Could you talk about the issues of Supergirl being with that one guy, mon el? I have only seen very few episodes of s1 and would like to know what to expect before i decide if I will watch the rest. Thanks so much in advance! ;)
ooooh yes I could talk about this all day tbh!
So first of all, and I don’t see this talked about a lot anymore unfortunately, but I just really hate how he replaced James as Kara’s love interest out of nowhere (which was plain racist tbh). She was in a relationship with this really great guy who was supportive of her and who actually listened to her and respected her and there were just good together. But then the writers just decided “ah no you know what?? we’re gonna get rid of James and make Kara break up with him for literally no reason and make her be with a white guy instead” even tho Mon-El as a character just doesn’t even begin to compare to James Olsen and doesn’t deserve Kara like he did. Honestly the entire situation is just completely absurd and I hate that it contributed to James getting sidelined on a show where he used to be one of the main characters.
And even if we ignore all that (which we shouldn’t of course) Kara x Mon-El is still the worst couple on TV at the moment because basically Mon-El is just a whiny fuckboy who used to be the Prince of Daxam which was a sexist planet with some kind of medieval ways of life where he actually owned slaves and had even less respect for women than he does now. Even his first appearance was very violent tbh and his and Kara’s relationship started with him disrespecting and insulting her and yet they somehow still ended up together.
What happened was that he’d only just came to Earth and didn’t really have anyone so Kara kind of took him in and helped him. Which would be fine if it’d just involved helping him adjust to life on Earth as an alien but then she also had to deal with him constantly being disrespectful towards her and lots of other people and she had to explain to him every time why what he was doing was wrong. So you know, you have that whole “woman fixes man” trope which is frankly getting kind of annoying and out of hand. But that’s not all, because despite having Kara trying to make him see why it’s not okay to keep acting the way he was on Daxam he’s still not really making any progress??
This is a guy who clearly can’t handle the fact that the woman he’s in a relationship with is capable of so much more than he is. It’s like a supernatural version of a couple where the man doesn’t feel masculine enough because his wife makes more money than him. First of all, Kara is an actual superhero, she can do anything and she can handle things so much better than this little boy who just came to Earth and is still learning how to use his powers. But he still keeps meddling and doesn’t respect it when Kara tells him she can take care of a situation. Once after he did it and got in the way of Kara doing her job and ruined everything he said that he was “defending Kara’s honor” lmao. They had an argument and Kara told him she didn’t need his help and just wanted him to respect her and he still didn’t seem to understand. And after Winn told him the same thing and said that Kara can take care of herself because she’s capable of anything, he was just like “Oh but then what is left for me??”. like????????? I don’t know just being a decent person would be a good start???
Also omg his sexism!!! He literally says things like “it was easier on Daxam where I could just objectify women and get away with anything” wtf. He isn’t unlearning all his prejudice he learned on Daxam, he’s just looking for evidence of same prejudice on Earth to justify his gross rhetoric. After he and Kara had an argument over him lying to her for months and months about who he was he still didn’t want to admit why he was wrong and all he said was that he did research on how relationships work on Earth and found out that “by this time the girl usually forgives the guy for whatever stupid thing he’s done”. Tbh he says a lot of gross stuff that makes me wanna put my head through a wall.
And you know I would even be fine with his character if that was just some 15-year-old boy under Kara’s wing, not her boyfriend. He was actually the first one to develop feelings for her and when she figured it out she got freaked out and told him she didn’t want to be with him. But you know of course as time passed the writers made Kara “fall in love” with him too even tho I still can’t comprehend why on earth anyone would be attracted to that whiny ass baby I mean it’s just not realistic?? What makes me even more mad is that they used that sickening “guy chases girl who isn’t interested in him at all until she convinces herself she reciprocates his feelings” trope (I hate that trope). The problem is that not only is that trope sexist and annoying but it also contradicts what they did in season 1 where they actually didn’t make Kara develop romantic feelings for Winn who admitted he was in love with her. It was so nice to see a woman being allowed to not like a man back so it’s just incredibly upsetting to see Kara being forced in a relationship with a guy she originally had no interested in. It’s such a huge step back tbh.
Mon-El as a character is also kind of violent and likes to threaten people. And he doesn’t seem that bothered by that fact that he used to own slaves until Kara points it out. He also escaped Daxam before it got destroyed by letting everyone else around him die and we still didn’t get to see him reflecting on that and feeling some kind of remorse. When he first came to Earth he was just lazing about and continuing to behave the same way he lived on Daxam. He didn’t care about anyone and didn’t want to help people despite having superpowers. He only decided to try to become a superhero because it would let him be with Kara, not so much because of his own calling. Basically anything that can be classified as “character development” for him (lmao) is tied to Kara in a sense that if he does something good it’s just to impress her, apologize to her, etc. As a person he isn’t really changing that much and continues being gross. (with some exceptions I guess, but they are not enough tbh)
I feel like I’m still forgetting something but the problem with Mon-El
is that when you watch their storyile there’s nothing that makes you
feel like it’s a good relationship or that Kara is actually in love with
him. There’s no respect, there’s no romantic chemistry, there’s hardly
even friendship, literally nothing about this couple is good. Which
becomes even more noticable when you compare their relationship to
Kara’s relationships with all of her friends. Literally everyone treats
her better than he does?? (Esp Lena Luthor, she should be with her). It
just!!! it makes no sense!!!
Ugh, okay this is already waaaay to long but I also want to mention that Kara doesn’t really let him get away with all this stuff. She does call him out all the time and doesn’t put up with his bullshit which is why they argue in literally like every episode. There are things said in the show that point out how wrong this situation is which sometimes makes me think that the writers are doing this on purpose and actually want to show Kara get out of this mess of a relationship but that’s not likely to happen and so far this has been a very bad example for young girls watching this show. Right now it’s showing them that no matter how great and independent you are you’re still not allowed to turn down a man who’s being an ass to you but says he’s in love with you. Kara deserves so much better than this and it’s just not fair to anyone.
Tbh there are people who explained it much better than me with illustrations and quotations and everything but I hope this helped :)