i just had a lot of line of durin feels okay

Care For Him (Care For Series)

Originally posted by swayer-of-dale

Thorin Oakenshield x Healer!reader ft. The Company + Bilbo + Gandalf

Genre: angst (But it gets better in Pt.3)

Sequel to Care for the Company

A/N: Part 3 will be the final part and it may be long ass if you guys like that stuff?

PREVIOUS (Care for the Company)

After that night, I did not pursue Thorin. I knew that I would never be up to his standards and that what would had probably would not last that long. I kept my distance as much as possible, always volunteering to do duties to keep myself busy or doing patrols through the campsites whenever I could. 

Many of the company noticed myself distancing from the group, especially Kili and Fili. But I ignored this and continued on with my instincts since I had already made up a plan. Once Erebor was reclaimed I would return to the Shire with Bilbo who had asked me quite a while back at the beginning of our journey. And I wasn’t about to give up an offer as such.

We continued on our journey, going through the the dark forests that were filled with illusions after we were trapped by a herd of spiders. I was able to escape only just while the others were captured. I sat in the high trees above, watching silently as they were taken in by the elves of Mirkwood.

I followed on, slipping in without being seen due to being so quiet in my footsteps while the elves marched like Gods amongst the halls. I slipped through the majestic hallways before coming to the under grotto, coming to the wine cellars where the elves ran about. I hid behind one of the large craters, watching as they drunk the King’s wine before all dispersing to continue with their work.

I watched carefully as one of them had the keys, placing them lazily on the table and following the others away. I smiled and pulled a sleeping draft, slipping it into the bottles on the table before grabbing the keys.

I slipped back upstairs, gasping when I sighted the sly King Thranduil and his son Legolas coming my way, I hid behind a large pillar, hearing them banter to each other, something about trying to cut off any paths that the dwarfs could use. 

I gasped at this, freezing as I heard the two elves halt at this. In the reflection of the marble floor, I saw a large tall figure hasten closer, making me hold my breath before the King was distracted by his servants who summoned him to meeting.

I sighed at this and remembered the wine cellar, knowing that that was probably the best way out. After they had disappeared, I made my way to the dungeons quietly, the guards having been let off of duty early to have celebrations for a festival that was taking place.

I look around at all the cells, watching all the dwarves, dressed in only their tunics, looking in disdain and hopelessness as Ori whimpered softly, ‘Were never going reach the mountain now …’

At this I smiled, turning to Thorin’s cell and jingling the keys, ‘Not stuck in here are we?’ He looks up from the ground at this in shock, jumping to his feet and grabbing the bars of the cell in shock as Balin cried out my named but I instantly shushed him, and the others who also cheered, ‘Do you all want to be caught again?! Hush up!’

I turned back to Thorin’s cell, unlocking it quickly, sending him a small smile before running off to see to unlocking the other cells.
The rest of it all was a blur. Barreling down Mirkwood’s great ravines as the Elves pursued us, tumbling and fighting all at once as the Orcs ambushed the Elves, taking them out as they fought to follow us in our tracks.

I hung onto Dori’s barrel tightly, screaming out as they attacked us shooting arrows and throwing weapons of sort which some of the dwarfs caught, attacking back. I looked upwards to see that their was a dip of water coming up as well as a rock, knowing that it wouldn’t be possible to avoid it. I pushed off the barrel, sending Nori safely into the other barrels as I was dragged under the current with a scream.

I flailed and lost my footing of the lake floor as I fell into the deeper waters, my eyes widened as I fought towards the surface, gasping as I broke through, struggling to keep afloat.

Kili looked around at the sound of my screaming, his eyes widened as he cried out to me, many also turning as I was dragged back deep into the murky depths. I was struggling now to fight and swim to the surface, my body becoming weak at a quickening pace before my eyes were beginning to become heavy.

Faintly I felt a strong arm wrap around my waist strongly and firmly, dragging me my like a rag doll through the waters before we broke through the surface yet again. I gasped in horror, my eyes widening in shock as I was hit with precious fresh air, cough and spluttering as I felt someone rubbing my back.

I looked up in shock to find Fili, his eyes widened in horror. ’Are you all right?’ He said under his breath as I gasped softly for breath, nodding to him as he let out a great sigh of relief.

He brought me into his chest, holding me close and tightly as he rubbed my back, gently and comfortingly. I couldn’t help my cling to him, hiding my face in the crook of his neck as I whimpered softly, allowing him to hum against my ear, ’Shh, its okay your safe now.’

I heard our names being called loudly, looking up to see the others on the riverbank, all drenched and watching us fearfully at the sight of me almost lifelessly in Fili’s arms. He held me in his arms steadily as he brought us to the shore, my legs feeling nothing but jelly.

He held me up as he helped me up, almost being knocked off of my feet as Thorin placed his hands on my shoulders, his eyes looking me up and down in worry, ‘Are you all right? Are you hurt?’

‘I’m fine Thorin,’ I say, pushing him off instantly, shoving his hands off of me. I was back to normal again, my walls back in protection mode. Fili sighed as I pulled away from him pushed past Thorin roughly, before sitting down on an abandoned boulder.

I sighed softly to myself, breathing steady again as the dwarfs looked between each other as I sat in utter silence. Thorin looked at me, making his way over slowly and opening his mouth to say something when suddenly we sighted a bowman, pointing at Ori who sat as still as a statue, ‘Move, and your dead.’

At this Balin stepped forward instantly at this, raising his hands in the notion of peace as he spoke to the young human, Bard. They negotiated, and we were able to get a ride to Lake Town.

I look out to the open waters, ignoring the soft bickering of the other dwarfs. I had never felt at peace like this moment, it was the best feeling to just feel nothing but pure serenity. But this moment ended when I felt a gentle touch at the arm, making me turn instantly to find Thorin beside me.

I instantly went to move away but he grabs my arm, pulling me back to his side.
‘What do you want Thorin?’ I  mumble softly, trying not to make eye contact with him, struggling to do so as he stared at me like i was the last thing on earth. He turned my head gently, ‘Look at me Y/N.’

I ignored this. ‘Y/N, please …’ At the sound of his cracking voice I readied myself and looked up at the dwarf, and almost broke. His eyes were cracked at the sight of me, tears nearly spilling as I looked into his eyes, ‘Why don’t you look at me? Why don’t you talk to me?’
‘There is nothing to talk about Thorin-’

‘And I guess that night was nothing right?’ He said pinching the bridge of his nose. At this I sighed, looking away but was stopped as he held my chin firmly, a chill running down my spine as he did, ‘Don’t pretend like you didn’t feel anything. When I touched you.’

He ran his fingertips across my cheek lovingly, causing me to gasp as he continued, ‘When I looked at you.’ I couldn’t help but look up as he said this, placing his forehead against mine. ‘Tell me you didn’t feel anything …’

I looked up at him, wanting nothing more than to take him into my arms and hug him, to kiss him, to love him. But I shut my eyes tightly, whispering painfully, ‘No, I did feel. It not just that.’

‘What do you mean-’
‘Its not you Thorin, its not you at all!’ I said as I pulled away, allowing him to only hold my hand gently and firmly, his eyes wide with heartache, ‘It’s not you, its me. I-I-’

I began to stutter as the tears fell down my face slowly, shocking Thorin as he took my hands into his own firmly and comfortingly, ‘Its-Its complicated, its hard to explain …’

‘Please …’ He said, now holding my face in his hands gently, wiping away my tears. I shook my head, ‘I’m sorry I can’t Thorin … I just can’t …’

And I pulled away, padding to the other side of the boat to sit next to Kili and Baldin quietly, wiping my tears slowly as I watched Thorin sigh in defeat, his own tears falling in the shadow of the moonlight.

Kili watched me silently, shaking his head as he whispered, ‘You shouldn’t plague yourself so much with negativity. You and Thorin … you deserve to be happy.’

I sat beside Kili, dabbing his head as his fever began to finally lower as Tauriel, an elf from Mirkwood who had followed us, had performed a healing spell upon him to heal him extraordinarily fast. And someone who was in love with him heavily, just from a simple look it could be told. I had decided to stay behind and look after Kili, much to Thorin’s dislike, but I dismissed him and wanted to help a friend out.

I smiled as he opened his eyes finally, smacking him lightly on the shoulder, ‘You should’ve told us that the wound was so great, we would’ve been able to treat you sooner instead of you wailing like a headless chicken.’

He just smiled lightly, ‘I didn’t want to act weak in front of Thorin Y/N, and yet he just seemed to pick up my weaknesses in a heartbeat.’

‘He didn’t. Thorin was just looking out for you. I know how much this means to both you and Fili, but you should also prioritise your life. That’s why Thorin is so careful with you numheads,’ I said as I wiped the sweat from his forehead gently. He smiled at this, ‘You do care a lot for him don’t you?’

I give a pointed look as he just smiles, shaking my head, ‘Don’t even go there Kili, you know we’ve already spoken about this.’
‘I’m just saying you-’

‘Uh!’ I say instantly, placing a hand over his mouth tightly, ‘Enough, now rest. And there is someone here to see you …’

At this I instantly moved away, giving a gentle smile to Tuariel who also returned it before going to Kili’s side. I walked to the small kitchen area of Bard’s home, watching quietly as Tauriel and Kili whispered words of love and wanting to each other.  

A twinge of jealousy hit me, making turn away as the tears began to fall slowly. A jealousy that was against their love. I thought instantly of Thorin, of how much he was willing to give up for his people, for his company, for his friends, for the ones he loved, and how much he wanted to love me. But if it weren’t for my past and stupidity, I wouldn’t wait another second to be with Thorin.

I wiped away my tears with a sigh, looking up at the mountain, watching as the sun inked the sky in blood and fire, hoping that things would turn out for the better. Maybe I could fix what was between Thorin and I, and make him happy.  
But that was not what we met on the lonely mountain, at Erebor. Thorin was now under the Dragon sickness of the treasure, and when I had first seen him, if it were for Kili I would’ve keeled right over right then and there.

Thorin looked older than any other time that I had seen him. Wrinkles creased beneath his eyes, cheeks and upon his forehead, his lips creased and dry. His calmness and kindness, turned to nothing but hatred and anger. And his eyes, oh his eyes. They were nothing but grey, the oceanic blue that I had fallen for were now gone. All for the Arkenstone, the heart of the mountain.

‘He’s changed, my Uncle. And if he doesn’t change up soon, things will turn ugly,’ I turn at this to Kili who stares up at the stars as we stand on the canopy. I nod at this silently before he goes back inside the mountain.
I leant against a broken pillar, looking out over the land that was drenched in moonlight, open and beautiful, watching as the fires burned and the people of Lake town took refuge in Dale, along with the elves who all  prepared for the coming fight that may occur in the next few days.

I thought of the company, all who had shed their tears in private, Balin having taken a blow pretty heavily at the fact that his King was now just like his Grandfather. I was trying to keep it together, all for the sake of the company and tried to keep spirits high as much as possible, telling them to never give in.

I heard the tumble of rumble and was instantly on my feet, pulling my weapon out only to see Bilbo who had his hands up in the air at this, ‘Its just me.’ I sigh at this, rubbing my face, ‘I apologise, I’m so on edge at the moment.’
‘I know, I guess we all are to an extent …’ I smile at him at this, but notice his usual nervousness has taken over his manner, twiddling his thumbs and bouncing on the balls of his feet as he muttered, ‘The-There is something I-I must tell you Y/N.’
‘Yes what is it?’ I said, looking around cautiously before looked back to see the Arkenstone, that beautiful wretched stone, now in his hands, ‘Where did you-’

‘I’ve had it this whole time, ever since I left the mountain after entering it alone. I took it because I thought that Smaug was wrong about the whole Dragon Sickness. But he was right, and I reckon that this will be the only way to get our freedom,’ I sigh at his words, wanting to reply until I heard heavy footsteps close by. 

I look to Bilbo, who’s stoned, pushing him behind a lone pillar as he stuffed the great stone down his tunic. I turned to find Thorin, wrapped up in his thick furs and his large golden crown placed on his head firmly making me want to cringe in disgust.

‘What are you doing out here on your own?’ He said, his voice cold and low. I gulp at this and give him a small smile, ‘I-I was just out here to get some air Thorin.’

Thorin looked at me curiously, his eyebrows furrowing, ‘Are you hiding something from me? Have you also turned your back on me like the rest of the company?’ My eyes widened at this, anger boiling in me, ‘Your not serious? Are you that selfish that your blinded by your hunger for the Arkenstone?’

‘Don’t push me,’ He growled, his body spiked in instant rage as he grabbed me violently, making me gasp out as he pulled me close to him almost nose to nose, fear trickling down my spine. 

‘Don’t you dare try and tell me how to act! I am your King! Know your rightful place you low life or I’ll throw you off the wall if you don’t learn to follow orders … Do you not like taking orders from your King, scum?’

‘No I don’t like it! I don’t like it one bit!’ I screamed in his face, pushing roughly away from me, feeling almost sick at his very touch. My body was hot with anger now, crying out. ‘But that doesn’t matter to you either does it? As long as the company here to follow orders, you don’t care what we care or how we feel? Or how I FEEL! Where is the Thorin that always checked on us, always wanted what was best for us?’

At this he blinked, widening his eyes and shaking his head, making me confused as he whispered, stepping away from me as he did, ‘I-I am sorry. I apologise for my temper I-I did not mean to frighten you. Forgive me.’ At this he let out a great sob softly, and my heart softened at the sight but I knew I mustn’t fall for it.

But as a distraction, I placed my arms around the King, turning him away from the wall, ‘Its okay Thorin, I understand that you may be under some stress about-your prized possession. Lets go back inside, shall we?’ He nodded at this, gasping as if almost out of breath, ‘Yes-Yes I must check on the progress of the search for the stone-’

I looked over my shoulder discreetly to see Bilbo giving me a sad smile before disappearing behind the wall. This better work Bilbo.

‘No-No its real. I took it as my 14th share of the treasure.’ I cringed at this. The sun had now risen over the land, shining upon the dwarves and elven armour, silence reigning as the words fell from Bilbo’s lips.

The other company members, now all stacked up and lathered in armour at their King’s orders, stood in a shocked silence, all staring between Bilbo and Thorin, who now turned in a deadly manner before whispering, ‘You? You would dare to steal from me?’

‘Steal? No I know I’m a burglar but I like to think I am an honest one,’ Bilbo said with a sad smile on his lips, ‘I was going to give it to you, many times I was going to give it to you-’

‘But what thief? Why didn’t you give it to me?’ Thorin spat out angrily, obviously trying to keep his rage at bay before Bilbo looked up with him with a certain determination, ‘You have changed Thorin.’

Suddenly the King laughed aloud, shocking us with his maniacal laughter that rang out through the steady silence. He smiled around at us before looking down at the hobbit, ‘I’ve changed? I have not changed you liar-’

‘Yes … you have.’ At this I stepped forward, standing beside Bilbo who looked at me in shock, mirroring the dwarves’ expressions, including Thorin, ‘What-’

‘You have changed Thorin Oakenshield,’ I said, staring at him, leaning my body forward as I spat the words out, tired of pretending everything was all right when really it wasn’t, ‘The Dwarf I fell in love with never would’ve backed down on his word! Or even questioned the loyalty of his Kin!’

His eyes lingered with tears as I said this, but that was gone in an instant. He sneered at me at this, shaking his head, ‘You, you have deceived me! You have gone against your King you traitors! But … I will spare you, lass. Throw the Hobbit over the wall’

Bilbo looked up at this in shock as I looked to the rest of the company, watching as they didn’t move at inch at his orders, not even Fili who he dragged along who pulled himself from his Unce’s grasp until he looked to us in absolute rage, his eyes had turn to a dark grey, almost black even, a shiver running down my spine, growling, ’I’ll do it myself.’

In a rush of adrenaline, I drew my sword, raising it in defence, standing before Bilbo, shocking the company as they gasped in horror, but Thorin took no notice. He raised his fist at me but I dodged him, kneeing him in the groin succefully as he groaned, I pushed him to the floor, pointing my sword at him.

I stared dow at him tearfully as I muttered softly, ‘He goes free, or you kill us both.’ At this Bilbo grasped my arm tightly, trying to waver me of my desicion as his voice shook, ‘Don’t do this, its not worth it. Your life is more valuable than mine. We both know who he’ll miss more when he snaps out of the sickness.’

I shake my head at this firmly, only peeking a look at the hobbit who had tears in his eyes, ‘Its both of us or nothing Bilbo. I will not have someone die just because of someone else’ greed, even if its the one I love with all my heart!’

But that split second of distraction changed it all, Thorin had his hand grasped around my throat, instantly winding me, slamming me against the wall that shut the outside world off from Erebor, half of my body hanging from it and in thin air. 

I could hear the faint screaming of Bard and Gandalf, but all I could do is look into Thorin’s eyes, only seeing darkness, darkness that I recognised. 

I slam the heel of my palm into his face, sending it back and hearing him shout out in pain before escaping his firm grasp, grabbing Bilbo firmly as Bofur helped us run towards the chain that Bilbo had left hanging the night before as I heard the King roar, ‘YOU CHEATS! THIEVES!’

‘Come my dear, there is nothing we can do for Thorin now,’ Gandalf said, wrapping a protective arm around my shoulders, Bilbo walking directly beside me as we pushed through the army of the elves and away from Erebor. Tears that I had no recognition of fell down my face as I heard Thorin cry out, ‘I will have war!’

NEXT (Care For Her) or Care for Series

Perfect Two

Overall Summary: You and Thorin have been best friends for years, but you are more interested in his little brother. Thorin tries his best to get you together but will he succeed? NO SMAUG or SAURON

Pairing: Frerin x Reader

Word Count: 1069

AN: I really should stop starting series. I really should. Also Tumblr needs more Frerin x Reader where, you know, Frerin actually lives. Also I really like the photo of Gerard Butler as Frerin so yeah. In case any of you wanted to imagine it. Ells out.

Part 2

“Thorin!” You call out before tackling said Prince to the ground. You two were thick as thieves. Your families had been friends since before you could remember and you grew up together and you couldn’t be happier.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Heya! I love the writing on this blog, and congrats on 200 followers! Can I have a short story of the reader and McCree having mutual feelings for one another (so crushes), but the reader is super shy and gets flustered with compliments or physical affection, and perhaps McCree teases them about it? Sorry I'm trash, this is my favorite thing ever.

Mod Lottie coming back from the grave, I’ve been so tired lately but I can’t leave you all hanging! Plus, this request right here is my jam. Sorry for the wait, hope you enjoy and have a great day!


“You’re not doing much by just staring at him (Y/n)! You should go talk to him. You don’t get to speak to him that much outside of missions and I’m sure he’d love talking to you!” Mei encourages you with her bubbly optimism. She was the only person you told about your little infatuation with the modern day cowboy but what you didn’t know was that almost everyone in the base caught on by now. Half of the agents knew how to read people to begin with but the rest knew because it was just easy to tell.

“I can barely stand near him without shrinking away much less approach him!” You respond already defeated, crossing your arms onto the table you were sitting at in the mess hall and resting your head on your arms.

“Now now, don’t put yourself down so much.” She says as she runs your back reassuringly, “Besides, I have a feeling you won’t be the one approaching him!” She says in a mischievous voice that you thought she only reserved for intense snow ball fights that she had a frighteningly natural talent for. Confused, you raise your head to look at Mei only to have your sight redirected to another figure in front of you both.

“Now darlin’ a cutie like you shouldn’t look so glum, the world looks so much better when you smile.” McCree says with a genuine smile as he sits down on the other side of the table, opposite from you and Mei. “What’s got them down in the dumps?”

“Ah, they’re just selling themselves short as usual. I try to lift their spirits but they never listen to me.” She explains, playfully chastising you while patting your back with a smile. She looks over to you and takes a double take at the expression on your face. You were red, frantically looking everywhere except Jesse, and you pinched at Mei’s jacket as a way to comfort you without completely hiding behind her.

“He… called me cute… wha?” You whisper to Mei and look into her eyes desperately for help.

“There’s a lot more where that came from sugar.” Jesse smirks as your eyes widen and you gasp. You grab onto Mei’s arm and try not to squeal. You wished you could just talk to him normally but no matter how hard you tried, your heart couldn’t stop racing and your voice couldn’t be anything but shaky around him.

“Ahh… I’m so sorry Jesse, they’re just a bit on the shyer side.” Mei explains as she continues to attempt to calm you down.

“No need to apologize for that. I find it mighty adorable.” That southern accent really got to you that time. You didn’t know how long you could take anymore of it. Suddenly, it was as though the angels called for you as your handheld holo pad began to beep. Winston was calling you and you wish you could hug him at that exact moment.

“Hello?” You answer a little too eagerly.

“Hi (Y/n). I just wanted to see how your weapon is working after I modified it. I hope it’s functioning as intended.” He inquired.

“Oh, yeah. It’s perfectly fine! Actually, it’s great! Thank you so much!” You chirp happily. Even when you were complimenting someone that was just a friend of yours, you still were a bit soft spoken.

“That’s great to hear! Well, I won’t bother you for much longer. I’ll see you-”

“Wait!” You thought quickly, “What was that?”


“You need me to come to your lab immediately for help on a gadget you’re making?” You say. Mei stifles a laugh at your over-explanation, she knew you were trying to get out of the situation quickly.

“What are you talking about?” Winston asks.

“No I’m not busy! I’ll come down right now, see you.” Not skipping a beat, you hang up and book it out of the mess hall and into the corridor.

“They can’t hide from you forever you know.” Mei says reassuringly.

“Trust me, I know. And I’m gonna have a bit o’ fun with this.” McCree chuckles slightly.
Attempt #1

It was early in the morning. You had to get up at the crack of dawn if you wanted to get something to eat before Soldier 76’s extensive morning training that he made specifically for you, Hana, and Junkrat. You three were the only agents required to go, everyone else could go optionally.

You met Hana and Jamison at the empty mess hall, exchanging sleepy grunts as you all made your way to get food. The three of you do your routine almost like clockwork. You’ve spent so many mornings together that you all operated like a well oiled machine together, on and off the field.

You were in your corner, preparing your usual breakfast food when you reached back to grab the glass of orange juice, the only drink that Soldier allowed you three in the morning, that Hana poured out for you. Instead of a glass of OJ, you picked up a hot mug of coffee.

“Huh?” You say as you noticed the dark warm beverage in your hand.

“Oh! Sorry darlin’ that’s mine. Although I could get used to ya handing me my mornin’ coffee everyday.” A voice that certainly didn’t sound like a 19 year old girl said as that same person took the mug from your hand. You looked to your side and your eyes met with Jesse’s.

“Oh, sorry.” Was all you mumbled as you went on with your routine. At this time of day, you weren’t alert enough to react to anything out of the ordinary. Frankly, the fire alarm could go off and your only reaction would be looking up at one of the blinking, beeping machines and saying ‘Oh, okay.’

“Could you give me some sugar? I mean actual sugar, but some of your lovin’ would do just fine.” He said, chuckling at his own line. You give a small laugh in reply as you handed over what he asked for, the only thing you actually registered was the request and the laugh.

You had finished putting everything on your plate when you suddenly realized…

“Um, uh…”

“Finally back from spacin’ out honey?” He grins as he slips an arm around your waist as he takes a sip of his coffee. The heat rushes to your cheeks and you start laughing nervously.

“Oh, uh, I’m late for Soldier and training is gonna be mad and I have to go now.” You spew out as you rush towards the training room. McCree simply laughs at your reaction, but is interrupted by Hana who was glaring at him.

“You’ve been standing there for five minutes, pass me the Frosted Flakes or leave.” She growls.

McCree does as he’s told, “My apologies lil’ lady, hope ya’ don’t take it out on me durin’ training.”

“What? You’re coming to the morning practice?” Hana asks as she pours her cereal into a bowl.

“I offered t’ help the old man with it.” He says as he leans on the counter.

“Ok but why?” She questioned further.

“Let’s say I’m on a little side mission.” Jesse smirks slyly as you came back to mind.

“Does it include blowin’ anythin’ up?” Jamie interrupts expectantly, only to be met by Jesse and Hana’s unimpressed glares.

“Oi! There’s no harm in askin’!”
Attempt #2

After thinking of a not so good excuse for why you absolutely had to eat in the training room, you had started doing stretches as you and Soldier waited for Hana and Jamie to arrive. And as if on cue, they both arrived, but with none other than McCree himself.

“UM?” You react almost like you’re offended and look towards Soldier for an explanation.

“Agents. McCree here will be joining us for our training today, he will be helping me give you a few extra pointers when needed.” He explains as Jesse goes to stand beside him. Jesse winks at you and it’s almost enough to make you faint.

Training in the morning was horrible, but training in the morning with your crush right there was agony.

He, unsurprisingly, paid special attention to you and he was having way too much fun with you. He took the liberty to get close to you and constantly ‘adjust your position properly’ whenever he got the chance.

Holding you by your hips with your back flush against his body, he leaned in close to whisper in your ear, “That’s right, just like that darlin’. Such a good lil’ student aren’t'cha?” He whispered huskily, giving you a tingling sensation in your ear that travelled all the way down to your neck. You blushed furiously as you struggled to keep your aim straight with such shaky hands.

“Don’t be afraid now. I got'cher back. Just fire the target, it’s not that hard.” He continued. Smug bastard. You couldn’t care less about your aim anymore and you just fired, trying to get out of this sinful Heaven you found yourself in. You managed to get a pretty decent shot despite everything Jesse was doing to you, even he was a little impressed.

“Like I said, one helluva student.” He had to top everything he’s done so far so he decided to give you a soft kiss on the forehead.

It was hard to function after all that, and Soldier ended up kicking McCree out of the room.

Later on that day, you found Mei and told her everything that happened at training.

“He didn’t lie when he said he was going to have a lot of fun with this huh?” Mei said, mostly to herself.

“What? What’s that supposed to mean?” You ask. Lo and behold, before she could get a word in, McCree approached you both.

“Evenin’ Mei. Could I have a minute with (Y/n)?” He asked politely.

“Oh of course. Don’t stress them out too much though.” Mei said with a laugh.

“Oh don’t you worry. I don’t think I’ve much more patience for that.” He shoots her a grin as if to say something that she seemed to understand. She nods enthusiastically as she goes to make some hot chocolate for you and her. She wondered if she should make a third cup.

McCree took a seat beside you and put a hand on your back as though to calm you down.

“Now look here darlin’, I don’t know how you haven’t noticed yet but I’ve been dyin’ ta’ make you mine for a while now. Been teasing you all day since you’re just too damn adorable but I don’t think I can be satisfied with just teasin’ ya anymore. So what do ya say? Would you be mine?” He embraces you as he holds back a chuckle at the sight of you blushing and trying to look at anything but him.

“Well, um, I kind of… might like you too.” You admit.

“Ya don’t say?” He laughs as he pulls you into a hug, “Well I’m glad ya do darlin’. I’m gonna take such good care of you cause you just bein’ beside me is enough for me to take on the world.”

After his words, you had a brief moment of leaving your inhibition behind and you hugged him so tight. You knew how much you longed for this moment but it didn’t really hit you until now. You teared up a little as you finally felt you could pour out your feelings. Your heart was pounding through your chest differently than it usually did, instead of heart aching longing, you felt pure love.

“I promise not to leave your side as long as you promise not to leave mine.” You say clearly and carefully.

“Course darl’. You’re the sweetest lil’ thing and I’m lucky to have you. I’m not ever gonna be letting you go.”

Sansukh Re-read Ch.1

Okay, first, FlukeofFate and a-sirens-lullaby did amazing art for this and it always reminds me of the cover art on certain books, fancy and giving you hints of what the book’s about but not spoiling anything. That really doesn’t have anything to do with the writing, but it’s amazing! Also, all of the art people have done for this? Amazing!

This is also probably a good time to admit that I read this before I had finished reading The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings books and before I’d watched all the movies. I knew that Thorin, Fili, and Kili died, it was impossible to avoid those spoilers on tumblr, but I’d put off starting this (despite how cool it sounded) because of that. I caved, however, and thus there were a few things that I read here before I was able to read them in the books (I think there were fifteen or twenty chapters of Sansukh by the time I finished reading both books).

Where was the Hobbit? Where was the frozen lake? Last he recalled, he had been bleeding to death at the edges of the silent battlefield. His madness had passed, but it had exacted too high a price. His family was spent and gone, his nephews cold and stiffened in death and rent with many wounds. Their soft-handed and great-hearted Burglar had forgiven him, even as he wept over Thorin’s broken body.

He did not deserve such forgiveness.

Poor Thorin, he’s got so much guilt and it takes him so long to work through it :’( I really just want to wrap him up in a soft blanket and tell him that he’ll be okay.

Thorin opened his new, useless eyes and glared into the darkness. “Then why, may I ask, did you make me so flawed?”

Thorin yelling at his Maker is both heartbreaking and a bit funny. Heartbreaking, because everything that he says, he believes. He really thinks that Mahal made a mistake, that he was flawed, that he was the reason things had gone wrong and that nothing else contributed it. A bit funny, though, because Thorin is literally yelling at a supremely powerful being who can’t even touch Thorin without him feeling the amount of power Mahal holds. And Thorin literally doesn’t care, he’s speaking his mind and Mahal just lets him vent.

“I lived less well. And amends are not of use,” Thorin spat. “That is not the point of them!”

Thorin understands this better than 90% of people I interact with on a daily basis.

“Everyone, this way! Found him, finally, how many sepulchres are there in this place?”

“Mahal only knows. Actually, he probably does. We should ask.”

As soon as I read the summary for this story, I was honestly hoping that someone would make a ‘Mahal only knows’ 'Well, then why don’t you ask him’ joke, and it happened in the first chapter!

“Best move out of the way,” Thrór muttered, and Thráin chuckled again.

“Aye, she won’t be patient much longer.”

“You mean she can be patient?”

“Don’t insult my wife, you old coot.”

There’s a lot of feels in this chapter, but it’s the funny bits like this that help me keep from breaking into tears so soon. I need to pace myself, after all, or there’ll be none left by the time I get to Dís and Dísith.

“By the way, Grandma is kind of terrifying,” Kíli said, and then he yelped as the lady Frís, daughter of Aís, Princess Under the Mountain and wife of Thráin, presumably pinched him.

“Behave, young one,” she said sternly, pulling back to stroke Thorin’s face again and thread her fingers through his close-cropped beard. “I’ll get to you two in a moment.”

“Terrifying,” said Fíli admiringly. “I kinda see where Mum gets it from, now.”

“Our grumpy little Dís as a mother,” said a young, laughing voice, a voice that rang like bells. “Let Middle-Earth tremble.”

Have I mentioned that I love Frís? Because I do, so much, and it’s things like this, as well as how compassionate she is, how organized she is, how loving…okay, there’s a lot to love about Frís. She’s one of my favorite Sansukh OCs.

“Shut up,” Thorin choked, and Frerin threw back his head and laughed his silver laugh and oh, Thorin had missed him, missed him so much.

“You shut up,” he said gently, and then Frerin was pulling his braid and abruptly Thorin was struck with a memory so vivid that he reeled with the strength of it, sent back to a hazy, golden time when he was five years old and the new baby kept chewing and tugging at his hair.

How every sibling reunion ever probably goes, minus the hair pulling. Or with more of it, depending on who the siblings are.

“I’m dreaming, yes?” he asked of no-one in particular. “Thorin doesn’t tease. He got brought back wrong. Mahal made a mistake.”

“Oh, you think you two were bad?” said Thrór archly. “These two had you beaten.”

“Why do you think he already knew most of your tricks?” added Frerin. “We thought up that stuff a century before you two.”

“It was always your idea,” Thorin muttered.

“And you always led the way,” Frerin said, and nudged him. “Such a dutiful Prince!”

Kíli wailed aloud, and Thorin could just picture the look of betrayal on his face. “Everything I knew is wrong,” he moaned.

Thorin smiled through his tears and Fíli chuffed a laugh. “Poor Kíli. He’s pulling at his hair again.”

“Tell him to stop. He doesn’t have hair enough to spare,” Thorin said, and Kíli’s outraged yelp made him smile all the harder.

Poor Kíli, he doesn’t know half of the things Thorin and Frerin got up to before he was even thought of. His pranking title is in serious jeopardy in light of this new information.

“I have a bone to pick with you,” said Fíli into his ear. “Why didn’t you or Mum ever tell me I looked like your mother and brother? I always thought I was the odd one out!”

“In this family?” Frís snorted. “When it comes to odd, we are rather spoiled for choice.”

I’ve said something similar to this so often in real life, that I actually laughed when I read this bit for the first time. My dog looked at me funny, apparently I’d woken her up from her nap.

“You weren’t so nice to us,” accused Fíli. “Mobbed us, you did! I thought we were under attack at first! I punched my own father on the nose!”

That surprised a true laugh out of Thorin, thought it hurt his chest. “You hit Víli?” he said.

“He did. And I stamped on Grandfather’s foot,” said Kíli.

Thráin cleared his throat. “And bit my hand,” he added sternly.

“Well, you try being blind as a bat and naked as a mole and having your dead grandfather commenting on your lack of beard, see how you like it,” Kíli grumbled.

Poor Víli, that’s probably not how he expected his reunion with his sons to go.

“Oh, it’s Thrór all over again, someone stop him,” groaned Frís. “We’re going to drown in the combined guilt of the Line of Durin before we ever lay a stone of Arda Remade.”

If all of the Durins are like Thorin, then Frís is probably right about that.

Heat Wave

Wrote this a while ago; based on:

Imagine you and the Company suffering in the heat because it’s just too damn hot.

The sweat trickled down the back of your neck, the air nearly suffocating you as you trod along the tree lined path. As usual, you trailed behind Kili and Fili, the two of them least likely to get annoyed with your random comments and unusual demanour.

As you wiped away the sweat on your brow, you couldn’t help but curse against whatever twisted trick that had brought you to this foreign place. You would have been happy to be back in your own world where air conditioning was very much a thing and you didn’t have to walk everywhere.

Keep reading

Begging (Care for the Company)

Pair: Thorin Oakenshield x Healer!Reader (a pretty short one too lol)

Genre: Arguing, Angst (still lots), Fluff (eventually)

Warning: Lots of blood (descriptive)

Inspired by prompts from imaginexhobbit and parthofstories24 I’m going to kill you!

A/N: Now that Thorin knows the truth, will he put his stubbornness aside to gain the forgiveness of the woman he degraded? Or will he leave her behind for good. 


I awoke to sunshine shining right into my eyes, sitting up with a groan as Bilbo bounced across the room, ‘Up and about Y/N! Its an absolutely marvellous day and the breakfast chimes have already been rung-though I don’t really know anyone who can actually hear them besides the elves-But anyway time for breakfast! Come along now!’

I stared at him as he finally came around to stand before the end of my bed with a large grin, having pulled a gown and laid it over the chair near my vanity, ‘Where are we going?’

‘I thought we might take a stroll before breakfast! Just you and me.’ At this I couldn’t help but smile, finally taking the initiative to get out of bed, ‘Well why not!’

With Bilbo’s help, I slipped into the lavender gown, smiling as he knelt to slip my shoes on before wrapping the shawl around my shoulders gently. He even went out of his way to rush out of the room, only to return with a bunch of daisies that he placed in my braided hair.

Finally, we left the confines of my chambers and walked across the beautiful terraces, passing through the gardens and waterfalls that hung in the centre of the village.

The sound of the trickling waters brought peace to my mind, Bilbo smiling at the content that was visible on my face, ‘How are you feeling?’

‘Much better actually, thank you! This is really refreshing to get out without sulking around. Last night though was pretty okay too, Balin came to my chambers and I was able to let it all out-But I’m sure you already knew that!’ I said that with a smirk as Bilbo just smiled. ‘Gossip is strong within the line of Durin.’

Keep reading

Little Brat

Overall Summary: You are the oldest of the Durins and you live your life happily until the day Smaug attacks. That is when you lost the trust of your little brother, Thorin.

Chapter Summary: You inform Gandalf about Dol Guldur and Thorin throws yet another insult.

Pairing: Thorin x Sister!Reader; OC x Reader.


Previous Chapter: Chapter 13

Next Chapter: Chapter 15

A/n: Okay so I wanted to post the next three chapters as one whole one, but there is so left much to write that I will not be able to get it done before I go camping so I’m just going to leave you all with this. I have 4k words written, but I am missing the escape from Mirkwood scene and dwarves meet Bard scene and that is too much for me right now. I will try to work on the next chapters while I’m gone, but that is so unlikely. Anyway, like I said I’m going to be camping so I’m going to be awol for three days. Anyway have a good weekend.

A few days later, when you are all healed up, you are packing your things onto a pony. You felt well enough to travel and for that you were glad. You mount on of the ponies and Gilrin pulls up next to you. You smile at him.

“Alright?” he asks, hazel eyes sparkling at you. You nod at him, smiling back. You look up to find Thorin glaring at Gilrin.

He feels your gaze and looks at you. You raise your brow as if challenging him to say something and he promptly sticks his tongue out at you before turning his horse to face the other way. He was such a child that you sometimes forgot that he was 195 years old.

Keep reading

Request for @mu5icluv3r97
I hope this is okay let me know what you think I can always re-do!

Lots of fluff and such!
(Requests still open)
“I think you should name it Thorin if it’s a boy” Kili shot his uncle a look and you couldn’t help but laugh. “If I tell you I’ll consider your input would you believe me?” Thorin smiled and shook his head. It had been 8 months so far and the swell of you belly had grown to an impressive size bump. As the time drew closer to giving birth you had both decided it was time to start thinking about names again. “I’m not calling our child Thorin” Kili say down behind you and you scooted back to lean against his chest. He placed his arms around your waist and rested his hands on your bump, giggling quietly when the baby kicked. “You should name it after your favorite and only brother” fili added. “I’d rather name it Thorin” Kili said smirking at his brother. “It could be a girl” you say looking between the faces of the line of durin. “Could be” Kili planted a kiss behind your ear and smiled against your skin. A lot of attention and care was given to you more recently from Kili’s family members, his mother was giving you advice on what to eat and drink to help stop nausea and to help with aches you seem to be getting frequently in your lower back. Your breasts ached as well but there wasn’t much to do about that, Kili had some ideas but anything sexual was off the table; much to his disappointment. “Are you ready to be a father?” Thorin asked and then re worded his question “I mean, do you feel prepared for when the baby comes?” Kili mumbled a reply into your neck and you nudged him to speak louder. “Of course I’m ready I was raised by the best father figure” Kili’s eye caught Thorin’s and you smiled widely as Thorin’s eyes became glazed with tears which he quickly wiped away. “Go hug him” you whispered to Kili and he complied walking over to his uncle. Fili sat down beside you smiling. “Aye we were raised by the best” you placed a hand on his knee. “You’ll be an uncle soon” you pointed out. Fili nodded slowly and placed his hand over yours. “You’re an amazing wife to Kili and an even better sister to me, I’m very glad you’re part of our family, very glad” his words brought tears to your own eyes. “It’s where I belong” you reply “with family” “with family” he repeated and you leaned over to hug him. You stood up and started to walk away from the trio. Kili ran after you “is everything okay?” He asked his eyes flicking over your face. “Kili, love, I’m fine I just need to pee, your child is doing their very best to make my bladder burst” his body immediately relaxed and he lifted your hand to his lips. “We’ll go home after yeah?” You nodded and carried on walking, your hand protectively resting on your bump.
“You know (y/n)?” Kili called from the kitchen. You were currently in bed reading whilst Kili was making you both a drink. “What?” You called back continuing to read. “I just thought do you want me there for the birth?” He was in the doorway now holding the two cups and handing you yours. “Thank you, and of course I want you there you’re my husband, the father, I want you by my side, you promised me that’s where you’ll always be” he climbed under the sheets next to you and grinned. “I was hoping you’d say that” you placed your cup on the side. “Kili…” He tilted his head towards you. “Are you..are you still attracted to me even though I’m like this?” You had fears for what your body would look like after you gave birth and you didn’t want Kili to be repulsed. He sat up straight and leaned over to kiss you. It was a long kiss and you didn’t want to pull away, so you tangled your fingers in his hair and pulled him closer, the stubble of his beard brushing against your smooth skin. He pulled away slightly and rested his forehead on yours. “I am never going to be un attracted to you (y/n) you are /so/ beautiful” he laced his fingers with yours and showered your face and neck with kisses as you giggled and tried to push him off. “I love you Kili” he stopping kissing you and just looked, his eyes dancing in the candle light. “I love you (y/n)” the baby took the opportune time to kick and Kili let out a low laugh before placing his hand on your stomach. “And I love you, and you’re mother loves you too” you loved when Kili talked to the baby through your bump it was adorable, even when you’d fall asleep Kili would usually stay awake and whisper stories to your unborn child, tonight seemed no different. “Two years ago I married you mother” he said smiling up at you “aye you did” he kissed your stomach and then moved up to kiss you. “I just wish I had married you sooner” “oh yeah? Why’s that?” He kissed you again and pulled the blanket up over you both. “So I could say that you were mine for longer” by now you would’ve thought blushing at his words was in the past but clearly you still get flushed. “You’re cute” he whispered wrapping his arm around you pulling you to him. It was the early hours of the morning when you felt strange. Kili was lying on his stomach spark out and you decided it was best to leave him. You climbed out of bed and staggered to the toilet, but nothing happened. You made yourself a drink but couldn’t bare to actually lift it to your lips and the thought of food made your stomach sick. You felt hot and your hair started to stick to your head as beads of sweat started to drip down your body. “Kili!” You called, trying to navigate your way back to the bedroom but ended up collapsing on the floor curled up in pain. “KILI!” you heard footsteps running towards you. “(Y/n)!” He shouted and crouched in front of you “what is it?!” You couldn’t form a coherent sentence so instead he carefully lifted you up in his arms. He looked at the floor and you tilted your head to see what he was looking at, water. “The baby’s coming!” You tried to make sense of the situation but the crippling pain near your hips made you scream out in pain instead. You don’t recall how you got to this strange bed but some how you must’ve. Your eyes adjusted to the bright light of the candles and lanterns around you. “Kili..” You croaked. “I’m here, I’m right by your side” he stood up and held a cup of water to your lips you accepted the cool liquid gratefully. “The baby..” You started but he shushed you and stroked your hair. “Their just coming earlier than expected, that can be normal for some births” your hand rested on your bump and you smiled up at him. “You’re amazing” he kissed you gently and squeezed your hand, soon enough the room had two experienced midwives occupying it as well as you and Kili. “(Y/n)? The pain you have been experiencing is contractions, when they start becoming more frequent it means you needs to push okay?” One said softly. Kili stood up and held your hand in both of his. “Squeeze my hand when you push okay? It might help” you nodded and waited until the contractions became frequent before starting to push. Kili’s mother had told you of the pain but actually going through it was something else. You didn’t plan to scream as much as you did but hell it felt like your baby was ripping you in too. “GET IT OUT OF ME!” You screamed again and squeezed Kili’s hand so tight he yelped in pain. “(Y/n) it’s okay! It’s nearly out, take deep breathes, stay calm I’m here, I’m going to help you through this” just hearing his voice managed to help calm you and he helped you through the breathing, demonstrating so you could follow. You knew you were nearly breaking his hand but he showed no sign of moving them away from you. The midwives were praising you but you kept your gaze on Kili and zoned them out. He was truly amazing, how he was staying calm you had no idea but his support was overwhelming. You didn’t have much more time to admire your husband as a whole new rack of pain ripped through your body. “It’s coming, we can see the head.” Kili peered down, not that you cares you just wanted it out of you. When he came back into your view he had tears in his eyes. “Kil-AHHHHHHHH!” He told you when to push and kept you going through each push so you wouldn’t quit and eventually you heard the screaming of your child. “It’s a (b/g)!” You threw your head back against the pillows as the midwives sorted your baby out and the next thing you knew Kili was holding the baby in his arms. He sat down on the edge of the bed crying with happiness and handed you your new baby (b/g). (His/her) eyes were closed but as you carefully stroked (his/her) tiny hand (he/she) wrapped (his/her) fingers around your one. “Kili look!” You whispered, tears spilling down your own face. “(He/she) is so beautiful” he said. You moved up the bed so Kili could climb in beside you. You cuddled close to his body as his arm draped over your shoulder. The other resting against your new baby. “I am so proud of you (y/n)” you looked up into his eyes and felt like you were falling in love with him all over again. You pressed your lips to his and then rested your head against his shoulder. “I am so glad to be spending the rest of my life with you…as a family” “don’t worry baby (b/g) we are going to keep you safe because you now belong to our family” Kili said gently. “And we love you very much” later on family members visited a few at a time. When it came to Fili’s turn he couldn’t stop crying and had to go back outside. Thorin currently had the baby bundled in his arms rocking (him/her) gently. “You two are going to be exceptional parents” Kili hugged you tight against his chest and you tangled your legs with his. “Like you said, you learned from the best” Kili nudged your nose with his and pecked your lips twice. “I still think you should call it Thorin” and you both laughed before lying back against the pillows.

FiKi Day Five: Alternate Universe: Foxy Dwarves

This silly little universe is co-created with linane-art.  :)  And yes, there may be more little ficlets in the future!


Kíli knew, of course, that his brother had to practice his alternate form daily.  Everyone did, in the early days, and even a lot of the adults chose to spend an hour or so as foxes each day.  But it felt-


They’d been together their whole lives.  And now, just because he was younger, Kíli had finally been left behind.  He wouldn’t find out what his fox looked like for another five years, at best – Fíli had changed earlier than most, which meant it could be even longer before Kíli would be able to run the forest with Fíli and their mother.

Kíli sighed and curled up on his bed, feeling terribly lonely for the first time in his life.  

He felt his ears droop and didn’t even try to stop them, stubbornly ignoring all of Thorin’s warnings about letting his fox features give him away.  Today, if his ears wanted to pout and his tail wanted to curve in tight, he was going to let them.  

Kíli closed his eyes tight and tried not to think about what it must feel like to run through the forest on four feet, following the scent of small prey, warm despite the snow thanks to thick, luxurious fur.

Something warm pushed under his hand.

Kíli opened his eyes and looked down.  

Fíli blinked up at him.  

Everyone had known Fíli would be a beautiful fox – while red was the most common color outside the line of Durin, which tended to silvers and blacks, Fíli had been born with pale red-blond ears and a tail in the same color, tipped by white.  But he really was gorgeous and unusual, the ruff around his shoulders thicker than the rest of his fur, and his eyes the same blue as his dwarf counterpart.  

Kíli’d seen him, of course; he’d been there for the first change, seen the shock and pain in his brother’s eyes – wanted to help but had to stand back as Fíli’s body reshaped itself into his Other for the first time.  But Fíli’d been immediately whisked away, and now, several weeks later, was the first time Kíli had seen him so close.

“What do you want?” he grumped.

Fíli made a soft noise in his throat and pushed at his hand again, making it slide down his nose a bit.

“You could just turn into a dwarf and we could have a normal conversation.”

Fíli nipped his thumb.


If a fox could roll his eyes, Fíli did; then he repeated the motion of lifting Kíli’s hand with his nose and sliding it gently down his muzzle.

Kíli sighed and gently stroked his fingers along the pointed nose, over his brother’s head, scratching behind his ear in the secret place Fíli loved in dwarf form, too.  He was…soft.  Softer, Kíli thought, than mother’s black fox form, more silky.  

It figured Fíli would not only change early, but be beautiful, unusual, and pet-able as well.

“Aren’t you supposed to be off running in the woods and doing fox things while I sit here staring at the wall?” Kíli asked moodily.  

The fox’s mouth opened in a little grin, and Fíli wiggled up over Kíli’s crossed knees to plop into his lap.  

Kíli bit his lip.  “This is cruel,” he muttered.  “You know I can’t change too.”

Fíli could have changed back into a dwarf – of course he could, one form didn’t rule the other – but instead he pushed up and bumped his head against Kíli’s chin.

The fox couldn’t talk.  Dwarves who changed tried on a fairly regular basis to explain how the fox form’s mind worked – how you were yourself and yet different, but it never made sense to anyone who hadn’t yet found his fox.  Fíli’d tried, the first night, but it came out sounding like riddles.

And yet-

Another bump, a soft noise, almost a bark but not quite, and those blue eyes were looking at him with the same concern they always did.  

“…Are you trying to baby me?  While you’re a fox?”

Fíli grinned – there was no other word for it – and flopped playfully onto his back, feet in the air.  His right front foot was snowy white and the others blond.  

“You’re not my pet, Fíli.”

Fíli wagged his tail.

“And you can’t just make everything better by acting like one.”

Fíli thumped him in the chin with one paw.  

“I’m still pissed I can’t change yet.”

Fíli lifted his head and gently took Kíli’s hand in his sharp new teeth-then bit down.


Fili looked unrepentant.   In fact, he looked pleased, and how Kíli could read his brother’s expression on that pointy face he had no idea – but he could and, despite himself, he laughed.

“Okay, FINE.  I’ll scratch your belly and let you distract me this once, but never again.”  Gently, with something that felt a bit like awe, he rested his hand on the narrow expanse of Fíli’s chest – so much more delicate than his square, muscular brother was in his dwarf form.  Carefully, he dug in his fingers in a light scratch.

Fíli’s eyes fell half shut and, to Kíli’s extreme amusement, his left back leg started to wiggle a bit.

“Your leg never did that as a dwarf,” he teased, and Fíli’s eyes narrowed at him.

Of course, Kíli had never, ah, scratched his brother’s chest before, but that didn’t mean he’d never petted Fíli.  Family members always helped with the maintenance of ears and tail.  When they were small, Kíli had considered Fíli’s tail his personal property.  Whenever they were somewhere crowded, their mother would order him to stay close to his brother – and what better way to stay close than to grab his fluffy blond tail and hold on, despite his 12 year old brother’s loud protests?

(That he’d also been known to hug Fíli’s tail in his sleep was something Kíli both vehemently denied and swore Fíli to silence about.)

“Oh, and when I do get my fox form-”  Fíli opened his eyes and yipped, looking up at Kíli’s own Durin-dark ears, “-you’re going to pay for that bite.”

Fíli didn’t look particularly frightened.

anonymous asked:

hi! i'm sorry for asking but i read your meta about fili and i was wondering, what makes you think that fili would not have been affected by the gold sickness? being of the line of durin is like a guarantee to fall to that madness

Oh, god. Okay, here we go. Let’s just hope that this doesn’t end up as long as my meta about Fíli. 
(If anybody is confused, this is the post we’re talking about.)

First of all, I never said that Fíli or Kíli are immune to the gold sickness. Because they’re not.

Sure, they’re the merriest and happiest and most cheerful of all the dwarves, but they’re still dwarves. And dwarves are naturally greedy. They feel a strong need to protect what belongs to them and it’s in their nature to be „attracted“ to gold and gems.

But Fíli and Kíli bear an even heavier burden, being of the Line of Durin. They know about the sickness, they know how it drove their grandfather and great-grandfather mad. And, worst of all, they have to see their own uncle succumbing to it. They’re aware of this curse and they know it might affect them, too. 

But unlike Thorin, Fíli and Kíli don’t feel such a strong need to get back their gold, or even Erebor. I think they followed Thorin out of loyalty, the prospect of gold probably never really appealed to them.

They don’t feel the urge to get their gold back, because it was never theirs to begin with.

They probably don’t really feel like it was taken from them, they don’t see it as their own, because Smaug invaded Erebor long before Fíli was even born.

Thorin, on the other hand, was there when it happened. He witnessed how Smaug destroyed everything he and his father and grandfather had built up. His „connection“ to the gold is a lot stronger, he knows it’s his and that no one but him has any kind of claim on that gold.

But Fíli and Kíli grew up far away from all that. They heard stories, but they have no connection to Erebor, they’ve never seen it, they don’t know what it’s like.

Fíli knows that one day he will be king, but I think he cares more about his people than the gold in Erebor.

Thorin was raised by Thrain, and Thrain was raised by Thror. From early childhood, Thorin learnt to value the importance of gold and power. They instilled in him the belief that gold has to be cherished above everything else.

But Fíli and Kíli were raised by their mother, Dís. We don’t know much about her, but I assume she taught them that there’re more important things than gold. I choose to believe that thanks to Dís‘ upbringing and education, Fíli and Kíli learnt that family and loyalty and love are more precious than gold.

They actually care so little about gold, that upon entering the treasury in Erebor, they completely ignore the gems and jewels and make good use of the instruments instead.

 „Fili and Kili were almost in merry mood, and finding still hanging there many golden harps strung with silver they took them and struck them; and being magical (and also untouched by the dragon, who had small interests in music) they were still in tune. The dark hall was filled with a melody that had long been silent. But most of the dwarves were more practical; they gathered gems and stuffed their pockets, and let what they could not carry far back through their fingers with a sigh.“

This is so relevant because it shows just how much pleasure they take in simple things. They litereally don’t give a shit about the gold. THIS IS SO IMPORTANT.

As you can see, they don’t share Thorin’s love for gold, in fact, they know it’s absolutely wrong. There’s this passage from the book that says:

“So grim had Thorin become, that even if they had wished, the others would not have dared to find fault with him; but indeed most of them seemed to share his mind - except perhaps old fat Bombur and Fili and Kili.” 

There. Fíli and Kíli know that Thorin’s obsession is unhealthy and they know that it could destroy him.

So basically, Fíli and Kíli have learnt that gold is not everything. Had they grown up in Erebor, they might have been more like Thorin, might have shared his mindset.

But as it is, they grew up far away from Erebor and they were raised by their mother who showed them that they have something that is more precious than all the gold in Erebor: They have each other.


I could not explain the tremendous hollowness and grief going through all the tags trying to find the perfect gifs for this particular post, I have done that at the Faculty’s computer room actually, and my friends sitting beside me asked if I was okay because she noticed me gasping with one hand on the chest as if I was in the physical pain…so yeah…

Day 23: A Scene Which Make You Cry

Though he has done a lot of great works; giving everything he’s got to make those characters come to life, from all the long-list throughout his entire career, there is only one particular character who has managed to make me cry endlessly…and dare I say I still haven’t got over him.

But First I wanted to talk about other characters, I may not weep for their fates but that doesn’t mean that they didn’t move me in a significant level….

Guy of Gisbourne… For me Guy was never a villain, maybe because I have always fascinated by villains and the “nice guy who loves the heroine and always be there for her even though he knows she is destined to be with the hero” ( I don’t believe the American or European have this kind of similar concept that we have here in my country, I know that sometimes Japanese or Korean do entertain the idea in their series or movies, but it is something prominent in my country really, like almost every book or film). I view Guy to be an Anti-Hero, misunderstood a bit, He was mean and vile of course, but he had his reason. I sympathise with Guy; it pains me to see Marian using him throughout the entire series. But his death didn’t make me cry, it was noble, it was almost mercy for him giving the fact that he’s probably living in shame and self-blame punishing himself for the rest of his life, had him survive. I mean, for me, it is clear that Guy in season 3 had entirely lost the purpose of keep on living, He has a death-wish even.

Same goes for John Proctor, the fact that he got arrest or trialed like that angered me. But I accepted his death since it is something essential to his core belief and his character. I have nothing but admiration for his decision.

I feel bad for John Porter and the fact that he had to go out that way; the execution was so realistic that I think people had a hard time believing that such a great agent would be eliminated easily like that, but I think the possibility is quite great, still no, my tears did not flow for Porter.

I still haven’t watched Spooks beyond season 7. I understand that there is to be quite an emotional scene regarding Lucas and his time in the Russian’s grasp, I have seen some gifs made of that scene here on Tumblr, it appears fairly intense still seeing that I haven’t actually watched it, I cannot make any fair comment on that…

That leaves me…with Thorin Oakenshield…

To be honest though, it isn’t exactly a scene, it’s more like the whole last hour of the Battle of Five Armies, so don’t get too surprise if this post in the end turns out to be a close-recap plus my reaction.

I went to see the movie; knowing before hand all too well what were to be their fates, yet still I wailed, my tears literally fell down upon my cheeks, it fell down like a flowing of river actually; running on and on. And it happened every single time, I watched it. Up until now, I have managed to watch the last installment in the Trilogy only 4 times; 3 in the cinema and 1 when the DVD came out. I am, just as you are, waiting eagerly for the extended cut.

I don’t know why, but this movie and each character’s fates spoke to me on a very personal level.

I felt my heart literally drop down to the floor when I first saw this scene; I was screaming internally. There’s simply no escape for Fili, no matter how great a warrior he is, there’s no way to fight when you are hopelessly outnumbered.


I know we really didn’t given that great a chance to develop any deep attachment for Fili, he didn’t have much role like Kili has with the romance with Tauriel but this scene and Dean O'Gorman delivered the lines and conveyed the feeling quite perfectly. And this is where my tears started to fall.


I had to mention Fili even though his death and my emotional reaction didn’t really seem to be relevant with the topic because…

Look at his uncle’s reaction, here. That mouth being slightly opened as if to mouth silently “no” or “oh God” and the looks in his eyes, the disbelief, the sorrow and despair. One more corpse to his cause, insisting on his failure as a leader,as a king, as an uncle, the death of his sister’s son and his heir. I speak of Failure in the sense that Thorin couldn’t protect him and it was Thorin himself who gave out the order for Fili and Kili to go scouting. In a sense, Thorin sent Fili, unintentionally, to his death. At least, this is what I think going on in his mind.

Kili’s death is interesting in itself, I think it was in China that someone raised a point and asked Richard that… till the end, Thorin didn’t know that Kili was killed… Thorin made that choice;sacrificing his life to kill Azog and dying, not knowing that the last heir in the line of Durin (well, at least the direct line) was already dead.

Then… of course, we have reached this heart-wrecking brutally and yet brilliantly executed scene.


I want to raise a glass to Martin Freeman and Richard Armitage in this scene,it is just… you know I’ve just watched it again to reassure that I got the sequence in the right order, and here I am crying…again.


I think there’s no word…

that can fully and truly describe

this scene.

It’s just…


(x)  I mean, Bilbo’s denial and his feeble attempt literally torn my heart in to pieces. He was telling Thorin “Don’t you dare” and pleading for the dwarf to hold on…

(x)  saying to Thorin in vain that the eagles which had once saved them were finally here.

(x) Only to realise…this time it was too late.


The scene at the gate of Erebor also memorable though it’s more like I crying for my childhood memory of basically growing up with the Lord of the rings than grieving over Thorin in particular, though I love the fact that Bilbo wasn’t able to quite bring himself tell Balin exactly what Thorin meant to him. It was not until 6 months after…that Bilbo could finally manage to say out loud the significance of the Dwarf King.

(x) And he went in realising the change both in his house and his personalities from the beginning of the adventure till now. The reference of the handkerchief is beautiful; It literally made us see the change in Bilbo from the Hobbit who demanded that the company turned back to retrieve his handkerchief to the Hobbit who could wield the sword in defense of his friend and be “there and back again” , then the last scene when the camera zoomed in, revealing that after all those years, on Bilbo’s 111th Birthday he was thinking, reminiscing about Thorin and their journey together…

A quick reflection on the Durin family, or rather lack of one.

So a year after Battle of the Five Armies came out, I thought I’d try and rewatch it again, just to see if I couldn’t get a different perspective of it (and try to actually like it, but *sigh* I can’t, sorry). A lot of people have commented on how there’s a lot of ripoff from Lord of the Rings in the Hobbit trilogy, and while I certainly won’t deny it, one of the ripoffs I noticed was this one:

Please tell me I’m not the only person to have noticed this?

While I think that Thorin isn’t as much of a douche as movie!Denethor (who isn’t really like that in the book), I couldn’t help but still feel the same way about him when it came to family: sorry Thorin, but blatant obvious favouritism is obvious :p.

It was probably not intentional from the writers behind the production, but after watching Battle of the Five Armies, it was the immediate link I made between the two families. Where Denethor only seems to be aware that he only has one son, Boromir, well Thorin is only aware of his one nephew, Kili. Faramir and Fili, I felt, were completely isolated within their own families.

Well not Faramir, not entirely, the one flashback scene in the Two Towers EE (it was the Two Towers, right?) between him and Boromir was enough to establish a strong bond as brothers, you got the idea that Boromir cared for Faramir and that the brotherly love was returned.

Boromir also stood up to Denethor belittling Faramir and his contribution because he cared about his sibling, and I think it was also a good way for the audience to care about Faramir too. I think a lot of cinema-goers got attached to Boromir, they liked him and while he wasn’t always in the right, seeing him die was sad, so getting to see him again (even if it was in a flashback) and getting invested in his brother, I think it made the audience care about Faramir too even if we didn’t get to see that much of him before The Return of the King.

Plus, the parental love Faramir was withheld in the movie (and probably, going by movie!verse, withheld while he grew up too), was sort of made up for with him finding Eowyn. It’s not the same love as the love of a brother or a father, but Faramir is still on the receiving end of some kind of love, he knows that at least one person he cares about cares for him in return.

Fili and Kili….. Yeah, as soon as they enter Mirkwood, I’m sorry, but they’re not brothers anymore. Fili becomes “the responsible big brother whose only role is to support the hot male love interest” (I noticed that most of his lines are something including “Kili” in them, actually), they don’t interact, they barely talk to each other, and the “caring for my brother” only goes one way, Kili never gives back in return, and I felt the movies really shot themselves in the foot with that. By privileging a silly love story (well not love, really, “I could have anything down my trousers” is definitely not a line to begin a love story, it’s uncomfortable and I feel it’s downright insulting towards the love interest), the movie passed on the bond that could have been established between Kili and Fili, and which could have made their deaths a lot more emotional than what we got. Seriously, is there any other reason for the Durins to die separately than proving that Tauriel and Kili were really truly in love? (Because I’m still hell-bent on blaming the pseudo-love story as the reason why Thorin, Kili and Fili didn’t die together, like they should have).

Although thinking about it, while I have my guess that the love story was deemed more important than family love was because it would give more Kili and more Kili meant more money because Kili was the good looking dwarf that was there to reel in the twelve year-olds, I think maybe the original plot for the Durin family might also have been cancelled right from the start when Thorin/Fili/Kili didn’t have good chemistry when Rob Kazinsky was still set to play Fili (there’s a set of pictures from the make-up test of the three of them together I think, and those three definitely do not look like a happy family). But then again, Rob Kazinsky was only there at the very beginning, he left quite quickly, from what I’ve gathered, so was the Durin family dynamic deemed useless from that early on?

Yeah, this certainly doesn’t scream close family to me, whether it’s Thorin/Fili, Thorin/Kili (albeit a Armitage and Turner are slightly closer to eachother in a later frame, as they both leave to the right, whereas Kazinsky leaves to the left…) or Fili/Kili. Was this what might have put the studio off delving into family dynamics? If so, it’s a real shame that they didn’t pick it back up after Dean O'Gorman joined the cast. They had time for Alfrid, Tauriel, Legolas and the Dol Guldur sequences but not enough time to spare a few scenes to establish family rleationships? :( (And not just the Durins, it would have been nice to see into the Nori/Dori/Ori family too, as well as the other dwarves).

Regarding the Durins though, not only did they sacrifice the brotherly bond, but also the uncle/nephew bond too. In Lord of the Rings, we got to see that Denethor is proud of Boromir, we got to see him actually feel something for his kin, we even saw him sort of “repent” for the love he withheld from Faramir when he realizes he’s not dead when he tries to burn him. It might only last a few seconds, and while it certainly doesn’t show a deep bond between them or make up for how Denethor treated Faramir, the fact that he realizes his mistake and feels something a little deep for Faramir shows the audience that he didn’t completely ignore him.

In the Hobbit movies, Thorin is clearly shown to be overprotective of Kili:

And while they didn’t share that much dialogue together, I got that he really cared for him (makes me wonder why they chose to not have Thorin know about his death in Battle of the Five Armies too…), but he couldn’t give a damn about Fili, and it goes to a point where I think Thorin isn’t even aware that he exists sometimes.

I think that, had the movie spared a scene or two to have Thorin care about him, his death would have been more poignant too. I don’t hate Fili’s death, I rather like the idea behind it, but the fact that it’s completely useless is my problem with it: Thorin went up to Ravenhill precisely to kill Azog and take revenge on him for killing Thror and take out the brains behind the orc army, so whether Azog killed another person or not, it wasn’t what would urge Thorin into fighting him seen as how he’d already lost a loved one to him. And I’m not even mentioning how Fili’s left for the crows after the battle, I’d been hoping we might see Dwalin pick up his body in the extended edition, but apparently Dwalin went to try and save Thorin (?). I think Armitage did the best with what he was given for the scene in itself, but because the relationship wasn’t there beforehand, Fili’s death was a cheap excuse for shock factor and was comepletely useless.

The thing is, where Faramir at least had Eowyn’s love to make up for the lack of love he received (Boromir loved him too, it’s obvious, but he’s dead by the time we’re introduced to Faramir), Fili had nobody.

Kili, I was okay with in An Unexpected Journey. I’m not a fan of the “brash and reckless teenage boys” trope that the girls seem to fawn over, and his personality made me a little uncomfortable, but I could still deal with it. But when Desolation of Smaug came out, I definitely didn’t like him anymore, as he was reduced to the good loking male from the love triangle, and the writers tried to give him more screen time to reel the girls in by giving him his own independent plot from his family. I get that Thorin needed his own plot as he’s the main character (with Bilbo), but Kili didn’t. His plot should have revolved around his family, his brother and the company, not some far-fetched unbelievable and bland romance, and because of the Kili/Tauriel plot, I think Kili’s character really suffered. And unfortunately, by Battle of the Five Armies, I felt he was very unsympathetic (to Fili whom he literally pushes away from helping him and even to Tauriel, whom he makes uncomfortable when he simpers on the side of the lake with her):

And he definitely didn’t care about his family. Sure, he got the “shout at Thorin” scene, but I really didn’t get any family vibe off that (and he certainly doesn’t think of going back to Thorin once after Fili’s death), it could have been any dwarf really, it was only Kili because he was merchandisable.

I’m sure Kili and Fili could have had a bond like Boromir and Faramir (which, again, established the two as better brothers in one scene than Kili and Fili in three movies), it’s just such a pity the writers deemed familial love between them (and Thorin) not as worthy as uninspired romance, especially when you consider it could have given us much better death scenes, had they just stuck to the book for once. :(