i just felt like posting these because reasons

do yall have any fucking idea how bad posts like that make gay men feel? trans men? i seriously feel like i shouldnt even have to say “think of the gays and trans” but i have to because yall just dont get it. when i thought i was a guy i felt horrible about myself constantly because of how this dipshit website talks about how horrible and ugly men are. it’s horrible and hurtful and there’s no reason for it other than to be mean and hateful for the sake of it. grow the fuck up.

tbh maybe this is unpopular but i also understand why vex would feel closer to tary than scanlan now? because i get why people are upset but i also think it’s important to remember that scanlan singled out vex for bringing kaylie and yelled at her and said that they only went to the feywild because of her “fucking daddy issues” meanwhile she literally bonded with tary because of her “daddy issues”

like idk i absolutely understand why scanlan lashed out and i was supportive of him leaving but i also think it’s perfectly reasonable for vex to feel like something broke between them and she’s just not as close with scanlan after that? because i’ve had a friendship break down like that and it’s not fun at all so idk maybe im just projecting but like……. idk

BTS reacting to you being their crush and you keeping calling them cute and squeezing their cheeks.

IM BACK TO POSTING REQUESTS!!

I was gone because of school and I felt overwhelmed but I’m okay now!!


Jin/seokjin: You would be squeezing him and calling him cute and just babying him. The reasoning you were doing this is because you like him and you wanted to see how he would react, but you didn’t know he liked you back so when you were doing all of this he would just blush and let you do it since he liked getting attention from you and obviously you calling him cute.

Originally posted by jjilljj

Suga/Yoongi: He would pretend not to like it but when you would just hug him out of nowhere he would crack a smile and be so happy that this was happening. He would probably tell you after that he likes you and would ask you out.

Originally posted by jeonsshi

J-hope/Hoseok: He would be so extra and make squealing noises and dance for no reason, but he would also tell you you’re cuter and praise you since he didn’t want all the attention he wanted you to have it.

Originally posted by nnochu

Rapmon/Namjoon: HE WOULD JUST SMILE AND LOOK DOWN AT THE FLOOR AND YOU WOULD POKE HIS DIMPLES. He would love being praised by you because he felt loved and he also felt like a baby ( I feel like he’s a switch cause he’s so cute and baby-ish, but then like fuck me up daddy) but he would just squeeze you’re cheeks gaining confidence and telling you you’re cute too.

Originally posted by choke-me-namjoon

Jimin: He usually doesn’t like when people pinch his cheeks but he loves when you do it, he would blush and just smile at you and look the other way trying to avoid you so you wouldn’t see him blushing.

Originally posted by bwipsul

V/Taehyung: HE WOULD BE SO CUTE AND BUBBLY AND HE WOULD CHUCKLE A LOT. This big baby would LOVEEEEEE to be praised and being called cute. He would just say thank you and blush but soon after you would hug you for minutes and not let go of you.

Originally posted by pangguk

Jungkook: HE WOULD SMILE SO BRIGHT AND BIG, YOU COULD SEE HIS BUNNY TEETH. He would be the one to praise you but when you started doing it he would just act cute, maybe walk away cause he couldn’t take it.

Originally posted by allforcollection

-lily❤️

“Darling, you look perfect tonight”

AN // Okay I know I disappeared from the writing scene for like 80 years (soz) but I’m back and I have nothing to do for 2 months so I can guarantee you’ll be sick of me by the end of it.

Requested // Yes

Request here

TW // none

Darling, you look perfect tonight

He can’t remember a time when he didn’t love her. He remembers how he watched her stand up for the kid who was pushed over in the playground when they were both small, remembers how she’s always been the strongest person with the softest heart. He can remember the first song he wrote about her. He was 18 and he hadn’t seen her in a while, hadn’t been home in a while. He remembers he referenced her eyes a lot, and her smile, remembers the sleepless nights, ink stained hands and pages of words about her. His words about her. He remembers when he shut down, how he became everyone’s favourite bullet to dodge but she stood directly in front of the gunfire. He remembers everything when it came to her except not loving her, he could never remember not loving her.

They never seemed to get the timing right, both needed to love each other as best friends first. There always seemed to be someone else, call them practice runs, though they never made them feel like how they felt with each other. I guess they were just adding notches to their bed posts to fill the time. They knew, the other women he was with, they knew the only reason he was with them was because she was with someone else. They could tell because his eyes would always linger in her longer than they would on them and he knew it was wrong to string them along just to occupy the empty space in his bed, he just thought that maybe if he closed his eyes they’d feel like her but they never did. The men knew too, how she was only with them to take her mind off of him. They could tell because she’d always smile just that little bit brighter when she looked at him compared to when she’d look at them. Their hearts weren’t their own anymore, they had both placed theirs in the hands of the other a long time ago.

He remembers the first time he kissed her. How he could still feel her on his lips that night on the phone to his mum as he told her how he thinks he’s finally going to get the girl. It was the first time everything felt as though it was falling into place and he swears he’s going to tell her this time. He’s going to tell her how her laugh is his favourite sound, how he listens to her voice like her words are answers to questions he never knew he had and that he’s written things for her that have banned him from Eden. He’s going to tell her he’s in love with her. And she’s going to say it back. They’re finally going to get the timing right.

It’s been 3 years and they’re standing in their garden, everyone’s gone home and the sky is painted in stars, she’s still in her white dress and he’s got his dress shirt only buttoned up halfway. Neither of them have shoes on and her hair isn’t as carefully placed as it was a few hours before. A picture perfect scene that captures sight of the purest love. He’s got one hand on her waist and one cupping her jaw as they sway to the rhythm of their favourite song. His lips linger on the back of her ear as he whispers words of adoration for only her to hear

“Darling, you look perfect tonight.”

Soooo there’s no particular reason I made this, no follower goals reached or anything like that, I just felt like I needed to make an appreciation post for my wonderful mutuals so that’s exactly what I did! You should really make sure you’re following all these lovelies because they all have a special place in my heart!

italicized - you’re one of my favorites
bolded- I consider you a pal (and ily a lot)

@ashtonfightme @fratnaddy @hazzastylinson @rainbow-mug @imperfectlychic
@jimmytfallon @madeintheaf @butterflygunmovie @alwaysalarrie @modellou @artsylarry @louismodel @whenlouwas18 @iicflarrie @shipandcompass @losinghome @biofthetimes @pathetic-larrie @footielou @blougreen @the-lalbum @lourryalbums @nialltomlinson @chooseharry @pink0water @warmvinyl @californiasold @complementarytatts @ruffleshirts @itsnotreal @onehome @actionlou @nudeshaz @carinyet @louisthepixie @kinglarrie @harryfromplanetstyles @mylittlebirdlouis  @bus1pride @louisbigass @youfuckngloosah @mitamdemo @80synthpop @thinkingaboutlou @scrantonlou @legolou @tightropeofhope @stylishirish @the-pink-era @backtolouie @crazy-frizzle @the-only-believer @littlelouislegend @onabedofhomemademash @backtoyou-mp3 @celebratinglouis @noralhoran @petty-larrie @louisgirlire @harryisabean @harryden @signofthetimesmp3 @adoredlou @fvckmelarry @1dwhom @yourssincerelyloueh @tempolarriefix @kardemoomme @taketheroses @almightyroseharru @organicstunts @gottagetbtter @avocadolouie @harryzxstyles @kingofpoplouis @dunkirkpromosavedme @littleslou @adidasladlouist @rbbsbb @sortaversatile @audreil @aristotlmndoza @goldenlouie @bootsftvans @dottystyles @softhipspuffynips @goldenstyles @theirsecret @evexdeen @adidaskiwi @beanielarrie @babeharrie @larryiswhatilivefor @lousweaterpaws @larriez @hotcandydrippingonme @onlyangele @hzzs @pinkrockalbum @louisosoft @lostinlarryville @livelylou @oliviatracknine @ettheseus @dunkrkpromo @avenroger @place-of-you-and-me @eyes–wideopen @harry-es @moonsunhl @thegaynkle @1970harry @laureltatt @everrsincenewyork @estrelune @28tatt @stubbornlarrie @the-unwanted-losers @whiteshirtlou @cheshireflowers @louistheicon @thepinksuits @delicatelou @promisetweet @lwtalbum @sugarbabykink @rosegoldeyelids @wanderlustlou @xigenuinelythinkx @genlouenlybelieve @louiz @oiiilivia @garnetirwin @spacey-peach @thelouisdiaries @rosesharry @rainbowtomlinsons @nursedean @iamlouis @anchorliam @calsbish @gigglelou @mizpahes @onlyangelharold @haroldtwerkin @twoghostsau @constellarry @harrysmyhappyplace @styleandsin @windysalads @yourlookingatthesun @littleglorydays @thepainfulship @louieurl @thearmyofbees @almightytwink @kingofkiwis @ufookinloseh @novemberfourth @pejoris @hunkyniall @harrypleasse @gaypansies @aesthetic-stylesx @beauthxrry @harrygotstyles @2-ghosts @babeharoldstyles @lou-the-hedgehog @eversincelarry @enditffs @angelharry @youngandbeautifuhl @independentassbitch @mothtolou @kalelube @harryplease @styleslovely @flipflopslukey @pastelwifipayne @sofi21world @backtoharry @twoghosthes @cashtoncreed @shoulderkisses @24peachy @fucclukes @calumshood-ie @payperviewmemories @popunkash @rrivervixens @kindness-matters-most @2k17hs @adidasmodel @starwarsmccaffrey @wantanymukewiththatcake @angeltrance @cashton @pixibee @youfuckingloosah @sincerelyharry 


*if any of these people are problematic or if i forgot anyone let me know 

anonymous asked:

Why are you just now being called elizajane if you love it so much? Did you come up with it or is it your actual name?

It’s my actual name. 

So what happened is this. My nickname growing up was EJ, because my brother as a toddler couldn’t say my name but he loved me so much that he wanted to, so he came up with that nickname. I loved that nickname. But, as you can see, it is eerily close to other… sexual things.

When I was in high school, I dated a really obnoxious guy, but we broke up because of weird things that happened. He allowed his best friend to began sexually harrassing me, texing me from an unknown number for sex, and calling me “bj” and asking if I’d suck him off. I became afraid of this nickname. 

I asked people to start calling me Elizajane. They refused to do so. They said it was too long. They started calling me Eliza without my permission. I hated it, and fought for them to call me Elizajane. They called me dramatic, and made me out to be a cry baby. I felt so ashamed, I gave up. 

Then, I started getting really deep into fandoms, to the point where I was making friends, not just posting fic. I was afraid to be found writing gay porn on the internet, so I went by “Eliza.” I didn’t like it, but I was scared. 

This continued until now, almost seven years later. 

The reason I decided on revealing my real name, is because most of my family still call me “EJ”, my boyfriend calls me “Puppyjane” or “honey,” and my irl friend mostly calls me “EJ” as well. It was getting to the point where I forgot what my name actually was, and when my friend called me Elizajane, it suddenly hit me just how HAPPY that name made me. 

I didn’t want to be Eliza anymore. I wanted to be Elizajane. I wanted to take back the name that the bullies took from me when I was 14. I wanted to be ME again. 

I refuse to be afraid any more. 

Restricted. (Seungcheol Ficlet) [M]

So, it’s been a while hoes. 😁 this is gonna be hella short because i just felt like writing this for no reason, i just felt like it and i was wondering if you’d like for us to post short stuff like this?

Also, we are STILL on hiatus, i simply just wanted to post this to see whether or not it will receive good feedback so we know what to serve everyone once the blog is up and running again. 😁😊

-kate

word count: 544 words

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7

I’m gonna do this right now. On this post.

This is my favorite video of mine and at the same time, why it made me subscribe to your channel: Five Nights at Freddy’s 2

I subscribed to Mark because he didn’t feel like an entertainer, he felt like a friend to me. I feel emotions when I watch your videos because I can relate to it. Whatever game you’re playing, it just seems I’m watching a friend play a game. That is also the reason why I’m still here after almost 3 years.

I care because you’re the reason why I’m happy. I never felt this joy in my entire life until I discovered you. And I never regret clicking that like button and I will always, always be a part of your community. 

And last thing, it made me subscribe to you ‘cause I know how much fun you’re having. How much hard work you put in! It is your passion and I believed in you. I am proud of you, Mark. 

Kalagang #10

1x12 I Can’t Leave Her

Already final episode? Oh, wow. Well, here we are. Last Kalagang moments of season one. I had fun rewatching all of their scenes as well as analyzing the development of their beautiful relationship. And I can’t wait to write more about Kalagang moments in season two! Hope you guys enjoy season finale post.

Previously on Sense8, Wolfgang and Kala had their first kiss. But even after Kala admitted her feelings towards Wolfgang, he still went to see kill his uncle.

Original post [x] @willgorsksi

And so far, he’s doing fine…I should say, until he finds out – actually Will tells him – Sergei was wearing a bulletproof vest and more of his men show up to kill Wolfgang. There’s no place to run, he’s out of bullets…he begins to think ‘this is it’. Not surprisingly, Wolfgang thinks of only one person. Kala.

Original post [x] @kalagang

He visits her, instead of letting her visit him. I think Wolfgang didn’t want her to see or be in his violent world…even if nothing would actually hurt her. Wolfgang lets out a heavy sigh. He doesn’t want to say what he’s about to say. He is not sure if he could even look into her eyes when he tells her that he’s about to die.

Kala obviously senses his emotion. Fear also takes over her body.

Original post [x] @sensatesgifs

He’s almost panting when he looks at her and says he’s come to say goodbye. I think in that moment, Wolfgang was more scared of not being with Kala anymore than of dying.

The way Tina delivered that line was so on point. Kala is like ‘really? seriously? you couldn’t come up with less reckless plan than THIS? and you still decided to go to your uncle after what I did to stop you? I even let you kiss me!’

Wolfgang: How was I supposed to know he’d be wearing a bulletproof vest? Who wears a bulletproof vest in real life?

Original post [x] @fyeahmaxriemelt

One of the many things I love about these two is even in the most serious and life-threatening situations, they create this strange mood of romantic comedy. And I’m sure when Wolfgang said that line, most people were thinking ‘dude, you carry a rocket launcher in the back of your car. I mean, who has that in his car in real life?’ Hmm. LOL.

Kala: [What are you doing?] I’m not like Sun, I don’t know how to use my fists, but…that doesn’t mean I don’t know how to fight.

This is the moment when our little innocent Kala shows her badass side. I love that she took the courage to be in that dangerous and violent environment – places where she wouldn’t dare to go – for Wolfgang. To fight for him.

Original post [x] @stilesbanshee

And Wolfie is definitely turned on by badass-Kala. He’s thinking ‘I thought I knew the reasons of loving her, but nope, this woman is full of surprises and I’m starting to love her more.’

There is no doubt, no fear, no hesitation in her voice. Only the determination to save Wolfgang and love towards him.

Original post [x] @stevenrogered

*screaming*

Original post [x] @alyciadebnamcareys

I just wanted to put this GIF because it’s Wolfgang in the fire. The fire – more like an explosion – which was created by Kala. This image sort of made me think that this fire, symbolizing Kala, has protected Wolfgang. However, we soon find out that fire meant something else to Wolfgang in his past.

Original post [x] @reyskywalkker

Wolfgang reveals to Sergei that it was none other than Wolfgang himself who killed his father, Anton. Wolfgang strangled him to death, but what made Anton Bogdanow completely disappear from the world – from Wolfgang’s life was the fire. So, in a way, fire might have been something Wolfgang hated for it recalls the memories of that day. Maybe not. One thing for sure is that fire is the last memory Wolfgang has about his father.

But we all know that fire means something different to him now. It makes him the warmth of the sun he felt with Kala on the rooftop of Ganesha’s temple, a bonfire she walked around in her wedding, and the light inside of Kala that makes her shine and beautiful…but also reminds him that he is the darkness.

Wolfgang: [Oh, God. Why?] You know why. You always knew. And still, you did nothing. […] You said…your blood is in my blood. So is his.

Original post [x] @sense8gif

Here, we really get to see a monstrous side of Wolfgang. The monster that was created by his own father and himself. Feels no remorse. Heart filled with pain and rage. Only the darkness exists in him.

Wolfgang: My father was a monster. And so are you. And so am I.

Original post [x] @fyeahwolfiekala

When Wolfgang says ‘and so am I’ you can see the sadness has consumed him for a moment. It just shows how much he hates himself for who he is – the exhaustion and despair after God knows how many times he tried to redeem himself.

Original post [x] @sense8sgifs

Sadness immediately turns into anger as Wolfgang pulls the trigger. When Wolfgang shoots Sergei, to me it felt like he was thinking of someone. He was shooting as if the person sitting on that chair was Wolfgang himself.

When Wolfgang killed his father, he hoped this monster inside of him would go away. However, it didn’t happen. Instead, when he grew up Wolfgang realized he became just like his father. He is so desperate to get rid of his monster, but still can’t find a way. And I think that’s another reason why Wolfgang looks so furious because he knows no matter how many times he kills off monsters like Anton, Steiner, and Sergei, it won’t get rid of the monster inside of him. It would only make him more like them.

Wolfgang: That’s why you have to marry Rajan.

Wolfgang thinks she deserves happiness – something he cannot give her, at least that’s what he thinks. He believes he will always be that monster. The darkness that she’s afraid of (Kala said she couldn’t sleep with all the lights off in 1x07). He thinks he doesn’t deserve her.

Another reason why he tells her to marry Rajan is – Wolfgang has never experienced this kind of feeling to anyone until Kala. And as much as it makes him feel alive and different, he is also scared. He’s afraid he might get hurt by this unfamiliar emotion. (Max Riemelt also mentioned this in Facebook live session)

Moreover, after showing his monstrous side, Wolfgang knows for certain that Kala will never be able to look at him the same way as before. So Wolfgang decides to push her away first, because he thinks he won’t be able to stand her rejection.

Original post [x] @ladyofglencairn

But what Wolfgang didn’t know is that Kala’s feelings towards him are stronger and deeper than he imagined. Wolfgang may think she cried because of fear and disappointment; when in fact, Kala was actually crying for him because she felt his pain. If Kala was truly disappointed by Wolfgang’s monstrous side, then she’d have looked away. But Kala never takes her eyes off of him because she still sees something beautiful and good inside of him. She feels his love towards her as well as her love towards him.

Kala: [We have to wake her up] [How?] [I don’t know] I do. Set her down.

(@tidesandtowers​ thanks for pointing out this scene for me!) This is not Kala and Wolfgang’s interaction, but when Will tries to find a way to wake Riley up, Kala appears to help them. Kala seems she was still crying and trying to recover from what happened between Wolfgang and her – more likely the pain she shared with Wolfgang. She talks to Will in a quavering voice. This highlights how much Wolfgang means to her – how much his presence has grown in her heart.

Original post [x] @amanitacaplan

I thought it’d be nice to put the ending scene. Always gives me chills. Besides, even after he pushed her away, Wolfgang appears right next to Kala. What can I say? KALAGANG IS THE ENDGAME!

Why does the BIGBANG community feel so dead here on tumblr nowadays? Where’d you run off to, fam? I miss my dash being flooded with lots and lots of BB goodness…

Originally posted by leepandari

(pls forgive me, i’m not a photo editor. i just wanted ot7)

Hey, everyone! I recently hit 100 followers! I’ve had this blog since January and even though I had a rough start and I wanted to leave a few times, I’m very glad I pushed through. I wanted to save a follow forever for another milestone and just do a drabble game for this one but there are so many amazing blogs a wanted to thank. I really appreciate every single one of you guys. This blog has been a safe haven for me, and I can’t imagine how my life would be without it. I’ve felt much more loved on this blog in the short time I’ve had it than on my previous blog, which I had for 2 and half years before I left. Even though this blog may be considered ‘small’ to some people (not that it matters to me), I still feel as if I genuinely matter to all of you, and I can’t thank you enough. I will never be able to fully express my gratitude. I really do care about all of you. All the users that show up under my followers are my friends, and I care about each one of you so much. Thank you all so much for all that you’ve done for me. I’m beyond grateful.

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Crestwood Analysis: Sad Lavellans, Angry Lavellans, and Solas’s Cowardice

I wanted to write about the different break-up options in Crestwood and how, at least for me, the differences play out emotionally in the aftermath, based on whether you choose the Sad (“I love you”) or Angry (“Don’t do this to me”) options. I’ve never played or headcanoned the third and, honestly, one truly hopeful option before (“I believe in us”) and so have less to say about that, but I would be interested if anyone can offer their perspective per the Hopeful option, ie: such a generous response to such a cowardly act. My Lavellans have both been too brash and too young for that kind of immediate sense of perspective. Note that this is not an argument in favor of any one response, just my own personal reading of how emotional dynamics play out differently between Solas and Lavellan post-Crestwood, based on the different responses I’ve chosen in the past. Also, sorry for the length of this post. I tried to shorten it, but it just kept getting longer, so…yeah. I threw it all in. Reckless abandon!

I am not sure what the most popular option has been in Crestwood. There’s no way to know. For me, with my first Lavellan, I went full Sad. This is because it felt tragically romantic, like when Angel breaks up with Buffy in season three, or when Edward breaks up with Bella in New Moon. I am a sap and a masochist that way. But for whatever reason, I had a really hard time with this option, especially in the aftermath. It seemed strangely contradictory to me, that she could be so upset, so blindsided, so terrified of losing him, and yet he merely is apologizing for “distracting [her] from [her] duty.” At this point, duty distractions, to me, seemed irrelevant, or another matter entirely. Filling in the blanks here, ie: between the balcony kiss and this—this immense sadness on her part, plus his cold response to said sadness—was difficult for me.

Of course, it hurt like hell in the moment. Obviously. I made a Tumblr. But for whatever reason, afterward, I had a really hard time headcanoning this one, ie: resolving all the weird, dissonant emotional chords that seemed to be going on at once in the scene, and then reconciling them with what happens later on. If they are as in love as Lavellan’s reaction suggests, why did he think merely referring to himself as a “distraction” would be enough to definitively break things off? Is he seriously that cold? Maybe. Perhaps he has to force himself to be this cold simply in order to deal with the situation. Eep. Dark. Still, I thought she would have more questions, ie: Why are you being so cold? What are you talking about, my “duty,” you’ve never cared before? I also found it hard to envision their relationship after Crestwood. I mean, unless you play it otherwise, there’s a bit of time still before the final battle with Corypheus. How did she stay away from him? Did he have to turn her away again and again? She was just so hurt in Crestwood, so confused. How could she not at least try and understand? And after the final battle, how is she so composed, speaking to Solas calmly and with what seemed to be a great deal of perspective, or at least acceptance? Perhaps others could, but I couldn’t make sense of this.

Once I got to Trespasser with my first Lavellan, I then couldn’t reconcile her desperation in Crestwood with her casual demeanor in the beginning at the Winter Palace. It seemed like she would have spent the previous two years searching for Solas frantically, and then wondering if, perhaps, he might somehow be there, at the Exalted Council (like actually be there—not throwing Qunari through eluvians and baiting her with blood trails). She was too beholden in this playthrough, and I couldn’t figure out how she could be both the calm, cool Inquisitor joking with Varric and talking marriage with Cassandra, and also be Solas’s frantic ex-girlfriend at the same time. Then, in the end, that she didn’t immediately jump into his arms when she saw him for the first time in two years felt like a major flaw. I needed her to need him more, and I was getting none of it from the game. Partially, this is an issue of the writing, but also, because I’m sort of like this emotional canon purist (ie: emotional dimensions outside of the game must resolve as they do in the game—I need it to be real), it all just ended up feeling a little bit meh. So, naturally, I started over. From the beginning. New Lavellan. I needed to get it right.

Okay, so the other night, with my new Lavellan, who I’ve been playing amidst droves of fanfic and hours of headcanon daydreams, I realized in that moment, in Crestwood, that the only possible response to his cowardly behavior seemed to be incredulity and anger. After everything they’d been through? This is how he ends it? Unbelievable. Her aggressive, physical response—shoving him, yelling, calling him a “cold-hearted son of a bitch”—felt so true in the moment. I sort of lost my breath a little bit. For some reason, the level of cowardice in his behavior (and it is—it is cowardly) seems to be compounded (or negated) by her response. If she responds by begging him to stay, telling him she loves him, this lowers the effect of his cowardice in general, because all the focus is on her emotional response to his behavior rather than the behavior itself. The cowardice has little effect on her. She seems to care less about whether what he’s doing is cowardly. She cares only that it’s happening at all. This response seems based in an unconditional fear of losing him. But if she responds by aggressively pushing him, demanding that he tell her he doesn’t care (which he can’t do, and she knows it), essentially calling him out on his cowardice, this highlights the motive behind his action rather than just the action itself. This, to me, makes his default reasoning of “duty distraction” to feel like just a cover now, ie: the first thing he could think of to say in his moment of bumbling cowardice.

The dialogue choice for the angry response reads, “Don’t do this to me!” It is the one response where the focus is on her. It is also the only response in which Lavellan walks away from Solas. The other two responses are focused on him or them (“I love you”/”I believe in us”). In both of these options, Solas walks away from Lavellan. I am tempted to draw a connection back to my earlier claims in another piece about their sexual/emotional dynamic, ie: with an angry response, this is the only time that Lavellan can be seen pulling away or walking away from Solas. It is otherwise always the other way around.

When Solas is able to walk away in the end, it makes the entire affair seem colder, and much more in stone, even as if he’d prepared himself for the coming of this very moment. But in the angry break-up, he seems completely taken off guard, especially by her response, which is physical and bitter, ie: “Tell me you don’t care.” Another dare. What she sees: He is brave enough to break up with her, but not brave enough to tell her why? I like this Lavellan, because, like in previous scenes, she is sort of putting the ball in Solas’s court. In the Fade and on the balcony, however, this has reminded Solas that he holds the power, which empowers him to continue the exchange (ie: to kiss her). But here, in Crestwood, even with the ball in his court, Solas has no way of responding. He cannot tell her the truth, but he also cannot bring himself to lie about his feelings. All he can do is take her abuse, stand there, and apologize as she walks away. He has fully lost control now—finally, and it is because of this that he is forced to reckon with his cowardice. This was powerful for me. I also knew that “cold-hearted” comment bit him. Solas is much more of a Romantic Hero during this option—far more self-hating and emotionally distraught than he was in my initial playthrough.

Because when she’s pleading for him and telling him she loves him during the sad breakup, his response is to put up his hands, to ward her off coldly, to say “I can’t. I’m sorry,” and then just walk away, leaving her there. Again at his mercy. I think my Lavellan, this time around, was a little bit sick of being “at his mercy.” She wanted more. Plus, his reaction in the sad break-up, his behavior is so cold, and so is his ability to walk away: it makes him seem more secure in the fact, if not relieved, that it is finally over—even if he’s hurt, it is held back.

I also feel that, during the angry break up scenario, his decision to break up with her does actually feel sort of believably spontaneous and cowardly and regrettable. Like, he really was gonna tell her the truth about the whole Fen’Harel thing, but he chickened out, and then the vallaslin removal was like this great, unfixable mistake, and he just legitimately realized he had lost all control of his feelings, the situation, and the relationship at large. He cannot walk away. How could he? He has no idea what’s just happened. Solas is so rarely caught by true surprise. Especially after watching him just like, own the Iron Bull in a game of head-chess entirely in banter the other day, I’m not sure he knows how to deal with even one small, legitimate moment of spontaneous indecision. Certainly not a stalemate. Because you cannot plan ahead for those. And he is prideful, and a martyr, so when caught off guard, of course he defaults to the mission, and he bails on anything so unpredictable and unwieldy as love.

Oddly enough, I’d argue that Lavellan’s angry response forces Solas to actually confront the reality of their relationship, while a sad response immediately hardens him to the situation. To avoid her tears, he must effectively switch off his humanity. He backs off, on guard. However, he lets her anger in, because he feels he deserves it. This, to me, is a good thing. Any time you can get Solas to feel, that is a good thing.

Once she’s gone, I picture Solas just like, dropping to his knees, realizing what he’s done, and, based on her reaction, terrified that there will be no going back. In the sad break-up scene, it seems like he still has an out to change his mind—if he wants to. Her reaction leaves him in control. But in the angry break-up, she is in control in the aftermath. There may be no going back, no fixing this mistake. Fen’Harel is obsessed with fixing his own mistakes. So he disappears, takes two years to suppress his feelings for her, because he has no choice, and, whether mistaken or not, doubles down on the plans he abandoned her for in the first place. Then, when he sees her again, and she is still open to him and his redemption, even somewhat forgiving, despite a modicum of, not resignation, but reason, it’s all the more hurtful. He falls so easily back into old tropes in Trespasser when he calls her vhenan, suggesting that their relationship has permeated him subconsciously, that it won’t die easy, won’t die at all. Their reunion is powerful then as, in his own very familiar, noncommittal way, he comes back around at the end (as he always does), calls her his “love,” tells her he will never forget her, takes the anchor, and, per his duty (and his nature), leaves. Again. WHY, SOLAS?

The angry break-up sets Solas up a bit differently in the immediate aftermath as well, I think, at Skyhold, ie: he’s in the wrong, and he knows it. Meanwhile, Lavellan’s anger sets her up for all of these wild reactions and methods for coping, doing just about anything to get him the hell out of her head so she can, as she puts it in the scene, “move on.”  This is very much my own headcanon, but I picture her like, heading out with the Iron Bull to anger-slay some dragons the very next day. Maybe she’ll bring Solas, too, but on the condition that he is a “powerful rift mage” and that she needs his magic if she wants to succeed. She still loves him, but in her defeat, she, like him, has grown too proud to relent. Though it hurts her, she treats Solas as a tool, a means to an end, which, considering Solas’s motives for joining the Inquisition in the first place, is ironic. And hey, I’m just trying to build a story here. I like irony.

Of course, I am still a deep romantic, and so I know that all of this is just reactive. Lavellan still loves Solas, but she is actively upset with him, searching out a way to reconcile her anger at his inexplicable cowardice and her own (apparently) unconditional love for him. Their interactions at Skyhold, as I see them, are often extended and bitter on her part, as she, starving, will do anything to draw any sort of emotional response from him at all. He, meanwhile, shows only self-loathing, taking her abuse, while trying to search out her true feelings without showing his hand. He calls her “Inquisitor” out of guilt and deference and speaks only of their final fight. It is hard for him. She may not refer to him at all, trying to get a rise out of his “cold heart.” At times, she may be downright mean, but he believes he deserves it, so just like in Crestwood, he is defeated and hard-pressed to defend himself—

Lavellan: You really don’t let anybody see under that polite mask you wear, do you?

Solas: You saw more than most.

Then, by the time it’s the end of the game, and they defeat Coryphy-tit, and the orb is shattered, Lavellan’s expression, her composure, will make sense in ways it did not when I played the sad break-up. Solas confession then (”No matter what comes, I want you to know that what we had was real.”) almost reads like one more apology. It is quasi-closure. I mean, at least until you get to the end of Trespasser. After the sad break-up, I couldn’t understand her composure in this moment at the end of the main campaign. But somehow, the fact that she became angry provided her with an immediate outlet, catharsis, a way to process, and now, Lavellan can see that, no matter what, they’ve been through a great deal together, and in the end, being so angry seems foolish, even silly. Perspective begins to set in, making everything even sadder and more hopeless than it was before, but also setting up the next two years as a time in which Lavellan at least attempts to get over Solas (even if unsuccessfully), rather than spend so much time and energy searching for him.

Solas: I suspect you have questions.

I mean, you think?

The end of Trespasser is so very sad. Lost elf, come home. I haven’t gotten there yet in this playthrough, but I hope to fully understand her initial subdued response now. She had hardened herself for so long in her attempt to move on. But the more they talk about their relationship (”And so he did.”), the more she softens to him, lets him in again, remembers. Just as quickly as he falls into the old routine, so does she. At this point, the term vhenan is so loaded–a single utterance conjures a world of joyous and painful memories. He still loves her, and she loves him, but the complications are…dire. We shall see what happens.

Anyway, this is just one way to read the different Lavellan responses at Crestwood, and I would be interested in knowing how other people read their Lavellan’s response in the end. I love hearing how others have managed to reconcile their internal stories with the (often downright sparse but immensely tantalizing) material we get in the game.This is just mine.

Now scuse me while I go watch this and cry hysterically. <3

I Don’t Love You Anymore

“Just leave me alone Y/N!” the brown-eyed boy screams at me, shattering my heart into a million and one pieces as he jerks my hands off him. I know he’s been stressed lately, he’s been in the studio two or three days at a time; coming up with a new album has been hard on him, all the guys really. Shaking my head at his tone, he doesn’t really mean that he’s just upset, I crawl back over to him and massage his broad shoulders, giving a gentle kiss to the back of his neck. “Cal, baby what’s–

“Will you stop! I’m not in the mood” he says in a calmer but still forceful tone as he snatches his phone of the bedside table opening to scan through Instagram. “Baby you’re just stressed and you need to release” I whisper in his ear, “Take it out on me,” I say as I bite down on his ear. “Y/N, I don’t need to release. I need for you to leave me alone. Gosh, you’re so frickin’ needy!” he says as stands up and glares at me. “Well sorry for wanting to show some affection to my boyfriend,” I snap, “I spent so much into this night only for you to piss all on it! I swear sometimes Calum, I wonder if you even love me anymore,” I sob as I snatch the covers off of me and storm to the bathroom.

“I will not cry! I will not cry over his douchey attitude,” I repeat to myself looking at my reflection. This was supposed to be a good night, like I said, I knew he was stressed and I was gonna help or let him take it out on me, if ya know what I mean. I went all out for tonight too, I took off work to get my hair and nails done, went to Victoria Secret to buy that new lilac lingerie set he’d been hinting the past few weeks for me to get. Went to the grocery store to buy all the ingredients needed to make his favorite dinner and stopped by the liquor store to pick up a bottle of Tenuta Tignanello, our favorite wine. I lit the whole house with small vanilla candles and had John Mayer playing softly in the background. For sure, I thought, this will be the night to release the tension between us. However, that notion was quickly thrown out the window once he stormed in the house, spewing curses about today’s horrible studio session.

                                            EARLIER THAT NIGHT

I’m humming along to Your Body is a Wonderland while pouring the wine in glasses when I hear the door slam and the butterflies in my stomach flitter frantically. I yank down the ends of my bralette, ensuring my cleavage was well on display and run my fingers threw my y/c/h to tease the loose curls the hair dresser put in. I hear Calum mumble something as grab the glasses and walk closer to where he’s at. “Dang it, y/n! Why the hell are there frickin’ candles all over the place!” He screams causing me to jump and drop the glasses of wine onto the kitchen floor, that’s gonna leave a stain. “Frick,” I hurry and grab paper towels to clean up the red, sticky liquid. “Y/N!” he screams once again, making me abandon the floor and run to him as I go to see a mini fire beginning to grow on our coffee table. “Oh my goodness!” I scream, “How did this happen?” I yell as I run back to the kitchen to get some wet towels, “All I did was throw my keys on the table and it knocked over the stupid candle. Why are there candles everywhere?” he questions again in annoyance. Ignoring him, I run back to him and smack the wet towel against the table until the fire disappears and a sigh of relief washes over me. “What the frick y/n!” he shouts, “You could’ve set the house on frickin’ fire!” “I was just trying to do something nice for you Calum,” I mumble softly. He scoffs as he looks me up and down, “What are you even wearing?” he asks, his demeanor catching me offguard. Did he forget the countless texts of “Babe you should get this” accompanied with a picture of this set he sent me. “I-it’s the set you wanted me to get. You said you’d thought it’d look good on me,” I say softly, nervously wrapping my arms around my body. I hate when he makes me feel like this, weak.  “What are you doing, y/n?” he asks looking around the house.  “I–umm, I made dinner and thought we could have a night together, just the two of us” I quietly say, looking everywhere but him. “I’m not hungry” he says as he marches upstairs and shuts the door.

                                                  CURRENTLY

I hear two soft knocks and a soft voice mumble, “I’m sorry.” Of course he’s sorry. I throw some cold water on my face to stop the stinging from the back of my head spreading any further. A feeling of release washes over me as I give in and let the tears freely fall from y/s/c face. Gosh, I hate him sometimes! How can someone be the love of your life yet brings you unbearable pain. Deciding it wouldn’t help crying about it but the best option should be talk to him since that’s what adults do. I wipe the tears and walk out the room to find Calum nowhere to be found. “Cal?” I question as I walk down stairs looking all through the house to found him gone. I weakly laugh, of course he left, what else does he do? I question as I grab the bottle of wine and head back up to bed, the beautiful, now,  cold dinner I made still left untouched. I realize I’m crying again once the tears drop onto my freshly manicured toes as I weakly climb up the stairs. “What happened to us?” I cry out. Walking into the room, I set the wine bottle down as a take off the lingerie and throw on a t shirt of his on the floor. I climb into bed and my foot rubs against something, a piece of paper.

Y/N,

I’m writing this note because I don’t have the balls to say this to your face. The reason I’ve been acting like a douche these past few weeks is because, well, at first, I thought it was just stress but, for awhile now, I haven’t felt anything with you. Each kiss, touch, laugh and word we shared has felt dead to me. I’m sorry y/n, I really am but I just don’t love you anymore. Please, find it in your heart to forgive me.

Cal.


A/N: Hello beautiful people! This is my very first post! *screech* I wanted to start writing imagines because I thought there are never enough imagines, am I right? Plus, I reallly love to write and I’m constantly daydreaming about the boys, so why not write about it? So, tell me what ya’ll think, please message, ask, like, love and all that jazz! I’m thinking about making a part 2 but I kind of like the ending where its at, what ya’ll think? Requests are open :)

I Don’t Love You Anymore Pt. 2

Knock Knock

Originally posted by stewartsmarano


Pairing: Clay Jensen x Reader

Request: “Could you write a Clay x reader where the reader goes over to his house in the middle of the night? No real reason, just cuz.”

Words: 749

A/N: Another Clay imagine is up! I hope that you are enjoying all of my 13 reasons why imagines, I really hard to finish my pending list, wishing not to disappoint someone because I am so slow on posting them all. HAHAHA.
I hope you like this, even though it is just a simple one. Thank you so much.

- G. x


“Clay!” You knocked for several times on the glass window of his house as you jumped many times to reach and to see him watching the television in the living room. “Jensen!” The window was too high to reach and you honestly felt tired as you kept on jumping to be noticed.

“Wha… what the hell?” He stuttered as he walked towards the window with a corrugated forehead. You could see the scared expression in his face before he noticed that it was you, his best friend. “What are you doing here, (Y/N)?” You stopped jumping and you thanked him silently for that.

“Knock knock.” You knocked again, stretching out your arm to reach the glass, and he unlocked the closed window between the two of you. You then stayed still for a little bit to calm your heavy breathing.

“Who’s there?” He asked as he thought that you were about to tell him one of your bland jokes.

“It’s me, idiot!” You obviously answered, not even meaning it as a joke.

“It’s me, idiot who?” Clay raised his eyebrow as he was hesitating to answer the joke.

“Idiot you!” You slapped his arm playfully as you tiptoed in your shoes and you realized that he thought it was one of your jokes. You let out a soft giggle, so you didn’t risk waking anyone up, and he just shook his head because of it.

“You came here just for that bad joke?” He rolled his eyes while chuckling and he left the window, closing it fully, walking away to open the door instead. “Come here!”

“Coming!” You cheerfully said as you ran through the front door.

The neighbourhood was quiet and calm as the night took over the time. Everyone must have been sleeping, since all of the houses were dark. The light posts illuminated the whole street and everything seemed so peaceful as the cold breeze stung your smooth and warm skin.

“So? Did you come here for that bad joke?” Clay asked as he quietly shut the front door. You then headed to the living room and it revealed you that he was just watching some random stuffs, maybe he couldn’t sleep.

“Honestly?” You looked at him with a serious expression in your face. He sat back on the armchair across the window and searched the zapper under his seat, unbeknownst him that it was on the couch. “Dork!” You threw him the zapper and he laughed loudly when he realized what he was doing.

“Uh, yeah?” Clay awkwardly answered then as he changed the television channel, trying to find some good films, but he just stumbled on those porn channels, making him blush and clicked the zapper’s buttons faster than before.

“I came here for no reason.” You widely smiled and Clay gave you a confused and befuddled look as he raised his arms as if he was asking himself what the hell were you doing.

“Didn’t you have better things to do?” He threw you a red coloured cushion, obviously, it matched the colour of their couch, and it hit exactly your face.

“Not really.” You shrugged it off as you threw him the cushion back, but he perfectly dodged it. “I just want to piss you off now.”

“Idiot.” He stopped twiddling with the zapper and he finally found a decent film: Forrest Gump.

“Oh my God, I love this film.” You happily exclaimed as you properly sat on the couch, pulling Clay’s warm blanket from his armchair and you covered your body perfectly.

“Um, well?” He shot you a death glare, but then let out a giggle as he saw how cute you were with his dark coloured blanket. He looked at you with a sweet smile, but then quickly looked away.

“Shush!” You sassily said as you were so concentrated on watching the film.

“You must be thankful that you’re my best friend.” You heard him mumbling as he carelessly plopped himself down on the couch, covering his body with the blanket too.

“Yeah, thank you.” You smiled at him and then focused yourself on the television once again. He let out some soft giggles as he wrapped his right arm around your neck and you leant your head on his chest, watching concentratedly the film.

You went over his house without a real reason and you ended up watching a movie together, cuddled up on a soft couch and a warm blanket. In short, the definition of a perfect night.


Year of Loneliness

I live in a 2-bedroom apartment with a wonderful friend that puts up with my weirdness and respects my beliefs. I have lots of friends in my life who I see on a daily basis and even some I get to enjoy outside our workplace. My parents live across town and I speak to my other set of parents at least once a week, I’ve even gotten to see all of most of my siblings more than once within the past 2 months. The point of this being: I am not alone. My day is filled with faces that I love and am blessed to be around.


But it wasn’t like that this time last year.


I lived alone. I only saw a few people outside of work. I would try to see my parents as often as possible but it still wasn’t as frequent as it is now. Now many of you may have turned your emotional setting to pity after reading that but I implore you to hold off on that. Because looking back that year I spent alone in my ridiculously expensive 1-bedroom apartment was one of the best. In that year I felt so close to God and so near to His heart that every day, no matter how hard, had hope. The year was still a ‘normal’ one, don’t get me wrong, I had really great days and really suck days the same that I do now; but back then I felt so near to God because I had no one else to be near to.  That’s an amazing feeling!


And no I’m not saying that being around people is bad or that it’s damaged my relationship with God in anyway at all. We’ve simply moved on to a point in this walk where I get to be an example of God’s love for people, He is still with me always and I’m still learning of course. There are nights where I miss the balcony I would sit on where I would talk to God all alone. Yet He reminds me in those moments of yearning that He is still just as close to my heart regardless of how I feel.


The reason I felt the need to post this is because I see so many of my beloved brothers and sisters talk about how lonely they are, how they feel isolated, and they feel like there isn’t anyone out there for them. My friends, I know it’s hard, trust me those suck days I mentioned were like super suck; but I can also tell you with confidence that those moments can be the best moments in your life for your walk with God. It might take time and you might feel silly at first but genuinely I want you to try and just talk to Him in those moments where you’re all alone. Just talk. About your day. About your plans. About the things you’re afraid of. About the things you are excited for. About how lonely you feel.
Despite the moments of pain along the way, I can say with confidence that my ‘year of loneliness’ was one of the most amazing and impactful years of my life. I am so grateful to God for that time we spent together and I’m eternally grateful that He is still with me and has blessed me through the season to this one.

Hang in there, my dear friends. The seasons of loneliness aren’t nearly as lonely as you think because you’re never truly alone.

-31 Women (Nan)

I watched the Steven Bomb

So I watched the last four episodes of the upcoming Steven Bomb and I have to say, it’s actually pretty good. Let me go episode by episode of the Bomb past Lion 4 (which was pretty bad). 

Doug Out:

This is an example of a filler episode that’s actually good. People might think I’m anti filler because I made this post, but I’m not really anti filler as much as I’m anti boring episodes and this one wasn’t boring. It’s got good atmosphere, an entertaining story, some actual suspense, and gives character development to a character that didn’t have any before. You could say they retconned Doug’s personality a bit, before he seemed very snobby but now is a bit of a goof, but I’m fine with that. It’s a good thing that Connie’s parents aren’t as unlikable as they were in Fusion Cuisine. The episode also has a ending that will come into play later in the bomb. Though if I had one minor complaint about this episode, it’s that it pretends that Steven Universe has been exciting lately, which is pretty delusional. 

The Good Lars: 

This is definitely a filler episode, but I didn’t mind it as much as I thought I would. It told a decent slice of life episode that featured good character development for Lars and Sadie. One thing that I liked about the episode was that it wasn’t a Larsadie episode, it was Lars and Sadie episode. Though there was some Larsadie stuff like a line where it seems Lars is going to say he loves Sadie to which I went “Aw! The show thinks I give a crap. How cute.” This episode did probably benefit from bar lowering both by Season 4′s drop in quality and the previous Larsadie venture, but I would say it was decent. It at least felt like an old SU episode while many of the bad episodes of season 4 felt like they came from a different show. A show that didn’t care if it was entertaining and didn’t respect its audience. 

Are you My Dad/ I am My Mom: 

These two episodes are pretty good, not as good as some other big episodes like Jailbreak and Earthlings, but still pretty good. These episodes had a great mystery element to it, and pretty good payoff. There’s a reveal that I feel was brilliant. I unfortunately saw it coming because I saw somebody theorize it in a Tumblr post. For some reason, the person who posted about this was pissed off about it, but I completely disagree. I felt like the reveal was a very good use of continuity. The writing for the bomb overall is pretty strong. These episodes introduce two new gems, Aquamarine and Topaz. I do enjoy their personalities, well I enjoy Aquamarine personality since Topaz is just a voiceless henchgem. I was worried they were going to be Peridot and Jasper 2.0, but they’re really not. I wasn’t really the biggest fans of their designs at first, and I’m still not, but their designs did grow on me a little while watching these episodes. What makes these episodes worth it was the ending. I’m not spoiling anything, but it makes certain that Season 5 will at least be more interesting than Season 4. 

Overall I would say that Season 4 ended strong despite being the weakest season of Steven Universe. I’m glad I was able to see these episodes and I’m definitely going to make a Mellow Frames on Doug Out, Are you My Dad, and I am My Mom. I’m probably going to make a list of my least favorite to favorite episodes of Season 4 shortly after these episodes officially air. I will admit that the list will be mostly negative, but hey, that’s what Season 4 has been like. I do think the show will bounce back in Season 5. 

Open Letter To The Community

So recently, I’ve been seeing a lot of posts circulating of other members of the community saying things along the lines us “I’m not nearly as good looking as everyone else in the community” or “Compared to everyone else around here, I look ugly”.  I’ve also even had some people who have told me this directly in conversation, that they felt not good enough to be here, not attractive enough, or they just doubt themselves and feel intimidated to talk to people because of that.

Loves,

ALL of us are here for ONE reason, a SINGLE reason we all know and have in common.

We all like tickling.  

Whether it be sexual or not, whether you consider it a fetish, kink, or just an interest/love, we are all here because we all love the same thing.  So we are all basically a community of nerds who made blogs so we can reach out and connect with others who feel the same way!  No one is better than anyone else, there’s no popularity system happening, there’s no cliques, we are literally all just a bunch of geeks who wanted to find a place to express their love for this thing we all love.

This community NEEDS you, ALL of you!  We are filled with people of all shapes, sizes, colors, sexualities, personalities, races, religions, mental illnesses….the list is endless, but we are such a beautiful place of acceptance for all of those things I’ve listed, and more and thats literally one of my favorite things about this place.  No matter what you look like, no matter how annoying you might think you are, there’s always a friend or a group of friends here that you click with because we are all such an amazingly accepting crowd.  

This community would most certainly not be at all what it is without all of you guys, its members.  Because all of us are so different, it makes it so much easier and fun when all of us come together and connect with each other here.  The fact that you look different or act different than other blogs is perfect and so more than welcome, and you’re what makes this community such an incredible place to be in. 

So please my lovelies, stop self-deprecating because you may not feel good enough to be here, or as good as another blog, but you so ARE and I WANT you here because seeing all of your little reblogs, posts, likes, and stuff make me so happy.  You MORE than deserve to be here because you’re you, you’re beautiful, you ARE good enough, and most importantly you’re unique, which is what makes this community so amazing to be a part of.  I’m honestly so honored to be a part of this family with each and every one of you here.  

-Abs xoxo

.

jade.tailor: I realize I never post photos without makeup. Maybe subconsciously, maybe somewhat consciously… Throughout my life I never felt good enough. As most of us experience at one point or another. Often times because of our upbringing or what we experienced as children we start to believe that we are not enough as we are. I can tell you from my childhood (one of many reasons), I was made fun of quite a bit by many of the kids in my middle school. Because of that I never felt like I was enough just as I was. Always attempting to prove my worthiness or trying to “be perfect” so that I would be accepted by others. Over the years I’ve stopped trying to prove myself and simply just be ME. I’m not perfect. No one is. But that in and of itself is perfect. We are all made as these beautifully unique individuals. Perfectly imperfect beings. I hope this inspires you to take of your mask and allow your true self to shine through. #nomakeup #beyou #perfectlyimperfect

RANT POST

So obviously the newest chapter of Watashi ga Motete Dousunda was infuriating for most fans (including myself) for a variety of reasons but I don’t think it was so unrealistic (exaggerated definitely) of someone who has only understood love in the superficial sense.

Kae, from my understanding, has only seen Mutsumi as an addition to her “favorite characters” because of the actions he took (just as most people take to fictional characters because of their actions/personality). There was no real indication of it being much of anything else. YES she did choose Mutsumi over everyone else but that does not mean her decision was not superficial. If you notice - she flashes back to all the times he treated her kindly before she comes to an answer. She is acknowledging his actions and feeling empathetic towards them to an extent but acknowledgment =/= appreciating, understanding, caring and the other elements that are a part of love. Also it’s important to note that Kae didn’t have to sacrifice anything to be with Mutsumi while the rest of the cast all worked hard and were willing to sacrifice a lot just to be with her.

The superficial seems to be a huge topic in this series - being that most of the guys (and girl) started associating with her for superficial reasons but grew to genuinely like her for who she was over time. Ironically, she is still horribly superficial, selfish and ignorant herself and is probably the only remaining character that is such. I think it makes perfect sense that Junko would have the entire cast, especially Mutsumi (whose development involved speaking up for himself when he wants something or feels something) distance themselves from her somewhat. She desperately needs that development that each character received throughout the series. I actually think I would have been somewhat disappointed if the series ended with her and Mutsumi with everything being perfect because that lack of development was painfully noticeable.

Also, I’d just like to add, I absolutely love that the cast tried to warn her about her behaviour and did not try to shallowly sneak in and win her over. It’s a true testament to their development and I believe it takes a true friend to tell you when you’re wrong and not just blindly take your side to gain favor.