biggest regret of our lives | c.h | part 4
so, this was requested to be continued! i hope you like it :)
**trigger warning - it has a little violence in it, not too much. but i thought i should warn you just in case you feel a little unease at it.**
“what are you saying, Y/N?” Calum’s lips quivered as he fought back the smile that so desperately wanted to show.
you exhaled deeply, processing your words carefully. is this really what you want, to leave with Calum and pretend this entire marriage to another man isn’t actually happening.
“i can’t marry him. i’d be living a lie if i did.” you gripped onto Calum’s hands, keeping your eyes on the ground to avoid him spotting any sign of doubt in them.
you felt his hands loosen from yours, catching you off guard at his sudden lack of enthusiasm. “Y/N, is this really what you want?” his voice was calm, but you could just hear the hurt behind his strong composure. it was a quick decision that you had pretty much just made up on the spot, it was the thought of losing him completely that made you want him that little bit more.
he took your silence as the answer he dreaded. exhaling loudly, he took a hold of your hand once more, his thumb grazing your flesh gently. “i know you love me. but right now, it’s obvious you need time to think about all of this. i want you to be sure that this is what you really want.”
the tears formed in your eyes once more as they met his, but he was right, you needed to think about everything. running away sounded like a great idea at the time, but this is reality and right now you have a man at home who thinks you’re getting married.
“okay.” your voice croaked, but it was clear to understand that it was agreed that you should keep your distance from each other until you’ve made up your mind.
the car ride home gave you enough time to compose yourself before you headed inside to a man you had no feelings for. with that in mind, you still had no idea of how you were to explain that you didn’t want to marry him because there’s another man. it was hard enough just thinking about how your friends and family were going to react.
as you pulled up in the driveway, you gave yourself a little breather before planning out the words in your mind. god knows what you will do after you’ve told him, do you pack up your stuff and leave or do you stay.
“there you are, i’ve been calling you.”
you slipped your hand into your pocket, pulling out the phone. “battery died, sorry.” you faked a smile.
“oh! no problem. i made you-”
“we need to talk.” you interrupted him before you lost the confidence to tell him the truth.
you avoided eye contact, staring down at your feet as you played with the phone in your hands nervously. you could feel the tension climbing as silence fell in the house.
“Y/N? is everything okay?” he asked, becoming more concerned.
“i can’t marry you.”
your eyes finally met his, as his narrowed and stared blankly at you, you couldn’t tell if he was hurt or if he was confused at the situation.
“you’re not serious, are you?” he chuckled, trying to ease the tension.
looking him dead in the eye, you nodded slowly. “i’m in love with someone else.”
“are you fucking kidding me right now?” his calm voice soon turned cold and bitter, as his eyes stared at you furiously. you had never seen him this angry before, just his stare alone made you feel slightly uncomfortable.
throwing his hands up in the air, he laughed coldly. “oh, you’re sorry? sorry that you’re a lying bitch? or sorry that you’ve completely ruined something that could have been perfect?”
“i didn’t do this on purpose! i was living a lie with you, i thought i loved you but it was in love with the idea of finally being happy!” you raised your voice to stand your ground against him, in the hopes that he’d ease up a little.
turning away from you, he gripped onto his hair, laughing like this was all some sick game of yours. “you’re a real piece of work, you know that?”
“what’s that supposed to mean?”
“it means that you’re a fucking bitch, because we have spent months! planning this, and i went along with everything you said, we paid for everything, we made sure everything was exactly how you wanted it and now you’re telling me that you don’t love me?”
you turned your attention away from him, avoiding his eye contact once more, but that just infuriated him more.
“look at me!”
his sudden closeness uneased you, as you stared back into his eyes.. how was it possible that someone who is so calm and loving could look so cold and cruel.
with your back against the wall, he leaned his hands on either side of you, making him that bit more intimidating. “who is he?” his voice was low, but the anger was still there.
“you don’t know him..” you lied, hoping he’d leave it there.
“who. is. he.” he raised his voice once more.
“you don’t want to know.”
he slammed his hand against the wall beside your head, causing you to jump at the sound, with his face closer to yours, you felt the tears forming in your eyes. “calum.” you muttered out, closing your eyes.
you felt him back off from you, his eyes dropped to the ground as his brows furrowed. “my best friend, Calum?”
staying away from him, you let him pace back and forth, muttering words under his breath. in this moment you’d rather him do that be up in your face again, you had never seen him like this and in all honesty it was terrifying.
“how long?” he finally spoke up.
“how long what?” you asked, a little confused at where this was going.
“how fucking long have you been in love with him?”
he knew you and Calum had a past, but you assured him that it was over a long time ago, another lie you told yourself each day.
“i never fell out of him with him”
his pacing stopped, as he stared back at you, the anger and hurt radiated off of him. his eyes remained locked on you, but there was no expression on his face, he was giving no sign of what he could do next.
“was you with him before? is that why you were home late?”
“that doesn’t matter..” you stepped closer to him, holding your hands up to him.
“was you with him?” he asked once more, the anger rising in his voice.
“yes.” you stepped back again, keeping your eyes on him to make sure you didn’t miss any of his movement. “we talked, about everything.”
“did he tell you to leave me? or did you think of that all on your own.”
becoming uncomfortable with his questions, you shook your head, folding your arms over your torso. his eyes fluttered shut, as his breathing became louder and firmer. you could sense he was getting frustrated once more, but you stood your ground knowing he’d never really hurt you. but that didn’t stop you from being frightened.
“look, we can stand here all night and argue back and forth about this. but the truth is, there’s nothing we can do. i’m so sorry that you had to find out about this. i never meant to hurt you.”
with nothing but silence between you, you figured he’d calmed down and was ready to really talk about what would happen next. but as you neared closer to him, he backed off, turning away from you again. his fist met the wall, causing you to jump once more.
“i’m gonna fucking kill him.” pushing past you, he swung open the door, your heart raced in your chest as you chased after him down the garden path.
“no!” you screamed after him, running in front of him you pushed your hands into his chest. “please, we can talk about this, please don’t do anything you’ll regret.”
you thought you had managed to stop him as he stood in one place, your eyes met his, but he wasn’t looking at you. you turned your head to see Calum stood across the street, his eyes were narrowed as he took in the sight of you both.
“what’s going on?” he asked, crossing the street to you.
“Calum, you shouldn’t be here.” you wiped the tears from your face, but that only made him more concerned.
“come to collect your prize?”
Calum met the glare of his best friend, confused at first until he caught onto what was happening.
“look, mate. we didn’t want to hurt you.” Calum held up in his hands in surrender. with you stood in between them, you hoped it wouldn’t break out into a fight, knowing too well that none of them would want to cause you any harm.
“you know, i don’t know what hurts more. the fact that my best friend would do this to me, or the fact that the woman i love would choose another man over me.”
Calum’s eyes furrowed, tensing his jaw he was becoming a little angry at the way he was talking. like it was all a big joke to him.
“i love her.”
you looked up to Calum, before quickly turning your attention back to this bitter shell of man you thought you knew. squaring up to Calum, he glared into his eyes. “must have been so hard for you sit back and let me fuck the girl you love, every night.”
Calum was becoming more infuriated by the minute, his hands clenching into fists as he stared back at him. “emphasis on every night.”
“stop it.” you raised your voice.
he laughed in Calum’s face, treating him like one big joke. “fuck you.” Calum muttered.
“guys, come on. we can go inside and talk about this like adults”
before you could even get a word in, Calum had swung for him, his fist meeting his face causing him to fall backwards into the fence. “you’re gonna regret that.”
he swung for Calum, pushing him down to the ground, swinging for him a few more times before Calum pushed him off bringing him above him to get in a few more hits for himself.
you pleads for them to stop were just echoes in the wind, as they made no effort to stop. the pair were now rolling on the floor, each hit to the face sounding more painful than the last. you couldn’t make out who’s blood was who’s until they fell apart and panted.
blood streamed down from Calum’s nose, as he wiped it with the back of his hand. “you don’t deserve her.” he spoke between breaths.
standing up, he glared at Calum before looking back to you, seeing the pain in your eyes brought him to become worried for your safety. “oh yeah? look at her… you really think she loves seeing any of us like this?”
Calum turned his attention to you, the tears were streaming down your cheeks, as you stood and looked at them both, shaking your head.
“Y/N..” he whispered.