i have the worst humor

4

Aaron had a rough time of it this year, sorting out a birthday present for his husband…

      ↬ April 22, 1986 - Happy Birthday, Robert!

anonymous asked:

Hi friend! May I ask for a small Jeffmads comic where Alexander insults Thomas then James suddenly gets angry and starts shouting at Alex? Thank you! xx

This was the best possible cooldown. Thank you so much for sending this in.

(Lyrics from the omitted Cabinet Battle 3)

Edit: it just now hit me that you probably wanted something more sweet and sincere but I have the worst sense of humor and you got this instead. I’m sorry

Friend: “How’s the editing process going for your boo–”

Me:

Cristiano Ronaldo Imagine || Not Leaving (Cristiano Jr.)

Originally posted by aliirb

I throw the last pair of shoes into my suitcase and zip it up, wondering if I remembered to pack everything for my work trip, as I’m dragging the suitcase behind me, towards the stairway. I can hear Cristiano and Junior watching cartoons in the living room and I don’t want to ruin their fun, so I pick the suitcase up and make my way down the stairs, silently praying not to fall on my face. Or any other part of my body. Just not to fall in general. Not falling is great. Judging by its weight, I most likely got everything I could possibly need and more. A lot more.

“Y/N?” Cristiano calls out once I’m about halfway down. “Oh my God! Are you purposely trying to break a bone tonight? Give me that.” He takes the bag away from me and carries it down, shooting daggers at me with his eyes.

“You’re ridiculous. I could’ve done that on my own.”

“Sure. I’m just not sure if you would’ve gotten down in one piece. You’re the most uncoordinated person in the world, so how about you leave the heavy lifting to me?” He laughs and throws an arm around me, ruining my attempt to be mad at him. “What do you need that much stuff for, anyway? I thought it was just for a couple of days.”

“I lied. I’m actually leaving you.” I manage to keep a straight face, hoping I’ll scare him even a little bit. Even for just a few seconds. But of course he just raises an eyebrow at me, completely unaffected. “You could at least pretend you’d care.”

“You mean I could at least pretend you were being vaguely convincing, which you weren’t.” He laughs. “And let’s be real here. Who would leave me?” The fact that he is so obviously joking doesn’t make his cockiness sound any less annoying.

“I don’t know, but if you keep saying stuff like that, you might find out pretty soon.”

I playfully shove him towards the living room and we both sit down on the couch, on either side of Junior, who is watching an episode of Tom & Jerry that we’ve seen with him countless times before, but that doesn’t stop him from being completely focused on the screen. I turn to my boyfriend to make a joke about it, but Cristiano’s eyes are glued to the TV and I can’t help but laugh to myself.

“You’re evil.” He turns to me. “How can you laugh at poor Jerry?” I look towards the screen for the first time and notice the tiny animated mouse being caught in some kind of elaborate trap, which seems to profoundly affect Cristiano, so I laugh again.

“I’m starting to think it wasn’t Junior’s idea to watch this.”

“No, I’ve already seen this one. I don’t even like it. Daddy wanted to watch!” The boy corrects me, still focused on the cartoon.

“What do you mean you don’t like it?” I chuckle. “You watch this all the time.”

Junior ignores me, which isn’t something he does very often, but his father brushes the whole thing off with a shrug, so I let it slide, thinking he’s probably just too caught up in his show. We sit there for another hour or so, watching a bunch of other episodes and I can’t help but notice that Cristiano and I are the only ones bursting into laughter or even just giggling at some of the scenes. Junior just sits there in complete silence, looking less than happy.

“Hey.” I put my hand on the boy’s shoulder, finally earning a reaction from him, as he turns around to face me. “Is something wrong?” He shakes his head and turns back around.

“Cristianinho.” His father says, getting his attention for a brief second. Another episode has ended, which leaves Junior with nothing to focus on and ignore us, so his eyes immediately dart to the floor.

“Are you alright? What’s going on?” I ask, but it’s as if I’m talking to myself. “You know you can talk to me, right?” I know he does, but I still feel like he needs reassurance in order to tell me about whatever is bugging him.

“I don’t want to talk to you.” He states. Cristiano and I stare at each other in confusion, because that’s something neither of us expected to hear from him.

“Do you want to talk to me?” The boy nods, so they both stand up and walk out of the room, leaving me alone and completely confused.

Part of me is aware that whatever Junior’s problem might be, it can’t be too big of a deal, seeing as to how he’s a five year old child, but then again, he’s never not wanted to talk to me about something. He was only three when Cristiano and I started dating, so being around me is something he’s always been used to. I know that getting a three year old to like you isn’t exactly difficult, but I always took pride in the fact that Junior felt comfortable enough to talk to me about any and everything for as long as I can remember. Whenever he was upset with his dad for whatever reason or his friends said something mean or when he just wanted to tell someone all about a new toy he got, I was his go-to person. And while I realize that Cristiano is his father and there’s nothing strange about them talking alone, I still don’t like it. Maybe that’s how he feels every day.

When they finally come back after what seems like an eternity, Junior looks like he’s been crying, while Cristiano has an amused smile plastered on his face, which only further confuses me.

“What’s going on?” I ask my boyfriend in a hushed tone. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing.” He chuckles. “You have the worst sense of humor.”

“What? What did I say? What are you talking about?”

“Just talk to him, Y/N.”

I roll my eyes at him and take a few steps towards Junior, whose eyes are still glued to the floor and I can tell he is a little startled when I crouch down next to him.

“Do you want to tell me what’s wrong now?” I ask.

“I don’t want you to leave.”

“Is that why you’re sad?” He nods and it warms my heart. “You know, I don’t really want to go either, but it’s my job. I’m only going to be gone for a few days. You won’t even notice I’m not here.”

“You’re lying!” Junior yells. “You’re not coming back. I heard you tell daddy.”

At first, I have no idea what he is talking about, so I turn to Cristiano, but the I-told-you-so look on his face reminds me of what he just said about my terrible sense of humor. And then it hits me. Junior must’ve heard us earlier, when we were talking about my luggage. When I said I was leaving him.

“Oh my God.” I gasp, holding back a fit of laughter, because I don’t want the boy to think I’m making fun of him, although the whole situation is nothing short of hilarious.”You heard us talking earlier, didn’t you?”

“You said you were leaving us.” The sad look on his face makes me feel incredibly bad and all of the sudden I don’t feel like laughing anymore.

“I’m not leaving you. Come here and listen to me.” I sit on the couch next to Cristiano, who obviously still finds the whole thing extremely amusing, and pat the spot next to me. “I have to go, but it’s only for a few days. I’m not leaving anyone. I’ll be back before you know it.”

“You will?” He finally looks up at me and his lips curl into a smile, his whole face lighting up again.

“I promise I will.” I wrap an arm around him and pull him closer. “You should know by now that I don’t plan on leaving either of you anytime soon. I was just making a joke.”

“A bad joke.” Cristiano adds with a laugh. “A horribly bad joke.”

“Actually, now that I think about it, I might just not come back.” I say and Junior immediately looks up at me. “Joke. Another joke.” Cristiano opens his mouth to say something that I have a feeling isn’t going to be very nice. “Unless you’re about to tell me how incredibly beautiful I am, I suggest you keep your mouth shut.”

“I was about to say I love you.”

“Nice save.”

Do Me a Favor (Part 12)

Summary:  AU! Bucky Barnes and you are neighbors and close friends. As a huge favor, Bucky asks you to pretend to be his girlfriend for a relative’s wedding and you agree.

Word Count: 2,753

Warnings: None.

“Do Me a Favor” Masterlist

A/N: Here you go, guys! This isn’t a re-write anymore. I hope you all enjoy. I may have one or two parts left. I don’t know yet. 


Originally posted by natpekis


It was quite cliché of you to think so, but you could have sworn that you saw fireworks go off behind your eyelids as you began to get lost in the kisses Bucky was pressing against your mouth. His lips moved almost tenderly, leading yours in a slow, sultry dance. You were acutely aware of every one of his movements, your body reacting to his exploring hands by shuddering against him. His fingertips journeyed up your arms, leaving behind goosebumps and a yearning for more.

He took a hand away from where he was now tracing your shoulder blades, taking your wrist and pressing your palm to his pectoral, urging you to get to know him once again. Excitement surged through you, hands quickly beginning to roam the expanse of his torso, marveling at the muscles beneath the thin shirt he was wearing.

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curlyboydaniel  asked:

!!!!! Firstly tHANK YOU for responding ALSO WHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ??! I’m immensely happy that someone would want to talk to me that’s SO cool !! but also I would very much be a disappointment as I am very boring and can’t keep up a conversation and am extremely awkward (hence why i have like, literally no friends) but you seem nice and I would love to talk to you and all that jazz,, I have the worst personality and am not humorous ah :-( xx