i haven't post this in a long time

omg, i s2g i figured riverdale’s mystery out

to summarize (sorry for repetition from other post but i wanted everything in one post): 

1. everyone keeps pointing out how similar archie and jason looked and were. they had more in common than sports; they were both tutored by ms grundy (pause for vom), they were both at the river. they both had red hair. archie was the intended target, and the killer is grundy’s husband. 

why? like i’ve said, i hated that plot to high hell but grundy did seem to be really genuinely afraid of him (assuming that was the truth), afraid that he’d do something terrible to her. if it was the truth and that’s why she changed her identity, then ostensibly he’s real dangerous. 

2. edit: it would be a huge realization for archie that he was a victim. he really assumed he was safe with grundy. that was actually something he reiterated many times—he knew what he was doing, he was safe, it was all his choice. but it wasn’t, right? he was manipulated by her, and completely preyed upon.

i think it would help archie realize that he was a victim and come to terms with the way she abused him emotionally as well as physically.

the original point didn’t come off right, so i edited it here to clarify.

it also makes sense because the only other people with motives to torture a kid for a week seemed to acquit themselves in the recent episode

polly has an alibi, the coopers genuinely seem like they didn’t do it (plus it’d be way too obvious), and the blossoms wouldn’t torture jason

3. we’re halfway through the season; if we haven’t met the killer yet i’d be surprised. if i’ve learned anything by doing meta and theories is how to structure pacing. the killer has to strike again, and it has to be someone we’ve seen; someone who’s a recurring character. all of the main characters seem innocent. 

so back to my first point, who’s the only lone character with those connections to grundy and archie, re: music? 

professor oscar castillo.

4. remember in 1x05 where he stiffened at the name “grundy” ? he said “the music teacher who left?” remember when he turned away and said something weird about the connection she clearly had with archie? how he clearly hated archie on sight? he’s grundy’s husband. 

the actor has been booked for a recurring role [x], and i’ll bet he was at the river that day, he thought jason was archie, but after he’d realized it wasn’t archie he couldn’t let jason leave. so he tortured him for information on grundy and archie and eventually shot jason, but now has to wait for the right time to strike again. 

it’s him. he did it. i’ll put money on it.

i wanted to draw some scenes from my Beauty and the Beast AU!!

i absolutely had to draw the snowball fight between Stan and the kids, haha. the second image is of everyone sitting in front of the fireplace, and Ford (as the journal) is telling them a story, while Dipper reads it aloud for everyone. the third is the ballroom sequence, and i changed around some of the colors here to fit the characters better.

my favorite is Stan’s transformation into a human again. i was itching to draw that scene for a while, and i’m really happy with how it came out!!

my second favorite is Stan embracing Ford. Ford, since he was stuck as a Journal for so many years, can’t really walk or use his limbs all that well. so rather than trip and fall on his way to Stan, he waited for Stan to make his way up to him. and Stan is just so relieved that his brother is back that, in a show of raw emotion, he just ran and held Ford as tightly as he could, while Dipper and Mabel run over to join them

the final image is of everyone just celebrating the fact that the curse is finally lifted. Mabel and Dipper are getting formally introduced to Ford (which is why they’re holding his hand), and Stan is helping hold Ford up to keep him from falling over

(Wendy’s design is by @cirilee and Soos’ design is by @soupery!!)

in “love”, men are very good at imitating the shape of a container but never its content, n this is at the crux of men’s near-literal emptiness

bc men think that the container is the content – stringing the right words together in the right order; performing the right gestures in the right contexts, n so on – n they can get really, really good at this! they can sound beautiful, enlightened, loving

but let me put it this way: U can train a dog to say “I love U” n it will be cute! every time he makes some yelping noise resembling it, U give him a treat – n maybe after a long while it’ll really sound like he is saying “I love U”, n U might even convince yrself that he knows what it means when he says it … or, at least, that he means it [that he loves U] n just doesn’t know he means it when he says it – but the fact is that he wants the fucking treat! n for all he knows that’s really the only pt of “saying” it – say the right thing the right way, get the treat – saying “I love U” has transactional value – I give U what U want, U give me what I want… n he doesn’t even have the beginning of an idea of what “I love U” means, or that it “means” anything at all!

so men view the value of these words, gestures, gifts, time spent n so on as currency to use in a transaction called love – n thru trial n error they learn from U which of these coin pieces are most valuable, n this is how they convince U that they love U n not just what they can get from U (which they conflate for themselves! they think they’re the same thing, n genuinely cannot tell the difference)

but men, hollowed out by masculinity, have relied on women (mothers, sisters, daughters, friends, lovers) to fill them up – they never learned what we had to learn as subjects of femininity: that the question of love is not “what can U do for me?” but ultimately, n endlessly “what can I do for U?” n that those gestures men bend n warp n hollow out to make into coins are actually meant to be expressions of that selflessness – are offerings

n when men are confronted w the truth abt love, abt its roots in sacrifice, in altruism, in martyrdom … that is, in femininity – they deny it, destroy it, or run as fast as they possibly can

concept: time doesn’t exist. you and i are sitting on a bed sharing a smoothie. you think you’re falling in love with me. you’re getting butterflies in your stomach. little do you know that i actually poisoned the smoothie and you start to choke. im running as fast i can with the Russian military yelling in my earpiece but i don’t speak Russian. i realize then that i had also poisoned myself. we are both yelling.

Chicken emoji reviews

Barely a chicken, the wattles aren’t even right and the comb is too smooth, a bad chicken 0/5

A very stout but good hen, i like their small comb and correct wattles, they look a bit scared tho with those white eyes 4/5

Strong and sharp! This hen reminds me of a dragon, could possibly be a cockatrice, so watch out! The wattles are wrong tho 3/5

The fuck is this, who gave this marshmallow a beak and two twigs for feet? Also those fake eyelashes and blush won’t fool anyone buddy -2/5

Very large and soft gal, tho her head is too small and that neck doesn’t quite look right, nor are the wattles correct 2/5 

That’s just an egg with a face drawn on it and a ribbon put on top, you didn’t even try, very bad -2/5

You tried, tho the wattles nor comb look right, combs don’t work like hair silly facebook 1/5

A better version of facebook’s attempt, this hen looks a bit confused tho, probably because it seems barely anyone can get a chicken’s wattles right 2/5

This abomination is out for blood, don’t let it stare at you for too long or it might attack you 0/5

A nicer version of twitter’s evil hen, simple and kinda cute but still incorrect, would put my trust into her tho to protect me from her more frightening cousin 3/5

Amazing, beautiful! The best looking one so far, almost perfect, has a great looking comb but their wattles and feet are a little lacking, i can look past that tho and this hen will keep you safe forever 5/5

My poor darling, what the fuck are you even?? That’s not a chicken, not in the slightest, and if it is then it has been deformed beyond repair, i feel sorry for whatever this thing is -3/5

4

Jongin for Esquire Korea 2017 Feb issue