i just want to be able to swim

Nothing truly compares to that sobering feeling when I can manage to pull my head from the clouds and down to reality. I look around, blinking away the fog to realize that I can’t actually see anyone ever managing to fall in love with me. So I’m just left there, stuck with my feet planted in one spot while my fantasies slip through my fingers like dust, my eyes line with tears and I’m completely alone and empty. Maybe the only reason I’ve been able to survive this long is because of all the daydreaming I do. I don’t think I could possibly stand my reality for too long. It is only cold and dark and hollow. No one wants to live in that. So instead I’ll swim in the liquid blue sky and let the soft wisps of clouds froth over my skin and be happy with the illusion that I’m the sort of person who could ever experience love.
—  MC
Beauty and the Beast

Remus Lupin x Reader

Warnings: None

A/N: Not my best writing, I think it’s because lots of people use this song for songfics but it’s not bad I don’t think. I wrote this for @nicolejones412‘s 1k celebration (it’s a bit late due to some difficulties, but all is well now), I hope you all enjoy! And go check Nicole out as well, she’s an amazing writer!

Originally posted by marauderseraimagines

It’s the same story that you’re used to hearing, a story that’s been told so much that nobody can remember when it originated, a story so old that we can only assume it’s as old as time itself.

The pair barely knew each other, they had a few classes and sometimes shared glances and soft, shy smiles in the Great Hall or the library but they rarely spoke to each other unless they were debating something in class. Which is why Remus Lupin was so nervous to actually go up to (Y/N) for a real conversation.
With his friends James, Sirius, and Peter cheering him on from a distance, he took a deep breath to calm his nerves and walked up to the girl sitting on the bench, alone, except for her book. He stood to the side for an awkward moment, hoping she would notice him, but she was too engrossed in her book that

Remus wouldn’t be surprised if the whole school blew up and she just kept on reading. He turned around to abort his mission but his friends were whisper yelling at him, threatening him to turn his ass around and talk to the girl dammit or else there will be no chance of him sleeping in his bed tonight. So he turned back around, took another deep breath, and cleared his throat.


He cleared it again, a little louder this time, and she finally looked up at him, a bit shocked to see him of all people. She never would have expected to see Remus Lupin, the boy with the scars and secrets, one of the school’s best pranksters, and one of the smartest students in their year, standing awkwardly next to her wanting to talk.

“D’you uh-Do you mind if I sit?” His eyes flitted around various parts of her face, taking in all the things, all the tiny details that make up her looks, ending at her eyes, her beautiful (Y/E/C) that he had always admired from afar.

“No! No, not at all,” she said quickly, a bit too quickly maybe, but it was okay because he immediately sat down a bit too eagerly himself as a dorky smile graced his perfectly-imperfect face.

A group of students walking by were utterly confused by the three boys who were all rejoicing quietly, high-fiving and even hugging as they peered around the corner to watch their friend. Those Marauder boys were always a strange bunch, but back to the important story.

The conversation that started out as stiff small talk soon became a captivating debate on books, which ones were hiding its true meaning and which ones were reaching too far, characters that were too perfect to relate to and ones that were too unrealistically broken, and it went on for maybe two hours before they realized just how dark it had actually gotten, meaning they had to bid each other goodbye for the night, but not before she promised to save him a seat at breakfast the following morning so that they could pick up their conversation where they left off. And with a beaming smile set on both their faces, they went their separate ways for the night.

That day changed everything.

It was only in the slightest way, they still shared glances at meals and during study sessions but this time they didn’t turn away when the other one started staring back, they only smiled at each other from across the room until someone’s friends had enough and grabbed their attention back. They still debated in classes but this time there was a more playful vibe to it and soon the other students couldn’t help gossiping about what the possible relationship there was.

It was a bit scary for the both of them when all of a sudden people were expecting them to start dating; neither person was prepared for all the people who voiced their opinions on them getting together (almost all good things) and it did lead to some awkward, blushy conversations, but they never did talk about it together.

This odd bond sitting between friendship and dating went on for a couple of months before Remus laid awake in his bed one night, thinking of how much he truly cared for her and how she seemed to care for him too, and he thought about how, since the Marauders, (Y/N) is the only person he has trusted his secret with. He hadn’t meant to tell her at first, it was after a full moon when he was still absent from classes in order to heal and she came to his room to visit him. She was asking all kinds of questions about how he was feeling, how he got hurt in the first place, and she seemed very suspicious about everything he said and he just cracked under the pressure of her refusing to break eye contact.
She was fine with it, didn’t back away in fear, didn’t call him a monster, didn’t treat him as anything other than her friend Remus who just so happens to have an issue with the full moon. To him he would always be a monster, a beast, but to her he would always be a beautiful mess.

She surprised herself one night when she finished a book she had been reading and her first thought was about Remus. Now that wasn’t the odd part, normally she would think about how she thinks he would enjoy the book or if he was the one who recommended it to her she would think about the debating that would surely come the next morning during breakfast. But what surprised her was how the two main characters, two lovers, reminded her of herself and Remus. She was shocked for a moment, but the shock passed as she continued to think about it. They had always been friends but they both knew that there was something more to it, that they both longed for more. It made sense the more she thought about it. And she was sure he felt the same.

They’ve had their bad, bittersweet moments, everyone does, but they learned to grow from each other. And it only made sense to the both of them that they should end up together just as it made sense for birds to fly and fish to swim and the sun to rise every morning.

There was almost a riot the next morning when Remus and (Y/N) walked in the Great Hall holding hands, the Marauders included, and some people claim to have seen a couple teachers subtly passing money to each other, because the Beauty and the Beast finally got together. 

[ENG Translation] Free! Eternal Summer - Another Story
Bubbling of the Starry Sky (based on the Makoharu Mook Drama)

Audio link from Tsunamayo at soundcloud (thank you for sharing!!)

Makoto: I’m home~ Phew, we had so many emergency call outs today.. I’m so tired… there are so many fire accidents lately. Ooh! I’ve got black soot all over me! *strips* Well then, time for a bath…

Makoto: Phew…

Haruka: What’s up.

Makoto: HUUUUH!? Who are you!? Why are you using the bathtub in my house!? More importantly, how did you get in!?

Haruka: Shut up…

Makoto: EEEEH!! You have a tail! A mer… merman!?

Narration: Free! Eternal Summer - Another Story

Narration: Bubbling of the Starry Sky!

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Made with SoundCloud
Hetalia phobia Headcanons

So I was talking with my sibling about Hetalia and we both began to speak about what it might be like if it were a bit more serious. As we spoke, I brought up a few Headcanons that I had when it came to some of the Nations worst fears and phobias. My sibling though they were rather interesting. So I decided to share them. I’ve always thought that Nations would have phobias based on their pasts and tradition. So I did some research and put together a list of some countries phobias. I don’t have EVERY country of course, but I do have a few.

Originally posted by darkesttrip

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I am not okay 🥀💋✨💔

As much as I loved the Beast (oml don’t get me started, no seriously I won’t be able to stop) there is still apart of me that is so hilariously unrealistically hoping, praying, crying, swimming in my younger self’ dreams of a Beauty and The Beast sequel or short. I just??? Want to see Belle and Adam with a family??? And happy??? And making me jealous??? I don’t know. Too much for my heart to bare. Guess I will have to resort to all the M rated fan fics 🔥🔥🔥✨💋🌹Please hose me down with Holy Water. 💧💦
*** Not to mention just Lefou being the fabulous little quick witted shit that he is. ✨💋🌹❤***

Scars (Hurt pt. 4)

Warnings: pretty smutty in the beginning and a little at the end.

A/N: I’m sad it’s ending but, all good things come to an end. A majority of this is in Peter’s POV. I feel like this is how Peter thinks about love.




I watched the beautiful woman below me, her chest was rising and falling gently as she slept. This was my second time waking up next to her and all I want to do is lock her in a house away from everyone, she would be mine and mine alone. She’d never leave me, I’d never leave her.

“I could do it so simply” I whispered against her hair and ran my fingers along the skin of the thigh that rested atop my legs. [Y/N] was currently pressed against me with her head on my chest and her leg wrapped around me.

I hated her.

I hated what she did to me, the way she laughed at my jokes, the way she smelled, the way she smiled. The way she made me smile, the way she made me laugh, the way she made feel. Especially now as her leg brushed against my hardening member. I just got it down. I groaned at the sensation, waiting for another press, gasping when it came. I let out a whimper as she moved her leg away completely. Only she could get me to whimper. She was so unintentionally sexy.

She rolled onto her back and I listened as her heart rate sped up. She was evil. She looks good enough to eat as her shirt was lifted to the point just below her breasts and her shorts sat dangerously low on her hips. Her lips parted and a moan escaped, I closed my eyes and listened intently. I had to unzip my jeans as they were getting tight. I watched her nipples harden through her top being able to see them even though she wore a bra made it even sexier. I almost felt bad about my hand grasping my aching member. Almost. But I didn’t feel bad, instead I opened my mouth and let a moan escape after she let out another one of her own.

“Peter” she moaned lightly. I wanted to know what she was dreaming about. What was I doing to her in her dreams?  I wanted to do them now. I began pumping myself faster.

“[Y/N]” I whispered and opened my eyes to watch her lips tilt up just slightly.

“Yes,” she moaned in a fever. I was almost over the edge as her heartbeat sped again and she began fidgeting. She was waking up, I held in a groan as I pulled my hand away and manuevered myself back in my pants.

“Nice of you to join the living” I tried to sound calm.

“Oh God. You’re still here?” Her eyes fluttered open as her perfect mouth formed a perfect smile. My heart stopped because for one second I thought she was serious, but that smile gave my heart a restart. She had to be a witch.

“You weren’t saying that a few minutes ago.” I rolled on my side to face her. I held in my wince, painfully aware of my member pressing against my jeans.

“Really? And what could I have possibly said in my sleep?” She placed her hands behind her head, trying to be calm. I could hear her heartbeat though, and it was telling all her secrets.

“Sweetheart, you were just curled up against me like a kitten” a smirk was playing on my lips. “And you were purringvery loudly.” She looked away. I loved doing to her what she did to me.

I was about to continue torturing her when​ my phone rang next to me. I groaned and rolled to answer it, I groaned even louder when I saw that it was Stiles face timing me. I looked at her out of the corner of my eye and she was watching with curious ones of her own. I sat up and leaned my back against the wall.

“Stiles, it’s too early in the morning for me to look at your face” I told him once I answered and his stupid grin was plastered on his face.

“Awe, don’t be that way. Plus it’s like 2 in the afternoon.” His upbeat attitude was irksome. I rolled my eyes and looked at the time. Fucking hell, the time just got away from me when I was with her.

“What do you want?” I sighed.

“We want to come swimming!” Kira jumped in to view.

“No.” I stated simply

“Pleeeaassee? We’ll get Chinese” he begged. He knew I loved the restaurant they went to, they would never tell me the name. I gave in.

“Fine. But, I want a full chow mein to myself.”

“And sesame chicken” Y/N spoke softly next to me but then covered her mouth as eyes widened as she was out of frame.

“And sesame chicken” I told him, looking back to my phone.

“Wait Peter, what was that?” His grin grew too large for his face. “Is that a girl?” I hung up.

“Holy shit that was close.” She sighed in relief. I’d be lying if I said her relief didn’t sting, I didn’t know we were a secret.

“Don’t want them to know about our secret rendezvous?” I quirked my eyebrow and leaned into her. She leaned away and furrowed her own, the scent of worry leaked into my nose as I inhaled. A look she gave me when I was being stupid, when I let an emotion show. How did she always know?

“You’re no secret, Peter.” Her eyes searched my face. “I just think it’d be hard to explain sleeping with each other without actually… sleeping with each other?” She tried to explain. I must have looked better because I didn’t deserve the smile she gave me.

“True. No one would believe that I’d be able to keep my hands off of you.” The way her breath hitched made me want to continue, “Hell, I barely do.” I smirked as she pushed her legs together.

Her phone beeped and she read the text aloud.“‘Hey, meet us at Peter’s in thirty​, we’re going swimming!!!’ Wow, Three exclamation points… Kira’s excited” she laughed lightly and I scoffed.

“How do you propose the whole sleeping not sleeping thing?” I glanced at her “Because you reek of me… Among other things” I had her blushing again as she stood quickly and walked to her dresser.

“Do I really smell that bad?” She mumbled as she rummaged through her clothes. I took the chance to move behind her.

“Sweetheart, you smell absolutely delicious.” I whispered in her ear and took a deep inhale.

“You’re right, I should shower to get your scent off of me.” she walked to the bathroom quickly but not before I could see the smile forming on hers face.

“That’s not really how it works” I called to her.
After [Y/N]’s shower it was my turn and I took a shorter one than her to her surprise. We rushed down the stairs to my car, we realized that we would need to get to my place before them so that I could change and we could come up with a plan. I’d explained to her my scent won’t just wash off, we’d have to go days without physical contact. Something that I never wanted to happen.

“We made it!” She said after I’d run up to my apartment at werewolf speed and changed into shorts.

“Not exactly.” I motioned to myself. “We still smell like each other” I didn’t mind one bit.

“I have an idea” she said after a second and to my surprise and delight, she lifted the white cover up, over her head and smiled. I watched her with hungry eyes. I’m convinced she’s trying to kill me because now all she wore was a, deep red bikini that tied at the sides. I was brought out of my daze when I felt a push on my back. I turned with a raised eyebrow and lowered my defenses when I was met with a mischievous smile and another push, this time I allowed my body to move. Big mistake, suddenly I was submerged in water, I swam to the top and shook out my hair with a glare.

“Seriously? I told you, it doesn’t work like that.” I climbed out of the pool.

“Yeah but, if we look like we’re playing, that’s the alibi.” She grinned. It was a solid plan, better than mine.

“I knew I liked you” I poked her nose and smirked at her before I scooped her into my arms before hopping in the pool with her. What the hell am I doing?

“Shit.” She hissed when we came up for air. She brought her hand to her face and looked at it, I watched her pained expression.

“What happened?” I grabbed her wrist and looked at her hand. There were three claw marks on the back of her hand, claw marks that I left when I told her about my eyes, they softened and I kissed every mark.  "Never again…“ I told her as I held her hand, taking the pain away.

“It’s fine, they’ll be fine” She smiled at me “I’ll just have a few small scars” she pulled her hand away and rubbed her wrist. “Thank you though, it’s like it never happened” her eyes sparkled up at me.

“If it starts hurting again just come to me” I was being drawn in to her, “come to me for anything.” I spoke lowly as I wrapped an arm around her waist and dipped my head to lean my forehead against hers. I groaned when I heard the sputtering of Stiles’s shitty Jeep.

“What?” She questioned breathlessly.

“They’re here” I grumbled and got out of the pool once again she followed. “Showtime” I tilted my head slightly and smiled.

Once I saw Kira and Liam running to the pool I picked Y/N up and spun her before tossing her in once again. She came up for air and I laughed at the look she gave me.

“My payment?” I asked Kira who was already beginning to throw her pool supplies in. I heard Y/N say hi to Liam and begin making her way out of the pool I turned just in time to catch her swimming to the edge and climbing the ladder out of the pool, she pushed her hair back as she walked over to where she could grab a towel.

“She may as well be a Playboy bunny” Lydia spoke behind me. When I turned I saw, Scott, Stiles, Isaac, Lydia and my lovely nephew Derek gaping at her.

“Hey guys!” She looked up and gave the group a wide smile. Her voice must have brought them out of their daze because as soon as she spoke, Stiles, Scott, and Isaac began pushing past each other as they said their collective hellos.

It’s going to be a long day.
I watched as Y/N sat on Derek’s shoulders opposite Kira who sat on Isaac’s. I wanted to feel angry at the fact that someone else was so close to that area of her body but, the happiness she wore made it impossible. I let out a small laugh when she fell into the water after Kira tickled her to get her to fall.

“You’re staring.” Lydia’s voice broke me from my gaze. I took a sip of my drink and stared straight ahead. I could feel her standing next to me, if it wasn’t Y/N, I’d have to say that Lydia was the least annoying person in Scott’s pack. I actually liked her. How could I not? She brought me back to life.

“So is everyone else,” I muttered at the small girl beside me. It was true, they couldn’t keep their eyes off of her. Even now, as she swam to Liam to dunk his head, the boy nearly had a heart attack at the touch. Stiles was watching as he slipped through a straw and Scott sat on the pool chair next to him, trying to avert his eyes to any and everything.

“True but, you’ve been staring for months” she folded her lips. It was true, but it was much more than mere months. I’ve just been getting sloppy.

“So have you, apparently” I placed a smirk on my face. “Anything you want to tell me?” I leaned against the wall next to me.

“Ugh. No thank you, I prefer my men not to crawl out from the depths of hell.” Her tone was light “Besides, you’ve only got eyes for her” She nodded to Y/N, who was currently making her way over to us. “Stop staring Peter, before it’s too late” she walked away, but not before a tilt of her head that landed in Scott and Stiles’s direction. When I followed, my eyes landed on Scott, who was watching Y/N intently.

“Where’s she going?” She furrowed her eyebrows in Lydia’s direction when she reached me.

“Don’t know, couldn’t care less” I took a drink.

“Rude.” She giggled.

“You having fun?” I didn’t want to waste my time with her talking about anyone else.

“I’d be having a lot more if you’d join in on the festivities” she looked at me with big eyes. She pulled out the big guns fast, usually she saved this look for when I didn’t participate in birthday parties.

“What? I was just talking to Lydia” was that whiney tone really me? God she turned me into a big ball of mush. She kept looking. “Okay, if you want me that badly… Push me in” I smirked and walked to the pool, stopping just before the edge.

Much to my surprise, I felt her warm thighs wrap around me from behind and her arms were wrapped around my neck as I fell into the pool with her on my back. When I came up for air, I was immediately dunked back under. The second time I came up I was met with melodic laughter and a beautiful smile. I matched both with some of my own.

“See? Fun.” She said once her laughter died down.

“Yeah. Trying to kill me is everyone’s favorite pastime” I rolled my eyes and she laughed once again.

“If I was trying to kill you, you’d know” it was her turn to roll her eyes. We were interrupted when Liam did a cannonball. ‘Fun’ she mouthed as she swam away and Kira gathered the courage to splash me.

After a while I began enjoying myself, much to my dismay. Stiles and Isaac had double teamed me in a water gun fight and Lydia had to come ‘Save me’. I swam to the edge of the pool and leaned against the edge, my elbows resting on either side of me. I would love to say that I didn’t notice when her legs started dangling in the water next to me, but I was painfully aware of everything she did. We sat quietly for a while, watching everyone, we didn’t speak to each other until, she placed a hand on one of my biceps and squeezed lightly.

“Does it hurt?” I asked, shocked at the sudden sensation. My hand instinctively resting on hers.

“Not at all.”  She bit her lip softly.


Peter’s fingers felt warm against yours as you sat with each other. The sun had gone down by now and all the wolves were getting much rowdier. You couldn’t keep your eyes off of him all day, and it’s not because he was shirtless. It’s funny how you never realized how much you looked at him before. But now, you may as well have it plastered on your forehead. Your thoughts broke when Peter let go of your hand.

“Y/N?” Scott spoke up next to you. You jumped just a little and looked up at him.

“Scott?” You mocked his tone and smiled at him.

“Can we talk?” He looked serious. You furrowed your brows and stood.

“Yeah, you okay?” You took a glance at Peter but, he was already swimming away. You took the towel that Scott handed you and wrapped it around yourself as you began walking towards the parking lot.

“I thought you weren’t sleeping with Peter” he told you once you’d reached Stiles’s Jeep.

“I’m not we-” you began.

“Don’t lie to me” his eyes flashed red for a second, you backed away. Scott didn’t notice, “I can smell you right here. I can smell you over where his car his. You practically live here. I’ve been smelling you here for over six months. I bet if we left for your apartment I’d smell him there, too.” he crossed his arms.

“ If you must know. He spent the night at mine last night and I have clothes left here because I forget them and-” you stopped short realizing how bad this sounds. “Look Scott, I don’t have to explain myself to you. And I definitely don’t have to explain what goes down in my nether regions” you glared at him, tired of the third degree.

“You do if I think you’re in danger! Being alone with Peter is the last thing you want to do.” Scott said in a huff.

“And how would you know, Scott? Maybe all the smelling you’ve been doing is taking up your ability to listen to reason. I mean come on, we’re standing in a parking lot, dripping wet. We look fuckin’ crazy!” You spread your arms to show the scene around you.

“You don’t understand” he started.

“No, you don’t understand. Is it so hard to think that not everyone is shitting on Peter? That he actually cares about us? He risks his life just as much as the rest of you! You’re at his house right now. Listen, Scott, you’re not his alpha, and you’re definitely not mine. so you can flash your little eyes all you want, but it’s not going to stop me from being an adult.” You rolled your eyes. You knew that hurt him a little but, it hurt you that he didn’t believe you.

You began to walk away but Scott grabbed your wrist and pulled you against his chest. “This isn’t about Peter” he said softly. Before he pressed his lips to yours, you kissed back for one second before stopping. The kiss that he was trying to give you would have been dubbed passionate if they were the right lips. He pulled away when he noticed you’d stopped kissing back. “What’s wrong?“he dropped his hold on you.

"Maybe before, Scott…” You began. It was true, you’d had a crush on Scott for a while but that ended a long time ago. You kissed his cheek and squeezed his arm. “You’re an amazing friend…But, you’re not him” you shrugged and made your way back to the pool.

It was time to tell him everything you’d been feeling since the night at Derek’s loft. Even before then, you’d noticed Peter’s eyes on you more often than not. That made you curious, and you found yourself watching him. The friendship that you and Peter had was much more than that, you didn’t want to admit that you developed feelings for him. Much more than any crush.

“The other night was incredible, Peter” The woman said. Peter? Not Peter Hale. You rounded the corner slowly and saw Peter leaning against the wall standing over a woman with incredibly dark haired woman with long legs, she looked to be in her mid 40’s, she still had a youthful glow to her, maybe it was the Botox. Then other night? Seriously.

“Maybe we should do it again sometime” He leaned down to her shoulder. A rage came over you.

“Yeah. Maybe you should” you said as you passed him, bumping his shoulder as you did. You’re pretty sure it hurt you more than him. You walked over to grab your purse and your keys, you looked at your keyring and got a look of determination in your eyes. You made your way inside to the elevator and pressed Peter’s floor. You saw him begin making his way to the elevator just as the doors closed.

“What the hell are you doing?” He said once you reached his door.

“How’d you get up here?” You looked at him accusingly

“I took the stairs” he look at you quizzically. You sighed. Of course he did. You ignored him and began unlocking the door.
“Better question is, why do you have a key to my house?” He didn’t stop you as you opened the door, just followed you.

“Was a dare.” You mumbled curtly, remembering that time that you’d been dared to steal Peter’s keys, he’d had to stay at Derek’s for a few days because he was locked out.

“Original question: What are you doing?” Amusement danced in his eyes, it pissed you off that he thought this was funny. You were still reeling from your confrontation with Scott so it made you extremely irritated. You ignored him as you began searching through his dresser, he grabbed your wrist. “What. Are. You. Doing?” He glared.

“I’m here to take my clothes out of your creepy shrine.” You seethed at him once you ripped your wrist from his hand. “Don’t worry, you can go back to your housewife, I won’t steal anything” His eyebrows furrowed and he looked hurt, you went back to searching because you didn’t think that you’d ever cause that look in his eyes.

You started pulling your clothes out once you found them and you heard his breathing get heavy behind you. He grabbed you by the waist and pushed you against the wall, both your wrists were held above your head. “Why are you so mad” he growled, his fangs were out and that should have terrified you but, you weren’t afraid.

“Let me go.” You tried to move your wrists from his grasp to no avail, ignoring the fact that your heart was picking up in pace at his proximity.

“No. Tell me why, now.” His patience was running out.

“I can’t believe you’re sleeping with some married woman with boobs so fake that you could use them as floating devices.” You huffed, looking away from him. “I can’t believe you want to do it again.” You mumbled.

“That’s a crock of bullshit!” He yelled, his fangs retreating. “What? Am I supposed to tell you about my nighttime activities? Is it in the best friend clause?” He narrowed his eyes as he spoke sarcastically.

“No, I just think you can do better” you narrowed your eyes back. He let go and backed away. He let out a low chuckle as his eyes raked your body. It was terrifying.

“You’re jealous.” He shook his head as if trying to wrap his mind around it. “You don’t get to be jealous. And you don’t get to react like this when you’re jealous for the first time.”

“I’m not jealous.” You finally pushed yourself off the wall.

“I can smell it on you.” He said through gritted teeth. “You think it’s fair for you to be jealous right now? Because I’m sleeping with someone? I’ve had to watch you go on shitty dates for over a year. I was literally in your bed last night because you didn’t get laid.” He said so harshly that it made you wince.  "But now you’re mad that I did?!“ You started to leave but his frame blocked the door.

"I’m not. jealous.” You repeated, trying to sound honest.

“Now you’re lying to me. You’re lying to yourself. I see the way you respond to me, how you have to stop short everytime you think we’re going too far.” He crossed his arms over his chest.

“Yes fine. I’m jealous, okay? I know I don’t have a right to be but, I am. I don’t understand why. I don’t understand anything when it comes to you.” You walked closer to him. “But don’t think I don’t notice you stop short, too. You tease and tease but you’re never ready to seal the deal.” You huffed and it was Peter’s turn to look away.

“Because I don’t deserve you. What happens if you fall in love with me too and I hurt you? You think that I’ll be able to live with myself? You think that I’ll let anyone else live?” His eyes flashed blue once they were looking at you. “Every day with you is torture.” You furrowed your brows. “I am so attuned to you it’s debilitating. I hear your voice when it’s 50 feet away, I smell your scent everytime I breathe, I smell your hate, your love, jealousy, passion. Everything. I don’t keep your clothes here because I’m nice they’re here because I need to remind myself that I don’t deserve you. I do it all to remind myself of that. I would have been fine, torturing myself every single day. But then you had to go and decide to be my 'best friend’. I’m not in the market for friendship but, I’d do anything for you.” He was breathing like he’d just run 10 miles.

“You love me?” You said once he was finished. He gave you a look that said seriously? “I heard everything else but… You love me?” You put your hand on his shoulder.

“Sweetheart, I’m in the 'love you so much I’ll go crazy if I don’t spend every second of the day with you’ kind of love.” He admitted, looking you in the eyes. Your heart skipped a beat.

“If you can hear me from 50 feet, how come you didn’t hear what I said to Scott?” You said softly, changing the subject. Peter Hale couldn’t love you, could he?

“Now you’re mad at me for not listening to your conversations?” His voice was light and a small smile was on his face. “Shut up and let me kiss you.” He said before scooping you in his arms and pressing his lips against yours.

It had been a week since you felt his lips against yours but, it felt like a lifetime. He pushed his tongue into your mouth quickly and you fought a losing battle for dominance. Your wrapped you legs around his waist and moaned when you felt his member against you, through your bikini bottoms. He moaned at the same sensation.

Suddenly you were atop the dresser with Peter stood between your legs, his mouth was on yours in a fierce heat, there was lip biting and hair pulling. The kiss didn’t stop until you needed air and even then his lips were on your neck, your shoulder, down the middle of your chest. You pulled his swim trunks down and blushed as you felt the size of his member. He wasn’t lying. A moan escaped your lips as he bit down on your collarbone and pulled the strings to your bikini top. He massaged his hand on one of your breasts as the top fell.

“Peter…” You moaned and ran your hands through his hair.

“I swear to God, if you say 'we can’t’. Someone’s dieing tonight.” He said against the skin of your breasts. You giggled lightly but, it turned into a moan as Peter bit your nipple softly before taking it into his mouth.

“I was going… to say let’s… go to the bed” you said, trying to catch your breath. He pulled away and smirked.

“Oh no no no, Sweetheart. I said no beds for our first time” he pulled your bottoms off. “I’m keeping that promise.” He began attacking your lips once more.

“No beds, huh?” You said as you stretched out on Peter’s bed. You watched as Peter tugged a shirt over his head, already having put on sweats.

“I said first time. No one said anything about round two and three.” He smirked at you and crawled into the bed.

“You really love me, huh?” You bit your lip once he came to hover above you.

“I do.” He nodded firmly before giving you a soft slow kiss. “I love you. I love you. I love you. I’ll say it as many times as you need for you to believe it.” He kissed you between 'i love yous’. You didn’t know how to feel, you definitely felt more for this man than any other but, love? “You don’t have to say it back. Not until you’re ready” Hurt showed through his eyes for a fleeting second before he said “You’ll say it back soon enough. I’ll make sure of it.” Peter meant it to be romantic but, it came out menacing and you couldn’t help but smile at the promise.

“I know you will.” You smiled up at him. You would make it your goal for him to never have that look in his eye again. “You still have that Chinese food?” You blushed out after your stomach rumbled lightly. He rolled his eyes and kissed your forehead before climbing off the bed.

“I knew you were just using me for the Chinese.” He smiled.

“Of course I am. Why else would I be here?” You said like it was the most obvious thing in the world, you both were laughing before Peter made his way out the door.

“Tell Scott that if he ever kisses you again. I’ll become the new Alpha” he growled and went to get the food.

i’m posting this v late but it’s okay. anyway maddie @baratiepromise happy (still late) birthday you’re cute and ily, i showed you this already but now it is here. i’ll do the other part at. some later time. when i’m not on vacation and away from wifi almost constantly. here’s the zl cuddles you have requested

Cocoyashi Hospital:

Luffy had lost of how long it’d been since he last saw Zoro awake, so watching him start to stir is a welcome sight. He couldn’t sit up, not with that wound of his on his chest, but he could still open his eyes. As soon as he did, Luffy hopped off the bed next to Zoro’s and sat down by Zoro’s side.

“‘Never lose again,’ huh?” Luffy asked. His voice was a bit quieter than usual, he’d gotten used to the silence around them. It was already dark, so the hospital was empty except the two of them. The party was meant to last the whole day, and most of the doctors had left to go home already. Zoro looked him over, checking for bandages or new scars. Upon finding none, he looked to Luffy’s face.

“Can’t be the World’s Greatest Swordsman if I lose too many fights, can I?” Zoro asked. He tried to sit up despite the wound on his chest, only to find it a lot less painful if he lied down. Luffy hadn’t noticed his attempt to sit up, or if he had he ignored it.

“You’ve been out for a while,” Luffy said, “Everyone else is out of the hospital now, they’re all pretty much recovered. The town’s throwing a party.”

Zoro nodded. He’d been wondering about how everyone else was doing, before he’d passed out. He was sure that if he was fine, they would be, but the confirmation was still nice.

“What’re you still doing here if they’re throwing a party out there?” Zoro asked. “I’d have thought you’d be all over that.”

“I wanted to make sure Zoro was okay,” Luffy said, as if it were obvious. He poked a finger to Zoro’s chest, where several feet of bandages were wrapped around his chest to cover the newly forming scar. “Sanji told me Zoro was trying to jump into the water after me even though he was all beat up.”

“I wasn’t going to just let you drown,” Zoro explained.

“And there were lots of fishmen who would’ve been able to swim faster and fight better than him in the water,” Luffy continued “making going after me a suicide mission. But Zoro still kept trying to jump in after me anyway, even though there was no way he could’ve made it to me. Why?”

“I just told you. I wasn’t going to let you drown.” Zoro repeated. “If it were somehow reversed, you would’ve done the same.”

“I can’t swim,” Luffy said, though he knew he would’ve tried.

“I know. But if I were captured by some pirate and trapped like that so I couldn’t move, you’d risk it all to save me, wouldn’t you?” Zoro asked.

“Of course,” Luffy nodded, with no hesitation. There was no reason to hesitate. Zoro was his swordsman, his crew mate, and his friend. If Zoro’s life was on the line, Luffy would stop at nothing to bring him to safety or to die trying. “Then you understand why,” Zoro shrugged.

“I guess I do.” Luffy said, lying down on the bed by Zoro. Because of the limited space, he had to lie down on his side, electing to face Zoro rather than turn away. Zoro paused a moment, hesitating, before picking up an arm and putting it around Luffy, looping it behind his back and to pull him near. Luffy practically suctioned himself to Zoro’s side immediately, never one to shy away from physical contact. He rested his head on Zoro’s shoulder, an arm over Zoro’s chest. Zoro looked to his face, figuring the return of contact meant he was comfortable, and was satisfied.

“The doctor said Zoro’s wounds were really bad,” Luffy said “I could’ve told that from watching Zoro get them, though. I thought he was a goner for sure.”

“You have that little faith in me?” Zoro asked “I’m a little stronger than your average human, you know.”

The look in his eyes as he grinned at Luffy hinted at something, a joke only Zoro was in on, but whatever it was, he wasn’t inclined to tell Luffy just yet.

“Can’t be World’s Greatest with average strength,” Luffy said “I don’t have to worry about that, though. Zoro’s already far from average.”

“Far from the best, too,” Zoro said, more somber now. “Might as well be the weakest in the world with that difference in strength.”

“Zoro will get there,” Luffy said “He’s got a whole ocean. I already know he’ll do it.”

“You have to get there, too,” Zoro said “Pirate King is just about the only dream harder than World’s Greatest Swordsman. You have more work ahead of you than I do.”

“And I’ll do it,” Luffy confirmed.

“I know,” Zoro said. There hadn’t been a doubt in Zoro’s mind since day one. “You don’t have to sit in here with me, you know. You can go out and party with the rest of the town.”

“What, does Zoro not want my company?” Luffy asked. “I like being with him.”

“If you say so,” Zoro said, moving his other arm to reach over to Luffy. He couldn’t get very far, not totally able to move his chest yet, so Luffy closed to distance by reaching the rest of the short distance and grabbing his hand.

“I do,” Luffy assured him, closing his eyes. He hadn’t slept much, waiting for Zoro to wake up. “Zoro’s supposed to rest a lot more, so his injuries will heal. And the party’s continue till tomorrow.”

“You want to sleep?” Zoro asked, the beginnings of a grin on his face. Luffy nodded against him.

“Zoro and I can go join the party tomorrow,” Luffy said. “Right now I just want to spend time with him.”

“Then we’ll sleep,” Zoro said, closing his eyes as well. “See you tomorrow, Captain.”

Steven Universe

You can lynch me all you want but I will raise this question: Do kids really need to exposed to be to homosexuality?

I’m just asking because I really like this show but I feel that I can’t enjoy the story enough because everything has to be about this LGBT topic when the story is about something else. It’s just like when I started on Hetalia all over again but at least Hetalia is seinen anime/manga (aka for adult men) and it isn’t really yaoi, just a yaoi fangirl-magnet. Plus not everyone is comfortable with this, as shown with what happened with the UK edits.

Is one homophobic/wrong for thinking that kids shouldn’t be thinking about sexuality? There is time for everything. For kids, this should be a period for cartoons and sweets and having fun. They can worry about real-life issues later in their lives. Imo, maybe this kind of show would even be fine for teens who are discovering their sexuality and you want to tell them that it’s OK if they find attraction to the same sex but cartoons are things that really young children could be exposed to. And you can’t blame parents on this because parents will want to assume that cartoons on CN that aren’t Adult Swim are meant to be for children.

Also, I mostly feel like Steven Universe is restrained by its “children’s show” status more than anything. Just to make a statement, these guys have created a show that will need to “get crap past the radar” to have its message. And they have for the most part, but I really feel that it could have been more explicit if it wasn’t a “children’s show”.

If this was an adult’s show, it would be able to show its content without worrying about the censors and be more explicit. And not just about the LGBT stuff, about the show in general. It would have been pretty revolutionary as an adult show too because adult animation is mostly known for vulgar humor and lack of a storyline like with Family Guy and South Park.

Just saying.

If you are going to comment on this or reblog and reply, please don’t be rude. I wasn’t trying to be rude. Was I rude? You can tell me if I was rude. I really wasn’t trying to be rude.

EXO react to teaching their child to swim (analysis)

Hi~ Hope you don’t mind, but I thought this would be more fitting for an analysis. Thanks for your support! Much love from the U.S! <3 

Xiumin: He gently keeps hold of his little boy, allowing him to become accustomed to the feeling of wadding through the water. Minseok wouldn’t be able to conceal his proud beams as his little boy deftly paddles through the pool inflatable tube around his tiny body and all. Proudly clapping, Minseok wouldn’t hold back with his effusive compliments. “My boy is already swimming like a professional!” 

Luhan: Seeing Xiumin’s son already swimming at a satisfactory level, Luhan would zealously try to get his apprehensive little son to come into the water. “Come on buddy, it’s not that scary,” dipping his little boy’s hand into the water’s balmy surface, he would gently pat his son’s head reassuringly. “See? It’s nice isn’t it?” Though his son still seems tentative, Luhan would eye his wife murmuring: “I think we should just start with the jacuzzi.” 

Kris: He encourages his little daughter, who lingers hesitantly by the edge of the pool to jump in, promising that he’ll catch her. Kris would be incredibly patient with his daughter, never moving from his spot in the pool, arms outstretched widely awaiting for her small frame to hit the water. After many attempts with his daughter dashing to the edge of the pool only to halt in her tracks, she’ll finally dive in, only for Kris to teem with ebullition at her bravery. “That was amazing princess. You’ll be a better swimmer than your mother at this rate,” with a swift kiss to her forehead, his little girl wouldn’t stop leaping into the waters from then on. 

Suho: He’ll go out of his way to find swimming classes for his daughter, so she’ll become more accustomed with the idea of swimming itself. Paying for each expense, Suho would linger by the poolside keep a close eye on his little girl and her instructor as she practices her dog paddle. Always reassuring her with his infectious grin, he’ll consistently nudge at the parents to his side pointing to his little girl with effervescence and pride. “It’s her first time here! She’s doing really good don’t you think?” 

Lay: Like Minseok, Yixing would be direct in coaching his little boy with swimming. Always by his side, sometimes even hesitant to let his son drift on his own, Yixing is still as composed and patient as usual with his little son. I see Yixing getting one of those miniature pools for his son as opposed to starting him off in a large pool. “You’re doing so well my prince. Soon, you’ll be able to swim with your older sister and uncles.” 

Baekhyun: Being as playful as he is, Baekhyun’s way of teaching is to incorporate an element of fun for his son. While his little boy is wading through the water carefully, inner tube safety fastened around him, Baekhyun would introduce him to water guns explaining how once he gets better, he can engage in battles with his EXO uncles. “Make sure you target your uncles Chanyeol and Kyungsoo! It’s a display of skill! You want to try? Just once, the more you practice, the more I can become convinced that you can handle one of these!”

Chen: Jongdae would go out of his way to get all sorts of convivial inflatable toys for his daughter, to make the learning process more mirthful. “See? It goes around your waist like this princess. It’ll help you stay up. Remember, you always want to be afloat. Later, you can learn to swim underwater like your Uncle Chanyeol. He can swim with fish you know?” With all his tall tales about the other members, Jongdae eventually will invite them over to swim with his little girl. 

Chanyeol: He loves inviting the other members to watch every bit of his little daughter’s improvements with swimming. Chanyeol is the typical overly effervescent parent with little milestones such as this, so he wouldn’t hesitate in allowing others to take part in such a special, crucial breakthrough such as this. He would get the other members to cheer on his little girl as she paddles efficiently through the water. He’s always posting little videos of his daughter’s success on his IG. 

D.O: He takes this incredibly serious and is most straightforward in his teachings with his little son. Kyungsoo would want to ensure that his little boy is sufficient in whatever level of swimming proficiency before he can advance to things like diving, swimming to deeper ends of the pool, etc. Kyungsoo would be the most guarding and watchful of all the members while overseeing his son learning to swim. 

Tao: While in his efforts teach his son to swim, Tao would be mostly focused on attaining all sorts of ‘posh’ swim gear. Such as expensive water toys and those oversized, inflatable water slides. He wants to make this centralized on the conviviality of swimming for his little boy. Oh how much he would lament over the other members getting word of his new gadgets, always wanting to visit. “Why do you guys always want to come over?! These are for my son! I can’t help that they’re so entertaining for a pool party!” 

Kai: He loves imitating elegant ballet routines in the water with his little girl nearby. Jongin’s way of teaching includes ample amounts of references to dancing and how swimming is all about movement and flow. He’ll gently twirl her while she wades in the water before gliding his daughter from one side of the pool to the other. He’ll be sure to report to her mother on their daughter’s every bit of progress. “Look how good she’s getting jagi! She’s a real ballerina now.” 

Sehun: He is superb at getting his little daughter to practice by promising her to take her to a water park so long as she keeps her end of the bargain by becoming exceptional at swimming. To prepare for what’s imminent, Sehun would entice his daughter by randomly borrowing water guns from Baekhyun and Jongdae as well as plenty of rafts in the shades of vibrant greens and pinks from Suho, always reminding her that it’s for their eventual trip to the water park. 


This is all I want, a little ocean front beach house, with a hammock where I can cuddle with my husband and take naps with my children. Where I would never miss a sunset because even if I’m busy I could just lift my head up and watch in wonder. I don’t need a mansion, shoot I don’t need a lot of land, I’ll share the nature! Shoot if a tourist wants to enjoy the sand in front of my house while wearing sandals and socks, I’ll let him, they’ll just have to put up with me asking their whole life stories and not taking no for an answer when I invite them to have lunch with us. I just want to be able to have a cup of coffee on my porch and listen to the waves roll in and instead of procrastinating by watching tv. I want to take a long walk on the beach. I don’t need a million dollars, I would rather be paid in laughter, ocean swims, cool summer breezes, late night strolls, sandy feet, dolphin sightings, and sun rays. And world, I’m sorry, but this is not too much to ask~
—  Olga Sergeyev || raysofthesun
Ink-Matty Healy Imagine

Requested: Yes

Warnings: Some sensuality and fluff

A/N: This is a sequel to the previous Matty Healy imagine I did. Hope you enjoy it!

Originally posted by 6letlarrylive9

   “Are you sure about this, Matty?” I asked, eyes glued to the framed black and white old school, traditional, and Japanese style tattoo examples that hung on the off-white walls in the back room of the tattoo studio.

   Matty was lying on the black leather reclining client’s seat, wearing a long-sleeve black shirt that hung off his body, showing off his previous chest piece, and tight black jeans. He seemed impossibly calm, but that could have had something to do with the cigarettes he’d smoked before we came in.

    “Positive, love. What better way is there to celebrate our anniversary than with a little ink?” Matty asked.

   “But it’s so…permanent.”

    “That’s the idea,” Matty said. “I told you that you didn’t have to come.”

    “I wanted to. Thought I may as well be supportive.”

    Matty gave me that look that told me that he knew I was lying. Well, of course I was! Ever since he told me that his anniversary gift to me was going to be a tattoo on himself, I had been trying to talk him out of it. Since he had gotten tattooed before, the pain and permanent arguments were out of the window. So, I tried to tell him how research shows that it’s rare for couples to stay together after getting matching tattoos.

   “Well, we’ll prove them wrong,” he had said.

   Honestly, I did find it endearing how he thought we were going to be together for a long time, but I didn’t want him to get a tattoo that he would regret. If he broke up, he would look at it and be reminded of the stupid mistake that he made when we were together. However, I did hope that we wouldn’t have to break up ever especially after the whole debacle with my parents.

    Leon, the tattoo artist covered in colorful and interesting tattoos, walked in and sat in the artist’s stool next to his equipment .”So, you’ve decided on what you wanted?”

   “Yeah, I want Milady written across my right hand, right below the knuckles, in this,” Matty pointed to the script in the portfolio on his lap, “font.”

    Leon looked at it and nodded. “Can do.” He looked at me. “Nothing for you?”

    “No, no, I couldn’t.”

    “Why not? You’d look proper fit with one,” Matty teased.

    “We’ve already been over this: I work in a lab twenty hours a day, five days a week, and I need to look as professional as possible—no offense.”

    “None taken.”

    “I’m just here for support.”

    “Nice girlfriend,” Leon commented.

     “Thanks,” Matty said.

     Leon began doing the outline and I shifted my weight from one Stuart Weitzman over-the-knee boot to the other. The fact that Matty was getting a tattoo for me was not only sweet but solidified the whole “bad boy not worthy of me” idea my parents had of him. The brunch that my mother had invited me to after running into Matty and me was full of berating me for even speaking to a musician like Matty.

    “They’re no good, Y/N,” Dad said. “Why don’t you go out with that prince of Luxuemborg?”

    “Because he’s into race cars and I hate race cars. Besides, Mom, Dad, I really like Matty. He is a lot smarter and much different than what you think of him. Why can’t you give him a chance?”

    “Because he’s trash! He’s musician trash!” Mom exclaimed.

    “He is not trash!” I hissed back. “He is kind, sensitive, and has so much integrity that it’s amazing.” 

    “That’s what he wants you to think. As soon as you…sleep with him, he’ll throw you aside, and move on to the next girl.”

   “It sounds like you have experience with that, Mother.”
   The look on my parents’ face was filled with horror. Never had I dared to insult or stand up to my parents before, but she had crossed the line. Matty wasn’t like that, at least, I hadn’t thought so at the time. 

   “You apologize to your mother this instant, Y/N,” Dad demanded.

   “I will when she apologizes to Matty.”

   After that, I hardly spoke to my parents outside of holidays and birthdays. Even though Matty and I were going strong for three years, my parents refused to take it seriously. I decided that it was their problem and not mine. I was happy to be with Matty and he pushed me out of my comfort zone—-I needed that.

   He grabbed my hand as Leon started the tattoo gun. “Here it goes.”

   “You’re doing this for my benefit, aren’t you?” I said, my eyes trained on Leon’s hand as it got closer to Matty’s.

   “Of course.”

   “Now, you’re just going to feel a little sting,” Leon said.

    Matty didn’t even flinch and just watched Leon do his work while I couldn’t have been squeezing his hand harder. It was interesting to see Leon tattoo Matty since he was so graceful about it. 

    “I still can’t believe you’re doing this,” I whispered.

    “Too late to turn back now,” Matty said.

    “Why would you get this now? I mean, who knows what’s going to happen?”

     Matty eyed me. “Y/N, if I was going to break up with you, I would’ve done it a long time ago. Most people get sick of each other by this time but I find you interesting to be around. Sure, you can be a proper basket case sometimes but you’re also the smartest person I know. I couldn’t love you anymore if I tried.”

    Even though Matty had told me he loved me before on several different occasions, it was the way he said it then that made me so happy. He basically said that he was always going to love me and that made me feel safe because he felt the exact same way as me.

   “I know the feeling,” I muttered before pressing my lips gently against his.

   Seconds later, he let go of my hand to run his hand through my hair as he kissed me back harshly. I smiled into it and nearly forgot that Leon was still sitting there and I pulled away.

   “Sorry about that,” I said, feeling my cheeks get warmer.

   “Trust me, it wouldn’t be the worst thing that’s happened back here,” Leon said, still concentrating on his work.

   Five minutes later, Leon was wrapping Matty’s hand in shrink wrap and giving him after care instructions. Milady was written on Matty’s hand in a delicate, feminine font. It kind of reminded me of my grandmother’s signature; she had such beautiful handwriting.

   “What do you think, love?” Matty asked.

   “It’s gorgeous.”

   “Makes you want one, doesn’t it?” Leon teased.

   “Yeah, that’ll be the day.”

   As Leon and Matty chuckled, I couldn’t help but wonder “why not?”. If I got a small enough tattoo, I could easily hide it at work and no one would be the wiser. Plus, my parents would never have to know about it if I was smart with placement. 

   “Could you do it now, Leon?”
   Then, Matty and Leon stopped laughing.

   “Uh, yeah, I guess, if you’re sure about it,” Leon said.

   “I’m sure.”

   “You do know that this is permanent, right?” Matty asked.

   “Of course,” I said as I laid down on the chair. “I want a small crown on my pointer finger.”

   “Like this?” Leon pointed out a cute little cartoon crown in his portfolio.


   “Cheers.” Leon began sketching and Matty stood next to me.

   “You don’t have to do this for me, Y/N.” 

   “I’m not. I’ve always kind of wanted a tattoo so why not a crown?”

   “Sure, you are my queen.” Matty kissed my cheek.

   “And you are my king,” I teased.

   “All right, enough, enough. You can distract her after I get started.” Leon said as he drew the outline on my finger. “Looks good?”


  “All right, I’m going to do the first line, tell me if there’s any issue and I will stop.”


   I leaned back and grabbed Matty’s hand since I would certainly need it in that moment. Part of me couldn’t believe that I was getting a tattoo. I used to think that only tramps and rock stars got tattoos but it seemed appropriate to get one. Plus, my parents would probably die if/when they find out about it. 

   “Okay, here it comes,” Leon said.

  I didn’t really feel anything as Leon drew on the first line—-it just felt like someone was drawing on my finger but was digging in a little bit more.

  “You’re doing great, love,” Matty said.

  “Geez, you make it sound like I’m giving birth,” I said.

  “I suppose this is good practice for that, but you’ll probably break my hand in half when the time comes.”
  I turned to Matty slowly. “You want to have kids? With…with me?”

 “Course, thought that was obvious.”

 It would’ve been more obvious if we had discussed having children earlier or ever during our relationship. For Pete’s sake, we hadn’t even talked about marriage! The idea of having children scared me with the whole idea of gaining fifty plus pounds, taking care of someone all the time, and having someone spit up on me regularly. 

  “No, it wasn’t.” I looked at his hand. “But, the idea of having kids with you doesn’t sound too bad.”

  Before I knew it, Leon was finished. He bandaged up my hand and told me to stay away from the sun and swimming for at least two weeks and Matty would help me with the rest. We paid and headed back out into the dreary London weather.

  “This has to be our most eventful anniversary: getting tattoos, talking about children,” I teased.

  “And who knows? Maybe we’ll get married.”
  “Maybe. I would just want to wait because I want my parents to be there.”

   Matty groaned. “But we both know they hate me.”
   “Hopefully, by the time we’re planning our wedding, we will be able to show them just how upstanding of a guy you are.”

   Matty’s smile faltered slightly. “Yeah.”

   “C’mon! There’s a brownie cake back at the flat with our names on it.”

   “Alright, I’m on it.”
   Little did I know that Matty had a little surprise for me in his jacket pocket, inside a ring box, to be exact.

insecure: jealousy;

member- taekook x you

genre- fluff, (very) slight angst, au

words- 1,352

summary- you cant help but get a little jealous of taehyung & jungkook always being toegther. polyamorous!au

a/n- here is the fluffy version! i hope you guys like this one too! i hope they aren’t too similar! 

Originally posted by taekookie-bts


Usually, you aren’t the jealous type. In fact, it’s crucial for your relationship not to be. But sometimes you just can’t help it. Especially when it’s swim season. 

It started with Jungkook. He likes to be active all the time, which is why he’s on both the school’s baseball and swim team. When Jungkook went to the first optional swim practice, he came back buzzing about how much fun it was and how Taehyung would love it. Next thing you knew, Taehyung was going to practices with Jungkook, which ended up in both of them making the team. Of course, your boys are talented (and they both happen to look fantastic without a shirt on). Once they were both on the team, it was weekends without them and evenings spent waiting for them to come home. And you hate it. 

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Take care ~ Jackson imagine

Pairing: Reader x Jackson Word count: 560 Summary: Jackson wants you to come to the dance studio to keep him company, and is upset when all you do is study (Fluff) “Hey, hey Y/N” “What is it Jackson?” You sigh. You were currently sitting cross legged on the floor of a JYP dance studio with textbooks spread out around you. Your boyfriend Jackson begged and begged you to go to the dance studio to keep him company while he practised, even though you tried refusing, saying you had to study for upcoming exams. “Please” he had begged “no one else we be there” “Jackson I’m not gonna be able to talk to you, I have to study!” “I don’t care if you can’t talk to me, I just want you there.” Eventually you had agreed, and you had been sitting on the floor for the past 2 hours with Jackson trying to get your attention. “How am I supposed to get your attention?!” You don’t respond. “I can do a flip” you hear a loud thud but still don’t look up, the words on the page of your book starting to swim in front of you. “How much longer do you have to study?” He sat down (not very gracefully) next to you and put his arm around your shoulders, putting his hand over yours. You allow yourself to glance at him, taking in his after workout look, sweat dripping down his face and arms (which was kinda hot) with his shirt clinging to his muscles. You gulp and turn away. “As long as I need to.” “Jagi you’ve been working solid for 2 hours. Please take a break, or at least eat something. You should put your health above grades.” He pleads, and the note of desperation in his voice causes you to turn your head towards him. His eyes are large with concern and you sigh, putting your head against his shoulder. Suddenly all your fatigue crashed down on you, and you bury your face into his shoulder, clutching onto his tank top. He silently wraps his arm around you and you sit there for a while, trying not to let tears spill over, partly because of tiredness and partly because you realised you love him so fucking much. After a minute or two of heavy breathing he puts his hand on the back of your head and kisses you on the top of your head, then your forehead then your closed eyelids, temples, nose, cheeks, and you giggle at his childishness. Finally he kissed you on the lips, softly holding the back of your neck, pulling you close to him. He gently takes your waist and pulls you on top of him so your legs are either side of him and your arms are around his neck. You break your kiss and put your head on his shoulder, basically lying on his torso. You feel him let out a breath and wrap his arms around you, pulling you against him for what felt like the thousandth time. “Please look after yourself” he whispers. “I will. Only if you will too, Jackson. You worry me about how much you train.” Your body shakes as he laughs, and he pushes your shoulders back so you’re looking at him. “Well then, I guess we’ll just have to look after each other.” He pushes a strand of hair behind your ear, sliding his hand back around your neck and kissing you once more, your books and his dance routine long forgotten.

Originally posted by fuckyeahjinson


Imagine telling Dean you’re not sure you can keep living this life.

This last year had been the worst year of your life. Sure, you’d met the Winchester brothers and became as close as one could with the two of them. But even that didn’t make up for all you had lost, your family and your best friend.

The most recent hunt in which you almost lost your life brought a startling realization to you. You couldn’t do this anymore. You wanted to be with your family, you didn’t have anything tying you to this life anymore. The brothers would miss you, maybe, but they’d move on and forget about you in time. This was your out, you thought as you laid there bleeding profusely from your right side, a white light starting to cloud your vision.

Next thing you know, Dean’s face is swimming in front of yours. He is screaming things you are trying to hear, but the light is overwhelming you. You just want to give in and let go.

With a moment of clarity, you are able to hear Dean’s voice and voice your thoughts, gasping for breath.

“Dean,” you uttered breathlessly. “It’s okay. Let me go. I don’t have a reason to hang on,” you choked out. “Let me be with my family. I can be happy again if you just let me die. I can’t keep doing this.” The tears were falling freely as Dean’s outline left your swimming vision.

The next thing you hear, a lamp is being thrown across the room and Dean’s voice is coming to you with crystal clarity.

“Damnit, Y/N!” he screamed. “You don’t get to check out on me. Don’t think about it for one second,” he started to shake as he kneeled beside you again, gathering you in his arms.

“I love you, is that not enough of a reason to hang on?” He asked, tears streaming freely down his face.

You sputtered words and you struggled to breath. “You, you love me?” you coughed trying to wrap your thoughts around Dean’s confession.

“Of course, Y/N,” he smiled sadly. “It’s taken this for me to realize you didn’t know. You can’t give up on me.” He pulled you close to him wrapping his arms around you as his tears fell on your face. Your tears mingling with his on your check. He pulled slowly away from you, looking into your eyes. “There ain’t no me if there ain’t no you,” he spoke passionately. “So don’t you dare check out on me!”

“Dean, I love you,” you choked out, Deciding right there that you must fight. If someone as broken as Dean could love you, you couldn’t quit that easily.

Just then you heard the ambulance, Sam must’ve called for one while Dean had been by your side.

“Hang on, sweetheart,” he whispered as he lifted you off the floor. “Everything is going to be alright.”

An itroduction to the Samezuka Chat

If anyone wants to rp msg me on kik《《《  My username you can search for is Samezuka_Senpais《《《 or if you would like to look up the Samezuka Anime Chat, our hashtag is #SamezukaChat

Just send me a message and whenever I’m able I’ll msg you back and we can plot and talk about roleplay! 🖋 As for the Samezuka Anime chat, Oc’s welcomed and Multiverse, I would love to see some fans of Free!

Originally posted by chiamis

I’ve been doing A LOT of thinking tonight about what I need to do next in terms of recovery. Now that I essentially have bingeing and purging under control I want to start increasing my intake so I’m eating a proper amount of food everyday. I haven’t been *restricting* but I’ve just been eating enough to get by rather than enough to heal my body. But, I also want to stop calorie counting because I’m sick of my head swimming in numbers all the time and I think that in order to break free of my ED I need to be able to eat NORMALLY. So, here is my plan for the next couple of weeks:
• I’m going to increase my intake by 100 calories every 3-4 days until I’m hitting the amount that I need which should take around 2/3 weeks or so?
• When I hit the amount I need, I’ll keep tracking for a few days just to make sure I’m maintaining it.
• Now, here’s when breaking the calorie counting habit steps in. Once I’m definitely eating the right amount, I will take a day where I eat the exact same foods that I ate the day before WITHOUT tracking/counting/logging the calories. If I’d counted them the day before and I’m eating exactly the same that day I’ll have absolutely no reason to justify logging what I’m eating because it won’t be any different from the day previously.
• The day after that I’ll eat the same again but change a meal/snack.
• Then, the day after that I’ll eat the same again but change ANOTHER meal/snack…
• Do you get my drift?
• So eventually I’ll be able to eat differently everyday without calorie counting.
I’m not stupid and I know that this is going to be a long road and it’ll be hard and challenging and I’ll want to give up but I refuse to stay trapped in this illness for the rest of my life and calorie counting isn’t normal and as long as I’m still using any form of behaviour I’m still in the grips of my eating disorder. I think the biggest challenge for me is eating enough but not to the point where I feel *stuffed* because that’s a huge trigger for me so I’m gonna keep going with regular eating (3 meals + 3 snacks or tbh maybe even another snack on top of that if necessary) rather than 3 big meals. Ok I’m rambling now but that’s my plan for the upcoming weeks. Let’s see how this goes.

When I was 6 years old I went to a waterpark and wanted to swim shirtless to “pretend” that I was a boy to this other group of boys I was with, but at some point I was told that it was weird of me to do since I “wasn’t”. 

So I went home, super upset, I tried to teach myself to pee standing up, and just thought about what it would feel like to magically wake up as a biological boy and feel comfortable with my body. After a while I gave up on hoping because I assumed it would never happen. 

Today, I’m just months away from having the first stage of bottom surgery and it feels so fuckin’ surreal to think that one day I’ll fall asleep and a few hours later wake up with this part of my body that I’ve been desperately wishing for for 15+ years. And that’s all because I took the risk of coming out and being honest with myself, and pushing myself to stay alive through the hundreds of times I didn’t want to.

I wish I could go back to my 6 year old self and just tell him that what he’s missing will come back to him, and that one day he’ll be comfortable enough to go swimming as one of the boys and one day he’ll be able to pee standing up no problem and one day he’ll be able to look at his body naked and see what’s meant to be there.


I wake up in the morning dreading to get out of bed
I would rather sink into swampy sheets and hid under lily pads
Only hoping that something will leap over and realize what´s under the surface
Swimming around in muck barely coming up for any air even though I´m supposed to be walking on land
Eventually I´m able to fish myself out just to be thrown into another form of lost
Now I sink into marsh not able to get out
I realize the more I struggle the deeper I go
Eventually I stop moving hoping to escape
But sometimes I am the one holding myself back
Like when I lay in my bed not wanting to move my damaged body
From years of the lack of air

anonymous asked:

Samezuka + Makoto where their gf tells them that she feels guilty because they are always buying her gifts and she can't afford to buy any gifts for them. Also congrats on making it through exams!

accurate for today tbh (‘tis my father’s birthday, but he surprised me with a fairly expensive bag i’ve wanted for a while and i’m broke so all i could do was pay for lunch ;-;) also omf i’ve been so tired recently, hence the much reduced output rate ahahaha help

Your boyfriend always did love spoiling you. He had always been generous to you, but recently, he liked to go the extra mile - you couldn’t recall the last time that you’d even paid half for a date, let alone managed to actually buy him a gift in return for all of his. As lovely as it was, and as much as you knew that he just did it because he cared, you couldn’t help but feel a little guilty. It wasn’t that you didn’t enjoy his gifts, it was just… Not being able to get him something in return. The feeling had been building for a while, but especially with his most recent gifts, you knew you had to say something.


Makoto turned when he heard your voice, warm smile gracing his face when he acknowledged you.

“Hey! How’re you doing?” Of course, Makoto never meant anything maliciously. The gifts he got you were just a result of his natural propensity to be kind towards others, so you hadn’t really thought of it until he started insisting that he’d pay for all of your university books. That was a hell of a lot of money, and you knew that he was no where near well-off enough to be able to comfortably afford both his own and your books. Either way, he had pushed until you’d given in, and it had left a rather bitter taste in your mouth at your own inability to repay his generosity.

“Yeah… I was just thinking…” you weren’t quite sure how to say it - you didn’t want it to come out as negative, just get a point across. “I… Do I ever seem… Ungrateful to you?” When you said this, the gentle smile on his face dropped, eyes growing concerned.

“Where’s this coming from?” His voice was quiet, almost meek, and you felt yourself inwardly flinch.

“I just… I feel like you buy so much for me and I can’t ever afford to repay you. It doesn’t exactly make me feel good.” Your voice trailed off at the end, growing slowly more quiet as you crossed your arms across your body, almost as though you were protecting yourself.

“Oh…” Makoto seemed a little lost for a while, shoulders dropping and fingers fiddling with the hem of his shirt, but it didn’t take him long to recover from your words. In two long strides, he was holding your shoulders in his large hands, angling you towards his body.

“Don’t feel bad.” When you looked at him, he was smiling again, emerald eyes affectionate as he gazed down at you. “I just… I guess I enjoy spoiling you.” He paused for a moment, teeth worrying his bottom lip, before continuing. “It’s not that I think you’re unable to support yourself… Just more… You mean a lot to me, and I want to show it in every way possible.”

Large hands cupped your face, thumb absently stroking across your cheek as he angled your face to his.

“I love you. Don’t feel guilty that you can’t buy me anything - you just being here is gift a enough for me.”

Rin was working at the time, throwing a glance over his shoulder at you before returning to his book.

“Yo.” His tone of voice wasn’t unfriendly, but it did indicate that, perhaps, now wasn’t the best time.

“I just… Had a thought. I-” You stopped yourself mid-sentence when you realised he probably wasn’t going to pay attention to you right now. “Ah, don’t worry.”

Just as you turned to walk away from him, Rin’s voice stopped you.

“Hey, what is it? Is something bothering you?” He’d swung his chair round, now facing you instead of the desk he had previously been hunched over.

“It’s not much. Get back to work, Rin.” Forcing a smile, you turned to walk away once more, only to hear the sound of Rin’s office chair moving rapidly towards you - which was the only warning you got before he half-collided with you, half-tackled you onto his lap.

“What’s up, baby?” Now his tone of voice was completely different, craning his neck over your shoulder and heaving you up in his lap so you could look him in the eyes, albeit awkwardly, from this position.

Might as well get straight to the point…

“Don’t you think that you spend a little too much on me? Especially since I can’t even repay you, and it’s just… A little… Unfair for you, I guess?” You weren’t quite sure how to phrase it - you didn’t want to outright tell him to stop purchasing gifts for you, but at the same time, you did feel quite guilty about your inability to repay him.

“Pff… Too much? Honestly, if you can define too much, go ahead and accuse me all you want. But…” He nudged your ribs slightly, prompting you to turn to face him in the chair. “… Nothing will ever be too much-” you opened your mouth to stop him, but Rin simply placed a finger over your lips, halting your speech. “-for you. As for you not being able to buy anything… I don’t really care. It’s cheesy as hell, but I’m pretty happy with you just being here for me.” A brief kiss from him sealed his words in stone, and it was all you could do to prevent the blush on your face.

“Just keep being here for me, ____.”

Sousuke had, as though he knew what you were about to say hours before the thought even crossed your mind, already prepared dinner for you that night. It had gotten to the point where even the smallest gestures, such as him cooking or cleaning, felt like they were simply adding to the debt you felt he held against you. It was stupid, yes, but…

“Hellooo… You at home in there?” Across the table from you, Sousuke was waving his hand in your face, a small grin on his face, and you realised that you’d completely spaced out.

“Oh! Sorry…” Chuckling at yourself, you prodded at the rice on your plate, temporarily forgetting what you had even been worrying about.

“You alright? You seemed like you wanted to say something, just then.” Of course, Sousuke, ever concerned for you, had picked up on your worries without you even voicing them - at this point, there wasn’t even any point in trying to hide it.

“I kinda feel like… Y'know, you spend quite a bit on me. And a relationship’s meant to be fair, right?” Warily, Sousuke nodded. “… I just feel like I can’t do anything in return. I feel a little useless, to be honest…” Feebly, you laughed, a self-deprecating smile masking your worries. Sousuke was quiet for a while - not that this was unusual - before taking a breath.

“You do realise I don’t want anything material from you, right?” Your head snapped up, and you took in his serious expression - maintaining eye contact with him when he was like this was difficult, to say the least… Almost unnerving. “And I don’t want you to think that just because I spend money on you, I value you any less…” He smiled now, eyes creasing a little at the corners as he reached his own hands out to grasp yours.

“You mean a lot to me, ____ - I just enjoy showing that in any way I can, and I never want you to feel pressured into spending a lot of money on me… Besides,” his eyes were glinting with mirth now, and his free hand brushed away the collar of his shirt to reveal a dark bruise. “you show your affections in quite a way I appreciate far more than expensive gifts.”


Nitori’s head immediately snapped up, almost painfully fast, when he heard your call.

“Ah, ____-chan! I was just looking at that mug you showed me yesterday… I mean, especially since yours broke a few days ago, I thought that I could get you this one…” His smile was contagious, and, despite yourself, you found your mouth stretching to mirror his own. You couldn’t allow yourself to forget why you had come to speak to him in the first place, though, and this particular mug, coincidentally, gave the opportune example.

“Ai… That mug was pretty expensive. I can’t-”

“Well, it was partially my fault the mug broke anyway, this is the least I can do to repay you!” Before you could even finish, he cut you off, and turned his gaze back to the tablet in his hand. “Do you think blue or cream?”


“Cream would go best with the plates we’re getting, I guess…”


You didn’t like having to be sharp with your boyfriend, but this time, you needed him to pay attention. Eyes wide, his gaze swiftly returned to your figure.

“… Yes?”

“Let me pay for the mug. You’ve been spending an awful lot of money on me recently, even with the move, and I just-” he looked like he was about to speak, so you picked up the pace a little. “-I feel like you’re spoiling me too much - you know I don’t have enough to repay you, so just, please, let me cover this, at least…”

He looked a little forlorn, eager eyes drooping at your harsh tone of voice, but Nitori had to face the reality of the situation. You weren’t rich, and even though he was a little better off than you, and the two of you were moving in together, you couldn’t allow him to sustain you entirely.

“But I thought you liked the gifts…?” He sounded dejected, as though he were a child being scolded by his mother, and immediately, you felt guilty.

“I don’t mean it like that… I love the gifts, but…” You sighed, running a hand through your hair as you struggled to find the correct words. “It makes me feel a little guilty. Like, you buy me all of these lovely gifts, and I really can’t afford anything to repay you-”

“But I buy the gifts because I want to, ____.” He was serious now, large blue eyes piercing through yours. “I won’t buy them if they made you this uncomfortable, but… I like spending money on you! I really don’t want anything in return… You just loving me, moving in with me… Being able to wake up next to you is enough, ____.”

Nitori was always a good sweet-talker, and sure enough, you soon found the agitation gathered within you slowly dissipating as his words came. Knowing him, you’d have the mug tomorrow, regardless of whether or not you protested.

Momotarou, on the other end of the phone, seemed more than happy to cut you off, fast-paced speech that you couldn’t quite understand firing out from the speaker. You sighed, placing down the phone for a moment as you gazed at his latest gift to you - you knew that he didn’t deal well with the distance of your relationship, but ever since you had moved to Tokyo, his spendings on you had doubled, if not tripled.

“You done?” Picking up the phone again, you chucked as Momo’s speak tailed off.

“Yeah. How d'ya like the scarf, ____? I thought it would look amazing with your hair… Send me a photo later!” His enthusiasm was obvious, even through the phone, and you couldn’t stop a small smile creeping onto your face at his attitude.

“I love it, Momo. But that… Kind of relates to something I need to talk to you about.”

You swore you could physically hear his body stop moving from the other end of the phone as this statement hit him. Momotarou had a tendency to take things the wrong way, so you knew you needed to tread carefully here.

“You… Uh… Spend a lot of money on me… Any particular reason for that?”

When he remained completely silent, you grew a little frantic.

“It’s just that I feel like should be doing the same and I don’t have the money to, and it’s-”

“I don’t want you to run to someone else, ____…”

It was your turn to stop. And, apparently, his turn to panic.

“I mean, not that I think you’re unfaithful! I just really, really love you and I’ve… Never managed to have such a steady relationship before and I just thought that… If I got you stuff… You wouldn’t leave me? Plus there’s the whole long-distance thing, and that-”

“Hey, Momo, when are you free next?”

“Uh…” There was a long pause before he answered. “Tomorrow?”

“I’m coming to see you.”

I need to give this boy a hug.

Seijuro yawned, movements lethargic as he raised a hand to cup your face. He looked gorgeous - red hair tussled from sleep (and, perhaps, other activities), eyes still hazy from his fresh awakening, the morning sunlight through the blinds illuminating lean muscle underneath taut, tanned skin.

“… We need to talk.”

It was as though you flipped a switch - hooded, lazy eyes flew open wide, his hand freezing on your jawline as you watched his muscles visibly tense.

“… Did I do something?” His words were slow, cautious, voice still deep and cracking slightly from being unused. He was, rather amusingly, still frozen in place, eyes almost comically wide.

“No, Sei.” Immediately, he relaxed, sighing and worming his other arm underneath you, pulling you to his chest, before realising that he probably wasn’t completely in the clear yet, and clutching you to him a little too tightly inadvertently. Grunting at the sudden constriction, you persevered nonetheless. “I was just thinking about something and thought I should talk to you about it.”

“Does it involve me?” He was still on edge, evidently.

“Yes.” You could practically hear his mind whirring, doing what was likely far too much work for so early in the day, trying to figure out what he had done recently that might have gotten him in trouble.

“Why do you keep on spending so much money on me, Sei?” You were sure that, if you could see his face, it would be wearing a look of utter confusion at this moment in time, so, to relieve his pain a little, you elaborated. “It’s not that I don’t appreciate it, I just… It’s left me feeling a little… Inadequate, recently. I don’t have enough to get you anything that nice, so…” Inevitably, your voice trailed off, leaving only the sounds of the birds outside to fill the pregnant silence.

“I didn’t know you felt that way.” He sounded serious, all traces of sleep gone from his voice. “I don’t even intend to make you feel that way, ____-”

“Oh, I know! I don’t mean it like that, it’s just-”

“I just want to make sure that you stay with me, is all.” That hit you pretty hard. He was doing this because he was worried you might leave him?

“Seijuro…” Maneuvering yourself so that your chest was resting over his, you looked him in the eyes. “I wouldn’t leave you if you stopped buying me gifts… I adore you, I love you… Regardless of how much you spend on me.”

His irises were like molten gold as they stared back into yours, and his smile warmed your whole body.

“Good to know.” Long fingers tangled themselves in your hair, and he pressed his forehead to yours, adoration gleaming in his eyes. “Not gonna stop me buying you stuff, though.”