i just fart on things really

Real Things that I've Said to my Service Dog in the Past 72 Hours

Are you peeing on my leg? Yes. You just peed on my leg.

You don’t get a treat if you took it away from me and then brought it back. That’s not how this works.

Why are you sitting like that?

Please don’t lick my nostrils.

“Leave it” includes flies.

Good. I’m glad the fly gave you hiccups.

You do not need your own pillow.

Did you just fall off the bed?

Me talking about you does not mean that I was talking to you.

You cannot eat things off the ground just because you are “off duty”.

*I set something down*
Do not pick that up.
*Bucky brings it to me anyway*

I am blowing my nose not crying but thank you for the comfort anyway.

That went really well aside from you farting very loudly when the cashier complimented you.

I asked for your leash not shampoo but good effort.

septicuniverse  asked:

Did you draw that little banner for jack in turmoil because that's really good I didn't know you can draw like that it's awesome great job dude 💚👍🏻😊😍❤️😂

I did, haha, I dunno, I suddenly felt like drawing something and I’m fortunate enough to have a job with some freedom to just fart around a little sometimes! It wasn’t something I was asked to do, I just put it in, and then went “oh btw I added this” after I sent it over.. Fun little thing to do :P

2

UUUUUM I JUST HAD A BRAIN FART.

Topaz’ body is a prison- both literally and figuratively?

Her body is a prison for the humans, they fuse to hold them. It COULD also be making reference to the fact that she doesn’t talk or show any hesitance to do what she’s told. Topaz seems to be suffering in some sort of way. Both of them look emotionless and dead inside when Aquamarine says “do your thing” and they fuse. Maybe their bodies are literally prisons MENTALLY to them, maybe something is really wrong.

*SPOILER ALERT FOR “Stuck Together”*

The images leaked from the “Stuck Together” episode show the Topaz fusion crying. I don’t know what about, but something has distressed her so much that she cries? Clearly Topaz is an emotional gem, and I think her silence speaks a thousand words in a way. Can she even speak at all? What if she’s mute? That could be why her body is mentally a prison because she can’t express herself. This also kind of supports my theory that Topaz will turn on Aquamarine.

So in conclusion: Topaz’s body being a prison is double entendres, and Topaz is sad. Topaz needs love and care.

Gabriel Agreste is not a good person.

But god if he isn’t one of the most interestingly complex characters in this AU.

Let’s get one thing straight: Gabe is a horrible person. He’s cold, merciless, and when imbued with magic nothing short of murderous. He’s a monster. He deserves years of jail time far sooner than he deserves redemption. But. But. Everything he does, he does because he’s human. He’s grieving in all the wrong ways but he at the heart of it does it from good intentions. 

It’s just that the road to Hell is paved with those very same good intentions of his.

(I think the same things can be said of the canon version of him too, but here it’s a bit more opaque I think.)

Keep reading

I finished season 4 and i have feelings. Let’s do this.

I’m fresh off of season 4 so let me just kind of vocalise my opinions before I wander into discourse and have to reevaluate everything. Lets just do a pros and cons list.

Pros!

  • I think I had fun?
  • My boi Shiro is the black paladin again and I fully enjoy that (Though I have to wonder what refusing to let him fly was all about but we’ll get back to that.)
  • Pidge finding Matt was a really excellent episode. The writing and voice acting were top notch. Definitely the stand out episode.
  • Pidge in general this season is great! It was so fun to see her showing Matt around and being happy.
  • Matt is a fun addition. I like that the writers definitely have him and use him now, but he’s still separate. He doesn’t attend team voltron meetings. He’s not an honorary 6th paladin. He’s separate and I think that’s what the show needed. 
  • Fun alien designs as usual
  • I really love that Lotor’s generals… just fucking bounce on him? Like they could have done a bunch of agonising over “oh jeez, what should we do? I loved Narti, but can we betray Lotor?”. Thats so done and predictable, and it’s not how real people behave. He crossed a line and they’re out. I dig it.
  • Lance and Allura have some really nice moments.
  • Episode 4 “The Voltron Show” is such a fucking stupid and pointless episode… but damn if I didn’t laugh a lot. And I think with the breakneck speed this season moves, you need that episode to just laugh at voltron on ice and Jurassic Park references.
  • Once again, the fan theory that Lance is going to sacrifice himself and die/get hurt is disproven. Which is good. I generally hate that idea.
  • They kind of fucking mention that Allura can magic? Kind of? God guys we’re so close to referencing one of Allura’s abilities in the previous seasons. I can taste it. 
  • That little moment where Matt is like “Hunk, you’re a genius!” And Hunk’s just like “Bitch, I know it.”
  • Captain Oilia is a furry OC but I would die for her.
  • Hey! Female Galra! Neat!

Cons

  • Keeeeeeeeeeithjjhuerhwefoqfqofjewofpow!!
  • YOU COME HOME RIGHT NOW YOUNG MAN!
  • Seriously, i know he’s like finding himself and shit, but I … missed him?
  • I was reeeeaaalllly hoping that Matt and Shiro would be best bros? Like guys I just… I just so badly want SHiro to HAVE SOMONE. And I don’t mean romantically. Like as an equal. Just someone that he doesn’t have to keep a brave face on for, and that he can kind of turn to and admit “I’m responsible for these children and I can barely keep myself together. How the hell can I do this?”. I was really hoping Matt might be that for him, but as soon as Matt called him “Sir” I was just like “…..aw dammit.”. 
  • Fart jokes guys? Really? Seems insulting. And of course it’s towards Hunk.
  • THIS SEASON MOVES AT BREAK NECK SPEED
  • Allura and Lance’s moments were so nice, but I’m now starting to worry about Allurance being canon? Don’t get me wrong! That’s hardly the worst ship to become canon! When I first watched Voltron over a year ago, I totally thought Allura and Lance would become the thing, but…. Look basically guys I don’t want to be queerbaited. Allurance is not the worst AT ALL, but it’s not an lgbt relationship, so I’m skeptical about where that will come from. These writers have mentioned representation sooooooo…. where?
  • LOTOR YOU GET A REDEMPTION ARC WHEN YOU’VE FUCKING EARNED IT.
  • Did… anything happen? Like this is gonna sound really shitty but I mainly feel like what happened was: Voltron successfully took over a large chunk of the empire, found matt, Lotor’s outcast and he might be trying to come up with a temporary truce with voltron.
  • This wasn’t a character development season is all I’m saying. 
  • No addressing Shiro’s whole deal. Clone/sleeper agent theory on hiatus. But it just makes you wonder why the lion swap happened at all. 
  • Still no addressing Shiro and Keith’s relationship/backstory, Keith’s galra heritage, Lance’s homesickness and inferiority, ANYTHING ABOUT HUNK…

This was a fun, but a bit sloppy season. I’m getting a bit tired of getting more questions than answers though. Next season I would love to learn some character’s backstories and see some things addressed that were not here (i.e. How did Lotor come into existence? Does he know his mum is haggar? How’d he meet his generals? Allura has pink magic, can we please discuss.)

Supernatural, No-Homo-Style (You’re welcome, SPN writers)

Okay, listen. I’m not someone who tries to tell other people how to go on with their creative stuff, but this is just – an idea. So the thing is, I understand how terribly hard it can be to write a story without homoerotic undertones. They just – happen, you know. All these parallels and carefully crafted scenery to underline a certain subtext, man, just – I know that feel, bro. All my stories? Never supposed to be Destiel. Dean just comes barking in, screams “I’m queer, dude” and then I just – well, anyway. Not that Dean is queer, of course, why would you ever think that.

So what I want to do is: I want to offer you guys, SPN writers, directors, producers, you name it, a way to no-homo your episodes efficiently so no one can tell you that you want us to ship Destiel because that wouldn’t be true, right, right? And man, I know a lot about bro friendships, I watched The Wild Soccer Bunch when I was ten.

Because I’ve noticed that some people – without any indication in the subtext or even text whatsoever – started picking up extremely on the romantic undertones in Dean and Cas’ relationship specifically in the last two seasons. So I’ve looked into this plot and I just found a few teeny tiny things that were of course completely unintentional but could make some weird lunatics think that this is something the writers actually think of.

So let’s start, shall we? Very important in every bro™ relationship: don’t make the entire plot of a season rest onto the special bond between you and your bro. I know this is an easy mistake to make because let’s face it, Cas is awesome, but some people might read into this and think “Man, if he can resist his strange ‘love’ for Amara by looking at Cas, maybe that means he loves him?” and hahaha, what a crazy thought, right? So yeah, rookie mistake no. 1 but man, that can happen to everyone. Instead, maybe make him have concern for his bro but at the same time not be able to overcome his mind control because of his lo broness with Cas. It’s really easy and then the director doesn’t have to put some suggestive shots into the episode where Amara figures out how much these two bros bro with each other and uses that revelation against them!

Also, speaking of this? I know, heart imagery is great and when you only have a cast of male white dudes it gets hard to portray it without homoerotic undertones, but yeah, it’s still a bad idea to have the main villain hover over the heart of one bro and then get a magical connection to the other bro through this heart. I mean, I get it, keep your friends close and your bros closer, but some people might think that the heart imagery connects to the feeling of love and that would be ludicrous, right?  A good alternative would be to simply scratch this whole plot line. Maybe make Dean doodle some hearts while talking to Amara if you want heart imagery so much because hey, she’s a FEMALE and she’s RIGHT THERE so by every television standard they HAVE to copulate!

Next – the pining and caring for Cas. I mean, is that really necessary? Cas is a big boy. He can take care of himself. And Dean, you should really just listen to Sam when he says that Cas will be okay and you should make the smart choice instead of the heart choice (and there it is, the heart imagery again! I KNOW heart rhymes with smart – but here are a lot of others things that you could have used instead: fart, cart, bard, pop tart – you’re welcome to use them! Let Dean make a fart choice next, guaranteed no homo™ and also fart jokes are awesome and funny and original!)

Why not have Dean have a roll in the hay with Mildred? Man, that woman was badass! But having her insist that Dean was already pining for someone else and watch the sunrise together, an imagery that has been associated with Cas consistently, that just was plain bad writing. I get that you wanted to write you out of a corner because Mildred was coming onto Dean and that it wasn’t supposed to make us think of Cas at all but next time just so the full route and let Dean have his way with the ladies, he loves it because he’s a LADIES man and he loves the LADIES or the fellas I don’t judge wait what Dean shut up!

And all these talk about Cas and Cas and where is he and Cas and Caaaaaaas (shut up Lucifer)? It’s great talk, really, but maybe replace it with a significantly less gay word: BRO! Why care for Cas when Dean can care for his BRO?! There’s no reason against it! And if it’s not necessary for the plot, maybe don’t make Dean talk about his bro at all. You gain precious minutes that you can instead use for the brother bond you value so much! (What, you say, you want to end this co-dependency? DON’T! Then you may have Dean ready to enter a healthy relationship and man, people could think this relationship could be gay, urgh)

Next mistake: the scene in that barn? Don’t get me started. You started so good, SPN writers! You had Dean say a really bro-like thing, “don’t worry, I’ve had worse” - good on you, Dean, that was very manly and very good at ignoring the glaring (and oozing) problem right in front of you. But then of course someone had to turn it around and put this silly “I love you” in there and repeat it. Your script probably just fell into a printer and got copied twice so they thought “ah, heck, now we’ve got to say it twice and make it sound like the first one was specifically for Dean, and let’s throw some suggestive camera angles in there while we’re at it” so maybe next time, I don’t know, try to keep these rogue scripts in check. You don’t want anyone to think that Cas actually loves Dean and only Dean.

And also, I know, bros love bros and they love their quality time with each other, but still, bros don’t just leave the room when they talk to their bro and the phone and then sound suspiciously like they forced themselves to have a completely different conversation when they re-enter the room. And maybe, because you all just love the Sam-and-Dean-codepency have Sam talk, too! Let him interact with his bro! People could think that the fact that Sam has a completely different dynamic with Cas means that Dean’s love for Cas is more than just family and that’s obviously not true *cough* who would think that *cough* Lucifer maybe *cough* and every other villain on the show and a few friends too *cough*

… I’m sorry, I got something stuck in my throat. So anyway, let’s get to the next point: I LOVED that scene in 11x23 where Dean told Cas that they’re such BROS and Cas means so much to them as BROS and I really hoped that means we could have some BRO action in Season 12 but no! Somehow Cas still didn’t feel like he belonged because apparently being a BRO wasn’t enough for him? He still wanted to prove himself to Dean specifically with no talk about Sam? I know, guys, guys, I know you want drama in your show, we all know this, this is SPN, but next time, tone it down a notch. You may just want to have drama where Cas is part of the family as a BRO and everyone accepts that and he too and he doesn’t have to get PERSONAL GIFTS by Dean to maybe show him that he belongs and still not getting it because something is still missing -  because then people might think that this something missing is something absurd like LOVE and not in a platonic way.

Oh and the last thing: 12x23. Boy where do I start. I mean I loved that you had separated them the last episodes (because people may think that they would start to kiss or something like that if you left them alone for a few minutes) but was it really necessary that Dean just stopped functioning as soon as Cas died? He could have instead, I don’t know, have a few pimples that he needs to squeeze and that’s the reason why he couldn’t face Jack with Sam together. I get that this was all great foreshadowing because Sam and Jack do have a weird connection but really, don’t make the mistake to pair Dean off with Cas again and make them look like they share a special connection! Pimples, man, I tell you. They’re almost as original as fart jokes and very heterosexual, trust me, I never had them and I’m as queer as can get. 

So please, enjoy this free advice on how to no homo your episodes efficiently because just throwing in a few hook-ups with waitresses now and then just isn’t the FULL no homo experience™ because some weird people still think that Dean could be something like, I don’t know, bisexual, and we all know that bisexuality doesn’t exist and even if it did, Dean couldn’t possible come out at this age because that’s just unrealistic, amirite???

Thank you for listening.

anonymous asked:

the i'm not jealous of that rabbit or something like that drabble :)

🐰 → ❝I’m not jealous of a rabbit. I just think it’s funny how—❞


COUNT → 871

GENRE → fluff

PAIRING → jungkook | reader

WARNINGS → boob groping | explicit language


“Noori,” you began with a sigh, “why is there a rabbit on my bed?”

From her spot beside your bed, she rubbed her hand from the top of its head down its back, its ears twitching in delight. You gave a small smile at that. It was a little cute—you could admit that much—but there were strict rules in your dorm that there were no pets of any kind at all. And a rabbit was no exception.

“I found it outside the dumpster and I just couldn’t leave it there,” she answered with a frown, continuing to pet the gray rabbit.

“But what if it had a family? What if you took it away from its family?”

She paused, then looked up at you, horrified.

“I’m sure it’s fine!” you exclaimed, raising your hands to reassure her. “It’s here now, so there’s not much we can do about it.”

Slowly, you approached her and the rabbit, lowering yourself until you sat on your heels beside Noori. It didn’t seem to mind your presence all that much. It was so calm and chill for a rabbit. You hadn’t even owned a pet rabbit yourself or even met a person with a pet rabbit, but it seemed relaxed and at peace.

“It’s so cute…” you whispered, afraid to speak too loudly to scare it away.

Although, where would it even fucking go? Under your bed? Out the door the second you two left? Maybe it would find its family and that would be the end of that. Noori, however, seemed to already be very attached to it.

“Isn’t it? Can we keep it? I want to name it Leonar—”

Suddenly, your door swung open and the rabbit jumped, surprised. Noori quickly reacted and hugged it to her chest just as you glared at Jungkook over your shoulder. How did you know it was him before you even saw him? Let’s just say he had a certain smell—like moldy underpants and a cat’s farts.

“What the fuck? Is that a—”

“Shh!” the two of you said at the same time, then looked back at the rabbit.

As it seemed to calm down, Noori set it back on the bed, grabbing a nearby blanket and continuing to pet it. You stood up, slowly walking towards Jungkook until you were standing in your doorway.

“What do you want?”

“I’m great. What a nice thing for you to ask me.”

You ran your tongue over the front of your teeth. “Really. What do you want?”

“I just came to stop by your little cave to let you know my parents are coming tomorrow and they wanted to invite you with for some fucking reason.”

“You see, Jungkook… There are these things called phones. You have my number. Therefore, it is unnecessary for me to have to see your face in person.”

“But why would I do that when you’re such a joy to be around?”

You ground your teeth as he brushed past you, situating himself next to Noori. The rabbit immediately backed away from him, though, and he pulled back.

“Looks like somebody doesn’t like you,” you said with a grin. “I can relate.”

He rolled his eyes, looking over his shoulder at you before reaching out to touch the rabbit again. However, it only seemed to further back itself into a wall. With a bounce in your step, you situated yourself next to Noori and shoved his hand out of the way, gesturing for the rabbit to come towards you instead.

Surprisingly, it did.

Noori looked at you with a bright smile as it climbed into your arms. You reached down to scratch at its head, not sure how a rabbit liked to be pet. When you leant forward, your low-cut tank top must’ve given it an invitation to climb inside because the next thing you knew there was a rabbit on your boobs.

You took that moment to glance at Jungkook, his jaw hanging open. He couldn’t seem to tear his eyes away from the rabbit in your shirt and stood up. When he did, the rabbit quickly climbed out and huddled near the wall again. Glaring at Jungkook, your stare deepened when he suddenly grabbed your hand and dragged you out of your room, shutting the door behind you.

“What? What’s wrong?”

He didn’t say anything, just clenched his jaw.

“Are you…” You paused, trying not to smirk. “Are you jealous of a rabbit?”

“I’m not jealous of a rabbit,” he immediately said back. When he went to scratch at the back of his neck—the tell-tale sign that he was lying—he continued, “I just think it’s funny how—”

“Aha!” you shouted, smiling. “Jungkook, it’s a fucking rabbit.”

“Yeah but you never let me touch your boobs like that.”

“You have never asked to touch my boobs.”

“Can I touch your boobs?”

No.”

However, Jungkook being Jungkook, touched them anyway. You had to slap his hand away just as one of his hands travelled underneath your shirt to move one of your bra cups out of the way and squeeze.

“You will not grope me in the hallway.”

“Can I grope you in the storage closet?”

You hesitated. “Fine, but you have ten minutes.”

Full credit to that other Anon since I essentially ripped off the whole framework, but this was done with the intent of granting you guys’ wish so I hope you don’t mind.

I came across that posted ask just after finishing an assignment, and it seemed like a good wind-down idea so here you go! A geeft!

this is the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me

Okay so earlier today, I was thinking about that one scene in GGIL where Glanni pretty much sharts himself and I was just wondering…why did that even happen? Why was that scene needed? What made Magnus Scheving think “I need Glanni Glaepur to fucking shart his pants-” Like- WHY? 

…And then I remembered the farting sound effects that they used for Halla in Afram, and how they made fart jokes involving Jives in both plays and I’ve come to the conclusion that Magnus Scheving just really likes fart jokes. That’s literally the whole thing that’s literally it. And his actors just gotta deal with it. 

And this just furthers my theory that Magnus Scheving is a five-year-old trapped in the body of a grown man

Colin O’Donoghue and Lana Parilla Panel--OUAT Chicago 6/10/17

Originally posted by lanasfeather

[Note:  I made an audio recording of the Colin and Lana panel, the Colin panel, and the Rebecca Mader panel.  The sound quality isn’t at all good, so rather than post it somewhere, I decided to make a transcript.  These transcripts take a while to make, so it’ll probably be another day or two before I finish the Colin panel and the Bex panel.]

Lana:  Welcome to Chicago. [gestures to Colin] For us, to us.  Welcome Colin.

Colin:  Thanks for having me.  Welcome to Chicago.

Lana:  It’s such a pleasure, such an honor to have you here. How’s everyone doing? [crowd cheers]  I see a wicked witch and Robin…

Fans [from crowd]:  I love you! You’re gorgeous!

Lana:  Thank you so much!  Anything else?  [crowd laughs, cheers, starts cheering for Colin] Colin, you’re gorgeous.

Colin:  Thank you.  I know.

Fan [from crowd]: Your accent’s sexy!

Colin: [points at fan]  Thank you very much.  Oh, it’s cosplay day.

Lana:  It is!

Colin:  A lot of great costumes here today.

Lana:  I should have dressed up as you.

Colin:  I should have dressed up as you.

Lana:  So, I’m starting on this side. [To Colin] Am I blocking you?

Colin: No.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

How about a simply ridiculous prompt? Winteriron, with the first time Tony farted in front of his bf. And he's mortified- Bucky is his first boyfriend, who is more experienced with the dating scene but who is sticking with Tony for some reason?? And Tony is sure that he's screwed this up now, that Bucky will be beyond disgusted. Ofc Bucky is no such thing and reassures Tony (after laughing his ass off/some other reaction). XP

This work can be found on my Ao3 here. Guess who deviated from the prompt again!!! Who is surprised tho. With some side Stevetasha because apparently I ship that now. Watch out for under the cut!


“When did Natasha start farting in front of you,” Bucky asked, frowning, as he fiddled with Steve’s oil pastels.

Steve slapped his hand away, setting down a red pastel and grabbing a gray one instead. “Stop it. I have those in the order I want.” He turned back to his easel. “And Natasha doesn’t fart in front of me.”

Bucky stared at him in disbelief. “…You’ve lived together for three years.”

“I’m not even sure she poops.”

“What the fuck, Steve.” Bucky turned as the door to Steve’s apartment opened. “Natasha, you poop.”

Natasha paused in the act of pulling one of her ballet flats off, still halfway through the door. She instead chose to stare at him silently in a mixture of disbelief and offense. Bucky could admit that it was not exactly unwarranted.

“Steve wasn’t sure.”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Hi I'm sorry to ruin the fun but like every artist changes lyrics when in Amsterdam just to fit the word in cause it's Amsterdam. it has been done over a billion times and I really don't think it has anything to do with Louis' lyric, sad enough :(

*extremely loud fart noises*

Super!Mingyu

A/N: Hi guys~ This is my first AU! This was inspired by posts by other amazing writers and prompts so I decided to make a bunch of them. This one is a mash between Best Friend!AU and Super!AU and is quite long so buckle up! Be sure to be on the lookout for upcoming Super!Seventeen posts and thank you for reading! Enjoy! :D

P.S. Many fart jokes. Mentions of gummy bears. 

Originally posted by waejin


  •  lmao ok where do we even start with this guy
  • You’ve basically known Mingyu from kindergarten
  • He’s a pretty low key kid tbh, you never would’ve thought he’s a super
  • So the story starts when one day, in kindergarten, in the middle of the finger painting class, you farted ya it’s gross, get over it. Kids only eat, sleep poop and cry while farting inbetween.
  • So you’re kind of the silent-killer type of farter ok aka no sound but deadly
  • There’s another kid in class who’s infamous for having farting episodes 
  • So the whole class plus the teacher was like “ugh not again Kevin wstg we have enough of ur sh**” and are accusing him of this crime poor Kevin
  • Nobody suspected it was you (‘sorry Kevin’)
  • B U T  T H E N
  • You feel a tap on your shoulder and turned around to see this one kid with a bad haircut and trail of snot on his face
  • And you can’t help but zone in until he said
  • “I know it’s you”
  • Lol you’re f***ed.
  • Your know you gotta do something before he reports you to the teacher and you can’t have your entire kindergarten career and reputation just crumble into dust over a fart 
  • So what did you do?
  • “I’ll share my gummy bears with you but you will n e v e r tell a soul”
  • “Ok" 
  • Well that was easy
  • Anyways
  • From that day on Snotty aka Kim Mingyu follows you around like a lost puppy and sits with you during snack time for the sake of gummy bears kid knows his priorities
  • Everytime you won’t share your candies with him, he blackmails you by threatening to tell the teacher that it was you who farted that One Faithful Day
  • You kinda regretted it now that you have to sacrifice your gummy bears but h e y, better than getting your reputation ruined and get called Ms. Fartsfor the rest of kindergarten amirite?
  • So fast forward to elementary school
  • Surprise surprise you’re going to the same school as Mingyu 
  • He still follows you around btw
  • Also, you outgrew him so you call him Shorty now instead of Snotty
  • “How’s the air down there, Shorty?”
  • “Walk in traffic, Y/N”
  • Still asks for gummy bears during lunch period
  • Tbh it’s getting annoying at this point bc whenever you whip up your lunch bag he’d go nuts
  • "Is that spaghetti I smell?”
  • “Bring your own lunch, Mingyu.”
  • But then it starts to happen every time
  • He’ll know what you bring for lunch even before you unbox it
  • You’re getting suspicious
  • Is he half dog or something? How does he even know?
  • And then things get weirder
  • So basically Mingyu becomes the class guard aka that kid that stands in front of the classroom when there’s no teacher to inform the class when the teacher is coming
  • People starts complaining because Mingyu would come in and be like "The teacher’s coming ! !” but there’s nobody in the hallway?? so Mingyu pls explain???
  • “No I swear! She’s coming!!!”
  • Ofc nobody believed him and the class was in utter chaos when the teacher finally came in
  • “Mingyu, how did you know?”
  • “I heard her walking" 
  • And you’re like "lol what”
  • Anyways
  • He also becomes that annoying kid in class 
  • He’ll say that the class is too hot/too cold when it’s totally fine?? 
  • And when a teacher raises their voice he’d cover his ears
  • Also there was a time during a math test you and thought that you were going to ace the test because you’re top in class at least in elementary school if you’re bad at it lmao but surprise surprise Mingyu aced it too
  • But later during the day he comes up to you and apologized and said that he copied your paper
  • And you’re like ???? 
  • “Mingyu you sit two seats behind me how is that even possible???”
  •  He’ll be the first to know when it’s pizza day (“I can smell the pizza lol”)
  • But brings his own lunch to school
  • Claims that the cafeteria food smells and tastes weird
  • he never eats the food from school bc he claims that it smells weird and because he’s a picky eater
  • But basically Mingyu is physically hypersensitive to everything and people think he’s just whiny and annoying so the only friend he got is you
  • So you kinda took pity in him and you started to enjoy his company anyways so you let him hang around
  •  As long as he has his hand sanitizer with him at all times
  •  Fast fast forward to middle school 
  • Yayy time for puberty and hormones! fun fun fun 
  • Except it isn’t fun
  • Puberty is as fun for supers as it is for normal teenagers
  • It’s terrible enough to suddenly have a bazillion of zits appearing on your formerly-smooth face
  • But the fact that Shorty had a major growth spurt over the summer and is basically a f***ing tree now 
  • “Who’s short now, Y/N?”
  • And brags about it every time he has the chance
  • It’s also around this time that Mingyu has been acting even stranger
  • He’s easily distracted by a background noise, even if others don’t seem to hear it
  • He’d jump right out of his seat whenever the bell rings or any loud noises really 
  • At one point, a teacher got so angry and started shouting and when you looked at Mingyu he’s cowering in his seat with his hands low key on his ears, wincing every time the teacher raised their voice
  • He also becomes more secluded
  • Leaves the classes right after the bell rings, decided to take his lunch to a more quieter place under a tree at the school yard, avoids group projects..
  • You’re really concerned for him although you’re a bit hurt that he seemed like he’s keeping something from you
  • So you decided to ask him one day
  • “Mingyu are you ok? Is there something you’re not telling me?”
  • “Hahaha w-what makes u say that" 
  • You gave him a pointed look and it’s scary and he got reminded that time during elementary school you bit Sarah in the arm for cutting the queue
  • If that’s what ppl get for cutting your queue then what would happen if you find out that he’s different
  • He’s scared that the only person he’s been friends with for years would abandon him when they finally realize that he’s a freak
  • At that point of time, he just wishes that he could be like the other kids
  • But he also remembers that you’ve been there for him after all these times
  • You (kinda) tolerated all the times he sneezed in your hair 
  • “One more time, Mingyu and I will cut you.”
  • And the times he broke your toys after not realizing his own strength 
  • Also that dark time during elementary school when Danielle and her group of friends verbally bullied him for being “weird” and “different”
  • You stood up to them for him
  • You got yourself suspended and your parents called for punching the bullies in the face
  • That night you came to his house with a bag full of gummy bears and both of your favorite movies and you guys just hung out in his room
  • That when you said “Mingyu, I know you can’t even hurt a fly so if you need me to punch someone in the face I will”
  • Wow when did you become such a violent kid
  • But he knows it’s just your way of saying “I’ll always be there if you need me”
  • And honestly, you’re already a knight in shining armor to him the second you broke Danielle Davis’s nose
  • So he decided to tell you
  • How he knows what you’ll have for lunch
  • Why he’s so distracted all the time
  • And why he’s such a sensitive kid
  • He has heightened senses
  • *silence ensues*
  • He can’t help but starts to sweat as you stare at him, unblinkingly 
  • He wanted to strangle you, to force you to talk, to just say something
  • And then you do
  • “Wait ok so in kindergarten, you knew it was me who farted because of your super senses?”
  • lol. ded.
  • He just looked at you disappointedly “Seriously, Y/N, that’s the first thing that pops into your mind?”
  • “Well I’m sorry I can’t help it. But really can you really tell who farts in class. Also I’m really sorry for you, dude, smelling farts in HD must’ve suck.”
  • Ok but you’re kinda offended and sad why he kept it away from you for such a long time but soon realizes that people are judgmental jerks who’d just label Mingyu as an outcast if they find out
  • But basically, Mingyu is super duper relieved that you’re totally cool with it and you guys moved on from it
  • Fast forward to high school
  • *Achievement Unlocked: You got an S/O*
  • It’s not Mingyu ok
  • You met your S/O the first day of high school
  • They’re really sweet and caring and overall a nice person
  • Mingyu was more skeptical and protective when you first started to date but took the backseat when he realized that you can take care of yourself (lol remember Sarah and Danielle?)
  • Cheers you on your relationship and becomes your confidante and go-to person to talk about your relationship
  • He doesn’t mind at all.
  • He’s just happy that you’re happy what a cinnamon roll ;A;
  • Until one day he saw your s/o at the mall, hanging out with some girl he doesn’t recognize
  • They seemed pretty close and their arm would ever so often casually hangs on the girl’s shoulder
  • Mingyu’s general perception of your s/o has been good so far so although he was kinda surprised to see them hanging out with a girl that’s not you, he just thought that she might be their close friend or a family member or something so he brushed it off
  • He checked with his superhuman hearing and it’s not like they’re talking about anything suspicious or anything
  • But Mingyu being Mingyu, he was curious and wanted to look out over you
  • So he figured, if your s/o was up to no good, he’d have to find out himself
  • So he began to stalk investigate your s/o
  • You kinda picked up and would jokingly said “Don’t you dare steal them from me” and he’ll be like “No, no its not like that!” (lmao also he wouldn’t dare ofc)
  • But then Mingyu found out that your s/o has in fact, been cheating behind your back with a girl from school
  • He’s so surprised and more importantly, enraged that they would even do that to you
  • What have you ever done to deserve such trash of an s/o??? You deserved to be served and taken care of like royalty
  • That evening he went to your house to break the news to you
  • “Y/N, I have something to tell you”
  • You don’t believe him. You don’t want to believe him.
  • Your s/o has been such a caring and thoughtful person. They wouldn’t do that to you right?? 
  • So you do what you thought was right.
  • You got angry and told Mingyu that he was just being jealous, that he’s just mad that you now hang out with someone else. You told him to make some friends so he can get over it.
  • Mingyu got even angrier over the fact that you chose to defend your s/o and is hurt that you wouldn’t believe him, your best friend
  • But at that exact moment he also had an epiphany
  • He was jealous
  • He was sad that you now have someone else to hang out with
  • He was sad over the fact that you might drift away after all these years
  • He also realized that he cares so much about you
  • So so much that maybe it’s not the friendly kind of caring anymore
  • He realized that after all this time, he might be in love with his best friend
  • But he’s so angry so he decided to storm off and have you find out yourself, knowing how stubborn you can be
  • You don’t talk for the next few weeks 
  • He decided to avoid you completely and would change seats if you’re in the same class as him. He wouldn’t even spare you a glance in the hallways
  • You sit alone at lunch, with nobody to eat your gummy bears
  • This is the first time you guys had a fight this big
  • One day, during class, you decided you had enough and you made a mad dash out of the classroom to find Mingyu and tell him you were sorry (Teacher: kids these days smh.)
  • Otw there, you passed the janitor’s closet and heard some noise
  • You decided to be a snitch and took a peek
  • And there they were, your s/o and a girl, making out in the small cramped space, unaware that you’re watching
  • At that moment, all you can feel is your heartbreaking
  • You feel tears well up in your eyes, your body grows rigid and cold
  • You felt so so betrayed and lost that you don’t even have the energy to barge up to them and beat them yourselves
  • So you took a detour to the nurse’s office, your mission long forgotten
  • You laid down on a cot for a good half-an-hour before you heard the curtain being opened and at first you thought it was the nurse who decided to kick you out but then you felt a large hand brushing the top of your head ever so gently
  • And by God, nobody was allowed to do that to you except for
  • “Y//N, I came as soon as class is over, are you feeling ok?”
  • You looked up and there he was, looking at you with concern and yet with the softest face
  • And it felt so sincere that you broke down completely in front of him
  • He just held you as you cried into his shirt, blabbering nonsense and being a snotty mess
  • When you were much better, you told him what happened
  • And then he had a look in his eyes
  • He kissed your forehead and just left 
  • You’re confused because Mingyu?? what are you doing m8???
  • You didn’t heard from him until later in the afternoon
  • He got suspended
  • For punching your s/o smack in the face
  • You didn’t know what to do. Should you thank him??? be concerned???
  • Since when did he become so violent?
  • lmao he learned from you
  • But later in the evening, you came to his house, a bag of gummy bears in one hand and your favorite movies in the other
  • Neither of you said anything at first. You didn’t need to.
  • You both just climbed up his bed and started eating and watching the movies
  • Halfway through the movie, you glanced up at him
  • “Thank you”
  • He didn’t take his eyes off the screen “He deserved it. Should’ve know what was coming for him.”
  • You’re not satisfied so you sat up and took his face in your hands and his eyes finally finally met yours
  • And oh how lovely you looked in you sweatpants and oversized t-shirt, and yeah looking up kinda hurts his eyes because of the light but it’s casting a soft halo around you and when he met your gaze, it’s fierce and determined
  • Your eyes are still a bit red and puffy from all the crying earlier but to him, at this very moment, you're perfect.
  • You said “I’m sorry for not listening to you. I’m sorry for being such a jerk. I’m sorry for saying those hurtful things to you-”
  • But he cuts you off, his lips ascending onto yours into slow searing kiss
  • You lost your train of thoughts and while you thought that he’s the one with the heightened senses here, at that very moment it’s as if you had it too
  • Everything felt so warm and you don’t even know whether it’s from the close proximity, your body heat or the room. Your heart went overdrive and you’re scared that he might hear it He totally could
  • But most of all, it felt right
  • You know maybe you should’ve been aghast or the very least, disgusted, that you’re actually kissing your own best friend but it doesn’t feel like that with Mingyu
  • You can feel all his emotions in that one kiss and nothing ever felt so sincere and so warm
  • You didn’t know but at that very moment, Mingyu was experiencing the exact things, although everything is thrice more intense
  • After what felt like an eternity, he finally pulled away and there you are, gazing into each others eyes, breathing fast, cheeks flushed
  • “I’m sorry I did that.. and no! before you kill me, you’re just the most beautiful person I’ve ever met and you deserve someone who can see that and appreciate you and take care of you with all his hea-” he said before you pulled him up for another kiss
  • “I love you, too, you giant idiot.”
  • And at that very moment, you realize that after all, you might been in love with him
  • You remembered the kid with the weird haircut and snotty nose who caught you farting back in kindergarten and thought: “Who would’ve thought?
School Bullies

This past summer I went on a school trip fro two weeks, for a baseball tournament. I was really excited to be going with all of my friends, It was going to be so much fun, but things didn’t work out the way I had planned. On the bus ride to the hotel our coach told us that we will be partnered up alphabetically to share rooms with. This sucked because my two best friends ended up being paired together while I was stuck with a senior named Ben. Ben stood at around five foot ten inches and was extremely muscular. He seemed like a cool guy, although I had never really talked to him much.ben was known for two things by the team, his non stop sweating armpits, and his humongous ass. I mean his ass was crazy big, no matter what pants he wore it was always breaking their limit. When we got to the hotel our coach told us to head up to our rooms unpack, meet for dinner at seven thirty and then head straight to bed due to an early practice in the morning. I grabbed my suitcase and stated toward the stairs when Ben came up from behind me and slapped my ass really hard. “Get ready for a whole lot of fun dude” he said as he strode past me. Once I arrived in the room after lugging my suitcase up four flights of stairs Ben was already there unpacking in only a loose fitting pair of plaid boxers. “ hey man” I stated awkwardly as I slowly closed the door behind myself. He glanced up at me with a devilish smirk and answered “sup bro”.
For the next hour or so we both unpacked quietly until he picked up his phone and went to our bathroom. While he was going I picked up my phone a decided to let my parents know that all was going well, I texted them and while I was waited for a reply I did not hear Ben come out of the bathroom, until all of a sudden I look up from my phone and his huge ass is right in front of my face. Before I even have the chance to react he rips a massive fart right in my face. The smell instantly hits me and I begin to gag over and over agiain. Ben doubles over with laughter, two smaller farts escape his ass while he’s laughing. “What the hell man!” I shout as he still laughs on the ground. “That was so disgusting!”. I just stare at Ben with shock until he finally controls himself. He stands up and says between laughter" dude there is so much more where that came from, just wait til after dinner.“ I am so shocked by what he just said, but I dont want him to think I’m such a stiff so I decide to play along . I force myself to laugh and then say ” ha ha very funny" to which he replies so seriously “ no dude I’m serious just wait until after I get some food in my system.” After he says that he pulls in a pair of gym shorts and walks out of the room with his shirt and shoes in his hand.All throughout dinner I was so nervous, the food was served buffet style and while I was getting my food Ben walks past me and says “mmhhhh, they’ve got beans” After I got my food I sat with my friends and could not help myself but to glance over a Ben every two seconds. He had a huge pile of beans on his plate, some broccoli, two slices of pizza, and a can of coke. I knew he had gotten all of those things intentionally. Once dinner was over our coach had a quick meeting with the entire team. After the meeting was over I lagged behind to talk to my coach. I asked him if u could hang out in a friends room for a little while, but he immediately dismissed me and told me to go to bed. I trudged up the stairs only thinking of what was awaiting me. When I entered the room Ben was sitting on his bed once again only wearing the loose fitting pair of boxers. “ what took you so long dude, I almost had to start Farting without you” he stated . I replied to him very quickly “ come on please, this is ridiculous , why do you need to do this?” Ben got up from his bed and walked towards me while saying, “I don’t need to, it’s just fun, trust me you’ll love it too.” I started to back away from him, but he grabbed me and wrestled me onto my bed. I tried to fight him off but he was much stringer then me, before I knew it my face was under his ass, with my nose directly in his butt. I struggled beneath him and yelled for him to get off , but he just looked at me smirked and said “ just relax , and enjoy yourself” after saying that he immediately sat his boxer clad ass on my face and ripped one of the most obnoxious farts I’ e ever heard BRRRPHTTTTT! The fart smelt like pure ass, I had never smelt something so bad in my life. “ ohhh ya, that was a good one right? I bet you’re loving it down there” Ben shouted so I could hear him Beneath his ass. Ben farted repeatedly on my face and kept commenting things like “ I know you loved that one” “man you’re so lucky you get to smell MY farts” “ you should really be thanking me for this”.
He had to have been sitting on my face for about a half an hour when he finally sat up. I took the biggest breath of fresh air once he sat up, I was so happy to be free, but I was far from free. “Ya know dude, I think that’s enough of this” he said in a very pretentious way, I was about to say yessss please get up, when he cut me off by saying “ yea that’s enough of that, now it’s time to go bare ass”. “ noo dude please I’ll do anything, just please don’t fart on me bare assed, I won’t be able to take it”. I begged him. He started to laugh at me again “ oh man hell no, you are going to take it and enjoy it” he stated, and with that his pulled back his plaid boxers revealing his gigantic ass. It was so big and hairy, and most defiantly smelly. I tried to pull my face away from his ass, but no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t stop him. Ben slowly brought his bare ass the my face and sat down. The hairs on his butt tickled my face as I shot right into his butt crack, I think my nose was right in his butt hole. For the next ten minutes Ben farted almost non stop up my nose, the smells were horrible. Ranging from rotten eggs to shit. Eventually he finally ran out. Once he did he stood up, pulled up his boxers looked down at my shit stained face and said “ that was pretty awesome right, just wait til after practice tomorrow, you’re going to love my ass once it’s sweaty. ” after saying that he jumped off my bed and slid underneath his covers. I tried to confront him, but all he told me was that we’ll talk about it in the morning, but looking back on it now I wish I never talked to him about it in the morning, because what happened next was all my fault. The next morning when when I woke up Ben had already left the room. I did not want to confront him during breakfast so I figured I’d wait until after practice. Practice went well, and afterward our coach took the entire team to go watch a game. During the game Ben came over and sat next to me “ oh dude nothing can prepare you for tonight” he said in a menacing voice. By this point I was pissed so I started to fight back “no Ben you are not going to do that again or else!” I yelled back. Ben seemed shocked that I was defending myself, but he quickly gathered himself, and told me “ how about we make a bet”. “What kind of bet?” I answered. “ we each pick a team and whoever’s team wins that person gets what they want. So if your team wins I will leave you alone, but if my team wins you have to do whatever I say for the rest of the trip” . This was a huge gamble I could either get him to leave me alone for the rest of the trip or end up being his personal slave for the rest of the trip. Now I wish I decided not to make a bet with him, but I did and I lost. After my team lost Ben was overjoyed and I was sick to my stomach. The whole bus ride back to the hotel I knew what was coming for me. Once we arrived back at the hotel everyone was saying how badly they needed to take a shower because they were still so sweaty from practice, but I knew that Ben did not have any plans to shower, he was going to use every ounce of his stink to torture me. As soon as Ben and I entered our room he tackled me down to my bed and gave me a huge wedgie. “alright slave boi, how about we start our fun with you give me a foot massage.” Ben released my underwear and shoved me off the bed, he hung his feet off the bed and I slowly started uniting his cleats . I pulled them off one by one only for my nose to be assaulted by a horde of stink. “Smells nice right bitch?” I started to massage his feet when he repeated himself, this time sounding more like a command “smells nice right bitch.” He just stared at me until I realized what he wanted me to do “ yes Ben your feet smell really nice.” I stated reluctantly. “Show me that you like the way they smell” he said. So I brought his left foot to my face and inhaled deeply. “God boy” he stated in a joyous tone as if I were a dog. After about ten minutes of giving him a foot massage he had another command for me, “take of my socks with your teeth”. I did as he said pulling each sock off with my teeth until both of his disgusting feet were in front of me. “Now that you were so kinda day gave me a foot massage, my feet want to repay the favor, they are going to give you a face massage.“ With that Ben made me lie face up on the floor, all I could do was watch as he brought his two giant feet to my face. Rubbing them back and forth across my face, they slid up and down because of how sweaty they were. The smell was horrendous, but far worse was coming. "Okay bro, I think you gotten enough love from my feet today, how about you come give my nice hairy pits some attention. ” Ben pulled of his shirts and lifted his arms above his head exposing his super sweaty, smelly, hairy pits. Ben leaned his face into one and took a deep breath In Through his nose. “Mmmmm, you’re gonna love these.” He said acting as if his pits smelled remotely good. “Come to daddy” he stated as he grabbed the back of my head and pulled me into his left pit. Now I know that I keep saying how bad everything smelled, but ben’s pits were crazy. I told you earlier how they were always sweaty, well now with my face in one, I can tell you that his armpits most defiantly smelt like they were always sweating. Ben rubbed my face all throughout his pit, making sure that I smelt every nasty detail that hid between his curly underarm hair. “ oh my god, you are so welcome bitch, I know that you must be in heaven right now,but don’t worry you don’t need to thank me. l am so glad that my stink can be your happiness” Ben said in such a cocky manner. As Ben swirled my face around if his pits I realized that if I breathed through my mouth I wouldn’t have to smell his stink anymore, to bad that I wasn’t the only one who realized this. As soon as I started breathing through my mouth Ben got pissed. He released my head from his armpit and through me to the floor. “ how dare you try to avoid smelling my pits, you think you’re so sly? You lost and I won so you are going to do what I say and enjoy it.” Ben shouted angrily. Ben stormed to his suitcase and pulled out a role of duck tape “ you asked for this not me” he stated. With that, Ben picked up one of his sweaty socks and said “ hope you like the taste of feet” and shoved the sock in my mouth. After that he used the duck tape to tape my mouth shut. His sock tasting disgusting, his sweat oozed out of it onto my tongue and I had no choice but to taste it. “Now, where were we?” Ben said as he grabbed the back of my head and pulled it into his other pit. Once again Ben held my face deep in his pit, laughing at me when I struggled. Now with his dirty sock In my mouth I had no choice but to inhale his horrible armpit. After a little while longer of being Bens sweat towel. He released
my head. Ben looked at me and stated to laugh “ okay bitch you look wiped, if you want to be fine just tell me and I’ll stop” I tried to say I wanted to be done but with his sock in my mouth and my mouth being taped shut I couldn’t get a word out. “ okay bro, if you want to keep going that’s fine with me I can go all night” Ben said as he stood up and began to pull down his pants.
Ben pulled down his pants and stood In front of me in nothing but his dirty, sweaty jock strap. He turned around so his bare butt was directly In front of my face. He grabbed the back of my head and pulled my face in between his two furry butt cheeks. “Ohhh yea bro, you’re nose feels so great on my ass. Practice really hurt my gluteus today, but I have a feeling you’re about to make them a whole lot better.” Ben continued to rub his ass with my face. Forcing my nose to be bombarded with such a horrible stench. Drops of sweat had accumulated on the hair on his butt and all I could do was let it happen as Ben mopped the sweat off his ass, with my face. ” okay dude now you are going to put me to bed by massaging my butt with your face.“ Ben stated in a very chill tone. He walked over to his bed and lied down in it, butt up. Reluctantly I walked over to his bed and positioned my face above his hairy bubble butt. Then it began the worst hour of my life. I massaged ben’s ass with my face for a whole hour, he constantly kept ooooing and ahhhing “bitch that feels amazing, oh dude I think we are going to do this every night” he had to have said those things at least six times. Once he decided that I had massaged him long enough he got up and said “ great job tonight bro, It’s only going to get better from here.” With that he went to bed, and everyday on that trip got even more and more gross for me.

Better Together

(since i wrote a fic with richie comforting eddie, it’s only fair i do the same the other way around. also can be read on AO3 here)

Eddie Kaspbrak knows a lot of things.

He knows a single sneeze can send around 100,000 germs into the air alone. He knows it’s better to cough into the inside of your elbow than your hand. He’s aware of the statistic of about 3,600 people a year dying from asthma attacks.

He knows all of this because of the one thing he knows best- what it’s like to have a shitty parent who takes shit care of you.

Keep reading

noddytheornithopod  asked:

An odd thing I've noticed is a lot of people suddenly claiming that the way Lapis is written is inconsistent and doesn't really have a defined character, and I was wondering, why do you think people feel this way? Is it just looking at the surface of her character, or could there be valid arguments from them?

I feel like my reaction to this has two sides here, and one of them is kinda bitter so bear with me

Side 1: the legitimate

Lapis is a multifaceted character and in some ways a misleading one. At her most bitter, hurt, and vindictive, she still spent the day making fart jokes with Steven. The thing about Lapis is that she’s both a very good actor, and in some ways, her emotions tend to surge and move very rapidly. If she’s in a good mood, that shows, and she comes across light and approachable and amiable for the most part. 

If she’s in a bad mood, then she comes across a bit like a fairytale witch who has arrived to curse your newborn and burn your castle down.

This is part of why I see a parallel between Lapis and Ruby- it’s that sense of very fast-moving emotions that tend to vent without too much in the way of a filter. If Lapis is trying to play subterfuge, her response is to more or less package off and try to avoid the entire feeling- better yet, just don’t bring the thing up at all, or acknowledge it even when it’s what everyone around you is talking about.

So yeah, it can be hard to get a single decisive read on Lapis because she’s someone who has a lot of feelings and they can shift very suddenly (see, Lapis in Mirror Gem, where she goes from “you actually talked to me! You helped me! :D” to practically chanting about ancient sins and ready to personally destroy the Crystal Gems in less than five seconds)

Side 2: buckle your pants, kids, because Clockie’s here and I’ve been bitter about this about as long as I’ve been in this fandom

Keep reading

seventeen as things to say when someone asks why you dont want kids

from this post

S.Coups: “I must first capture the avatar to regain my honor.”

Jeonghan: “I can’t be a better parent than Angelina Jolie so why even bother?”

Joshua: “That’s my nindo. My ninja way.”

Jun: *long farting noise lasting at least 45 seconds*

Hoshi: “I heard they’re.. you know.. itchy. Like, as soon as you have a kid. Just totally itchy. Everything.”

Wonwoo: “I’m allergic.”

Woozi: “I promised my firstborn to a witch and really don’t want to make good on the deal.”

DK: “Kids? What are those? I don’t understand. What are these youOH GRAVY WHAT IS THAT!?”

Mingyu: “I’m an Aries.”

The8: “I literally JUST sat down.”

Seungkwan: “Fight me, Helen.”

Vernon: “I’m afraid they’ll have bad taste in memes.”

Dino: “Well you can have them FOR me if it’s that big a deal to you.”

anonymous asked:

*invisible Anon-chan appears when it is close to usual Murami dinner time and leaves magical invisible whoopee cushion on Kou's seat*

Kou: Ah~ Ruki you’re the best! Fried lobster is amazing~ but one day you should make vongole bianco….*takes one of Azusa’s fried lobsters*

Azusa: Kou…you’re being loud…again…


Yuma: Yeah and I saw you steal one of Azusa’s lobsters you little shit!!!

Kou: Ruki~!!!! They’re being mean again! *sits down and huge fart echoes throughout room* 

Azusa: …*scoots away from him*

Yuma: …

Kou: …I…

Ruki:  *sticks head into room*  Kou Mukami….

Kou:  I-it was an accident!!! I swear it!!!

Ruki: Oh really? I doubt an invisible person just came in and put a magical invisible whoopee cushion on your seat.

Azusa: *scoots even further away from him*

Yuma: God you’re so gross! I wonder how your little fangirls would react if I recorded that!

Kou: Shut up!!!  If it was Azusa you wouldn’t have been so hard on him!!!


Azusa: *cringes* Don’t involve me…

Kou: Whatever. A fart from my butt is better than any single thing that has come out of your mouths!  *does a hair flip and stuffs fried lobsters into his pockets before leaving*

Ruki: This is why we can’t have nice things…