i hope to god this was on purpose

threefivestep  asked:

Your voltron headcannons cured my cancer and added 12 years to my lifespan

if i applied to med school could i like. cite this as a reference

  • *something happens* lance: “hashtag yikes” 
    • keith: “how about you never say the word ‘hashtag’ out loud again” lance: “um hashtag salty much?”
  • allura and keith will judge each other for making bad decisions while in the process of making the exact same bad decisions
  • *hunk voice* “justice…… is served”
  • shiro mentally refers to every voltron mission as Operation FUBAR
  • [allura decks lotor] “your princess is in another castle”
  • hunk introduces keith to people as Galra Keith. it’s his full title now
  • one time pidge didn’t wanna go to the kitchen for a glass of water so she spent an hour programming a robot to do it for her instead
    • robot: “what is my purpose” pidge: “you get me water” robot: “……..oh my god” pidge: “yeah welcome to the club, pal”
  • coran, holding out his fist for a fist bump: “hunk!! fist me!!!” hunk: “oh man this is really not a conversation i wanna have”
[Major Spoilers] “Follow your true feelings!”: My Musings on P5′s Wildcard Couple

Can we talk about Morgana’s astute observations regarding Akechi’s true feelings for Akira? Can we talk about how (Morgana’s words–not mine) Akechi’s smile when he was hanging out with Akira had been genuine? This boy– who had distanced himself from everyone, who had wrapped himself up in layers upon layers of lies that he wears like a second skin, who had made revenge his one and only goal in life – had also, in spite of himself, serendipitously found kinship in the one boy whom he has decided that he has to kill. 

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“Our conscious minds are very spread out. We worry about the past. We worry about the future. We label. And all of that stuff just makes us very separate. What I’m trying to do is just quiet it down. Put that brain down from time to time and hope those periods of quiet and stillness get longer. When you do that, what rises from the mist is a kind of surrendering. You’re more connected as opposed to being separate. A lot of the questions about destiny or fate or purpose or any of that stuff—it’s not like you get answers. You just realize you didn’t need the questions.”

Fuck 4/20

****Obligatory Discourse Notice: This post is not about people who use weed for medicinal purposes y’all are beautiful and in my experience, courteous people and I hope you feel better soon****

**This is also not about people who consume recreationally in the privacy of their homes, y’all are cool too**

Ok, so, it’s 4/20, and I can’t fucking go to school because SOME ASSHOLES HOT-BOXED THE MAIN STUDIO ROOM IN THE ART BUILDING.

This is not a small room, it’s three classrooms combined into one large, naturally well-lit room, so god knows how much weed they actually had to burn to fill it like that, but it was definitely more than CO possession law allows for.  and at 8 AM this morning, I opened the fucking door to a literal CLOUD of smoke, while at least three dudes ran out the back door.

I’m not sure if it’s an allergy or sensitivity or what, but even hints of Marijuana smoke give me massively painful migraines, so I had to be driven home, and I’ve spent the last five hours on the couch crying and puking and having hallucinations becuase I was in that much pain. Fuck you guys I haven’t been suicidal in years but today was not a good day.

OH, and the department head was right behind me, and she has severe asthma and i just learned she’s in the hospital.

and the campus has closed the art building until further notice/they can clean the place out.  it’s the week before finals.  Nobody is going to be able to finish/turn in their final projects. and even if they manage to air out the building, nobody with an allergy/sensitivity is gonna be able to go in becuase that shit sticks around.  or anyone with asthma or epilepsy or anybody on other psychoactive drugs.

So, yeah, fuck you guys, you’ve ruined the whole fucking semester.

and the thing that really, really pisses me off about this?  Cannabis DOES potentially have some major health/environmental benefits, and widespread decriminalization would be a great thing for a lot of america’s poorer communities, BUT NOOOOOOO, YOU DICKHOLES GOTTA SMOKE IN PUBLIC WHERE IT’S A HEALTH HAZARD AND BE A BUNCH OF IRRESPONSIBLE FUCKHEADS, NEVER MIND THAT GETTING IT OFF SCHEDULE ONE IS GONNA TAKE A COOPERATIVE POLITICAL MOVEMENT LOL 420 BLAZE IT HAHAHAHAHA FUCK ALL OF YOU WITH A RUSTY CHAINSAW.

YOU, fuckass stoner, are the person making it hard to get the actual drug-testing done for the people who need this
YOU are being massively disrespectful and an outright danger to your fellow citizens and 
YOU are gonna get kicked right in the dick if i ever figure out who you are.

Actually, there’s security cams, and when you are ID’d I’m suing your ass for damages because going to the hospital was not fun and expensive.  

*I’ve been seen by a medical professional, they’re not sure what it is, and i have a history of unexpected reactions to drugs, so the can’t give me anything for it.

** I’ve taken a shower and am chugging all the fluids I can to get this to pass, and it is.  my pain is at about 6/10, not 11 now.

*** This is ALSO about the people in the quad lighting up in public, the people who brought the bong into the student union (campus cops got them at least), and anyone who DOESN’T UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT OF SECOND-HAND SMOKE CHRIST ON POGO STICK YOU SHITHEADS ARE DUMB.

***8ALSO: dear creepy old men who were stoners back in the 60′s who show up on campus to on women young enough to be your granddaughters: FUCK YOU TOO

In conclusion: Fuck 4/20, fuck public stoner culture, fuck white boys who think this shit is funny, fuck the Marijuana industry that pushes this kind of irresponsible consumption, and fuck everything I have to go throw up again.

In Defense of Maggie Sawyer

@danvers-dimples​ said: I need your help. My sister is NOT a Maggie fan. She especially doesn’t like the “you get one” line, she found it too harsh. She finds Maggie herself too unfeeling. I completely disagree to be clear. Anyway could you write some good points for me to show my sister on why she’s wrong and Maggie is in fact a pure being, gifted to us from the Gods. Please.

Hey kids, it’s your friendly neighborhood Maggie Sawyer stan finally here to type up a way too detailed analytical post regarding two of the biggest misplaced criticisms of Maggie. I hope you don’t mind me bouncing off of your ask for this, but it presented me with the opportunity to do one of my absolute favorite things: defend unjustifiably hated female characters that I adore in a manner much too extra for fandom purposes. I’ll be taking a look at the most revealing aspects of Maggie’s character as they’ve been presented thus far, getting a little meta about her role within the show overall, and doing my best to explain away some of the popular misunderstandings of Maggie as a character, with particular emphasis on the differences between “Unfeeling” vs “Emotionally Reserved”, and “Harsh” vs “Honest”. Obvious disclaimer: this is quite long.

“Unfeeling” vs “Emotionally Reserved”:

From what I’ve seen, one of the biggest and most frustrating misinterpretations of Maggie’s character is the twisting of her emotional reservation into coldness. This one surprises me every time I encounter it, if I’m honest, if only because “unfeeling” is one of the absolute last words I’d use to ever describe Maggie for a multitude of reasons. 

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Chaos in the Pantheon (Part 7)

((A/N: As promised, the next chapter ASAP. It’s getting rather intense, for those who haven’t noticed. I’m pretty excited about where it’s going. There’s also the potential for a ‘spin-off’ of sorts, depending on how it’s received. This one I loved writing. I love it all, but this is bananas. 

Pairing: Bucky Barnes (Ares) x Reader

Word Count: 3.3k 

Warnings: Language, awkwardness, alcohol use. Also: hilarity. 

Catch up!: Part 1// Part 2// Part 3// Part 4// Part 5// Part 6//))

Ares wasted no time in getting to you, that was for sure. He moved with the speed Hermes had endowed in him without much care for the fact that he was likely on Zeus’ radar at this point. There was a feeling of need and fear as he made his way to you as fast as his feet could take him. He saw you, in his mind’s eye, and felt your pain. He wasn’t entirely sure what he was seeing, but he knew it was the beginning of the explanation for why Zeus was so terribly interested in you.

The wonderful part about gods on earth, all of the Pantheon had found, was that they could blend with ease. In truth very few humans knew the real forms of the gods and those that did were said to have been under a spell when approached. It was how Ares was able to run towards where you were in time to watch the fire burn out.

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the bronco (g.d.)

 ~HEY Y’ALL. I’ve had the worst writer’s block I’ve probably ever had, and that’s why I haven’t been posting much. I’m hoping this lil blurb will help unblock me. For now, I hope you guys enjoy. :)


**Warnings: nothing major, just some cursing and suggestive language. 

(Song mentioned:The Prayer” - Kid Cudi)

“My heart thump, not from being nervous. Sometimes, I’m thinking God made me special here on purpose. So all the while, ‘til I’m gone, make my words important so if I slip away, if I die today…”

Cruising down a seemingly endless country road, the familiar, soothing lyrics rolled effortlessly off the tongue of your boyfriend as he quietly sang along to his favorite artist. The setting sun emitted the most stunning golden glow, adding onto the warmth the faded pink color of his over-sized hoodie brought to his skin. Tousled hair paired with the hoodie and a pair of dark shorts came together to give off a comfy, laid back vibe.

Grayson was currently behind the wheel of the brand new, custom made Bronco his twin brother had surprised him with just hours before.

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anonymous asked:

an imagine where Alex and (y/n) are hanging out and as (y/n)'s on her phone he decides to tease her, but he eventually takes her phone and runs away to spam her with his selfies as a joke, but sees that she was texting about him in a gc about how she wishes they could be more than friends and the end is all fluffy and flirty? pleasee

sure thing, anon. Hope you like ~

845 words, Alex Standall/fem!reader

Alex and you sat on your bed, nonchalantly talking to each other while scrolling through your phones. You hung out like this all the time, communicating by showing each other stuff on your phone. Alex was the first to put his phone away, sighing deeply before flopping back onto your pillows. You gave a gentle laugh before continuing to scroll through your feed. 

“You gonna put that away?” he eventually asked, you shaking your head in response - you knew you should but, hey, you felt like it. “I’ll take it away for you,” he lunged forward and took your phone into his hand, running off around your house with you running behind him for a bit of the way. You had nothing to hide, so instead walked back to your room. 

Through the snaps of the front camera a notification game through. It looked like it was a group chat, and the message read: 

How’s your boyfriend?

Alex being nosy as ever opened the notification and saw a string of texts saying nearly the same thing. Some mentioned his name - and they all seemed to be directed at you. 

Ask him out!
You’re always together…
You’ve had the biggest crush on Alex since I met you 
Just do it!
PLEASE tell me you’re dating already

You responded the same way every time.

Sadly not my boyfriend 

He’ll say no to me

Yeah but he thinks we’re just hanging out as friends
And? I doubt he feels the same

 Again sadly not, no more than friends…

Alex scrolled through until he found a part of the conversation that was about music and not him and you. Pondering it, he clicked your phone off and ran a hand down his face. 

“She likes me?” he whispered to the desolate hallway. He’d been meaning to say something to you about a similar issue… and here was his chance. He started back up the stairs towards your room, spinning your phone between his thumb and forefinger, trying to calm him. He prayed it wasn’t a joke, and that he wasn’t going to go in there and embarrass himself.

Meanwhile, you’d remembered that you had an ongoing conversation about him, and were worrying that you did have something to hide. 

“Hey y/n, look through your gallery, there’s some pretty sexy stuff in there,”

“I don’t doubt it,” you tease, half serious, half not. This had a whole new meaning to Alex, that you kind of meant that. Handing your phone back, you put it on your bedside and decided that you were going to be a normal pair of friends and actually talk.

“Put it away, I see,” 

“Mmm, would rather see your face,” 

“Oh? See, if I were you, I’d rather see your face in the reflection of the screen,”

Alex was now near existential about what he’d said, was he being too cringey? Too obvious? Wasn’t that the point, to try and get a confession from you? Oh god…

“See, but I am me, and I know that I would rather see you,” you flirted back, licking your lips as you thought. “You read the messages, didn’t you?”

“Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t…” he said, trying to be cryptic. You laughed and shoved him lightly away from you, indicating that you wanted him to stop screwing around. “Fine, fine… I just wanted to know who your boyfriend was,”

“God damn, well if you’re still wondering, it’s no-one,”

“Yeah, yeah - I’d figured that much.” 

“Whatever, Standall. I’m so embarrassed, I hope you know that,” you giggled, trying to cover up the fact that you wanted to disappear into the ground with humor. 

“Don’t be, if I had friends like yours, believe me, you’d probably find the exact same thing on my phone,” he brought his voice to a whisper so you both had to lean in closer for him to be heard. He was purposely making things intimate, testing your patience. 

“I don’t doubt it,” you played at his intimacy game by closing the space between you two, hovering your lips over his, kissing his lips with your breath. He chased for your actual touch when you pulled away, happy you’d succeeded at teasing him. “Ah, ah, ah; you get this if you prove it to me,” gesturing to your general body, you tried on a whole new hard-to-get persona. 

“How do I do that?” he asked, though he obviously knew by the way he backed you up to your bed, the back of your legs hitting the frame and falling backwards when you couldn’t move any further back. He crawled on top of you. You expected him to be rough, but his touched were sweet and caring, kissing you all over your arms, your neck and your face (even getting a little daring and moving down your torso). You snaked your arms around his neck, pulling his head closer to your body, after a while you let your hands run up to his hair, intertwining your fingers into the short strands of hair. 

Road to Schkeuditz [Part 21]

Word Count: 530
Warnings: Bucky overthinking ever single one of his actions towards you.
Summary: So much has changed with the Sokovian Accords. The team is divided in half, and you’re not sure where you stand. You know you should sign the Accords, but it doesn’t feel right. After a conversation with Sharon, Steve, and Sam at the prison, you realize that you don’t want to sign them. Now you, Steve, Sam, and Bucky are on a mission to get to the Leipzig airport…in the tiniest car imaginable…so you can clear Bucky’s name.
A/N: *Non-Canonical story line.*  Dear god, guys. There’s only 3 parts left. How is this real life? Thank you guys for always sending me such sweet messages about my story!! I hope you guys like this part! <3
Please send me feedback, it makes my day!

[Road to Schkeuditz Masterlist]

19 Hours, 5 Minutes

The sun was bright and high in the sky. The shadows cast by the buildings and clouds made everything look picturesque. You’re feeling a bit nostalgic and purposeful. You decided you wanted to come back to this city, back to Germany, when this was all over. You wanted to travel more. Take more vacations. Make more Good Will trips. You chew on your lips and contemplate it all.

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The Joker x Reader - “Mrs. Frost”

Frost’s cousin got engaged and he needs to go to the engagement party in Nebraska. Since he doesn’t have a girlfriend, Jonny wants you to pose as his significant other, this way he doesn’t look stupid. Of course The Joker doesn’t like the idea, but dammit, your best friend needs help.

Best friends saga: http://diyunho.tumblr.com/post/153980061476/the-joker-x-reader-best-friends




“Absolutely not!! NO! No way!” J grumbles when you ask to go with Frost. “You’re my girl, not his!” he hisses, feeling the blood running through his veins faster.

“Come on, baby, pleeaseee, you know he just broke up with his girlfriend and he can’t go alone,” you pout, slowly rocking your body in front of him, trying to appear as adorable as possible.

“I’ll let you know when I care,” he growls, unhappy at the situation.

“You gotta be nice to him sometimes, J. He’s the best man we have, you know that,” you go and sit in his lap, strategically placing a kiss on his neck, one of the weak spots you so well know about.

“I am nice,” he replies, taking a deep breath, suddenly warmer.    It’s working.

“Like when, baby?!” you try to find an example and can’t find any in your recent memory.

“He’s still alive, I didn’t kill him yet! Isn’t that nice of me?” J scoffs, proud of his achievement. “Like, what other proof do you need??!!”

“Please, boss, I promise I will take good care of her; it’s just for 2 days,” Jonny finally speaks, trying his luck. Man, he really doesn’t want to show up there without anybody by his side.

“Maybe you should have held onto your girl the way I hold on to mine, hmm? I still have her because I know how to treat a lady,” he scoffs, making sure his hair is slick the way it’s supposed be, overconfident in his boyfriend material skills.

Ha!” escapes your lips before you can stop it.

“What is that supposed to mean, Pumpkin?” The Joker puckers his lips, waiting for an answer.

You don’t reply, just kiss the sensitive spot again, breathing on his skin for a few seconds and that sends shivers down his spine.

“Please baby, I really want to go…yes?” you move your hand under his unbuttoned shirt, caressing the soft skin while giving him the look. Ahhh, the look: that’s the secret weapon you use when you really want it your way. This is one of those times that require special strategy: all gloves are off because your best friend needs help.

“Ummm…no…” he whispers but his determination went down a notch. His eyelashes flutter while you keep on staring at him with that naughty, devilish smile on your face.

“I’ll go crazy on you if you say yes, you bad boy,” you bite your lip, winking at him and signal Frost to get out with the free hand behind your back.

He gulps, slapping your thigh, pretending not to care:

“You always go crazy on me, Princess.”
“Yeah, well, think of that times four…hmmm?” you smirk, pulling on his bottom lip and he grins, intrigued:


Even five!” you are fast to add, your hand sliding down his waist as you kiss his neck, biting the soft skin from time to time. He purrs, enjoying the sensation and you already have some insane things in mind for him.

Jonny closes the door behind him, trying not to make a sound. “Poor Y/N, the things she has to do for me. I don’t deserve her; she really is the best friend someone can have,” he thinks with pride and if this was a movie, there would truly be some heroic music playing in the background.


“Oh, wow, you have such cool tattoos!” Frost’s family remarks after you were introduced as his girlfriend about 15 minutes go. There are probably about 30 people at the house. Smalltalk started on the way to the living room and it cracks you up they have no clue about what he does for a living. He’s not really close with anybody so he barely sees them from time to time, that’s why they are oblivious to his lifestyle. And he wants it that way. But for certain events like this one you just have to man up and go with the flow- in this case go with your boss’s girl.

Property of J, I Love J, J+ Y/N, J & Y/N Forever… Wow, Jonny, she has so many tattoos with your name, I think it’s super cool,” his cousin gets excited while reading them. If they only knew it’s not about him… but since Joker and Jonny share the same initial, works like a charm. At least no one but your real boyfriend can see the Property of Joker tattoos scattered in different…places on your body, otherwise they would be intrigued on why Frost’s name is not there.

“He is one lucky bastard,” you blur out, holding onto his arm and when his grandma gives you a disapproving glance you correct yourself immediately. “Aren’t you honey?” you sweetly smile, pecking his shoulder. Grandma seems to like that and she nods in agreement.

“I really am lucky, she’s amazing you guys,” Frost kisses your temple, addressing everyone and they all go “awwwwww”. One of the aunts touches your hair, mesmerized:

“I really love your hair, sweetheart, it’s so bright. Does it take a long time to do?” she admires you bright red locks with neon green tips.

“No, not at all. J helps me, I mean Jonny,” you fix your tiny mistake even if you didn’t have to, sipping from your drink.

“When are you guys getting married?” his oldest uncle suddenly asks and you kind of roll your eyes. Frost is fed up with this dumb question they ask every time he brings someone over at the rare gatherings he attends so he spits out:

“We’re getting married soon, I asked yesterday and she said yes.”

“Oh my God!” the relatives scream and rush over to hug you both. “Congratulations, this is great!” You are speechless and pinch his arm so hard his eyes get teary.

“So, Mrs. Frost, when will the happy event take place? Soon after our wedding, I hope?” the groom-to-be excitedly inquires.

“Aaa, we don’t really know yet,” you grin, trying to keep your composure because you didn’t expect this shit.

“Look at the sparkler Jonny got her,” grandma takes your hand, studying the huge diamond ring that The Joker got you for your 3 year anniversary. You just wear it like a wedding ring.

“Good job, my man,” the guys shake Frost’s hand and pat his back. For the first time ever you just want to kill him.
“Jesus, would you just kiss your blushing bride?” his niece giggles and pushes the two of you together.

“Blushing??!! Who?” you repeat, confused while Jonny barely brushes your lips against yours so it won’t look awkward. The crazy niece reaches her hands and presses your heads together, resulting in a better kiss. You want to laugh on how stupid everything is when your eyes wander to the back yard for a few moments and your heart stops: The Joker just sits there, staring at you with his mouth open, shocked, not even blinking and probably not breathing at this point.

“Fuck!” you whisper in low voice in Jonny’s ear, not that you need to keep it down with everyone whistling and clapping. “Don’t make any sudden moves, J is watching us. He’s outside.”

“Oh, crap!” Frost gets startled, believing he’s already dead and this is just an afterlife dream.

“Don’t move I said, he can smell fear,” you whisper again, and when you look one more time, J is gone.  “He’s not there anymore,” you sigh, worried, leaving Frost’s arms.

People start talking and asking you two questions in the same time, that’s why you don’t hear the doorbell ringing.

“Hey, Jonny, your best friend is here. He said you invited him to our party,” grandma’s voice resonates in the living room while introducing the green haired man to everyone.

“The youth today”, she thinks, displeased at his appearance but still smiling.

What scares Frost the most is The Joker’s wide smirk that doesn’t go well with the murderous sparkle in his blue eyes.
“Y-yes, I invited him.” Jonny nervously stutters. “Everyone… this is Jay.”

All the relatives introduce themselves, analyzing the new comer because he sure looks interesting to say the least. The younger girls snicker and elbow each other, really liking his clothes and the toned abs showing from under his almost completely unbuttoned purple shirt.

“He’s so hot,” you hear them whisper behind you and it makes you whimper, feeling sorry for them.  “If you only knew the devil that he is, little girls”, you have time to think before you see him heading over towards you and Frost.

“Well, well, well, bestie,” The Joker takes a deep breath and hugs Jonny. “Finally made it to the party, I didn’t want to miss on the fun.”

Frost panics but there is nothing he can do. People start mingling and talking, probably the main subject being the dude with the pale skin.

“Sir, I can explain,” he tries to start the conversation, not raising his voice on purpose because he doesn’t want the others to hear.

“What was that?” J turns his ear, sarcastically pretending not to hear.

“Baby, please, it was for the show, you know that,” you signal both of them to follow you to the other side of the room for a little bit more privacy. You sure hope he won’t explode soon.

“For the show??! What show?!” he pants, irritated, facing both of you when you reach the back wall.“You fucking kissed my girl Frost???? You dare touch what’s mine???!!!! Thank God I decided to follow you here and keep an eye on things. And look at what I have to deal with… Would you also like her in your bed???!” he snaps, cracking his neck and you know this is not good.

“N-no, boss, of course not, I swear!” Jonny starts to sweat from all the emotions he’s going through and none of them are pleasant.

“Baby, please, “you go and take his arm, trying to calm J down because the relatives are sure glancing towards your little group even if they pretend not to care.

Suddenly, someone’s kid, a boy around 6 years old comes and tugs on J’s pants, trying to get his attention.

“Mister Toxic, do you like my drawing?” he lifts up his hand with the paper, smitten with that wild hair color.

“Huh?” The Joker glares down at the child, confused and enraged about the other problem also.

“I think he refers to your toxic green hair, baby,” you pet his arm, hoping he won’t go insane.

“Get lost, kid!” J grumbles at the kid and the boy gasps, noticing his silver teeth.

“Waaahhhh, Mister Toxic, are those bullets ?!”

“Go away I said!” he wants to push the kid away and Jonny intervenes, yanking his arm and taking him to his parents because he knows it won’t end pretty if this continues.

“So,” the future groom playfully punches J’s shoulder, interrupting. “Are you going to be Jonny’s best man?” he chuckles. “Him and this pretty lady getting married, I bet you are excited as hell, am I right?”

If the Joker’s would have a detachable jaw, it would definitely be on the floor right now.

“Say what?!” he narrows his eyes, watching Frost coming back to you. “Jonny boy, I heard you’re getting married?” he snorts with murder in his mind and you are ready to do something if needed.

“J, it’s not like that and you know it,” you reply and the groom looks confused. Something seems very out of place.

“This is MY woman!!!!” he suddenly loses it, shouting so loud that everyone’s eyes turn towards your small group. He points at you, furious as hell:” SHE IS MINE and she has what she needs right here, do you hear me Frosty boy?” The Joker takes your right hand and places it on his crotch, holding it tight on the spot. You are at a loss of words and so is everyone else.

“Oh, dear Lord!”, “What the…?…”, “ Did he just…?” you hear people muttering and it pisses you off he dares to ruin everything with his childish, entitled and possessive behavior. AGAIN.

“Christ Almighty!” you see grandma making the cross symbol, horrified at the scene unfolding in front of her eyes.

You pull your hand away and in the heat of the moment you go and grab Frost’s crotch, taking him by surprise:
“He also has what I need right here, so there’s no difference!!!!” you yell, irritated to the maximum.

Grandma faints and falls to the ground with a loud thud, a few relatives rushing to her side.

“You…You son of a bitch!!!!!” The Joker unexpectedly charges at Jonny, punching his lights out before he can defend himself. “Let’s go!!!” he forcefully drags you after him, while the family steps aside, not wanting to mess with the crazy guest that looks like is going to kill them all.


“He also has what you need, huh?” J shoves you in his car, fastly blinking because he sees dark spots, that’s how enraged he is. “Nobody has what you need but me, is that clear Doll?!”

Needless to say he definitely proved his point once you got back to the penthouse. Think about the wild stuff he usually does to you times six. Maybe seven. You couldn’t wear high heels for a week because you couldn’t really feel your legs.

God, the things you have to go through for your best friend, but if you won’t, then who else will?

And, yes, if this was a movie, that heroic music would start playing again right about…NOW.

Also read- MASTERLIST:


My North Star (Pt 1)

Originally posted by fuckboyjohnny

Author’s Note: This is my first fanfic and I apologize for the mistakes I’m bound to make.

Genre: Fluff/Angst

Characters: Jin x Reader (ft Hoseok)

Word Count: 1357

Summary: You’ve been in love with your best friend for as long as you can remember. He’s been the one constant in your ever changing life, *until there’s a new girl in his life. (As if there isn’t many other fanfics with this same idea)

P.S. Jin isn’t even my bias BUT I just figured this concept in my head would fit better with Jin as the main. Enjoy peeps!

Life has a way of throwing curve balls at you. In fact, you didn’t know life as being calm. Your life was changing constantly, much to your chagrin. You never asked for these changes, especially since a lot of these changes weren’t good at all. 

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anonymous asked:

so i dont know if this opinion is valid or w/e but like, i feel like tumblr really dismisses the fact that anne boleyn ordered for mary to be abused. she was only seventeen when anne became queen, and was beaten and sworn at by the others at hatfield on orders from anne. i just think anne isn't as lovely as people make her out to be, and although i find her v interesting, i just think she is romanticized and made out to be some sort of angel? it seems as though the abuse mary got affected her.

i agree and acknowledge that the abuse mary endured at hatfield affected her; but i’m not certain it was at anne boleyn’s behest. i haven’t been able to find any primary sources that attest to that. from what i’ve read, what seems more likely is that it was at the behest of henry viii.

understandably, at first glance it seems logical that lady shelton, given that she was anne boleyn’s paternal aunt, may have been acting at her command. however, i find this less likely given that the two didn’t seem to like each other very much. if anne truly did encourage madge shelton (the lady anne boleyn-shelton’s daughter) to be the mistress of henry viii, as is speculated, her mother may not have taken too kindly to that! later, shelton is one of the ladies that attends on anne in the tower of london, and it was reported that anne said it was “a great unkindness in the king to set such about me as i have never loved” (the cited source for this is cavendish, and other than wikipedia i’ve been unable to find a more direct quote)

when henry visited the household of hatfield in january 1534, mary was ordered to stay in her chamber. thomas cromwell and the captain of the guard instead went to mary to urge her to renounce her title; which she refused. she asked to see him again; and was denied. instead she went out to the terrace at the top of the house as he prepared to leave. he bowed and touched his cap in response. however, he didn’t see her again for over two and a half years and it’s important to remember that he is the one that made that decision; not anne.

it was henry that ordered mary to serve elizabeth at hatfield as a punishment for refusing to publicly accept the acts of appeal and succession. it was henry who deprived mary of her personal staff, henry who denied mary permission to attend the funeral of katherine of aragon and refused to let her have a few objects of value from her mother.

lady shelton was, in fact, ordered to deliver this message to mary by henry viii, according to chapuys:

“The King, for his pains, told him he was not loyal to him, and that all he said was in behalf of the Princess’s desire to go to her mother; but he would take good care not to send her thither, for, the Queen being so haughty in spirit, she might, by favor of the Princess, raise a number of men, and make war, as boldly as did queen Elizabeth (Isabella) her mother. There was no thought of the King seeing the said Princess or sending her a word of consolation. On the contrary, word was sent by her gouvernante that he had no worse enemy in the world than her, and that she was the cause of mischief to the greater number of Christian princes, and the King declared publicly that her conduct was calculated to encourage conspiracy against him.

according to chapuys, anne even wrote to lady shelton herself asking to cease any ill treatment that might have occurred (or basically, at least not to push her further) and relates a copy of anne boleyn’s words:

Mrs. Shelton, my pleasure is that you do not further move the lady Mary to be towards the King’s Grace otherwise than it pleases herself. What I have done has been more for charity than for anything the King or I care what road she takes, or whether she will change her purpose, for if I have a son, as I hope shortly, I know what will happen to her; and therefore, considering the Word of God, to do good to one’s enemy, I wished to warn her before hand, because I have daily experience that the King’s wisdom is such as not to esteem her repentance of her rudeness and unnatural obstinacy when she has no choice. 

By the law of God and of the King, she ought clearly to acknowledge her error and evil conscience if her blind affection had not so blinded her eyes that she will see nothing but what pleases herself. Mrs. Shelton, I beg you not to think to do me any pleasure by turning her from any of her wilful courses, because she could not do me [good] or evil; and do your duty about her according to the King’s command, as I am assured you do.

the only source i’ve been able to find that’s said mary’s placement in hatfield at all was anne’s choice is alison weir’s the lady in the tower, saying anne ‘vindictively insisted she wait on her’…unfortunately, like a lot of weir’s nonfiction work, it provides no citation or source for this passage.

what makes me think that the mistreatment stemmed from henry is that it didn’t lessen after the execution of anne boleyn, but in fact worsened

“On 15th June 1536, King Henry VIII sent members of his council, led by Thomas Howard, 3rd Duke of Norfolk, to visit Mary at Hunsdon. The aim of the visit was to persuade Mary into accepting her father as supreme head of the Church in England, and acknowledging that she was not the legitimate heir to the throne. However, their idea of persuasion amounted to bullying. Eustace Chapuys, the imperial ambassador, recorded the visit of the council members in a letter to Emperor Charles V:

‘To induce her to obey his commands and accede to his wishes, the King sent to her a deputation composed of the duke of Norfolk, the earl of Sussex (Robert Radcliffe), the bishop of Chester (Roland Lee), and several others, whom she literally confounded by her very wise and prudent answers to their intimation. Upon which, finding that they could not persuade her, one of them said that since she was such an unnatural daughter as to disobey completely the King’s injunctions, he could hardly believe (said the interlocutor) that she was the King’s own bastard daughter. Were she his or any other man’s daughter, he would beat her to death, or strike her head against the wall until he made it as soft as a boiled apple; in short that she was a traitress, and would be punished as such. Many other threats of the same sort did the said deputies utter on the occasion, assisted in their task by the Princess’ governess, who happens to be the same as before, having then and there received orders not to allow the Princess to speak a word to any one, and to watch over her so that she should never be left alone by night or day.’”


the opinion is certainly valid, mine can mainly be summed up here. 

it’s rumored that instructions were given to lady shelton to ‘box mary’s ears’ if she refused to obey, and chapuys accredited the words to anne. but otherwise; i’ve read nothing to confirm it. 

because i’m aware of ives’ potential for bias (he greatly admires anne boleyn), i even looked for opinions from historians that seem to dislike her. g.w. bernard, who theorizes that anne was actually guilty of adultery, still says:

“all these accounts of humiliations and pressures that Mary was subjected to are readily believable, but whether Anne’s part in the them was quite as independent and as decisive as Chapuys suggested is open to some doubt: Henry may have been as responsible as Anne, perhaps more so.

i certainly don’t think anne is a saint; i know she had a lot of flaws. and it’s okay to find find her interesting but not necessarily like her– there are plenty of figures i, personally find interesting without necessarily liking…

anyways! i am curious about the sources from which you read mary ‘was beaten and sworn at by the others at hatfield on orders from anne’. if you’d like to come off anon, i swear i don’t bite– and i’d be interested to read them if you’re interested in sharing!  ❤️

We All Need A Good Gal Pal

*WARNING* This post is most likely going to be a bit soppy/sentimental. Obviously I’m gonna try and make it humorous but grab a bucket just in case…

That means you Moon.

So I’m sure many of you are aware that recently I took my first steps outside as Jess, and just over a year ago I also announced to my friends about my secretive (not so much now) hobby. 

As much as their support has been nothing short of fantastic, before all of that there was the original gal pal: Moon.

Now I could go on for decades about how useful she has been, but it’s probably more useful (and certainly more relevant) to let you know why she has been so important and instrumental in this transformation from ragged cave-man lookalike to the would-be-Queen that is Jessica Blaise.

1. Moon Don’t Lie To No Bitch

Moon has always been a good friend, even before she knew about Jess, but one quality I’ve found invaluable is her ability to tell me the truth, no matter what.

Moon do I look good in this?” Fuck no! That dress ain’t gonna work on you, you don’t have the boobs for it.

I think my makeup looks good today!” Yeah and some people think the world is flat, don’t make them right though does it?

Omg these heels are killer!” Yeah they do a good job at killing your fashion sense.

Call it harsh, call it hilarious… I call it honest feedback.

One of the best benefits of having a friend like Moon, and hopefully any gal pal, is that they’re looking out for your best interests. If I don’t look good in something, Moon will be the first person to let me know. She has my best interests at heart, and she wants me to look good just as much as I do.

2. What The Fuck Is Highlighter???

I know this one is probably quite obvious (and not actually that relevant to highlighting) but I feel it should be stated regardless.

Stop me if you guessed this already, but girls are really good at makeup.

And I don’t mean ‘Girls always use makeup of course they’re good at it.’ Nah.

Most girls, Moon included, don’t actually use anywhere near as much makeup as a crossdresser would (especially Moon with her bloody flawless skin… rude). It’s not about their actual skill will the makeup, it’s the knowledge and theory behind it.

What’s the use of concealer? Ask your gal pal.

How does highlighter work? Ask your gal pal.

Why shouldn’t I use dark colours on my lips? Ask your gal pal.

Regardless of how much or little your gal pal uses in terms of makeup, they will have a wealth of knowledge about it and will easily guide you into improving your makeup in no time. Plus it doesn’t hurt to have someone helping you while you’re applying the stuff you know nothing about…

3. Stand Properly! Have You Never Seen A Woman?

I might sound like this font of female imitation knowledge, but most of the tips I throw up on this blog are simply regurgitated information that I learned long ago from Moon. 

One of the most invaluable lessons she ever taught was simply how to stand like a woman.

I’ve said before that looking at women pose is a good way to learn how to take pictures, but this should only be used if all else fails. If you can (and I can’t recommend this enough), get a gal pal so instruct you how to stand.

It’s not uncommon for Moon to start lifting my arm into the right position or telling me to relax my shoulders. This is all stuff I’m aware of, but it’s better when you’ve got someone who can actually see what you’re doing wrong and correct it.

On top of all that, you also get someone who can help take photos. I mean, I’m a big fan of selfies but sometimes you just wanna feel like the god-damn model you were born to be.

Well, that’s my side of things. However just to make this post extra long (sorry…) I thought I should get Moon to weigh in her opinions of having a crossdresser for a friend.

What’s it like having a crossdresser for a friend?

I’ll be honest. It was a little different to start off with, especially since Jess is the first and only crossdresser I’ve ever met. It didn’t take me too long to get used to it though; eventually she was asking for me to join her on ‘dress up nights’ which was essentially a cheap, student excuse to get drunk and look pretty… always fun though!

What’s different about Jess’ makeup than other girls?

Well… nothing really. I guess that’s the point though. She has to apply a bit more of the base makeup (concealer, foundation etc.) but after that it’s quite similar to my own and other girl’s makeup routines.

Do you see Jess differently when she’s dress up?

Again, a bit at first. Not in a bad way of course, but it was just getting my head around a male friend suddenly looking female(ish). I don’t know if it’s gotten easier over time because she’s better at makeup now than 8 years ago or because I’ve just got used to it.Overall I don’t really see her as a different person, just a much prettier person.

What’s your favourite thing to do with Jess?

Dressing up; without a doubt. As much as certain outfits don’t work on Jess (or myself at times) we’re always pushing each other to try different outfits. It’s always a great accomplishment when we try on an outfit we didn’t think would work but does!

Also Jess always has fancy dress outfits, and they’re nothing short of hilarious to try on, regardless of who’s wearing them.

I just wish she wouldn’t get changed in front of me…

What has been your favourite moment with Jess?

Oh god… we’ve been doing this for 8 years now, there are way too many…

If I had to pick one, even though there are definitely more, I would say the time that Jess wanted me to record a video of her spinning in a dress but I started recording while she was still explaining and sorting herself out.

Yeah, that’s the one.

I think I’m making these longer on purpose now…

I hope this has helped any of you who are thinking about telling your friends or looking for some guidance.

Just remember: any good gal pal will have no problem with you crossdressing over than those heels don’t work with that dress Hun.

Message me if you have any questions!

- Jessica Blaise x x

anonymous asked:

you're "same room thinking mikael x even and jonas x isak" au- so after it's revealed that no one is in fact dating each other jonas and mikael meet up and are like "so we're setting these two idiots up right? i swear to god if i have to listen to anymore pining i'm gonna scream" and then they like make sure the boys both get locked out of the building one night or something

Anonymous said:viki,, the au u just posted but imagine: they gotta share a bed as well

i hope its no trouble that i put these together but!!! its a few days after that night, even and isak have been talking more since then, and mikael and jonas decide to get high on the bed mikael and even share on purpose and they blame the weed when its late at night but neither of them want to move so isak and even are forced to share the other bed and the whole “which side do u want to sleep on?” “its whatever” “no but. choose one” “idk, which one do u want” “idk u choose” goes on for like 5 minutes before even just gives up and picks a side and gets under the blanket then isak lies down turning away from even, and he pushes the blanket off of himself and evens like “its gonna get cold during the night” and isaks just like “nah its okay i have enough body warmth” and even raises his eyebrows but leaves him at that. and like half an hour later isak is still wide awake bc of the closeness of even and he suddenly feels even move and the blanket is gently placed on him and he’s trying to act like he’s asleep and it seems to work and he thinks he’s cool but a moment later even is snuggling up to him and isaks heart is literally in his throat????? and evens arm is loosely thrown around isaks waist and isaks holding his breath but when even buries his face into the back of his neck he just. exhales and lets himself relax into his touch and a few more quick heartbeats later he finally falls asleep. the next morning he wakes up to his face only inches away from even’s, both their arms on each others waists, evens breaths hitting his lips and isak doesnt move and just. looks at even sleeping and he wants to touch his face so bad, stroke his cheek, kiss his nose. and he’s so deep in his thoughts he barely notices when even opens his eyes but does just in time so he can close his own and he feels evens thumb rub at his hipbone gently before its gone and even is standing up. and they dont talk about it for the rest of the day but isak blushes every second he sees even or just thinks about him and mikael and jonas low five under the table and when the night comes none of them ask any questions, jonas is getting in to bed next to mikael when he’s done showering and its just a silent agreement from then on and by like the third night like that, all four of them are more relaxed and they talk in the dark until 1am and isak is half asleep when he hears the boys say good night to each other and feels evens lips ghosting over his shoulder as he whispers “good night isak” and isak just takes evens hand and intertwines their fingers and evens smile is pressing against isaks skin and its just. perfect

anonymous asked:

have you ever considered making jimin smut fic in chapters? always love your work! a big fan

I’d love to write a longer fic for Jimin… I’m just waiting for the right idea to come along. 

Originally posted by sweaterpawsjimin

In the meantime, I’ll just write what I currently have inspiration for.  That’s pretty much true for all the members.

People tell me all the time that if I believed in God, I’d be more hopeful. But, honestly, I disagree.

It helps me to know that my current struggle is not divine punishment.

It helps me to know that my current struggle was not intentionally thrown at me to “test” me.

It helps me to know that no cruel entity made the world like this on purpose.

It helps me to know that no indifferent entity is ignoring my cries for help.

It helps me to know that the only person who made my life like this, and the only one who can make it better, is me.

I’ve been wanting to talk about the themes of enlightenment & salvation in rogue one (along with the force & hope) for a really long time, and I think I have the words to explain what I’m thinking now so here goes: 

As a Hindu (a religion star wars has been inspired by) one of the common themes I’ve noticed is how enlightenment works. One of the main ideas is that anyone in any situation can be salvaged in the end (ie. redemption. Like how Anakin rises to the light in ROTJ). Some people, are dedicated believers their entire lives (see: Chirrut in the Force, Cassian in the Rebellion). Some lose faith but regain it in the end (see: Baze in the Force, Jyn in the Rebellion). 

The moment this really clicked for me was Cassian and Bodhi’s arcs in particular, but it works really well for the others too. 

Bodhi’s arc is pure poetry for this, mainly because of his name choice (which I’ve mentioned before): it literally means ‘enlightened/awakened one’. It’s more prevalent in Buddhism (which admittedly I’m not as familiar with) but it’s a Sanskrit word why I’m so glad he’s played by a south asian. Bodhi’s main struggle is within himself: self doubt. He grows throughout the film (his enlightenment is when he defects, then he faces a series of trials, and he’s at peace in the end). (“Bodhi had only ever doubted himself” to “He’d done enough. It was okay.”) His struggle is two-fold: he feels like he needs to right a wrong (his time spent with the Empire - “praying that he had found his salvation at last”) and also prove himself/his capability. It’s why he’s so easily crippled by everything that goes wrong (ex. every rebel that dies, Jedha’s destruction “it’s too late”) because he takes it personally/as his own failure (he should’ve been faster in delivering the message). However in the end, he’s both righted his wrong and is at peace (fulfilled Galen’s mission - he didn’t fail him.). 

Cassian’s arc is really beautiful as well. He dutifully serves the greater good, but takes an emotional toll in the process (he loses a part of himself for every life he takes). Are sinners allowed to achieve eternal peace? Religion says yes and the Force agrees with me. It’s really well done in the novelization: Cassian’s stuck in a mental prison (possibly as a sinner, but there’s a phrase we use: “the prison of the flesh” ie. mortal life - the whole purpose of life is to not be reborn) and he is seeking redemption (enlightenment). It’s why he saves Jyn so many times against his instinct (though he doesn’t realize it). It’s why he doesn’t shoot Galen. It’s what drives him (and the other rebels) to volunteer so easily for Jyn’s suicide mission (this is really clear in the novel) - they see it as an opportunity for redemption. It’s like the Rebellion is his religion and Jyn helps him to his salvation. What greater sacrifice is there than self-sacrifice?? Cassian is the pinnacle of the concept. And so, on the beaches of Scarif, he’s freed from his prison (or as we like to call it, the burden of life). 

In terms of literal religion, we can compare Baze and Chirrut. Chirrut is the ideal believer, he trusts in the Force more than anything. (His faith is why he didn’t get killed when he went to pull the master switch. But after, he realizes his work here is done, and no longer has the will to live. unlike padme cough cough That’s why he dies.) So of course he will become one with the Force. He’s completely at peace. There’s no question. I’m so glad they made a Chinese actor play him. But Baze? We don’t really know really when or why he goes from a Guardian to a non-believer. But in those moments after Chirrut’s death, he become a believer again. And that’s what counts (Hinduism is really big on this. No matter your past is, redemption is possible. Like Anakin!). He become one with the Force.

Jyn’s a little harder to describe. She falls out of love with life after being abandoned so many times and doesn’t have a purpose other than her own survival. She sees political opinions as a luxury (which in this case, is true for a different reason. Jyn’s the one who has the luxury of not choosing a side. People like Cassian did something about it because they had to.) Somewhere after Galen’s death and Cassian’s attempt to knock some sense into her (and this is my only issue with rogue one - we don’t actually know how or when Jyn decides to be the champion of the cause, but it’s sometime after Eadu and before they get back to the base) Jyn finds her life’s purpose. This is really well done in the novelization, it’s described as the mental cave in her mind (modeled after the cave on Lah’mu) and how it’s broken open with light on Scarif. That’s her salvation.

I hope all of this made sense so far.

Salvation in Hinduism is almost always described as “the person stepped into/were enveloped in a bright light, and attained true peace/became one with god”. In star wars terms, they become one with the Force. 

What I noticed while watching the movie is “Why does everyone die in great big bursts of light?”. It only clicked after reading the novel and seeing how important it was that everyone died at peace, and became ‘one with the force’. To back this up just take a look at everyone’s death scenes (now that we have gifs of them). Bodhi goes in a flash of light, so does Baze (and Chirrut). Even Galen’s face is illuminated when he dies.

Originally posted by fitzsimmonsy

Especially these two:

Originally posted by dailyrebelcaptain

The visual of them literally being surrounded with light, becoming one with the Force, screams salvation. Redemption. (and according to the novel, they’re both at peace, chains broken and free of burden). 

I’d never thought tragic endings for characters could be beautiful, but rogue one proved me wrong. 

(I’m done, but I also want to talk about hope. Someone last weekend told me “hinduism is a religion of hope. you can live however you want, but in the end, as long as you do the right thing, you’ll be at peace.” I’ve always thought the same about star wars. It’s a story of hope. Of hope the good in the world universe (or literally, the good in Anakin, that he is redeemable). It’s about hope being passed on (quite literally: the stretch of rogue one from Chirrut moving the master switch to the plans landing in Leia’s hands is so. beautiful. for this reason. Leia is more than right: the plans are Hope, they’ve traveled between so many hands hoping that they’ll get to the right place, willing to die just for this little disk of hope (some of them not even knowing what it is). Hope is what gives the rebels this strength, while fear himself - Vader- is killing them all.

Hope - belief in anything - is the strongest thing there is.)

because my darling friend @luciansunshine isn’t feeling well and needed some fluff!!!! i hope you feel better sweetie!!

inspired by a post by @chocoblondie that talked about promptis eskimo kisses uwu it had to happen~

(please forgive any mistakes it is now time for me to sleeeeeeeeeeep)


Prompto was lounged across Noctis’s lap in the one seated couch, his legs hanging over his thighs and his fingers thoroughly laced within those of his Prince. It wasn’t often that they sat in silence with one another, given the lack of time any of them had anymore. Not only did they tend to fill their spare time with video games or music, but school had been rough on the both of them, assignments and upcoming exams monopolising any spare time they had. Noctis had also been called to the Citadel more than once in previous weeks. Why, he did not tell Prompto, but assured him it wasn’t anything to worry about. Still, Prompto continued to worry. He’d seen footage of the King, relying on a cane and brace and refused to believe there wasn’t something deeper going on, that Noctis wasn’t telling him.

Sighing, Noctis untangled one hand from Prompto’s in favour of grazing his fingertips along the blond’s smooth jaw, then back up and ghosting over his ear to brush through silken hair. Prompto leaned into the touch, eyes closing, eyelashes casting a little shadow across freckled cheeks. He didn’t need to convince anyone that Prompto was beautiful – except Prompto, on a regular basis – his best friend gaining the attention of more than one classmate since they’d entered high school. He was beautiful enough that when his father had found out about what they had, he’d asked – embarrassingly so – if the infatuation was to do with the likeness to Lunafreya. But, to his delight, his father also accepted and supported them. It is natural to want affection, he had said, and to give it in return.

Noctis tilted his head, angling his mouth against the junction where Prompto’s ear met the line of his jaw and felt the blond relax even further into his lap. He kissed along the skin, over star-dusted cheek bones, to his nose and finally his mouth, soft presses of lips and nothing more. Sweet, gentle, shy, everything their relationship had been. Neither knew where to take their physical affections and neither really wanted to advance to the kind of activity that Ignis had sat them down to warn them about. It had left them red faced in each others company for several days before they’d finally talked about it one-on-one. Prompto… he wasn’t ready yet. And that was fine, Noctis was more than willing to sit back and let it happen when it did.

Hands threaded through his hair and Noctis let out a soft sound of appreciation, breaking the kiss to stare fondly into delighted blue eyes, the tint of violet ever present, ever beautiful. Foreheads rested against one another as they beamed like lovestruck idiots at one another – or, perhaps it was a fitting description of what they were. In the fresh, first few months of their relationship.

With a sigh of bliss, Noctis let his nose brush against Prompto’s, a thoughtless act, unplanned, unintentional, but it drew a soft giggle out of the blond and Noctis considered himself intrigued. He’d seen others do eskimo kisses before, had felt them from his own parents, in all their playful and affectionate ways. He wondered for a moment if Prompto had ever felt one before. He didn’t bother to ask.

He did it again, this time with purpose, brushing the tips of their noses together and enjoying the lilted laugh that burst from Prompto’s chest, body squirming in the small space of the couch. Noctis held him firm and did it again. And again.

And as long as Prompto produced laughter like that, he’d continue until the end of his days.

Title: The first time is the best

Fandom: Riverdale

Ship: Jughead Jones X Betty Cooper; bughead

Rating: Smut (tish?), R, Humor

Summary: Betty and Jughead’s first time

Disclaimer: I own nothing except the story

Notes: This is only slightly smutty, not meant to offend or trigger anyone. Oh, and also, I thought I’d challenge myself a bit so I wrote this without any descriptions whatsoever, just dialogue. Comments are welcome! And please be kind.

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