when you watch a show and feel a billion things at once because your favorite characters come for your soul with some knee-jerking and tear-jerking scenes and suddenly you start to question how long your tear ducts will be safe, because you’ve been crying about them for so long (SOMEONE HAS TO BE EMOTIONAL ABOUT THEM OKAY AND OBVIOUSLY IT HAS TO BE ME).
if you know my blog you know that i’ve been fervently posting about raven and sinclair’s relationship for a while now, but i’m seriously about to die on the raven x sinclair hill because these two have literally just consumed and ruined me for good - no turning back. Ever. here’s the deal:
remember when in 3x12 sinclair wanted to keep raven save but didn’t manage to do so due to his wound that emerson caused him? how he so desperately wanted raven to stay in the rover because he knew emerson was still out there trying to get her? how he tried to convince raven that “it’s okay”, because he knew that she wouldn’t just leave him behind - dying on the ground? how he died with that image of raven crying above him anyway? not knowing if she would make it out alive, but definitely leaving knowing that she wanted to save him as well - “I’m gonna get you out of here!” - which she ultimately couldn’t?
everyday of my damn life i remember how this all ended and how it left me hollow.
BUT FOR THE FIRST TIME IN FOREVER I GET SOMETHING GOOD BECAUSE 4x11 HAPPENS AND CHANGES EVERYTHING FOR RAVEN AND SINCLAIR.
the minute I saw the sneak peek and heard someone whisper “reyes” i knew it was him. the thing with sinclair is that he does not just appear, but he appears when raven is in immediate danger once again - having her third seizure of the day as ALIE states - shaking on the ground alone with a bleeding nose, not managing to get the med-kit. NO ONE around who could help her, because everyone left.
BUT THEN THERE IS SINCLAIR WHO SWEEPS INTO THE SCENE
AND THE FIRST THING HE DOES IS HOLD HER HAND
THE SAME WAY HE HELD ONTO HER FACE (AND SHE HIS HAND) BEFORE HE DIED, BECAUSE THIS IS THE BEST WAY TO MAKE RAVEN AWARE OF HIS PRESENCE, TO GIVE HER SAFETY, TO GROUND HER. THEY RECONNECT AFTER SO LONG AND IT HAPPENS UNDER SUCH DRAMATIC CIRCUMSTANCES THAT IT BASICALLY MAKES ME CRY BECAUSE ITS SO TENDER.
AND THE BEST THING? RAVEN’S HEART IS SO DEEPLY AT PLAY HERE! MANIFESTING SINCLAIR AFTER LOSING HIM! OR THE FACT THAT SINCLAIR ISN’T IN A POSITION IN WHICH HE HAS TO LEAVE HER SIDE BUT CAN BE WITH HER AND HELP WITH A HEAVY AMOUNT OF LOVE.
IN OTHER WORDS: THESE TWO ARE INTENSIFYING MY FEELINGS INTO ETERNITY AND I NO LONGER HAVE A HEART BECAUSE IT BLEW UP