yo fam i read ur grifnut/rvbnut tags,,like just make a post, i want to reblog this
OOH u mean my tags on this post yea? i’ll just make it THIS POST 8))) i was just gonna screencap all them juicy tags but since rvbnut [best term ever thank u for that] is otp, i will retype for better readability + i thought of some extra things to throw in, so here we go:
as mentioned already, there’s donut’s super secret diary where donut describes"gazing silently into each other’s visors” and feeling a connection, as well has having sat in grif’s lap”. i very much believe donut had a crush on grif at some point
there’s some PSA or something that for the life of me I can’t remember the name of, and it might just be a dvd extra cause I found it on youtube not through the rvb channel, where the reds are getting on motorcycles to go somewhere and grif has to share w/donut, and hes Very Hesitant and i dont remember what exactly donut was saying but it was Very Suggestive how he was telling grif to get behind him and hold on tight or w/e, and when grif didnt wanna get on it with him he was like “whats wrong ;(?? dont be shy~”
ive pulled out my book now and donut describes the play they put on for tucker as being about “the band of handsome male survivors braving the elements together” so, donut thinks he + the other BGC members are handsome
“The first thing the doctor did when we got him back over to our base was pin Sarge against the wall with the Warthog. I always thought if anyone was going to ram Sarge up to the wall, it would be me, seeing as how I’ve been angling for a promotion lately” -another entry in donut’s diary. i honest to god have no idea how this could be taken as an innuendo, bc it straight up sounds like donut wants to fuck his way to the top
also in the book, simmons’ self insert fanfiction “Hero In Maroon” has… a special scene with “Donut the Enchanter,” who is “spreading his temptation magic through scandalous dancing.” This is SIMMONS writing this, and simmons has himself say “Tell me what you know about Sarge, else I will have to run you through with my long sword” and, sure, he has donut speak in innuendos and reply to that line with “I like where this is gong. Maybe I’ll keep you here… FOREVER!” but like, simmons literally wrote himself throwing an innuendo to donut. then you have the next few lines “DONUT USES OFFICER HOT PANTS HANDCUFF ATTACK” “”Oh no!” Simmons exclaims. A bed appears behind him. His hands are cuffed to it.” And while the next line is just donut laughing and saying “Now you must watch my rendition of the musical CATS” so while donut wasnt gonna do anything creepy, this really sounds like simmons writing a self insert fic that includes a provocative donut flirting with him while talking about musicals…. simmons dont repress ur crush on donut
^not to mention the officer hot pants comes from donut having dressed up and jumped out of a cake for sarge’s birthday……..
at the finale scene of s13, donut says “I love you, too, Lopez”
Donut lived offscreen with Doc in valhalla, and then was dropped back off there to continue living in valhalla with doc (and lopez’s head) (i could talk for 60 years about them but anyone who’s followed me long enough has heard it all before and i’m tryin to keep the points b r i e f lol)
church has said “I like donut. He’s pretty harmless, man. I-I don’t think he’d hurt a fly.” and upon finding out donut got crushed by a spaceship, he paused his snarking to say “Oh, wait, the pink guy? Oh, I actually liked him!” to which grif replies “Seriously, what’s with all these feelings for donut?”
tucker, thinking donut was a girl bc pink armor, asked donut if he “wanted to date one of us” and then called donut a “tease” when he said he wasn’t a girl
donut polished tucker’s codpiece 3 times when he and caboose were helping tucker get the black gunk off his armor, saying something along the lines of “a 3-coat waxing is just my way of saying I Care :)”
epsilon!tucker, while not canon to actual tucker, is implied to have jacked off to donut bc he thought he was a girl
seems to be implied that tucker and donut were both assigned to the same desert location when everyone got split up, and donut passed out from thirst/exhaustion trying to get tucker’s distress call to the others
in The Best Red vs Blue DVD Ever of All Time, there’s a scene where tucker and donut are introducing “best couple.” Donut goes on about romance, while tucker says couple doesn’t necessarily mean romance, and that “you[donut] think everything is romance! last week you called it romance when i accidentally took a bite of your sandwich” “was it really an accident tucker? was it?” “YES!” “time will tell” “ugh, whatever-” dudes, donut totally had a crush on tucker at least once
i dont have a good source but i remember seeing in a post a while back that there was a scrapped plotline that was gonna be a love triangle between donut, a “confused caboose”, and an unknown third party
i’m willing to bet the confused caboose bit is because caboose seems to have thought (and maybe still does? who knows) that donut was a girl, likely because of the armor. in caboose’s mind, donut’s a girl who says things like “I love caboose, and yet, I’m still afraid of him, he’s so scary :)” [cause he seems to think of himself as intimidating to the red team lol], and then in Head Canon, caboose!donut says something like “i like [something] almost as i like to paint my nails and not talk to boys. i would never talk to boys, especially not caboose for some reason!” which… is hard to make sense of tbh lol, but since everyone in caboose’s mind is how caboose perceives them, it maybe seems like caboose doesnt get as much of donut’s attention as he’d like?? lmfao, it sounds like “not caboose for some reason” means caboose doesn’t really understand either.
donut tearily said to caboose way back in KITBFF: “
Mister Caboose, I just want you to know that even though we are on different teams, and we may never see each other again, whatever happens out there today, I’ll always remember the moments we shared together. You are now, and forever will be… my friend.” very emotional if i do say so myself
there’s this reconstruction deleted scene where i guess donut had gotten transferred to doing special agent stuff w/wash’s division or something (wash calls him Special Agent Donut so, i guess lol). Wash speaks in donut innuendos the whole time he’s talkin about donut [”He’s a back door expert” “if there’s an unsecured rear entrance, he’s your man” “legend has it he can get through even the tightest cracks-” lmfao and they address each other by name, so i like to think they’ve worked together and donut’s… mannerisms… have been Rubbing Off on wash ;p
^also in that deleted scene caboose goes “DONUT! :D” when donut appears and talks, so he’s clearly excited to see him!!!!!!!!!
ahem. point being: the bgc needs to embrace the donut love and i firmly believe that if someone didnt have a crush on donut, donut had a crush on one of them at some point in time
The Dos and Don’ts of Beginning a Novel: An Illustrated Guide
I’ve had a lot of asks lately for how to begin a book (or how not to), so here’s a post on my general rules of thumb for story openers and first chapters!
Please note, these are incredibly broad generalizations; if you think an opener is right for you, and your beta readers like it, there’s a good chance it’s A-OK. When it comes to writing, one size does not fit all. (Also note that this is for serious writers who are interested in improving their craft and/or professional publication, so kindly refrain from the obligatory handful of comments saying “umm, screw this, write however you want!!”)
So without further ado, let’s jump into it!
1. Open with a dream.
“Just when Mary Sue was sure she’d disappear down the gullet of the monstrous, winged pig, she woke up bathed in sweat in her own bedroom.”
What? So that entire winged pig confrontation took place in a dream and amounts to nothing? I feel so cheated!
Okay, not too many people open their novels with monstrous swine, but you get the idea: false openings of any kind tend to make the reader feel as though you’ve wasted their time, and don’t usually jump into more meaty action of the story quickly enough. It makes your opening feel lethargic and can leave your audience yawning.
2. Open with a character waking up.
This feels familiar to most of us, but unless your character is waking up to a zombie attack or an alien invasion, it’s generally a pretty easy recipe to get your story to drag.
No one picks a book to hear how your character brushes their teeth in the morning or what they’d like to have for dinner. As a general rule of thumb, we read to explore things we wouldn’t otherwise get to experience. And cussing out the alarm clock is not one of them.
Granted, there are exceptions if your writing is exceptionally engaging, but in most cases it just sets a slow pace that will bore you and your reader to death and probably cause you to lose interest in your book within the first ten pages.
3. Bombard with exposition.
Literary characters aren’t DeviantArt OCs. And the best way to convey a character is not, in my experience, to devote the first ten pages to describing their physical appearance, personality, and backstory. Develop your characters, and make sure their fully fleshed out – my tips on how to do so here – but you don’t need to dump all that on the reader before they have any reason to care about them. Let the reader get to know the character gradually, learn about them, and fall in love with them as they would a person: a little bit at a time.
This is iffy when world building is involved, but even then it works best when the delivery feels organic and in tune with the book’s overall tone. Think the opening of the Hobbit or Good Omens.
4. Take yourself too seriously.
Your opener (and your novel in general) doesn’t need to be intellectually pretentious, nor is intellectual pretense the hallmark of good literature. Good literature is, generally speaking, engaging, well-written, and enjoyable. That’s it.
So don’t concern yourself with creating a poetic masterpiece of an opening line/first chapter. Just make one that’s – you guessed it – engaging, well-written, and enjoyable.
5. Be unintentionally hilarious.
Utilizing humor in your opening line is awesome, but check yourself to make sure your readers aren’t laughing for all the wrong reasons (this is another reason why betas are important.)
These examples of the worst opening lines in published literature will show you what I mean – and possibly serve as a pleasant confidence booster as well:
“As the dark and mysterious stranger approached, Angela bit her lip anxiously, hoping with every nerve, cell, and fiber of her being that this would be the one man who would understand – who would take her away from all this – and who would not just squeeze her boob and make a loud honking noise, as all the others had.”
– Ali Kawashima
“She sipped her latte gracefully, unaware of the milk foam droplets building on her mustache, which was not the peachy-fine baby fuzz that Nordic girls might have, but a really dense, dark, hirsute lip-lining row of fur common to southern Mediterranean ladies nearing menopause, and winked at the obviously charmed Spaniard at the next table.”
– Jeanne Villa
“As I gardened, gazing towards the autumnal sky, I longed to run my finger through the trail of mucus left by a single speckled slug – innocuously thrusting past my rhododendrons – and in feeling that warm slime, be swept back to planet Alderon, back into the tentacles of the alien who loved me.”
– Mary E. Patrick
“Before they met, his heart was a frozen block of ice, scarred by the skate blades of broken relationships, then she came along and like a beautiful Zamboni flooded his heart with warmth, scraped away the ugly slushy bits, and dumped them in the empty parking lot of his soul.”
– Howie McClennon
If these can get published, so can you.
1. You know that one really interesting scene you’re itching to write? Start with that.
Momentum is an important thing in storytelling. If you set a fast, infectious beat, you and your reader will be itching to dance along with it.
Similarly, slow, drowsy openers tend to lead to slow, drowsy stories that will put you both to sleep.
I see a lot of posts joking about “that awkward moment when you sit down to write but don’t know how to get to that one scene you actually wanted to write about.” Write that scene! If it’s at all possible, start off with it. If not, there are still ways you can build your story around the scenes you actually want to write.
Keep in mind: if you’re bored, your reader will almost certainly be bored as well. So write what you want to write. Write what makes you excited. Don’t hold off until later, when it “really gets good.” Odds are, the reader will not wait around that long, and you’re way more likely to become disillusioned with your story and quit. If a scene is dragging, cut it out. Burn bridges, find a way around. Live, dammit.
2. Engage the reader.
There are several ways to go about this. You can use wit and levity, you can present a question, and you can immerse the reader into the world you’ve created. Just remember to do so with subtlety, and don’t try too hard; believe me, it shows.
Here are some of my personal favorite examples of engaging opening lines:
“In the beginning, the universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move."
– Douglas Adams, the Restaurant at the End of the Universe.
"It was the day my grandmother exploded.”
– Iain Banks, Crow Road.
“A white Pomeranian named Fluffy flew out of the a fifth-floor window in Panna, which was a grand-new building with the painter’s scaffolding still around it. Fluffy screamed.”
– Vikram Chandra, Sacred Games.
See what I’m saying? They pull you in and do not let go.
3. Introduce us to a main character (but do it right.)
“Shadow had done three years in prison. He was big enough and looked don’t-fuck-with-me enough that his biggest problem was killing time. So he kept himself in shape, and taught himself coin tricks, and thought a lot about how much he loved his wife.”
– Neil Gaiman, American Gods.
This is one of my favorite literary openings of all time, because right off the bat we know almost everything we need to know about Shadow’s character (i.e. that he’s rugged, pragmatic, and loving.)
Also note that it doesn’t tell us everything about Shadow: it presents questions that make us want to read more. How did Shadow get into prison? When will he get out? Will he reunite with his wife? There’s also more details about Shadow slowly sprinkled in throughout the book, about his past, personality, and physical appearance. This makes him feel more real and rounded as a character, and doesn’t pull the reader out of the story.
Obviously, I’m not saying you should rip off American Gods. You don’t even need to include a hooker eating a guy with her cooch if you don’t want to.
But this, and other successful openers, will give you just enough information about the main character to get the story started; rarely any good comes from infodumping, and allowing your reader to get to know your character gradually will make them feel more real.
The toughest part of being a writer is that it’s a rare and glorious occasion when you’re actually satisfied with something you write. And to add another layer of complication, what you like best probably won’t be what your readers will like best.
If you refuse to keep moving until you have the perfect first chapter, you will never write anything beyond your first chapter.
Set a plan, and stick to it: having a daily/weekly word or page goal can be extremely helpful, especially when you’re starting out. Plotting is a lifesaver (some of my favorite posts on how to do so here, here, and here.)
Keep writing, keep moving, and rewrite later. If you stay in one place for too long, you’ll never keep going.
lance thinks no one remembers about his birthday. he doesn’t mention it because they have more important things like saving the universe. so lance sits quietly in his room, repeating the names of his parents, siblings, nephews. he tries to remember their faces and panics a little when he needs more than usually to remember his little niece’s laugh and the way her eyes would light up whenever she talked about something she loved.
he used to have a picture of all of them from his mother’s birthday but he lost it on one of the missions, so now all he had was his imagination and he was scared that they look different in his mind than they really do.
when the clock hits midnight, lance mutters a quiet “happy birthday to me”, but then the alarm roars through the castle. lance runs out of his room but he can’t find anyone else. suddenly he hears hunk’s scream, he was shouting lance’s name from one of the hangars. blue’s hangar.
it doesn’t take lance long to get there because despite what everyone else thinks, he’s quick to react when he knows that something is wrong. but when he enters the hangar, his lion is where it always was. it’s dark and suddenly very quiet.
“what is it, girl? where’s hunk?” lance asks, putting one hand on blue, but there’s no answer. lately he got a lot better at communicating with her, so it’s weird that she doesn’t want to talk to him, especially on his birthday. it’s not like she knew, lance was sure even hunk was too busy to actually remember.
after few seconds, blue opens her mouth. a clear message for lance, get in here. so he does, still not sure what to make of all this. the inside of his lion doesn’t light up the way it usually does when lance walks inside but lance is sure he can hear something…
“surprise!” the loud scream is in a perfect sync with the lights that suddenly burst around lance. the boy is so shocked he almost falls on his ass when he sees his friends in front of him.
hunk, pidge, allura, shiro, coran. even keith, despite their loud argument that happened after yesterday’s mission. lance looks from one face to another, feeling the tears forming in his eyes. they remembered.
“you guys even have a cake!” lance squeals with excitement, blinking rapidly to make sure it’s not a dream. but no, there it is, in allura’s hands. a cake that looks almost like the ones he got for his previous birthdays.
“we didn’t really know much about the traditions on earth but the other paladins helped us a lot,” coran explains cheerfully.
and lance lets the tears fall because they didn’t have to do anything. they were fighting zarkon and the galra could attack at any moment, but his friends remembered and did all this… for him. he wants to tell them he doesn’t deserve this, that he wouldn’t be upset if they didn’t remember. but he can’t utter a single word, he just stares at them and feels like the love and happiness will flood out of him any minute now.
hunk steps out first, holding something bright in his hands. “we know how much you miss the earth. we all do, but i’m pretty sure you want to go back the most,” he starts, looking at his best friend. “coran told me you miss the sunlight the most, so… it’s not really the same but me and pidge made this for you from the quintessence. it’s not as hot as the sun, but it’s always warm and the light looks very similar,” hunk explains.
then he puts his gift in lance’s hands and lance shivers. it’s a small ball made of glass with quintessence inside. it’s bright, yellow and so warm. yes, it’s not like the sun, but it’s still more than lance could have asked for. he couldn’t remember when was the last time he actually saw the sunlight, but what he held in his hands right now was probably the closest he’ll get to it in a long time.
“thank you guys,” he sniffles, half-hugging hunk and ruffling pidge’s hair. he can’t stop looking at the yellow light shining through his fingers, he’s afraid that if he’ll turn his gaze away, it will burn out and lance will be in the darkness again.
but then keith comes closer, awkwardly clearing his throat and scratching his neck with his free hand. in another one he holds something small. at first keith’s not saying anything, he just pushes something into lance’s chest so the taller boy has to give hunk his small sun to take what keith gave him. he looks down and breath catches in his throat.
it’s a picture of lance’s family, the one lance thought he had lost forever. it was put in a blue frame with little stars on it. the picture was worn out because lance always kept it folded in a pocket of his jeans or tucked under his uniform, but it was right there and lance couldn’t believe his eyes.
“how did you-”
“i found it,” keith cuts him off in a rush and when lance looks up he can see a blush on his cheeks. keith doesn’t quite meet his eyes. “one time when you got off your lion, you dropped this and i found it. i wanted to give it back but we were all tired after the mission, so i just left it in my room and kind of… forgot about it? yeah, and then we were in this space mall and i saw this frame, so i thought that if you put your picture in it, you wouldn’t lose it again, and then hunk mentioned your birthday and…” keith rambles, unable to stop. lance hears shiro’s chuckle from behind but all he can see is keith.
keith who usually fights with lance, keith who acts like he doesn’t care about anything, keith who actually notices more than anyone. keith who, in some ways, brought lance’s family back to him when lance thought they’re so far away. lance pulls keith into a hug, squeezing him so hard he’s sure a little more pressure would break keith’s ribs. it’s awkward at first because keith isn’t used to being hugged. but it’s not that keith doesn’t like hugs, lance knows that for a fact, he’s just touch-starved, so after a moment he returns the hug, relaxing a little.
“thank you so much,” lance chokes out, trying to get a hold of his own emotions because damn it, he’s not a crybaby.
keith pats his back. “don’t sniffle on my jacket.”
lance laughs and pushes keith away, and then shiro tells him to make a wish and blow the candles, so lance does. he closes his eyes and thinks “go back home with all of my friends after defeating zarkon”, then he blows all of the candles.
and when lance looks at their faces again, sees their smiles, hears their laugh, he thinks that it is. it is a happy day. he turns to thank them again, and that’s when he hears blue’s voice in his head, soft and caring. she says,
“happy birthday, our blue boy.”
lance thinks it sounds almost like his mamá. it’s almost like he’s… home.