okay but like why does every Christmas song involving Christmas presents has the girl wishing for a doll? do people think that’s the only thing girls want, ever?
Run Rudolph Run
Said Santa to a boy child what have you been longing for? All I want for Christmas is a rock and roll electric guitar
Said Santa to a girl child what would please you most to get? A little baby doll that can cry, sleep, drink and wet
It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas
A pair of hop-along boots and a pistol that shoots Is the wish of Barney and Ben Dolls that will talk and will go for a walk Is the hope of Janice and Jen
Up on the Housetop
First comes the stocking of little Nell Oh, dear Santa will fill it well Give her a dolly that laughs and cries One that can open and shut its eyes
Look in the stocking of little Bill Oh, just see what a glorious fill Here is a little hammer and lots of tacks A whistle and a ball and whip that cracks
What I find interesting about this is that the boys have variety … guitars, boots, guns, tacks and … a whip? Uh, does someone need to talk to Bill about this? His stocking has me concerned. But anyway, for girls, always a doll. And I mean, I get that not a lot rhymes with “abolishing the patriarchy” but come on, a little creativity would be nice.
Georgina had been looking forward to tonight, more than she and the rest of her year at school looked forward to the holidays, more than her father looked forward to the yearling sales!- because it was supposed to be the night she got with Dylan Fogarty. He had told her in Chemistry on Thursday afternoon that he couldn’t wait to come to her party, blowing his fringe out of his eyes in that sexy way of his that made all the girls cream their panties, and probably quite a few of the guys as well. And then he had winked at her. Those were his exact words: Sure, I’ll be there. I can’t wait. She hadn’t had an opportunity to speak to him on Friday but he’d grinned at her in the corridor and Laura had elbowed her so hard she thought she’d cracked one of her ribs. But now here it was the night of the party and close to midnight and there was no sign of him, but Felicity Allingham told Isabelle Crowe that Aster Endicott had seen him at the movies with Belinda Faulkner last night, and that they were holding hands, and Isabelle tonight had excitedly shared that information with Laura as well as a menthol cigarette behind the stables, and Laura had told Georgie. And Georgie had felt something flicker and fade inside her, like a candle had been extinguished, not just any crappy old candle, but an expensive, scented one, like the ones Bunty bought from Burberry.
And now Laura and Nell are sitting there giggling about Kelly and Joël. Roy’s best friend, Joël. Her friend, Joël, whom she has known for over ten years. Joël who is almost as familiar to her as her own reflection. But who tonight for the very first time has suddenly acquired a different type of allure, all because Kelly seems to have signalled an interest in him. Georgie feels betrayed, and idiotic, because how can Kelly betray something that doesn’t even exist? But Georgie realises now it has always existed; she was just too young and dumb before to recognise it. And it has nothing at all to do with the fact that Dylan Fogarty stood her up for that slut Belinda Faulkner! Nothing at all!
Nell: Georgie? Hell- loooooo? Laura: Are you still cut up about Dylan?
Georgina shrugs one shoulder, but Nell and Laura’s attention is no longer on her but on Kelly, sauntering towards them with a sly and simpering expression. Georgina feels a wail uncoiling in her throat: she attempts to drown it with several deep swigs from her bottle. Laura and Nell shriek and clap.
Nell: Oh my God, you whore! Tell us everything that happened with Joël! Kelly: Gimme a cigarette first. Nell: We ran out. Do you wanna KGB? Kelly: Ugh. No. That stuff’s disgusting. Laura: You’re disgusting! I saw you with your tongue down his throat!
Georgina feels faint. But Kelly is laughing and protesting no no no and it seems Laura (who is really quite drunk) was only joking and Kelly and Joël did nothing more than dance together, Scout’s honour! Kelly asked Joël if he wanted to go outside with her but he refused, which made Kelly feel sad and rejected, but not for long, because after that Kris asked her to dance and they went outside and made out in the middle of one of the paddocks under the stars and he’s a really good kisser! And he said she smelled really beautiful-
Laura: Because you were rolling round in horse manure. Obviously. Kelly: Ewwwww. Oh my God. Do I smell of manure? Nell: No more than usual. Laura: Mmmmm, I love the smell of horse manure in the mornings- Kelly: What do you think, Georgie? Georgina: Of what? Of manure? Kelly: Of Kris. Georgina: I think you should go for it. Kelly: But I thought you didn’t like him. The other week in Geography you called him an ill-bred yokel- Georgina: Did I? Well, if I did, I must have been joking. Because I think he’s really nice. Seriously. You should totally go for it. He’s lovely. Really. Kelly: He’s not as cute as Joël though. Georgina: Forget about Joël. Trust me, you don’t want to get with any of my brother’s friends. They’re all complete arseholes.
She can feel her face pulsing red under their stares. She hopes they think it is from the alcohol.
I hope you like this drawing, it’s a bit different to what i usually do but I hope it turned out fine. I absolutely love the album you mentioned in your prompt, but the only inspiration I could draw from it was angsty, and I didn’t think that was a very good gift lmao. Anyway i hope this is ok,
also so I had this idea of an au where Bruce and Kate grow up together and end up being Bats at a young age but then you know something happens Kate leaves to her own city but ends up accidentally mirroring the robins with what I'd call the jays with Carrie, Kathleen, Harper, Cass, and then Nell but like I don't feel like I have a good enough grasp on anyone to write it
i’m not really sure how to respond to things like this so if you wanna ignore this it’s chill
something i do when figuring out characters, besides like, you know, the research, is… well, you know how when you’re reading stuff and the person’s obviously read the source material, but it’s still just sort of wrong and you’re there like “they’d never do that”
It’s a little different with comics since there’s so much source material, and you can’t necessarily go out and pick and choose every individual chapter you want to consider as canon.
So what I do is I figure out what a character’s “core values” are. Core values are a handful of traits that form the basis of a full personality. They do not waver or change without a lot of effort, time, and (likely) a lot of distress. If you ask someone their core values, they’re going to say things like “family” “tradition” “freedom” “religion,” etc. because these are the things we’d like to say are our core values. That’s not to say we’re lying– it’s just very, very difficult to ascertain for certain what they are, because they are embedded so deeply into us. Core values are the values that when you find out that someone has a different one, it’s like culture shock. It’s like “how is this NOT the most obvious thing?” Because to someone, your core values are going to be things you take for granted as being important for everyone.
For some people, “I want to survive no matter what” is a representation of a core value– the preservation of self. Of their own comfort. One of their own values is themselves over all else. This is usually used to make a villainous character or antihero by putting someone with that core value in a situation where their own self-preservation is going to harm others.
So what I do with the batfam when I had to write them was to try and figure out their core values, roughly.
Bruce, obviously, does not want to intentionally kill someone. For him to achieve that, he needs to have a strict line in his head as to what constitutes killing someone. If he steps aside and allows someone to fall off a cliff, that is murder. If he lunges out but doesn’t grapple down to try and catch them, that is murder. If he lunges out AND grapples down AND still misses, that’s not murder– but it’s still bad. But not murder.
Another core value he has is community and giving back to it– Bruce is not allowed to exist without giving to something else, usually Gotham. But he feels he must do his best to give back to it and make it a better place for the future–temporary isn’t enough. Make a child laugh? Not enough. For him to fulfill this core value, he must improve the child’s life in a substantial way that can be tracked and noticed. Give to a poor man on the street? Yeah that’s okay but like he knows the institutions in place will take that money and one sandwhich it may buy or one bill it may pay isn’t substantial enough (to him) and therefore isn’t good enough, so he must put motions in place to try and reform Gotham’s systems and economy so that when that homeless person is given money on the street, they won’t lose it to a system for a while, because many of theri other needs are already cared for. He also won’t die, because he has people counting on him, whether they know it/agree with him about that or not. This is why he’s always careful to not do fully stupid plans in service to the community– he’s more valuable to them if he’s alive and can continue serving.
His opinion of himself is also a core value I think? If it can be. The opinions of others absolutely do not matter to him so long as his own opinion is okay. He doesn’t look for approval from others or mind if he’s annoying them–which is probably a ‘culture clash’ moment, but the approval of others simply is not a core value, unlike with Jason for example. Jason absolutely has a core value of wanting others to have a high opinion of him, and when he feels that isn’t the way things are, he gets extremely distressed even if he tries to play it off otherwise. That’s part of why Bruce’s supposed ‘rejection’ hurts him so much, because he values others’ opinions very much. It’s a very common core value, I think, which is why all the Robins in general get very upset if they feel Bruce is shunning them. Tim I think barely even considers doing things that would upset Bruce, part of Dick’s growth as Nightwing was being able to change his core value so that his own opinion was ultimately more important than others’, Steph gets murdered by a comic book writer over her need for validation, and Damian like Jason is trying very hard to pretend the opinions of others don’t matter to him.
This helps a lot when writing because when you’re not sure how a character would react to a situation, you can ask yourself “what’s important to them?”
Once you know your core values for a character, you basically have a quick little cheat sheet for reactions. That’s how you can keep a character recognizable while changing all their circumstances around like in your AU.
If you’re scared of characterization, go pick out waht you can of all those characters from wiki articles and the excerpts floating around the internet, look over their big events and moments, and try and figure out their core values. Then, try to figure out what makes them different when they share core values (something that’s very very important with Tim and Steph, who are both desperate for parents and approval, but Steph gets angry about it but won’t do much harm bc it’s just a flare-up, and Tim gets quiet and vengeful, and tends to be capable of more damage in the long run because he ruminates on his anger.)
They’ll start being recognizable as individual characters a lot faster than you think
words: 1,838 summary: superstar boyfriend jackson doesn’t take too kindly to your suggestion of giving up variety so he has more time for himself and for you.
a/n: hello, this is my first proper writing piece (on this blog since i gave up my 7k 5sos writing blog to start this one) in a while so i hope it’s not too bad for a first piece! also, if you liked it and think i should write a part two, do let me know, your support would mean everything, thank you! -radhobi (nelles)
reaching home at midnight had become a more regular practice as of late.
with jackson away all the time, you found taking up extra shifts - especially the closing shift, when it was all quiet and you got to take home pastries afterwards - a competent way of distracting yourself from missing your superstar boyfriend.
you couldn’t help but groan when you stepped into the hallway of the apartment you and jackson shared, pulling off your sneakers and freeing your toes from their canvas confines after a long day at the cafe.
another groan escaped your mouth as you set your bag down on the couch, falling backwards into the pile of cushions you insisted on having on there, just for that very reason.
you shut your eyes, too tired to force yourself up to shower and get ready for bed. your backpack poking into your side reminded you of the pile of work you had for the weekend and your face scrunched up as yet another groan slipped out of your mouth.
“is this what you do when i’m not here?”
your eyes flew open at the familiar voice and you looked up to see jackson leaning over the side of the couch, his fringe flopping over his eyes slightly, a raised eyebrow peeking through.
“jax!” you yelled, making him wince at the volume and pitch of your shocked shriek.
“jeez, i didn’t know we had a parrot.” he said, the side of his mouth quirked up in a playful smile.
you threw yourself over the side of the couch with energy you didn’t know you still had in you, wrapping your arms around your boyfriend’s - surprisingly - covered torso, hugging him tight.
his arms automatically found their place on your waist as he planted a sweet kiss on the top of your head.
“when did you get back? why are you back? how long are you staying?”
jackson laughed at your sudden bombardment of questions, pulling back from your hug to properly look at you.
as his eyes roamed your face, you suddenly became conscious of the amount of grease and smudged makeup that was the result of being out since eight in the morning without a chance to rest and touch up.
your hands flew from around him to cover your face. “oh god, the first time you see me in person in a while and its while i’m like this.” you said, your voice muffled by your hands.
gentle hands pried your own away from your face and jackson’s face appeared in front of you instead.
“you don’t have to worry about a thing. you look beautiful right now.” he said sweetly, making you smile involuntarily.
“besides, i’ve seen you dance and nothing you do to your face could be worse than that.” he added cheekily, yelling when your hand landed on his shoulder with a loud smack. he just couldn’t be romantic for more than a second.
both laughing, you let yourself be pushed into the bathroom, with jackson making annoying comments on how your hair smelled like cheese gone bad and your makeup looked like you smushed your face in cake.
succumbing to his ever-so-loving words, you showered as quickly as possible to get back out to him.
stepping out of the shower towel-drying your wet hair, you watched your boyfriend lean over his suitcase on the ground, fiddling with the piles of clothes he’d brought with him while filming one of the many variety shows he hosted in china.
as you turned to your dressing table, plugging in the hair dryer, you kept your eyes on him through the mirror. “you can unpack tomorrow, jax, go get ready for bed and we can cuddle and you can answer all my questions.”
his answer was drowned out by the hair dryer and you gestured for him to wait till you were done to tell you.
an hour later, you were both in bed, your head on his pillow, his elbow next to it, holding his head up as he talked about filming.
“ugh, i can’t tell you enough how happy i am that you’re back, the house has been way too quiet without your constant shouting.”
“it’s good to be home.” he responded, his hand reaching around your body to pull you closer to him.
as you pressed your face into his neck and inhaled deeply, an exciting thought flashed into your mind.
you gasped, your eyes widening in realisation. “since you’re back, we can go to the annual college carnival this sunday! i was going to pass on it since going to a carnival alone didn’t seem like much fun and everyone else is either working the carnival or staying home to rush work but you now you can come with me!”
when jackson’s face didn’t light up in excitement as you thought it would, your own smile fell. “what’s wrong?” you asked.
his eyes flittered around, looking everywhere but in your own. “i can’t go to the carnival. i’m leaving again tomorrow, (y/n). got7′s comeback in three weeks and we need to pre-record shows.”
the only word you managed to squeeze out of yourself was “oh.”
jackson sighed. “i’m sorry, i really am. i would’ve loved to go to the carnival with you.”
you managed a small smile, watching his sad eyes and increasingly pouty lips from sulking at not being able to stay long. “hey, it’s okay. they hold one every year so maybe next year you’ll be around to come with me.” you said, trying to reassure him.
jackson sighed once again, wrapping his hands around your body to pull you into him, resting his forehead on yours. “i’m really sorry for not being here enough, it’s just with the comeback nearing, schedule’s a lot more hectic in addition to the new show i’m hosting and i hardly have time for myself with all the flying back and forth and back and forth and i just-” he turned his body to push his face into a pillow and screamed in frustration.
in a second thought, he lifted his face from the pillow. “not that i don’t appreciate everything that i have. i love hosting shows and of course, got7 mean everything to me.”
“i get it, jax, you’re just tired right now, there’s no need to justify venting your frustration.” you said, running your hand along the back of head, through his hair, as he lay on his stomach, his face turned to look at you.
“when do you think you’ll stop it anyway?” you asked.
there was a brief moment of silence as jackson took in your words. “what do you mean stop hosting?” he asked, drawing back a little.
“like, stop doing all the variety shows you’re doing. now that got7′s huge and only getting bigger, you can’t juggle having got7 and hosting and a social life all at the same time.” you elaborated like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
which it was, to you, but had apparently never crossed jackson’s mind.
“i’m just saying, jax, i hardly see you anymore and when i do, it’s like this. short periods of time. i miss having you around.”
jackson sat up suddenly, much to your surprise. “so you’re telling me, that i should give up doing something i love, to be able to spend a bit more time with you?”
“you make it sound like it’s a bad thing.” you commented, not liking the accusing tone he was using.
“you’re asking me to give up my dream career to be able to take you on dates, doesn’t that sound unbelievable to you? you’re lucky i even come back home at all. do you know how hard it is living away from the rest of the boys? how much extra planning has to go into schedules because i’m not as easy to reach?” jackson was practically yelling at this point.
his words were unbelievable to you. “i’m lucky to have you for three to four days at a time with 2 to 3 months in between of not seeing you?” you sat up to be face-to-face with him, your voice rising as well. “i’m lucky to have never been on more than 4 proper dates with you even though we’ve been together almost two years?”
“you knew what you were getting into when we got together and you’ve been putting up with it for so long, why are you only complaining about this now?” he asked, a vein starting to show on his forehead, his face growing increasingly flushed in anger and frustration.
“i was trying to be supportive! but i was suffering, jackson. while you’re off touring the world or filming fun variety shows, i’m here! constantly waiting for you to get back! every time i think i don’t have to wait anymore to spend time with you, something else crops up and you rush to do it, without giving me a second thought.” jackson opened his mouth to protest but you continued. “when have you ever turned down a work thing for me, huh?”
you were aware of how selfish you sounded but as his girlfriend, you would have liked to have been chosen over work just once. you could imagine jackson saying: oh, actually, could we pass on this this time? i have to go home to see (y/n). of course, that was so far out of reach, even imagining it felt surreal.
jackson threw his hands in the air in disbelief. “do you hear yourself right now? oh, i’m so sorry i can’t just drop my entire career to fly home to be at your beck and call.”
it was your turn to scream in frustration. you could hardly believe the person in front of you was the same lovable, hyperactive jackson wang everyone else saw, the same one you fell in love with a couple years ago.
“i am not asking you to drop everything for me, i never asked you to drop everything for me. i-”
“good, because i won’t. not for you.”
his words struck you hard. they made it seem as if you weren’t worth it and all your insecurities of having jackson meet someone he’d much rather be with rushed into your head, making a lump form in your throat.
“fine. then don’t.” you said, immediately throwing yourself back onto the bed, grabbing your pillow and shifting it to the edge of the bed, away from jackson, squeezing your eyes shut and swallowing hard to make sure you didn’t cry in front of him.
it took just a few seconds for jackson to lie down as well, and you knew if you turned around to check, he would be facing away from you.
pushing his face and his words out of your head, you willed yourself to sleep. as you drifted into slumber, your self-control faltered and a single tear rolled down the side of your face and onto the pillow.
Can I just take this opportunity to say how much I have enjoyed writing these prompts. I’ve never took part in anything like this before, It’s been fun.
Day 7 (10th September) - Write a scene, from a storyline, you wish would be given to Robert:
Again I’m not sure this fits the prompt but I wanted to shoehorn it in anyway. Basically Rebecca is Nell, in other words crazy. We can but hope can’t we?
Robert sat at the bar staring into his pint. He kept shooting sly glances at where Aaron was sat with Adam. But Adam had made it very clear when the two of them walked in that he was not welcome to join them. He kind of wanted to just get up and go but he was determined to finish his pint first, he didn’t want to look like a coward.
Victoria walked past him with some food, she looked at him before looking over at Aaron and back at him again. When she’d delivered the food she stopped next to him on her way back to the kitchen.
“Just go and talk to him” she hissed in his ear.
“No, I can’t, he doesn’t want me to” he shook his head at her.
“Oh really” she said a little louder. “Is that why he keeps shooting heart eyes at you every time your back is turned”.
“Heart eyes? What are you, fifteen?. And no he doesn’t” he rolled his eyes at her.
“I know what I’m talking about, and yes he does” she rolled her eyes back at him.
“Well if you’re so good at recognising it how come you haven’t seen the ones Adam keeps shooting at you?”
“Who says I haven’t” she smirked, turning her head slightly to look at the two men. “But that’s different anyway”.
“Why is it?” Robert was genuinely curious as to why she was still resisiting getting back with Adam when it was obvious that was what they both wanted.
“Fine, you know what I’ll go over there and talk to Adam if you come and talk to Aaron”.
“Okay” Robert said surprising his sister. It was actually a pretty good idea, with Vic distracting Aaron’s bodyguard he might actually get a chance to talk to him for once.
Just as he got off his stool to head over there the door to the pub opened and Pete walked in supporting a shaken looking Rebecca. Robert resisted the urge to roll his eyes, typical she would show up now. It was like she had some kind of sixth sense whenever it came to him and Aaron.
“Oh my god, what happened?” Vic said racing over to them, that was when Robert noticed that Rebecca had a small cut on her eyebrow, blood trickling down the side of her face.
“Pete” Emma had been sitting at the other end of the bar, deep in conversation with Finn about something but now she hurried over to see what was happening.
“I swear I didn’t see her” Pete said looking worried. “I was looking at my phone and I just walked straight into her, I knocked her flying”.
“I told you it’s fine” Rebecca smiled at him weakly. “I’m fine”.
“But what about the baby?” Vic sounded a little frantic, Robert walked over to join the small crowd gathered around her, feeling a little bit of concern.
“That’s just it, she landed right on her stomach” Pete looked stricken at the fact that he had just knocked a heavily pregnant woman over.
“Maybe I should have a look” Emma said.
“No” Rebecca snapped causing most of them to frown. “I’ve told you I’m okay”.
“Better safe than sorry” Emma said pushing her to sit down in one of the chairs.
Rebecca looked panicked for a minute but when Emma picked her wrist up to check her pulse she relaxed a little bit.
“When is it that your due?” Emma asked her, looking at the cut on her eyebrow as she spoke. From what Robert could tell it looked pretty superficial.
“Erm I…. erm, end of next month” Rebecca looked flustered. Robert frowned again. He wasn’t sure why it had never occurred to him before but up until now he had no idea when this baby was due. Now that could mainly be down to how little interest he had in it, but the fact that Rebecca didn’t just come out with a specific date seemed really odd. Didn’t woman normally have an exact date?
“Well I’m just going to have a little feel of your tummy, make sure everything seems okay?”
“But your not even a midwife” Rebecca said starting to stand up.
“No, but I am a trained medical professional” Emma said pushing her back down gently.
“Just let her check you out Rebecca please” Victoria said from where she was hovering over her. Robert had backed up slightly, his mind in overdrive.
Rebecca sighed and sagged back into the seat, Robert didn’t miss the worried look she shot him or the fact that she even looked over at where Aaron and Adam were sat watching what was happening.
Emma reached a hand out and gently prodded Rebecca’s distended bump. As she prodded and poked gently her face gradually started to change, her eyes narrowing in confusion.
“What is it?” Vic asked picking up on the other woman’s confused expression.
“I think I need to have a look” Emma said, her eyes wide, her mouth a thin tight line.
“You don’t need to” Rebecca looked frantic.
“No I really think I do” Emma insisted.
“You don’t have to be embarrassed” Vic put a comforting hand on her shoulder. “I know you don’t like showing your belly off, but I think a pregnant belly is beautiful”.
“I’m not embarrassed” Rebecca snapped at her. “I just don’t want this nosy cow poking about anymore” Vic took a step back, Rebecca’s reaction catching her off guard.
“What’s going on?” Robert finally spoke up, this whole thing was weird.
“Do you want to tell him or should I?” Emma asked.
“Tell me what?” Robert asked.
“Nothing, she doesn’t know what she’s talking about” Rebecca hissed. She stood up, swaying slightly and raising a hand to her bloodied head.
“Hey, take it easy” Pete said putting his hand out to steady her.
“Don’t touch me” Rebecca cried out trying to back away. Emma wouldn’t let her though. She moved closer to her and in a move Robert wasn’t expecting in the slightest she pulled her top up, exposing her stomach to everyone in the pub.
Except that’s not what they were seeing, instead of a rounded belly all they could see was more material.
At first Robert just figured that she was wearing a t shirt or something underneath her other top, that was until Vic gasped. She lunged at the other woman and before anyone could stop her she had grabbed hold of her belly and pulled. There was a disturbing ripping sound, which made Robert wince until he saw his sister stood there holding a weird shaped cushion, velcro straps hung from it, obviously the source of the noise.
Rebecca stood there, her flat toned belly on full view for everyone to see.
“You stupid bitch” she screeched, flying at Victoria, before anyone could react, everyone had just been stood there in stunned silence, unable to get their heads round what they were seeing. She slapped Victoria, hard, round the face, bringing everyone back to their senses. Pete who was standing closest to her grabbed her and pinned her arms to her side before she could do anymore damage.
Aaron and Adam had got out of their seats when they saw what was happening. Adam quickly at Victoria’s side checking to see if she was okay. Robert was vaguely aware of the fact that he should probably be checking on his sister but he was in shock. He just kept looking between the cushion that Vic still held and Rebecca’s flat stomach.
“I don’t…I don’t understand” he stammered out.
“She’s not pregnant Rob, there is no baby” Vic said crying into Adam’s shoulder. She threw the cushion at Rebecca, who made no move to catch it.
“What the hell?” Pete said, he’d let go of Rebecca but he still stood watching her, his eyes wary.
“I’m sorry Robert” Rebecca made as if to move towards him, but he took a step back, almost bumping into Aaron who was standing beside him now, his eyes wide open and shocked.
“Why?” was all Robert could get out.
“Because I love you” Rebecca wailed, her eyes wet with tears.
“What?” Araon said.
“I love him, he’s supposed to be with me” Rebecca snarled at him.
“So I was right, this was a trap” Aaron’s jaw was tight as he glared at her, but Robert could see the tears in his eyes.
“When will you get it through your thick skull” Robert shouted at her. “I don’t love you, I never will, it’s Aaron that I love, nothing can change that. But now, wow, I don’t even know what to say, this is beyond crazy”.
“I went with you to the scan” Victoria frowned.
“I paid the woman to fake it” Rebecca shrugged, like it was no big deal.
“Was there….was there ever a baby?” Vic asked, she looked more heartbroken than anyone.
Rebecca shook her head.
“How could you do this?” Vic sobbed and Adam hugged her to him, all the while glaring at Rebecca.
“Did we even sleep together?” Robert asked and Rebecca actually laughed at the question. He felt like punching her.
“God no, you were so wasted, you just cried and then passed out. You wanted to though, I know you did, you’ve always wanted me” she blinked rapidly at him as she spoke, it was unsettling.
Robert just shook his head at her, he didn’t trust himself to speak right now.
“You really are insane aren’t you”? Aaron said sadly.
“Takes one to know one doesn’t it? Why do you think he came to me in the first place. Because he was sick of having to deal with you and you’re pathetic daddy issues” Robert took a step towards her then, the only thing stopping him was Aaron’s hand on his arm pulling him back.
“She’s not worth it” Aaron told him, but he could hear the hurt in his voice.
“I’m not worth it, I’m not worth it?” Rebecca screeched. “You think you’re so special don’t you? But he doesn’t love you, he can’t, not properly, because you’re a man. I can give him what he really wants. I can give him the only thing you can’t. A family”.
“Except there is no baby” Robert shouted at her. “Even if there was I wouldn’t want you, you’re nothing to me. Aaron is everything”.
“No” Rebecca sank to the floor sobbing. “Don’t say that, we can still do this. I need you. We can really have a baby, we’ll be the perfect family”.
Robert looked at her, there on the floor, so pathetic and some of his anger fizzled out. She needed help, there was something seriously wrong with her. He looked around at the people stood there with him.
“Rebecca” Emma said getting down on the floor next to her. “Why don’t you come with me?”
“What, where?” Rebecca looked up at her, she looked scared.
“You don’t have to be scared, I think we should get that cut checked out, and then maybe we could talk to some people”/
“I’m not mad” Rebecca said.
“No, no of course not. It’s just these people, they’re friends of mine. They’re really good to talk too”.
Rebecca reached a hand up and touched her still slightly bleeding eyebrow.
“Um okay, I guess” she seemed totally out of it. Robert could see how unhinged she was, it was actually kind of scary, seeing her like this, all over the place.
“Will you come with me?” she asked him.
“What?” he couldn’t believe she was asking him that, after everything. Emma caught his eye over her head and he read the expression there. She was warning him not to set her off again. Who knows what she was capable off in this state. “Um I can’t right now, but I’ll come and see you later, okay”. He felt Aaron squeeze his am and he knew he’d said the right thing.
“Oh okay” Rebecca said sadly, but she let Emma lead her gently from the pub, Pete following behind, looked totally lost as to what was happening.
As soon as the door shut behind them Robert felt his knees buckle, the only thing keeping him from hitting the floor was Aaron holding him up.
“Oh my god” Vic said. “I can’t believe that just happened”.
“No me neither” Adam said. “I think I need drink”.
“I think everyone does” Charity spoke up from behind the bar, Robert couldn’t believe she hadn’t spoken up sooner. “Wow I thought I could be twisted” she said before turning to pour some drinks.
“You all right?” Aaron asked him as he helped him to a stool and stood next to him, his hand still on his arm.
“I’ve no idea” Robert told him truthfully. He looked at Aaron then, could see the tears in his eyes and the look of concern on his face, concern for him. “What about you?”
Aaron shrugged picking up the glass that Charity had put down in front of him and drinking it in one gulp. He winced as it went down, he’s always hated the taste of hard liquor. Robert picked his own drink up, noticing his hand was shaking as he did so.
“What now?” he said downing his own drink in one go just like Aaron had a moment earlier.
“No idea” Aaron said, copying his own words from only moments ago. “I think I’ll start with having another drink though” he said holding it up to show Charity it was empty.
Robert felt numb, he’d barely felt the burn of the alcohol going down. All he could feel was Aaron’s hand on his arm, warm and steady, it felt good, like it belonged.
Hello Nel, Can I call you Nel? I just wanted to l am proud of you for going through the drama you are. Long before I had an account I have loved your art and words cannot express how much I want to hug you right now. No matter how much happens, I will love your Ninjago art (and art in general) forever. I'm in the process of making you art and will tag you in it when I am done, but for now I will help you keep hope! -Anon who would like to be friends(?)
Nelly, Nell, Nel I don’t mind but how short do u want it to get? prff okno.
Ok leaving those aside. That’s… honestly really sweet of u.. And I’m left with no words anymore c’: .. I’m so happy to hear that. Thank u
Nell said the words like they were an apology, and perhaps they were.
She had come to him last in her round of goodbyes, eyes shadowed and words tense with the emotions that he knew she wouldn’t speak of.
He had an hour.
An hour before she stepped back through the mirror, an hour before he might never see her again.
He didn’t want to waste any of it.
It had been hard to send her after Corypheus, even with soldiers at her back and her friends at her side, but even through his fear he’d had hope. Hope in the Maker, hope in the mark, hope in her.
Cullen didn’t let himself look at her arm as her drew her closer, didn’t let himself see the sickly green glow that was slowly taking over; the pulse of it painful enough, he knew, to keep her expression strained and her attention not quite focused. He also didn’t let himself see how pale she was, or how exhaustion carved itself into her skin, or the deep purple smudged around bloodshot eyes. Instead he pulled her toward him, and buried his face into her neck.
He knew her, knew the smell of her, the feel of her in his arms, and the taste of her against his tongue; he remembered every smile, every gesture, every sound that was his alone, but he made himself try and memorize it all over again.
And then Nell’s fingers were flexing into his back, and her face was pushing itself further into his shoulder and he knew, just like he knew everything else about her, she was trying to do the same thing.
An hour wasn’t enough.
It wasn’t nearly enough when you had hoped, dreamed, counted on a lifetime. It wasn’t enough when you knew that what waited after could likely feel like an eternity if they weren’t there with you. It wasn’t enough when you would continue to age, change, live, while they stayed always the same in your mind, lost to dreams and hopes that died along with them.
It wasn’t enough, and it wasn’t fair.
Cullen’s arms tightened on their own, some vain attempt to pull her into him, make her a part of him, so that this wouldn’t have to end. He wouldn’t have to let go of her, wouldn’t have to watch her pull away, and wouldn’t have to chance her going somewhere that they both knew he couldn’t follow.
Not now, not yet.
“I love you.”
Precious word, coming from her.
“I love you so much. I’m sorry.”
Cullen wasn’t sure what the apology was for. Wasn’t sure if she meant to say she was sorry for leaving him, or if she was sorry for making him love her in the first place. As if she could have stopped him.
But apologies weren’t needed, not for this, not for them, and so he made himself release her, his hands coming up to skim over her leather clad arms as he searched for words to make her understand.
“I’m not. You are the best thing that could have ever happened to me. I could live a thousand more lifetimes and I will never forget a single moment of this, of us, not a single heartbeat.”
And then she was pulling him back down, her lips cutting off his continued declarations of love, and if they both pretended that their hands did not slip over suddenly damp skin as they cupped each other’s faces it mattered little.
“If I can come back, I will,” Nell murmured, the words felt more than heard as their breath mixed between them. She knew that he wouldn’t want false bravado, though she so often defaulted to it, and so simply gave what she could.
This is probably a very odd thing to say but I was just thinking that I really like your name! It has a lovely, clever-yet-cosy ring to it, if that makes sense. It almost sounds literary - or perhaps that's just the associations I have with it! Happy 2018, and thanks for running this wee blog, I enjoy it loads.
Awww, thank you! Can’t say I had much say in it - I’m named after my great grandmother, who was also an Ellen (or rather, a Nell - like in Wuthering Heights!). People often mishear it, and think it’s Helen, or else assume that it’s short for something else.
I’ve had this discussion with people before, about ‘author names’ - I think it’s also the initial which helps!
Hope you’re having a lovely start to 2018 too - thanks for your message! <3