i just have a lot of feelings about this character okay

anonymous asked:

hi. i’m kinda nervous right now because i’m starting to develop feelings for another character which is totally okay. i’m nervous because this character canonically is married and has a family and idk. i just feel bad to have these feelings towards him? i’m not sure what to do. ;;

Hiya!! I completley understand where you’re coming from anon, I used to get those feelings when it came to some of my F/o’s that were in canon relationships as well. The way i stopped feeling nervous/bad about it was kind of like how a lot of people do actually; acknowledging that the universe where I am with that certain F/o is an alternate universe to the canon universe where they’re in their canon relationship. So in the universe where you have feeling towards him/are in a relationship with him is in a alternate universe to the canon one where he has a family!! So therefore you can be with him in your universe and his canon family also has a version of him in their universe and everybody is happy!! I hope i worded this okay and actually made sense,, and I also hope this helped a little anon!! <3 <3 <3

This is barely coherent because I’m exhausted but

I FIGURED OUT WHAT SEEMED OFF ABOUT LANCE IN SEASON 4

So first in season 3 we see the relationship they’ve been building up between Keith and Lance for like 2 SEASONS really blossom. Like they’re BFFs. Lance is Keith’s impulse control. Keith is Lance’s comfort. They’re all cool and stuff.

Then, in 4.01 Keith leaves. Lance thinks joining the Blades will make Keith happy, so he’s like, okay cool. Then Pidge goes to find Matt and comes back with this guy who makes bad jokes and flirts with Allura (sound familiar?) but is also super smart and mature and good at fighting and stuff. I don’t think it’s too much of a reach to say this is Lance’s worst fear –– someone shows up who’s like him but ‘better’, more worthy of his friends’ attention, meaning he gets rejected. But no big deal, right? Ain’t no one rejecting him yet.

But then when Matt flirts with Allura (in like the dorkiest way possible omg save him) she blushes and doesn’t insult him or anything, which for her is responding pretty positively, or at least moreso than she does with Lance. And then Shiro (y’know, Lance’s hero) is all MATT?? I LOVE MATT!! And then Matt forms the Tech Nerd Dream Team™ with Hunk and Pidge, Lance’s best friends from the Garrison. (Basically, Matt is a lot like Lance, but ‘better’ and adored by people the way Keith was.)

The next time we see Lance, instead of being his social butterfly self and getting to know the new guy, he’s holed up in his room in the dark in the middle of the day, looking tense and marathoning video games.

Okay, though. Maybe that’s okay. People play video games. No biggie. But first of all, that doesn’t seem like Lance. He’s the social guy. He’s the last person I’d expect to be holed up in his room playing video games in the dark in the middle of the day, especially when a cool new person just showed up. Lance loves people. Lance loves getting to know people (see: Taking Flight, The Depths, the Voltron Show!, Changing of the Guard, and literally every episode with new aliens).

But even if you disagree, consider this: in the Paladin Handbook, Crystal Venom, and Eye of the Storm, we see that when Lance has time to himself, he uses it to relax (napping, chilling with a good lemonade, going to the pool). There are two ways people spend free time: relaxation and stimulation. Video games are definitely a form of stimulation. When are you more likely to choose stimulating activities, even if you’re more into relaxation in your time off? When you’re trying to distract yourself from something.

^ picture by breeceesall (So sorry!!)

(Lance is answer choice D. I accidentally originally said B because I just glanced at it and that was a mistake, thanks to celestialdefenders for pointing that out!)

(By the way, side note: when Allura and Coran come to get Lance to milk Kaltenecker and they all leave the room, he says something like, “Okay, let’s get this over with”… and it sounded… off to me? Like he was covering up the insecure layer and going back to business… I dunno maybe I just heard it weird, I’m not really counting this as a point.)

The last thing Lance would do is tell anyone about all of this inner turmoil. After all, the only times he voices or even admits to himself his own insecurities are to strangers (Escape From Beta Traz) and to… well, Keith (Tailing a Comet, the infamous leave the math to Pidge scene). Who’s gone.

And I don’t think it bothers Lance as much when he has stuff to keep his mind off it (in the Voltron Show, they’re doing his favorite part of the war effort. Of course he seems happy and lighthearted!). But.

Pidge and Hunk were already starting to distance themselves from him and form their own li’l Tech Nerds Unite team as early as season 1. Now they have Matt to further finish off the new-and-improved Garrison Trio, this time without Lance. They definitely aren’t doing it on purpose, and probably don’t even realize that they’re doing it. Obviously everyone loves Lance. But they don’t show it, because they don’t realize they have to. He seems so happy and confident. But to Lance, I can see how it would seem like Pidge and Hunk have replaced him.

And now Keith, who was quickly becoming Lance’s closest friend, strongest teammate, and the most likely to understand what he’s going through, has left. Meaning Lance is, for all intents and purposes, alone.

Dude, if I were Lance, I’d be sitting in the dark marathoning video games too.


EDIT: wingedkeith made a really good point and said I could add it in!

“I just wanted to add on something: at the end of season 3, we see lance’s insecurities as he claims that he’s the “one pilot too many” and says he’s going to step down. So this boy already feels sort of useless, and then Matt comes along and seems to “replace” him in every aspect with the team. I’m not really sure what we can draw from that, but it’s something I noticed and thought you’d also find it interesting that it isn’t just season 4 where Lance starts to feel this way, but season 3 as well, and that means it’ll probably carry over into season 5, where Jeremy (I think?) said that Lance will have a pretty big character arc.”

Further proof that this part of Lance’s arc has been a long time coming. Majorly in season 3 and even before then in Escape From Beta Traz, he has always felt like a seventh wheel. This started out as really subtle and it’s been getting less and less so. Which means Lance’s insecurities will probably definitely be a really big factor later on!

Unfamiliar with Miles Morales?

Saw that trailer of Spider-man: Into the Spider-verse, but you do not know much about Miles? I got you, fam.


Okay, this is going to be really thorough because Miles is under the pen of Brian Michael Bendis. If you are unfamiliar with Bendis’ style of writing, then I’ll explain it to you. Bendis is not a fan of the complete comic book. What I mean is that he will not wrap up a story in one or two issues because he focuses on developing aspects of the plot such as characters, their motivations, and the overall nuances to the world around him. Bendis displaces immediate action in favor of overall plot. He sacrifices pacing for development and most critics of his point out that sometimes they aren’t getting a complete comic book instead it just feels like a part in a story. I say “buy volumes, asshole” or just appreciate how well defined the world is.

Anyways, here we go.

Miles is a Black Latino American born in Brooklyn and is the son of Rio Morales and Jefferson Morales, formerly known as Jefferson Davis. Miles has an Uncle Aaron who does not get along with Jefferson nor Rio for reasons I won’t specify at the moment. Miles’ story begins when his mom and dad drag him to a Lottery. What kind of Lottery, you ask? Well…

A lottery that poor inner city kids enter into to receive private school education so that they actually have a chance at a decent life instead of thrust into Public School Zoning where they will most likely get shot at, join a gang, do drugs, and/or receive poor education. This is not made up. This actually happens in real life. Notice how there is a lot of people of color here? And before some asshole makes the remark that this is a handout, these kids are gifted and had to take a test to be entered in the lottery. Miles and a lot of these kids passed so they do possess the intellect to get in these schools. They don’t possess the money however. Anyways, Miles gets his lucky number drawn, 42(Jackie Robinson’s Baseball number if you don’t realize the symbolism), and he becomes enrolled in Brooklyn Visions Academy.

You’d expect Miles to be happy, but no one wants to be that jackass to be happy during someone else’s funeral or will reading. Not a great analogy, but you have future? Great. Everybody else is just screwed though? …Okay? Yeah. So Miles decides to tell his Uncle Aaron the news and he is proud of him. He mentions that he has an opportunity that he and Miles’ dad didn’t have when they were growing up and tells Miles that this is a ticket out of this cesspool a.k.a the hood…not what culture appropriating white people call the hood or I’m talking motherfucking get your shit janked Hood.

Miles sits down on a couch while he and Aaron are talking and he notices a pack with a mysterious red case.Aaron decides to get his nephew a Popsicle and notices that Miles is messing around with his stuff. Aaron acts all sketchy and quickly tells Miles that it is nothing when prompted and takes the case while handing Miles the Popsicle. Of course, Miles completely ignores the sketchiness of his Uncle because fucking Popsicles, man. His Uncle leaves him for a bit and Miles just chills out on the couch eating his swirl orange and lemon flavored treat. Oh yes, this is the life. Your parents are proud of you because you did something. People giving you popsicles and shit. Nothing can ruin this moment. He woke up this morning feeling like he got to thank God. He don’t know why, but this day was feeling kind of odd. 5-Oh did not even do no flexing. Sheeeyat, they did not  even look in a brother’s direction. No Stop and Frisk in this bitch! Today was a good day.

Well shit.

That is right. A mysterious spider with the number 42(symbolism) on it’s thorax bites Miles. He freaks out and flings that eight legged fuck large motherfucker off his hand. Miles then trips over his Uncle’s coffee table and begins to have a seizure. His Uncle Aaron finds him on the ground as Miles begins to pass out. Miles wakes up and finds his Uncle tending to him. Apparently, Aaron had to call daddy Morales and Papa was about to stomp his foot up in Aaron’s ass.

Miles freaks out while Aaron and Jefferson are arguing and he decides to runaway from the commotion. Jefferson notices that Miles and missing and decides to go after him. He heads out the apartment and sees a swathe of people, but no little Miles. He heads out into the crowd, but there is a faint voice calling out to him that he doesn’t notice. As Jefferson keeps looking, Miles stands up and notices that something changed in himself.

Miles panics and begins to run away. He sees a pair of handymen carrying a T.V. in front of him and he is going full speed at them. 

Motherfucka got hops like MJ. That is like a 72 inch leap. 6 feet in the air. Kobe be like, “Dayuum.” The crowd impressed with the nastiness stops and looks at the boy only for him to turn invisible. People freak out and Miles gets away from the crowd. He eventually meets up with a bunch of teenagers who are standing in front of an apartment. One of them tries to rob little Miles of his bookbag. Miles, not having their shit, grabs him by the arm and clings to his belongings for dear life. Something happened when Miles grabbed the little bastard and the bully stepped back in feeling something is wrong. All of the sudden, a surge of electricity courses through his body and the asshole is knocked out. The other teens watched the event and Miles feeling all big and bad yells out the teens to leave him alone…and then he runs away like a dork.

Eventually Miles meets up with his best friend, Ganke(pronounced Gain-Key). It also might be a nickname for Gankeyama. Regardless, Miles tries to show Ganke his power to turn invisible and well..

Ganke is not too impressed. Failing at the task, Miles inadvertently touches Ganke’s Lego construction that he was working on before Miles arrived at his place and…

This nigga did not just…

Oh hell no. No joke, I would have fucked Miles’ shit up if I were Ganke. Anyways, Ganke is impressed with the display in spite of Miles wrecking his hard worked on Lego construction. A really fucking impressive Lego boat. With sails and everything. Miles lucky that he is a friend because shit would have gone down. 

Miles is not particularly thrilled that he has these new abilities. You see, in the Ultimate Universe having powers or even being a mutant sucks after Magneto and Dr.Doom decided to flood New York. Think like being a Muslim after 9/11. Yeah that bad.

Ganke and he are talking until Papa Morales arrives and takes Miles away. He is a little peeved that Miles ran away from him earlier, but they have a little father-son talk in New York Central Park. Jefferson tells Miles that Uncle Aaron is a bad person and is a cat burglar. He also tells Miles that Aaron has been and jail…and so has he.

Could you imagine telling your son that? They are raised to believe that only bad people go to jail and police are their friends. Then you have to tell them that you were a criminal. You were a bad guy. It is a conversation that you never want to have with your kids, but they have to know.  Miles is amazed, but Jefferson is annoyed. His words?

So Papa Morales hates Mutants or people with super powers in general. Miles thinks he is a mutant and he knows he has super powers. Oh shit, character dynamics. Miles gets taken home by Grumpy Morales and then he gets a text from Ganke at night.

Miles has spider powers. And then the plot thickens…or thins…or lengthens? Whatever. Anyways, Ganke immediately comes over after Miles presumably texts back telling him what he just did and wants to see it from himself. Miles shows him.

Of course, Ganke is stoked that his best friend is Spider-man. After discussion, Miles and Ganke decide to go to Aaron and ask where the spider came from. They go to his apartment only to find the place emptied out. 

Well that is not strange or peculiar for a man to empty out his apartment after a day? Anyways, that is not important to you right now.

They head back out and then they see a building on fire and the fire department trying to rescue a woman in distress.

In an act of heroism, Miles saves a woman and a little girl. He should be really proud of himself right? 

So yeah, Miles doesn’t become a superhero because he rationalizes that there is already a Spider-man around. He can see the writing on the wall with how dangerous it is. He is scared. He is afraid. So Miles decides to live a normal life and goes to school. He does his homework and just lives his life.

And then, he gets a nightmare that Electro shocks him to death. 

His Resident Assistant wakes both Ganke and Miles up and tells them to go to the auditorium. They get the news.

Well shit, man.

Miles decides to help Spider-man. Someone busted a cap in Spider-man red and blue ass and it also turns out Spider-man is fighting the Sinister Six while shit is going down in New York for reasons that I won’t bother explaining. Miles eventually arrives in Queens, in front of Peter’s home.

But it is too late.

Miles feels bad because he feels like this is his fault. He feels that he was coward for not trying to reach Spider-man. Maybe he could have helped him. He was given these powers for a reason and he chose not to use them and now Spider-man is dead because he was scared of his dad. He was scared of what others would have thought. He didn’t take responsibility and now Peter Parker is dead. 

Damn. Of course, Ganke puts in a different perspective. 

Miles and Ganke go to Peter Parker’s funeral where there are hundred of people gathered around. And they witness the impact, Spider-man had on people. They witness Aunt May and Gwen are stopped by a little girl who tells Aunt May that Peter rescued this little girl from a fire and she did not die because of him.

Miles calls over Gwen Stacey and asks why he did what he did. She shrugs him off at first still visibly upset. But eventually Gwen Stacey gives him this answer.

This is the connection between Miles and Peter.  Through people who knew Peter, Miles becomes inspired just as Spider-man hoped his message of Great Power, Comes Great Responsibility. Just as that message was passed onto to his fans, the message is passed onto Miles. We will never personally know Peter Parker, but we are inspired by him all the same.

So Miles decides to redesign a costume and try his hand at crime fighting. Of course, Miles can’t sow so Ganke buys him one.

So Miles has the costume, the powers, and now all he has to do is just walk out there and do it, right?

Nope.

Of course this doesn’t deter the little guy and he decides to keep at it until he gets a better costume. Although there are still people pissed that Miles is wearing Peter’s costume.

Spider-woman is pretty pissed that someone just decides to take up the mantle. So she confronts the new Spidey on top of a building. She accidentally knocks him out, captures him, and takes him to SHIELD headquarters. Miles wakes up to Iron Man, Hawkeye, and Nick Fury, with Spider-woman of course, watching him behind a force field. 

That is right, Miles. Plead the fifth. 

Nick Fury goes on to tell Miles that Aaron is also the Prowler. He also tells him that he needs a new costume if he wants to keep doing this. Of course,  this interaction gets interrupted when fucking Electro busts out of prison, again. Seriously, why do they still keep villains in the same place where SHIELD headquarters are? Did they learn nothing?

Iron Man, Jessica Drew, and Hawkeye engage Electro to no avail. Electro is hellbent on killing Nick Fury so instead of trying to escape, he sticks around for his own personal headhunt. Of course, he is shocked(see what I did there) to see Spider-man still alive.

He subdues Electro. Kid is a G. So next day, he tells Ganke what happened and then they are confronted by a girl holding a suitcase.

And I’m ending this right here. By the way, this is the first 5 issues of the comic. I intentionally left out details as to where the spider came from and how did Peter end up getting shot and what exactly is the deal with his Uncle Aaron.

So this is Miles Morales.

gay books that aren’t Gay Books, an elaboration

i made a post like this about six months ago but i’ve realised a) that as a wlw, there are literally No books about wlw on there, and b) ive read loads more books that are Fab and deserve a place on there

so to fit on this list, there are only 2 conditions

  1. there must be lgbt+ characters in the book
  2. said characters’ entire plotline must not revolve around them being lgbt+. this can be referenced, but they have to have wider development. eg: trc is acceptable as even though ronan goes through a process of accepting he’s gay, his arc is also involving accepting other (spoilery) things about himself

feel free to add your own as i’ve not read nearly enough fiction about wlw, as long as it’s not just to do with being lgbt as this is a list for people who want to see themselves in fantasy, crime, mystery, adventure, school novels specifically without having All the focus on being lgbt+.

OKAY ONTO THE LIST

  • carry on by rainbow rowell. this is the first book i ever really read where the sexuality of the characters wasn’t the most important thing about them. it isn’t for everyone (read: blatant harry potter references) but i did and still adore it. mlm relationship, queer & gay. 5 stars.
  • the raven cycle by maggie steifvater. the representation is nowhere near as good as some of the others on this list but it’s this high up because of the writing and the characters. mlm relationship, gay & bi. 5 stars.
  • the foxhole court by nora sakavic. again, not astronomical rep, but the plot and characters make up for it. mlm x2 relationships, one main. 5 stars.
  • six of crows by leigh bardugo. fantastic cast of characters. mlm relationship, gay & bi, and bi female character. 5 stars.
  • a darker shade of magic by ve schwab. beautiful worldbuilding. mlm relationship (both bi i think?) which is also own voices.  5 stars.
  • vicious by ve schwab. fantastic dark plot. ace main character, kind of adheres to the “ace characters are heartless” on which way you look but i think basically everyone’s a little bitch in the book so. 5 stars.
  • they both die at the end by adam silvera. so sad but it’s not Bury Your Gays as such since that’s the entire preface of the book. mlm relationship, gay & bi. own voices!  5 stars.
  • a gentleman’s guide to vice and virtue by mackenzi lee. mlm relationship.   4 stars.
  • radio silence by alice oseman. gave me an existential crisis. wlw and mlm solidarity, bi female mc, gay m and gay f, gay demi m. 4 stars.
  • i want to put more than this by patrick ness on here (4 stars) because he’s a fantastic ov rep and i love him and this is his most non-Gaytm book, but if you do want a book about being gay in the deep south then def read release and im breaking my own rule here but it’s amazing 5 stars.
  • ink and bone by rachel caine has a couple that remind me of holt and kevin from brooklyn nine nine (just much sadder.) worth reading just for the concept. mlm minor relationship. 4 stars.
  • again, i feel like you could squeak the song of achilles by madeline miller on here by the skin of its teeth. dont read this if you dont want sadness. 4 stars.
  • daughter of the burning city by amanda foody is a fantastic spooky book and so original. bi mc and aspec love interest. 3.5 stars.
  • ash by malinda lo. cinderella retelling. i didn’t personally like this one too much but it’s a cute wlw relationship. 3 stars.
  • history is all you left me by adam silvera. i very much didn’t like this one for personal reasons but i know a lot of people love it. mlm rep with a bi character (watch out bc the mc is slightly biphobic.) 2 stars.
  • i haven’t read adaptation by malinda lo yet but my friend loved it. it has a bi mc with a bi love triangle.
  • likewise i haven’t read of fire and stars by audrey coulthurst but my friend LOVED it with a passion. wlw relationship.

PLEASE ADD MORE THAT YOUVE READ

anonymous asked:

I would've liked Riposte more if it weren't for the fact that Marinette now caused THREE AKUMAS IN A ROW. Seriously, if she keeps this up, she may as well become the new Chloe.

Okay I’m going to stop you right there Anon. I understand what you’re trying to get at, but I just don’t agree with it at all. Not with Marinette being the cause for Riposte, or any of the akumas we’ve had thus far. In some way, I can see how you came to that conclusion, but I honestly feel like you and a lot of other fans who have made claims like yours, are too eager to persecute Marinette, too much to the point of actually deeming her the “new Chloe,” when there’s a world of difference between them.

To clarify, these are the reasons why Nadja, Gina, and Kagami became akumatized:

Why Nadja became Prime Queen

Nadja had an agenda that she did not relay to Ladybug or Chat. She was primarily concerned with getting ratings and she continued to push Ladybug to admit that she had a relationship with Chat Noir, even when she repeatedly denied it and appeared very uncomfortable with it.

Ladybug saw through Nadja’s intentions and that she would not stop until she forced her to give her the answer she wanted. And primarily she came to the interview and left it because she was wholly and completely focused on her responsibility as a hero and only wanted to reassure Paris that she and Chat will continue to keep them safe.

And what’s more, was she supposed to give into pressure and lie about having a relationship with Chat Noir???

Why Gina became Befana

She was disconnected from the fact that her granddaughter is not a young child anymore, but a teenager with a life and friends of her own. At the end of the episode, she’s come to accept that Marinette had grown up.

Even when Marinette asked her if it was okay to leave for the party, Gina encourages her TWICE that she should go.

And is it really that wrong for a girl who JUST turned 14 years-old to want to go her own surprise party that her friends worked hard to plan for???

Why Kagami became Riposte

She lost to Adrien. That’s it. That’s why.

Maybe Marinette made the wrong call, but it was literally her very first day in a sport that she barely knows and in spite of that she was still put on the spot to make the final judgement. She admits upfront that she’s not sure, but she thinks that Adrien won, but D’Argencourt accepted her answer without question, only happy that his student won over the “insolent” girl. Even when Adrien tried to clarify Marinette’s answer and it’s very clear that she’s uncertain when she talked to him, D’Argencourt remains firm that her call was final.

source for translations on the scene of Marinette making the call

And in any case that still doesn’t make her responsible for Kagami’s reaction to losing. While it’s understandable why she took it hard (she felt that she let down her family) that’s an issue that’s completely separate from Marinette.

Plus towards the very end, none of the characters really learn who truly won. Adrien might’ve thought that Kagami got the point, but neither of them really know for sure. And ultimately let’s say that Marinette was correct all along, Adrien did win.

We would end up with the same results of Kagami getting akumatized, so would you STILL honestly pin the blame on her then???? And if you do, doesn’t that make Adrien just as responsible if not more than Marinette for akumatizing Kagami with him beating her???

Conclusion: all of the reasons for these characters’ akumatizations were due to their own pre-existing issues that they already had before Marinette came onto the scene.

  • Nadja was under the threat of having her show cancelled.
  • Gina hadn’t been involved for most of Marinette’s life and she was lamenting over it.
  • Kagami has a hard time accepting losing because there’s pressure in her family to always win.

TL;DR Marinette did nothing wrong in any of these episodes.

LANCE’S VLOG

Player boy stereotype? Or something else entirely: A look into gender stereotypes and crushes

So, believe me I hear you: The worry of Lance being a flirt and being the only Latinx main character is real, valid and necessary. That is NOT what this meta is about. This meta will cover another facet of Lance: his experience with flirtation and crushing, not so much the flirting itself. I think this meta will help you see, there was more to the vlog than you might have thought at first!

analysis under the cut!

Keep reading

20 Mistakes To Avoid When Writing Young Adult Fiction/Romance

Originally posted by kallieburgers

YA Fiction is an incredibly popular genre of literature, and most people have picked one up and devoured it in less than a day, but there is a trend in the genre where in certain instances, people forfeit quality for a cheesy dramatic plot. A lot of these stories are just regurgitated cliches with vaguely interesting characters and just enough drama, fluff, and mildly (or extremely) sexual content to keep the reader paying attention. (No shade to the authors, because obviously, any author who writes and publishes a book works hard, no matter the end product.) 

There are a lot of aspects of YA Fiction that repeatedly rear their ugly heads and annoy readers or flat out scream dangerous messages to the young people that indulge in them. I thought I’d put the spotlight on a few in the hopes that it will help clean up the genre’s reputation as new and more awakened authors contribute content to it. 

Below you will read about some common mistakes that YA Fiction/Romance writers make that either ruin the story, promote dangerous messages, or unrealistically portray teenagers.


Making A Good Story

These are some things you should avoid doing when writing YA fiction/romance in order to make a generally enjoyable and enticing story.

Forgetting The Supporting Characters

The supporting characters are an important part of any story, even if the main plot revolves around two people. Supporting characters provide subplots, information to the reader, and more opportunities for your audience to connect and relate to your story. It’s always good to give your supporting characters love and attention when creating and writing them. Sometimes they end up carrying the story.

A mistake that a lot of authors make is that they give the reader a couple defining characteristics, a name, a relationship to the main character, and then just make that character pop into the reader’s view whenever the main plot needs them to. No backstory. No life of their own. Just support to the plot, and that’s a huge waste of potential. You don’t want your readers to put down your book and either forget the supporting characters existed at all, or believe that they were extra pieces of a puzzle.

Using Slang Badly

Writers should not feel the need to include current slang in order to make their story more relatable or popular amongst their targeted demographic. Slang is constantly changing, evolving, and most importantly, dying. Not to say that you should only write in traditional terms or put “thy” and “thee” everywhere, but using standard English and avoiding the trendy but temporary slang words is key. 

If you must use slang, try to use the bare minimum and only in fitting circumstances. If your character is the type to say “OMG her dat boi memes are on fleek” then, by all means, go right ahead, but you probably cringed when you read that. That would have been totally normal 2 years ago, but every bit of that sentence has died over time, and no matter how much you think a slang word will stick, don’t risk it.

Sympathy and Envy Mongering

Two emotions that YA Fiction and Romance always try to invoke in their readers are sympathy and envy. The author either wants the reader to feel bad for one or many of the characters, or they want them to be jealous of the awesome (and usually unrealistic) lives the characters have. Don’t be one of these. It’s tired and boring and not original in the slightest.

Are sympathy and empathy both totally okay emotions?

Yes. 

Are they all you need to write a good story?

Nope. Not at all.

The reader needs and wants to feel more than jealous of and sad for the characters in the story. The best stories are the ones that trigger a complex whirlwind of emotion. Sympathy and envy are the easy way out, and you get out of those emotions what you put into them. 

Unrealistically Portraying Teenagers & Teenage Life

Teenagers look up to and compare themselves and their lives to the characters and lives of the characters in your story. Keeping in mind that your audience is young and impressionable is essential for authors of the genre.

Love At First Sight

Love-at-first-sight does not happen. Infatuation, maybe, but love is more complicated than that. Writing a plot based on “love at first sight” can leave a bad taste in your readers’ mouths from the start, and that is something you should avoid at all costs. On top of that, love-at-first-sight is a very easy-way-out move and if you’re dedicated to your characters and your story, there’s a good to fair chance that you can come up with a more satisfying build up.

Unrealistic Romantic Situations

If you’ve ever opened a YA Romance, chances are you’ve read a scene in which the protagonist and the love interest end up in a stunningly beautiful place and the love interest sweeps the protagonist off their feet prior to riding into the sunset. This, unfortunately, does not happen very often, especially in teenage relationships. The most romance you’re going to get (usually) is the love interest offering to pay for the protagonist’s bag of skittles with the leftover money from their paycheck they earned at McDonald’s.

Just because teenagers don’t really go to great lengths to rent an entire ice-skating rink in the middle of the night so they and their crush can skate to Ellie Goulding music doesn’t mean there can’t be cute and memorable moments. Great doesn’t always equal grand and that’s important to remember. A lot of the time, teenagers appreciate fantasizing about things that are actually possible.

Happy Endings

Not all stories have to end happily, and you’ve definitely been told this before, but nobody ever takes into account how stories about teenagers have so much potential when it comes to endings. Teenagers read books about teenagers and unfortunately, this means that a lot of them will take what you’re writing about and try to change their own lives to match. Be honest in your depiction about what actually happens when you leave high school. 

The majority of the time, high school sweethearts won’t stay together. Long distance won’t work, they’ll find someone else, the spark will die out, their personalities will undergo drastic changes, and their goals and plans for the future will turn out differently than they expected. “And they lived happily ever after” is criticized harshly for a reason, especially in YA and YA Romance. Most stories don’t end happily, but there is more than one story in a person’s life and giving a person their happy ending as they graduate high school is a great injustice, to your character and your readers.

Avoiding The Dark Parts Of Teenage Life

Teenagers, despite what a lot of the media claims, go through some really serious and stressful and damaging things. Teenagers suffer from mental illness and deal with the intense pressure of the education system and hold their heads high in the face of stigma over every little detail about them. They suffer from eating disorders and body dysmorphia and self-harm tendencies, and that doesn’t even bring into account the bullying and family issues and the stress of constantly learning and feeling things for the very first time with little to no guidance or assurance or resources to ask for help. It is hard being a teenager. Do not forget that, and don’t leave the actual teenagers reading your story feeling underrepresented and/or abnormal because they aren’t as stress-free as the characters they look up to.

Exaggerating How Teenagers Interact With Each Other

A lot of teenage interactions are short, awkward, and uneventful. Teenagers aren’t super eloquent and socially apt, but YA Fiction seems to believe they are. It’s quite rare that a teenager will just walk up to someone they like, say “wanna go to dinner on Saturday?” and all will be fine and dandy. It’s quite rare that a teenager will saunter up to someone who talked about them behind their back, say something super clever and damaging to their enemy’s ego, and saunter off like the king/queen of the world. Those interactions look great in our heads, but they usually contain a few stuttered words and “um”s and blushing. Confidence is usually a trait that people develop later in life, so try not to push it if you’re trying to be realistic.

Maturity of Teenagers

Teenagers are underdeveloped human beings with minimal experience in most areas of life. They do not have it all figured out. A lot of YA books revolve around characters that are extremely intelligent, disciplined and ambitious at a level of maturity a 25-year-old be on. This is not accurate. Making characters “awkward” or “childish” does not have anything to do with how mature they seem to readers. There is a distinct difference between an awkward girl with childlike innocence and a girl who makes mistakes, does not have her life figured out, and is not yet comfortable with casual social interaction. The latter things I mentioned are pretty universal when it comes to teenagers. 

Unfitting Aspirations

There are more than two paths in life. It seems that in YA you’re either going to graduate, get married, pop out a couple kids and live the rest of your life in the suburbs, or you’re going to leave home, go to college, travel for 20 years and settle in some random country in Europe writing poetry until the end of your days. There is no in between, which sucks. There are a lot of interesting things you can do in life, not to say that either of the two life paths I mentioned are uninteresting. You could take a gap year and travel the world, go to college, move back home for a couple years then maybe get a job that has you traveling and exploring new things for the rest of your life. You could meet the love of your life in college and have some kids but put them in online school so you could travel with them. You could live your whole life in an awesome cabin in the forest casting spells and adopting wild squirrels. There are so many ways life can be and restricting it to opposite extremes takes the imagination out of the future. 

Not All Teenagers Think Their Relationships Will Last Forever

This one is pretty self explanatory, so long story short, not every relationship a teenager enters into is with the end goal of staying together forever, or even more than a few months. Most teenage relationships are pretty short and not very meaningful, and portraying every single couple in your stories as “we’ve been going strong for 2 years and plan on getting married right after graduation” is inaccurate and will probably cause your readers some disappointment in the future.

Relationships Aren’t A Teenager’s Only Concern

Most teenagers are more concerned about the F they got on a History test than they are about who they’re going to stare at next period. Everyone has more than just their crush to worry about. Some teenagers have to worry about where they’re going to get their next meal or how they’re going to get a ride home from school or even how they can apologize to a friend they’ve hurt. It’s not all about relationships for teenagers, in fact, relationships are a pretty small part of teenage life. If all your character has to think about is the hottie they sit next to in Biology, perhaps you should work a little more on character development.

Unnatural Appearances

Most teenagers are not model-level attractive. All teenagers have break-outs and leave the house late with greasy hair or with their shirt on inside out. No teenager shows up at school every day looking absolutely flawless, as if they’re about to walk down the runway. Please keep that in mind, because portraying teenagers accurately, especially when it comes to physical aspects such as weight, acne, etc. is super important. In YA and YA Romance, you must keep in mind that the teenagers you are trying to appeal to should not feel like a piece of trash because they aren’t as perfect as your characters. Yes, YA Fiction is Fiction, but just because you know that it’s unrealistic doesn’t mean your readers do. Readers of YA Fiction compare themselves to the characters in your books whether you like it or not. It is not hard to realistically portray physical appearances of teenagers. 

Avoiding Dangerous Messages

A common problem found in YA Fiction is the lacing of dangerous messages found in the smaller details. You may miss them the first couple times you read a story, but if you go looking for them, you will find them, and perhaps you will find the source of a lot of mistakes you’ve made. YA has a bad habit of endorsing mindsets that lead to bad decisions. Some of them, however, can be avoided in your own writing.

The Need To Change The “Flawed” One

Nobody in this world is perfect. Expecting the person you supposedly love to be flawless all the time is not realistic. People make mistakes. People are not always happy and bubbly and confident about themselves. People do not always act the same one day as they did the day before. Human beings are flawed and should be portrayed as such, especially in the stage of their life which is the most confusing and scary. Teenagers are underdeveloped human beings, and for some reason, teenager girls in YA Romance expect teenage boys to be charming and loving and never ever make a mistake, which is ridiculous. Creating love interests that appear flawless and can make no mistakes is detrimental to your audience. It raises your readers’ expectations to an unattainable level which causes them disappointment and might cause their future partners unrepairable damage to their self-esteem because they’ll think that in order to find a partner, they cannot be flawed and cannot make mistakes. 

Glorification Of Illegal Activity

It’s not “cool” or “edgy” to pump yourself full of deadly and mind-altering substances you know absolutely nothing about. It doesn’t make you “badass” and it isn’t a personality trait unless that trait is stupid. Whatever your position is on drugs or alcohol or whatever, there is no excuse for putting the idea in the heads of young readers that doing things that are illegal and addictive and that might even get you killed is ok. Not only because most of your readers are younger than 21, but because it will always be dangerous to take drugs, commit crimes, and drink. Your choices are your choices. Don’t impose your habits and excuses on kids who don’t know any better.

Slut Shaming

News flash: it’s 2017, people. Nobody cares who you’re kissing or dating or having sex with. People are finally getting used to the idea that maybe, just maybe, it’s not the end of the world if you do whatever you want, as long as you’re not hurting yourself or anyone else. This recurring theme of “I hate this person because they do what they want with their body” is getting old and annoying. Believe what you will regarding religion and morals and what is right or wrong or whatever you want to believe in, but the second you start turning your story into a commentary on the decisions and beliefs of other people, you’re in the wrong. There are other, more creative reasons to make your characters hate each other than their sexual activity. 

Forgetting The First Times

One of the most exciting parts of being a teenager is that everything you’re experiencing, you’re experiencing for the first time. Everything is confusing and exciting and 10x more painful or memorable or enjoyable, and that’s neglected all the time in YA. I don’t mean the common trope of the first kiss or the losing of virginity. I mean love and infatuation and loss and heartbreak; it’s all happening to them for the first time in their lives, and these events make up their memories that they will carry with them forever. Teenage years are incredibly heavy times for people. It is, after all, the years in which they learn the most and the fastest and where the majority of their brain development takes place. These moments that you’re writing, the first kiss, the first time having sex, the first time your character loses someone they love, they’re all going to determine how your character will develop in the future. Treat them that way. Teach young readers that it’s normal and perfectly okay to be scared and inexperienced and lost. That’s the bitter-sweet part of youth and it’s beautiful.

Bad Boys And Boring Girls

Bad Boys are, in reality, bad news. The real “bad boys” in this world are slimy, manipulative jerks who trick girls (usually more than one at a time) into thinking they have feelings for them, using them for things like sex or money, and then either end up controlling their entire lives, introducing drugs and problems, or breaking their hearts. It’s sad, but it’s reality. Yes, there’s always a cause for this behavior, and sometimes these bad boys grow out of it, but that’s not always the case. Portraying these bad boys as “changeable” is not only dangerous for the female readers but also the men in their future. If you make girls think that they can change whomever they’re with to be the perfect prince charming, they will never be satisfied with someone who is flawed (spoiler alert: everyone is flawed) and they may destroy the self-esteem of whoever they’re with by making them think they need to change to be lovable.

Boring Girls are, sort of, connected to bad boys in this sense. They show up in every story, which makes sense financially because authors who make more relatable main characters sell more books. It’s just demographics. But at the same time, this stretch for a wider audience can end up influencing girls’ expectations of themselves and their love lives. If you make every protagonist completely boring, compliant, and devoid of strong, defining traits, girls will take that as advice. They will learn that all a girl has to do to make people fall in love with them is sit quietly and be pretty, which is horrible, in case you hadn’t noticed. Teach girls to look up to strong characters with rich personalities. Nowadays, that counts as an original idea.

Generalization

Portraying every aspect of teenage life and teenagers themselves as if you opened a book full of cliches, closed your eyes and pointed at something is not ok. High schools and families and personalities are different wherever you go, and making blind generalizations about aspects of teenage life can not only change how your reader interprets their own lives, but how adult readers assume teenage life is when they’re not around. It is important to not reinforce the assumption that there is always a popular clique and mean jocks and awkward nerds and dead-beat stoners because these stereotypes are a way for people to justify their snap-judgements, and not only does that say a lot about you as an author, but that will breed a whole new generation of judgmental, close-minded people.

Glorification Of Unhealthy Relationship Behaviors

I’m gonna say this once: It is not “hot” to have the love interest constantly putting restrictions on their supposed loved one. It’s not okay to borderline stalk someone and use “I love you” as an excuse, even if the person reciprocates your feelings. It is unhealthy to ignore someone when they say “no, no, not now” or “no, stop, not here” when you’re in the middle of initiating sex or even just kissing. It is disgusting when romance, especially YA Romance, which has mostly young, impressionable readers taking in your messages, promotes these behaviors like they’re something to strive for. Like it or not, your writing is going to alter the way they imagine a “perfect” relationship. If you aren’t willing to take that responsibility seriously, you should not be writing YA, and especially not YA Romance.


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what she says: i love freeze your brain

what she means: If you look at Freeze Your Brain at face value, you could easily interperet it as simply about JD’s fixation on 7/11 and his issues oversharing. But it’s really more about a place that feels normal and familiar and safe in a frightening and new situation. It’s easy to overlook this, as a lot of the song is made to be comedic. Take the lines “When mom was alive/we lived halfway normal./Now it’s just me and my dad,/we’re less formal” for example. During the musical, it’s easy to focus more on Veronica freaking out than on JD’s words and their meaning. This is done intentionally, as if to show that JD hides how hurt he is about his mother’s death with other emotions, as many people do. Towards the end, it is shown that JD uses slushies to control a possible self-harm habit and self-destructive thoughts, and that’s when the gravity of the song hits you. Despite sounding light-hearted, Freeze Your Brain is about a teenager trying to hold onto the one place that makes him feel safe and happy no matter where he is. If you consider the possibility that his mother introduced him to 7/11, it’s also about trying to recapture childhood emotions, despite the fact that so many things have changed.

I wonder when they’ll finally realise that what makes Empire such a great film isn’t the special effects, or the fight scenes, or the puppets… it’s the characters. It’s the way that, throughout the entire story, the focus is on the characters, not the effects or the plot or how cool this explosion looks or how dangerous this weapon is.

I’m pretty sure that the reason why Vader is such a scary, scary villain isn’t because he has a lightsaber or can do things with the Force that no one else can, it’s because of how other characters react to him. We see his own men be terrified of him. The entire Rebellion runs from him; they don’t even consider any other option. It’s not a question of bravery or firepower. You can’t fight him. If Vader’s coming, you run. We don’t even really know what’d happen if he caught Luke, but we know that we don’t want him to catch Luke.

What I mean is, you see people get killed in movies all the time. Sometimes really gruesomely. Vader Force-choking Ozzel isn’t nearly as gruesome as a lot of other movie deaths. But watching Piett’s terrified reaction to it, and the way he visibly steels himself every time he interacts with Vader… that’s what makes Vader scary. Piett isn’t shown as a coward, or comically subservient, or stupid. He’s clearly a good, competent officer. Vader is just terrifying.

We know Leia has survived torture by Vader, we see her stay at her post as the base is literally collapsing around her. We’ve seen Han charge at stormtroopers and out into Hoth’s deadly night. But Vader shows up… and they run, terrified and almost panicked, as fast as they can. Because Vader is that scary, that dangerous. What’ll happen if he catches them? We don’t know. But we don’t want to find out.

That’s what creates the tone of the movie, and the stakes, and the emotional payoff. Underlined with the music, supported by the storyline, etc, of course, but I think ultimately any story comes down to characters because that’s how we get invested. And they understood that when they made Empire (thanks, Marcia Lucas and Irvin Kershner).

Which is why Luke, Leia and Han can spend basically the entire movie losing and getting caught, and yet by the end of it we’re still rooting for them, we still think Luke’s the hero and Leia’s the leader and we don’t think any less of Han for being essentially the damsel in distress. Because it’s not that they always win. It’s that they’ll always try.

I realise I’m biased because it’s my favourite film, but there’s a reason why it’s my favourite, and I really think that this is what good storytelling comes down to. And why a lot of stories with amazing effects or cool inventions/weapons/creatures and brilliant plot twists and so on fall flat, because they forgot about the characters.

on-screen chemistry.

Originally posted by dacremontgomery

(dacre montgomery x reader) 

request: What about a dacre fic where he and the reader both work on Stranger Things (reader is an actor as well) and dacre is doing an interview and they ask about the reader and the relationship between their characters (whether it’s friendly, unfriendly, intimate or whatever is up to you) and if there’s any chemistry or feelings off set and dacre accidentally admits to liking the reader.

summary: turns out, dacre gets a little nervous when asked about you in interviews. and when he gets nervous, he word vomits. a lot.

word count: 2,144


“So, Dacre, how would you describe filming season three, compared to season two?”

You glanced up from your spot against the wall, watching as Dacre gave the interviewer a charming grin. You just let out the softest of snorts, earning a glare from the head of PR, Allison Hendrix. You just gave her a small shrug. They were using lav mics, for crying out loud. No lav mic was going to pick up a sound that quiet from across the room.

“Well, I, uh, I’d have to say that it’s been just as fun, if not more fun. I’m much more relaxed this time around, since I’m not the newest person on set.” He chuckled softly, hands flexing against his leg. He did that often, you’d noticed, whenever he’d want to look off camera. The entire cast had been sat down just after filming, everyone having to go through yet another meeting on interview tips and what you weren’t supposed to do. Everybody else had already been coached on such things, but you were the new one. Since you were the only one, and they didn’t want to single you out, they’d made everyone do mock interviews, and then pointed out each others flaws.

It had been a long day.

“Right, of course. Y/N Y/L/N is playing a new character this season, right? Anything you can give us on the character, or how she interacts with Billy?” With that question, Dacre did look off camera, a sly grin on his face as he cocked a brow to Allison.

“What exactly am I allowed to say?” He called back, gaze flickering to you and lingering for a moment. You knew exactly how this would play off on camera. The cheeky Australian wanting to spill the beans on season three. It had been all the rage in the media recently to pretend to leak things about upcoming projects. Dacre wasn’t stupid. It’d be easier to play along with that angle and actually not get in trouble for once on accidentally spoiling things.

“When is this being released?”

“Uh, lemme check,” the interviewer said, grabbing her phone and flicking through whatever apps to find the answer. Dacre looked to the interview for a moment, who was obviously having a little trouble finding the date, and looked back to you. He shot you a crooked grin, the sight making your heart do a little tap dance in your chest. “Two weeks after the season premiere.”

“Say whatever the hell you want that won’t give away anything for season four.”

Dacre gave a quick nod of his head, then winked in your general direction. It was easier for you to roll your eyes than read anything into it. The two of you had been flirting back and forth the entire time you’d been on set, and it was that that had made the PR department decide that you two would be paired up for interviews, despite the fact that the man had yet to make a single move on you. As far as you were concerned, he was just flirtatious.

“Right, so season three, me and Y/C/N, absolutely hate each other. Like, burning, passionate hate. It’s great. It’s a lot of fun to play around with, and she’s just, she’s incredible to work with. She’s absolutely brilliant.” Dacre wasn’t looking at you while he said those things, but then again, he didn’t have to be for your cheeks to burn red. The interviewer nodded her head slowly, most likely picking up on the almost - dare you say it - reverent  tone that he’d adopted.

“So you’d say that she’s great to work with?”

“Absolutely. I really believe that it’s going to translate so well onto the screen.”

“Well, from the trailer and few scenes that have been released, the chemistry between you two is palpable. How was it working on set?” The interviewer was speaking a little faster now, in a way that made you perk up. Maybe you were just being paranoid, but it seemed as though she was leading him somewhere.

“It’s the most fun that I’ve had in a long time. It’s waking up every day and going to work with your best g- friend.” He stumbled over the word friend, making you frown. In all the days that you’d been doing the interview circuit with him, you couldn’t remember once him stumbling over a word. And even if he had, his cheeks had never reddened like that before.

“I could see that. It’s like living the dream, right?” Dacre gave a nod of his head, hands clenching in his lap. He looked a little nervous now, his smile a little tense as he regarded the interviewer. You glanced over to the woman beside you, who probably should have suggested a short break for him to collect himself. But she seemed to be waiting for something, like she knew precisely where this was going. “Would you say that the chemistry between the two of you is the same off camera?”

“I’d say so, yeah,” he gave in and glanced towards the head of PR, just a brief little distraction, but a big show for his nerves. He looked back to the interviewer in the middle of her next question.

“Why would you say that is?”

He answered so fast it was obvious that his words were quicker than his brain in that moment.

“Probably because I really like her.”

Keep reading

Driving Miss Daisy

Star Wars’s Daisy Ridley and Adam Driver dish on the epic franchise and beyond in V Magazine.

“I had no sense of what I was getting into. No sense of what was really going to happen,” confesses Daisy Ridley of her first-ever role as Rey in 2015’s Star Wars: The Force Awakens. Currently, Ridley is on location in a remote forest a few hours outside of Montreal for Chaos Walking, a 2019 sci-fi release costarring Tom Holland. But it’s this December’s Star Wars: The Last Jedi, the follow-up to The Force Awakens, that is shining a blinding light-saber-tinged spotlight on Ridley. The Force Awakens was the first movie since 1997’s Titanic to sell more than 100 million tickets in the U.S. 

It isn’t typical for a young actress’s breakthrough film to have the biggest domestic opening weekend in history, raking in $238 million, but Ridley isn’t all that typical herself. As the face of the nearly $10 billion franchise, Ridley has ushered in a new era of Star Wars. Following Carrie Fisher’s untimely passing last year, Ridley’s character, a fiercely independent heroine, serves as a particularly strong female voice in a galaxy far, far away. However, a far- flung galaxy isn’t Ridley’s only on-screen locale this season. 

In November, Ridley appears opposite Johnny Depp and an all-star cast in Kenneth Branagh’s Murder on the Orient Express. The suspenseful tale follows 13 passengers, played by the likes of Penélope Cruz, Judi Dench, and Willem Dafoe, stranded on an opulent passenger train with a murderer on the loose. Aside from blockbuster films, Ridley also produced and narrated the documentary The Eagle Huntress, which follows a teenage girl in the mountains of Mongolia as she becomes the first female eagle huntress in the sport’s 2,000-year history. 

Ahead of The Last Jedi’s release, Ridley catches up with her Star Wars costar (and “bestie”), Adam Driver. 


Daisy Ridley Hey Adam, it’s been so long.

Adam Driver Hey Daisy, how are you? When is the last time that I saw you?

DR Well, I don’t know because you don’t come to all the fun things that I go to. [laughs] Last July? It’s been like a year!

AD Oh, yeah, I guess. I’m much taller now.

DR How has your life changed? [laughs]

AD Oh, just in little ways. So, where are you now?

DR I’m in Canada, two hours outside of Montreal in these creepy woods. We feel like we’re going to be killed at any moment in this cabin. We’re shooting a film, Chaos Walking, with Doug Liman, Tom Holland, and Demián Bichir. It’s fucking cool.

AD Did you guys have time to meet each other before? Or did you just kind of jump right in?

DR I had met Tom Holland twice very briefly—for, like, 30 seconds—and I had met Doug Liman once and we spoke a bit, but it was very much feet first, it was super quick.

AD So, is it hard for you to meet people and just kind of go? Or do you prefer it?

DR [laughs] I mean, as we discovered, Adam, we became besties last year, but we had met some years before. It really takes me a while to relax with people. I don’t think I’m very good at meeting people: I feel awfully uncomfortable. So, I find meeting people very stressful. But it gets easier, and I think I’m getting better at being okay with that, you know?

AD Yeah, you always seemed very open, but I feel the same as you. When I meet people, I don’t know how to small talk very well, so it’s always like two back-and-forths of like, “Hey, how are you? How’s the weather?” And then five seconds later, I’m like, “So, what’s your relationship like with your mother?” It always goes really deep really quickly.

DR [laughs] I think you’re really good at it.

AD Oh, thank you. So, this is about Star Wars: If Rey was a color…I’m kidding.

DR No, oh my God. [laughs]

AD What were your initial conversations with J.J. [Abrams] about your character? Did you know the character’s name was Rey?

Keep reading

One of these things doesn’t belong

We’ve seen a lot of Yang’s red eyes this volume, which I am always okay with because I love them, and I noticed something interesting in today’s episode. Including the character short, this was the fifth time we’ve seen Yang’s red eyes animated since the switch in programs, and up until now they’ve been very consistent in color:

Even with the different lightings, her eyes have been a deep red, matching Raven’s. Today however, we got this:

Yes the lighting is a bit different, but even still it’s a huuuuuge difference considering how consistent it’s been. Her eyes almost look more pink here as opposed to the deep crimson they usually are, like her natural lilac is mixing with the red. It’s almost like she’s using her anger to hide how much Blake leaving hurt her.

WHY I WRITE SMUT

I, as well as so many other smut writers on this and all other platforms, have gotten so many asks about why we write smut, and we’ve gotten criticized for it.

This is why I personally write it and I’m not claiming this is true for every other writer. In fact, it might just be me. I want to explain myself, not because I think what I’m doing is wrong, but because I want people to understand. If you don’t, you don’t. If you do, you do. There’s not much I can do about it and I won’t try.

It has to do with sexual abuse, so if that’s a trigger for you, do NOT read this.

I’ve never really addressed this on my blog, but since it’s a new beginning for me in life, I wanted to be completely honest with you guys. I’ve been here for a year and four months, and we’ve been through a lot of things together.

When I was younger, I fell in love with someone who was older than me. I didn’t see anything wrong with that. Long story short, I got talked into doing sexual things I didn’t want to do (my plan was saving myself for marriage). I trusted this person and I didn’t want to lose him and disappoint him, and he knew it. He used that against me and manipulated me using my own feelings. I wasn’t forced to do things, but I was emotionally blackmailed into doing them, which made me resent myself, my body, and sex altogether. I didn’t even masturbate because I just hated everything about sex and I didn’t even want to think about it.

I never talked about sex. I never enjoyed sex with him. In fact, I cried during sex with him a lot of times. I used to say I cried because it hurt, but I cried because my body and mind and heart weren’t in agreement over it. I loved him, but I didn’t want to do the things I was doing, and I ended up hating myself more and more each time I did it. I hated my body and I didn’t even want to look at myself. 

After that relationship, it took me a long time to date someone and I chose a guy who showed no interest in sex with me. And he never asked me to do anything, which was more than okay with me. With time though, I started to feel unloved and unwanted. I felt like sex was all I was good for in my first relationship and now I wasn’t even good for that. This guy wasn’t exactly mature, so he didn’t know what he wanted from life or anything in general, and I don’t blame him. It was me and my problems. We had sex once and I broke up with him afterwards. I hated myself for it, I hated my body, and I told myself I never wanted to have sex again.

I went to uni and that’s when I really started to write and read smut. Because writing about sex made me feel good again. It made me feel like I have the power to write what I want. I could make my character enjoy sex. I could make up a man who will respect her even when she says no. I had the power over the men in the stories. I started to love writing about it, I started to enjoy it, and I loved writing stories about people being together and enjoying their time together because that’s what I never had. This is when I actually started to explore my own body and with time, I didn’t hate the idea of sex as much as I used to.

I still didn’t have sex with anyone, but I was experimenting on my own and the idea of myself having sex wasn’t that repulsive to me anymore. With time, I fell in love with someone and I started having sex with him. At this point, I still didn’t want to admit to myself that my first relationship was basically sexual abuse. I refused to believe that and I refused to think of myself as a victim. I wasn’t a victim, it couldn’t happen to me, he isn’t a rapist, that’s not how it was, we were in a relationship – those were the things I told myself. And even when I was dating a nice guy who respected me, my body didn’t want to fully cooperate. I couldn’t never orgasm with this man because my mind wasn’t in it. I felt dirty again, I felt wrong and dirty, and I never knew why because I wanted to be with him.

After that relationship, I started to take meds and I started to admit some things to myself. I opened up about some things and that’s when I realized why I hate sex in real life, but I can write a million stories about it. In real life, someone took advantage of me and used me for sex, made me feel horrible when I didn’t want it, made me feel like that’s all I’m good for. In my stories, I could write about women who were powerful, who knew what they wanted and who knew how to say no, who knew how to fight back, and who knew how to leave when the time came. I could write about the women I never was able to be like.

And now, once I’ve realized all that about myself and my sex life, I’m with someone I love. He knows about this – he’s the first person in my life I’ve told this to. He understands. And for the first time ever, I actually want sex. I think about it in real life, I want it, sometimes I even feel like I’m the one who wants it more. Because I feel safe and loved and respected. Because I know my no means no to him and he won’t force me into doing anything. Because he asks me before touching me. Because he asks me if I’m okay with everything. Because he stops in the middle of it and takes a couple of minutes just to hug me and kiss me. Because I feel like I have the power now.

And that’s the power that we should all have from the beginning, we as women, we as people. Men go through this too and this goes both ways. Don’t let anyone take that power away from you. You should have the power and it belongs to you. 

If someone tells you they’ll leave you if you don’t sleep with them, LEAVE THEM. 
If someone tells you you’re not good for anything other than sex, LEAVE THEM.
If someone tells you you’re immature because you don’t want to sleep with them, LEAVE THEM.
 If someone tells you you need to put up with the pain for them and that you would if you loved them, LEAVE THEM.
If someone makes you feel like a piece of meat, L E A V E  THEM.

You have the power over your own body, you have the right to say no, you have the right to stop whenever you want, you have the right to wait until marriage or to have sex whenever you feel like you’re ready. YOU. You’re the one with the power over your own body.

Something I’ve talked about with friends before, is that Peridot’s character arc has been about learning empathy and compassion, right? She knew nothing of those things before landing on earth, and has had quite the crash course (heh) in giving a shit about other people. 

Or as Rebecca Sugar put it once, “She’s excited by the infinite potential of everything, and fascinated by her own capacity to care, because those things had been a total blind spot for her.“ 

And like…thinking about her friendship with Lapis, I feel like she accidentally swung too far the other way. She went from “I don’t care about any of you, I just want off this rock before it explodes,” to “Upsetting Amethyst, even by accident, makes me feel so awful that I’m going to record an apology.” She had an episode of her trying to empathize with Garnet. She saw Steven’s empathy save the planet from the Cluster. She had an episode where she had to see things from the perspective of a corrupted gem (in order to poof it, but still). She tried to make Amethyst feel better about the Jasper situation by taking her to the Beta Kindergarten (which backfired, but her heart was in the right place). 

And she sometimes has the zeal of a recent convert–look at her little speeches to both Jasper and Navy. 

Then there’s Lapis. Peridot fumbles the beginning of that one, but she’s trying, yeah? And she just keeps trying. And trying. And trying. And she just doesn’t know when to stop. Lapis’s reactions, on screen, range from polite-but-distant interest to outright hostility. She doesn’t try to kick Peridot out of the barn again, and she half-asses some morps and watches TV with her and uses her water powers to water their field and takes a lot of naps. 

Meanwhile Peridot constantly tries to engage her and check in with her and is always monitoring Lapis’s emotions if she’s around. Because Peridot doesn’t know that there’s a happy medium between “I don’t care about you” and “your needs are more important than mine.” 

Eventually Peridot got into the habit of changing her words and actions to appease Lapis’s moods. It’s worth remembering that Lapis can be genuinely terrifying when angry, and she’s incredibly powerful. I’ve been around people with mercurial moods who are frightening when they’re angry, and you end up hypervigilant and walking on eggshells all the time. It sucks!! And Peridot has no idea that that’s not what caring for someone means–that a good friendship has give and take; that you shouldn’t have to censor yourself around them out of fear; than you don’t have to (literally!) bend over backwards to please or placate them. 

Peridot’s only other experience of caring about someone else, prior to landing on earth, was caring about Yellow Diamond. “I don’t matter! What’s important is that I’m of use to Yellow Diamond!” Poor baby’s only experience of caring about someone else was slavish devotion without question. No wonder she doesn’t think about herself or her own needs.

So I’m hoping the pendulum will swing the other way a little. I want Peridot to find that she can care for someone and they can care for her just as much–that there’s something really amazing in caring about someone who cares equally about you. That kindness and compassion can go both ways.

anonymous asked:

How do you write Connor so well? Could you share some writing tips?

That’s really sweet of you to say. Honestly, it’s just me trying to pick up on every little thing we actually know about Connor and filling in my own interpretations of what they mean. We really don’t know that much about Connor. He’s only in the beginning of the play then throughout you get little snippets of his life from other characters…but it’s not that much to go off of. Even then, it’s how they saw him which can we a warped version of what he actually was. When I’m writing him, I try not to focus on Evan’s Connor because he’s only a projection of Evan’s own self. It’s important to remember that he’s not Connor. He’s Evan. That’s Evan’s mind talking to him using Connor’s face but it’s not Connor himself. He’s not a ghost coming back to talk to this random kid he’s interacted with once or twice. He’s 100% Evan’s mind projecting.

So then you have to focus on what you actually know about him. I’m gonna dissect it because I literally love analyzing characters it’s my favorite thing in the entire world. You didn’t ask for this but I’m doing it anyway yolo (im sorry).

The first time we meet Connor is at the breakfast scene. What do we know about that scene?:

  • Connor doesn’t want to go to school.
    • It is the very first day of his senior year. Not many people skip the very first day of school. It’s supposed to be a fairly easy, chill, exciting day to most people. Getting to know your teachers, seeing friends, catching up with people, not much work etc. I’m going off of my own school experience to analyze this bit: Skipping/Not wanting to go/Having anxiety over going doesn’t mean you’re lazy and don’t like work. It generally means that you feel uncomfortable, anxious, lonely, scared about having to navigate the world of school and your peers. Connor doesn’t have friends. Going to school, sitting in class, doing group projects, eating lunch, doing anything in school alone and without friends is fucking hard. It’s awful.  It’s not a surprise he doesn’t want to go.
  • Connor is high.
    • Judging from typical school days, it’s probably somewhere between 6 - 7 in the morning. That’s early. That’s someone who wakes up and immediate gets high. AND it’s the first day of school. That’s someone who needs something to help them cope just to get through the day. He needs something to help him take the edge off of life because doing it without anything is a daunting thought.
    • Cynthia also says “I don’t want you going to school high Connor. We’ve talked about this.” Which implies that this a fairly regular thing for him.
  • Connor reacts negatively when Zoe speaks but ignores Larry.  
    • Okay so I love this bit because my psychology loving self adores this kind of shit. It’s amazing and beautifully done and asdlhfal;ksd
    • After Cynthia tries to get Larry involved with making sure Connor goes to school. Larry says, “What do you want me to do? He doesn’t listen. Look at him. He’s probably high.” Connor stays quiet. Then Zoe confirms Larry’s statement and says, “He’s definitely high.” And Connor responds with a “Fuck you!”
    • Every time Larry speaks Connor stays quiet. His body language in the scene involves Connor resting his arm on the side of his head and, by doing so, is putting some sort of physical barrier between his facial expressions and his dad sitting next to him.
    • If I recall correctly, I don’t think Connor ever once actually speaks to his dad??? Larry talks at him but Connor never responds. No words are ever spoken from him to Larry. (I think, I could be wrong)
    • SO the point here is that Connor doesn’t say shit when Larry is nagging at him but the second Zoe opens her mouth to do the same he immediately responds with a big “fuck you” and puts his head down on the table.
    • The way I analyze that scene is that the fuck you was really meant for Larry, that he was pissed off at his father, but he took it out on Zoe. He redirected his anger onto his sister because it’s a lot easier to take advantage of a younger sibling then the head of your household.
    • Judging from how Zoe speaks about him later in the play, he probably redirected a lot of his anger onto her and it really messed her up.
    • Him not speaking up to Larry could also mean that Connor is potentially afraid of him?

The second time we see Connor is at school with Jared and Evan:

  • Connor cares what people think about him and he’s bullied. 
    • Jared says, “Hey Connor. Loving the new hair length. Very school shooter chic.” Connor responds by staring at him with this perplexed look of wtf dude seriously. He was just nagged at home, forced to go to school when he’s clearly uncomfortable about doing that, and then he gets there only to be antagonized by Jared who pretty much refers to him as someone who slaughters innocent people.
    • His ‘wtf dude’ look is totally justified in my opinion.  
    • Jared then says that he was just kidding and that it was a joke. To which Connor replies with “Yeah no it was funny. I’m laughing can’t you tell.” His tone starts out light and sarcastic. When Jared doesn’t respond, he steps closer to him and voice raises. “Am I not laughing hard enough for you?” He’s clearly offended by what Jared said.
    • Jared calls him a freak and walks away.
  • He gets bullied by Jared so he turns around and becomes the bully to Evan.
    • Like he did with Zoe, Connor redirects his pain onto people he know won’t fight back or who he views as weaker than him.
    • Evan nervous laughs when he’s left alone with Connor. Connor can probably see that Evan is scared of him and uses that to his advantage. He says the whole, “What the fuck are you laughing at? Stop fucking laughing at me?”” Stop laughing at me. Not laughing at what Jared said. But specifically laughing at Connor himself. Connor doesn’t want people laughing at him because he cares what they think about him. “You think I’m the freak? I’m not the freak. You’re the fucking freak.” He yells at Evan and pushes him to the ground.
    • People have all obviously analyzed all these scenes before. I’m not close to the first one to say it, but obviously, these are words he wishes he could say to Jared and Evan is the surrogate for his rage.

And finally we have the very last scene that Connor is in which is the computer lab scene:

  • Connor is apologetic after he loses his temper.
    • He sees Evan, who has clearly been crying. I think it’s unknown how long Connor was actually in the room with him/if he overheard the phone call with Evan’s mom. I’m assuming that Evan wasn’t actually speaking out loud when he was writing his letter, that it was more for the audience to know what he was writing. So if Connor had been in the room and listening, he could have heard Evan’s side of the phone call and seen him quietly crying on his laptop while writing something then print it out. Since he was near the printer, he took the paper to give to him. He didn’t have to do that. He wanted to.
    • I think he wanted an excuse to talk to Evan again after he pushed him. He probably felt bad. I feel like he views Evan as someone who’s harmless and unintimidating, which is why it was easy for him to channel his anger onto, but then he started to regret that choice, so he tried to reach out.
    • He never actually apologizes with words and instead tries to do it through actions. I bet you that Larry does the exact same thing too but Connor probably never realized or picked up on it. (I could do a full character study on Larry too omg he’s a great specimen to take apart and a fantastically flawed character like everyone else in the show its beautiful fuck)
  • He’s got a dark sense of humor.
    • When finding out Evan broke his arm from falling out of a tree, he replies with a “That’s the saddest fucking thing I ever heard.” But he doesn’t say it in a mean way. He smiles and laughs under his breath.
    • HE WAS TELLING A JOKE. He was trying his best to be nice to Evan and lightly joke around with him but I doubt they have similar styles of humor. I think it’s the only time Connor actually genuinely smiles too??
    • And Evan doesn’t really laugh. It’s more of a nervous “plz don’t hurt me again ur a lil scary” kinda laugh. So Connor backs off and changes the subject.
  • He’s observant.
    • He notices that no one signed Evan’s cast. 
    • He noticed that Evan has no friends hence the “now we can both pretend we have friends” line. 
    • He noticed Evan’s sad and alone so he’s making an effort to be nice to him. 
    • He noticed that he printed a piece of paper and that it would be a good ice breaker. 
    • He’s quiet and he notices things. It’s subtle but it’s there. I bet you Connor secretly knows everything about everyone. 
  • The boy just wants a damn friend. 
    • He’s lonely. Evan’s clearly lonely. Why not try to befriend him?
    • He’s signs his cast super big so it takes up the whole arm. For one, it gets a laugh out of the audience. But two, he kinda knows that no one else will sign it so he makes his name extra big so everyone will see and know that both of them aren’t alone/friendless.
    • This is also interesting to me because I wonder if Connor knew he was going to kill himself then. Often times suicide is something people plan out ahead of time. I wonder if he knew what he was going to do and I wonder if writing that on Evan’s arm was a secret way for him to leave something semi permanent behind. A way to be sure that someone would remember him when he’s gone. If that’s the case then that was some powerful shit to slip in and it hurts my soul.
  • He’s angry and paranoid and suicidal.
    • So obviously Connor reads Evan note to himself, thinks it’s about him, freaks out and leaves. That’s the last time we see Connor.
    • I’ve looked at this scene in a few different ways. The first way I see it is that Connor could of had symptoms of paranoia. He sees his sister’s name and his first thought is that Evan did this in a malicious manor. He views people as out to get him. It doesn’t take much to set him off. He’s got a lot of anger inside of him that he doesn’t know how to release in a healthy way so it ends up with him blowing up over the slightest little bumps in the road.
    • The second way I view it is a little different. If I’m thinking about my point before (about him already having plans to kill himself) then I wonder if he was just using the paper as an excuse to get angry and leave. He had already made his mark using Evan’s cast. His name was there. He technically didn’t need Evan anymore. Thus he “freaks out” over this paper and it helps fuel his desires to end his own life. As someone who has been suicidal in the past, I understand wanting to find every excuse you can to help end things, to justify what you’re doing, and to push people away. It’s a super fucked up way of thinking but, when you put yourself into that mindset, I don’t think it’s that crazy of an idea.
    • “Is this about my sister? You wrote this because you knew I’d find it.” (Hinting at the paranoia point) “Yeah you, uh, saw that I was the only other person in the computer lab.” (Mentally trying to convince himself to believe that Evan did this on purpose, even though it goes against everything he already knows about Evan) “So I could read some creepy shit you wrote about my sister and freak out, right?” (here comes the anger) “Then you could tell everybody that I’m crazy! Right?! Fuck you!” (cue the storm off)
    • And then we hear from Evan that Connor hasn’t been in school for three days.
    • And eventually we find out why.

From everything that Connor, himself, has told us he’s deeply hurting. He’s quiet. Observant. He’s got many unchecked mental health issues. He doesn’t feel heard. He’s lonely. He uses coping methods to get by. He has little to no self worth. He carries around a lot of guilt. He acts out on people he know won’t fight him back. Probably because he needs to feel superior because everywhere else in his life he feels stepped on. He is both a bully and bullied. He had little regard for strong authority aka Larry. He craves personal connections but doesn’t know how to obtain them or keep them. He’s broken. So that’s how I try my best to write him.

THEN we have what everyone else tells us about Connor. This should all be taken with a grain of salt because everyone views people differently but their words shouldn’t be totally disregarded either. (Yes I’m going to go on longer even though you never asked for this I’M SORRY I CAN’T STOP NOW) So let’s see what little Connor character traits we can find out from other people that could be potentially used for writing him in the future.

The scene during For Forever tells a lot of about Connor through his family:

  • Zoe: Connor wasn’t very nice so that makes sense.
  • Cynthia: Connor was…a complicated person.
  • Zoe: No. Connor was a bad person. There’s a difference.
    • In response to finding out Connor pushed Evan. Zoe is shown to have no sympathy for her brother’s actions while Cynthia continues to make excuses for him. I see that as Connor having no mercy on his sister but probably playing his mom to his advantage with what he knew he could get away with.  
  • Cynthia: Did Connor tell you about the Harris’? We used to go skiing together, our families.
  • Zoe: Connor hated skiing.
    • Not a sports, activity kinda guy. Doesn’t like things involving social gatherings. Not friendly.
  • Larry: Somebody had to be the bad guy.
    • In response to reading Connor’s emails. This one is a little iffy in regards to Connor’s character. It’s more a Larry thing. Because I don’t know if Connor was actually aware that his emails were read or not but either way it shows that he was completely not trusted by his family. Also that pointing out again that Cynthia was probably a push over when it came to Connor and he knew that.
  • Cynthia: We used to go to the orchard all the time. We;d do picnics there. Remember that Zoe?
  • Zoe: Yeah I do.
  • Cynthia: You and Connor had that little toy plane that you would fly. [to Larry, with sad laughter] Until you flew it into the creek.
  • Larry: No that was an emergency landing.
    • This is big. Things weren’t always hell in the Murphy house. There were good memories. Sadly though good memories are often overshadowed by the bad ones. Connor seemed to cast a huge shadow over this family. But it is important to note that Connor and Zoe used to play together as children. Things. Aren’t. Always. Awful. Connor wasn’t a reckless beast. He can be written to be playful and funny and sarcastic and sweet. Just balance it out with the angst. People are complicated and have tons of depth so try to write them that way if you can.

Other things said at random points throughout the play…

Jared:

  • “Connor Murphy is batshit out of his mind. Remember when he threw a printer at Mrs. G in second grade because he didn’t get to be the line leader that day? 
    • Connor has had anger issues since he was a child too.

Alana: 

  • “Still can’t believe the terrible news about @ connormurphy. I wouldn’t say that we were friends exactly. More like acquaintances. We were in chemistry together. I’m pretty sure. Also he was in my English class in 10th grade. Almost positive. Yeah he was definitely in my English class. Three days ago Connor Murphy was here and now hes gone. If Connor meant something to you please retweet or private message me if you just wanna talk. At time like thees we could all use a friend.”
    • Honestly, this says way more about Alana’s character but it still mentions Connor so I’m adding it.
    • But what I do get from this was the Connor has/had a twitter (or some form of social media, but I’m assuming twitter since the “retweet” bit) and Alana followed him on it?
  • “He was one of my closest acquaintances. He was my lab partner in Chemistry and we presented on Huck Fin together in 10th grade. He was so funny. Instead of calling it, well, Huck Fin…[fades off]. Nobody else in our class thought of that.”
    • Again, speaks more to Alana’s character than Connors. But I also wonder if this is actually true or if she made this up in a similar fashion to Evan in order to put herself in the story…since she didn’t even recall if he was in those classes or not earlier.
    • BUT assuming that this was true, Connor doesn’t seem to care much for school. Or he could have been trying to make jokes in order to gain friends. If he worked with Alana on projects, her personality would have steam rolled over his. I think she would be the type of person he would sit back and let take control and tell him what to do then just go along with it.

Zoe: 

  • “Just because Connor isn’t here, trying to punch through my door, screaming that he’s going to kill me for no reason, that doesn’t mean that all of a sudden we’re the fucking Brady Bunch.” 
    • I mean…yikes.
  • “After all you put me through. Don’t say it wasn’t true. That you were not the monster that I knew”
    •  This shit just breaks my damn heart. You are not the monster that I knew is one of my favorite lines in the entire play. In Zoe’s story, Connor is the villain. He hurt her. He abused her. And no one did anything about it to protect her or stop him. I haven’t really had a chance to write too much of Zoe into my writings yet but I know that if/when I do, Connor is not going to be a kind character to her.

Larry: 

  • “We didn’t think Connor had any friends.” 
    • All they found with Connor was Evan’s letter. I wonder how many times he reread it, if at all, before he died. Do you think he calmed down and looked at it again through a different light? This time maybe seeing how depressed and unhappy Evan was too? I wonder if he found comfort in that at all and that’s why it was still in his pocket. Of course that’s purely speculation on my part. He could have just shoved it in there and forgot it was there. That’s the beautiful thing about this play, there’s a lot that the viewer can piece together and take away on their own. Things are never fed to you. They present them simply and let you take what you need from it.
    • Anyway, yeah, Connor had no friends. That point was already kinda clear though.
  • “I gave you the world. You threw it away.” 
    • Connor grew up in a well off family. They were rich. He literally could of had anything he wanted but he didn’t. I take that as Connor not giving a shit about material items. He probably has little regard for things. You could write that as him throwing and breaking near by items if he’s mad or simply tossing things around and not caring abobut them. Whereas someone who grew up poor, would be more likely to take care of their things because they know they can’t just get more.
  • “I didn’t realize Connor meant this much to people.” 
    • In his father’s eyes, Connor didn’t mean very much. He was probably able to pick up on that and it would affect his attitude and behavior to other people. If he felt he didn’t mean much to his own father, then why would he ever be special to anyone else?
  • “He left it in the bag with the tags still on.”
    • Larry’s weak attempt at reaching out to his son with a baseball glove. It was probably obvious to everyone that Connor was not a sports person. He probably hated baseball. But Larry likes it so he tried to force his hobbies onto Connor. It was received by Connor not even opening the gift. From Connor’s perspective, he could have taken that as a ‘wow my father knows literally nothing about me wtf’ where as Larry would have viewed that differently but this is not about Larry asd;kfja
  • “Your dad must feel pretty lucky to have a son like you.” 
    • Another great line in this play! It hurts my soul. Connor is a disappointment to his father. Larry wished Connor could have been something more than he was. Once again, this shit would weigh on Connor’s mind and fuck him up.

Cynthia: 

  • “I don’t remember the last time I heard him laugh.” 
    • That shit is dark yo. Connor doesn’t laugh around his family. He’s unhappy there.
  • “Connor didn’t get invited to any bar mitzvahs” [paraphrasing that quote]
    • Cynthia always had hope for Connor. I like to imagine Connor not being as nasty to his mother than everyone in the family. She really loved him and I hope he could feel that deep down.

And, of course, Evan: 

  • “Over the summer I found this yearbook thing that our class made in 8th grade. Most people did collages of their friends. But Connor’s was a list of his ten favorite books.”
    • One of my favorite bits I like to write into stories is that Connor liked to read. For a middle school kid to have ten favorite books, and care enough about them to put them into a yearbook, is kinda of special. Books are methods of escapism to many people and I like to think Connor is included in that group. 

OKAY IM GOING TO STOP THIS IS SO LONG I AM SO SORRY THIS WAS NOT THE RESPONSE YOU WERE LOOKING FOR I WROTE YOU A DUMB CHARACTER STUDY INSTEAD. THIS IS ALL HOW I SEE CONNOR SO IT’S HOW I TRY TO WRITE HIM YOU COULD SEE HIM SUPER DIFFERENTLY AND WRITE HIM DIFFERENTLY THATS WHAT IS SO GREAT ABOUT WRITING

Critical Role Fireside Chat Summary

Brian is in a silk robe. Possibly only a silk robe. It’s very luxurious, and they have a stream of a genuine fire going too. Only Matt is also in a robe; everyone else is in normal clothes, the schlubs. A few quick pre-show announcements:

  • CR VM Origins #4 will be released January 24. Get it at digital.darkhorse.com, the Apple store, Comixology, Kindle, Nook, or Google Play.
  • The VM d20 set is still out of stock, but they’ll notify everyone via social media once the dice are back in stock.
  • The last batch of CR audio podcasts (100-115) are going up Monday, January 8th.
  • Signal Boost is currently on hiatus (very funny aside as Sam asks Marisha if it’s okay if he goes on another G&S show before Signal Boost), but they’ll be on other shows in the meantime.
  • The CR podcast won a top ten podcasts award from Podbean.
  • New campaign starts next Thursday, January 11!

Today is a continuation of the wrap-up. Brian starts by asking how the new character creation is going.

  • Everyone: culture shock! And the feeling they no longer know how to play D&D. Each person did a private, unrecorded session 0 with Matt to feel out the character. Only Marisha & Laura have gone so far. Laura found that she constantly wanted to say “darling” as she spoke and had to consciously stop herself.
  • Liam, Marisha, and Laura rolled well during creation. Travis rolled three single-digit categories, but Ashley rolled even lower. Oh no.
  • Liam asks Matt about what would have happened if Vax hadn’t stopped Raishan at the end of the Thordak fight. Matt mentions the torturous Speak with Dead spell, which she would have completed, and says she would have then just left them alone and disappeared. “If you hadn’t stopped her then, she would have gone off on her own and tried to be untraceable, and probably would have ended up a villain in the new campaign.” In a twenty-year jump, she would have had time to establish herself on the new continent and would have left Tal’dorei to VM (in peace).
  • Everyone starts joking about Taliesin running for mayor of Tucson. It’s hilarious and I don’t understand the reference.
  • Travis loved giving three vials of blood to the Vasselheim trader instead of the two he asked for. It was one of the first times he realized he could have a lot of fun with Grog being stupid.
  • Simon the belt came from Pathfinder and was a random trader find (at least, as far as Liam and Matt remember). It was very early in the campaign. Matt likes small, insignificant items that become part of the character’s development. Liam remembers cheering up a kid on the way to the forge. Liam: “He was my pet, and he was less problematic than Vex’s pet.”
  • Marisha felt Pike’s encouragement to not wait to love someone was significant in her choice to go for the relationship with Vax. “I’m pretty sure she said, ‘you know, just have fun!’“ It also helped when Vex stopped making “horking noises.”
  • Sam is asked about his plan for the triceratops mansion attack. Sam: “Plan? Plan?” He didn’t realize until the middle that he had no fire, which was critical to the plan of setting the mansion on fire. He thinks it was amazing and notes that none of it was planned. It’s one of his favorite moments of the whole campaign. Liam remembers some great art of of Scanbo holding Bigby’s Hand like a gigantic AK-47.
  • Percy was pretty aware of Vex’s concern over his involvement with Orthax, but Tal repeats that he had no understanding of how the gun or curse worked as it was going on. He didn’t know where his character was during this time.
  • Vex thought the RQ was going to force them to fight Orcus immediately after she made the promise to slay him in exchange for Vax’s life, and is glad she didn’t, since they had to fight Vecna so quickly. Matt says the RQ felt this was a somewhat impossible promise and didn’t take it seriously, but also felt she had taken enough from “the family” in taking Vax. Laura also notes she didn’t have any idea who Orcus was either in or out of game, and after Matt gave her notes on him outside of game, realized how seriously out of their league Orcus was.

Keep reading

Why is no one talking about this?

(Note: this is a long-winded rant(?) about a genuinely minuscule thing that really is just an excuse to nerd out, so if you’re into that, too, keep reading! Otherwise, you might not be that impressed. )

Yup, still on the My Hero Academia bender. Followers may have picked up my obsession over this purple-haired character named Shinsou in particular, but let me tell you that this character has less than some 20 pages in the manga and less than 20 minutes of screen time in the anime and is already more nuanced, complex, and emotionally compelling in that time than most of the characters in the protagonist’s immediate circle.

There are character analyses out there that do a great job of explaining all those points (this is one of the best I’ve seen and you should probably read that first and come back: http://manipulatorshinsou.tumblr.com/post/166609989279/the-appeal-of-shinsou-hitoshi-analyses), but I want to point out a tiny detail that I feel like almost no one has explicitly brought up that says something so enormous about his character arc that, though redundant at this point, is such a small but lovingly crafted detail that it really encapsulates one of my favorite things about this series - subtle emotional storytelling.


Now, there’s mild spoilers for all this, but you REALLY should go watch/read this series at some point anyway. However, I wanted to point something out that’s unique to the anime adaptation. Though some details often get left out in the adaptation process or are edited to fit film storyboarding rather than comics, film has a distinct advantage over manga in two areas - color and space.

Now, the entire point of Shinsou and Midoriya’s duel in the Tournament Arc was to draw multiple direct parallels to each character and highlight the major and really only significant difference between them - luck. In the end, both must fight an uphill battle above and beyond what would be expected of them to achieve their dream; but unlike Midoriya, Shinsou loses and his dreams are dashed. He’s no longer just disillusioned with the popularity games of hero society - he becomes discouraged and disheartened completely from having every last effort and every last plan easily pushed aside from someone more fortunate than him despite his efforts to appear confident and intimidating and to put his rivals off-balance.

Originally posted by fadingsoulss

Midoriya knows exactly the kind of struggle Shinsou has been through, and half the battle was to keep himself from trying to comfort Shinsou, not just because of All Might’s secret, but because they were rivals fighting for their own individual dreams, and attempting to help him would have resulted in Midoriya losing the match and the tournament. He also knew that after the fact there was nothing he could have said to Shinsou that would have given him comfort. Despite every amazing effort, he would once again be put down - the loser who just has to deal with the cruel reality of life.

Okay, nerd analysis time!

MHA is amazing at being emotionally compelling. They hit just the right line of performance, framing, and music to make you feel exactly what it wants you to. The example in particular I want to bring up is this scene (that legit put my husband -who is very much a “manly man”- in tears when he watched it).

Originally posted by cloud-and-tifa

At this point, Midoriya is told by the person he looks up to and admires more than literally anyone else in the world that regardless of his past inability to even come close to reaching his goals he still had the power to become a hero because of something beside and far beyond just having a powerful quirk.

And Midoriya is broken and in tears.

The cherry blossoms are a detail unique to the anime regarding this scene (Chapter 1) and really serve to add to the drama of it - particularly because of the saturation of color and the cultural significance of the Japanese sakura: the beauty and fleeting nature of youth, the coming of spring, and renewal. The Japanese consider the falling of the cherry blossoms to be a reminder that “it’s time to pay attention to what’s happening right now!”

Midoriya has finally experienced his own blossoming as a hero. Based on the scene in this episode and the direction the petals are falling insinuate that this feeling is all around him. His hero is standing over him and telling him that he can become just as great as he is. Everything at that moment has come together to recognize his dream.

Fast forward to Shinsou’s flashback at the tournament:

Originally posted by lawlu

Absolutely the cherry blossoms are there, and it’s even clear in the manga that there are cherry blossoms outside the class window. However, what happens in this scene is that Shinsou recollects a point in his life that he considers to be the epitome of his struggle.

“Whoa, Shinsou! That’s a really cool quirk! Just don’t use it on us and make us your slaves, okay?”

“Heh, everybody says that…” 

And the scene goes grey. This should have been his chance to break out and come closer to his dream, but that wasn’t the case. No color, no focus- just a blurred, painful memory to encapsulate the seemingly inescapable feeling of defeat as he lays on the ground, out of bounds, so close but yet so far once again…

And then-

~~~~~~

“You’re amazing, Shinsou!”

“You’re the shining star of General Studies!”

“His quirk is so powerful and can be so useful in capturing villains!”

“What a waste that he’s stuck in General Studies!”

“I wish I had a quirk like that!”

Originally posted by allenzwalker

No “what a scary quirk” or “I hope he doesn’t use it for his own purposes”! Just:

“Look at what an amazing hero he could be!”

Originally posted by sajoou

Did you see it?

There isn’t a cherry tree for miles around this arena. Everything for so long has been against him from the start. The fire inside him has all but been snuffed out yet again. This should be like every other disappointment he’s had to endure, and yet somehow it isn’t - against every odd.

He may have lost. He may have fallen short, but his real goal has been realized. He’s been seen. It’s time to pay attention to what’s happening right now.  Shinsou has blossomed.

It’s not as flashy or spectacular as Midoriya’s, but it’s just as significant. In fact, it’s exactly the same, regardless of how big it shows on the outside - Midoriya and Shinsou are the same, and they’ve both made it.

Again, this detail of the single petal falling isn’t in the manga (Chapter 34), but it was even more emotionally impactful to me than Midoriya’s awakening because I immediately saw the parallel. I feel that many did, too; but the choice to have the one fall into frame hit me where it counted. It almost wasn’t there, but it was!

I’m done rambling at this point, but really if you haven’t at least checked out this series yet, I highly encourage you to - even if you don’t like normally like anime! Most of the elements that tend to put me off of a lot of popular series are minimal or non-existent, and though it still uses major tropes in the shonen genre it has a tendency to go above and beyond philosophically, intellectually, and emotionally than it has to. It’s not a good anime. It’s a well-written and impactful story!

MY LA SECRET SESSION EXPERIENCE!

Background:

So Taylor’s been following me for over 2 years now and she’s showed up for me somewhat regularly ever since she followed me which I’m incredibly grateful for (like INCREDIBLY). When she did secret sessions last era, I didn’t even have a fan account for anything and I got all the news off insta and my best friends in real life @thislove-brittany and @thosegeorgiastars13 when we would come into school and talk about how some extremely lucky fans got to go into her home and hang with her for hours on end. At that point we all almost had to laugh because we live in Australia and we weren’t known AT ALL by Taylor and we just told ourselves it was such a far fetched dream it was ridiculous… Fast forward a few months later that next year in 2015, when Taylor followed me – I believe to this day she saw a photo of B, G and I posing as Bad Blood characters, and she followed me from that. So basically the first memory I have of Taylor acknowledging my existence was shared with my 2 best friends, but let me now continue with the story….

 On the 1st of January this year, I wrote this post: 

About 4 weeks ago, things at uni went downhill and I had quite literally hit rock bottom in terms of my stress and my future regarding uni. At the same sort of time Taylor had started joining people’s livestreams but she would do so between the hours of 3-7am Australian time so I just kept waking up to her lurking people and watching their lives while I had zero chances in the first place and it was there and then that I thought to myself ‘I’m never meeting her, I have negative hope that I’ll ever meet Taylor” and basically I spent a few days not logging in very much because I was so upset about everything and just didn’t want to bother. But then I started having so many fun events like friends and family birthday parties over those next few weekends and life felt a bit better. During one of those weeks, Taylor had seen 2 or 3 of my tumblr posts where I complimented people’s selfies and it hit me then that good things were still coming and that she still probably maybe had her eye on me (but it was still just wishful thinking). Then London SS happened and my best friend from England, Katy aka @ethereal-swiftness ended up meeting T and I’d sent her an ask about keeping the secret and Taylor saw that a day later and once again I really started to feel things again and it was almost as if right then I knew something was coming for me – like I just knew.

Keep reading

I wanna know what love is

El learning the meaning of ‘love’ with Mike, requested by @cricket-hater

_____________

It was one of those quiet afternoons, when Hopper was not yet back from the station, and the cabin was bathed in dim November sunlight. Mike was scribbling in his D&D notebook, biting his pencil, deep in thought, and El was sitting next to him, curled in a ball and deeply engrossed in a soap opera that was on.

Mike knew those by heart by now. Not only El watched those a lot, but so did his mom. He would normally roll his eyes when his mom switched the TV to cheesy love confessions and dramas, but when El watched them, it was different. He liked the way her eyes widened in suprise, or when she leaned towards the TV, her curly hair falling on her face.

'But Rebecca, you can not leave with him!’ the man on she screen begged. 'I love you!’

Mike resisted the urge to groan at the theatrical character of the show. He turned the page and wrote annotation about a monster he wanted to bring out in a particular moment.

He felt El tug at his sleeve and raised his eyes.

'Everything okay?’

'What is 'love’?’ she nodded shyly towards the screen. Mike felt his mouth go dry.

'I… Uh… You don’t know what love is?’

She shook her head and looked down. Sure, she heard that word multiple times on the TV. She knew it had usually something to do with hugs and lips pressed together. But dictionary definition didn’t help her much. For some reason though, she was reluctant to ask Hopper about that. And Mike always had answers. Right?

Mike looked at her, frozen on the spot, almost feeling his brain work rapidly. How does he explain 'love’ to her, of all things? But then again, he always knew how to explain things to her before. Right?

'I uh… I mean there’s nothing wrong in not knowing!’ he assured her, seeing her expression. 'I… Um…’

'I checked in the dictionary once. It said something about 'deep care and devotion’, but… ’

'It’s not really something that a dictionary can’t explain properly. It’s…’

He took a deep breath and put away his notebook. You can do it, Wheeler.

He looked at her again, turning towards her, and resisted the urge to put a stray curl behind her ear.

'Love is an emotion. A feeling. Like happiness, or sadness.’

She nodded.

'Okay. And, uh… There are different kinds of love. There’s love you feel for your friends. You want them to be happy, safe, healthy and all. You sometimes argue with them, but you always try to make up, and you care about them a lot.’ he looked at her, as if to make sure if she’s not lost. She nodded, processing that.

'And then, there’s love for your family. It’s really similar to the love between friends. Love between siblings is sometimes hard, like for me and Nancy, we argue a lot more than I do with the guys, but I care about her a lot, even when I’m mad at her. And the love of parents, it’s… Um… Parents are supposed to love you unconditionally, that means they never want anything in return, they just love you no matter who you are and accept you. Always.’ he remembered his father’s complete lack of genuine concern and care, and resisted the urge to sigh. 'Like Hopper loves you. ’

'He does?’ her eyes widened.

'Yeah, I’m pretty sure he does. He might not tell you that a lot, but he cares about you more than anything. Then, um… There’s that kind of love.’ he gestured towards the TV. 'Although the way it’s shown here is not really accurate. I, uh… I guess it’s called 'romantic love’. It’s mostly very similar to other kinds of love. It’s…. If you love someone you just…’

He took a deep breath and looked at her quietly for a second.

'You never want them to be away. You always want to be near them. You… You find it hard to breathe sometimes, when you look at them, because your chest is full of this… Warm feeling, it’s hard to explain. And when they are hurt, or unhappy, it pains you. You want to take away all the bad stuff in their life. And I want to always be there when you need me, or when you have nightmares again… I mean I know you are way more awesome than I am and I’m no hero, and Hoppers way more capable of protecting you anyway, even though obviously you don’t need it, because it’s you who saved us all…’

He didn’t even notice the switch in his speech. The words he kept inside for all those months full of longing and despair were just flowing out.

She, on the other hand, noticed, but didn’t dare to speak, looking into his eyes, unmoving.

'And I wish I could take away everything that haunts you, and it angers me that I can’t-’

'I love you too. ’ she said softly, her eyes never leaving his.

'And I… What?’

'I love you. ’ she repeated, feeling her lips curve into a small, shy smile.

He looked at her with his dark eyes, frozen on the spot.

'You… You do?’

She lifted her hand, her fingertips brushing his cheekbone.

'Yes. ’ she said simply, and inched closer to him, touching his nose with hers.

'That’s… That’s good. B-because, I love you too. ’ he blurted out, grinning, his face crimson.

'Good. ’ she repeated with a hint of laughter in her voice and she kissed him softly. His larger palms covered her hands that were holding his face.

'El? ’ he said quietly, his lips still close to hers.

'Yes?’

'Remember, when I told you about the dance? Snowball? You… ’ he gulped 'You weren’t there for the one that was last year, but.. there’s another one coming up next month, and I thought… Maybe if we talked to Hopper, we could go… If you want.’ he rested his forehead on hers.

'Is it who you are supposed to go with?’ she asked, remembering what he said that fateful night in school cafeteria, resting her hands on his chest, while he held her wrists gently. 'Someone you love?’

He smiled gently and nodded, rubbing their noses together.

'Yeah.’

'Cool. ’ she whispered.

'Cool. ’ he pressed his lips against her forehead.

@shattered-quill @themikewheelers @maxmayfield @bob-newby-superhero @lucassinclairstan @alabasterswriting @ale-le-me