“Do you know anything about cars Spencer?”

“I know a lot about a lot of things… Just do it. You might be surprised.”

Sighing, you did as he instructed, grimacing as he opened the door again and moved around to the bonnet. He stood there for a few minutes, bent over and you opened your door calling out to him.

“Anything?”

He dropped the bonnet securing it again, and got back in. “Yeah…. No.”

“So that was a pointless exercise and only ended up letting more cold air in.” You spat out.

“Hey, don’t get mad at me. We all make mistakes and I apologised. You’re the one that wanted to stop remember?”

You guessed he was right. It was both of your faults.

He pulled out his cell and dialed a number from memory, mouthing ‘Triple A’ at you.

You only heard one side of the conversation but it wasn’t sounding good. When he ended the call he shook his head.

“There’s been a huge pile up twenty miles down the road. Caused by the snow. What we’re getting here is just start of it. Apparently there’s a huge storm setting in. There’s no responding vehicle available for at least four hours.”

“You are shitting me.”

“Afraid not.”

“What about Derek? Could he come out?”

As soon as he started talking again, you realised what a stupid question that had been. “We’re still two hours away from home anyway. If there’s been a pile up he’s not gonna be able to get through either unless he goes the long way around. And if the snow is that bad….”

“I get it, I get it. We’re stuck.”

“Yep. They said to leave my cell on and they’ll call as soon as a vehicle is on its way.”

Right. You both switched your phones into ultra power saving, turning off all apps after quickly sending the team a message informing you of the situation in case you were needed. You and Spencer weren’t going anywhere for a while.

Climbing between the seats into the back, you leant over into the trunk and pulled out the emergency sleeping bag you kept in there. It was a bit musty, but nothing too bad. You always kept some emergency things in the trunk after you’d had to spend a full night at the side of a road when you were nineteen. Hopefully this wouldn’t be that long. You unzipped it and spread it out over you and Spencer looked back at it longingly.

“Fine… We can share. Come back here then.”

He struggled to fit between the gap in this seats, cracking his head on the roof of the car and causing you to giggle.

“Not funny, Y/N. Now share the warmth. Do you have anything else back there that could help us out?”

He wriggled next to you and you fit the sleeping bag around you both.

“I’ve got a couple of bottles of water and some protein bars. And some chips.”

“Well at least we won’t starve.”

Ninety minutes passed and you were starting to feel extremely cold. You and Spencer had sipped a bottle of water between you and shared a protein bar. Both of you had eaten a fairly large meal before you’d left for the journey home so you weren’t too worried about going hungry, you were just cold.

You and Spencer had talked for a bit but now you had your head resting on his shoulder, your arms linked together for warmth. You’d both zipped your coats up as high as they’d go and burrowed your head down into your scarves.

You fidgeted, your hands were freezing. You’d left your gloves at home and typically Spencer had misplaced his too.

“You okay?” Reid asked, his breath showing in the air.

“My hands… ”

“Here.” He took them into his and rubbed them, the friction helping a little.

“Spencer, I’m starting to worry. I’m really, really cold.” You told him and he looked down and away for a second.

“I’m not worried as such… But I’m freezing too. Erm… There is one thing… Actually. No. Forget it.”

“Tell me.. If it’ll keep me warm, I’d literally do anything right now.”

He looked unsure and you nudged him. “Spencer. Seriously. I need to get warm.”

“Okay.” He looked around the car and then back at you. “This will probably work better if you sit on my lap. It’s either that, or we collapse the seats.”

“Theres too much crap in the trunk to do that.” You started to shift your weight, getting ready to climb onto him, not even questioning him until he started to unzip his coat, removing it along with his sweater and scarf. As he started to unbutton his shirt you realised why he’d hesitated before telling you.

Body heat.

But it worked better when it was skin on skin.

Fuck it.

Lowering the sleeping bag, you followed suit; removing your coat and outer layers, stopping when you got to your bra. That was staying on.

“Trousers too?” You asked and he nodded, already slipping his off. Again you copied him and when you were both down to your underwear you climbed onto his lap, feeling slightly self conscious.

He shrugged his thick coat back over his shoulders, not putting his arms through the sleeves and you pulled the sleeping bag back around you.

“So…. I guess we snuggle right?”

He nodded, giving you an apologetic look.

Okay. Whatever.

You leant in, pressing your chest against his and resting your head back on his shoulder. Spencers hands went around your back, rubbing up and down your bare skin as you cocooned you both in the thick material.

As uncomfortable as you felt sitting on your colleagues lap, this was tons warmer. You wriggled, shuffling your knees closer to the back of the seat and pressing as close as you could.

“Don’t wriggle. Please.” Spencer sounded choked and his hands gripped your waist.

“Sorry. Just trying to get warmer.”

“I know. But….just don’t.”

“Shit, am I hurting you?” You asked.

“It’s.. not that.”

“Then what?”

He coughed, clearing his throat. “I don’t want to make this awkward because I’m finally starting to feel warm but…. Well. You’re a very attractive female. And you’re on my lap wearing very little.”

Oh.

OH!

Wait.

“You think I’m attractive?”

“I’m not blind, Y/N.”

Huh.

You wriggled again, his fingers digging into your hips this time.

“Stop it.” He hissed at you.

“What if I don’t want to?”

“Y/N. I’m not in the mood to be made a fool out of.”

“What? Spencer, I’m not trying to make a fool out of you. I just find it amusing that you’ve just admitted to finding me attractive and I sure as hell think you’re hot. And like you say, I AM sat in your lap, semi naked.”

You pulled away from his shoulder so you could look at him, grinning at the confused and shocked look on his face.

“W-w-what?”

“You heard. Don’t act so shocked either.”

When you shifted this time, he didn’t grasp you so hard, his hands still on your hips but no longer in a vice like grip.

“You think…. Me? Really?”

“I’m not blind, Spencer.” You echoed his own words.

Thinking quickly you asked him. “Triple A said four hours right?”

He nodded.

“And that they’d call when they were on their way?”

“Yes. Why?”

“I can think of another way to get warm… A lot warmer than this. And a hell of a lot funner than this too. If you’re game?”

He gulped before licking his lips.

“I’m game.” He whispered.

“Excellent.”

Lowering your head to his neck, you started to place gentle kisses up and down, nibbling softly on his ear lobe and rolling your hips lightly. He stopped trying to still your movements and instead started trailing up and down your sides, tickling your skin.

Slowly dragging your lips across his jawbone, his light stubble chafing your lips, you stopped just shy of his mouth.

“Sure you’re game?” You asked once more.

He nodded in response, his lips parting as you placed yours against his.

Oh god..

Your kisses started slow and then quickly built into passionate urgings, your mouths moving against other in a way that you’d never thought you’d be doing with Reid. Sure, you thought Spencer was attractive, and you got on extremely well with him. You’d even go as far to say that you harboured a small crush for him.

You just never thought you’d act on it.

You rolled your hips again hearing him groan, a deliciously low sound that you wanted to hear again and again. Sliding back and forth gently you ground your pelvis against his lap, feeling him hard beneath you, another groan escaping his throat as you kissed.

You repositioned yourself slightly so that you were on the receiving end of the friction you were creating as you rocked your hips to and fro. A gasp caught on your lips and you felt him grin against you mouth.

Feeling bolder, he slid his hands around to your front, palming your breasts through your bra.

It was good job you were in a relatively secluded area, the windows of the car were now completed misted over.

Spencer tugged on your bra straps, sliding them down your arms and reaching behind your back for the clasp. You allowed him to remove it, making sure the sleeping bag was positioned so that if anyone did suddenly appear, you wouldn’t get shopped for publicly indecency.

Reid broke the kiss and pulled back to look at you, his eyes raking over your chest. He breathed in deeply, his eyes darkening.

“Like what you see?” You asked cockily, trying to break some of the tension.

“What’s not to like?” Spencer leant forward and pressed his warm lips to your breastbone, his hands moving over your thighs, sliding higher as you continued to grind gently against him.

“Stop moving for a second.. ” His whispered, his breath tickling your skin as he kissed his way across your chest to your nipple, lightly circling it with his tongue before sucking it into his mouth, flicking your hard bud.

“Oh fuck” You whimpered. You could no longer feel the cold, only the warmth coursing through your body. Spencer sucked harder, his tongue teasing you and sending shivers down your spine straight to your groin. His fingers moved higher up your thighs, stroking against the fabric of your underwear which you were sure had to be wet now.

“Spence… Fuck.”

His thumb grazed over your clit, making you shudder lightly. Realising he was in the right place, he started to rub over the fabric, glancing up at you as he did, biting down softly on your breast.

You started to pant lowly, biting on your bottom lip as Spencer massaged your clit through your panties.

“Oh god….oh sweet fuck… ” You gasped, starting to grind on him again. He moaned loudly biting down harder and you cried out.

“Shit. Too hard?” He pulled away.

“No… But… ” You lifted yourself off him slightly and reached for his boxers. He got the message and raised his hips and slid them down.

Resting back down, you reached between your bodies and pulled your panties to one side, using your hands to position him against your lips.

“Do we….. ?” He asked.

“Pill.” You breathed out, allowing him to slide in slowly, wincing slightly at the new sensation.

“Fuck.” Spencer groaned out.

“Yep.” You agreed and started rocking against him, his hand slipping back between you to resume it’s ministrations on your clit.

Resting your forehead to his, you moved. Rolling your hips against his and clenching around him as jolts of pleasure shot through you. He bucked underneath you, pushing himself deeper inside as you both soon fell into a perfect rhythm with each other.

Spencers fingers kept up their motions on your clit and you slowly felt your orgasm start to build, your legs trembling when it started to overtake you. You started to grind harder and faster on him, his own moans coming faster now. You came a few minutes later, crying out his name as you did. You shuddered on top of him, your thighs clenching as you continued to move up and down, Spencers hands now moving to your hips to help with your pace.

“Oh fuck… I’m gonna… ”

He didn’t need to finish, you felt him releasing himself inside of you in short bursts. You slowed your movements, bringing them to a halt.

“Well…” You breathed out. “I don’t know about you, but I’m a hell of a lot warmer.”

“Same… Almost too warm, not that I’m going to complain.”

Just then, his phone started to sing and you scrambled for it, feeling a warm sticky fluid running down your thighs as he slipped out.

“Sorry….” He said hurriedly, grabbing for his cell and answering it.

It was Triple A. They had a vehicle ready and he was on his way. He’d be about fifteen minutes, they told Spencer.

You hurriedly pulled your clothes back on and wiped down the interior windows so you watch for their arrival.

“Y/N?” Spencer asked, nerves in his voice.

“Hmmmm?”

“Was that…. Was that like a one time thing?”

You glanced back to see him looking away quickly.

“It’s an as many time as you want it to be thing, Spencer. ”

“Okay, good.”

“But Reid? Next time… You really don’t need to break my car. Just ask!”

“I didn’t… I… I… Y/N, I swear…”

You laughed at him, seeing headlights approaching in the distance.

“I know Spencer… I know. ”

Playing on Roll20, I rolled for a random wilderness encounter, so I had to throw some enemies on a map on the fly. This caused some minor technical difficulties and swearing on my end. My players being my players, this went as well as you would expect.

Me (DM): Okay, you see… shit. Ok, just a sec–

Barbarian: Is it a giant pile of shit? Like, Jurassic Park sized? I roll to seduce the pile of shit.

Barbarian: *rolls a nat 19*

Me: Despite it being a giant, non-sentient pile of literal feces, you can tell that this pile of shit *totally* wants to bang you. Like, it thinks YOU are hot shit.

Okay, so I just rewatched The Six Thatchers for the first time since the premiere and I have to beat a dead horse here, so If you want to go down that conspiracy rabbit hole, feel free to continue past the cut (it is an all-encompassing rant). This is your warning, no fair reading on and then getting upset over it and fighting me on my own post – that is not tolerated.

Keep reading

Dating Taehyung would include:

(idk if this is okay)

  • - Random ‘’animals on the street’ snaps
  • - “Babe look at that cat”
  • - “Baby did you see that puppy?”
  • - Waking up to a snoring drooling mess
  • - Deeper than the sea morning voice Tae
  • - Sings you to sleep once in a while
  • - He brings you tea/coffee all the time
  • - Or flowers. But like in pots
  • - “I saw this and and i thought you’d like it”
  • - Always cooking the same 5 recipes because you know them and that way you can fool around w/o fucking up dinner
  • BTS members randomly appearing in your home 
  • - If he’s sad he’ll want you to leave him alone during the day but at night when he climbs into bed he’ll just drop his walls completely
  • - Rapping
  • - Like he be rapping about folding the laundry and shit
  • - Or about dogs
  • - You have a pile of clothes that is the ‘sharing’ pile 
  • - Most socks are sharing socks
  • - Video games 
  • - Cursing each other out like crazy people
  • - You have matching camouflage PJ's 
  • - “Babe where are you??????”
  • - “Where’s that voice coming from????” “OW”
  • - Asks you how you are aaaaall the time
  • - “You sure you’re okay?”
  • - You lose each other when shopping. Every time without fail
  • - “DID YOU SEE THIS?” You echo each other as you show each other the exact same thing
  • - “We’re so cool” 
  • - Doesn’t get angry very often.
  • - Is hot af when he does
  • - Family oriented af
  • - All family events are important events
  • - His cousins hang out w you two a lot
  • - It’s super nice cause Tae plays w them all day and you can make snacks and watch movies w them when they’re all tired out 
  • - Your heart explodes a little the first time they call you auntie 
  • - So does Tae's 

For some context, in the Campaign I’m DMing we’ve been stuck in a maze of caves in search of a missing child, the party comes across two skeleton Minotaurs which I planned to be mini bosses. The party are very underprepared for the fight.

Bard(ooc): “uh- can I insult the Minotaur?”

Me: “sure, though I’m not sure it’ll do much”

*Bard uses vicious mockery, rolls a Nat 1*

Bard(ooc): “Shit, that’s not good.”

Me: “well, before your impending doom, what did you say to the skeleton?”

Bard: “I fine you quite… Humerus.”

Me: “… What?”

Bard(ooc): “I flirt when I panic”

Warlock(ooc): “How do you manage that?”

Bard(ooc): “I am capable of nonsense”

Druid(ooc): “that wasn’t even flirting”

*I roll for wisdom and didn’t beat the mark by a huge gap*

Me: “Well, the Minotaur doesn’t quite understand what you said, but it was flattered anyway. Congrats you just seduced a pile of bones”

Bard(ooc): “Oh shit, well um… Do I have a charisma bonus on her now?”

Me(ooc): “I guess so. Also the other Minotaur was her husband, he is now jealous and wants to kill you, plus he has a strength bonus on you.”

Bard: “Aw shit. Uh- I’m running behind this rock, I’m not moving and no one can tell me otherwise”

Knight: “Help us you coward!”

Bard: “you probably got this!”

*a round passes and it is the Bard’s turn again, the rest of the party are almost dead*

Barbarian: “so our fate rests with the bard?”

Warlock: “Our journey is over.”

Bard: “I convince the skeleton to kill her husband, and then herself”

Me(ooc): “wait what?”

Bard: “you heard me! Don’t question it sky narrator!”

*she rolls 18 persuasion. I roll a 5 wisdom and sigh in defeat*

Me: “She proceeds to decapitate the other skeleton, and then herself. The two collapse in a heap of bones. You’ve won.”

Barbarian(ooc): “you can’t be serious”

Druid(ooc): “Never thought I’d see the day that ‘Bard’ actually helps us in a fight.”

Knight(ooc): “We won by telling it to go kill itself.”

Bard: “I play my victory song on my sacbutt(trombone)”

*my friend proceeds to pull out her actual trombone and play Final Countdown as me and the rest of the party contemplate our life choices*

third wheel [michael m. x reader]

prompt where michael x reader are dating but for some reason jeremy doesnt like the reader and the reader doesnt want to ruin their friendship so they end things and michael just loses it and jeremy sees hes fuked up and then goes to the reader to explain and jeremy and reader are friends and michael and reader are haply and everyone is happy!!! or whateves you wanna do with the prompt just like reader n’ jeremy beef lmao )

omg y e s i l oveit because jeremy. i love jeremy a lot guys

i said this in the tags but the dots at the end are typing dots which is why they’re bold

warnings: 


    Jeremy was looking at you. 

    Not just looking - he was staring you down, and you didn’t really get why at first. The way his gaze lingered on you whenever you’d slide into the seat next to Michael and greet him with a kiss on the cheek, just blinking in the sight of the two of you. The way his grip would tighten around a fork or the strap of his backpack or a pencil when you’d press a quick kiss to Michael’s cheek. The way he’d greet you, voice shaking slightly at your sudden entrance as he said your name as if something was wrong with it and you and what did you do to him what’s wrong. Michael apparently didn’t see it, for he was enamored with you in every way - his hand always slipping into yours without a second thought and pulling you slightly closer so your shoulder would gently bump against his, apparently unable to feel the burning stare into his back - which was always the exact moment you realized Jeremy had been pushed back behind the two of you.

     And it affected everything. The awkward silence between you and Jeremy the moment Michael left the room; the delay in texts when it was just Jeremy asked what Michael was up to when the answer was that he was with you; the fact that Michael asked you if Jeremy seemed different, like someone was telling him what to do when he grew too distant, only for him to suddenly reappear, acting as if everything is alright even though his eyes would never meet yours and he just seemed so damn far away from you - and you noticed how he’d retreat from conversations if you and Michael started taking over with your own couple-y stories.

     So one day you hid in the bathroom during lunch - just as an experiment to see how Jeremy would react. You texted Michael you had something to do for a class before heading upstairs, away from where anyone could find you easily. When you saw Jeremy in the hall later, he was different. He was happier, more sure of what he was saying - the way it was with them before you and Michael started dating. So you started making excuses, either skipping lunch entirely or leaving early or “suddenly” having things to do when the three of you would hang out. Jeremy was happier, Michael got his best friend back in little, subtle ways, and you?

     You were conflicted. Could anyone blame you? Your boyfriend’s best friend didn’t like you-

    Holy shit.

Keep reading

The Rugistry

So my friend was DMing for the first time and made a dungeon on the fly. We had a two people party and were in the first room when:

DM: there is a pile of stuff in the middle of the room, and a tapestry hanging on the wall. It’s not really a tapestry, though, it’s more of a welcome mat with a cat on it.

Me: Okay, I want to check behind the tapestry.

DM: the real tapestry is in the pile.

Me: I meant the rug one.

DM: the rugistry?

Me: yes, I want to check behind the rugistry.

DM: the rugistry has a cat on it and a “fuck you” under it, underneath the rugistry is just stone.

Me: … On our way out I’m going to steal that rugistry.

Later:

Me: aw man, I forgot to steal that rugistry.

STEPHEN  KING’S  ‘THE  BODY’  SENTENCE  STARTERS.
↪  all  taken  from  the  1983  novella. feel  free  to  edit  them  as  you  see  fit,  &  enjoy !

  • “the most important things are the hardest things to say.”
  • “it happened a long time ago… although sometimes it doesn’t seem that long to me.”
  • “you four-eyed pile of shit!”
  • “drop dead in a shed, fred.”
  • “you guys want to go see a dead body?”
  • “my balls crawled up so high i thought they was trying to get back home.”
  • “there used to be a bridge, but there was a flood. a long time ago. now there’s just the train-tracks.”
  • “did you ever hear of such a fucked-up family?”
  • “he’s a real asshole, ain’t he?”
  • “man, you shoulda seen your face. oh man, that was priceless. that was really fine. my fucking-a.“
  • “you know that she thinks wearing glasses would spoil her pretty face.”
  • “besides, it’s spooky sleeping out at night in the woods.”
  • “a train-dodge, dig it? what’s trucks after a fuckin’ train-dodge?”
  • “'i’m gonna kill [him/her/them]. at least give [him/her/them] a fat lip.”
  • “Go anywhere you want, but don’t go here.”
  • “he won’t live to be twice the age he is now.”
  • “i dream about that every now and then.”
  • “don’t call me any of your mother’s pet names.”
  • “i don’t shut up, i grow up. and when i look at you i throw up.”
  • “are you some kinda smartass?”
  • “okay, that’s it. that’s it, that’s the end, i’m gonna kill you.”
  • “let’s get away from this asshole before i puke.”
  • “talk is cheap.”
  • “hey, if i spoiled your good time, i’m sorry.”
  • “jesus christ. what a fuckin’ bedtime story.”
  • “most town names are stupid. you just don’t think so because you’re used to ‘em.“
  • "when you don’t know what happens next, that’s the end.”
  • “no, man. don’t say that. don’t even think that.“
  • “what’s asshole about wanting to be with your friends?”
  • “i know about you and your folks. they don’t give a shit about you.“
  • “but kids lose everything unless somebody looks out for them.”
  • "if your folks are too fucked up to do it then maybe i ought to.”
  • “but kids lose everything unless somebody looks out for them and if your folks are too fucked up to do it then maybe i ought to.”
  • “'cause you’ll just be another wise-guy with shit for brains.”
  • “i know what people think of my family in this town. i know what they think of me and what they expect.”
  • “all they give a fuck about is whether you behaved yourself in grammar school and what the town thinks of your family.“
  • “but maybe I’ll try to work myself up. i don’t know if i could do it, but i might try.“
  • “i want to go someplace where nobody knows me and i don’t have any black marks against me before i start.“
  • “people drag you down.”
  • “i say i wanna go look for it, then i’m gonna go look for it! i wanna see it! i wanna see the ghost! i wanna see it.”
  • “it’s hard to make strangers care about the good things in your life.“
  • “i was thinking of something else, that’s all.”
  • “what am i doin’ here, anyway?”
  • “well what the fuck do you know about this?”
  • “i’ll give you one chance to just blow away. i don’t give a fuck where. Just make like a tree and leave.”
  • “kid, whatever your name is, get ready to reach down your fuckin’ throat the next time you need to pick your nose.”
  • “suck my fat one, you cheap dime-store hood.”
  • “i’m gonna break both [his/her/their] fuckin’ arms.”
  • “you’ll go to jayyy-ail.”
  • “where do you want it, [name]? arm or leg? i can’t pick. you pick for me.”
  • “but i know how you’re going to come out of this, motherfuck.”
  • “you dig me?”
  • “oh, why don’t you go home and fuck your mother some more?”
  • “stick with me, man.”
  • “i’m not going to forget it, if that’s what you’re thinking. this is big time, baby.”
  • “be seeing you.”
  • “maybe he knew this was gonna happen. what a fuckin’ creepshow, i’m sincere.”
  • “you lousy rubber chicken.”
  • “if people ask where we were, we’ll say we went campin’ up on [place name] and got lost.”
  • “well, seeya in school on wednesday. i think i’m gonna sleep until then.”
  • “i’m gonna toot home and see if mom’s got me on the ten most wanted list.”
  • “you bet they’ll tell. but not today or tomorrow, if that’s what you’re worried about. it’ll be a long time before they tell, i think. years, maybe.”
  • “i didn’t think of it just like that. you see through people, [name].”
  • “i’m never gonna get out of this town.”
  • “don’t let me see you around, dipshit.”
  • “do you think they will respect you? they will laugh and call you stupid-fool.”
  • “i didn’t know them. really.”
  • “i’m sorry i couldn’t stay with you, [name], but i had pies in the oven.”
  • “friends come in and out of your life like busboys in a restaurant, did you ever notice that?”
  • “if you go out alone you’re a hero. take somebody else with you and you’re dogpiss.”
  • “fuck gerunds.”
  • “if he had drowned, that part of me would have drowned with him, i think.”
  • “i drove out of town, parked, and cried for [him/her/them]. cried for damn near half an hour, i guess.”
  • “a lot of the critics think what i write is shit.”
  • “my story sounds so much like a fairytale that it’s fucking absurd.”
  • “i wonder if there is really any point in what i’m doing.”
Dorm Bedding 101

Okay, so first things first, if you’re going to splurge on anything in your dorm room, splurge on your bed. Trust me. You’ll be basically spending half of the academic year in it, and therefore snuggly is the way to go. So here are my tips on how to make your bed the snuggliest cloud ever. <3

1. You’re gonna be spending a shit ton of money on your bedding. So don’t decide to throw caution to the wind and forego a mattress protector. BUY A DAMN MATTRESS PROTECTOR. I don’t care if that mattress is brand new or 20 years old, it is dirty and you do not want to tempt fate. Just do yourself a favor and be the cool kid who doesn’t get bed bugs.

2. Next, you’re gonna need a mattress pad. Now, I personally didn’t really splurge on my mattress pad. It’s just a basic one from Target that I got on sale during tax-free weekend, but mainly you need it to keep all of your snuggly bedding from slipping around on that plastic mattress.

3. SPEAKING OF TAX-FREE WEEKEND. If you live in the States, do yourself a favor and go on your college shopping spree on tax-free weekend. The amount of money you will save is ridiculous, so just fight your way into Target and wherever else, grab your shit, and floor it to the cash register.

4. Now, as you sprint through Target with your shades on and the Mission Impossible theme song blaring out of the speakers, grab yourself a super plush mattress topper. Go as thick or thin as you want, although I’d recommend at least two inches for optimal snuggliness.

5. On to sheets! Okay, I’m gonna be honest, I despise Jersey sheets, but apparently they’re a thing for college students, so if you’re into that, go for it. Otherwise, aim for cotton, cotton, cotton. Get two sets of sheets. Believe me, sometime during your college life, you WILL ruin a set, so just save yourself a step and get extras.

6. So this bit is 100% up to your individual preference, but I personally would recommend getting a down alternative comforter (don’t get real down, save the birds, come on guys) in a neutral color. (Mine is white and I keep it pretty clean, but if you’re planning on having a Doritos-and-Pizza buffet on your bed, you might want to go for a darker color.) You can also get a duvet cover if you just really want a froofy floral print on your bed. Don’t get anything too thick or too thin, especially if you live in a place with four seasons; anything that says “all-seasonal” is A+ and 10/10.

7. And finally, pillows! I’d recommend getting two big pillows (I actually have four, because I’m a pillow whore and I have no shame), but any and all throw pillows are up to you. I would try to limit it to two, mayyyybe three small throws, since there’s only so much room on the bed and you don’t want to have to squeeze your body onto two inches of mattress next to your wall of stuffed animals and fandom pillows.

8. Lastly, WASH YOUR FREAKING BEDDING. I do mine every two weeks at least; every week would be ideal, but alas, I have a life. Just please, please, please don’t let your sheets sit and soak for four months in all the gross shit you bring in from outside. You don’t even want to KNOW what kinds of disgusting things build up on your bedding over time. Plus, is there anything better than sleeping in a newly washed and made bed that smells like Hawaiian Mango Breeze and success?


Voilà! Now you have a beautiful, plush, snuggly pile of love waiting for you after classes and studying. You’re welcome.

And to all the precious sunflowers going to college this fall, I wish you all the luck in the world, and don’t forget that even if it’s overwhelming at first, it’ll be okay! And of course, you always have boatloads of studyblrs (including me!) who would love to help you and give you advice whenever you need it.

Originally posted by dream-kittty

Hey staff are you fucking kidding me.

@staff you have the audacity to use the Rainbow LGBT flag as your icon while you block LGBT content from minors. For many people of the young LGBT community this is one of the few places they feel safe in their life (if not the only). When I was younger the LGBT positive attitude here made me feel safe to explore my own sexuality and be who I am and honestly I don’t know where I’d be without it. Depression plagues LGBT youth and young gay kids are twice as likely to consider or commit suicide as their heterosexual counterparts. Support and love is critical for these kids and you just cut them off from that. You best believe there is blood on your hands and if you don’t fucking fix this it will just keep piling on. If you wanted to make this community safer delete all the spam and spam porn blogs that can follow and all but harass the minors you “care” so much about. When I post a selfie I don’t want “sexy inexperienced ebony girls” to like or reblog it THAT is how you make this place safe, not cutting people off from the support they need to get through the day. Get your act together and stop being a homophobic piece of shit.

Yours truly,

Your pissed off neighborhood bi black bitch.