They’re working a case with a pack of ghouls up in Oregon when Sam’s phone buzzes with a picture of a symbol, sketched out in white paint on a concrete floor. He blinks at it for a couple of seconds before he recognises it. Fifth pentacle of Mars. He smiles, despite himself; feels a glow spread over his cheeks. His phone vibrates again. You gotta admit it’s classy.
Sure, Sam texts back. And then, fingers tripping despite himself, I’m totally swooning here.
As soon as he sends it he’s seized all over with hot prickles of regret. Jeez. Like. Way to make it weird. First time he meets an, an interesting man in how many years, and he’s right in there with the inappropriate messaging. Jeez.
He doesn’t have too long to stew in his own embarrassment before the phone scoots sideways, rattling plastic against the table. You should see the pictures I send to the guys I really like.
Ouch, says Sam.
There’s a longer pause after this one: a real pause, maybe thirty or forty minutes. It’s enough time for Dean to get back from the diner down the street with two bags of takeout, flop down onto the bed nearest the door and eat fries all over it, wiping his fingers on the blanket.
“Dude,” Sam says. “How can you be such a neat freak at home and such a slob out here?”
“Not my castle, Sammy,” Dean says.
Sam rolls his eyes, digs into the bag Dean’s set down beside him. In what he’s choosing to read as an expression of thoughtfulness, his burger contains both lettuce and coleslaw. “Thanks,” he says, lifting it in Dean’s direction.
“No worries, dude,” says Dean, leaning forward with the remote control in his hand, flipping through channels on the fuzzy TV.
Sam looks at his phone. Nothing. Huh. It’s fine. Like. He’s
not sure what he was expecting. But there’s a little jab of disappointment in his stomach nonetheless.
He scrapes his chair backward, looks at what Dean’s watching. Wrestling. The burger is okay, a little tough. The coleslaw is good though, and the fries still not quite cold.
On the table, Sam’s cell buzzes again.
He puts down the half-eaten burger; wipes his hands on the greasy wrapper, which doesn’t much help. His fingers leave traces on the screen as he unlocks the phone.
It’s another picture, and if the first one, the pentacle, turned him pink and pleased he can feel himself flush head-to-toe red at what he’s seeing this time around. Um. Um, okay.
“Y’alright?” says Dean, looking up at him quizzically. Sam wonders if maybe he made some kind of noise, opening the text. He couldn’t swear that he hadn’t.
“Yeah,” he says, nodding at Dean. He drops his eyes to the screen again, feels himself turning redder. He feels suddenly very conscious of his own skin against his clothes. “Yeah, I’m fine.” He breathes, slow in and out, then gets to his feet, phone clasped what he hopes is inconspicuously in his hand. “I’m just. Uh. I’m just gonna.”
“Go wild,” says Dean, frowning at him. And yeah. Okay. He doesn’t usually ask Dean’s permission to use the bathroom.
“I’ll be back,” Sam says, escaping inside. Door locked, he puts his phone on the sink and bends over it to strip out of his shirt.
Often, I think Kaylor is real. But sometimes not. Because Taylor has dated TOO many boys. I mean: it's weird. I'm pretty sure that Karlie isn't bisexual but gay. And maybe Taylor is bisexual, not gay. I don't know. I'm confused. I've read her old songs about Joe, Taylor Lautner etc and I see a simple teenager who fall in love. Not a gay or bisexual girl
Ahh, I been there too a couple of times, I kinda understand why you feel confused but you’ve gotta realize that they aren’t gonna blatantly come out and talk about Kaylor being real, so we have to rely on practical deduction. Also, there are way too many pieces of evidence pointing towards Kaylor being real and you can’t just put all of that down as coincidence.
Taylor writing songs about those guys (speculation) has nothing to do with Kaylor, that was a really long time ago, man. (She even said once that she doesn’t need a relationship to write songs, I don’t have a link to it, but it’s somewhere on Tumblr).
She has def “dated” too many boys, but that isn’t hurting the Kaylor theory, is it? It’s helping us, because, for most parts, her “relationships” only lasted a few months and the guys she has dated either have gay rumors themselves, are relatively unknown to the GP, are too young for her, or too old for her, etc.
Look at how long some of her relationships were:
1. Harry Styles- 37 days
2. Joe Jonas- 16 months
3. Taylor Lautner- 3 months
4. John Mayer- 3 months
5. Conor Kennedy- 4 months
6. Calvin Harris- 15 months
7. Tom Hiddleston- 3 months
8. Jake Gyllenhaal- 3 months
With the exception of Joe J (who himself has had gay rumors) and Calvin H (the stunt buddy whose situation has been debunked through master posts), most of the “relationships” were three months long and highly publicized. ￼
Now tell me, why would a girl who’s supposedly dated a lot of guys say something like that? Unless she was closeted/ not straight/ in fake relationships.
Merry Christmas Woozi :) Do you want your present now?
You didn't have to get me a present
Well you spent time and effort into getting me one, so I got you one too! Besides, presents are the best way to show someone how much you care. Like you can point and say "hey man. I love you this many dollars worth". That's why I got you this really expensive music equipment! What'd you get me?
When people critique me, tell me I’m too buff , tell me to stop working out or I’ll look like a man , when society says that’s not attractive to have too many muscles , when mostly all the fitness magazines have tiny tiny girls on the cover with ribs sticking out making girls feel like that’s the only way to be beautiful , when all you want to do is share love & inspire & people have something terrible to say , when living becomes impossible without having a million insecurities. When the word “perfection” becomes Unreachable. Don’t aim for “their” definition of “perfection” aim for YOU’RE OWN. Just walk past them, get those #GAINS smile cause you got this & REMEMBER .. you are way too bomb 😍💪🏾 stand strong , freak the none sense & hate & negativity ! Almost 50 % of the world is unhappy & as sleep. Don’t forget what REALLY MATTERS. That’s LOVE ❤️ & all the greatest things & blessings will follow. Just show #LOVE & you are moving in the right direction. #qimmahtherapy #qflex #qimmahrusso #fitness
I just have a lot of feelings and headcanons about Young Viktor. Also the way he looked at Yuuri in episode 9 - he’s so in love it kills me.
When Viktor was seven he found a picture of a samurai. It was an advert in a magazine for some film he was far too young to see but even now, he remembered how fascinated he was by the main actor. He was beautiful with long hair and narrow features. From the moment he saw it, Viktor knew when he got older he would grow his hair out the exact same way. Then he’d be just as beautiful as the man in the picture. He remembered telling his mother his plan, excitedly waving the magazine in her face but all she did was throw it in the bin. Viktor never spoke to her about his hair again.
After the samurai incident, his relationship with his mother was never quite the same. She was constantly suspicious of his interests, forever showing him pictures of female models in magazines and quizzing him on them. Viktor could admit that the women were beautiful and for his mother that always seemed enough. But it wasn’t enough for Viktor. At fourteen he had almost the same length hair as his beloved samurai but he was yet to find someone he found as beautiful. While all the boys in his class were chasing after girls in skirts that were far too short as they wore more makeup than a clown, Viktor was infatuated with his Russian Literature teacher. He can’t remember his name anymore but he can still remember that he was tall, with dark eyes and even darker hair. Viktor can also remember how he spent far too many lessons fantasising about how it would feel to be pressed between that body and the hardwood desk in front of him. His knowledge of Russian literature has never recovered. It was on one of those days when Viktor noticed a picture of a figure skater on the desk he so badly wanted to be fucked on. As soon as he got home he asked his mother for money and visited an ice rink for the first time in his life.
Hi I was just wondering if you/any of your followers had experienced this-Sometimes after reading fanfic with strong sexual content I feel kinda guilty?? Like mainly with pwp stuff or fic where it's pretty explicit but I enjoy reading it at the time, and sometimes it turns me on but then afterward I sometimes feel really down and bad about myself. It's just very confusing and wondered if you had any advice bc you've always been pretty open about things and I don't have anyone to talk to irl x
Hi, friend! <333
First, I’m pretty sure you’re not alone in this - I think those sorts of reactions are pretty common, and a result of social conditioning and social embarrassment.
We get told and taught all the time - and this is especially true for women, though it is in many ways true for men too, in terms of the Stoic Man Myth - that pleasure is selfish. Admitting to desires and liking things, especially sexual things, is supposedly selfish - this is only about your pleasure, why aren’t you a better person, excessive passion is unseemly and unattractive, etc etc. Romance novels, women’s writing, erotica, fanfic: there’s a reason we laugh and say “guilty pleasure!” when we talk about those things, and that reason is because socially* we’re conditioned to think that these are somehow less valuable. And especially when it’s erotic and sensual - there really isn’t much media that encourages and explores and celebrates narratives of mutual unashamed sexuality, in fact I can’t really think of any outside, again, romance novels and fanfic (porn isn’t really about sex, which sounds odd to say, but you know what I mean; or rather, it’s only about the business of getting off, which makes it transactional and thus more acceptable in consumer culture).
So when we read and enjoy, say, that explicit kinky pwp Steve/Bucky or Erik/Charles** fic, which unblinkingly delights in the pleasures of the body - it is disconcerting for a moment, even as we enjoy it, because it requires a paradigm shift in terms of unspoken assumptions: yes, this is okay, this is good, we’re allowed to have this and feel this and write this and read this and fantasize about this, holy shit, guys, whoa.
And then we feel guilty about that, because it’s a cultural taboo to fully embrace one’s sensual pleasures without having to justify them somehow***.
Of course knowing that rationally doesn’t make the emotions go away, and that’s tricky. I’ve found that the more I read and then talk to other people about it (”hey, you read that Dom/sub Steve/Bucky with the kitty-play and the collar too?! I love that one! yeah, me too!”) the more that niggling sense of shame fades: it’s not weird or strange, or if it is we’re all weird together, not alone, and there are people who feel the same way you do, and if we’re all in it together then there’s not a lot of shame left to feel.
(Okay, there’s also sometimes the weird post-sex-scene hormone crash thing, like when you do a really good BDSM scene but you go really far under and your emotions get all screwed up and you need to level out, but that’s chemical, body chemistry, and any feelings of guilt or shame need to be addressed with cuddles and chocolate and hopefully a good Dominant or other partner for soothing.)
Does that sort of help? Other people, want to weigh in and help this anon? :-)
*for a given assumption about generally Westernized patriarchal societies, of course
**there’s another potential for the guilt factor involving RPF and real people, I’m aware, or indeed even involving the mental weirdness of ‘hey, I’m getting off on this fantasy of fictional characters, RPF or not’ - but, again: are you liking it? is it hurting anyone? if the answers are yes and no respectively, then intellectually it’s all good, though emotionally that can be trickier to get past, of course!
***and depending on the fic, some of the kinks etc may also be cultural taboos, which adds a layer of guilt: knowing that society would not approve. But that’s what this wild and woolly world of fandom’s for - finding your tribe.
Sorry I’ve been awol. I still love Thor and Loki… still have way, way too many fics I need to write (and get super emotional when I think about them)… my only ‘trouble’ is that while I used to very strongly feel for Loki, back when I was uber depressed and found the self-destruction #relatable, now I relate to an ace bald man and his gay robot companion. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Nothing compares to Thorki fandom, tho. I’ve missed you guys. What’s up?
Ok, so, I’ve gotten this ask multiple times, so I will attempt to answer this question. Disclaimer: I am not a nonbinary trans man. I’m simply relating what I’ve heard other people say.
The question is: How can you be both nonbinary and a trans man?
1. I have personally seen many people who identify primarily as nonbinary also identify as trans male because of what they want to do transition-wise. Sometimes it’s because it’s too hard to get a T referral, join binder giveaways and get surgeries unless you say you’re a trans man.
2. Sometimes people identify that way because the person genuinely feels like they can be masculine-aligned whilst still not gendering themselves, and because they were DFAB, they refer to this as being nonbinary and a transgender male. Others refer to this as being nonbinary trans masculine.
3. Some people feel that binary refers only to cisgender male and female people, and that being transgender at all means being nonbinary.
4. Some trans men prefer gender neutral pronouns and language, and therefore refer to themselves an nonbinary. Pronouns and gender aren’t always linked in the same ways for all people.
Those are just some of the possible explanations. I welcome knowledge from those who identify as nonbinary trans men.
Hirst has been wrong in many, many things, but here is an example of how good he can be when he understands and respects his characters.
Honestly, I have been a bit disappointed this episode has not been rated a solid A+, that many people have been left cold by “fantasy” or feeling that the series is making too much an effort to compensate for Ragnar´s death.
No.They don´t get it. Our world has lost touch with the Divine, not theirs. They believed in a way we cannot fully understand.
Ragnar was sincere when talking with Ecbert about how he had concluded Gods were men´s creation and that he would just give a speach on his last moments about Valhalla for his children. The blind man saw through Ragnar, and Ragnar through him. By the time he was about to die, in that cage, Ragnar told everyone how he would wait for his sons to join him in Valhalla. It was a last man´s wish.
PS: The Odin we saw was closer to “ reality” than Marvel´s IMO.
I don’t feel the same. Cliche, I know- but I am not the same woman who accepted a few too many drinks from a sketchy man in a rural bar, I am no longer the woman who turns her head the other way and seals her lips, I am no longer the pushover who bent to the every demand of people who never mattered. I am a new woman, a stronger and smarter woman, and I have them to thank for that.
I hate him, I hate the way his name rolls off the tip of my tongue and the coldness that I feel when his name is mentioned. I hate his arrogance and his charm, his manipulative intelligence, and his envious behavior. There was nothing alluring, nothing enticing about a power hungry, sociopathic criminal with a winning smirk and a height advantage. I do not fear him, nor his violent tendencies, dangerous connections or fractured reality. I despise him, but I do not fear him, because I know him. I understand his crooked motives, and I know of his morals, or lack there of.
I do not know her. I do not know what it is that makes me shiver when her name is mentioned, or cower in her presence. I do not know why she is so intimidating. I do not know the extent of her cruelty, or how far she will go. I do not know what drives her to do the things she does, what gets her out of bed every morning. I fear her, because I do not know her. I do not understand her, nor how she can be so blank but emit such a bare intensity, how she is so influential despite her silence, how she is so infamous but so spotless. I know of her, but I do not know her and this frightens me.
One final confession: I have a stupid crush on you. I have no idea how to deal with it, because, there's no good or logical reason to pursue it, taking situations, and feelings into account. It's just there, and stupid, and extraordinarily annoying.
Aw, man, crushes like that are so frustrating. (I mean, for you, not me. I’ve been on that side of it way too many times.)
I can’t really think of anything to say that doesn’t come off as super-self-deprecating or super-egotistical. But yeah. I totally get how frustrating that is. Sorry!
2. Lipstick or chapstick: Lip gloss! It is shiny and pretty! though I will wear lipstick. And I rather need chapstick, especially in winter
3. Last song I listened to: “Forever Yours” by Nightwish
4. Top three shows: I have many favorites but I shall list the ones I am currently watching: Sherlock, The Man in the High Castle, and Attack on Titan
5. Top three characters: HAH…well how about some new faves? Eren Yeager, Mikasa Ackerman and Armin Arlert
6. Top 3 ships: Again I have way too many. But some current faves are Cassian Andor and Jyn Erso, the aforementioned Eren and Mikasa, and well, Eli Bennet and Darcy (if you are confused by this last go on ao3 and read the Pride and Prejudice au “Fixing on the Hour” by @thelonelybrilliance, or TolkienGirl)
I feel like I may have answered these questions recently?? So I won’t tag anyone but if you see this and haven’t done it you should! <3
For reals though, I am fighting the urge to write fanfiction. I have so many feels after watching YOI I just wanna write, but I have WAY too many wip on my plate and I know fuck all about ice skating haha but oh man, I wanna write!!
Luckily I’m seeing Rogue One in a couple of hours so I’ll be distracted =)