i hear she does car commercials

U don't know who Riley is???

R u kidding me. Riley…. How do I even begin to explain Riley. Riley is flawless. He has two weed stashes and a hydrogenerator. I hear his hair’s insured for $10,000. I hear he does car commercials…On the Ground. One time he met Clarke in Farm Station…And she told him he was pretty. One time he punched me in the face. It was awesome.

  • Klaus: Caroline Forbes... How do I begin to explain Caroline Forbes?
  • Matt: Caroline Forbes is flawless.
  • Enzo: I hear her hair is insured in $10,000.
  • Elijah: I hear she does car commercials… in Japan.
  • Rebekah: Her favorite movie is Varsity Blues.
  • Kol: One time she met John Stamos on a plane…
  • Bonnie: And he told her she was pretty.
  • Damon: One time she punched me in the face… it was awesome
  • Kiritsugu: Irisviel Von Einzbern...how do I begin to explain Irisviel Von Einzbern?
  • Saber: Irisviel Von Einzbern is flawless.
  • Gilgamesh: I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.
  • Maiya: I hear she does car commercials...in Japan.
  • Kirei: One time she punched me in the face.
  • Kirei: It was awesome.
How do I even begin to explain Ahren Schreave?
  • Camille: Ahren Schreave is flawless.
  • Hale: He has two crowns AND a limousine.
  • Kile: I hear his hair's insured for $10,000.
  • Ean: I hear he does car commercials. In New Asia.
  • Henri: Favorite movie ees Notebook.
  • Fox: One time, he met Tessa Tamble on a plane.
  • Erik: And she told him he was hot.
  • Jack Ranger: One time he punched me in the face. It was awesome.
  • Paul: Stella Gibson... How do I begin to explain Stella Gibson?
  • Dani: Stella Gibson is flawless.
  • Gail: I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.
  • Reed: I hear she does car commercials... in Croydon.
  • Eastwood: Her least favorite band is U2.
  • Tom: One time she met David Duchovny on a plane... And he told her she was pretty.
  • Jim: One time she punched me in the face... it was awesome.
  • Goku: Bulma Briefs... How do I begin to explain Bulma Briefs?...
  • Oolong: Bulma Briefs is flawless.
  • Chichi: She has two Fendi purses and a silver Lexus.
  • Yamcha: I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.
  • Tien: I hear she does car commercials... In Japan.
  • Chiaotzu: Her favorite movie is Varsity Blues.
  • Puar: One time she met John Stamos on a plane...
  • Launch: - And he told her she was pretty.
  • Krillin: One time she punched me in the face... It was awesome.
How do I even begin to explain the signs?

Gemini and Virgo are flawless.

Taurus and Libra each have two Fendi purses and a silver Lexus.

I hear Leo’s hair is insured for $10,000.

I hear Capricorn and Aquarius do car commercials… in Japan.

 Cancer and Sagittarius’ favorite movie is Varsity Blues.

One time, Scorpio met John Stamos on a plane… and he told her she was pretty.

One time, Aries and Pisces punched me in the face… IT WAS AWESOME.

  • Utena: How do I begin to explain Juri Arisugawa?
  • Anthy: Juri Arisugawa is flawless.
  • Nanami: I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.
  • Miki: I hear she does clothes commercials...in France.
  • Shiori: Her favourite sport is fencing.
  • Touga: One time she met End of the World in a car.
  • Saionji: And he told her she was pretty.
  • Ruka: One time she slapped me in the face...it was awesome.
  • Tseng: Rufus Shinra... How do I begin to explain Rufus Shinra?
  • Elena: Rufus Shinra is flawless.
  • Reeve Tuesti: I hear his hair's insured for $10,000.
  • Heidegger: I hear he does car commercials... in Junon.
  • Scarlet: His favorite movie is Varsity Blues.
  • Rude: One time he met Tifa Lockheart on a plane...
  • Reno: - And she told him he was pretty.
  • Cloud Strife: One time he punched me in the face... it was awesome.

Miranda Shaw: Alex Parrish…How do I begin to explain Alex Parrish?
Shelby Wyatt: Alex Parrish is flawless.
Iris Chang: She has two Fendi purses and a silver Lexus.
Simon Asher: I hear her hair’s insured for $10,000.
Ryan Booth: I hear she does car commercials… In Japan.
Drew Perales: Her favorite movie is Varsity Blues.
Nimah Amin: One time she met John Stamos on a plane…
Raina Amin: - And he told her she was pretty.
Natalie: Vasquez: One time she punched me in the face… It was awesome.

  • Mahiru: Licht Jekylland Todoroki. How do I begin to explain Licht Jekylland Todoroki?
  • Crantz: Licht Jekylland Todoroki is flawless.
  • Guil: I hear his piano's insured for $ 10,000,000.
  • Sakuya: I hear he does car commercials... in America.
  • Lilac: His favorite movie is The Phantom of the Opera.
  • Tsubaki: One time he met Taylor Swift on a plane...
  • Higan: ...and she told him he was a great musician.
  • Hyde: One time he punched me in the face. It was awesome.
  • Chief Dooley: Peggy Carter... How do I begin to explain Peggy Carter?
  • Daniel Sousa: Peggy Carter is flawless.
  • Dottie Underwood: She has two personal handguns and her own brand of drugged lipstick.
  • Howard Stark: I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.
  • Angie Martinelli: I hear she does car commercials... In Japan.
  • Edwin Jarvis: Her favorite movie is anything with a strong female lead.
  • Ray Krzeminski: One time she met Captain America in the war...
  • Rose: - And he told her she was pretty.
  • Jack Thompson: One time she punched me in the face... It was awesome.
  • Alya: Chlóe is....How do I even begin to explain Chlóe?
  • Rose: Chlóe is flawless.
  • Alix: She has two Fendi purses and a silver Lexus.
  • Max: I hear her hair's insured for €10,000.
  • Mylène: I hear she does car commercials... in Japan.
  • Kim: Her favorite movie is Rendezvous in July.
  • Juleka: One time, she met Jean-Luc Godard on a plane.
  • Ivan: And he told her she was pretty.
  • Sabrina: One time, she punched me in the face. It was awesome.
  • Hendo: Emre, how do I begin to explain Emre?
  • Joe: Emre is flawless.
  • Lucas: I hear his hair is insured for £10,000.
  • Martin: I hear he does car commercials in Japan.
  • Kolo: His favourite movie is Die Hard.
  • Roberto: One time he met Angela Merkel on a plane...
  • Philippe: And she told him he was pretty.
  • Alberto: One time he punched me in the face...it was awesome.
Ladybug... How do I begin to explain Ladybug?
  • Alya: Ladybug is flawless.
  • Chloe: I hear her hair's insured for 10,000€.
  • Adrien: I hear she does car commercials... in Japan.
  • Nino: Her favourite movie is Varsity Blues.
  • Mylène: One time she met John Stamos on a plane...
  • Nathanaël: ...And he told her she was pretty.
  • Chat Noir: One time she punched me in the face... It was awesome!
The Demigods in:
  • Mean Girls
  • Percy Jackson: Annabeth Chase... How do I begin to explain Annabeth Chase?
  • Piper Mclean: Annabeth Chase is flawless.
  • Frank Zhang: I hear her hair's insured for $10,000.
  • Grover Underwood: I hear she does car commercials... in Camp Jupiter.
  • Jason Grace: Her favorite weapon is her bronze knife.
  • Travis Stoll: One time she met Artemis in Olympus...
  • Connor Stoll: - And she told her she could join the Hunters.
  • Percy Jackson: One time she judo-flipped me... it was awesome.

Modern AU - Cassandra Pentaghast

Cassandra… How do I begin to explain Cassandra?

Cassandra is flawless.  I hear her hair’s insured for 10,000sovereigns.  I hear she does car commercials… in Tevinter.  Her favorite movie is Varsity Blues.  One time she met the King of Ferelden on a plane and he told her she was pretty.  One time she punched me in the face… it was awesome.  But not really.  Except maybe that last one.

Okay, so actually she’s the Dean of Skyhold University. But she loves trashy romance novels and Mean Girls, and no one who knows that would dare make fun of her about it.