This was a stop start project over lots of months so it changes styles a lot of times -.-’ I kinda started it because I’d had the whole “Modern Merlin walks past a reincarnated Arthur” thing stuck in my head for ages but then I thought @ptelly ‘s butterfly in “Return of the King” was kinda iconic so I tortured myself some more and threw that in there :)
I sat on the stage, a room about a quarter full of people sitting in front of me, taking pictures and videos. Jared was running a little late for our breakfast panel so I decided to head out and entertain the crowd until he got here. Before it would have freaked me out being on the stage by myself but I found myself enjoying the thrill.
Hands went up around the room to ask me questions that I surely wasn’t prepared to answer. I had my grande black coffee that Y/N had picked me up this morning while she let me sleep in. I was still exhausted from filming in past few weeks before hiatus and she always made my life a little easier when the time came around.
It’s important to me to talk about how long I spend on art because I used to constantly feel like art “took me too long” and the things I did didn’t look like they should have taken the amount of time I spent on them, and while I’m not going to say there’s no way I could learn to get faster, I feel it’s too easy for new artists (and people in general) to get the impression that artists have a special power or “talent” that
lets them create finished pictures almost with a wave of their hand.
I would look at other people’s work and think it looked so easy,
so effortless that it must not have taken them very long, and I would
want to quickly create the same effect and get frustrated when I found myself stuck on it for hours. While there are ways to speed up the process and some artists just seem to have a knack for churning work out quickly, I’ve now come to realize that in many cases and for many people there is a long grind from concept to color to refining that just plain takes a lot of time. It’s pretty normal for a single picture to take me 8-10 hours to complete.
I wish I had known when I was younger that it’s okay to take the amount of time you need. Your art will be worth it.
Okay so @perksofbeingawaifu‘s darkstag aesthetic is so pretty I had to make something for the fic even if I hadn’t finished reading it yet lmao. and I thought a deer with creepy eyes would go perfectly with the whole vibe.
Okay. So I’ve been stiring on this for a while so I finally decided to take a really good look at what’s actually happening.
I’d like to start off by saying that Steve was pretty much a dick the entire film. I mean I get that he didn’t want to sign the accords but the way he went about it was just so completely wrong. Thing is I completely agree with Tony because he had it right because he knew what was going on. I mean, out of the two of them who actually knows the politics of the 21st century and has worked these sorts of things for decades? Tony.
Tony knew, as soon as the Sokovia Accords were made that he had to sign on. It wasn’t about guilt, although that was part of it. It was about the fact that if they didn’t do it now, it would be much worse later and or done to them and he knew that. (He actually says this in the film.) He also knew that the only way to have ammendments was to prove he was willing to cooperate. As with any new law and it’s affected parties.
Tony knew they needed oversight. Everything has some sort of chain of command. Military. Police. Business. Etc. And Tony knew the value of having that chain.
Steve Rogers on the other hand, doesn’t seem to understand the necessity. Need I remind you that he repeatedly went against that chain and was rewarded for it? Sure, he saved a bunch of people when he went to get Bucky, but that’s not the point. He ignored the chain and there could have been dire consequences (as we see in the future after S.H.I.E.L.D fell)
Another thing. He went after Bucky. Only Bucky. Noone else. It was pure chance that he let those guys out first, but they were used as a distraction so he could get to his main goal. Bucky. We see time and time again that Steve gets tunnel vision when it comes to Bucky.
And in Civil War it escalates to the point where he’s injuring and getting innocent people killed for Bucky. Only Bucky. When it comes to Bucky, everyone and everything else is inconsequential and unimportant as long as Bucky is fine.
Steve did not read the Accords. Fact. He left for Peggy’s funeral while he was skimming. Even if he did read it all, there is no possible way (and Tony Stark would bet his fortune on it) that he understood all of it enough to make an informed opinion. Laws use a lot of big words. Big words that would have been invented in the 70 years Cap was gone. So no, Steve didn’t actually know what the Accords were about.
He probably had no idea what the UN was either. Did you see his notebook in CAWS? Pop culture. 7 decades worth of world history? No, Moon landing, that’s it. Politics? Nope. New laws or government organizations (like the UN)? Nada. I think it’s safe to say that Steve wasn’t really caught up if pop culture is the sort of thing he’s catching up on.
Steve had made his mind up already. And he can’t use the Bucky excuse because by then Bucky wasn’t in the picture yet. Steve never gave a thought to the Accords and then Bucky fueled that fire and made him stubborn to a point beyond stupidity.
So, to sum up here. Tony knew that the Accords were going to happen no matter what and was willing to help make ammendments to suit everyone affected by the law. Steve went “Fuck you, I know better that 117 countries” and got a lot of people hurt and or killed.
Here’s another kicker. Tony convinced Steve to sign the Accords. He was literally about to and then Wanda was brought up, which is another thing.
Okay, a) why the fuck is she an Avenger? She was a HYDRA agent. A willing one, might I add. She and her brother volunteered to be experimented on and then work for them. She was the cause of Ultron.
She did mess with his head, and arguably, because it probably was, it was worse for him. He was alone. He didn’t know she was there, then suddenly he’s shown his worst fears mingled with a shit tonn of major PTSD triggers. He probably didn’t even know Wanda gave him the vision. He has PTSD, he’s probably used to attacks where he sees things.
I mean seriously, Tony has made AI’S before and none of them went bad. (DUM-E, U, JARVIS, then FRIDAY) They (Bruce & Tony) even say in AOU “We’re not even close to an interface yet” which means something jumped the mind stone to hijack the incomplete program.
Then you’ve got to think, an AI is made, with incomplete programming and whatever the mind stone did, and then was instantly thrust into the Internet. No wonder he wanted to kill everything. Information overload much, then attempting to make something of it all.
She had(/has) an illogical and unreasonable hatred for Tony Stark. Sure, the bomb thing was probably traumatizing, but she’s like ~23 now. That’s over a decade since it happened and you’ve got to think, why didn’t the bomb go off?
Stark weapons were brilliant. Top of the line never failing basically. So. Two bombs are dropped, and from the sounds of it, there was no explosion or if there was it was really small. Otherwise how could they be so close to her parents without dying too?
So, this leaves two possibilities. First, was the bomb actually Stark tech? Her home was war torn at the time. I’m sure some sides would like to intimidate their enemies with the idea they have Stark weapons. OR, the bomb was never armed. Again, war torn country. It’s entirely possible the plane carrying it was shot down.
So, unreasonable and illogical. If someone stabs you, who do you blame? The knife, the manufacturer/designer of the knife, or the person who stabbed you? The third one, obviously. So why was Tony Stark to blame? We’ve also got to remember Obadiah was dealing under the table.
b) She is NOT a kid, and I don’t understand why pretty much everyone thinks she is. She’s ~23. She can drink. She can vote. She can drive. She’s killed people. She became HYDRA. In what way is she a child? The way I see it she hadn’t been one in a very long time.
c) back to CW. Steve got all pissy because Tony kept Wanda in the compound (the lap of luxury need I remind you) for her own safety and the safety of those around her. It wasn’t a matter of her starting a fight. If she’d gone out and been attacked and defended herself, the situation would be made so much worse for her. Especially if someone got hurt or dead when she did so.
Now we get to the airport. Tony tries to talk. Steve is dismissive and unwilling to listen. Steve refuses to share vital information that would have helped the situation and the threat they had every reason to believe exists.
Steve starts the fight. His team doesn’t hold back like Tony’s does. They destroy a lot of property and nearly killed T'Challa and Spiderman several times. I mean, fuck you Steve, who just drops a huge heavy walkway create thing on someone who is obviously a teen? And then WALK AWAY while they struggle to hold it up. What if you had overestimated Spiderman’s strength? Congrats, you just killed a kid because once again you show no regard for anyone else besides Bucky.
He leaves his team. They probably knew even less about the situation than he did, because he knew fuck all about the Accords so I can’t imagine the bullshit Scott and Clint were told.
Then fucking Natasha. Ffs, she could have easily either disabled/sabotaged the quinjet or delayed them from leaving. But she didn’t. Then she has the nerve to tell Tony to watch his back after she betrayed him.
Also, Rhodey. Oh my god. Everyone gives Tony shit for point blank shooting Sam, but think about it. If Sam had taken the hit and turned into a glider, Rhodey would be fine. It doesn’t completely make sense, but there was a long moment where Tony was watching Rhodey fall to his death. Sam was a quick way to lash out. He also didn’t hit him that hard, just enough to knock him down.
Zoom ahead, Tony gets evidence that prove Bucky is innocent and admits he was wrong. (About what though I’m not sure, because all he wanted to do was give Bucky mental help and a fair trial but whatever. It’s not like Steve told him about the threat or anything. Because that would have been helpful.)
Clint makes a crack at Rhodey’s condition which is such a dick move. Sam then tells Tony the information he should have been given from the beginning by Mr ‘I-Dont-like-my-team-keeping-things-from-me’ Rogers. Tony heads to Siberia as a friend.
Steve gets a little arrogant cause he’s got this attitude of ‘I knew I was right the whole time and I’m glad you’ve finally seen sense’.
Then the video. This pissed me off the most I think.
You’ve just witnessed your parents brutally murdered by the person standing not 10 feet away from you. This reopens unprocessed greif and causes emotional backlash. Then you find out someone you thought of as a friend had known. Known for years. Since CAWS. And never said a thing in an environment where it would have been okay, instead of watching the murder and then being told someone close to you knew the whole time who had done it. (Again because it was Bucky. Bucky is more important than the world, remember?)
And his face. It’s so broken and betrayed. (I’d add a picture of Tumblr would let me) and he attacks, because who wouldn’t?
And then Steve does the worst possible thing he could in that situation. Fight back. When someone is having an emotional breakdown like that, you hold them until they calm down and Steve was well within his power to do so. If he’d tried he probably could have talked Tony down.
Fighting more fighting. Steve starts disabling the suit. To you can no longer fly properly. Then he proceeds to continue to be violent and make it worse and acts like it’s not a justifiable or reasonable reaction for a human to have (especially one with PTSD and a past of horrible things happening when he’s betrayed by someone close to him)
They gang up on him. Then Bucky had him pinned and is trying to rip out the Arc Reactor. Once again, PTSD. Also, need I remind you that he’s only recently had it removed from his chest. That was the only thing keeping him alive for a long time. In the state of mind he was in, he wouldn’t have remembered he no longer needed it to survive, hence blasting off his metal arm.
By this point he seems to have calmed down a bit and isn’t actively going for the kill, he’s just defending himself at this point.
He tells Cap to stay down, because he doesn’t want to fight him, and when he’s momentarily distracted Cap jumps on him and slams him to the ground. Tony barely does anything and then Steve is punching the faceplate. Then he’s smashing it with the sheild.
There’s this moment, you can kinda see it in the 3 secs of gif tumblr would let me use. There’s this moment where Steve is seriously considering decapitation. Tony sees this, is terrified and emotionally unbalanced and covers his face.
Steve slams the sheild into the reactor and leaves it there. Tony goes wide eyed with terror and let’s out a very not good sounding breath. He’s looking at Cap with such fear because he saw what Steve was about to do. Saw him stab him in the back and literally break his heart. (Kept him alive for years, remember?)
There is so much fear and Steve looks at him with no regret for what he just did and twists the sheild out of Tony’s chest and walks away.
When he drops it, his expression is like indulging a child in something stupid.
Then he leaves him there to die basically. Tony can’t fly, the suit is dead. Can’t contact anyone. The suit is dead. Noone knows where he is and T'Challa took Steve and Bucky with him when he left.
Steve Rogers beat Tony to a pulp after he witnessed something truly traumatizing and then left him to die in the middle of nowhere in an old HYDRA base.
They act like it was Tony’s fault for the Raft as well. I mean, they’re powered and dangerous and also criminals. The Raft was a bit much though, I’ll admit. But Tony didn’t put them there. He brought them in because he was following the law like everyone else on the planet should. Because he didn’t think himself above the law the Steve did. (Aka flipping the bird at 117 countries whose people say they’re scared and what someone to oversee the Avengers) and the jacket and collar on Wanda was unethical. I think the collar on its own would have been fine but wearing a straitjacket for too long is really bad for your health.
And then just to put the icing on the cake. The letter. The damn fucking letter. It’s mocking. It’s arrogant. Not once is there an apology or true regret. Other than regretting that they’re now criminals who hurt so many people that is. But mostly just the fact they have to hide when 'they did nothing wrong’. No remorse for anything. Not for Tony, defiantly not. That would be decent. Not for anyone else either.
“I know I hurt you”. That’s not an apology. There was no mention of the destruction he left behind in his quest for saving a single man, who has killed people. A lot of people. By choice or not, it was still his body. His life was not worth the loss of so many innocent lives. There was no acknowledgement of how deeply you hurt Tony. How much you damaged him.
Steve basically says. “I forgive you for being wrong and because I’m such a nice and just person when you see I’m right I’ll be here for you and all will be forgiven. Because we’re still friends/family. Even if you fucked up.”
Argh. Angry ranting at 2am. I’ve probably missed points I wanted to make but my wrists are cramping and I’m tired.
I just… I used to like Steve, but Tony a little more because he always seemed more relatable to me. (And had a more interesting backstory.) And then this movie just made me hate Cap so much. He was such a dick in it and it annoys me that the movie was obviously trying to get you to side with him. Feel free to add anything to this.
Warnings: Language, mentions of domestic violence (on reader)
I adjusted Daniel, making sure he did not fall off my hip as i walked down the streets of my old hometown. Nothing changed since the last time I was here.
I walked towards Polly’s house, trying to keep my head down, in the hopes I could avoid all of the other Shelby’s. When I knocked on the door, I saw the curtains peel back a little, then the door swung open quickly, hitting the wall.
I was pulled into a hug by the woman who I considered a second mother, trying not to flinch when she squeezed me. After a few seconds of silent embracing, she pulled back to look at me. My eyes flew to the ground, not wanting to look into hers as she saw the reason I was here.
“My god…” She whispered, placing her hand on my chin to fully examine my wounds.
♡ — au where yoongi is a rapper and a producer while jungkook is a music student trying to become a singer (40/?)
“THE PLAN” (aka make yoonkook real)
The whole thing was a setup.
Jungkook sensed it the moment they arrived at the studio and the others weren’t there, except for Jin, who had a blush creeping on his cheeks. He was putting some bowls full of food - that smelled amazing - on the table Namjoon usually used to put part of his Ryan collection that normally stays in the producer’s room. However the plushies were nowhere to be found.
“Ah! The others are arriving… in a couple of minutes… Yeah. Hm. ” He had said, looking all nervous. “I’ve gotta run, yeah, I think I forgot to turn the oven off back home, you guys know how I am, right?”
If he was trying to sound sincere, he was doing a poor job. Jungkook knew Jin. His cousin was a little lost and scatter-brained, but never - ever - in the kitchen. It was his sacred place, he would never do such thing as leaving his oven on to leak gas.
“Are you kidding me?” Yoongi sounded annoyed. He probably sensed that something was wrong too.
“Ahhh… I’ll be back in a few, boys! Bye!” He said, already closing the door behind him with his coat halfway up his arms. They then heard a soft click from the door being locked.
Jungkook sighed and looked over at Yoongi, who was taking off his coat and throwing himself on the leather couch.
“They’re up to something”
♡ ♡ ♡
“Well? Do you think they believed it?” Hoseok asked, while practically jumping in the back seat Jimin placed his hands on his hips and tried to settle Hoseok down but failed, as expected.
“Not for a second. Yoongi didn’t buy my excuse, but whatever. The important thing is that they’re together, and alone, with the best cooking in the world. Everything is going as we planned!” Jin said while closing the passenger side door, and leaning to give the driver (his boyfriend) a sweet peck on the lips. “Now we just have to wait until they contact us. I’m pretty sure that Yoongi will be calling to ask what’s going on soon enough.”
Namjoon started the car and left the front of the building where the Cypher Studio was located. Their plan was as simple as it could be. Make Yoongi and Jungkook believe they were all going to meet and celebrate the 3 year anniversary of the studio, pretend that something came up and leave the boys alone. Jin had made some of his best dishes, brought some wine and had the stereo ready to be activated from his phone, set to play some playlist that Taehyung swore on his life that it was romantic. He hoped so.
No one could stand Yoongi and Jungkook dancing around each other anymore, saying that they were friends, when everyone could feel their sexual tension from miles. But it wasn’t just that. They clearly had feelings for the other but they acted like it was nothing. They would spend all night talking, absorbed in their own little world when all of them were around. Their touch would linger way longer than friendly acceptable and they kept staring like they were reading the other’s mind. It was creepy but, at the same time, it was beautiful. Namjoon had known Yoongi for years and he never saw his friend like that, happy, giving so many smiles and taking care of himself. The boy driving the car was praying that everything would work out and his two friends would acknowledge their feelings so they could finally be together.
♡ ♡ ♡
Where are you guys?
Oh, hey Hyung!
Hey?? Where are you, brat?
You guys were supposed to be here
Kookie and I are waiting for 40 minutes
Aren’t you guys coming???!!!
What the fuck, Tae?
What do you mean by “no”??
It means we’re not going!
I knew you were all up to something
What’s going on?
You’re a smart boy
You’ll figure it out
Shut up, Tae
What he meant is
Why don’t you and Jungkook just enjoy the night?
Jin-hyung left some food and wine in the kitchen
You guys can talk
And enjoy the night…
I can’t believe this
Are you guys seriously playing matchmaker with us??
If this is what it takes
To make you guys realize you should be together
Then yes, we’re really playing matchmaker
Good night, Hyung!
♡ ♡ ♡
Groaning, Yoongi threw his phone on the couch and turned to look at Jungkook, who was sitting at the piano, softly touching the keys almost like he was afraid of the sound. He took his time staring at the boy. He was dressed like he always was; skinny jeans, a sweater that is clearly too big for him and the damn timberlands he insisted on using every freaking time. With his hair looking like a planned mess, in the strange yellow light of the studio, casually playing the piano, he looked like a model. Yoongi didn’t know how that was possible, how could the boy look like he was at a fashion shoot all the time. Like he knew that Yoongi was thinking about him, Jungkook turned around and smiled, showing his bunny teeth and closing his eyes.
Yoongi never stood a chance.
He should have known, from the beginning, since the day that Jin-hyung called to invite him to a special welcome dinner for his little cousin that was moving to Seoul to study music. The boy had a captivating personality and boyish smile. He looked like he was really naive and shy, but as soon as he was comfortable, he would become playful and touchy. He was smart and good at nearly everything. But, above all, Jungkook was passionate about music and that really did a number on Yoongi, himself being a music lover since he was little. And then, when he sang for the first time for the older, with a sweet voice that could reach amazing tones, apparently, it reached Yoongi’s heart too.
Maybe it was the long periods of time they spent together, maybe it was the way Jungkook was always up to eat tons of lamb skewers, or maybe it was the way that he seems to really get Yoongi understand him like no one else could. He knew when the older boy needed to chat about random things like new music equipment and anime, or when he just needed the company, just needed to know that Jungkook was there for him. Whatever it was, Yoongi knew he was too far gone, his feelings for the boy with the bunny smile too obvious to pretend they weren’t there.
Smiling back, Yoongi got up from the couch and headed to the piano, sitting with Jungkook.
“This is one of my favourite songs, and I never showed it to anyone… Until now” he heard Jungkook let a little-surprised sound before he started to play the notes he knew too well. “It’s called I Need U”
♡ ♡ ♡
The song was a beautiful mix of delicate and melancholic, while still sounding a little happy.
Jungkook felt mesmerized every time he heard Yoongi playing and he allowed himself to really watch him. The older never looked so angelic as he looked when his fingers were sliding over the piano keys like it was the most natural thing in the world. He looked at his face and he had his eyes closed, looking so peaceful and… passionate. It was overwhelming and it felt like Yoongi was showing his soul. Jungkook felt warm inside. Looking at Yoongi’s face and hearing the song felt like it was too much. This was, probably, the most beautiful scene Jungkook has ever seen. Even if it wasn’t the first time he listened to him playing, he still needed to catch a breath.
It was like every time he was with Yoongi, he had to force himself to breathe. He would constantly catch himself staring at the pianist, getting lost in his moonlight-kissed skin, his lazy eyes and his lips, that looked oh-so-soft, that these days seemed to be a constant theme in his dreams… And before he noticed, his face was almost purple, both from embarrassment and for the lack of oxygen.
When the music came to an end, the notes slowing fading, it was like the melody still remained in the air. Yoongi took a breath, his hands still ghosting over the keys , like he refused to part ways.
Like it was the most natural thing to do, Jungkook slowly took his hand to the piano, his fingers brushing onto Yoongi’s and softly caressed them, like some sort of “thank you” for the song. The boy felt like the warmth he was feeling inside was spreading through his whole body, contrasting with Yoongi’s cold hand.
“Jungkook-ah…” His name sounded like a breath, a whisper.
He waited for the older boy to complete the sentence but he didn’t. Instead, he moved his hand, their fingers intertwining into a loose grip. Jungkook felt Yoongi’s thumb slowly move like he was drawing something on the back of the boy’s hand.
It felt oddly normal to stay like this, even though they had never held hands this way before. Sure, they touched each other’s hands once or twice but it never felt like this. So personal, so meaningful. It felt right.
Jungkook already had some plans in his mind, about how to approach Yoongi and tell him about his feelings, maybe ask him on a date or at least make his intentions a little more clear, but while holding the older boy’s hand, he figured this was as good time as any.
“Hyung, I…” his voice cracked a little, He couldn’t hide how nervous he was feeling, even if he tried. Hearing his name, Yoongi looked at Jungkook, their hands never parting.
While gazing into Yoongi’s eyes, it was hard to get his month to work and say the words he wanted to say for so long, to ask for the things he craved so much, things that made him lose countless hours of sleep. But Jungkook couldn’t and wouldn’t let this chance slip away.
“Hyung, can I kiss you?”
Yoongi blinked a few times but didn’t seem like he was shocked, as Jungkook had imagined he would be. He just kept staring at the boy, like he was seeing into his soul, until he let a hard breath leave his lungs, his voice sounding a little strange. Almost desperate.
“God, Jungkook-ah… Just… Yes. Yes, please.”
And as soon as Yoongi said the words, Jungkook moved closer, their face mere inches from each other. Yoongi’s hot breath brushed against Jungkook’s face and both held each other’s gaze, like repeating the question, just to be sure. They were so close, their noses almost touching , when Jungkook finally gave in and closed the distance between them.
The young boy couldn’t help but let out a little whisper, as soon as he realised that yes, Yoongi’s lips were just as soft as they looked. Maybe more. Jungkook felt that his fingers were no longer intertwined with Yoongi’s, but soon enough he found out why because he felt the pianist grab his sweater and pull their bodies even closer, their lips never parting.
Yoongi pressed his lips against Jungkook’s, softly, before tracing the boy’s bottom lip with his tongue. He let go of the boy’s sweater, just to let his hands move to the back of his neck. Jungkook reacted taking his hands all the way to Yoongi’s hips and holding him in the place like he was afraid of the older boy leaving. Even in the awkward position, they kept kissing and breathing on each other’s lips, their tongues slowly touching every now and then. Jungkook craved for Yoongi’s lips, like he never wanted anything in his life. He tasted like coffee and warmth, and Jungkook felt addicted, a sound of contentment leaving his lips without him noticing.
They broke the kiss reluctantly to catch a proper breath, feeling like they had been kissing for hours, but their bodies remained close. Their lips were still touching when Jungkook murmured on the other’s lips.
“Kiss me again. Please kiss me again”
Yoongi didn’t have to be asked twice, kissing the boy with desperation, all the want and longing he had felt for so long finally being paid, with their lips locked together and their tongues caressing the other. It felt like heaven and Jungkook was feeling dizzy from happiness and want, a shiver running through his body like there were sparks dancing all the way down his spine.