i hope at least have someone want it

Overload

pairing: connor murphy x reader

word count: 2500

warnings: swearing, porn mention (???)

summary: you’re feeling particularly angry this morning and connor’s willing to do anything to try and make you feel better.

a/n: is this completely self indulgent? yes. did i write this because i was having jaw pain and wished someone was there to kiss it and make me feel better? yes. so of course i picked my baby connor to make me feel better when i was adamently furious - hope he’ll help with some of you guys, too, or at least make you feel a bit fuzzy!!! i didnt proofread this bc i wanted to get it up so ignore any mistakes or hmu with them if they bother you enjoy! <3


You slammed the door of your locker shut and, when you turned your head, practically jumped when you saw Connor beside you, dripping with rain water and looking particularly unhappy to be at school.

“Fuck, Connor,” you mumbled, your eyes trailing from his feet to his face. “Why didn’t you say something?”

Connor’s eyes furrowed together in the middle of his forehead and he frowned, crossing his arms over his chest. “I thought you noticed me walk up and were just ignoring me.”

You shook your head. “I obviously didn’t see you.”

As you hoisted your backpack higher up on your shoulders, you watched Connor take a small step towards you and flickered your gaze to match his. His body was morphing into his protective, ready-to-fuck-someone-up stance – he always stood like that when he thought someone at school had pissed you off.  “Everything alright?”

Sighing, you nodded. “Great,” you answered firmly, turning on your heel and moving down the hallway.

Keep reading

dennislesbian  asked:

listen I'm a lesbian and I grew up as a Catholic. I'm not a Catholic anymore but I can relate to the way Mac grew up (in the faith and guilt stuff), and I've been pretty much closeted for years and I'm still not out to my family... somehow I relate to both Mac and Dennis because of this stuff, and since I'm pretty lonely and have never been in a relationship with a girl I just really want them to be happy at least? you know?

i get it dude :/ and yeah as someone who’s literally never been in a relationship with anyone i just want to see these 2 find happiness in each other to give me hope that one day i’ll be happily out too 🙃

3

🎉 Happy Killugon Day!!!!! 🎉 I’ve been working on a school au (thanks to talks with @pemprika​..!! PLEASE LOOK AT HER SCHOOL AU STUFF THEYRE PERFECT) and this was a lot of fun to do!! oh yea I also added a little bit of context in the captions of what I was thinking about when drawing the scene ahaha;;

 I hope everyone is having a good killugon day!! 💚 💙

Captain

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count: 3,610

Request: OMG I’m so happy to see that the requests are open again! I want to say that I LOVE your writing and I was wondering if you could do a Steve x reader smut where they have a strained relationship but then they have to share a bed during an undercover mission and that leads to sex, possibly with rough/Dom!Steve after all the tension (maybe they had to pretend they were a couple for the mission or something). Feel free to change this if you want I trust your writing genius :)

Warnings: Smut, Dom!Steve, hair pulling, captain kink, dirty talk, orgasm denial, light spanking, light choking, oral sex, swearing, Steve is a little tease

Author’s Note: I’d like to again dedicate this one to @scarlets-wanda, who tried to sneak the fact that it was her birthday last week past me! So in return, I wrote this for her. Enjoy.

Originally posted by ohevansmycaptain


Keep reading

getting married on Halloween would be great because
1) never have to worry about forgetting the anniversary
2) forget formal wear, guests should arrive in costumes
3) pumpkin pie wedding cake???
4) also I’d want to toss a pumpkin instead of a bouquet. just a whole pumpkin. just freakin launch that sucker behind my head. get wrecked

2

Yurio Plisetsky, прима-балерина.

This is how I imagine him.

“Both men and women should feel free to be strong. It is time that we all perceive gender on a spectrum not as two opposing sets of ideals”, by Emma Watson.

I want to use this drawing to say a few things I’ve been thinking lately. I don’t care if it ends up with 1 note or more, I just want to rant about it. I hope I won’t offend anyone with my lack of english and knowledge. 

  • Boys can wear make up. And skirts. Boys can change their hair, use it long or short. Boys can have no hair too. Boys won’t be less boys for that. 
  • When I draw I don’t think about genders, about sexuality, about anything to be honest. When I draw I think about making people happy, it makes me happy when someone smiles what I did because ehy maybe they are having a bad day and at least I made them 1% happier. I’m aware my art is not the best so if you dislike it, it’s okay. If you have any critic my ask is full open I’ll hear you and thank you for pasing by (for real). But if you dislike it because you thought that was a girl and become aware it’s actually a boy and you find it wrong or offensive, then Jeez, I have no words man, more than: I can’t believe it, what kind of civilization is this?
  • I don’t know what I am, I don’t care what I am but, from the bottom of my heart. I’m really sorry some of you are living hell because of this fucking nonsense world, 
  • You are beautiful, trust me. 
  • You are strong. You will be fine. And,
  • you are not alone. 
Imagine : Being Hope Mikaelson’s Twin and Kol blames the Family for constantly ignoring you (part 3)

I AM STILL CRYING ABOUT LOOSING THIS DAMN PART. SWEAR SOMEONE SAY SOMETHING BAD ABOUT THIS PART I WILL STOP WRITING THIS SERIES


Part 2 :  http://nightgirl250.tumblr.com/post/154484517050/imagine-being-hope-mikaelsons-twin-and-kol


Part 1 : http://nightgirl250.tumblr.com/post/153920428680/imagine-being-hope-mikaelsons-twin-and-kol?is_related_post=1



tagged queens: 

@thejulietfarciertlove @meggleangelo (tell me if you want to become one)



___________________________________________________________



Young!Reader x Uncle!Kol, Young!Reader x Father!Klaus, Young!Reader x Uncle!Elijah





I took a deep breath as the cold air pricked my skin. * why is it so fucking cold *. I pull my jacket closer to my body as the wind blows down the school hallway. “Hurry up Y/n,” my friends Jason and Kara say waiting for me at the gym door. We were heading to the gym since we have to go talk to our gym coach about the pacer test along with meet Hope. ^ Whoopee!^


“Slow down guys remember crouches,” I say tilting my head to the crutches in my hands. “Sorry Black Canary,” says Jason using my nicknames while scratching the back of his head as I finally catch up with them. “It’s fine to let’s just go before lunch ends I am hungry,” I said as we head into the gym when I remembered my plan. I still need to give Jason and Kara the goodbye letters. *Oh yeah soon I won’t see them for as long as they think we will. At least now I won’t be able to bother them anymore. Jason won’t have to wait for me at the end of the street so we could talk. And he could go out with Hope like he wanted to. Kara would have less competition when it comes to ballet tryouts. I am doing them a solid they don’t need to baby me anymore. No one will not even myself* I thought. *The voices will stop no more looking at the knife, in lust. Or wanting to kill someone, along with dreams of torture*. ^Yeah honey like we said your end is the end^. I felt like screaming as the Voice poisonous sound rings through me.


“Hey are you ok, ” asks Kara. “Yeah don’t worry about it I am just thinking about something,”.^More like hearing something, but don’t worry it will end soon just remember the goodbye^.

“Hey if you guys don’t see me for a while, remember that I love you guys ok, “I said not looking at them to see their faces.

“What do you mean are you going somewhere ?” Said Kara frantic, she was always caring for me but if you annoy her too long she will fight you in a heartbeat. “No nothing major just you know visiting some family for a while, ” I said as Jason goes to talk to out gym coach for us while we talk. ^family on the other side^

“But why all your family lives in New Orleans?”She asked. “No not all of them I have am Aunt who lives in Maryland,”I lie.^Ooohh lying you your best friend when you know it’s your last time to see her how pityful^

“How long is a while? Wait are you sure cause Hop–”


“Look it doesn’t matter what Hope says or doesn’t I am nor Hope nor will I ever be.  I am just going away for some time and to answer your how long question. I am not sure but I will come back ok?” I lie. *Thou I hate lying to them it is necessary for their own good. She doesn’t need to know, I am just a burden her parents don’t even like me as they prefer Hope. Once again Hope wins The Voices in my head win. But soon it won’t matter I am ending this soon maybe in the next life I will be happier. *


“Plus I am going cause of family issues something happened with Hope and they think it’s best I go away for a while. just for two weeks,“ I said then took out her letter. ” Here in two days open this letter if I don’t tell you everything that’s going on OK? But you gotta promise me that you won’t tell Jason, I will tell him later on in the day okay.“ She nodded. I wanted to tell her more. Tell her everything but I knew if I did then she would try to convince me not too which wouldn’t help anyone.


“Hey,” said Jason poking my cheek and breaking me from my thoughts. “Huh,” I turn to face then but both of then have confusion written on their face.“Sorry just thinking of when we are going for the trip,” I said acting excited.


“Are you sure?” said Kara death staring me in the eyes and poking my chest. “Yes, Kara I am 100% sure now stop poking me,” I said moving away from her so she nor Jason can poke me. Jason frowns while Kara fake cries. “Oh hey guys,” said Hope as she joins us. We haven’t talked ever since she came into my room last week, which I am grateful for but sadly she decided to hang out with Kara, and Jason. I don’t get how someone can be so fake. She acts like we never had a problem with each other in the first place.*^I do it’s just like how you’re being fake about killing yourself^ Ignoring the voice to best I can I focus on what it in front of me. Jason and Kara are laughing at some joke Hope said. *Jason, kara I am going to miss you two so much but this is for your own good you guys can’t be doing this to you guys, pulling you into my life no point punishing you guys for my sins and mistakes.* I thought.^Yet here you are still in their lives hurry up ^ 


“Yeah I  just a lot on my mind,” I said leaning onto him. Jason, Kara and I always had this kind of relationship. Always caring and supporting each other.  *It doesn’t matter now does it. It’s too later be thinking about that, not like things will get better or something.* I thought as we were about to enter the cafeteria when Kara was called for early dismissal.^finally your thinking like me so why don’t you finish it ^ I felt like another person was in the room whispering this in my ears, but guess what I am falling for it.

I pull Kara in for a hug, not a side hug like I normally do but a full one. I take in her scent as she wraps her arms around me. She smells like strawberries and banana. I felt happy in her arms as her body heat radiates onto me.I felt at peace, nothing could make me mad, or want to cry, the bad thoughts went away. I was at peace and happy, but like all good stuff, it must come to an end  "See you tomorrow,“ she said as we let go then ran off. I felt tears prick my eyes. “Come Canary time food,” Jason puts his arm around me as we went over to the lunch line.^Yeah get your last meal before you pass^ said Voice, might as well give it a name since it will with me till my end.


——————————-Time skip bros end of the school day ———————


I took a deep breath as I walk over to the outside bench with Jason, my crush, behind me. “Hey, are you OK?” He said as he places our stuff down and takes a seat. “ Yeah Just haven’t been getting the best sleep,” I sorta lie.^liar liar death on fire ^


The truth is that I try not to sleep at all and use coffee creamer to stay up planning my end and writing my goodbye letters. Half of my goodbyes are finished. And I already choose the outfit I am going to wear. Just cause I am going to die doesn’t mean I cannot be happy as I do it. But mostly it’s because at night I have nightmares and I wake up screaming which annoys the living hell out of everyone at home, one way to not annoy them is to not sleep ya know.


“So when do you want me to come over for Ms.Greene’s. Project ?”

“Oh right about that—”. ^You can’t cause I am going to kill myself ^ I shake my head trying to get those word out of my head.


“Let me guess I can’t cause of family issues and you cannot come to my house cause Your not allowed out the house for reasons your not telling me,” he said. I felt guilty for leaving him hanging so much lately. We have been best friends since pre-k. We used to play with the building blocks as Marcel would take us to the playground. I sigh as Jason rubs the back of his neck.”What is up with you ever since Kara and I have been hanging out with Hope and you got your leg hurt you have just been so distant


“Look Jason I know I normally tell you everything but honestly. I think I just need some space,” I said. I grew cold with every word I said to him. I am not sure if it was because of the cold but I knew it was most likely for the best. ^You’re going to die soon don’t make it harder for us ^ said Voice in my head.


“So are you still gonna come to my basketball game today after school right?” His eyes lighted. I  wanted to yes so I can see crush the  other team.“ No, I won’t I got to head to the Quarter house,” I said to him. His smile disappears from his face.


“B-but you always come to them so we can have Ice cream,” I take a deep breath .*I wish we could do that forever * I thought as I took his hand in mine  "Look Jason I know we always do that but I can’t this time —“


“Ahh  Y/n there you are.  ” I said Uncle Elijah and Hope. I quickly let go of Jason’s hand and put my hands on my crutches. * shoot I forgot Uncle Elijah was picking me and Hoe I mean Hope up* I thought as Jason picks up his books. I opened my mouth to talk him but he was already walking away. “I will finish Ms.Greene’s  project on my own. let you have some Space,” he spat out the words like daggers then disappeared in the distance between us.


I place my stuff in my backpack, slipped it on and went to Uncle Elijah and Hope beginning our trek to the house.


I pull out my iPod and headphones and start listening to ‘work out’ by j cole. He is one of Jason and I favorite singers. We walked together for thirty-five minutes before Uncle Elijah actually talks to me. Hope is on Uncle Elijah back since she got tired ten minutes ago from walking.

*honestly Uncle Elijah the Little shit can walk on her own  * I thought and continued walking thinking about Jason and I’s relationship if still even have one after today. ^what is there to think about it’s over and you ruined it ^ I felt my heart churn at her voice. *shut it voice*

———————————————————————————————————————-

It’s been two hours since we got home and so far, it’s just been Mom and sperm donner yelling at each other about something that is most likely about Hope or some ‘new enemy ’. I sigh as hear another vase slams my door again. *Uncle Elijah going to yell * I thought. At first, when they occurred I was scared out of my mind, but now I am used to it it doesn’t matter.


^Honestly, what is there for me to worry about. I am not gonna be here in the future so I am fine Right? Why don’t you just pick up a knife and slit your throat no one will notice your dead until the deed is done^. I hugged my pillow closer to my chest and pushed the hollow feeling into the back of my mind. I found these thoughts popping up in my head more often lately. Maybe it was bound to happen you know. ^So what are you gonna go^ said the voice.  

I get off of my bed and walk over to my closet, get into my good bye clothes (https://www.polyvore.com/my_good_bye/set?id=215314515), my wonder woman hat on top. I grab my birthday money and Uncle Elijah old phone which he let me have, doesn’t have a sim card but it still works, and the directions to place. I grab the rest of the letters I need to give and put them in my backpack. “Now the major problem getting out of this house,” I said until it finally hit me.


 I took off all of my bed sheets, which were a lot by the way, off from the bed then threw them out the window. I placed them in a way that they fall one on top of another. I took the pillow cases off of my pillows and threw them down as well. I tossed out my crutches. *I Hope I survive * I thought as I balance standing on the edge of the window. I pull the pillows to my chest and do the leap of faith from assassin’s creed, but it was kinda hard to do with my hurt leg. I groan as I hit the ground even though I made a pile it still hurt. I grabbed my crutches and struggled to get off of the blankets. Once that was over, head straight for Rousseau (Marcel and Cami’s bar). By the time I got there Cami’s shift was hadn’t begun yet thankfully. The room was full of people. I was about to take a seat when ” Y/n what are you doing here,“ said Marcel after I nearly have a heart attack. Thou would kill me it’s not the way I want to go.


 “Oh hey Marcel, how are you?” I said giving him a fake smile but I knew he wasn’t falling for it.“Nice try Y/n ” he said as we take a seat at a nearby table. “So mind telling me what you are doing here?” “I wanted to give this to you,” I said taking out the letters for him and Cami. “They are thank you letters for you and Cami. I wasn’t able to give Jason his either so can you give it to him? ,” I place them onto the table and slide it over to him. “I was hoping to see both of you here. but since Cami isn’t here can you please give this to her?” I query.


 He nods his head and takes the letters. I fight the tears and smile that threaten to break my heartless facade, but I couldn’t help but smirk at knowing those who I truly care about knowing how I feel about them. But as soon as it came it went.“So mind telling me what you are doing giving this to me,” he asked. *Oh Uncle Marcel even thou I didn’t say it a lot to you ‘I love you ’ you may not be blood but you are no water* I thought as I give him a smile. “No Uncle Marcel just a simple thank you letter were supposed to write and deliver one to those who you love,” I said getting up from the table and left Rousseau, leaving Marcel alone looking at the letters.


 _________________________time skip arrival death place_______________




“Finally” passing the entrance of the local indoor pool. No one was here other than me. I passed the locker area and went to the pool. *Huh the little shit is about to do it finally. Thought you were gonna plague the world some more. I don’t see why you are here still you made it this far let’s do it shall we* I wanted to fight the voice but I knew it was no choice. The reason I chose the pool was because of it the one place that no one would look for me. 


When I was young Jason and I would come here with Cassandra Winchester sometimes we all would just play on the not deep side of the pool, but we stopped once she left for a mission and never came back. I highly doubt Jason even remembers this place. No one else knows about this place since I never told anyone about it. The light from the water light up the entire room so it wasn’t dark. I didn’t take off my shoes or jewelry since they all had meant something to me. I walk over to the deep side of the pool that was 7ft. “Goodbye life,” I said then dropped into the water. 


The cold temperature pricked my skin but I didn’t let it bother me as I sank to the bottom. My vision was blurry but I wasn’t sure whether it was because of the water or lack of oxygen. I felt my body slowly sink close to the pools floor*Finally this is it. You free now you don’t have to burden others with your presence.* I thought as black spots blur my vision. I suddenly felt more tired than usual. *maybe a good rest* I slowly close my eyes and release the all the air in my lungs as darkness kills me.

_________Third POV at home_______________time past____________ _____________________________________________________________


No one notices how Y/n has jumped from her bedroom window over Klaus’s screaming. Kol rolls his eyes as his brother talks about how high and mighty he now that he is a hybrid. “Dear Brother Niklaus might you please stop screaming before Hope wakes up,” said Elijah Pouring himself a drink of whiskey. “Klaus opens his mouth to say more but nothing comes out. He storms out of the house slamming the door in his rage making Hope stir in her sleep. “Well that was dramatic,” said Hayley walking into the living room with a tea in her hand. “Has anyone ever told you that is how this family works,” said Cami sitting down next to her. “Cami doesn’t your shift start soon,” said Elijah, Cami chokes on her drink then runs out the room to get to work.


 “Mommmmyyyy!!!!!!” Screamed Hope, the Originals immediately run to her side. She was inside her sister’s room with a letter in her hand. Tears ran down her cheeks as Hayley comforts her child. “Hope what’s wrong?“Said, Elijah, while taking the letter out of her hands. He nearly passes out from what he reads.“There is one in everyone’s room” Hope stuttered holding onto her mother. Elijah hands the letter to Kol, who just stared dead at the letter noticing Y/n’s handwriting, Elijah walks out the room and quickly collects all the other letters.


 “Hope what happened?” said Kol trying not to be angry after reading Hope’s letter.


“Y/n is committing suicide,” she said.


 Everyone froze upon hearing this. That one of their loved ones was willing to take their own life and no one knew why or how she would scream in her pillow at night or how she tried not to sleep til the point she naturally has insomnia. “Why would she do that?” Asked Freya. 


“Why wouldn’t she, you always favor Hope more than her. You didn’t even notice that she was kidnapped,” said Kol glaring at him family “Brother do we—” “STOP BLOODY LYING. DO YOU EVEN REMEMBER HER MIDDLE NAME OR THE LAST TIME YOU LET HER CHOOSE FOR HER BIRTHDAY,” screamed Kol. “You ignore her cause she is human. Cause she isn’t as powerful as Hope. Yet you forget that you were once the same as her but at least we had someone who noticed and cared at least we had each other,” said Kol. “Rebekah,” he said pointing to her “ you have been begging for a human in this family and when we finally have one you ignore the girl”. Rebekah opens her mouth but no words come out. 


“Aaahh and the mother,” he said turning to Hayley. “You wondered about how you treated both of them so badly, but guess what you did even worse you only cared for one,” he spats. Hayley glares at Kol but knows deep down is words are completely right. She never once thought about what Y/n would want to do for her birthday or how she would drink coffee in the morning. “You people may not care for her but I do and I won’t let you people be the reason of her death,” said Kol, storming out the house. Everyone one froze upon hearing these words. The thought of Y/n finally ringing in their heads. Hope dries her her eyes and pulls her mom into a hug. 


The despair was too great that you could cut it with a knife. “I will begin a locator spell,” Freya walks out the door with Y/n’s necklace to begin the spell. Rebekah follows silently out of the house. “Elijah w–"Hayley opens her mouth to ask him a question when she already knows the answer. ‘Was Y/n ever treated like Hope’. They all knew the answer is ‘No’. “ Hope honey its time for bed, ” said Hayley.“ Uncle Elijah will look for Y/n and by tomorrow we will have her back I promise she will be back alive,” Hayley pulls hee daughter in for a hug, Elijah leaves the room but not after placing all the remaining letters on Y/n’s desk before leaving. Hope nods her head and gets ready for bed by herself for the first time in her life. Her mother asked if she needed help, but she denied it and continued on her own. "Mommy you should go find Y/n I will be fine,” Hayley nods and follows her request and leaves the house.

Isabella Gomez just had a live stream on Instagram and here are some of the things I learned

-Her favorite show from Netflix is “Orange Is The New Black”

-One Day At A Time Season 2 starts filming on may 31st

-She likes to have a live audience except for the times where there are intimate scenes like kissing

-She is an only child

-Her voice gets lower when she speaks Spanish and it is insanely cute

-Someone asked her if she was straight (tbh I was like whaaat that is kinda stepping over the line) but she answered anyway and said that she sees sexuality as a spectrum which is really cool

-She said she likes Jennifer Lawrence’s acting. Someone pointed out JLaw is so problematic and she said she knew, she was just talking about acting. She also said she always tries to learn and that sometimes her friends call her out on something and she always appreciates it (honestly she’s the best)

-She works out a lot

-She auditioned for Brooklyn 99 recently but didn’t get the part (whaaat?!)

-When asked if Carmen is coming back she said she doesn’t know but hopes so

-Everyone went “Elena should have a girlfriend” and she just said “I know, I’ve heard you, believe me! The writers have heard you!” So at least they know what we want

-She loves reality shows 😂

-Someone asked “Do you have a type?” And she went all serious and said “Yes. Fuckboys!” and she and her friend laughed

-Her grandfather called her Chavelua, which is her Instagram name

-She loves pasta

-Some people tell her she has an accent or it suddenly comes out with certain words

-Someone asked her if she wanted to have kids (like she is 19 but whatever) and she just went “I don’t want kids 🤔”

-Overall she was very sweet and funny and honest and I feel blessed that she saw some of my comments and answered to many of her fan’s questions

Ten Years (Part 8)

Summary: AU. When a major account is on the line at work, reader is forced to revisit some old connections at her ten year high school reunion for a chance at success. Will she let the past consume her, or will she see the future in her grasp?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 3,475 (minus the flashback) (yes I need to stop)

Warnings: language, sarcasm, fluff, mentions of past cheating, drinking, potentially anxious situations, confrontation, crying (every chapter has the same warnings because I’m melodramatic)

A/N: Tags are closed. I rewrote this whole damn thing again, and I’m an angsty bag of trash today, so it’s completely reflected here. I kept asking myself out loud, “Why are you like this?”

Part: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 -

Originally posted by sebjpeg

Keep reading

The Last Time

Heartbreak and sadness are of the deadliest poisons, for they kill you slowly in misery. 

Genre: smut and angst

Sehun continued to pound into you. He kept a steady pace and made sure to hit all the right angles. Your head board continuously hit wall, sure to leave a dent. Sweat made stray hairs cling to your forehead. Looking at Sehun’s body above was like a dream. From his chiseled abs, the his arms that were just the right amount of toned, up to his jaw line that was so sharp, you swore it could cut diamonds. You ran your hands over his chest and over his shoulders, playing with the hair at the base of his neck as he brought you closer to your release.

 "You’re so tight, even after all this time.“ He grunted, a sheen of sweat forming on his face as he picked up the pace. You moaned in response, filled with to much pleasure to form sounds besides wanton moans and mewls. You reached up and cupped his cheek in your hand before bringing your lips together. It was a battle of teeth and tongue. Each of you battled for the upper hand, but in the end you let him win, you always did. He pulled on your bottom lip with his teeth as he felt your walls clenching around him.

 "I’m so close Sehun” you breathed. 

 "Cum for me baby" he replied hiking you leg over his hip and angling deeper inside you. Soon you were seeing white as the knot in your stomach came undone. His name fell from your lips as you rode out your high. Sehun soon followed suit, pulling out and releasing his seed onto your stomach. Without wasting a second he was off the bed and pulling his boxers back on. 

 "Here" he mentioned tossing a towel in your direction, “clean yourself up. See you tomorrow.” With that he gathered his remaining clothes and walked out your bedroom door. It had been like this for months, meeting in the middle of the night for a meaningless hookup, only to pretend you were acquaintances the next day. You were one of the many assistants at SM entertainment. You had gotten the position on a fluke, but you were grateful for the job nonetheless. Sehun had immediately noticed the new girl, prancing through the halls in her modest heels, politely greeting various idols and board members that came in. What captivated him the most was how you looked like a shy, girl next door type on the outside, but you held a glint in your eye that said otherwise. He had a feeling you could be quite dirty outside of work, and he was right. He had made you a proposition; to hookup with him and help him relive stress. Although it was a shocking proposition, it was a once in a lifetime opportunity, and you would benefit by sleeping with one of your favorite exo members. It was a win win for both of you, and there were no rules against dating idols in your contract, so you obliged. Not 1 month after you started your job did the secret meet ups start, and when you were almost a year into working there, and the secret was still safe. 

_____________

 You heard your front door being opened and silently shut seconds later, signaling he had left. You sighed and moved to clean yourself up before showering, a feeling of sadness washing over you.  

Probably just the gloomy weather. You thought to yourself as rain continued to fall outside. 

With one last look out the bathroom window, you stepped into your hot shower, feeling instantly relaxed. You let the water consume you, running through your hair and then down your body. No matter how hot you made the water, you couldn’t rid yourself of the guilt and shame you felt after every fuck. You knew it was wrong, no matter how much you wanted it to be right. Even though you were able to silence your conscious every time Sehun wanted to come over, you couldn’t keep it quiet forever. Every time he left there was the nagging feeling tugging at you, eating you from the inside out. Self loathing would spread through every corner of your body, making you regret your decision, only for you to make it again the next day. 

One day I will say no to him…. one day

___________  

“Ms. ____________, please put this in the storage room for me." 

 "Of course sir” you replied to your supervisor with a light bow. 

 "After you may take your lunch.“ 

 "Thank you sir” was your response to his retreating figure. He was so busy that you hardly ever saw him. When you did, he usually gave you a list of things to do. You rendered yourself lucky this time. As you began taking the supplies to the room like he asked, you felt your phone vibrate. Carefully placing your items down, you read what was on the screen.

 Also, I need for you to organize the file room. The paper work hasn’t been filed away properly, and it’s getting out of hand. Once that is finished, you may go home. 

“Spoke to soon” you mumbled mostly to yourself. Hopefully the file room wasn’t that bad, You wanted nothing more than to go home and just relax. ___________ 

 The file room was pretty destroyed when you had walked in. Someone had obviously been looking for something, but didn’t want to clean their mess up after. Thankfully, after an hour of organizing, you were almost done. You were bending down to put a file in the bottom drawer when someone came up behind you and shut the door. The sound of it locking filled the quiet space. 

 "I found you" 

 You didn’t have to turn around to know who was there. It was none other than Oh Sehun. He walked up behind you and placed his hands on your hips. You felt his hardening member pressing into your ass. 

 "What do you say we have a quickie before I take off for practice?“ He breathed into your ear as you stood. His breath fanned across your neck as he spoke and it sent chills straight to your core. 

 I have to tell him no, my job could be jeopardized for sleeping with an idol on the clock. But he is so tempting… stupid sexy Sehun. 

He interrupted you internal debate by nibbling on the spot below your ear, his hands found their way around your waist and rested right above your womanhood. You wanted to nothing more than to lean into his touch and give into his needs, but your job was on the line. 

 "I can’t” you finally responded, removing his hands from your body and ultimately turning to see him. Disappointment flashed across his features before being replaced with his signature resting bitch face. 

 "Why? Do you suddenly have morals?“ He retorted, crossing his arms over his chest. That was a low blow, you both knew that. 

 "What is that supposed to mean?” Irritation was itching to come out as you spoke, but you held your composure. 

 "Maybe it means that you are such a good slut for me when we meet outside of work, but now you are being a prude.“ His words stabbed through you like a knife. But he wasn’t done. 

 "You do realize I could easily hookup with any one of the assistants in this office right? Who knows, maybe they would be a better fuck than you.” 

Saying you were hurt was an understatement. His words pierced your heart like a dull rusted knife that he kept twisting and twisting as he continued to insult you. You had let your feelings for him go to far, and now you were paying the price as your little charade fell to pieces in front of your eyes. How stupid of you to think that you could be happy with your friend with benefits deal you had with Sehun. What a fool you were for loving this man. Your pride was hurt, and you wanted nothing more than to yell and scream at him, to tell him he was a bastard and didn’t deserve your love. But alas you couldn’t do that. So you heaved a heavy sigh, swallowed your pride and simply stated, 

” I do realize that. Which is why I am ending things here. Last night was the last time Sehun. Have a good life. Exo fighting!“ 

 You walked pat him, brushing your shoulder against him as you did. With unsteady hands you unlocked the door and walked out, leaving a speechless Sehun in your wake.

__________ 

A week had passed since that day. You had put in your 2 week notice promptly after the incident. Sehun held true to his word of hooking up with another assistant. It was as if you meant nothing to him. But that’s how it works right? A normal girl falls in love with the idol, they have their share of fun together and the idol leaves for bigger and better things. While you tried your hardest to let go of the idea of Sehun, it was proving to be difficult. So hopefully after leaving the company, you would have a better chance at healing, at least that what you desperately hoped for. This was what you wanted for yourself after all. To be more than just an easy fuck to someone. To have meaning to someone. 

You were so lost in your thoughts, you didn’t watch where you were going. Next thing you knew, your documents were on the floor and so were you. 

 "I am so sorry, are you ok?” You looked up to the angelic voice that was currently helping you gather your belongings. It was another member of Sehun’s group, the leader of it actually, Kim Junmyeon, or Suho, as his fans liked to call him.

 "Oh I’m so sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going and I was so lost in my thoughts and I-“ 

 "You don’t have to explain yourself to me” he concluded with a silky laugh. He grabbed your hand and pulled you to a standing position. Trying not to let him see how sheepish you were feeling, you smoothed out the non existent wrinkles in your skirt. 

 "I do have to ask though, what was clouding your thoughts so much that you didn’t look to see where you were walking? You seemed like you were lost since way over there.“ He gestured to the hall you had just came from, which was a good 50 feet away. 

You didn’t realize how long you were immersed in your inner turmoil. Out of nervous habit, you began biting your bottom lip. Answering his question was hard, but you didn’t want to lie to him either. Instead of responding you just looked down. 

 "It’s about Sehun isn’t it” he gently questioned, barely loud enough for you to hear. Cautiously you looked up at him and was met with a sympathetic gaze. 

He has to know what had happened, there was no way he couldn’t

Sehun was his roommate so you were sure that suho knew of everything. Shame overtook you, crashing down upon you in harsh waves. A hurricane of guilt and discomfort filled you, flooding your entirety and looking for an escape through tears. You tried hard to hold them back, to ashamed to make yourself vulnerable to suho, and to cautious to let anyone know how much the whole situation affected you. Silent sobs fought to break through you, making your shoulders shake and your breathing become less than perfect. 

 "Hey, don’t cry" he cooed, gently lifting your chin so he could see your face. He saw how broken you really were. You had loved Sehun. He could see that written all over your face. Sehun had broken your heart into a million pieces and moved on like it was nothing to him. He felt terrible for what the maknae had done to the pretty girl who always had a smile on her face while she worked. 

He gently used the pad of his thumb to wipe the cascade of tears from your cheeks. Your struggle to remain stoic was over as you let go of all the pent up emotions. All the frustration, all the loneliness, and all the heart break. Suho sensed your need to cry and pulled you into his chest, one arm wrapping around your waist while the other soothingly rubbed your back. As if out of instinct, you grabbed onto his shirt and cried your eyes out, destroying the designer material in the process. You didn’t care how red your face got or how much your makeup ran in that moment. All that mattered was that you had finally let your wall down and all the emotions were flooding out and into the arms of someone you felt you could trust, even if you had just barely met a few moments back. Suho continued rubbing your back, pulling you tighter against him as your sons began to quiet down. 

 "It’s going to be all right" he repeated like a mantra as he continued his ministrations, “it’s going to be all right." 

 ___________ 

Sehun had just caught word from a few other assistants in the office that you had planned on leaving. Even though he had moved onto another easy lay in the building, it didn’t mean he was ready to let you go. He stormed through the halls, looking in all the places you usually were. When all those places turned out to be dead ends, he decided to ask the front desk of your where abouts. Quickly rounding the corner, he got his answer before even asking, because there before him was you, curled up in the arms of his groups leader suho.

-Sara

A/N: I found this while cleaning out my computer, and I am debating whether or not to continue it. Let me know if you want another part ^^

Originally posted by fy-sexo-exo

Hello! I’m new to Studyblr so I thought I’d take my first post as an opportunity to introduce myself.

  • I’m Joel and I come from the UK!
  • I’m 17 years old and I was born on the 11th February.
  • I’m a first year A-Level Student studying English Literature, History & Mathematics.
  • I’m an INFJ and a Ravenclaw.
  • I hope to study English at a University, it’s one of my greatest passions.
  • I own a bullet journal and often tend to forget to keep updating it. But, I’m trying to make Sundays my spread drawing days.
  • I’m left handed, the only one in my family!
  • I love to read, some of my favourite authors include Sarah J. Maas, Susan Dennard, Rainbow Rowell, J.K Rowling, Marie Lu & Leigh Bardugo.
  • I confess not to having read many classic novels, but I’m trying to change that this year by reading at least 15 classics.
  • I want to become an author or someone who works within the publishing world.
  • Procrastination is my worst enemy, and I suffer from it a lot! :(
  • I watch tv, play video games, listen to music or read books in my spare time. Asian dramas are the best tv, hands down.

@studyquill@focusign@studyblr@studypetals@caffestudy - @studycoffees -  @rhubarbstudies - @studylilacs - @emmastudies - @studywithinspo - @sprouht-studies

All of these studyblrs are amazing so I highly recommend checking them out (Although you might already have them in your followers list!)

Currently, I use a Muji 0.5mm Ballpoint Pen to write class notes with and I do my titles with a Faber Castell PITT Artist Pen. For added colour, I have the other colours in the Muji 0.5mm set but also a set of 50 Crayola Supertip Pens which are kind of like Mildliners. For Bullet Journaling, I like to use a Leuchtturm1917 notebook, I love the feel of the notebooks. 

I’m so excited to meet you all! Reblog this post if you’re a Studyblr too so I can follow you :D

anonymous asked:

Hii, Could you do a Bts reaction to another member falling asleep on their s/o??

Kim Namjoon/ Rap Monster: Of course he would wake up his hyung and take his place on your lap.

*Clears Throat* “Why is he-? YAH! Go sleep somewhere else”

Originally posted by yoonseok


Kim Seokjin: He would get defensive because other member looks to be a little too close to your lady bits.

Hey hey hey!! Push him off!”

Originally posted by bulletproof-heaven


Min Yoongi/Suga : In all honesty, Yoongi wouldn’t care much because he knows that you are very motherly, but he also knows that he gets to have to all to himself later.

I see someone beat me to it. Just remember who you belong to.”

Originally posted by bangtan


Jung Hoseok/ J-Hope:  Hobi doesn’t mind sharing, he just wants to lay on your lap because it’s more cushion. 

Uuuugh hyuuuuung! I’m tired at least let ME have her lap!”

Originally posted by jhope-shi


Park Jimin: Jimin would probably playfully fight with his sleepy hyung but is secretly very serious.

She’s mine!”

Originally posted by bts-jimin16

Kim Taehyung: Like Hobi, Tae wouldn’t mind sharing. Tae just loves how nurturing you are toward the everyone and feels lucky that you are all his. 

“That’s so cute”

Originally posted by btstaehyunged

Jeon Jungkook: He won’t like it, but he will allow it and pout at you later for not pushing off the other member.

“You have no right…”

Originally posted by ktaejin

I know i know! I’m not good at reactions but i also can’t sleep so might as well blog. I hope you guys have a good night. LOVE YOU ALL

~Admin Coco

Some thoughts on the Watson marriage

First of all, upfront: I believe Mary and John sincerely loved each other and were genuinely trying to make their relationship work. But clearly, at least on some levels, it was not working, and I want to play armchair marriage counsellor for a bit and look at why.

So, obviously, the first major misstep in their marriage is Mary lying about her history and identity, and then shooting John’s best friend to protect her secret.  Why didn’t she just tell him who she was from the beginning? 

MARY: John can’t ever know that I lied to him. It would break him and I would lose him forever.

She was terrified that he wouldn’t love her if he found out about her past.  What might have given her that idea?  What messages was John sending her that his love was conditional on her being ordinary, sweet, and safe?

In some ways, John’s behavior after he finds out the truth proves her fears unjustified.  Though he struggles for a while, he doesn’t leave her, and he makes a renewed commitment to their relationship.  So far so good.  But look at what he says to her:

JOHN: The problems of your past are your business. The problems of your future … are my privilege. It’s all I have to say. It’s all I need to know.

It’s a very romantic moment, and clearly well-intentioned. And Mary is grateful for his forgiveness, and agrees to move forward with him.  But there’s a mixed message hidden in John’s statement.  In throwing away the thumb drive unread, he’s confirming her suspicion that he can’t love the person she was in the past, only the persona she has created.  

MARY: You don’t even know my name.
JOHN: Is ‘Mary Watson’ good enough for you?

Here again – it’s a lovely and romantic sentiment, but even as Mary was thrilled to accept his forgiveness, she must have gotten the message that Mary Watson is acceptable, but her history as Rosamund is not.  That could only have heightened her sense of insecurity in the relationship.  It would have been a much more generous gesture on John’s part if he had simply asked her name at that moment, instead of shoving it into the closet of things we must never speak of.

In TST, John acts surprised that Mary is still keeping secrets from him, but what choice did he give her?  He basically told her there’s this whole part of her life that he doesn’t want to hear about.  

And when he does catch her in her lies, John tries to be understanding, but he makes another small mistake with big repercussions:

JOHN: Mary, I may not be a very good man, but I think I’m a bit better than you give me credit for, most of the time.

I think what he means is that he’s not as judgmental as she thinks – she doesn’t need to hide from him, because he would support her even in difficult times.  But by phrasing it in terms of him being “good”, he also unintentionally reminds her that she is not good.  This is a difference between them in her mind: he is good and she is bad.  

MARY: You’re always a good man, John. I’ve never doubted that. You never judge; you never complain. I don’t deserve you.

She seems here to be accepting his claim that he won’t judge her. But in saying that she doesn’t deserve him, she’s highlighting the fact that he makes her feel lesser, which makes her insecure and leads her to lie and misrepresent herself in order to seem “good” enough for him.  

Once they get back home, she states this problem again, even more clearly:

MARY: You don’t make it easy, do you?
JOHN: What d’you mean?
MARY: Well, being … being so perfect.

Unmistakably, she is trying to tell him how hurt she is by the roles they’ve unwittingly assigned each other: Perfect John and Bad Mary.  And at last, it seems like John gets it. Before they’re interrupted, he starts to tell her about his affair in an effort to reassure Mary that neither of them is perfect.  It feels like the best chance they have for a fresh start based on a better understanding of and respect for each other as real, flawed people.

Then, sadly, Mary dies before they are able to hash this out. And one of the most tragic elements of her death scene is this:

MARY: Being Mary Watson was the only life worth living.

Mary wants to leave their relationship on the best note possible, but it breaks my heart that even with her dying breaths, she feels the best way to do this is to deny the “bad Rosamund” that John always seemed to be rejecting, and present herself as the “good Mary” that she believed John wanted her to be.

And the thing is, I don’t think John ever intended her to feel that way.  He wears a conventional veneer, but Sherlock is right – deep down, John wanted to be with someone as dangerous and morally grey as he is.  He initially thought he wanted perfect Mary, but he really fell in love with the more complicated Rosamund underneath.

And yet, even though he loved her, forgave her, and respected her for the most part, a part of him was still angry and resentful over Mary’s betrayal, and I think he unconsciously picked on her for it in these subtle ways.  

Which is understandable, if not ideal.  But what *really* saddens me is what John says at the end of TLD:

JOHN: I’m not the man you thought I was; I’m not that guy. I never could be. But that’s the point. That’s the whole point. Who you thought I was… is the man who I want to be.

No, John, no!  He’s so close here, but then he gets it so wrong.  Mary doesn’t want you to be that perfect man she thought you were! Mary thought that dude was kind of a jerk!  And she was right, honestly.  What Mary was trying to tell you is, that man is sanctimonious, patronizing, and judgmental.  DON’T BE THAT GUY.  No one likes that guy, least of all Mary.  

Mary didn’t want a “good man”, she wanted a partner in crime. Someone who understood her and respected her – ALL of her, not just the pretty and well-behaved bits.  At your best, John, you were that partner, but at your worst, you were a superior, scolding, hypocritical prig.

I’m not sure, but I think (I hope?) this is what Sherlock’s getting at during this exchange:

SHERLOCK: It’s not a pleasant thought, John, but I have this terrible feeling, from time to time, that we might all just be human.
JOHN: Even you?
SHERLOCK: No. Even you.

The lesson John needs to learn is not to be a better man for the perfect, imaginary version of Mary in his head, but to be kinder and more accepting and empathetic to the real, flawed person Mary actually was.  And to honor her memory, perhaps be kinder and more accepting and empathetic to people like her – including himself.

anonymous asked:

WHATS BANGTANS FUTURE CONCEPT???????

The future concept will be “Love Yourself”. Each member will release a drama style video with other actors. 👼👼👼

I’m really excited because “Love Yourself” is a very important sentence for Namnam, he talks about this since 2015. Like he said in the fancafe, to able to love yourself you have to be brave but also to be able to forgive yourself. So I guess they will also exploit these two concepts too!
Tbh that’s one of the reason why I fell for him. He is so vulnerable and he’s not afraid to show this side of himself. More than everything he wants to help us. In the same fancafe post he talks about how loving yourself can be difficult for “us”. He included himself and Armys who also have this issue. I would be very intimidated to talk about this personal problem, but he wasn’t because he just wanted to help at least one person, the hope that someone will relate, that someone will feel comfort in his words.
This post means a lot for me, I think the title is ‘Love Yourself’. 2 years ago it really had an impact on me, his words were so powerful and they still are. I remember by heart this part “if you have a warm heart, there is definitely a person out there with a heart of similar warmth and will appear in your life” then he finished by saying “so let’s just forgive ourself”. And idk, the way he worded it is just so powerful.
He wrote in 2016 his solo. After one year he still had difficulties to love himself and he confessed it again. I know that he’s happy now, and I sincerely want him to fully love himself, because he deserves it.

So yeah all of this to say that it’s going to be a very emotional era;;;;;;; (and I’m very emo now omg)

EDIT: I didnt say it but yeah nothing is confirmed! The concept will be “Love Yourself” this is sure but we still don’t know about the lil videos or the actors or anything. Big Hit planned it but nothing is sure👼👼
Home, family & other herbs

Davy Perez is sort of filling the huge hole that Robbie Thompson left in my heart when he left. His last two episodes have been incredibly good, so I’ve decided to take advantage of the motivation that has apparently come back to me. As usual, most of the posts I write focus on the Dean/Cas relationship, so if that’s not your thing, you will probably not like this. There are five things about episode 12x15 that I want to point out as relevant to me in regards to Dean and Cas.

The first relevant thing was that Dean’s the one communicating with Cas. Dean was talking on the phone with Cas while Sam was doing the same with Mary. Of course, Sam had to become Mary’s direct line of communication, mostly after he agreed to work with the BMoL. And of course Dean was the one receiving updates of what Cas was doing –both at the beginning and at the end of the episode. It’s exactly what anyone would expect. I simply liked the visuals. For example, Dean’s and Sam’s conversations were simultaneous the first time we saw Dean on the phone with Cas.

The second time, it was obvious Dean was the one making the call even if he had Cas on speaker. 

I think these visuals reinforced the idea that when Cas isn’t at the Bunker, Dean keeps an interest in whatever he’s doing.

The second relevant thing was that Dean noticed something was off with Cas. Just as Dean was the one who noticed that something wasn’t alright with Mary in episode 12x13, this time he noticed that something felt off with Cas, too. As I mentioned above, Dean had Cas on speaker; that means both Dean and Sam heard what Cas was saying. However, Sam didn’t notice anything weird, whereas Dean did. The same happened last season when Lucifer was possessing Cas. Dean noticed that something was off, but Sam dismissed Dean’s suspicions. Dean is very perceptive with the people he loves.

 Another important thing regarding the Dean/Cas relationship had to do with Cas’ conversation with the other angel in this episode. The other angel asked Cas if he ever missed Heaven. He said that no matter how much he loved Earth, it wasn’t home. Cas made no comment about it. Don’t you think it’s interesting that an angel talked to Cas about home just three episodes after Dean Winchester offered Cas to go home?

(Source x

It’s even more interesting to think that both episodes were written by the same writer. Don’t you think it’s also very remarkable that this angel used the words “family” and “true family” to convince Cas to give himself a chance to be forgiven and welcomed in Heaven? It was Cas himself who called the Winchesters his family three episodes ago; it was Cas himself who confessed how much he loved them.

(Source x)

All of that happened in an episode written by Davy Perez, so I’m pretty sure what’s going on with Cas is on purpose, and I’m quite excited about it. I’ve spent more than 3 years waiting for the moment when Cas will choose the Winchesters (and by that, I mean Dean) not because he has to, not to save anyone’s life, but simply because he really wants to.  

The fourth relevant thing I need to mention is the fact that Dean thanked Crowley for saving Cas. Dean Winchester thanking the King of Hell himself for saving Cas was something I never expected to happen. I knew Dean was grateful; I just didn’t think he would bring himself to say it out loud. For some reason that reminded me of Benny. In season 8 we were shown that Dean learned to trust Benny because he saved Cas. Dean never said it textually, but the subtext was very clear. This time Dean used his own words to express his gratitude to Crowley for saving the life of someone that means a lot to him. That was better than I could have expected.

The last thing about the episode I want to point out is the foreshadowing we were given during the conversation between Sam and Gwen. I’m perfectly aware that the lying part Gwen mentioned was supposed to make Sam realize that lying to Dean was a bad idea, and that was why Sam told Dean the truth about working with the BMoL at the end. However, in this episode we had another person who decided to keep information from Dean: none other than Castiel. Cas didn’t tell Dean that he was going to Heaven to talk to Joshua, but Dean will find out sooner or later.

The thing is that the relationship between Marcus and Gwen doesn’t foreshadow anything good for Dean and Cas. Gwen is the one who survived, the one who felt that Marcus loved her more than she ever loved him. The one question she asked herself was: Why couldn’t I just tell him the truth? She lied even though she knew everything was over, but why was everything over? I suppose it was because of the long distance thing. What about Dean and Cas? Cas was tempted with the idea of going back to Heaven. He lied to Dean (or at least didn’t tell him something) probably to make things easier, just as Gwen. What can be more of a long distance situation than going to Heaven while the other person stays on Earth? Is it possible that season 12 will end with Cas going back to Heaven? (Of course, even if that were the case, I’m sure it wouldn’t be forever).

Some people might think that Gwen could be a Dean parallel. Truth be told, I thought about that possibility as well, but I discarded it because I don’t think lying to Cas is part of Dean’s arc. In this episode the one who had to leave was Gwen, so I see her as a Cas parallel because it’s more logical to expect Cas to leave. Nevertheless, I have to say that the “Why couldn’t I just tell him the truth?” could apply to both Dean and Cas. Dean hasn’t told Cas his feelings. What if Dean’s the one staying on Earth feeling that Cas loved him more than he ever did and feeling guilty for never telling him the truth about what Cas meant to him. This could be interpreted in both ways, and for some reason I consider the two options too painful to bear.

These are the things about the Dean/Cas relationship that caught my attention from episode 12x15. Dean is obviously the one communicating with Cas, the one noticing that something is going on with Cas, and the one being thankful for still having his angel alive. In addition, Cas’ arc about choosing to be an angel or human isn’t over yet. He still has to figure out what family he wants for himself and where exactly his home is. Finally, season 12 is foreshadowing more unrequited love between Dean and Cas (or at least that’s what they both think) and a huge chance that Cas ends up this season upstairs.  This episode has a lot of layers to discuss, so if I missed something, I hope someone else can write about it. All in all, I appreciate the effort Mr. Perez is making to keep his episodes consistent to the themes that are being developed. Now I’m looking forward to the rest of the season that will probably make me suffer too much.

At the end of the day, all I want is to be able to say that I did enough to fill up the empty space around me. I want to know I have left enough words spoken, reverberating in the air, echoing off of someone else’s thoughts, I want to know that you have heard me. I hope that I have walked with intention, left no stone unaware of where I’m going even if it’s down an undetermined path, I hope I have showed you at least that I am moving. And love, let it be known that I have done my best, wore my heart on my chest where it belongs, made it the center of everything I do– love until every crevice is filled, every ache is understood, every person has someone to go to. At the end of the day, all I want is to know that I am a full person, that I lived all that I could and well enough that not even karma, cosmic balance, astrology, or whatever is in the stars for me could ever spell out my future. I want to be a force to be reckoned with, an existence interwoven in–not bound by–gravity, I want to grab the universe by its core, stare it down, and let it know that everything and anything that comes out of this life is authored by no other hands than my own.
—  Existentialism
Another betrayal

Ahh, just when I thought Oswald would get a short break from suffering. we get to see him get betrayed by Gabe. I know we all championed Gabe as someone who has always been loyal to Oswald. A lot of us wanted him to be the one to rescue Oswald during 3x14 but this episode made it clear that he never cared about him. It wasn’t just that he wanted to play a part in Oswald’s death … he was so cruel that he wanted to SELL Oswald to the highest bidder. It was like there was a point being made that no one from Oswald’s life had truly cared about him. 

And that is why I am so thankful for Ivy. Because on one hand, Oswald is learning that even someone like Gabe is willing to betray him. But at the same time you have this new person who wants nothing from him except to be his friend. Oswald is understandably wary of new friends after everything that’s happened but Ivy just wants to help him. All she’s asking in exchange is that he be nice to her. I think this new friendship is so important right now. Every bit of hope is being taken away from Oswald but then Ivy is there to restore at least a tiny bit of it.

Wicked Lyric Meme
  • "Isn't it nice to know that good will conquer evil?"
  • "No one mourns the wicked."
  • "The good man scorns the wicked."
  • "Goodness knows, the wickeds lives are only."
  • "Goodness knows, the wicked die alone."
  • "Are people born wicked? Or do they have wickedness thrust upon them?"
  • "Have another drink, my dark eyed beauty."
  • "Woe to those who spurn what goodness they are shown."
  • "Many years I have waited for a gift like yours to appear."
  • "My future is unlimited."
  • "What is this feeling so sudden and new?"
  • "Let's just say, I loathe it all."
  • "Every little trait, however small, makes my very flesh begin to crawl."
  • "There's a strange exhilaration in such total detestation."
  • "I will be loathing you my whole life long."
  • "These things are sent to try us."
  • "The trouble with school is they always try to teach the wrong lesson."
  • "Life's more painless for the brainless."
  • "It's just life, so keep dancing through."
  • "Life is fraughtless for the thoughtless."
  • "Those who don't try never look foolish."
  • "I hope you'll save at least one dance for me. I'll be right there. Waiting. All night."
  • "It's clear we deserve each other."
  • "Finally for this one night, I'm about to have a fun night."
  • "Black is this year's pink."
  • "I've got something to confess. A reason, well, why I asked you here tonight."
  • "We deserve each other. Don't we?"
  • "I've decided to make you my new project."
  • "When someone needs a makeover, I simply have to take over."
  • "You're gonna be popular!"
  • "I'll teach you the proper ploys when you talk to boys, little ways to flirt and flounce."
  • "I'll help you be popular!"
  • "Don't be offended by my frank analysis, think of it as personality dialysis."
  • "Did they have brains or knowledge? Don't make me laugh!"
  • "It's not about aptitude, its the way you're viewed."
  • "He could be that boy, but I'm not that girl."
  • "Don't dream too far."
  • "Don't lose sight of who you are."
  • "Wishing only wounds the heart."
  • "One short day full of so much to do."
  • "I think we've found the place where we belong."
  • "One short day to have a lifetime of fun."
  • "I am a sentimental man who's always longed to be a father."
  • "I think everyone deserves the chance to fly."
  • "Why couldn't you have stayed calm for once instead of flying off the handle!"
  • "I hope you're happy how you hurt your cause forever."
  • "I hope you're proud how you would grovel in submission to feed your own ambition."
  • "I don't want it- no- I can't want it anymore."
  • "Something has changed within me. Something is not the same."
  • "I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game."
  • "It's time to try defying gravity."
  • "Can't I make you understand youre having delusions of grandeur?"
  • "I'm through accepting limits cuz someone says they're so."
  • "Some things I cannot change but til I try, I'll never know."
  • "If that's love it comes at much too high a cost."
  • "I really hope you get it and you don't live to regret it."
  • "If in flying solo, at least I'm flying free."
  • "Happy is what happens when all your dreams come true."
  • "People are so empty headed, they'll believe anything."
  • "I can't harbor a fugitive. I'm an elected official."
  • "There isn't a spell for everything."
  • "Finally from these powers, something good."
  • "Surely now I'll matter less to you. You won't mind my leaving here tonight."
  • "I've got to go appeal to her. Express the way I feel for her."
  • "You're going to lose your heart to me, I tell you."
  • "I never asked for this or planned it in advance."
  • "If you insist I will be wonderful."
  • "Where I'm from we believe all sorts of things that aren't true. We call it history."
  • "A rich man's a thief or a philanthropist."
  • "Is one a crusader or a ruthless invader?"
  • "It's all in which label is able to persist."
  • "I need help believing you're with me tonight."
  • "My wildest dreamings could not foresee lying beside you with you wanting me."
  • "I'll make every last moment last as long as you're mine."
  • "Maybe I'm brainless, maybe I'm wise, but you've got me seeing through different eyes."
  • "Somehow I've fallen under your spell."
  • "Say there's no future for us as a pair."
  • "Know I'll be here holding you as long as you're mine."
  • "It's just...for the first time, I feel wicked."
  • "Let his flesh not be torn."
  • "Let his blood leave no stain."
  • "Let him never die."
  • "You're the latest victim of my greatest achievment in a long career of distress."
  • "No good deed goes unpunished. That's my new creed."
  • "Was I really seeking good or just seeking attention?"
  • "No good deed will I do again!"
  • "Wickedness must be punished. Evil effectively eliminated."
  • "I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn."
  • "We are led to those who help us most to grow if we let them."
  • "I know I'm wrong am today because I knew you."
  • "Who can say if I've been changed for the better."
  • "Because I knew you, I have been changed for good."
  • "So much of me is made of what I learned from you."
  • "I ask forgiveness for the things I've done you blame me for."