i just love her and her acting career

anonymous asked:

maybe a scenario where zen has a gf but you're also in love with him????? ahhhh sorry I just love your scenarios and I want to see more of them ^^

Author’s note: mwahahhaha HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZENNYYYY

The Other Girl

She tilted her head back and laughed, flashing the room with her bright smile. The dress she wore perfectly accented her figure, and her blonde hair flowed down her back like a golden waterfall. She had a straight nose, and pretty blue eyes. In other words, she was perfect.

Of course, you wouldn’t expect anything less from Zen’s girlfriend.

Zen and Hana had met while shooting a car commercial. She was a model who was trying to start her acting career, and he was desperate for a new job. It was, as Zen put it, “love at first scene.” Now, on their five month anniversary, you and the rest of the RFA were sitting around Zen’s living room, laughing and celebrating the couple. There was only one problem.

You were in love with Zen, too.

“That was hilarious,” Hana wiped a tear from her eye. She sighed and snuggled deeper into Zen’s chest.

He smiled and kissed the top of her head, “Aren’t I the luckiest guy in the world?”

A familiar pain stung your heart. You bit your lip and looked away, focusing on the concerned look Seven was giving you instead.

“Stop it,” you mouthed silently.

He rolled his eyes. “I’m sorry,” he mouthed back, giving you another pitying look.

Seven was the only other person that knew about your feelings, and surprisingly, he had been a complete and total sweetheart about it. He would always talk you up to Zen, trying to help your relationship move forward. You actually thought it might have gone somewhere, if it hadn’t been for Hana. After the two got together, Seven stayed right by your side. You closed your eyes, remembering the night after Zen told you about his newly found girlfriend.

“Uh-huh…yeah… that’s great! Okay, Zen, go and call the others. Yes, I’m sure they’ll all be thrilled! Okay, bye.”

You hung up the phone and held it to your chest. I can’t believe he has a girlfriend… and it’s not me.

You covered your mouth to keep the sobs from escaping. The phone in your hand became heavy as your felt your legs get weaker. Slowly, you made your way over to the couch and sat down, placing your cell next to you. Looking at your shaking hands you moved it back and forth in front of your face. I feel like I’m in a dream. Maybe it’s-


The doorbell interrupted your thoughts. You bit your lip and stayed still, hoping whoever was there would go away.


Who the hell would come here at this hour?

You walked over to the door, your legs feeling like they were treading through quicksand. Reaching out, you cracked open the door to see who it was.


You mentally scolded yourself for the way your voice cracked. You looked up at your friend as he stood on your front porch, ice cream in one hand and wine in the other.

“Can I come in?”


He pushed past you and walked into your kitchen. You heard the freezer door open and shut, followed by the clinking of glass. He returned with two glasses of wine and set them down on your coffee table. You stared at him.

“…So, what are you-”

You were stopped by a bone-crushing hug. Seven wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into his chest, burying his head in your hair.

“Zen called me first and told me. He said he was going to call you next, so I came over here… I’m so sorry.”

He loosened his grip and you pulled your head back. “I-I’m fine, you don’t have to worry!”

Seven looked at you and tilted your head up toward him. “You don’t have to lie… not with me.”


Your eyes shot open when you heard Zen calling your name.


You looked around the room, making eye contact with each of the RFA members. Why are they all staring?

“Are you okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

Zen gave you a look and then bit his lip. “You’re crying.”

Your hand shot up to your face like lightning. When you felt the dampness around your eyes, your chest tightened.

“I’m gonna go get some air,” you stood up and walked toward the balcony.

“If you need anything just ask,” you heard Hana call out behind you. Quickly, you made your way outside.


Frantically, you wiped the tears from your eyes. In an attempt to distract yourself, you looked up at the stars above you. It’s just like that night with Zen… the night when we looked at the stars together.

Your mouth formed soft smile as you began to recall what happened that night. Regardless of whom Zen was with, that moment would always be yours.

A sudden burst of wind pulled you out of your reminiscing. The bitter night air burned your chapped lips and sent a shiver down your spine. You looked down to your waist and around your area. Damnit, I forgot my-

“Looking for this?”

Seven stood behind you, holding up your jacket.

“Yeah,” you grabbed it from him, quickly slipping into it, “Thanks, Luciel.”

Seven eyebrows quirked, “Luciel? You almost never call me that.”

“I know,” you looked up at him, “I just need you to understand how much I really mean it. Thank you for everything.”

You could help but notice the slight blush forming on his cheeks. He scratched the back of his neck.

“Well… ah, whatever.”

He reached out and grabbed your wrist, pulling you into a hug.

“I’ll always be here for you.”

You smiled into his chest, letting his words comfort your broken heart.

After a while, you pulled away from him. “Let’s go back inside.”

“You sure you’re okay?”


Following Seven inside, you sat back down in your original spot, and after a while it was like you had never left.

“-And that’s the first time I ever hacked into a database!”

As Seven finished his story, you couldn’t help but smile. Slyly, you looked around to see everyone else’s reactions.

That’s when you noticed it.

The ice cold glare Zen was giving you.

The hell?

  • what she says: i'm fine
  • what she means: jenna marbles never fails to make me cry because she's such a great person who you can tell is so accepting and loving of all types of people and she has never cared about anything other than being happy and that's so admirable and beautiful and i would love to grow up and be like her. she gets a lot of shit for the way she looks and acts in her videos but she is never hurting anybody and if she does on accident she's always so quick to apologize and learn from it. her relationship with julien is so real and pure and you can see how happy they make each other. she never thought her youtube career would go anywhere but now she can do literally whatever she wants in life because she's hilarious and is 100% herself all the time and people love her for it. i just really wanna be like jenna marbles because she has never had the world all figured out and she knows she never will and she doesn't just accept that, she embraces it and is so honest with herself and other people. she's not a perfect person obviously but i think she's one of the main role models in my life at this moment in time

90s gillian anderson wearing too-big flannels and chain smoking nervously bc she’s afraid she won’t land any acting jobs, then chain smoking bc she did land a job and now she’s worried every single day she’ll be fired bc she isn’t good enough

00s gillian anderson with a small child and still dealing with all the mega stardom she never asked for in the first place, carving out an acting career to prove that she deserves the hype 

10s gillian anderson emerging glorious from a string of wtf movies, starring in three shows at once and absolutely killing the entire game, flying all over the world to support the people she loves (even though she doesn’t get much sleep) and putting change in the swear jar for saying “heck” even though her favorite word is fuck

Imagine Jagged Stone being the reason and a driving force behind Marinette's Career taking offp

Imagine Jagged Stone getting really tired of people just not getting his style. The clothes that are chosen for him are boring, his new Image Consultant wants to turn him into a ‘XY-wannabe’ (needless to say they didn’t last very long) and his record contract with Bob Ross Music was torn up after a final explosive argument even though he reached number one again.

The only bright spot seems to be the album cover that the cheery middle-school student, Marinette, designed for him. Everything about it was him and she even added a smelly-sticker that had the whole ‘sweat and leather’ thing Rock ‘n’ Roll was about. Also the shades she gave him were pretty sweet. So he figures he’d personally give her some back stage passes to his latest concert as a thank you and maybe to see her again because her facial expressions are hilarious. 

Marinette arrives at the Palace to pick up the tickets and she practically falls over herself thanking him for the tickets. For convenient Plot Shenanigans, her sketchbook falls out of her bag while she’s thanking him and Jagged sees just how much talent Marinette has and where her true passion lies.


Imagine one thing leading to another and Marinette finds herself commissioned for a jacket for Jagged to wear at his next concert.

She makes the jacket and Jagged adores it. He loves it so much, he has to be talked out of making Marinette his personal fashion designer by Penny, his new contractor and Fang (though it’s definitely a close call and it’s only the fact Marinette hasn’t finished high school stops him [Education is important]).

So he does the next best thing. He hires her on a semi-regular basis.

Imagine Jagged and Marinette end up meeting often to discuss styles, colours, textures and general fashion choices.

Imagine Jagged hiring Marinette to make various accessories and clothes for various publicity events. (Though he does take into account of her schooling and doesn’t overwhelm her with commissions.)

Imagine Jagged Stone and Marinette becoming good friends to the point he gives her special behind-the-scenes access to publicity events so she can be inspired and he becomes something of a mentor when dealing with fame and publicity. She talks to him about the odd boy issue (he is no help at all because he just laughs at her) and Chloe being Chloe and how she gets discouraged about her designs occasionally.

Imagine Jagged bragging about the sweet, talented student that made his accessories for an award ceremony to other celebrities and on television. (He wanted her and her family to come too but it was a school night.)

Imagine Marinette wondering where all these commissions from celebrities are coming from and why Jagged looks a bit too pleased with himself every time she brings it up.

Imagine Jagged celebrating loudly when Marinette receives several summer internships from various fashion companies after seeing her talent even though she is so young.

Imagine Marinette’s fashion career taking off through various celebrities and public figures all adoring her designs . It becomes a thing where people begin to brag about having a 'Marinette Special’.

Imagine Jagged encouraging Marinette to push her limits and use her intuition to create the best designs possible for each of her commissions. (All of her customers love her for it.)

Just Imagine that it’s all Jagged Stone’s fault Marinette’s career takes off so early.

Submitted by @my-insanity-is-an-artform

Proud Father

Pairing: Robert Downey jr x daughter!reader, Bill Skarsgård x reader

Request: Can you please do a Robert Downey Jr. imagine where the reader is his daughter and she/he is an actor??? You are a slaying queen girl!!❤️❤️

Originally posted by theperkybuttofrdj

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The Way You Look Tonight..

Series: Tom Holland Imagines

Relationship: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Tom is in awe when you make your entrance at the event. Tom has a surprise of his own if he gets an award either way he wins..

Warnings: swearing cause I swear a lot IRL and so does Tom, and cuteness from his infatuation

Word Count:1,800+


[Reader’s POV]

“Tom I’m probably going to have to meet you there, my dress just got fixed and I have to go pick it up.. I can’t believe they just fixed it when it was supposed to be ready two days ago” Your voice full of frustration as you gathered your makeup on the counter. 

“Darling I’m sure everything is going to be fine and you’ll look stunning as always..” he tries to assure you but how your nerves were getting the best of you made you think otherwise.

“Tom this is the Oscars, I can’t look like rubbish next to you” you say setting your phone down putting it on speakerphone.

“I assure you that you won’t look like rubbish but if you do you’re my rubbish” he teases making you laugh a bit.

“Why aren’t you here at the house?” you ask turning on your curling iron. Grabbing your foundation you put liquid dots on your skin. Taking a beauty blender to bounce the product onto your skin. Thankfully the house you were staying in had an awesome sized bathroom.

“I.. uh I’m shopping for a bowtie last minute.. yeah that’s it” his voice uneasy making you raise a brow.

“Thomas, I know when you’re lying to me.. I packed your suitcase and I put a bowtie and a tie in your suitcase”  you stare at your phone waiting for him to respond. There was a slight pause before he continued.

“Oh it wasn’t for me.. I’m with Haz right now” he explains with a nervous laugh. Knowing him and Harrison it was probably true. 

“Alright baby, I have to finish getting ready.. I love you and will see you there okay? Zendaya is coming over to help with my hair”

“I love you more, tell her I say hello and not to burn you” his comment making you laugh before hanging up on that fool.

[Tom’s POV]

“Dude that was so fucking close” my breath shaking from the nerves. I hated lying to her,I’m not great with secrets.

“You’ve kept it a secret this whole time mate,you got this” Harrison smiles over at me from the chair he was sitting in.

“You sure this is going to go well?” I ask holding the box in my hand,my hand shaking slightly.

“Tom if you don’t do it I will make you,It’s about time you’ve done it too.. there’s no way she could say no, you two are head over heels for each other” He laughs rolling his eyes at me nerves. I open the box to see the diamonds glistening in the light.

“C’mon Tom, we need to get to the venue so I can take some pics of you” Haz punches my black suit clad shoulder.

“Y-yeah I got this.. plus my family came here to support me so I’ll get to see them as well afterwards” I walk along with Harrison out of the store. Thankfully they finished cleaning it today cause today was the day..


[Reader’s POV]

“That eyeshadow look is gorgeous, what products did you use?” Zendaya asks as you blend another color into your outer corner. 

“I’m using Tarte, I absolutely love their products” you smile taking another brush off of the counter. Dabbing the brush into the glitter shade rubbing it in your inner corner. 

    Her hands working at your hair adding another gem into the thin braid crown. The rest of your hair fell in soft waves down your back. The gems looking embedded into your hair making it glisten in the bathroom light when you turn your head. What is something that Zendaya can’t do? 

    Zendaya’s curls were put into a bun with a intense smokey adorning her eyes. She always looked flawless when it comes to events, a true queen in fact. Zendaya is one of your closest friends thanks to Tom introducing you to her. You wouldn’t know what to do if she didn’t give you advice on how to handle being involved with a celebrity. She was truly a blessing.

“You’re going to love it, tonight is going to be truly amazing” she smiles admiring her work on your hair. Picking up a hairspray can she sprays it lightly running her fingers through the waves.

“I think Tom is hiding something from me.. He’s been acting strange these past few weeks we’ve been here in LA” A gut feeling wouldn’t go away and you absolutely hated it. Zendaya’s hand is on your exposed shoulder giving it a squeeze.

“Tom is just weird sometimes, maybe he’s just nervous for the Oscars?” Her body turns in the mirror as she fixes the belt on her outfit. Readjusting it she gives you a reassuring smile in the mirror.

“You’re probably right, I’m going to go and get my dress on” getting up you walk past her heading towards the dress bag. 

    Grabbing your heels you slip them on. Unzipping your bag the dress hangs in full view in front of you. Slipping off your robe you take the dress off the hanger. Stepping into it and sliding it up your body slowly. The gems on the dress catching your eye making you smile.

    Running your fingers through your hair you turn slightly in the mirror. The dress looking like you were mother nature herself. The plunging neckline wasn’t provocative like the other dresses you tried on before this one. You guessed it was the flowers that added some innocence to the neckline.

“Woah” you look up to see Zendaya looking at you in the mirror. Her face looking at you in complete shock and awe.

“So I picked a good one?” you smile doing a small curtsey towards her. 

“You look breathtaking… let’s take some pictures then head over there” She quickly pulls out her phone aiming it at you. Posing you give her a smile as the flash goes off.


“Look it’s Tom’s girlfriend and Zendaya!”

“Ladies pose for us!”

“Look at that dress, turn to the side !”

“Zendaya which designer are you wearing?!”

“Zendaya take a picture with us”

“Go ahead and find Tom, I know how all the camera flashes make you nervous” Zendaya whispers down to you giving you a slight hug. Nodding you wave to the cameras before heading towards the doors. 

    The man at the doorway opens the door for you. Thanking him as you head inside to a room full of actors and actresses. Eyes looking at you made your heart hammer in your chest. Giving the people you know hugs as you make your way farther into the room.

    Chris Evans walks up to you telling you he last saw Tom downstairs with Robert getting drinks. He points over towards the staircase that went to a lower floor. Lifting your dress slightly so you don’t trip on it. Your eyes scan the room to land on the one person you were looking for. His eyes lock with yours in a stare that makes your heart skip a beat.


[Tom’s POV]

“So did you get the ring in time?” Robert asks me tapping his glass with mine. He takes a sip of his Scotch waiting for a response.

“Yeah, thankfully it was ready to be picked up in time for today” I laugh nervously at him. My nerves were still getting the best of me at the moment. 

   Murmurs and whispers catch my attention causing me to detach myself from the conversation. I look around to see some people looking in a certain direction. My eyes look up to see the most beautiful woman, my girlfriend to be precise. She looks stunning, absolutely breathtaking… 

    Walking away from Robert I head towards the edge of the staircase. She descends down the staircase as her dress drags behind her. Our eye contact not breaking as she gets closer and closer to me. My heart rate was rising from how she was making me feel. She reaches the bottom step looking down at me.

“You’re absolutely gorgeous,holy fuck” I breathe out looking at her figure in the dress. 

“You look very handsome tonight Tom” her smile melting my heart instantly. Helping her down the last step I pull her body close to mine. Connecting our lips in a longing sweet kiss. When she pulls away her cheeks are tinted a shade of pink.

“Now I feel like rubbish next to you” I laugh running my fingers through my gelled curls.

“Oh shut it you cheeky shit” she giggles taking my hand in hers bringing it up to her lips to give it a kiss. God I love this woman.

“C’mon darling, I want to show you off to everyone” his lips press against your forehead gently calming your nerves instantly.


“I just want to thank everyone in my life for supporting me through my acting career. My family has helped me tons with everything , Harrison has been one of the greatest friends I could ever ask for.. Now if my lovely girlfriend could come up here I want to say something special to you darling..” Holding my award I look over in the direction where she was sitting. I see her figure stand and make her way towards the stage. Setting the award down by the mic stand before I walk over to her.

“Tom… what are you doing?” she asks taking my hand as I helped her up the steps. Walking her over towards the center of the stage.

“Well I wanted to thank you the most darling, you were always there through everything since we first got together.. you saw me as a person rather than a celebrity,I love you so much for that.. Oh shit whats that!?” I freak out pointing behind her causing her to turn around. The crowd gasping in confusion at what’s happening.

“What the hell Tom ,why are you shouting?” She asks while her back is to me. Getting down on one knee I pull out the ring box opening it. 

    Her hands going up in confusion not knowing what I pointed at.The audience starts shouting for her to turn around. Her body slowly turns around to see me down on one knee. A big smile on my face as I looked up at her.

“Thomas Holland..” her eyes start filling with tears her hand covering her math.

“I want to you to always be there with me in the future.. I want to spend the rest of my life with you .. Will you marry me?” I ask as my heart pounds in my chest. The audience growing silent waiting for her answer. 

“Yes! Yes I’ll marry you Tom” she smiles making the audience clap and Zendaya screaming loudly in the background. I could see her at the corner of the stage recording.Putting on the ring her finger I stand up. She attacks me in a hug holding onto me as I spin her around. The audience of my co-stars peers and role models were experiencing another moment of mine that I will remember forever.

“I love you so much” Tears fall down her cheeks as she looks down at me. Her hands pull my face to hers sealing everything with a kiss.


Some characters in my book.

Miss Ava Tremain, Ellie’s governess and the bane of Master Jacob’s existence

Lord Jacob Temple, Ellie’s fake uncle and her Guard Master. Also the bane of Miss Ava’s existence.

And Ellie Temple/Matthews, the protagonist and Apprentice Guard.


Robert Pattinson talks about playing working class criminal character

So many movies tend to romanticize the criminal intentions of their character…their mother is sick… or whatever… and to do a character where their intentions are quite confused, even to themselves, it felt quite audacious and interesting” ~ Rob about playing Connie in Good Time

Robert Pattinson talks about working with brothers again in Damsel

“The Zellners, that was weird,and they are also acting in the movie as well. To do two brothers in a row,  very very strange coincidence. It hasn’t put me off siblings directors.” ~ Rob about working with directors/actors of his next movie Damsel

Robert Pattinson and Josh Safdie talk about Claire Denis

“I’ve loved Claire (Denis) for forever. It’s just one of those people I’d never thought, I didn’t think it was a possibility to do a movie with her. She has never done a movie in English. My career trajectory to end up doing the lead as well, it’s just so crazy, and probably her craziest movie. It’s definitely, it’s a fascinating experience.” ~ Rob

“When Rob first reached out to us, when the kind of joy or the humbling nature of knowing, (that) cos we have been watching what Rob has been doing and the auteurs he was shacking up with; it was kind of insane to be “Oh, now he wants to with with us?!“ It’s kind of crazy. I remember when we finished shooting Good Time, the last day he shaved his head, kind of like what he has now, it was to shoot Claire’s movie and it was 2 years ago. But I remember feeling “wooh, I can’t believe we get invited to this party,” in a wierd way and he’s doing a Claire Denis movie after our movie and that was quite humbling” ~ Josh

Josh Safdie on his heroes Connie & NIck, and the song by Iggy Pop 

“I find Connie specifically to be a winner that doesn’t win. You don’t get to see him win and Nick is the purity. I see Iggy Pop song in the movie; we had no idea what the lyrics were going to be when he sang them. So when he opened his mouth and said “the pure and the damn are one” I really saw his intepretation of the film, is like kind of our own, is that Connie is this damned character and Nick is this pure character and in a wierd way they are one, because they both can’t meet in the middle, they can’t be in the middle. And anyone who is not in the middle is a hero to me. So whether it is the far end of the spectrums”~ Josh

Robert Pattinson on being attracted to the frightening and dangerous part of the roles he play.

“I always find where in a script, they are certain sequences or even lines in it which are scary to say, and you realized it can potentially slip out of the world of the movie. And there’s certain things you can do in a movie, when the movie is released, you kind of have to stand by and go “I’m playing a character!”, yeah but you chose to play this character. I like that when it’s pushing the line of acceptability. And even the first draft of the script was that there was some lines where I don’t think we’d have necessarily gotten away with. But I think it’s always exciting cos it’s difficult to get things to cut through all the noise, and it’s difficult to make things which are a little bit frightening and feel a little bit dangerous and I’m definitely kind of attracted to that” ~ Rob with sky news

#Thank you Korita05x for all the videos

i wanna cry i love taylor bc over her career even tho the majority of her fans have been pleasant and wonderful there are inevitably always gonna be ppl who act like monsters and for any other artist that would probably ruin it for the rest of us but she just continues to trust us and go above and beyond for us anyway because she genuinely loves us and cares and knows that 99.9% of us would die before we made her uncomfortable or upset i Love her so much

Loving: Tom Holland x Black Actress

Requested: Reader is a actress with a small fanbase, she meets Tom they date and she is hit with racial slurs and hate. 

Warning: Racial Slurs…

You were on the set of your current movie waiting for the Director to call for places. You scrolled through your Instagram about shocked at the amount of new followers you had gained overnight and throughout the course of the day. 

You went to Tom’s page and smiled seeing that he posted a picture of you two. You liked it and put a heart in the comments. “Places!” You quickly turned off your phone and walked to your place.

“Tom, man you need to see this!” Haz showed Tom your page. His heart broke at the amount of hate you had received. He felt anger sweep over him as he read through the terrible comments.

She is fucking ugly!

Lol he’s dating a nigger

Fucking Coon

Tom could do SOOO much better!

He had seen enough and decided to call you. When your phone immediately went to voicemail he got worried that you had seen the comments, so he texted you. Love I am so sorry! Please call me!

Keep reading

I saw many people spculate that the reson Chloe is acting the way she does it’s because her father is neglecting her and insted of spending time with her he just give her stuff she wants.

Now, don’t get me wrong, he indeed spoiled her too much, but saying he only show his love in a materialistic way it’s not true.

I get why people think it’s true, we this more than once in other shows:

but I really don’t think this is the case with Chloe.

Mr. bourgeois was willing to come to Chloe’s class for the career day even tho he probably has a lot of work as a mayor (thing that Chloe seems to take as obvious):

and guess who didn’t came for the career day?

I understand that he probably has many work to do but if the mayor himself was able to make time for his daughter couldn’t he do the same?

This man did not hesitate for a second to give up on his position as the mayor of Paris when his daughter was seems to be in danger:

and he tried to act like a responsible parent and teach Chloe a lesson for blaming people with no proves:

as someone pointed out once, his look when prince Ali couldn’t join them because of his schedule shows that he think it’s important to give children time to have fun:

he let her join the juries but was logical enough to kick her out after what she done:

he gives her love and affaction all the time and even in front of other people:

he smiles when he talks about her and to her.

And now let’s talk about Adrien’s father:

hugs and affaction seems to be a big deal and they are rearly happen:

He didn’t make time for him even in his birthday and refused to let him have a party:

Adrien looks sad i their portret:

even when he does “appear” in his son’s calss activities, he doesn’t do that personally:

Adrien’s father seems to fit more to the “rich neglecting parent” motive than Chloe’s father.

and they both lost their mother.

Yet we can see how different they act:

Mr. Bourgeois isn’t the perfent father and he is spil Chloe too much. But I wouldn’t have call him “neglecting” or “showing her love only in a materialistic way”.

If Chloe really has a reason for her actions, it’s not the same as Pacifica and Diamond Tiara.

✨ Chyler Leigh appreciation post ✨

Chyler had an upbringing that was probably worse than even Lena Luthor’s, ending up lost and struggling with addiction by the time she was barely into adulthood.

She’s said so herself in multiple interviews.


She has still managed to become such a beacon of hope in spite of everything she’s had to endure and that makes me so happy you don’t even know.

She got clean with the love of her life, and is raising a beautiful family and managing a successful career in music and acting.

This magical rainbow unicorn sunbeam is the ultimate symbol of triumph and survival to me ❤️

And it’s also why I love watching her act- she pours so much of herself into her roles, and the emotion just oozes off the screen.

Chyler Leigh is the living embodiment of hope and you can fight me if you think otherwise.

Girls final season: Hannah & Adam

With the final season of Girls here (a show that there isn’t typically a disk sitting in my Blue Ray player ready to go) I am very sad. As I listen to the music used in the show, certain songs remind me of favorite scenes. Seriously, I feel like openly crying. (I probably will a few times before I get over it.) I am going to REALLY miss seeing new episodes, but at the same time, thankful that I was able to discover this show and the brilliant mind that is Lena Dunham. To have a woman listed as Creator, Writer, Director, Producer, Actress…we need to see a lot more of this.

In a recent interview, Adam Driver assured us that season 6 is “ending on a note that they can control, that it seemed to make sense. It’s not just an arbitrary ending.” Lena recently said her and Jenni made “hard” decisions this season. I used to think that I wouldn’t be satisfied unless Hannah and Adam got back together. I mean, after all, the show did spend a hell of a lot of time with the ins and outs of these two, but now I am thinking a show like this will probably not end easy in many ways and not in a “happily ever after” way either. I think we will see the girls grow, but at the same time, I am not so sure that includes Hannah, or even Jessa, ending up with anyone. The show is ultimately about these girls and their friendships after all, and in the long run, they really don’t like anything getting in the way of that friendship…..including a man.

For some reason, in season 5, the egomaniacal Hannah is the biggest mess ever. As an aspiring writer, we know about her endless desire to pursue interests and different experiences for a good story. This has led her at times to be self-centered and self-destructive, however, it seems like lately, she has been trying extra hard to just test everything. Showing her crotch to her boss, trying to blow Ray, the ridiculous fights with Fran (“Oh, Hannah wants to do something rude, disruptive, and inappropriate. What a twist.”) and her talent to bring unprofessionalism in the work place to (an albeit hilarious) new high, are a few examples of the more, irrational ways Hannah has been acting out. It was all heading towards her growing and taking a big step forward in her life. Besides where she wants to go, what she wants to do as she gets older, one truth she has to face, I believe, is her lingering feelings for Adam.

Adam. In the first season, he starts out as sort of a creepy, “emotionally tone-deaf” sex addict that Hannah was in pursuit of. We wondered why she was bothering with him as he was not exactly “boyfriend material”. He was working on homemade “wood working” in his work shop which was his mess of an apartment. (Not so sure the genius even had a plan on how to get that boat out of the front door if he ever completed it!) He was just this non-committal guy that Hannah would have sex with when he felt like returning her text messages or answering his phone. (For the first 6 episodes, we weren’t even sure if he owned a shirt!) None of Hannah’s friends had ever met him, and the first proof of his exsistance to Marnie (besides the occasional bruise on Hannah’s ass) was a dick pic he accidentally sent to Hannah that wasn’t even meant for her!

As a couple, we get to see Adam grow more as a character we care about. He is still quirky and intense, but having Hannah to give advice to, share his interests with and love, helped make him a better person. A person we cared about and found intriguing as well. When he does do something as normal as eventually say “I love you” or suggest that they move in together, Hannah (after being conditioned to expect anything from him from bad treatment to extreme sweetness) reacts like it’s way too soon for either one of them. It was all moving too quickly for her and I don’t think she trusted him yet, or wanted the newness of the chase to be over. Adam had his mind made up with his tunnel vision and he was in it “for the long haul” so of course, he has a hard time with their first break up: “My desire for you cannot be repressed. And to quit my pursuit would be to shirk self-respect and abandon my own manhood, and that’s not going to happen.” He wrote and performed horrible (hilarious) songs which he sent her to watch and was kind of stalkerish for a bit. It proved to be very hard for him to let go. Not too sure if he ever really does. So we have Adam trying to feverishly move forward without totally letting Hannah heal from his past not-so-nice treatment, and we have Hannah kind of playing with his emotions and not really being too empathetic to his state of mind.

Regardless of Hannah’s self-absorption (all the Girls seem to have this issue from time to time) and Adam’s sometimes callousness, there still seems to be some kind of connection that thrives between them. (“Hannah is accepting of my brand of difficult.”) Adam cleaned up his act some and we get to see him at AA and learn more about what made him tick. While he was dating Natalia, and ran into Hannah in front of the bar, it really did something to him. (I love the way Driver’s voice got all raspy as he asked her to put on some pants.) He, the ex-alcoholic, went back in and after seeing her, had to order an alcoholic beverage, which led to one of the eventual reasons of that relationship coming to an end. The song playing was Fiona Apple’s “Valentine” and it surely wasn’t about Natalia. (Adam messing with his ear like a nervous habit, odd coincidence to what Hannah was going through?) We know now that if Hannah can affect him in this way, then he obviously must have feelings for her. He never stopped loving her in his own way, and he is there for her hard core. As he ran to her across the city during her most desperate time, when she felt the most lost, never fails to bring tears to my eyes. (the heavy mood is lightened a bit when while running, he has to suggest that a driver “go suck a fucking spikey one”) With the dramatic music playing while he runs to Hannah is just so emotional and it is beautiful and very romantic, the most romantic scene ever in Girls. He is there for her. He cares for her. He loves her. “I was always here”.

By season 3 end, Sackler’s acting career turned into his new addiction. Hannah panics at some people warning her of how Adam is going to change with his new career instead of just trusting him and seeing how it all works out. She always has had a knack for taking bad opinions and advice to heart instead of trusting a bit more in herself. She develops a codependency on Adam just when he wants some space to learn his lines and do this right. He just wants his first show on Broadway to be perfect. Of this he assured her. She has a hard time sharing Adam with his new endeavor, because not all of his attention can be on her. When she finally gets accepted into the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, Adam does berate her for telling him at the wrong time, by which he means the wrong time for him. (Although, letting him know minutes before he hits the stage of his opening night show was probably not the best.) Once again, he takes it hard, as did Jessa, which I felt was selfish of her, as she always had a knack of simply disappearing from time to time on her friends. I never really understood the whole guilt trip on Hannah for accepting school and attempting to better her career. It was at this point that I wondered why the girls even kept trying so hard to stay friends. They are not even very nice to each other. Adam and Hannah never officially break up, but seeing the sadness and loss in his eyes as she left was rough. The morning she was leaving, he couldn’t even face saying goodbye. He pretended to still be sleeping. We realized that part of him would always love her.

After trying Iowa, Hannah found she didn’t like the distance away from Adam, (not real sure why they seemed to have stopped communicating) among other factors at the school, and decided to come home, just a month later. Upon returning to her apartment, she shockingly found out that Adam had gotten a new girlfriend and Hannah didn’t even know they’d broken up! Yes, at the same time it was left sort of open ended, but it didn’t seem to have taken him anytime at all to move on. This was heart breaking, her surprise and desperation, truly a very rough episode to watch. We find that Jessa knew about it the whole time while Adam was putting Hannah’s belongings in storage. To make matters worse, she had selfishly worked at hooking Adam up with Mimi Rose simply because she wanted to get with Mimi’s ex, Ace. Some friend, eh? It was so hard watching him basically tell Hannah that he was not in love with her anymore (but we knew better) and he was “trying something out". What a nice surprise to come home to! Mimi Rose was the opposite of Hannah to the extreme, and really didn’t ‘need’ him, she liked having him around. It was a one-sided relationship for the most part, Adam’s side. It was a bad choice for him as he discovered that he does want a partner that loves and needs him a bit more than that. (But maybe not as needy as Hannah) A while after that relationship ended, Adam turns around and begs desperately with Hannah to come back to him. “I just think I was confused, and I think I made a mistake. I miss you so badly.” He tries to reach for her. With how he hurt her so deeply, the wound was still fresh. With her self-respect in full force for once, Hannah says, “I can’t do that” and stands her ground despite Adam’s pleas. He insists “yes, you can” like it should be an easy choice. Did he think she would just come running back to him? With tears in both their eyes, (and ours) it was still nice to see her hold her own and turn him down. Truly a moving scene.

I really enjoy everything about the show, it’s all brilliant, but Hannah and Adam’s relationship, is to me, quite a lot of what makes Girls the show that it is. I cried with Hannah like a baby as her bottom lip quivered in heartache and betrayal when she realized at the play that Adam and Jessa were together. When he made eye contact with her, his look said so much. There was some pain there and just so much not said. Hannah tells Tally she was probably just using Fran to get over Adam and that Adam is the only man she’s ever truly loved. (a bit of foreshadowing)  She was feeling left out and confused, “The worst part is, I miss them both. I love them both so much I don’t know who to warn about the other one.”

The end of season 5, Adam (who sure has come along way since we first met him) has like the biggest, most outrageous reaction anytime Hannah is mentioned, it’s like he is trying so, so hard to break that connection to her. He tries to turn it into hatred and blame. Then there is Jessa, who at the same time, got a guilty conscience, dredging everything back up to the surface when he is trying to forget Hannah. Jessa, who constantly over the seasons has a knack for telling other people to “grow up” but seems to not be capable of taking her own advice. She and Adam butt heads over everyday things and can’t even get through babysitting his niece. When Jessa cannot illicit his total attention away from the baby after it barfs on her and she wants Adam’s help to clean up, (in mid-season four he did call her out on being manipulative) asks her to stop, “You’re an adult. She’s a baby. Why do you need more help than a baby?“ With the tension thick, Jessa takes it out on Adam which leads to an unnecessary (but entertaining) blow-out between the two. She blames him for getting between her and Hannah (were they ever truly friends?) and basically spells out their doomed relationship: “I’m a hateable kind of person. I don’t know why, I can’t help it, but I know, I know that I have principles and one thing I don’t do is steal people’s boyfriends. But you ruin that. Don’t you see that?! I’ll never forgive you. I will NEVER forgive you for that. We could die in the same bed and I will never forgive you!” I really don’t think there is any coming back from that, at least nothing long term anyway.

Hannah did show some growth with her story at The Moth Story Slam. She admitted, “I’m Hannah forever. No matter what I do. No matter whether I start a nuclear crisis with my emotions or if just sit back and chill and give someone a fruit basket. I can only control the mayhem that I create around me.” she told the room, explaining the note she left outside of Jessa and Adam’s door that read, “Good luck. I mean that sincerely. In perpetuity, Hannah.” However, she heard them fighting and was relieved to not be inside there. “I heard screaming and I heard my name and I heard madness. And I knew that I was free. At least for tonight.” she says. Hard to keep a dry eye. This was a huge step for her. When it comes to Hannah and Adam, I don’t think I have cried or felt more emotionally attached to fictional characters in all my life. (and I don’t think Frankie Valli has ever made me cry before).

In the season 6 opener, we do see a more thoughtful Hannah. We learn that the New York Times had her write her story to be published in their Modern Love column. She appears to still not be holding a grudge, but the same cannot be said about Jessa, (for some reason) as she refuses to read Hannah’s column. Adam on the other hand, read it with deep interest with a bit of a hurt expression on his face. Seeing their story in print did mean something as I think he realized some truths. (It’s the only time we see him looking serious, about anything, in the episode.)

Hannah still doesn’t seem entirely satisfied with her life, but she is on a new assignment away from NYC, where she becomes open and more relaxed. She is still silly, entertaining, awkward Hannah getting drunk on the dance floor, spilling drinks all over herself, pointing at the surf instructor/rapper and proclaiming “I know him! He’s my surf teacher! I’m gonna fuck him!” (a favorite moment and why we love her) She was able to forgo some of her usual rage impulses even after Paul-Louis admitted to having an open-relationship girlfriend. This was really a change in attitude, she was not happy about it but I think she did learn from Paul-Louis maybe something to think about:  “It’s so much easier to love something than to hate it, don’t you think? Love is the easiest thing in the world. Hate takes energy, loves makes vibes.”

We find Adam in an opposite situation. It seems he and Jessa decided to stay together, even as that means that they have been seemingly estranged from the rest of the group of friends. They are holed up in the apartment not even having the decency to get dressed when Ray comes over, or to answer a text, and they are just being obnoxious. Ray said why he didn’t want to go in there: “its repulsive” and “smells like they are always reheating fish”. (Are they doing drugs?) Not quite sure what is wrong with them. Kind of seems like Adam took a few steps backward. So, I am guessing he still has some emotional growing to do, which I am sure, will work it’s way out over the season.

Lena recently said “The show’s never been about that traditional connection, where it’s four best friends who just can’t get enough of each other. So to do a traditional everybody-gets-their-happy-ending finale didn’t feel right. At the same time, we wanted people to have the satisfaction of closure. I think we found kind of a creative way to do that. We’ll see if other people feel the same way.”  If she did feel that Adam and Jessa could make it, then they will. (However, eventually they would kill each other and we all know it’s only a matter of time before the next battle) Maybe no one “ends up” with anyone. Maybe Hannah does find the right man for her and it is not Adam. Perhaps Hannah doesn’t need or want a boyfriend for right now. Hannah and Jessa could rekindle their friendship and it doesn’t include any man between them or maybe this time their friendship is beyond repair. Adam could land a killer theater gig or movie role out of the state or country. All I know is how I feel, and for myself, after all the emotions and all the tears I have shared with Hannah and Adam, and with all that build up, shared history, and connection they seem to have, it’s just a lot of time spent on their story if they don’t figure it out.

My husband recently pointed out that Hannah shouldn’t get back with Adam, she deserves better, “Adam has been a dick.” Yes, he has and yes, he can be. “They have been abusing the shit out of each other for years,” Lena has said of unexpected support of Hannah and Adam as an OTP. Its been messy, sure, but people grow. Maybe they give it a try and are forced to come to terms that they would be heading down the same path and eventually keep hurting each other, making the difficult, yet, adult decision that they can’t be together. I am really leaning towards the no one ends up with anyone route. If not as a couple, I like to think that they will at least remain something to each other.

Anyway, I am pretty confident the love is still there in some form or another. To me that is partly what this show has been about. After everything they have been through, deep down inside, I will always feel they should finally be together…and happily ever after.

Morning sickness

Originally posted by lenaluhor

Request: Lena x reader: where Lena is pregnant with their baby and the reader is super over-protective of her

Lena had once again been struck with morning sickness this dreary Monday sunrise.

You begged her to call in sick from work so you could stay in your sweats and comfort her in the luxury of your own bed but she refused. 

She had yet to tell her employees about the pregnancy knowing that as soon as word got out that Lena Luthor was pregnant there would be an abundance or critics questioning if she was still capable of running L Corp and CatCo with people like Morgan Edge only egging them on. 

Kara and Sam were both aware of the baby and beyond thrilled for you two, they were the only one’s Lena trusted with such vital information. 

They both temtped Lena with taking some time off but if you could not convince her to do so, neither could her best friends. 

Lena pushed through her morning sickness and went to your scheduled meeting with a smile on her face. 

You and Lena sat in the board room, listening to Edge draw on about a new plot of land he planned on buying since Lena had stolen CatCo from him.

Twenty minutes into the meeting and Lena felt another wave of nausea hit her. 

She excused herself and hurried to the restroom. 

“I guess my presentation bored Miss Luthor,” Edge laughed to the fellow CEO’s sitting around the table. 

“Watch it Edge,” you muttered, glaring at him.

Edge grinned, happy with himself for getting under your skin and continued on with the presentation. 

Lena finally returned about fifteen minutes later and took her seat. 

“My sincere apologises for the interruption Morgan,” she said quietly. 

“Are you feeling alright Miss Luthor? You were gone for a while,” he said with faux care in his voice. 

You wanted to hold her hand to comfort her but you knew such displays were inappropriate in the workplace. 

“I’m alright, I believe a stomach bug is going around,” she lied to him.

“I see, for a moment there I was begining to think it was morning sickness,” he chuckled. 

“What would make you say that,” Lena said taken back. 

“Well I just heard a rumor that you and Mister Y/L/N were expecting,” he shrugged . 

Of course Edge knew, he always had a way of knowing. 

“Lena, is that true?” James asked her. 

“Yes James, I am pregnant but I was hoping to keep it under the radar for a bit longer,” Lena sighed. 

“Why’s that?” Edge questioned, “are you afraid people will see you unfit to continue with your job? Because if you ask me, I would find it a tad difficult to run two companies as well as raise a child." 

You had had enough of this, you stood up from your seat, "That’s enough Edge. Lena is more than capable of raising a child along side running both L Corp and CatCo and you know it.”

James could see how angry you were, he got up and grabbed your shoulder, holding you back.

“I know you are still throwing your little hissy fit over not getting CatCo but I swear, if you try to spread any false accusations about Lena I will burn your company to the ground,” you continued.

“Is that a threat Mister Y/L/N?” Edge questioned.

“No, it’s a promise,” you said fervidly.

Lena smirked, she knew you would do anything to protect her but this situation was starting to get out of hand.

“We should go,” she told you.

“I’ll walk you two out,” James announced.

The three of you stood in the elevator in silence until James spoke.

“I hope you know that CatCo will provide any aide you or the baby need,” he stated.

“Thank you James,” Lena said softly.

“You’re going to make great parents,” he added as the elevator doors opened.

Soon after you and Lena were back home, sitting on the couch with her in your arms.

“I’m sorry about the way I acted earlier,” you told her, “hearing Edge talk to you like that just set me off.”

“It’s alright Y/N, he deserved it, insinuating a woman can’t have a family and career at the same time like we live in the stone age,” she laughed. 

“You my love, are going to be the best damn mom and CEO anyone has ever seen,” you marveled.

“I don’t know, have you seen Sam? Raising Ruby on her own and running L Corp in my absence, those are tough shoes to fill,” she retorted.

“Alright true, Sam is in her own league of badass moms,” you chuckled, “but you and I, we’re gonna raise this kid right and show the cavemen like Morgan Edge who they’re dealing with.”

Lena leaned in, chastely kissing you.

“As long as I have you by my side I know I can do anything,” she smiled. 

anonymous asked:

what' your opinion about jane asher?

I have nothing agaisnt her. I never saw her works as actress but she was a beautiful girl. I don’t believe Paul was in love with her though. Their relationship was so ‘for media’. The Beatles had just arrived in London, they were working class boys who were starting to get some money and attend High Society stuff. Jane was bourgeois, her father was doctor and her mother was relative from royal family, and Jane usually appeared on media because of her career as actress. For a working class guy as Paul, she was perfect. A beautiful girl from high society and a famous guy who was getting some money but didn’t know how to act in rich people’s events. 

For media, it was also perfect. People would see Paul as the ‘good lad’ who had a serious relationship. The famous musician and the beautiful actress. Barbie&Ken. If people knew about orgies and stuff like this Paul wouldn’t get so much respect from that conservative society, and if he was always single, people would find it ‘strange’. ‘Is he gay??? Why is he always single??’. So Jane got some attention from media because of Paul, and Paul learnt how to act in high society. So I don’t believe Paul was in love with Jane. They don’t even seem in love in their pictures together

they kiss with open eyes????

also before paul and jane’s break up, paul believed that jane was cheating him, so instead of trying win her heart back, he made no effort to hide his affair with francis schwartz. paul was with francis at his home when jane caught them. it’s totally something you do when you love her and want her here, there and everywhere, isn’t it?

anonymous asked:

May I ask for a hc with MC coming home after a stressful week and how the RFA members would cheer up MC? Thank you so much :'))

Hey anon! Thanks for this request, it was really cute ; w ; Hope you like it!

♥ If you ever came back to the house upset or stressed, he’d know immediately. Like you don’t even have to tell him that you’re upset, he just knows. He’s had many stressful weeks at college so he knows the signs.
♥ He will hug you and press your head against his chest. He’ll ask you about what’s wrong and he’ll let you vent about it to him. There was an asshole at work today? Your professor yelled at you?? Talk all the shit you want about them, he knows the feeling and he’ll support you 200%.
♥ He’d offer to play video games with you to take your mind off of it. If you didn’t want to do that, he would just sit you down on the couch with him while you vented to him.
♥ IF YOU EVER STARTED TO CRY FROM THE STRESS, HE’D START CRYING TOO. Just seeing you in such immense amounts of pressure and stress makes his heart break. He would hold you and tell you he loves you so much all while crying.
♥ “I’ve had so many stressed out weeks too, but now I’m so glad I get to come home to you. You’ve done so much for me, now, I can exchange the favor for you, honey. I love you.”

♥ If you were acting off or upset, he’d ask you if you were okay. If you ever said you weren’t, he’d drop everything and just hold you.
♥ He would hug you and caress your head and tell you that everything will be okay and that he loves you.
♥ He would ask about how your day went and why it was so bad. He would just tell you about how tomorrow is a new day with new things to come.
♥ He would serenade you with love songs he’s written for you. They’re so heartfelt and adorable, they will calm you down so much.
♥ “My acting career was a stressful, rocky road for me at first, but things will get better. Just as they will now. I love you.”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Cynical ahead. And before anyone clutches their pearls for dear life, this is business, it's not personal. Caitriona sure was a good little soldier this last week. She even changed her sm header! Bets on which LG project she lands next hiatus?

No worries, Anon.  Cynics are welcome here.  I have no idea if she will land an LG project or not. However, I would like to give credit where credit is due.  Cait Balfe worked her ass off during premier week. In fact, it looks like she has taken charge of a ship (no pun intended) adrift at sea and brought it safely to port. Quite honestly, I think she has had a reality check and realized just how good a leading role she has.  Hollywood is not kind to women her age who want to be in movies.. She’s in her late thirties–mom role time.  Reese Witherspoon ( who won an Oscar) is playing a mom role in her new movie. Her other gig right now is a tv show.  TV however seems to be kinder to women over the age of 35.  Let’s look at Patricia Heaton (this is about her acting career not her politics).  She landed the role of Debra Barone on Everybody Loves Raymond at the age of 38.  She would go on to star in that role for 9 seasons. She would also win two emmys for Best Actress in a comedy series.   After Raymond, she would land the role of Frankie Heck in The Middle at the age of 51. The Middle will leave next year after NINE seasons.  That’s 18 solid years of television success.  She’s just one  example.  There’s also Jane Seymour who landed the Dr. Quinn Medicine woman role at the age of 42.

I don’ t know what brought about the change in her promotion of the show.  I do think about how absolutely put out she seemed on the red carpet at SDCC.  As anyone would have if his or her coworker was being a complete wanker (but that’s a different question). I think she realizes though that it’s an ensemble production and that no one person is greater than the show.  So kudos to her which says a lot because I’m not the biggest Cait fan out there. 

One more thing….please save your dissertations on how Sam was a one person promotion team for the show for years. I don’t care. He’s being a complete ass.  His job right now is to promote the show.  His movie has not wrapped production or been released yet.  Don’t count your chickens before they hatch, Sammy.

anonymous asked:

Curious why you figure Clarke/Eliza is under appreciated? Within theloo fandom altogether? Definitely. But within the Clexa fandom specifically the love for both our girls seems to be pretty equal. Was it always that way? No. And I think that was understandable. But now it all seems to be pretty equal. I see Eliza/Clarke getting so much well earned love from clexas, plus she doesn't get any of the hate Alycia does, also from clexas.

There’s definitely a very clear bias towards Lexa/Alycia still. Easily proved by the fact that there’s a lot more art, gif sets, etc about them. As for the so-called hate on Alycia, I don’t think it’s that so much as disillusionment for the way she handled the aftermath of Lexa’s death.

She chose to remain strictly professional — and do some ass-kissing (although, as much as we say otherwise, Lexa was, for all effects and purposes, Jason’s character) — instead of having a more active role in the whole… thing. I mean, I still think people read waaaaayyyyy too much into Eliza’s every tweet or lack thereof, but she definitely took a stand. I think Alycia didn’t understand, or didn’t want to — but we can’t expect a rich straight white girl who just wants to act to understand — what it all meant and much it would have meant to see her also speak out about it. But that disillusionment only happened because people always expect too much from these actors, who despite their aura of… something-ness, are literally just people and definitely not perfect. Putting them on a pedestal is not healthy — for us and for the actors themselves. You can’t expect perfection from a human being. The problem is that people often forget that — so when Alycia didn’t meet those surreal standards of perfection, people suddenly woke up to reality and some were angry about it. It’s the Syndrome syndrome — when you discover that your hero isn’t really a hero; they’re human, with human flaws and human shortcomings. I don’t think we can fault Alycia for not wanting to get involved and preferring to remain strictly professional, though. It’s a choice. I’m not going to deny, however, that the Clexa fandom could have used better understanding of the cultural zeitgeist of Lexa’s death or however you use that fancy word.

But again, how can you fault someone for being 100% professional? Besides, after the fiasco of the Copenhagen Con and those awful leaks, you can expect her never to show up, Clexa-wise, again. There’s a reason why her friends say that her fans are crazy — and not in a good way. We need to stop putting people on a pedestal and start realising they’re human. And some are straight (therefore not invested in fighting our fight) and just want to act. Alycia never asked to be a gay icon.

TL/DR: There’s still a bias towards Lexa/Alycia and I don’t think anyone in the Clexa fandom hates on Alycia, I think they’re just disillusioned from the way she handled the reaction to Lexa’s death. Still, we can’t fault her for choosing to remain 100% professional and not get in the middle of anything that might harm her career. Can’t expect her to understand. Anyway, point remains: Clarke and Eliza deserve a lot more love than they currently get (especially from blorkes).

Just a Kid P.2

It’s been a few months since I last talked to Luke, the boys or his family. I see him wherever I go. Even as simple as going to grab the mail or opening a door. Leaving the house was more difficult, especially when you’re starting to show. I wanted to make the most of my time outside before I turned into a watermelon.

“Hey! You alright?” my friend asks as she puts a hand on my shoulder.

I jump at her touch, “Sorry what?”.

Maybe it was the baby brain or I was reminiscing about the past. Before life got complicated.

“You’ve been staring across the street for a good couple of minutes. What is going on with you?” (Y/B/F) says.

I look to my best friend who had a worried expression on her face. I loved that she was here for me, yes I wanted Luke here to help me with the baby. I didn’t expect him to stay, everything was tossed into the air at that point. You stay or you go. Him leaving though was a lot harder than I thought.

“Luke got his lip pierced there” I nod in the direction of the building.

I turned my head to the very edge of the block and point (Y/B/F) in the opposite direction, “There was our first date and our first kiss”.

I chuckled softly at those memories. We were both new when it came to dating so we didn’t have a clue on how we were supposed to act. The kiss wasn’t exactly how we both imagined it would be, but he made it up at the second date.

“You know I actually liked him,” (Y/B/F) blurts out, causing me to look at her.

“He always did treat you right. But him bailing on you right now changed my mind. (Y/n) I know you still love him but -” she stopped her sentence.

The store started to get louder which gave better chance of people noticing me, noticing that I wasn’t just a party of one. I vowed that I wouldn’t jeopardise Luke’s career. He and the boys have enough people on their back as it is, it wouldn’t be right.

“I think it’s time we get you home” my friend says, pulling me close to her. I give her a nod as we exit the small store and walk down the block to her car.

I wasted no time jumping in the passenger seat as she joined me in the drivers. It wasn’t a far drive to my house but it’d be awhile.

As the car jerked forward I pulled myself into a ball, letting the tears flow. I’d held these in too long, even when my eyes are closed I still seen the past and a perfect, dreamy future. It wasn’t real, it wouldn’t be real.

“(Y/n), hey calm down” my friend pleaded.

I shook my head, “No I can’t, I just can’t. (Y/B/F) I need him so much. I am trying, I really am but I love him and need his support. I can’t look anywhere that he isn’t there. I’m a mess, such a mess”.

“I’m here, I know that isn’t exactly what you want. But I promise as your best friend I will never ever leave your side”.

I sat up and looked up at her. I was grateful for her, she has been amazing through all the mood swings, the sickness, the cravings, every little thing. (Y/B/F) was trying her best to take over things I wish Luke could have done.

“Alright, I’m taking you one last place” she sighed throwing her car back into drive.

“I really want to go home (Y/B/F)” I glanced a pleading look at her. She remained silent, proving she was determined.

I sighed and turned my attention to the window. The sun was setting, its colors seemed so calming. It seemed like the only piece of calmness I’ve had in awhile. Even though if it brought back unwanted memories I still enjoyed it, for the most part. I’d started to fight between staying awake, soaking up the beautiful sunset or getting little to no sleep.

I had a bun in the oven, that loved to move around when ever their moms eyes shut. I loved my little angel, I would never blame them for Luke and I splitting up. This baby was my decision to keep. I love Luke, he helped me create this small human, another for me to fall in love with.

I am a mom-to-be and when I finally bring my child into this world I will prove I am be a good mother. Not just to everyone doubting me on this journey, but to me, even Luke. I don’t want to woo him back to me. I just want him to realize that I can do things just as much as he can.

“And we are here” (Y/B/F) says nearly making me burst out of my skin.

“Why are we here?”.

“She at least deserve to know,”.

I look to the house that held more memories than my own. My heart pained, as I gawked at it.

“What if she calls Luke?” I ask.

She moves her arms around, “Then she calls Luke, just get up there”.

I huffed, “Oh and say what? Hey haven’t seen you since your son left me with your grandkid? Who knows what will happen”. She quickly shrugged.

It was obvious we wouldn’t be leaving until I talked to them.

There was a knock at (Y/B/F)’s window. She gulped down air as the window unrolled to reveal, one of his brothers.


“(Y/n)? What brings you here?” Jack asked with a small smile on his face.

“I just wanted to talk to your mom, is she home?” I fiddled with my fingers.

He hummed out a confirmation that his mother was indeed inside that house. I took a deep breath in as I looked at my (Y/B/F).

“Are you coming with?” I asked sheepishly.

“Yeah, I’m coming” she said with a warm smile.

As we exited the car Jack was quick to join the tention. I hoped this would be quick but with this big of a surprise who knows.

“Mom, you’ve got visitors” Jack calls out as opened the door for us.

After giving a quick thank you to Jack. I stepped in, getting a wave of memories. I wished I wasn’t here but (Y/B/F) is right. I had to be here.

“(Y/N), what a surprise! What brings you here?” Liz says, ushering me into the house.

Everything about this visit felt wrong. We shouldn’t have stopped here, this, all this was a mistake. I felt sick my mind fogged together, who knew if it was the baby or the jitters.

“What’s wrong honey? You look like you’re going to be sick?” Liz asked.

“You might want to sit down for this” I warned as I helped her to the couch.

Hey guys here is (finally) part 2 of Just A Kid. Sorry for it being up late!

For those of you who haven’t read the first part click here

If you like this click here to see my other writings.


in honor of dance moms ending, here’s my favorite group dance. or at least, one of my favorites. 

i love this dance because watching it, i didn’t think, oh boy, another maddie solo with backup dancers. which, let’s be real, a LOT of the group routines were just that. but this one, the fullest group they’ve ever had, was beautifully nuanced and featured every girl at some point, ever so subtly, which makes it worth a group routine. to me, if a dance is just gonna be a soloist with backup dancers, there’s no need to make it a group dance. it should just be a solo. this dance was a real group dance. plus, love her or hate her (but def hate her mom), payton was always lovely to watch. asia was lovely. brooke and paige were lovely. 

these girls, plus those that came later like kalani, jojo, camryn, brynn, etc., these girls were and will be the heart of the show. these girls are the reason people tuned in. not the drama of the moms, not screeching abby, these girls are what kept people tuned in. i wish them the utmost happiness in their lives, whether that be following a career in performing and acting and modeling or going to college and teaching recreational dance on the side whilst promoting skinny people tea on instagram, whether it be big budget films or indie pet projects, whatever it is, i hope these girls are happy and healthy.

thank you chloe, nia, brooke, paige, maddie, mackenzie, vivi-anne, payton, kendall, asia, kalani, jojo, brynn, camryn, as well as the minis and the other guest dancers over the years.