i have red lipstick

fourth of july: fahc edition

(bc i’m slightly tipsy and there’s already ppl shooting fireworks outside)
(under a read more bc i have no control  and must be stopped)

jack

  • wears bright red lipstick and blue eyeshadow bc she’s feelin p a t r i o ti c
  • is in charge of the food
  • her apron says “quit bitchin’ in my kitchen”
  • actually the kitchen is strictly off-limits while she’s cooking get the fuck outta here
  • seriously one time she threw a knife at ryan’s head when he tried to grab a potato chip
  • goes all out for the fourth of july y’all. we’re talking buttery corn on the cob, fresh guac, fried green tomatoes, salted watermelon, mac n cheese, apple pie mmmmMMMMM
  • follows an old patillo family recipe to make the best goddamn potato salad this side of the mississippi river holy shit like,,, it’s so fucking good god bless the patillos
  • uses a secret ingredient in her potato salad that she’ll take to her grave don’t even bother asking buddy she’ll laugh in your face
  • (jeremy thinks it’s white wine)
  • (gavin thinks its cocaine)

geoff

  • wears leather sandals and american flag-printed board shorts why geoffrey why
  • is in charge of drinks
  • obviously
  • imports single malt whisky straight from scotland
  • then steals 2 dozen crates of bud light from the 24/7 supermarket down the street
  • geoff there’s literally only 15 people at this party do you really need 10 bottles of tequila
  • likes making mixed drinks for people who didn’t order them
  • his “signature drink” is called The Firecracker™
  • everyone’s pretty sure it’s just fireball and actual gasoline
  • always ends up ranting about how fucked up the american founding fathers were
  • “guys thomas jefferson was such a dick i fucking hate that dude”
  • “we know geoff”

ryan

  • shifts into Ultimate Dad Mode™ on the fourth of july bless his heart
  • unironically wears USA t-shirts from old navy and a backwards baseball cap
  • it makes him look * c o o l *
  • is in charge of the grill
  • looks way too comfortable using a meat cleaver and a butcher knife
  • ryan that’s just *beef* in those burgers right?
  • has an AK-47 strapped to his back just in case they come
  • “just in case who comes?”
  • “they”
  • likes to sing 80’s rock music while grilling 
  • there’s a video of him belting jessie’s girl into his spatula
  • ryan is not aware of this video
  • it’s saved on jack’s laptop (encrypted and password protected)

jeremy

  • is in charge of the music
  • turns into the biggest Dudebro™ on the fourth
  • yells ‘merica before doing anything
  • uses red white n blue spray-on hair color and completely fucks up the bathroom sink with it
  • his playlist is called “'freedom muthafukaaaas”
  • songs include: bruce springsteen’s “born to run”, warrant’s “cherry pie”, ELO’s “mr. blue sky” and abba’s “dancing queen”
  • insists on being called DJ rimmy tim for the whole day
  • keeps trying to get people to play pool volleyball with him
  • drinks anything geoff puts in front of him
  • he and jack end up trying to parachute from the cargobob into the pool
  • “jerEMY NO”

michael

  • is in charge of the fireworks
  • doesn’t buy fireworks tho are you kidding me fuck that this isn’t amateur hour sON
  • spends all of april/may developing homemade fireworks with trevor and matt
  • has almost lost multiple fingers while testing their creations
  • also nearly blinded himself while trying to modify a bottle rocket
  • tbh this is the most dangerous thing he does all year and he’s a Professional Criminal for a living
  • created a firework that explodes in bright red brocades and makes the air smell like roses
  • he calls it “the lindsay”
  • every year there’s an illegal massive fireworks show on mt. haan that gets set up anonymously and is electronically detonated
  • everyone knows its the fakes but literally every person in town comes out to watch it and it’s basically a los santos tradition so the LSPD are like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 
  • they get a tupperware of potato salad for their troubles
  • (it’s the best goddamn potato salad they’ve ever had)

gavin

  • likes to remind everyone that’s he’s british and that he’s offended by their patriotism
  • “congrats on your bad healthcare and shite chocolate”
  • paints a lil british flag on his cheek bc fuck u guys
  • but then #brexit rip
  • has the most insane shit delivered to the penthouse for Funsies™
  • last year it was a massive bouncy castle that blocked off the whole street
  • the year before he brought five thousand water ballons filled with ice, blood, flour, and some weird goo he somehow smuggled in from china
  • jeremy almost had to go to the hospital
  • geoff was not a fan
  • literally no one has a clue what gavin has planned for this year and they’re not sure if they should be terrified or excited
  • (it’s actually a lads vs gents nerf battle with tranquilizer-loaded darts)
  • (geoff will not be a fan)

the fakes

  • just bc it’s a national holiday doesn’t mean they’re not heisting
  • jack wears his gaudiest hawaiian print
  • ryan switches his black face paint for blue (sometimes he’ll even add stars)
  • the lads load up on homemade grenades and bombs that sparkle and whizz as they detonate
  • they hit every major bank and big business within the city limits as the los santos sky explodes with color
  • on july 5th, planned parenthood, greenpeace, the national immigration law center, the trevor project, the ACLU and countless other NGOs get their annual summer donation - always impressive, always anonymous
  • bc the fakes know that they’re country is no longer truly the land of the free
  • and they may be criminals but goddamnit they’ll do their best to fix it
  • bc who better than america’s most wanted can give america what it needs the most?
2

Hello

At last, the first in a series of interconnecting one shots about my Victuri Merman AU!

I had so much fun drawing these, I hope you guys like them! These two drawings are based on the last scene in this one shot :D

This first one shot is bit short and possibly a bit slow but you need to know how they met first :) Then it’s just going to be fluff for days~

I haven’t written fanfiction in about 6 years. Please have mercy X’D

This is the only place this fic is posted at the moment since I don’t have an AO3 account. Anyone wanna help a fan out and send me an invite so I don’t have to go on a waiting list? X’D

Relatively short introductory one shot under the cut.

Keep reading

2

red lips, nasa eyes 💋💫💙

scene from next season of riverdale

Archie: Oh hey Gay Kevin how was your summer 
Gay Kevin: Actually archie, im called Achillean Kevin now. I have a blog!
Veronica (while applying red lipstick and eyeliner sharp enough to well you know): well Kevin we support you no matter what
Cheryl Blossom: hey everyone. :) shut the hell up and listen :) jughead is killing and eating polly Cooper and he’s doing it right now ;*

anonymous asked:

the antis have spoken, two ghosts isn't about louis because louis doesn't wear red lipstick. even though the word lipstick is not in the lyrics. two ghosts is about taylor because she is the only person in the universe to have red lips. the fact that she has no tattoos does not matter because louis does not wear red lipstick. how could i have been so blind to this all along?

[packs up bags] damn. they really got me there. guess i gotta, like, go or something.

Okay, Lili and Cole are wearing such date material outfits and all I want now is a full body picture of the two, because her in her cute leather skirt and sneakers and him in his rolled up jeans and boots look like absolute babes and a gorgeous couple that people envy on the streets <3 

(If Lili had chosen a scarlet red lipstick too I would have been even more dead than I already am with how stunning she looks. Still she is a bombshell though!)

Thursday 4.05.17 at 8.26pm

Translation by myself (and Google Translate)
Sana & Noora

~~~

Hi, is this the couple counselor?

I have studied tons of YT-vidz about how blonde girls with red lipstick can get over alpha-porshe-driving-boys

Ahah
What’s the recipe?

Switching focus, seeking out new environments, meeting new people, removing him from social media, downloading Tinder and hanging out with your coolest friend

Tinder is not gonna happen

Agreed. Drop that one

But then we need to get Eva to join

Eva?

My coolest friend 😏 😏 😏

smh

jfwy
we’re such nerds
But I’m not interested in having a boyfriend anyway

Now, when you say this, the opposite will happen. What Vilde said is bs, this is The Real Secret

lol

||Fuck Me|| Aiden Steiner Imagine

{Requested: Hi :) Can I request a imagine with Aiden Steiner, like something cute or with angst? I don’t see much imagines about him. Thank you!}

“Why have you been hanging out with Stiles so much?“Aiden asked as I opened my locker.
"Good afternoon to you to babe."I mumbled, slamming my locker on his fingers.
Aiden cursed out loud as he removed his fingers from my locker, glaring at me with rage.
"Seriously (Y/N)?"He asked.
"Stiles is an interesting angsty human who entertains me with his paranoia and ability to stress over the simplest of things."I answered, glaring at him.
"Since I answered, it’s your turn. Why are you hanging out with Lydia so much?"I asked, balling my hands into fists.
"I’m trying to earn her trust, you know, using her to get into Scott’s pack."Aiden answered
"Hmmm and is that why you have red lipstick on your neck?"I asked, making Aiden’s eyes widen.
I grabbed his hair and slammed his head against the locker next to mine.
"If I find out you kiss her again, you won’t live another day to kiss your precious red headed bitch."I spat before walking away.
Two years ago, Ethan and Aiden had murdered everyone in my pack but me and my alpha. My alpha was an absolute dick so when Aiden told me he’d let me kill my alpha instead of him and his twin brother doing it, I did it. I found Ethan who had just walked in on Danny and some random guy making out.
"Seriously?"Ethan asks.
"Tsk tsk Danny, we both know Ethan is way better. No offense dude."I said, smiling at the guy.
I wrapped my arm around his shoulder and dragged him out of there.
"I say we throw a party, a great party to forget all about this!"I suggested, making Ethan grin.
"You just want a reason to party."He mumbled, rolling his eyes.
"Ah, you caught me. Cmon Eth, it’s not like a party ever killed anyone."I told him.
"Actually Lydia almost died-”
“Shut up, that was like a school dance thing, not a party."I muttered as Ethan and I walked to P.E.
"Someone doesn’t like Lydia…"Ethan teased, making me snarl at him.
"Someone doesn’t like Ethan…"I teased as Danny walked by.
Ethan glared at me, making me smirk. We parted ways, going to different locker rooms. Once we got changed into our P.E clothes, I met up with Ethan who was by Aiden.
"What’s the deal with coach?"I asked as he screamed at Greenberg.
"Greenberg spilled water on the floor."Ethan answered, making me grin.
"Oh Greenberg."I mumbled, laughing as Coach continued to scream at him.
I looked over to see Stiles, Scott, and Lydia. I never even noticed when Aiden left us to go stand by her side.
"That’s why someone doesn’t like Lydia."Ethan whispered, smirking.
"Oh look, Danny is waving at you."I lied, making him look around.
"Not funny."Ethan grumbled as I walked over to coach.
He started saying some crap about how Greenberg got on his nerves. It wasn’t until I heard Coach’s whistle go off that I snapped out of my daydream. I groaned as I covered my ears.
”(Y/L/N), you’re on McCall’s team.“Coach said , making me cheer.
Scott smiled as I walked over to them, amused at my delight to be in his team.
"What, I like being in the winning team."I shrugged only to make him smile wider.
"Do you even know what we’re playing?"Stiles asked as I rolled my head back, cracking my neck.
"Don’t care, as long as I get to win."I answered, making Scott laugh.
Coach brought out red balls and I swear my day had gotten better. Ah, dodgeball, the sport I could get away with throwing balls at people and not getting in trouble.
"Oh no…"Stiles mustered, fearful of getting hit.
"Don’t worry Stiles, I got your back."I told him, making him cheer up.
Once Coach blew the whistle, Scott and I dashed to the middle of the gym and grabbed as many dodge balls as we could. I spotted Ethan reaching down to grab one, making me throw it at him.
"Really?"Ethan asked as he started walking away.
I smirked until out of the corner of my eyes I saw a ball flying in my direction. I immediately ducked and threw it at Greenberg. Greenberg groaned as the ball his his face. I expected Coach to give me a warning but instead he gave me grin and a thumbs up. Soon enough the only ones left on the other side were Aiden, Lydia, and some girl hiding in the back. Lydia hid behind Aiden, making me glare at her. Scott, Stiles and I were the only ones left. Stiles threw the ball at Aiden, unfortunately Aiden caught it.
"Dammit."Stiles muttered before walking away.
Ethan walked back in, glaring at me.
"Shit."I muttered knowing I practically had a target on my back.
Ethan threw the ball at me and luckily I caught it, making Stiles cheer as he walked back in.
"Told you I had your back."I mumbled, patting his back.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw Aiden grow tense before aiming at Stiles. I immediately in front of Stiles, catching the ball as I fell on top of Stiles.
"I want you on my team forever."Stiles spoke up, making me laugh.
Scott threw the ball at the girl hiding in the back, so only Lydia was left. I clenched my jaw as I saw her widen her eyes.
"I got this."I muttered before launching the ball at her.
Lydia stumbled back as the ball hit her face. She grabbed her nose as blood trickled down.
"McCall wins!"Coach yelled, making Scott and I cheer.
Stiles immediately ran over to Lydia’s side, helping her up from the floor. Scott noticed Lydia bleeding and followed after Stiles.
I lifted my shirt, wiping the sweat off my face before walking back to Coach. The whole rest of the class was just us running and playing dodgeball. Lucky this was the last class of the day, so when the bell rang, I ran off to the locker room. I quickly changed and started walking out until I found Lydia wiping blood off her p.e shirt. I frowned as I felt something new, I felt guilty. Aiden is using her, no girl should be used.
"Hey Lydia, I’m sorry about the whole nosebleed situation."I spoke up as I walked over to her.
"Just keep your werewolf strength under control next time."Lydia mumbled, not looking up at me.
"Lyd-”
“Okay I know you don’t like me (Y/N), it’s obvious. I don’t want to talk."She snapped.
I sighed and started walking away until I turned back around.
"Lydia-”
“What?"She asked, sighing.
"Don’t trust Aiden, Aiden is only using you to get into your pack."I warned, making her furrow her eyebrows.
"I know because he told me."I mumbled, making her clench her hands into fists.
She shoved her t-shirt into her gym bag before marching over to me.
"Why are you telling me this?"She asked.
"Because you’re a girl, and I always hated the competition between girls. Everyone knows I love competition, but not when it’s between two girls. I believe all girls should be untied, they should be a team and not compete against each other."I explained, making her facial expression soften.
"Thanks for warning me (Y/N)."She whispered, smiling.
"You deserve to know."I said before walking out the door.
I felt someone hit the door, making me rush out.
"Oh god."Stiles muttered as he held his head.
"Stiles where you waiting outside the girls locker room?"I asked, realizing I had hit him with the door.
"Me, pfft, no, never."Stiles answered, trying to regain his ‘cool’ composure.
"Maybe?"Stiles mumbled as Lydia and I glared at him.
"Stiles-”
“Okay, fine, I was! You happy?"Stiles asked, making me nod.
I exited hell-oh I meant school, same thing though. I walked over to my car and waited for Ethan. Ethan raced over and grinned widely as he hopped into the passengers seat.
"Lydia is embarrassing Aiden in front of the whole school."Ethan said, making me grin.
I stepped on the gas pedal and sped off, leaving him at school. Once we had gotten home, I had ten missing calls from Aiden. I kept ignoring his calls and headed out with Ethan to buy stuff for the glow in the dark party we were secretly having at Derek’s place. Ethan had invited Danny, no wonder he was such in a good mood. Once everything was set up, Isaac, Ethan, Danny, and I invited everyone we knew. Soon enough, Derek’s loft was filled with people. Scott and Kira were talking outside while Ethan and Danny were dancing with glow in the dark paint on them. Stiles and I were currently dancing horribly, covered most of our body with glow in the dark paint. After awhile of dancing, there was a loud bang. Stiles and I immediately grabbed onto each other. We all turned our heads to look and find Derek glaring at everyone.
"Oh shit."Stiles muttered.
"Get out!"Derek yelled, making Stiles and I flinch.
Everyone ran outside while Stiles and I hid under a table. It wasn’t until I heard a growl that Stiles and I peaked out from under the table.
"Guys, they’re all looking at me. Why are they all looking at me?"Aiden asked as Oni stared at him.
"Stay here."I whispered to Stiles before shifting into my werewolf form.
Derek, Scott, and I attack the Oni. Derek manages to break one of their necks but was thrown across the room. Isaac and I took out our claws and attacked one Oni at the same time. The Oni pulled a sword out which made Isaac back away. The Oni swung its sword at me, making me duck. The sword just barely misses my head, making me let out a shaky breath. Before I could even move, an Oni behind me swung his sword down at my shoulder. Aiden screamed my name as I screamed in agony, blood gushing onto the floor. Isaac grabs me and pulls me out of dangers way. I start screaming as I see an Oni pull a sword out of Aiden’s chest. Aiden falls onto his knees , making tears stream down my face. I shove Isaac off of me and rush to his side as the sun comes up. The Oni disappear into thin air as I pull him onto my lap.
"Aiden, Aiden?"I asked as I shook him.
Aiden wouldn’t move, making me sob uncontrollably as I held him. It wasn’t until I heard his heart start to beat. He gasped for air as his claws sunk it me, grabbing onto me tightly.
"What happened?"Aiden asked as he looked up at my red teary face.
"You fucking asshole, I thought you were fucking dead!"I screamed shoving him off of me.
"How’s that my fault?"Aiden asked.
"Don’t fucking die!"I yelled, making everyone snort.
"You were scared for me?"He asked, making me furrow my eyebrows.
"Are you fucking kidding me? I broke down and started crying uncontrollably and you have the fucking audacity to fucking ask me the stupidest question I’ve ever fucking heard?"I asked, making Aiden smirk.
"You care for me-”
“You ever try scaring me like that again, I’ll kill you myself."I warned, making him grab my face and smash his lips against mine.
I shoved him off of and slapped him.
"You dare kiss me when I’m clearly upset with you?"I asked in disbelief.
I cupped his face, smashing my lips against his.
"So are they together or is she free?"Isaac asked.
"They’re not officially dating but they are possessive over each other."Ethan answered as Aiden and I pull away.
"I fucking hate you."I growled as Aiden rested his forehead against mine.
"You fucking love me."Aiden growled, cupping my face again.
"Damn right I do."I muttered before climbing on top of him.
"That’s our cue to leave!"Ethan yelled as I ripped Aiden’s shirt off.
Everyone ran outside while Aiden ripped my shirt off.
"I fucking love you too."Aiden whispered as his teeth grazed against the skin on my collar bone.
"Fuck you."I muttered as he ripped my jeans off, making him smirk.
"I think what you were trying to say was, ‘fuck me’.”——–
Thank you for taking time out of your day to read this. I hope you enjoy it and have a wonderful/night!

Cherry Lips (Negan x Kimi)

Word Count: 2,762
Genre: Smut
Fandoms: Negan, The Walking Dead, Jeffrey Dean Morgan
Pairings: Negan x Kimi (Original Female Character)
Rating: Explicit
AO3 Link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/10910652
Warnings: Language. Confrontation. Firearms. Shooting guns. Near car accident. Inappropriate erections. Writing on skin. Oral sex. Blowjob with teeth. Vaginal Sex.

Summary: Written for Ash’s Negan Writing Challenge. Negan picks up a haul from Alexandria and is then held at gunpoint by a rival group. He meets his match in their bold red-lipsticked leader, Kimi, who demands a private meeting to negotiate a naughty trade.

Negan and his men were headed back to the Sanctuary from Alexandria after a very successful pickup. Negan didn’t need to be there but he went along to indulge in his favorite pastime of antagonizing Rick. Driving along the wooded path, his truck first in the line of vehicles, he smirked to himself and tapped the steering wheel to the beat of a song that only he could hear.

“You’re in a good mood today,” Simon said, side-eying the boss man a bit. Of course, while there was respect between the two men, Simon didn’t think of Negan as his boss, but more of an equal. For the most part, Negan felt the same, and that was why their relationship went on so smoothly compared to the way things were with the other Saviors.

Negan whistled and slapped the steering wheel. “You’re damn fucking right I’m in a good mood, buddy boy! There is nothing I love more than getting under Rick the Prick’s skin.” He laughed, picturing what the scene back at Alexandria must be like after he left Rick emasculated once again. “Did you see him squirming back there? Fucking priceless.”

“That I did, boss. That I did. I think we got ourselves the ideal whipping boy.” Simon nodded his head with satisfaction and took a swig from the can of orange soda that he had pilfered from their haul, wiping the neon liquid from his thick mustache. “Goddamn, life is good.”

Just as Negan was about to agree with him, the front tire of the truck was shot out. The truck skidded and came close to wrapping itself around a tree before Negan could get the brakes to do their job. “What the shit? Lucille, give me strength!”

In front of them, partially concealed by the dense growth of the woods, was a band of survivors outfitted with a respectable arsenal. Negan’s men were already out of their trucks and aiming their weapons at this new group when Negan stepped out and commanded them to hold their fire.

“Weapons down,” he said assuredly, directing his words to both his men and theirs, approaching these newcomers without apprehension. “If you wanted us dead, you would have shot us by now. I’m a man who likes to negotiate. What is it that you’re after?”

Keep reading

“Add a little lipstick, hun.”
my grandma used to always say,
it baffled her the way
I would leave the house each day
bare lipped and bold,
almost naked, with a sway
to my hips that would put 
wheat stalks to shame.

It wasn’t ladylike,
she thought I was putting up a fight,
but really I just knew I was a sight,
a girl with a big bite 
and chapped, cracked, broken open
lips that were too light,
her mouth would turn up bright
at my rebellion-
I think she was proud that I 
was living up to my namesake.


And now, I still hear her voice in my head
“Add a little lipstick, hun”
as I shock everyone,
with my overdone
red lipstick
because I have no more expectations to outrun,
oh, and she would be stunned,
by the way my painted mouth curls
at her memory.

—  For my Grandma Liv || O.L.