i have this same effect on women

Things I Love about Wonder Woman

- Little Diana. Basically every scene with little Diana

- The fact that there are Amazons with different race, age, and body type

- the training montage

- “I’m going, Mother”

- “Who would I be if I stay?”

- The sex talk. “Men are important in procreation, but for pleasure, unnecessary.” And Steve’s reaction to that.

- “To the war!”

- The horrified look that one lady gives Diana when she’s trying out outfits

- the fact that war is shown to be bloody, horrifying, and painful

- Diana’s team is not all white. There’s native American and Latino. And the white one is Scottish

- The entire No Man’s Land scene

- “That’s what I’m going to do”

- PTSD, racism, and colonialism is shown. Not just a mention of it, but showing what those can do to people and the effects of those.

- Diana checking out that woman’s size. I love how this shoes that not all women have the same size. I love how this shows that a dress that might fit one, doesn’t necessarily means it would fit others.

- Diana’s realization that humans does horrible things by themselves, not because of Ares’ influence, and her refusing to fight because of that

- Steve’s sacrifice

-Diana’s compassion for dr. Poison

- “Goodbye, Brother”

- That last scene of Diana flying out

- The fact that I didn’t have to see women being sexualized in this movie

- The fact that Diana can be strong, beautiful, smart, and powerful without a man being better than her and the fact that this movie made me realize that women, that I, can be strong, beautiful, smart, and powerful

So You Think You’re Not Racist

Alternate title: “Levels of Racism: Why White Fans and Creators Have a Responsibility to Confront Our Biases”

So here’s a thing I’ve been thinking about for a while. I’m pretty sure it’s nothing new and if anyone knows of resources written by Black people that address this, please send me the info because I definitely want to read them. 

(Also if I’ve misstepped or misspoken in any way, please let me know. Criticism is welcome.)

Part of the difficulty of discussing racism, particularly with other white people, is that we don’t actually think about the same thing when we talk about racism. The way I see it, there are three levels:

  1. Individual beliefs and actions that are rooted in racial prejudice
  2. Subconscious racial bias that comes from socialization
  3. Systemic racism enshrined in institutions of power

There are probably more in between, and obviously these aren’t strict black and white categories; there’s a lot of overlap and blurred lines involved. I don’t know if any particular level is worse than the others, and I don’t think I’m qualified to speak on that. But I think these work well as large bucket categories.

The problem is that often people are talking about different levels without actually realizing it. When I try to get my parents to understand why level 2 might lead them to judge Colin Kaepernick’s method of protest unfairly, they respond as if I’ve accused them of level 1 racism. When I tell my coworker that I don’t like the Bruins because the crowd booed PK Subban every time he had the puck, I can tell he’s desperately trying to come up with a reason other than race because he doesn’t want to accuse an entire stadium of people of being level 1 racists, when really the problem is probably a mix of 1 & 2.

And obviously, they’re all bad. They’re all racism and we should fight against all of them. But I think we have to fight against the different levels in different ways, which is why people get frustrated with these conversations.

Keep reading

so far all the people (mainly women??? like what the fuck) arguing against jaal being patched in as bi are literally saying they don’t want men to touch him because if they do they will ruin him and it’s disgusting

“it will change him” ; “he doesn’t need to be questioning his sexuality” ; “it would make his romance a trope” ; “he’s perfect already” ; “it affects me[a woman] negatively because i[a woman] love his character as it is” ; “he was written for girls” ; “[jaal can’t be bi because] he treats sara in a way he wouldn’t treat scott”

just admit that you’re selfish and don’t care about the hurt feelings of a large group of gamers who were baited and teased and deceived into thinking they could have something they’ve been hoping for since the beginning. that you don’t have empathy for trans men who can’t romance the ONLY male alien squadmate that almost everyone(including game reviewers and scott ryder’s fucking va) genuinely expected to be available to all without inducing dysphoria. that you think just because women don’t get the same lion’s share as straight men that you have the right to deny mlm the love and cherishment and inclusion that they have been begging for–that they deserve– for so long. bi jaal takes NOTHING away from women. it just gives something back to men.

to the ppl who think like this, you’re not advocating for maintaining straight jaal, you’re advocating for the silence of mlm and that’s not okay

Pro-tips on writing / drawing trans characters: Not all trans guys have double incision scars. Not all trans men have wide hips. Not all trans men are short. Not all trans women are tall. Not all trans women have wide shoulders and narrow hips. Not all trans women have strong jawlines. Not all trans women have penises. Not all trans men have vaginas / no penis. Not all trans people, even the ones on hormones, are infertile. Not all trans people have transitioned. Not all trans people transition at the same age. Hormones effect the body differently depending on what age you start them. 

Unless you’re a trans person doing it for body positivity / as a coping mechanism for dysphoria, drawing every single one of your trans characters with the same traits will make me raise an eyebrow. Like, if I look at your art and you have a bunch of trans male headcanon art and every single one of them has DI scars and wide hips, I’ll be definitely going “Hmm” before thinking you’re a dumbass and clicking out of your blog.

Male privilege & a basket of tampons

Years ago, a friend went to a party, and something bothered him enough to rant to me about it later. And it bothered me that he was so incensed about it, but I couldn’t put my finger on why. It seemed so petty for him to be upset, and even more so for me to be annoyed with him.

Recently, something reminded me of that scenario, and it made more sense. I’ll explain.

The party was a house party. One of those parties people throw if they’re renting a good-sized house in college. You know the type—loud music, Solo cups of beer, and somebody doing something drunk and stupid before the end of the night.

At some point, my friend had occasion to use the bathroom. When he went into the bathroom, he was disgusted to see that the hostess had left a basket of feminine hygiene products on the counter for guests to use if needed.

Later, when my friend told me about it, he wrinkled his nose and said, “Why would she do that? Guys don’t want to see that!”

When I suggested that she was just making them available in case a woman needed them, he insisted that they could be left in the cabinet or under the counter. Out of sight, anyway.

I wish I’d had, at the time, the ability to articulate what I can now.

To me, this situation is, while relatively benign, a perfect example of male privilege.

A man walks into the bathroom and sees a reminder that women have periods. And he’s disgusted. He wants that evidence hidden away because it offends his senses. How dare the hostess so blatantly present tampons and pads where a man might see them? There’s no reason for that!

A woman walks into the bathroom and sees that the hostess is being extra considerate. She gets it. She knows what it’s like to have a period start unexpectedly. The feeling of horror because she’s probably wearing something she doesn’t want ruined—it is a party after all. The sick embarrassment because someone might notice, especially if she’s wearing light-colored clothes, or worse, sat on the hostess’s white couch. The self-conscious, semi-nauseated feeling of trying to get through a social event after you’ve exhausted every avenue to get your hands on an emergency pad or tampon, and you’re just hoping to God that if you tie your jacket around your waist—you brought one, right?—keep your back to a wall, clench your buttcheeks, squeeze your thighs tightly together, and don’t…move…at…all—you might get through the evening, bow out gracefully, and find an all-night convenience store with a public restroom.

Or maybe she came to the party during her period, but didn’t bargain for her flow to suddenly get that heavy. Or she desperately needs a tampon, but her purse is in a room where a couple is not to be disturbed. Maybe she doesn’t know the hostess well enough to ask if she can use one. Or she doesn’t know anyone at the party well enough to ask. Or she figures she can make do with some wadded up toilet paper or something.

Whatever the case, she walks into the bathroom, and she hears the hostess saying “Hey, I know what it’s like, and just in case, I’ve got your back.”  She sees someone saving her from what could be a minor annoyance or a major embarrassment.

The hostess gets it. The woman who just walked into the bathroom? She’s either going to see that the person throwing the party is super considerate, or she’s going to be whispering thanks to Jesus, Krishna, and whoever else is listening because that is a basket full of social saviors.

But to the guy who wrinkled his nose, it’s still offensive that those terrible little things are on the counter, reminding his delicate sensibilities that the playground part of a woman is occasionally unavailable due to a gross bodily function that he should never have to think about.

In the grand scheme of things, it’s a tiny thing. It’s a tiny annoyance for the man, and a more significant but relatively tiny courtesy for the woman. After all these years, my friend has probably forgotten, but I never have.  As a woman whose life is partially governed by a fickle uterus that can ruin an evening faster than a submerged iPhone, his story has stuck with me.

How can you be so offended by a small gesture that has zero effect on you, but could make such an enormous difference to the person who needs it?

It occurs to me now that this is a small but effective illustration of how men and women see the world. It’s part of the same thought process that measures a woman’s value through her bra size and her willingness to have sex with him—that everything about us is displayed or hidden based on how men perceive them or what he wants to get from us. Unattractive women should be as covered as possible, while attractive ones shouldn’t be hiding their assets from male eyes (or hands, or anything else he wishes to use).

A woman who isn’t smiling is an affront to him because it detracts from her prettiness, despite the fact that there might be a legitimate reason for her not to smile (or more to the point, that there isn’t a legitimate reason for her to smile). Her emotional state is irrelevant because she’s not being pretty. It’s the line of thinking where a man blames anything other than cheerful sexual consent on the woman being a bitch, being a lesbian, or—naturally—being on her period. Everything we do, from our facial expressions to our use of hygiene products, are filtered through the lens of “how it looks to a man.”

It’s the line of thinking where a small gesture from one woman to another, an assurance that someone else understands and will help her without question or judgment, a gesture which could save a woman’s evening from being ruined, is trumped by a man’s desire to see an untainted landscape of pretty, smiling women with visible cleavage and vaginas that never bleed.

And people wonder why we still need feminism.

anonymous asked:

As an external observer, I'm curious: what's something you really enjoy about Critical Role?

Oh dang, this is a big one. The really big thing for me was, weirdly enough, holy shit there are women in this. There’s a lot of “geeky” media I consume that I really enjoy, and a lot of it goes seriously above and beyond in terms of caring about people and having a good attitude… but it still hits a barrier of inclusivity for me (just as I’m sure CR hits other folks’ barriers for different reasons) because holy moly, holy mackerel, holy jeez oh man oh gosh, there are almost never any women in ‘em. More to the point, there are practically no women over the age of 30 in ‘em.

I’ve been semi-keeping tabs for a while, now, and I’d say the folks who follow me on fannish social media probably average in age around 18 or 19—probably pretty typical for fandom spaces. The “mutuals” I follow on tumblr, by which I mean the folks I interact with frequently, are generally in their mid-30s (I’m 29—lots of us grew up through fandom together over the past decade or so). One of the reasons I came back to fandom as an older teen after dipping my toe in as a wee one was this feeling of, holy shit, women in their 30s and 40s and 50s and 60s and beyond have hobbies

I mean, older dudes get hobbies. Older dudes get “mancaves” and hang out playing video games and having a beer and being goofy and, yeah, acting like kids. But that image of the future is just a big ol’ void of “well, you have to grow up eventually” for a lot of women who genuinely enjoy geeky stuff, and there’s this unfortunate rippling effect where many teenage fans on spaces like tumblr regard older female fans with pity or contempt… at the same time as they fan themselves over the 40-something inoffensive stubble-bro du jour who watches the same geeky TV shows they do. I love finding older women in fannish spaces for the same reason I relish running into the incredibly rare older women in my field of work: for a shining moment, I see a future that looks a lot like who I wanna be.

This is all a roundabout way of saying how much it meant (and continues to mean!) to tune into this incredibly geeky premise of a show, where the participants weren’t just playing D&D, they’d been playing for years together and the cameras were a recent addition, and hey, what the heck, there’s women my age and older getting all excited over a good roll of the dice and telling an amazing story and just plain forgetting the cameras are rolling. Being goofballs! Do you know how hard it is to find media in which women over the age of 25 are allowed to be goofballs? Not written that way to impress the dudes on set or the dudes in the audience, just straight-up being goofy? The aggressively unscripted nature of this show brings that out so nicely.

Zahra remains one of my all-time favorite CR characters in large part because, hey, here’s Mary Elizabeth McGlynn playing D&D for the very first time in her late 40s… and she knocks it the heck outta the park, returns in a recurring role over the years, gets her friends hooked, and starts playing a game at home. That means something to me in a really, really visceral way. Not only are women older than me allowed to have hobbies, they’re allowed to pick up new ones. It shouldn’t be a surprise, it should be the most ordinary thing in the world.

But damn, that feels good to see.

2

What made you decide to write Unfiltered? “I think social media, especially Instagram, had a really big effect. This incredibly supportive, encouraging community of young women formed around my Instagram account where they would tell each other, including me, about their inner-most thoughts, insecurities, and experiences. They’d have their photos next to their stories. They weren’t being anonymous, they were just being extremely brave. They’d always preface it by saying “even though I probably couldn’t relate to their story, blah blah blah.“ I would always think, “Ugh, no. I’ve been there. I am there. I go through the same things you guys do, but I guess I’ve just never really talked about it.”

Imagine you and your wife want a baby...

Note: This is a lesbian semi rapid pregnancy fluff story. I love rapid pregnancy stories but I only like fluffy, sweet stories where the growth is noticeable, but not violent or taking place over the span of a few seconds. I also like set up and some sweet character interactions. This is my first short story like this so I hope everyone enjoys, but please leave criticism if you feel like it is needed.

—–

You and your wife Sarah are dropped off by the taxi, and you unload your bags. The sunrise has just started, the sky is a light purple that the orange is just starting to fade in. The salty beach air rushes by you; it has been 7 years since your honeymoon you went to the beach. You’re here over the 4 day weekend at The Agency for Parenthood. You saw advertised that over the span of 4 days all the proper arrangements can be made to where you can go home with a healthy baby. Over the phone there wasn’t information given, just the travel arrangements were made. You and your wife had always wanted to raise a family, but it is harder to do so naturally being a lesbian couple. But in only 4 days? Maybe it’s an adoption agency where you meet with the expectant mother and get matched over the weekend. They figured they would go along, it was a beach resort and if they didn’t like it they could get a hotel and just have a relaxing weekend together away from the bustling city. You see other couples getting their stuff together to go inside.

An employee rushes over and helps to gather your belongings. Your items are taken to the suite where you will be staying in, you have been instructed to go to the auditorium to await further instructions. The facility is top notch, 5 stars. The building was alabaster white, marble floors, and wide windows facing the glistening, emerald green ocean and sandy shores. Immediately upon entering you smell savory food, assuming an open buffet must be nearby. This place looks fantastic! You do see several pregnant women waddling around in various stages of pregnancy. Some are in their swimsuits, their swollen, glowing bodies are barely contained by the fabric, leaving through the glass large doors to enjoy the beach. You whisper to Sarah how exciting it will be to get to know these ladies and hopefully be matched. You brought a scrapbook with photos of their life at home just in case they needed to present themselves.

You both find your seats in the auditorium, there is about 50 or so seats. Other couples find their way in and after an hour the room is filled with small chatter. The doors close, the lights dim, and just the small stage has light. After a few moments a middle aged woman, walks into the stage, wearing a large white lab coat over her black pants suit.

“Good morning everyone! I am Dr. Abagail Harris, founder of The Agency of Parenthood. I hope you find our accommodations acceptable during your stay here.” She continues to go over some basic rules of the facility, like where certain locations are on the campus, services provided, and emergency protocol. The audience grows restless.

“Now, the question you all have: how does all over this work? You all have one thing in common, you all want to start a family.” You and the audience start to quiet down to listen carefully.

“You might think upon seeing our other clients here that this is an adoption agency. That is not the case, your children will be biologically yours. The medical technology I have here is highly coveted by certain unscrupulous groups, so please understand the secrecy up to this point.” While there was background chatter during the other parts of the presentation, the audience is now deathly quiet, awaiting to hear what will happen.

Dr. Harris pauses for dramatic effect, smiling wide. “I know we have several same sex couples here, and the child will be biological from both of you as well” Sarah squeezes your hand, you look over and she has a grin as big as the moment you proposed to her all those years ago. You squeeze back, feeling the engagement ring on her finger you gave her and continue to listen.

“This is a type of fertility treatment we have here. But we know a lot of you are busy business men and women. You have planes to catch, meetings to secure multi million dollar deals across the globe next week. Do not fear, your busy lives will not be on hold the next 9 months. You can leave with a biological child of your own in 4 days. I have pioneered technology to expedite the pregnancy, to better accommodate the lifestyle of the 21st century family.” You and the audience gasps in awe at the news.

Dr. Harris starts to giggle a little bit. “Don’t worry, it is completely safe. You saw our other clients as you entered, they are enjoying the sugar sand beaches, splashing in the cool ocean. We have only the best doctors medical staff the world has to offer. If there was a medical emergency, which hasn’t happened in the 10 years we have been open…” She knocks on a wooden support beam for the stage for comedic effect “…we do have a full operatory room that our staff is trained to handle any emergency. In fact, our first patient is yours truely.” Behind her on the projection screen is a collage of photos, a younger Dr. Harris in various stages of pregnancy, then a group photo of her family that includes 6 children. “I did not open this facility until I had proof of the technology. I found out I was infertile when I first got married and I feared I could never have a family. My lifes work has been bringing children into the world that otherwise could not be here. No medical condition can hold you back from having a family.”

The audience is now beyond excited, you can hear all the couples whispering to each other, smiles across the audience. You give Sarah a peck on the cheek. You feel her cheek wet from tears of joy. You wrap your arm around her shoulders, holding her firm.

“My staff will answer more specific questions you may have during the medical exam, which is where you will be going next. It’s going to be a busy next few days, so no time to waste!“ She waved to the audience and the back doors opened on cue.

During her presentation the white lab coat seemed to unbutton. As she was walking off stage, the jacket swept to her sides and behind her. You notice the pale skin of her round stomach peek out from under her black blouse, obviously not meant as a maternity shirt. She hurriedly tucked it back down a few moments later when she realized it. You giggle to yourself, it seems that Dr. Harris isn’t even done adding to her family. You hold Sarah hand as you make your way out.

As everyone leaves the auditorium, there are medical staff with signs each having a different surname on them. You find your family name and are greeted by Mary, your personal nurse and guide over the weekend. She is young, no older than 25. She is just about your height, 5'1”. Her black, long hair and dark skin contrasts with the white lab coat she is wearing. She walks the both of you into a small medical room down a branching hallway and begins to go over each of your health history.

As she concludes the basic medical exam, Mary starts going over the fertility treatment: DNA will be collected from the couple and a zygote will be created using the medical technology at hand. She continues “…and as both of you are women, you have an unique situation. If you want, you can have twins that each of you carry.” You look at Sarahs big brown eyes in excitement. You both have always wanted to have the experience of pregnancy. “The advantage of this is that you can carry one of the twins without the additional bodily stresses that having multiples cause.” That also sounded good.

You have a twin brother and you did always hope to replicate the experience of being a twin with your own child. After some discussion, you both decide that this might be the only time you will be able to do this and agree to each carry a child.

“And like Dr. Harris said, this is completely safe.” Mary pulls out her cell phone and shows you photos of her heavily pregnant, the photo dated just last weekend! The next photo she shows is of her 3 beautiful children, one of them a little girl only a few days old. “Each and every medical staff member is required to have completed the treatment as well, so we can best answer your questions. And yes, my lovely little Emily there was brought into the world last week!” You would of never guessed that she would recover physically so quickly. But then again Dr. Harris is working on child number 7, the process must be easy.

Mary continues “Each of the 40 weeks of pregnancy have been reduced to 40 hours. Within 2 days the fertilized egg will form into a fully formed baby. The 3rd day must stay at the last stage of pregnancy, this stage helps decelerate the fetal growth so they don’t continue to grow rapidly after they are born. The final day here after birth is preparing for the journey home and making vital purchases for the new family member. We will provide  what you will need for the first month. Tomorrow morning you will have an ultrasound to determine the gender of the children, then you will meet with our nursery specialists to have a fully stocked nursery installed in your home while you are here…well…” Mary pats at her currently slim stomach. “…becoming fully stocked yourself.” You all giggle at the joke, but it is also a little nervous sounding as the two of you are slowly taking in the reality of the situation.

There are two medical exam tables in this room. Mary instructs you both to get on one after you disrobe. She leaves the room gather equipment. You both start to take off your clothes and place them in the basket provided. You take an extra long glance at Sarah, she is just as beautiful as the day you met 10 years ago. She is about 4 inches taller than you and is dark as midnight. People tease that the two of you are like night and day since you look polar opposites. The bright lights from the lamps reflect off her skin like shooting stars across the night sky. Sarah has always been a little self conscious of carrying an extra 20 pounds than what she would like, but you find her curves soft and lovely. You have been jealous, yourself always small and petite, always struggling to keep weight on. You try to imagine her with child; her chubby belly that you love to play with, instead full and tight, her belly button popped out from the growing child. Her breasts swelling past their modest handful, you imagine them spilling out the sides of your hands as you gently tease her enlarged, even darker nipples. You then realize that you too would be full figured in every way soon, no longer small and frail. Your heart races, you cannot control your imagination. Firm, swollen round bellys rubbing against each other as you try to hug each other. The only thing that snaps you out of it is the knock on the door. Mary is announcing her return to start the process. You look at Sarah and she seems flustered too, blushing.

“It seems we were having simular thoughts…” She walks over to you and gives you a gentle kiss as she helps you finish undressing, slipping the loose jeggings and tank top off. She slowly rubs your bare stomach, then kisses you on the cheek. Sarah and you hop on the tables and cover yourself with the thin paper blankets provides. Sarah shouts that you both are ready for her to enter.

Mary wheels in various equipment and about 3 other medical staff follow behind. Mary is starting up the equipment as she proceeds to discuss the next steps. “For this part of proceedure you must be placed under general anesthesia for the next 6 hours, the DNA samples can be uncomfortable to gather. Once we place the fertilized eggs in your womb, any movement can disrupt impregnation since this is such a delicate process. You will awaken when we confirm that impregnation was successful. At that point you can proceed to enjoy the next 3 days at your leasure.” You see various other medical equipment being wheeled all around you, the staff placing the sensors on you and Sarah. You feel the pinches of multiple needles being placed in your arms, attached to multiple IV bags. Your heart is now racing from being nervous. This is happening. You see Sarah hand reach out to hold yours, also connected to IV bags. You grasp her hand firmly, feeling with her engagement ring again.  Mary starts counting backwards as you both go under.

“I love you Sarah.” You say shakily. You look into her eyes, wet from tears of excitement. Her full lips start to open to respond but the darkness of sleep pulls you under before you can hear her response.

—–6:34 PM——

You awaken slowly, blinking in and out on consciousness for what seems forever. The bright lights are like staring into the sun, you rub your eyes as you come to. You gain enough awareness to look around for Sarah. She is putting on her sundress, appearing to have awoken much sooner than you. You see that the IV needles are gone, replaced with band aids. You notice a watch on your left wrist. It says 4:41, but that can’t be right if you were under for 6 hours…

Mary speaks from behind you. “Good evening! Everything was a stunning success!” You struggle to sit up, but manage to do so with help from Mary. You look down at your belly, still flat. You then realize the paper blanket has been removed and you curl up, embarrassed from being stark naked.

“Oh, don’t worry about that, we see naked women all the time. But I understand how you feel.” She reaches for the clothes basket and hands you the floral tank top and denim jeggings you wore in. She turns around to let you clothe yourself. She continues to explain while turned around.

“You both have been pregnant for 4 hours at this point. So this is just like the fourth week of pregnancy. You each have a watch, timed to the exact moment when the pregnancy started.” You look at the watch just after slipping on your tank top and just as she said, it says 4:42. Makes sense now. The tank top has a built in bra shelf that for your small, just barely there breasts fit into. Honestly if anything it’s still too big and the shirt is an extra small already. “This will count up to 40 hours, when gestation will suspend for a whole day to stop the accellerated growth. Wouldn’t want your bouncing babies to grow up too fast, they already do at a natural pace!”

You finish zipping up your jeans, which you do notice are a tiny little tighter than usual. Before if anything stuck out it was your hip bones. Now the hip bones are hidden away like you have always wanted them to be. You do finally realize that you are absolutely famished! You hear Sarah stomach growl from the other side of the room. Laughing, you walk over and reach for your wife’s hand. You both are grinning from ear to ear.

“Now, you will be growing at an unnatural pace, so I would recommend heading up to your rooms and slipping into something more..accommodating. The buffet is open 24/7, so feel free to eat up! The typical week that you start to show is around 12, so around 2 in the morning is when you’ll actually start filling out in the middle. You’ll be a whole different person when you wake up tomorrow morning!”

Mary opens the door and gives you your room  key, room 245. She gives you directions on how to get there, the resort being so huge. Hand in hand, you both walk out and enter the main lobby area where people are heading for dinner. It smells so wonderful, your mouth starts to fill with saliva.

“Since our room is at the other end of the resort, let’s go ahead and grab some chow!” Sarah pats her soft tummy “Afterall, we are eating for 4 now.”

You enter the dining room and immediately taken back at the sheer amount of food. A huge buffet line with every kind of food you can think of, staff restocking the popular items. You see all around couples having dinner. The women early in their pregnancy are all along the buffet line getting their food, while you see all the women very full with child sitting down at the tables, their husbands and  not pregnant spouses getting them probably their third plate of food. You look over at each others bodies and realize this will be us in just a day! You both make your way to the buffet line and fill up your plates.

You find a table with a couple you sat next to during the presentation. They wave you down and you both take a seat. As you are seated, your jeans dig into your sides and stomach. You do your best to adjust them to make yourself comfortable.

You spend hours talking and eating with the couple. Their names are Justin and Darlene, a husband and wife CEO team for a business software company. Over the years they could never concieve a child naturally, but 2 years ago they had their first child thanks to The Agency for Parenthood. They hired a babysitter for their son and they hope for a daughter to complete their family. Sarah, being the more social one, fills them in on your story. You add in important details as needed, but between the bites you gaze on Sarah and are reminded of why beyond her beauty you fell in love with her; her ability to start a conversation with anyone is how she met you. You wish you had the gift of the gab like her, but you also just love the melody of her voice as she spins tales of their adventurous early years of your marriage.

The hours passes by, eating plate and plate of delicious food: mac and cheese, glazed ham, steak, biscuts, nearly everything at least once! You wish you thought ahead like Sarah and worn a dress, your pants are just aching to be off at this point, you feel the b pants digging in. You try to adjust them and now there is a quite noticeable, but small still, fat spilling out all around the belt of jeggings. You reach your hand feel your skin over your belt line, its soft, just fat; not the firm, small round belly you hope to be sporting when you wake up tomorrow morning. But this is the most you ever filled out any item of clothing. You guess you might actually fit a size 1 currently instead of the 00 you typical have to wear. After laughs and sharing stories, photos on your phone of your pets and family, it is nearly 9pm and you both figure it is time to get ready for bed. You both ate so much food, your body is busy digesting it and is begging for sleep. You all give hugs and look forward to seeing them on campus tomorrow, excited to share upcoming baby bumps!

You leave the dining hall and make it to your room. It’s a solid 10 minute walk, you paid extra for a suite that overlooks the ocean, but with that comes extra walking to get such a remote room. You hold your wife’s hand and head down the hallways. You pass by some night owl couples who prefer moonlight to sunlight and making their way out now. You see one couple, both of them probably 30 hours into their pregnancies, heading out to the beach, hand on the smalls of their back for support, for what little of a moonlight beach waddle they can do. Their swimsuits can barely contain their newly formed bodies, breasts overflowing the bikini tops, the bottoms barely covering the nessary parts, being stretched as their hips obviously has widened signifigantly to house their evergrowing children. Their sway backwards to accomodate the new center of gravity matches the palm trees against the ocean wind, bending back as well. Their free hand is rubbing each other’s swollen tummys. Even though it is night, those women are glowing like the sun. You smile and make a mental note to take Sarah out on a night walk while here.

You do notice as you walk that there is a little bit more of jiggle to your breasts as you take your steps. Your breasts before were barely a size A cup, not even enough to jiggle even if you jumped. The built in bra for your top is struggling to support your breasts, now easily large enough where they have their own independent movement. You have never experienced this before and now understand why large breasted women are always complaining about bras with no support. As you walk, the skin of your swollen breasts tug down slightly with each step, causing some discomfort. Not as uncomfortable as the jeans though, they have to get off the moment you enter the room! All the buttered crab legs and thick lobster bisque you ate is finding their place on your body quicker than you expected. Your free hand goes to your hips; you now have what they jokingly call a muffin top. As you walk your breasts jiggle with your new expanded waist.

Your room is finally found and you enter. Sarah barely closes the door behind her before you take off your top. You feel the bounce of your breasts as the bra frees them, you feel them move for a small moment before they settle. You start to unbutton your pants and work your fingers to the zipper, but immediately forces itself open before you could even begin. You let out a sigh of relief. You brushed against your belly while your hand was undoing the button. Is it just you or does your belly already feel a bit firmer, a little more rounded? Can’t be, you look a your watch and it’s only hour 7, way sooner than the typical week you start to show. Sarah walks over to help you undress, she rubs her fingers along the red imprints from where your jeans were digging in.

“Hmm, you always thought you were too skinny, now you know how I feel after pizza night! I always thought…you….are just perfect…but you might be a different kind of perfect like this…” She gently rubs the indention lines, using them to guide her fingers. She continues to explore your expanding hips and beyond, slightly pressing on your tummy to see if it feels different. It is a little firmer, gives more resistance when she presses. You both notice and exchange smiles. Sarah leans over, gives your belly button a kiss and helps to remove the rest of the pants. She leans over in a way that purposefully shows her cleavage. Her breasts slightly overfilled the top of her bra, she is obviously going though the same changes as you are. You feel warm, you cannot wait to get her to the bed. You start to unbutton her dress when you both are caught off guard by your jeans. This was the only pair of jeans you owned that you didn’t need a belt to keep them up, even with that the extra fabric in the legs previously swished when walking. Sarah is having to tug rather hard on your jeans to remove them. Your breasts and midsection were not the only thing that has grown, but your legs have additional weight on them too.

“I need you to get on the bed so I can help get these off of you, you have grown so much already!” You lay down, noticing your breasts flattening out and to the side a bit as they do when they are of a larger cup size. With Sarahs help you shimmy the jeggings off. You lean back on the bed with relief when they finally let loose of your legs. The uncomfortable pressure of the waist band digging into your sides must have prevented you from noticing how tight the legs were. You see on your pale legs more red indention marks from where the pant seems were pressing against your growing thighs, but as you rub the indention marks you also feel other lines…you see them almost purple and along your hips and inside of your thighs, the most growth so far. Stretch marks. You are 31 but you finally got them! Sarah proceeds to quickly unbutton her dress and tosses it and your pants next to the luggage the staff left by the door. She jumps on bed with you, you and your new bodies all bounce with the bed springs up and down. You both hug and kiss each other, rolling on the bed, skin touching skin. You don’t notice as much changes on Sarah other than her slightly larger breasts, but you know that will come. You caress her breast with one hand, the other placing the other nipple to your lips, kissing them softly. She sharply gasps and moans, the sudden sensitivity freezing her in pure pleasure. The new changes to each of your bodies has opened a new world for sexual exploration. At this point you both planned on circumnavigating the expanding globes that are your tummys and elsewhere, leaving no area of skin untouched.

The night is simply magical, even better than your honeymoon 7 years ago, if that was possible. The hours pass and you both eventually fall asleep, her spooning you, a hand absently on your new breast, sending shivers over your bidy when her fingertips brush against your enlarged nipple. You realize this is the first time it can actually be cupped a little bit by hand, something Sarah especially made her aware of tonight. You curl up, your favorite sleeping position, and you feel a definite bulge from your swelling tummy when you bring your thighs up close to your body, it being called the fetal position just being ironic in this case. You bring your hand to feel it, and now you have a definate pregnant belly, firm and warm as you rub it slowly. You see is the watch on your wrist, reading hour 10 of the pregnancy.

Your dreams are of your new family: 4 toddler aged children running around playing tag. In your dream you look over to Sarah on your porch swing, heavily pregnant, swollen breasts resting on top of her belly that has spread her legs so wide apart. She has a shirt on, but it barely covers her enlarged popped out belly button that stretches the shirt to its limit. She white skirt she is wearing is nearly hidden by her belly that extends to the middle of her dark thighs.  You are holding the small of your back, taking your time to lean back into the swing, as to not fall over due to your own even larger belly that when you finally seat almost extends to your knees, breasts bounce and then settle to the sides of your firm, almost oblong shaped stomach under a loose sundress. The dream ends with the two of you hopelessly squeezed together, each of your thighs pressing and taking up the empty space under arm rest of the swing. The two person swing didn’t take into account women carrying each a set of twins, making it 6 people. Sarah, you and your four children laughs as they struggle to help you both out of the swing. While dreaming you hold the small swell of your growing child with your hand.

As the sleeping hours pass, it taking up more and more of your hand. You wake up once in the middle of the night due to something pushing against the small of your back, tickling as it creeps up your spine. As you turn over to get more comfortable, sleep still in your eyes, the moonlight reflects off of Sarahs now noticable baby bump, her soft belly you love now taught, the softness that was once there now have been used for your child. You start to find a new comfortable position, but not before you notice Sarahs hand move to her tummy, rubbing it now in her sleep too. You end up sleeping on your back, enjoying the weight you feel between your hips as your belly takes on more of a dome shape against the moon light. You cup one hand under your enlarged bump, the other on Sarahs firm and very warm belly.

I hate that the main reason for hating feminism is that feminists are ‘pushing for a matriarchy’. Aside from the fact that I’ve never met anyone who thought a matriarchy is a good idea, I find this argument completely invalid.

It shows that lots of people recognise that we currently live in a patriarchal society but the idea of living in a matriarchy of the same intensity terrifies them greatly. Effectively, they’re saying that they understand how women are treated in our current society and the thought of being treated in a similar way scares them. And they’re so damn worried by the idea that they actively push away any feminist ideas because they don’t care that women have to endure that shit just as long as they can keep their privilege and stay on the top of the hierarchy in their heteronormative, elitist patriarchy.

It’s frankly disgusting.

Prequel: Azriel-Centric Stories Set Before ACOTAR (ch.3)

This is a collection of interconnected short stories about Azriel’s life before any of the events of ACOTAR through ACOWAR.

Make sure to read Chapter 1Chapter 2Chapter 4Chapter 4.5Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10

Read the follow up fic, Shadows and Darkness: One and the Same

CHAPTER 3: DOREA 

Time frame: 40 years after the War. 

Summary: The Prince of Adriata has been found dead in his sleep lying next to his wife, the newly crowned Princess of Adriata, Dorea. Knowing that the Night Court has a skilled spymaster, High Lord Narayan calls in a favor from Rhys. Azriel and Cassian offer to help investigate the death. Cassian may or may not accidentally destroy a building. 

(Note: This is the longest chapter yet and holds several clues to an overarching fic I’m working on. Remember that though these stories are spaced out and not posted chronologically, they are all interconnected. Enjoy!)

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Okay, I give. You win. UNCLE. I just spent the last hour deleting, unfollowing, and purging what little footprint I had left on social media. I’m still here. I’m just not willing to participate any longer in the Outlander Obsessable Universe. I, like so many others, have been accused of despicable things online. Yes, I am a shipper. But, I have never left hate on anyone ’s IG account. And I, like thousands of other shippers, are being maligned for simply admiring the chemistry between two actors and hoping it carries over into their private lives. But, I am no longer OBSESSED. I’m disgusted. 

I don’t give a rat’s ass who’s dating whom. But that doesn’t mean I can’t observe and comment on my observations. I have come to know so many beautiful, funny, talented women in the shipper community. And, now those women are being derided as old, fat biddies who don’t have meaningful lives. Those women are wives, mother’s, students, doctors, nurses, accountants, lawyers. And they are being marginalized because of what they think. So, many of them are just walking away, with a bitter taste in their mouths, from something that had given them joy. 

Sam, I feel especially saddened by the effect this is having on the MPC Program in which you have invested so much time and effort. At ECCC you seemed genuinely moved at the stories of how that program has helped so many to feel good about themselves for the first time in their lives. And now you have this journalist, Bernadette Giacomazza, spewing hate toward some of these same women because they happen to call themselves shippers. She and her aide de camp, Vince DeMello, mock the before and after pictures of MPC participants as a way of “putting them in their place”. I’m sure this is not what you had in mind as the legacy of your labor of love. 

None of the women I know, who call themselves shippers, condones the terrible comments posted on Mackenzie Mauzy’s IG account. Many of those being blamed by Mr. Shatner have been in the forefront of begging people to stay away from those posts. Some of us have asked why Ms. Mauzy doesn’t simply disable comments as a way of eliminating a war zone. But, to merely suggest such a solution, is seen as an approval of the trolls. If all the shippers somehow magically disappeared (and we’re close to that outcome), the trolls would still be there stirring the pot. 

Every time, things quiet down in the fandom, and people are just enjoying being an Outlander fan, William Shatner starts dredging up old grievances, calling the fans cockroaches and deranged grandmothers. He seems to get a perverse amount of pleasure in belittling anyone who speaks up for shipping in any fandom. It seems a strange way to build a fan base. So, the outcome is that finally self-preservation takes over any fan loyalty. Fans can take only so much abuse. Starz has let this bloodbath go on too long. It breaks my heart.

Something that relates to @marsinlibra ‘s amazing words about “Women all have different experiences”. 

One of the founding actions that feminists did that solidified their movement was “conscious raising”. It was basically women sharing their anecdotal experiences and realizing that the oppression women face is collective and it is not an individual experience. The whole point was to say “actually we DO all have the same/similar experiences.” That this one woman’s rape happened and it IS related to my rape, and it IS related to the domestic violence our friend experienced and it IS related to the women who are forced into porn and all our collective oppression regardless of race, class and sexuality is inter-related and effects us all. “I am not free while any woman is unfree, even when her shackles are very different from my own” - Audre Lorde. The collective Female experience CANNOT be written off.

I was a part of a Conscious raising action recently and it highlighted this so well. We all sat in a circle and there were 7 questions that were going to be asked to the group. If your answer to the question was “yes” then you would stand up, breath, and look at the other women who were also standing up. In our group there were all kinds of women, from all over the world and from all ages. No woman stood up alone to ANY question. Questions like “were you ever scared that you were pregnant when you didn’t want to be?” Almost every woman stood up. Or “Have you ever been sexually assaulted by a stranger, a family member or someone you know?” Almost every woman stood up. The female experience is real. Girlhood is real. And our collective shared oppression is real. Telling women that we cannot define female oppression or that all our experiences are so different that they do not relate is an attack on feminism. It separates us again. It makes it so that our neighbours abuse has nothing to do with our own or that the rape of a girl has nothing to do with anything and that it just *happened* and that’s the end of any conversation. All we are left with are isolated incidents that get shut away devoid of political analysis and understanding. We NEED political analysis and social consciousness to liberate women and to break down patriarchy, capitalism and white supremacy.

crazymisstoast  asked:

Hello! I was stalking your blog a little and I quite like your opinions and the way you express them. Now, I have a kinda difficult thing which I'd like to discuss: What would you think about an kinda AU of the real life: A novel set in the Victorian era where everything is the same except homosexuality is accepted? Like, with all the manners and stiffness and all but - gay. And for example that two men marrying is more okay than 2 women bc of financial reasons. Simply stupid or worth a try?

Hi! Thanks so much for the blog-love. :)

As to the historical AU, of course I have no objections to the theory of it. My chief concern would be how far you would wish to alter social history to justify that one change. Everything is so intertwined and a product of its own past and context that to change one thing is to change many things, particularly with regards to perceptions and presentations of gender and sexuality. If cis gay sexuality is acceptable, then the presentation of traditional masculinity must hold much less sway over social norms. To my understanding, Victorian strict sexual mores grew out of their particular culture and time, encompassing the advancing technologies of the industrial revolution and scientific progress in ways that contributed to people really eagerly getting the wrong end of the stick and running with it. (Example: we can blame microscopes for the Victorian disbelief in the vaginal or clitoral orgasm. A little bit of new science gone very, very wrong.)

If these Victorians have neither cultural nor religious objections to same-sex marriage, the heteronormative family structure and the gender roles within it have little to uphold them as they did in the real-life strictness of Victorian society. Where does misogyny fit into this structure, as patriarchy is still implied to exist? If two women are permitted to marry in this society, then the notion that they have no need of a man would surely push for greater liberties for them as individuals worthy and capable of supporting themselves, with equal rights in wages and votes. Could the social and economic oppression of women continue in a world where they are already not being told that they must require a man to support and speak for them? I feel like the gender binary should rapidly dissolve, in this context.

To suit my mind, a Victorian AU couldn’t really have one thing changed, and all else remain exactly the same, without there being a ripple-effect throughout society, culminating in a variation of a culture which functions rather unlike the history we recognize. So a more liberal ‘Victorian’ society would perhaps turn out more steampunk pseudo-Victorian in aesthetic, with radically different social structures and traditions, in practice.

anonymous asked:

came for the fantasy biology, stayed for everything else. Happy International Women's Day! Do you think the feminisation of veterinarian field is contributing to lower wages? In Eastern Europe, where the entire medical profession is seen as "women's work", medical doctors are paid very low wages, similar to teachers. It seems that the more women enter a field, the more it becomes undervalued and lower wages results. In the west, where medicine is male dominated, there are good wages.

Yes I do think the increasing percentage of women in veterinary medicine has contributed to the profession’s relatively low wage/ I was going to write this as a part 2 for the original post, but since you asked I’ll put in here.

Consider this Feminization of the Veterinary Industry, part 2.

As a society, we unfortunately have a tendency to perceive ‘women’s work’ as being less important. This is bollocks, but it’s a perception that exists. It’s pervasive and insidious. As society views women’s work as less valuable, it inevitably ends up viewing work done mostly by women as, by definition, ‘women’s work’. As a result work done by female vets seems to be valued less, and eventually so does the work of our entire profession.

I still see this directly sometimes. A price or estimate for a procedure given by myself is more likely to be disputed, sometimes quite aggressively, but the same arguments is not raised against estimates given by male coworkers.

There’s been a pretty good study called ‘Effect of gender on ownership and income in veterinary practice’. If you have access to the Australian Veterinary Journal you cal look up the paper directly. The data could be summaries as follows:

  • All age groups of vets are averaging more than full time hours
  • Men achieve practice ownership sooner, independent of geographical location
  • While new graduates are starting on similar wages despite gender ( median 39k for men and 36k for women)
  • While 10-20 years after graduation men are working more hours than women on average, this is still above full time hours for both groups.
  • 20 years after graduation, when men and women are averaging 50 and 49 hours per week respectively, the average incomes are 81k and 51k respectively.

That’s female vets with the same years of experience earning 62 cents in the dollar compared to their male counterparts, for those playing at home. You might wonder whether that’s because male vets are working more hours, or because more of them are practice owners. The study wondered this too. Here are their results.

According to these results, even when female vets are working more than full time, they are still earning less than their male counterparts. Female vets that own practices are earning similar incomes to male vets who are only employed. This is disappointing when the pay scales were so equal at the early stages of the career.

There was also a study I’ve read, but cannot for the life of me find (but will offer cookies for anyone that does locate it) that collected historical wage data for veterinarians, dentists and general practitioners from around 1970 onward to compare this data to the percent of women in that field.

 At great surprise to nobody, wages were pretty similar for the three professions when all three were male dominated. But the data showed that while dentist and GP wages increased roughly with inflation, veterinarian wages increased at a lower rate, resulting in the average vet wage in the modern day being approximately half that of the other two professions.

The wage gap for new graduate veterinarians is pretty little. This is probably explained by the phenomenon of ‘poaching’ male new grad vets.

In short, male new grads are a rarity. They’re outnumbered by female graduates by 4 or 5 to one. Vet clinics that really want a male new grad, often because male practice owners see something of themselves in the new grad. Male new grads seem more likely to have job offers before graduation, often from clinics they’ve done work experience at. This is what we called ‘poaching’, because these male new grads didn’t even have to hit the job market for their first job.

The wage gap for practice owners is more concerning, and I don’t have a likely reason for why this would be so, or why it would be so marked. The most likely scenario I can think of is chronic undervaluing of services and their own work.

The chronic lower income of female veterinarians, which means the majority of the vet workforce has a lower income, may have contributed to the rise of the corporate vet practice chain.

Traditionally, a practice owner who wanted to retire would sell their practice, their life’s work, to their younger associate. If your younger associate has earned less than she perhaps would have for the previous 10-20 years, suddenly the younger associate isn’t in a position to buy the business. The practice owner needs to sell their business to retire, but their protege can’t afford it. Consequently, more and more of these practices are being bought up by different corporate chains when the owner wants to retire, but doesn’t have a buyer of their own.

I don’t know anyone who sold to a corporate as their first choice. Mostly this happens because there wasn’t another buyer who could match that price. The industry in general was very resistant and hesitant about these corporate practices, but they have now secured themselves in the industry and are here to stay. Once a corporate owns a practice, they rarely if ever sell. They are more likely to close the practice and transfer the client base than to sell it.

The old style of vet clinic, the small or family business where the owner is working alongside everyone else, is slowly vanishing. It makes me profoundly uncomfortable, because I don’t believe corporate medicine is the way it should be.

In the interest of full disclosure, I am female, and work more than full time hours across two jobs. One is in a locally owned small business, and the other is in a corporate emergency center. There is so much paperwork, customer service training and difficulty getting paid at the corporate clinic, it really is a huge amount of wank. But the corporate chains are the only enterprising willing to run them.

I can get away with not doing a lot of the stupid things the corporate wants me to do because of my years of experience and knowing just how fundamentally useful I am to them, I can call their bluff. A new graduate in my position wouldn’t be able to, and that worries me.

So what can the vet industry do?

I’d like to point out that at the tie of the study referenced above, the average wage in Australia would have been around $42k per year, according to taxation records. So the wages for many of us were proving to be very, very average.

If we’re going to stem the corporate takeover of the veterinary industry, then we need to be able to pay our employed vets better. They are working in their job to eventually buy their job, if you continually underpay them they wont ever be able to buy their way up, and for women this barely seems worth doing.

The veterinary industry needs the general public to be more willing to invest in animal health and care. This likely needs greater uptake of pet insurance policies, and that industry needs to get itself organized too.

Legacy planning should be considered earlier for vets who intend to sell their practice when they retire, i.e. most of them. This should be mentioned early as a potential future, or smaller percentage buy-ins over time rather then one lump sum.

This is just one of the issues the veterinary industry is currently facing, but the chronic undervaluing of women’s labor can’t be dismissed as a factor.

This topic had been requested by my supporters on Patreon. You can gain access to early content and vote on major topics for this blog by pledging as little as $1 a month

Around the Fire

A super-late entry for Day 08 of Phanniemay, “Vacation.” 

“Halle Berry or J.Lo?”

Two voices, in unison. “Halle Berry.”

“Kristen Stewart or Emma Watson?”

“Emma Watson.”

“Scarlet Johansson or Gina Torres?”

“Gina Torres.”

“Morena Baccarin or Natalie Portman?”

Sam rolled her eyes. “Geez, Tuck, running through the entire Firely cast?”

“Inara.” Danny and Danielle said. 

Tuck held up his hands in a ‘there you see?’ gesture. 

“I’ve got one.” All eyes went to Valerie, still tending their makeshift grill over the campfire. Looking up with a dangerous, knowing half-smile, she worded out slowly, “Paulina or Star?”

“Paulina,” Danielle replied without hesitation.

Stiff-shouldered and tensely still, Danny glanced warily at Sam. 

“It’s fine, Danny,” she assured him, lips quirked. 

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2000 Followers Celebration -Drabbles

You guys help me choose therefore I am going to do drabbles to celebrate based on the prompt list bellow. Before request, please read:

1) Please request the drabbles until next Wednesday  (05/07) or (07/05 if you are an Amerincan.)

2) Send the requests on my ask.

3) Please come off anon, I promise I don’t bite. 

4) I will write for Bucky, Steve, Tony, Loki and Peter ( but no smut for him).

5) I don’t know if i am going to be able to do all the drabbles but i will try my best.

6) Have fun.

7) These prompts i found i over the interent;

8) You must be following me.


Prompts 

1) “Close your eyes.” + “I swear if you do something nasty I’m out of here.”

2)  Are you flirting with me?” + “Well, it’s about time you noticed.”

3) “I should be the only one making you happy.”

4)“I don’t want to go, your dad doesn’t like me.”

5) “Having something you can’t bear to lose is fucking scary.”

6) “Quit smiling at me, I can’t stop messing up my sentences when you look at me like that.”

7) “You look so comfy and cuddle-able.”

8)“I can’t get over how a few months ago I wanted to learn your name and now you’re having breakfast with me in my sweater.”

9) “No, like…. It’s just, I can’t believe you’re actually wearing my clothes.”

10) “I would’ve had breakfast ready, but you were sleeping on my arm, and I didn’t want to wake you.”

11) “Did you use my cologne? You smell like me.”

12) “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

13)  “You can hurt yourself with that- *uses weapon skillfully*
You were saying?”

14) “ ‘Ya know, to be a smartass you have to be smart first, otherwise, you’re just an ass.”

15)  ‘How long have you been standing there?’ ‘Longer than you’d like.’

16)  ‘IS THAT PAINT?! Wait, nope, just my blood.’

17)  ‘That looks infected.’ ‘It’s fine.’ ‘You’re dying.’ ‘Well… that’s fine too.’

18)  ‘Let’s talk dirty to each other.’ ‘Babe… we’re at work. Remember? Professional. Behavior. Please.’

19)  ‘I can save you.’ ‘No, you can’t.’

20)  ‘sometimes i wonder if you even care about me.”

21)  I think you’re just afraid to be happy.”

22)  “You make me nervous and happy and horny all at the same time and it’s confusing as fuck sometimes.”

23)  Why are you always so cold?”

24)  “Already? Do I really have that much of an effect on you?”

25)  “It’s like you want to ruin men/women for me.”

26)  “We haven’t had sex in like a month, you’re just going to tease me like that?”

27)  “Do you think at all before you speak?”

28)  “I don’t want to be just friends with benefits anymore.”

29) “ You see, unlike some other people, I don’t sleep with everyone I make eye contact with.”

30) “Why do you always have to hurt me ?”

31) “  You always blame me for everything.”

32) “I didn’t realize I needed your permission.”

33)  “If I ever see you anywhere near her/him, you’ll have to deal with me!”

34)  Please don’t give up on me.”

35)  “Promise me you’ll take better care of yourself.”

36)  “I’ve made so many mistakes… but you’re not one of them.”

37) “You’re so cute when you’re tired, you know.”

38)  “It’s lonely without you in the bed.”

39)   “I’m not jealous, but, like, come on, movie night is just for me and you only.”

40) “ I do love you”

41)  “When did you get so beautiful?”

42)  “No, I don’t know how I got a boner, It just kind of happened! It’s because of how you were eating that ice cream, I bet!”

43)  “The date didn’t go well.  Yeah, she/he didn’t like how I kept mentioning all of our adventures.”

44)  “ You didn’t do the dishes, I’m not doing you.” 

45)  “Hot, gorgeous, beautiful…whatever you want to call it.”

anonymous asked:

ew you're a vegan. all of you are hateful and think you guys are so damn good. you're so stupid for thinking eating meat is bad. meat is the best. you guys push your opinions on people and try to make us feel bad. unfollowed.

PSA / RANT

The hostility between vegans and non-vegans has always been rather puzzling to me. I’ve been a vegan for a good number of years now, and all I’ve really seen in regards to ‘hate’ would be some non-vegans saying that vegans are cruel to them, judge them, or ridicule them.

While I’m positive there have been vegans who are cruel and judgemental, I think it is incredibly unfair to make all vegans the enemy because of those select few.

As a society, aren’t we pushing the idea that radical extremists only make up for a very small, very incorrect percentage of a whole group?

Any vegans you may come in contact with who push their beliefs down your throat should be treated in the same way you would treat a radical feminist.

I do not categorize all meat-eaters as reluctant, and often cold and close-minded, even though I have met many who fit that description.

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I’m not gonna get into this a lot because it’s personal and connected to some bad things for me but it is so astounding and powerful how easily white women are able to get people to believe that they are victims and are innocent no matter what they have done. I’ve seen black women and other women of color unable to get people to believe they were sexually assaulted by white women, I’ve seen white women complain openly about being emotionally abusive to their partners because their actions just aren’t scrutinized except to see what their partners are doing TO them, and it has real and devastating effects on those of us for whom that presumption isn’t there. Obviously this post is mostly about interaction between women but white women pull the same thing when it comes to black men and other men of color as well, every day, and have for years! White women and their purity were major motivators for lynchings and they’re still using the same presumption of innocence to hurt real live people.

harumisaylasayaka  asked:

How do I explain to my male friend that men and women still aren't equal?? (Are we equal???)

No, were not equal.

I think a major road block with men is that patriarchy/sexism at worst doesn’t affect them, and at best benefits them. It’s something they have internalized and aren’t really aware of. It’s important for them to remember that if your wondering if women are oppressed, he simply can’t look to his own experience. He has to listen to the group in question. And if you talk to a lot of women, they feel the are oppressed. And we notice it, because it impacts our lives directly. Just point to the fact that so many women can relate. I mean, just take the Womens March as an example.  How is it possible that millions of unrelated women have noticed the same problem, and are negatively effected by it enough to protest with strangers all over the world? That is a very telling sign that its not just personal perception, but a systematic problem that transcends cultures, geography, country, race, ethnicity, etc.

He likely won’t just take your word for it though. Lucky for you, there is plenty of proof out there. Show him statistics on rape/sexual assault, sexual harassment, catcalling, female genital mutilation, female infanticide, lack of reproductive access/healthcare, child brides, prostitution, sex trafficking, objectification in media, unrealistic beauty standards, eating disorders, wage gaps, domestic violence. 

Next, he will probably say that these kinds of problems ‘don’t exist in the first world’ or ‘aren’t as much of a problem anymore’. Tell him that, yes, things have gotten a lot better and there has been progress, but that doesn’t mean the problem is over. (also people act like we got our right to vote and enter the workforce EONS ago when it was only a few decades). Tell him that just because something is illegal or taboo, doesn’t mean it has stopped happening or is not a problem. Tell him how, even now, in our supposedly more ‘advanced and progressive society’ that: 

-1 in 4 women will be raped, most don’t report it and when they do the rapists get off easy( community service, 3 month jail sentence, and my personal favorite: “suspended upon graduation”). Tell him that a few years ago, hundreds of universities were put on federal investigation for violation of title IX (mishandling or suppression of rape allegations).

- human trafficking is alive and well in the West, in industrialized countries, all over the world. Tens of thousands of human trafficking cases are reported each year in the United States. 4 out of five victims are girls, most likely underage. 

-Tell him that media, TV, magazines, etc. reinforces unrealistic beauty ideals for women. The average model (the ‘ideal’ beauty) is 5′9-5′11 and 100-120 lbs (most have dangerous BMI’s and meet criteria for anorexia) while the average American woman is 5′4 140 lbs. Tell him that 42% of 1st-3rd grade girls want to be thinner, 81% of 10 year olds are afraid of being fat ,35-57% of adolescent girls engage in crash dieting, fasting, self-induced vomiting, diet pills, or laxatives. Eating disorders are on the rise, estimated at about 30 million, but received much less funding (and eating disorders have highest mortality rate of any psychiatric disease).

Illness                                            Prevalence                    NIH Research Funds (2011)
Alzheimer’s Disease                        5.1 million                     $450,000,000
Autism                                            3.6 million                     $160,000,000
Schizophrenia                                3.4 million                     $276,000,000
Eating disorders                             30 million                      $28,000,000


-physically attractive and thinner women make more money and are considered more intelligent.

-1 in 3 (about 30%) of women who have been in relationships will experience some form of sexual or physical violence from a partner. Estimates of non-fatal domestic violence against women range from 1 million to 4 million a year. The most recent report by the US Department of Justice, which found women suffer 805,700 physical injuries at the hands of partners each year, compared to 173,960 men.

-1 in 3 women ages 18-34 have been sexually harassed at work. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) is responsible for enforcing anti-discrimination laws in the US. Almost Three in Ten Cases Before the EEOC Are Sex Discrimination Cases 31

-In the United States in 2010, 1,095 women were killed by husbands or boyfriends, accounting for 37.5% of female murders.

-Women are less likely to be hired or promoted( there have been dozens of studies in multiple fields of different levels that hand out identical resumes that only differ in gender/name). There is sill a wage gap in the united states in most professions. This wage gap is worse for women of color.Women working 41 to 44 hours per week earn 84.6% of what men working similar hours earn; women working more than 60 hours per week earn only 78.3% of what men in the same time category earn (Bureau of Labor Statistics, cited in Hilary M. Lips, “The Gender Wage Gap: Debunking the Rationalizations”). Contrary to this claim, one Harvard University researcher found that men have an average net worth of $26,850, compared to an average of $12,900 for women.

-Women hold just 4 percent of CEO positions at S&P 500 companies. Women make up just 19 percent of the U.S. House of Representatives.. They comprise 20 percent of Senate seats.

-There’s a particularly well-documented gender gap in the treatment of pain. Even though women are more likely to suffer from chronic pain — fibromyalgia, for instance, almost exclusively affects women — they’re less likely than their male counterparts to receive appropriate treatment for it. Multiple studieshave found that medical interventions to manage pain, ranging from knee surgeries to opioid prescriptions, are less likely to be recommended for female patients. This approach toward female patients fits into a long history of attributing women’s behavior to mental health disorders

-Most drugs are clinically tested on male bodies. Androcentric thinking in science sees the male body as default, and the womans reproductive cycle as an ‘extraneous, complicating’ variable. This leaves women bodies to be guinnie pigs in the market. And some drugs, especially psychiatric drugs, have been proven to work differently in women bodies 

-Girls are more vulnerable to incest and child sexual abuse, especially by fathers and step fathers. 

-Womens bodies are constantly trying to be controlled. And most of the people enacting policies and laws are old, white men. They usually have straight up false information about women anatomy and the mechanisms of birth control, abortion, etc. (Lawmaker who called pregnant women a ‘host’ pushes bill requiring fathers to approve abortion, Republican Congressman Todd Akin said Victims Of ‘Legitimate Rape’ Do Not Get Pregnant, Lobbyists claim that IUDs and morning-after pills are more like abortifacients, meaning they kill fertilized embryos)

Things lawmakers have actually said: “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down.”, “Who needs abortion when victims of sexual assault can just get “cleaned out” by a rape kit?”, “abortion is much more serious than rape of children by priests.” x.)

Coverage for birth control is actively opposed

-More than half of states in the US — 26 total — provide “severely restricted access,”. 20 states have bans outlawing specific abortion procedures as early as 12 weeks with no exception to protect a woman’s health. 18 states have state-mandated counseling, which requires telling women who are getting abortions: the ability of a fetus to feel pain, the link between mental health and abortion, require women to get ultrasounds before aborting, etc. 46 states allow individual health care providers to refuse abortion access. 

-Lack of paid maternal leave or support for mothers in the work place. 

-In grade school, teachers are more likely to call on boys in the class room and praise them, give boys more extensive feedback, and use longer wait-time with boys than girls. Research shows that boys are referred for testing for gifted programs twice as often as girls (Orenstein, 1994). Boys are encouraged more than girls to pressure STEM fields. This inequality continues in higher education. Findings suggest that gender and attractiveness may influence the type of authority image that a teacher projects.  This randomized, double-blind study  found that both male and female faculty exhibited a bias against female undergraduate students, evaluating them as less competent, hirable, and qualified, and offering them less funding and mentorship.

-Tell him your specific experiences as a woman. Maybe you’ve been catcalled, mansplained, talked over and interrupted (which studies prove men do more), felt objectified or pressured to conform to beauty ideals.


This list is by no means exhaustive. Tell your male friends that if he thinks sexism is over or a thing of the past, he is willfully ignorant. 

Okay, Wuko people, I just read the new Korra comic (The Legend of Korra: Turf Wars, Part One) and I realized there is a bit of Avatar LGBT history in it that could be quite relevant to Prince Wu.

The below is not really a plot spoiler for the comic, but I guess it is a minor spoiler.

When Kya is giving her amazing gay pep talk, she’s talking about the Earth and Fire Nations and says

 “For most of its history, the Fire Nation was tolerant too, but then Fire Lord Sozin took power. He decreed that same-sex relationships were criminal…Even Avatar Kyoshi–who by all accounts loved men and women–was unable to effect any kind of real progress. After all, the Earth Kingdom has been the slowest to accept change, and the most militaristically repressive.”

This would lend credence to a fan theory I have seen a lot that Wu is gay and flirts with women in such outrageous and over-the-top ways as a coverup of this fact. The show portrays Wu as quite stereotypically flamboyant and feminine (not saying that makes him gay, but saying that they code him in a way more common to queer characters). It also shows him always all over Mako in a very suggestive way; however, it also shows him hitting on women in ridiculous, exaggerated ways that never work.

If the Earth Nation is regressive about same-sex relationships, Wu, as its monarch, would feel pressured to seem straight and maybe even to marry a woman and have kids in the future. His annoying way with women makes a lot more sense when you consider him as someone who is doing all he can to seem as publicly and visibly straight as possible, while actually sabotaging himself, either intentionally or subconsciously.