i have no words to describe how much i love this

polym78  asked:

Honestly, I love your post! It brought tears to my eyes, really. Mainly cos I can relate to you quite a lot. I'm naturally a shy person, tho my job made hide it a little bit, and, also, I second guess everything I want to post here to the point I never did so far. I only reblog. And I rarely dare to send asks to other simblrs. Thank you for your support. It means the world to me 💓

I don’t know how many times I rewrited this answer, I just don’t know what to say because WOW, that must have been a huge step for you to send this ask, I know how hard it can be! I do that too, all the time doubting everything I post. Thank you for this dear, this meant so much to me I don’t have words to describe it. Ok now I’m crying. Please start making your own posts, I’d love to see them, you’re awesome! ❤️

there were a lot of references in the new video, did you catch them all? let’s take a look.

1. nils sjoberg

remember that time she wrote a song with calvin harris but used a different name? this is that name, on one of the gravestones. after releasing that she had actually written the summer hit “this is what you came for,” calvin harris, among others, threw a fit on twitter - even though it had been agreed that if calvin and taylor broke up, she could express that she had written the song.

2. the out of the woods dress

this blue dress probably looks familiar! it’s the same one she wore in the out of the woods music video, the last music video of the 1989 era. this poses the same frantic question, are we out of the woods yet? as this grave-digging taylor suggests, not yet.

3. here lies 2014 met gala taylor

at first glance, it just looks like the taylor from before laying there, but after pausing it and going back, one realizes that isn’t zombie taylor, rather 2014 met gala taylor. 2014 would have been the start of the 1989 era, and the out of the woods video was the end of it, thus: by the end of 1989 era, she was ready to “bury” it.

4. the dollar bill

if you look just next to taylor’s shoulder, you can see a good ole george washington. one single dollar bill. is this a reference to taylor’s sexual assault trial recently, and the one dollar she won then? most likely, because if you go to other shots of her in the tub that aren’t directly above her, the dollar bill isn’t there, meaning it was edited in later, which would explain how it got there so late in the game. it stands for the simple victories everyone else gets to celebrate, while she does the same things and gets flack for it.

5. et tu brute

a famous line from shakespeare’s julius caeser, “et tu, brute” means “and you, brute?” right as marcus brutus lands the fatal blow in julius caeser’s, his once-friend’s back. this is a metaphor for all the people that taylor thought she could trust, before they turned around and trashed her name.

6. the tea

probably pretty simple to grasp - the tea is hot. alternatively, she, the snake in the video, gets to serve the tea this time around, or, she gets to lay down her side of the story.

7. car crash + paparazzi

did you see what happened here, at face value? taylor was in an expensive vehicle that got in a head-on crash, but everyone just stood back and took pictures, instead of rushing over to help. is this a reference to all the times that everyone stood back, took pictures, and laughed at her when she was beaten down? yes.

8. the grammy

the grammy blends in with the gold of the car and her outfit, so it’s pretty easy to miss, but there it is, in her hand, even though the car crashed. perhaps the future is being predicted?

9. the birdcage + leg tattoo

look closely at taylor’s leg, and you can see what looks to be a snake tattooed there. not to mention, here she is entertaining in a birdcage, which is guarded. she’s trying to have fun in this prison, biting her tongue, being the girl everyone wants, but she longs to be let free.

10. robbing a bank/stream co., blind for love

besides getting major harley quinn vibes, what else do we notice here? taylor swift robbing a vault, which says “stream company.” remember that time that taylor wrote an open letter to apple music and called her money hungry, even though she was taking her music off to benefit poorer artists? yes, we do. this is what she’s referencing here. also, her shirt says “blind for love” which makes sense, because she frequently refers to herself as a hopeless romantic, someone who opens theirselves up for love, even if it means getting hurt.

11. the squad

without explaining anything else, this scene can be described as a crowd of blank faced people, staring at taylor swift, who stands upon a stage looking menacing, and impressing one message upon the crowd: u, squad. it’s reminiscent of all the times people said taylor swift was over, because her friends, fans, or sales were fake or temporary. this is like a visual representation of the comments people made about taylor forcing people to do things for her to create the image she desired.

12. fake friends

and here we have the mannequins of the girls from the prior scene, chopped up. this one is pretty straight forward, these “friends” that taylor thought she had sometimes turned out to be more fickle and “fake” than she thought. also, can we talk about how taylor’s red boots are reminiscent of kinky boots? because yes.

13. the dancers, i heart ts

before taylor enters the room, the dancers are goofing around, but the second she comes in, the jump to attention, and rip off their jackets to reveal shirts that say “i heart ts.” it’s a throwback to when tom hiddleston wore a shirt with the same message on the fourth of july in 2016, and everyone said that she had forced him to wear it. it’s the same thing as before with the squad - the world decided that she had forced all these people to love her, not that they actually did.

14. the fight for glory

every time you pause this video, you come across a different taylor. squirrel pajamas wanegbt taylor, 2015 bbma’s taylor, 2014 acm’s taylor, wanegbt red tour taylor, 2016 new years rockin’ eve taylor, sparkly guitar fearless tour taylor, bleachella taylor, ballerina shake it off taylor, 2016 vma’s taylor… the list goes on and on. here, you can see them all fighting and clawing, trying to stand on top. it reminds me of “i don’t like your kingdom keys, they once belonged to me,” and the parallels between long live and new romantics in that line alone. all those times, she thought she’d made it to a point in her career where she could be respected as much as other artists in her tier, only to harshly realize she was going to get her name ran through the mud for doing the same thing as everyone else. the fight for glory is steep, and unfair.

15. junior jewels

looks familiar right? not quite! it is the same theme of the shirt, but look closely at the signatures - they’re signatures of actual people this time around. names like ed, selena, este, lena, blake, and ryan, among others, can be seen on her shirt, representing the true friends that stuck with her through her reputation being bashed.

16. “SHUT UP!”

here, all the different versions of taylor are repeating things that the media or other celebrities had said about her, until finally 2009 vma’s taylor repeated the same thing that 2017 taylor said in an instagram post - “i’d very much like to be excluded from this narrative.” the entire time, you can hear camera shutters going off and people chatting, presumably the rest of the world watching as she got torn apart. when vma’s taylor makes this final statement, all the other taylor’s, as well as what sounds to be an entire off-screen crowd, yell “SHUT UP” before the screen goes black. this is a powerful image, and it’s supposed to be. all the times she suffered, and people told her that she was overreacting, faking it, or doing it for publicity. if you feel remorse for seeing young taylor getting yelled at, or sorrow for the taylors falling when she said “because she’s dead,” you’re doing it right. 

nothing in this video was an accident.

if you’re angry at taylor for this video exposing things you said about her, or you’re repeating any of the words the versions of herself said at the end, you’re proving her point. her reputation was destroyed because people made a sport of making fun of her. and now, as taylor said, there will be no explanation, just reputation. 

8

170528 Baekhyun’s famous words

(t/n: in korean, ‘pen’ and ‘fan’ sounds the same. hence why he created this metaphor saying fans are the pen while exo is the book ;;____;;)

DO BTS REALLY CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER?!

Whenever it’s a birthday or a celebration they never forget about each other. For example, when Jin wasn’t able to attend his graduation ceremony (they knew he was sad) so they celebrated with him

Originally posted by allthingsnamjin

When one of them stops acting his usual way they know it. 

Originally posted by slapmon

They are always silently taking care of one another, be it when they are awake or asleep.

Originally posted by vkook-appreciation

When one of them cry the others run to hug him and console him. 

Originally posted by kimtaehyung11

Even if it is just a small task they offer a hand

Originally posted by jiminpoppins

Be it singing, dancing or producing, they are always teaching and assisting one another where they lack. 

Originally posted by bangtoori

When they get each other gifts even if it’s not their birthday

Originally posted by yoongles

When they feel the pain of each other with just a glance. There was a time Jin hurt his neck and Jimin saw that he was struggling so Jimin kept cheering him up.

Originally posted by pjxmin

Even before debuting they stood by one another at hard times

Originally posted by gotbangboys

Even Bang Pd and the staff at BigHit can’t believe how much love they have for one another

These boys don’t see BTS just as a business but as a family who holds each member dearly. 

Originally posted by gdiminyoongi

So how much do BTS care for one another? I don’t think even words like “greatly” or “remarkably” can describe it well. But I will let their deeds define it better than any speech.

By @mimibtsghost

WHY I LOVE U

Venus in Aries: I heard your laughter before I saw you. And then I couldn’t take my eyes off you. And after everyone had gone home we were still running around, or you were running I was just trying to keep up. You work hard, play hard and love even harder, but you like to try on a couple of sizes before you find the right fit. It’s the way you make me laugh at the most ludicrous things, the way you know exactly what you want and are not afraid to go and get it. You make me feel like anything is possible. Our love was like a tickle war turned makeout session, and I still remember the heat when our skin touched. There will never be anyone like you. 

Venus in Taurus: Being with you is like coming home. Like a perfect dream. Like lavender candles and cuddling up to a marathon of our favourite show. You kissing me between every episode. You don’t like playing games and you don’t like being rushed when falling in love. You take your sweet time, worshipping my body and my mind so my heart can’t help but follow. I remember those lazy Sundays, strolling through the furniture store, your hand in mine and we would pretend to decorate our future house. But all we came out with were more lavender candles and a burning lust for each other. You turn the mundane into something truly magical. 

Venus in Gemini: You drive me crazy, I never know where we stand. We spend the most incredible nights together and then I don’t hear from you in forever. Maybe that’s your style, you wanna look me in the eyes and not read my words on your phone. We sit for hours and people watch, making up backstories for them. When I’m with you I have no sense of time, all I can think about is your mischievous smile and the way you play with my hair. Your love is all-consuming, like nothing in the world matters to you more. With you my sense of reason is completely clouded, I’m yours for the night and every other night. If you’ll have me. 

Venus in Cancer: My hero, my sensitive babe. Your heart on your sleeve, that look in your eyes and I was yours forever. When you kissed me I could see our lives flashing before my eyes. Sitting on opposite sides of the sofa. Your nose in a book but your hand on me, like you needed to be connected to me or else you’d die. Every time you catch me staring at you I can’t help the grin on my face. You are fragile and strong, creating this protective space around us where we can just be together. I love how you’re not afraid of your feelings, and how you already named our kids even though we need to discuss it lol. You make it feel so real, like you are the missing piece of the puzzle. 

Venus in Leo: I remember the first time I met you, it all happened so fast. At a party, my friend introducing you and before I knew it your arms were around me. I remember melting into your hug, and the electricity in the air when we finally let go. Everyone else thought it was weird but we both knew, there was no turning back. Being with you feels like running through a field of flowers, faster and faster. Your laughter and your moans echo in my head. My legs feel like giving out but your hand refuses to let go of mine. It’s that smile after you say something clever, and they way you make me feel like it’s just me and you versus the world. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this loved. 

Venus in Virgo: You make me feel whole. Driving down the freeway blasting our songs, I can’t sing but you don’t care. Your hand on the stick shift and for some reason I got all hot inside. It’s the way you wrap your arms around me at the checkout line, like I’m yours and you don’t care who knows. You’re thoughtful and observant, you make me feel like I matter to you. And it’s not an act, you are actually that kind. I’m trying so hard to describe you, but all I can think about is that night when my family fell apart. You drew a bath with bubbles and you held me until the water went cold. Then we ate raspberries (my favourite) and watched Modern Family. And then you loved me until I didn’t feel like I was falling apart anymore. I think that describes you more than words ever could. You’re the one I see sitting next to me on our porch doing a crossword puzzle, in our old bodies. But it doesn’t scare me because your spirit is forever young. 

Venus in Libra: Being in love with you is so easy. Our first date was to the movies. You gave me a red poppy and held my hand the entire time, gently playing with my fingers. My heart was about to beat out of my chest but somehow I was calm, because you were. I love the way you talk so easy, with that breezy confidence. Like you’d never tell me a lie. The way you were charming and kind to everyone from the bus driver to the server at the pizza shop. After talking to each other all night in the park, it was the only place that was still open. My mum still asks about you. I think she loved you more than I did, and that’s saying something. 

Venus in Scorpio: God, the way you tear me apart and then put me back together. Over and over again. You of all people know that life isn’t always chocolates and roses. You’re not afraid of the ugliness of human nature, instead you try to find the silver lining, the beauty in the madness. You demand that I’m honest with you, and in turn you trust me with your own secrets. It created a bond beyond love, or maybe it was love. It just felt different, like it was based in reality and not a love story. You’ve seen me at my worst and still think I’m beautiful, because you see people’s souls. Nobody can hide their true nature from you for you are an expert of reading between the lines. Your animalistic passion penetrates deep, and everything becomes a haze of lust and obsession. Because if you’re not obsessed it’s just not worth it. I would trust you with my life, because you would sacrifice your own for the one you love. 

Venus in Sagittarius: We had just gotten comfortable on the top of the mountain we climbed when you hit me with “Do you think out of seven billion that some people have the same personality?” And you packed my favourite sandwich, tomato, mozzarella and basil. A moment of breathless kisses and triumph. Your strength made me feel strong too, and your devotion made my heart swell. You never stand still but it doesn’t matter, because you take me with you and always make sure I’m alright. You make me feel included, showing me off and introducing me to all your friends. I’ve never felt more proud than when I’m standing next to you. When you told me how much you loved me I knew it was true. 

Venus in Capricorn: The true romantic. What drew me in was that calm stare, you looked like trouble I swear I was gonna faint on the spot. You could keep up with me, and when you took my hand and said “Trust me?” I somehow believed you. But what made me fall for you was how you kept all your promises. Your presence is honest and true, the way you make me feel like I would never be alone, like I would always have a friend. I love falling asleep in your arms to your heartbeat. You’re gentle with me, I can feel your love in every touch. Your love made me believe I could do anything, because I knew you would stick by my side. If I asked you to. 

Venus in Aquarius: Keep it cool, that’s how you roll. Almost untouchable, but you let me touch you. It was like the seasons changed in seconds. You finished that last drop of champagne and said “Let’s get wet”, then we jumped in the pool. And then you kissed me. It felt like breathing underwater, I don’t even think you live in the same world as the rest of us. I texted you at 2 a.m. and you didn’t hesitate. Trapped between your body and the wall, your lips on my neck and I was already in heaven. I never thought you loved me back, until you showed up on my doorstep, whiskey on your breath and tears in your eyes. After that I never doubted you, because I knew then that your love was more than words. 

Venus in Pisces: With you it’s all about the moment, and moments with you are plush and whimsical. Like sitting on a cloud. You are still the only person to ever write me a poem. And when you asked me if I liked it, how you let me see your vulnerable side even though the look in your eyes was sheer terror, you were brave. I was at loss for words so I just kissed you deeply. You see the beauty in the little things, like asking me about what I dreamt last night or giving me cupid earrings so they could whisper sweet nothings in my ear when you’re not around. Your love is poetic, you actually think of me and what makes me happy. Whenever you see something that reminds you of me you always let me know. I can’t help but think how lucky I am to be so cherished.

“My mom doesn’t believe in love. I think she stopped after my dad painted her soft skin with the harsh colors of blue and purple one too many times. Or maybe it was after the nights he came home smelling of cheap perfume she’d never wear. Or no, I bet she stopped when he picked their son as the canvas for his unwarranted anger. Growing up, she’d tell me that she’d pray God would make her heart like stone, like the rocks that the sea beats against over and over; she craved their inability to feel. She claims her prayers were answered, but sometimes, when she sees old couples walking hand in hand still very much in love, she turns to me with a sad smile and reveals that she always thought that’d be her and him and I have to look away. That smile, it’s her achilles heel; it tells of her shattered dreams and whispers softly of her broken heart.

My mom doesn’t believe in love. As soon as I could understand the concept she drilled it into my head that there was no such thing. She thought it was a waste of time, sneered at those who tried to say it was one of the things worth living for. Unnecessary, dangerous was how she described it. She said she’d be damned if I fell into its trap and ruined my life for a boy that would leave me broken.

Now I don’t know how to tell her that I feel the things she warned against. I dont know how to tell her that my heart jumps when I look into his eyes or press my lips to his. I don’t know how to tell her that I fell for a boy with plain brown eyes and a smile that reminds me of the sun. I don’t know how to tell her that I gave him my heart and now he has the power to ruin me.

She’s going to be so disappointed.”


- n.g //

list of things in look what you made me do that were fucking amazing:

  • the TS as the camera hovers above the clouds 
  • ‘Here Lies Taylor Swift’s Reputation’ followed by 1989 era zombie Taylor in the Out of the Woods blue dress (her last video of the 1989 era, excluding New Romantics which was tour footage) climbing back up from the dead
  • The tilted headstones which she ‘fixes’
  • Nils Sjoberg, the pseudonym Taylor wrote This Is What You Came For under was seen on a gravestone
  • The $1 note in the bathtub that she won from her recent sexual assault trial whilst bathing in riches, a dig at people who accused her of being money hungry (whether it be the trial or in general)
  • The numerous references to snakes…. the snake ring, sitting on a throne with snakes around her, swinging in a snake cage… then sipping her tea on the throne
  • ‘Et Tu Brute’ is written on her throne and the on the columns of that shot (used to express surprise and dismay at the treachery of a supposed friend)
  • The Grammy in her hand when she crashes the car. The car is a maserati. ‘Maserati down a dead-end street…’ I wonder what song that lyric is from? Did you say Red by Taylor Swift? And she’s holding a grammy? RRRRRRrrrrandom access memories? Hmm
  • As she swings in the snake cage, everyone guards her… a metaphor for how she was treated during that time 
  • Literally wearing a cathead and a ‘Blind for Love’ sweater, she robs a bank titled ‘Stream Co.’, referencing how everyone says she’s money-hungry since when she removed her money from Spotify and the Apple Music letter 
  • The names of all her friends are on her Junior Jewels shirt
  • The word Squad flashed on screens as all these women are aligned up, wearing similar wear to the Bad Blood music video, referencing how everyone kept categorising her friends as a ‘Squad’ even though she’s never explicitly called it that or intended for it to be that 
  • Coming into the room and having a scribe immediately write stuff down. When people described her as a ‘Diva’
  • The ‘I Love TS’ croptops the dancers wear…. a reference to a shirt an ex of her wore last year and people dragged her for that
  • Standing on top of all old versions of her from the You belong with Me video, Shake It Off video, WANEGBT video, Fearless Tour, The Red Tour, Out of the Woods…. as she declares ‘The Old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now… cause she’s dead….’
  • The ending dialogue, where variations of Taylor appear, throwing back everyone’s joke: ‘Stop making that surprised face, it’s so annoying’, ‘What’s with that bitch? Don’t call me that?, ‘Y’all!’, ‘Stop acting like you’re all nice, you are so fake!’, ‘Oh there she goes, playing the victim again’, ‘HISS!’, ‘What are you doing? Getting receipts! Gonna edit this later!’, ‘Uh, I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative…. SHUT UP!’
5

I HAVE THE BEST HUSBAND.

All other husbands have to step up their game.
I AM PUTTING YOU ALL ON NOTICE.

Because this is what Werepenguin just gave me. He saw the commission that the amazingly-sweet and wonderfully-talented @yliseryn did for me of Allura in my wedding dress, and this idea began to form in his mind.

And this? This isn’t just Allura in my wedding dress. It’s Shiro in Werepenguin’s suit & tie. That’s OUR cake with OUR cake topper. And then Louise, being the utter sweetheart she is, added the b&w images. And then Werepenguin asked her for color versions of THOSE.

And, on top of all of this, I now have a 20x30 METAL PRINT of that top image that I can hang in our home so everyone can see it. Because this is how happy the memory of our wedding day makes him, even 8 years out. (Well, almost 8 years; he gave this to me as an early anniversary present because he couldn’t stand to sit on it any longer.)

I cried when he gave it to me. I’m crying a bit now. I married the most wonderful man and he is absolutely the best thing in my life and if there’s anything that proves that it’s that I cannot come up with the words to describe how I feel.

@joshkeaton @thebestlaurenmontgomery @bext-k

I am not good with words, never have been and never will be, but I could write pages upon pages describing you and how much I love you
—  Day 234
2

SECRET SESSIONS LONDON - MY STORY💕

13/10/17 (aka THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE)

okay so where do I begin…WOW.
okay so… on Monday October 3rd at 10:25pm, I was sitting on my phone in my room listening to holy ground and I was on twitter and BOOM. “TAYLOR NATION SENT YOU A DIRECT MESSAGE” I STARTED SHAKING AND CRYING WHEN I READ THE CONFIDENTIAL MESSAGE I WAS SO CONFUSED BECAUSE THEY DONT EVEN FOLLOW ME (yes I’m still trying to work out technology ok) AND I FLIPPED OUT AND I RAN INTO MY MOMS ROOM SOBBING AND I TRIPPED OVER THE HOOVER BUT ITS OKAY. MY MOM WAS SAYING ALL SORTS OF THINGS LIKE SOMEONE MAY HAVE HACKED INTO TAYLOR NATIONS ACCOUNT (?????? idk). Anyway I died and my mind was a mess and I couldn’t control myself at all, I had knew what it usually meant when people got these messages and I explained everything to my mom ( she is genuinely worst-case-scenario-Christine ) and she started crying with happiness for me. THAT DAY WILL ALWAYS BE REMEMBERED.

The next day October 4th at 5:27pm, I was (trying) to study when BOOM. I RECEIVED THE CALL. Ali phoned and told me about a special secret event on Friday the 13th of October and I was shaking so so much and could barely even talk but she was honestly the nicest ever (I noticed she said “wonderful” about a million times and I’m now so in love with that word). Side note: My mom still wasn’t really convinced this wasn’t a set up to get me kid napped but SHE FINALLY CALMED DOWN A LITTLE AND MEANWHILE I WAS SHAKING, CRYING AND BASICALLY DEAD.

Okay so then it was the waiting game…the days DRAGGED in as I found out a whole 10 DAYS before the event and I saw Taylor lurk people on tumblr/Instagram AND she liked the post about me and my best friend Eve. PEOPLE WERE ALSO TALKING ABOUT WHAT COULD HAPPEN ON THE 13TH AND I WAS JUST SITTING THERE LIKE HELP ME WHATS GON HAPPEN.

Fast forward to Friday…so because I live in Glasgow I had to fly to London… I COULDNT SLEEP AT ALL AND I ONLY GOT 4 HOURS SLEEP LOL BECAUSE I GOT UP AT 4AM. We went to the airport and I was genuinely so nervous and excited about what could possibly be happening. We then got a bus and then a tube and wandered about Covent Garden and EVERYTHING kept reminding me of Taylor. We then got a tube and another bus ( NUMBER 13 ) to our hotel. I got really stressed out because I opened up my case and there was makeup spilt on my dress BUT MY MOM CAME TO THE RESCUE AND FIXED IT FOR ME. I curled my hair and fixed myself up then I went to out to the secret meeting point and recognized so many people from tumblr/twitter etc and it was SO surreal. ALSO A FEW PEOPLE CAME UP TO ME AND WERE LIKE OMG ABBIE I KNOW YOU AND THAT MADE ME FEEL SO SO SPECIAL SO I LOVE YOU FOR THAT IF THAT WAS YOU. We checked in and got really cool wristbands saying United Kingdom (IN THE REPUTATION FONT) I WAS ALREADY DEAD.

We went to drop off our bags and me and I met 2 beautiful, amazing girls called Emma ( @taylorsmusic ) and Flora ( @spoookyswift ) and we were FREAKING OUT TOGETHER. We just couldn’t comprehend that we could potentially meet our idol. We talked about everything and I genuinely think I have 2 new best friends for life. I LOVE YOU GUYS. We were on the last bus to leave so we waited foreverrrr and my nerves were building up so much and I was FULL ON ALL OVER SHOOK.

Everyone on the bus was SO EXCITED and we were all dying together. It was such a combination of nerves and excitement like I can’t even describe it. So we FINALLY arrived at our secret destination and were escorted to the entrance to be searched etc (there was a big box of socks for some reason and it made us laugh so just thought I’d add that in and also a few half finished smart water bottles👀).

Okay so then we went through to TAYLORS HOUSE. It was beautiful and there was so much food laid out and I had a REPUTATION COOKIE and CUSTOMIZED REPUTATION M&MS and CHICKEN TENDERS. Taylors playlist of the songs she loves was playing in the background and we were LOVING LIFE. (Side note: my mom loved the olives you put out taylor so thanks for that) So basically me, Emma and Flora were chilling together (we were not chill at all tho) and everything was fine THEN Flora goes “oh my god, that’s Scott” AND IM LIKE WTF AND WE ALL LOOK OVER AND DIE LIKE WHAT WAS HAPPENING BEFORE OUR VERY EYES THE KING OF GUITAR PICS WAS HERE. We went and spoke to more amazing people and life was good…THEN TREE COMES THROUGH AND IM LIKE WHATATSTSS THATS A LEGEND THEN NOT LONG AFTER THAT WE SEE ANDREA AND WE ALL DIED. I CRIED WHEN I SEEN ANDREA IDK WHY IT JUST GOT TOO MUCH AND SHES MY QUEEN. IT GENUINELY FELT LIKE A DREAM LIKE SURELY THIS WAS NOT REAL.

Finally, after a while, we went through to THE LIVING ROOM. YES. A CHAIR. A SPEAKER. WE ALL KNEW WHAT THIS WAS. ME, EMMA AND FLORA HAD A LITTLE SUPPORT NETWORK GOING ON BECAUSE WE WERE ALL HOLDING HANDS BECAUSE WE WERE NOT PREPARED AT ALL. I cried - yeah she wasn’t even here yet and I cried. So anyway THEN I’m like I can’t even do this and my heart is beating abnormally fast. And that’s when she appeared…

I COULDNT BELIEVE MY EYES. MY ANGEL. MY EVERYTHING. GENUINELY LIKE A METER AWAY. NO WAY. Okay so then I SOBBED even more and I was uncontrollable (I finally did calm down but omg it was so hard I couldn’t stop crying) - thank you Emma and Flora for helping me LOL. Side note: her hair was so curly and pretty and she wore this camo dress thing and SNAKE BOOOOOOTS and a snake ring and yeah I was like GO GURLLL. IN THAT MOMENT I DIED IT WAS ACTUALLY HAPPENING.

On to the album, obviously you guys understand I can’t say much at all BUT REPUTATION IS MY FAVOURITE ALBUM BY FARRRRR. Like it’s genuinely so different but so genius - it’s incredible. She’s so talented and you can tell she’s worked so super hard for it and I can tell she’s happier than ever through the way she talks and she just seems so content with life and it makes me so proud and happy of how far she’s came. It’s so emotionally complex and THE LYRICS (she’s a genius okay). But there was one song that made me full on SOB and everyone in that room felt something…ANYWAY Taylor herself, during the whole of the session, she was so funny and she’s just so genuine…it was unreal. UNREAL. Some highlights that stand out to me include when during one of the songs she looked right at me for about 20 seconds or so and we just danced and smiled at each other. IVE NEVER FELT SO LOVED IN MY LIFE. To say I’m proud of her for this album is an understatement.

okay so then….IT WAS MEET AND GREET TIME. We were all sitting reading the magazines and talking to each other and it was adorable and even though I was a nervous wreck, everyone was so nice and amazing towards me. When it was time for the picture I was at the waiting point I can’t tell you how I felt. It was indescribable. I seen the 2 girls before me hug Taylor goodbye and it was my turn. I ran up to her and hugged her so hard and she looked at me and went “ITS ABBIE ISNT IT?” AND I WAS NODDING AND I WAS LIKE YEAH ITS ME and she was like “NO WAY I CHOSE YOU LIKE A YEAH AGO LIKE SOOOO LONG AGO” and I was like NO WAY and then I was like “THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING YOUVE HELPED ME THROUGH, YOU’VE HONESTLY GOT ME THROUGH SO MUCH” and she was listening so intently and she smiled at me and hugged me and we held hands for a few seconds which was BEAUTIFUL and she was like “you are SO beautiful like SO beautiful and you are SO funny like you’re posts are hilarious” and I started shaking and I told her she was like a big sister to me and then we got a really cute huggy picture and then we got one with my mom which was cute and THEN (THIS WAS THE FUNNIEST MOMENT) the camera guy said to my mom “do you want a pic alone with her” and my mom was like “oh it’s okay I’m just her mom” and TAYLOR WAS LIKE" OH WELL THANKS" IT WAS SO FUNNY. THEN I told her I loved her and she was like I LOVE YOU BUDDY and I gave her one final hug before I left which was MAGICAL (I swear we hugged about 27468273 times).

As soon as I left the room, I BURST INTO TEARS I COULDN’T BELIEVE I HAD JUST MET MY IDOL AFTER LIKE 6 YEARS OF LOVING HER AND FANGIRLING OVER HER. My mom went to talk to mama swift and she said to her “thank you so much for making a beautiful, amazing role model for my daughter” and mama swift was like AWWW THANK YOU SO MUCH THEN MY MOM GAVE HER A HUG AND THEN I GAVE HER A HUGE HUG AND MAMA SWIFT WAS LIKE THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING HER AND DOING THE CRAZY THINGS SHE MAKES YOU DO AND I CRIED MORE.

WE THEN WENT TO GET OUR MERCH AND GET ON THE BUS AND I WAS GENUINELY STARSTRUCK AND ME AND EMMA JUST KEPT LOOKING AT EACH OTHER AND BEING LIKE DID THAT REALLY JUST HAPPEN?!?!?!

Taylor,
Thank you so so so much for inviting me to your London Secret Session - it was an HONOR to be there. I can’t believe I was given such a beautiful, amazing opportunity and I meant everything I said to you in there and it truly came from the heart. I love you so much and I can’t wait to hopefully see you on tour. You mean the world to me and I can’t wait to hear reputation again and DIE ANOTHER MILLION DEATHS.
I love you so much girl.

Abbie x @taylorswift

me being (very) brutally honest with the signs

Aries- You’re such a goddamn hothead all the goddamn time. Not everyone likes to be constantly doing something every second of every day. You get angry with people for the smallest and most trivial reasons but god forbid someone take a dig at you. You’re such a hypocrite and it’s annoying as fuck. You act like an edgy teenager that’s constantly throwing a tantrum. You also boss people around and expect everyone to just follow your lead and if they don’t, you get pissed at them for having a mind of their own. You seriously need to take a look at your life and stop seeing everything as a fucking challenge that’s rigged against you. My god, I get tired just being in your presence. 

Taurus- You’re a lazy fuck and way too materialistic and possessive. You literally have no desire to do anything because you love to sit on your ass. You take “treat yourself” to a whole new level and not in a healthy way whatsoever. It seems like every chance you get you cause arguments and then you contradict whatever the other person is saying just because you can’t look at anything from a different point of view. Even if you get to the point where you realize you’re in the wrong and the other person is right, you’ll just continue to argue for the sake of arguing and god forbid your ego take even the slightest blow. It’s irritating as shit like you really think you know best when in reality you’re just a stubborn bitch. What a bore.

Gemini- Look, I know you guys get a lot of flak. But take this into consideration…… it’s because most if not all of it is FUCKING TRUE. You have so many different personalities I don’t know which one is even real. You gossip 24/7 and flip-flop between who you talk to and who you talk about. You’re completely unreliable and unpredictable and also clingy as fuck. Seriously, I feel like I can’t get away from you. I just want to go to the bathroom, I don’t need to hear the story right now about how Sarah said that Dylan said that Kimberly found a sock in the dryer that wasn’t hers. Literally no one cares. Another thing that you do is once you get tired of someone, you just throw them away like garbage. (Also Trump is a gemini, and I know you guys can’t control that but like come on. Of course he’s a gemini.)

Cancer- You really need to stop being so whiny or I’m actually going to lose it. Everyone has problems so stop acting like such a victim all the goddamn time. You’re so moody all the time and you act like a small child that needs to have their diaper changed. You also cling onto people as soon as you meet them and cry if someone doesn’t answer your text within 5 fucking minutes. Don’t you have your own life to live? Oh wait, I forgot you spend every second in a dark room and refuse to come outside unless it’s to answer the door because you ordered shitty takeout. You consider changing your clothes adventurous and honestly it’s so boring. Introverted doesn’t even describe you, you’re more like a complete hermit (CRAB. HA!)

Leo- Hey leo, wow, are you actually reading this? I’m kind of shocked because I never thought you’d ever stop looking at yourself in the mirror. Seriously, you’re probably the most vain sign out of all of us. So much so that if someone criticizes you in even the smallest way, you get so offended and act like you’ve been shot in the chest. You think so highly of yourself, and while it’s great to have confidence, you take it to the next level, which is extreme arrogance. You love to have the conversation focused around you. You’re the type of friend that if someone is telling you about their problem or just their day in general, you’ll interrupt them and start talking about yourself and it’s DAMN ANNOYING. How do you still have friends?

Virgo- I’m gonna tell you right now, you’re not as perfect as you think you are. You’re so quick to critique other people that you write them off as not good enough before even getting to know them. You’re the type of person that would tell their friend that they were breathing too loudly. For fucks sake, you’re such an over analyzing pedant it makes me want to slap you in the face with my fucking asymmetrical hand. Your pessimism is damn near blinding, I probably wouldn’t want to hang around you for more than 10 minutes or you’d make me feel self conscious about how I fucking walk or some shit. You can’t take or make a joke. You’re skeptical about everything and you’re completely inflexible. You like to think of yourself as an intellectual but really you’re stuck up, narrow minded and someone I constantly find myself rolling my eyes at.

Libra- You are manipulative as shit. You’ll tell someone they look good without even looking up from your phone. You lie all the time and don’t really give a fuck if you hurt other people’s feelings because you really only look out for yourself. You’re also a huge fucking coward. When your friends need you to have their back and actually be there for them, you run and hide and say, “Oh sorry I just didn’t want to get involved!”. What a lame fucking excuse for ditching your friend in their time of need. You’re also extremely indecisive to the point where it’ll take you 3 hours just to choose where you want to go eat. It’s tiring as fuck. Just MAKE A CHOICE FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE. Have your own fucking opinion. You’re like a goddamn sheep.

Scorpio- Why the FUCK are you so aggressive for no fucking reason? You manipulate people just for the fun of it. You get jealous so easily and usually you don’t even have a reason to be jealous. You just are. It’s pathetic. You like to think that you’re so cool and mysterious but in reality people just see you as a moody and brooding asshole that no one really wants to bother getting to know. I mean, why would they? What’s the point? Every time someone even tries to get close to you, you completely brush them off and act like you don’t care about them because keeping your “mystifying” aura is soo important to you. And if you do let someone in, you treat them like they’re your possession and it’s creepy as hell. You obsess over them and you want to control them. God forbid they hang out with someone that isn’t you and then you resent them for no goddamn reason other than having a life of their own. Do me a favor scorpio and don’t talk to me.

Sagittarius- Honestly if a sag is reading this, you’re just straight up getting a taste of your own medicine. You’re tactless as shit and it makes me not want to be around you, ever. You’re inconsiderate of others and impatient with everyone. If someone isn’t moving up to your standards you will become agitated and aggressive and then you take it out on the person. You constantly need to be doing something else because your attention span lasts about 2 fucking seconds. You act like an 8 year old. You’re also really superficial. You don’t bother getting to know the deeper layers of a person because, like I said, you’re impatient and also just plain lazy. You take people for granted and are careless when handling the feelings of people closest to you. You’re also a really self-obsessed know-it-all. Go climb a fucking tree, sag.

Capricorn- Four words. Lighten. The fuck. Up. You are by far the most power-hungry of all the signs. You take everything so completely seriously that I don’t even know if you understand what “fun” even is. You always have to have two feet on the ground at all times and you can never ever be spontaneous and it’s so fucking dull. You’re conservative and disdainful nature can be so overbearing at times that even your friends need to get away from you. That is, if you have friends. You’re a complete pessimist so who knows if anyone can actually tolerate that. You constantly have to be the most successful person in a room, and you make sure you reach this level of success through abusive and controlling behavior towards the people around you. Your selfishness grosses me out.

Aquarius- I asked you what time it was. I didn’t ask you if I was afraid of time passing or the fact that it’s a manmade construct. For fucks sake, just shut the fuck up about this deep shit for once. I don’t want to contemplate how large the universe really is at fuckin 8:30 am on a Monday. You’re rebellious even when it doesn’t matter and honestly all it does is piss people off. You’re constantly trying to deviate from the norm that you make the same fucking mistakes that other people already made, but you don’t fucking learn from other people’s mistakes because you always have to go your own way. Maybe listen to other people for once? You’re the most detached sign out of all of them and you hurt people by acting aloof all the fucking time but you don’t care because you chalk it up to “this is who I am!!! I need my freedom!!!!”. You need to actually think about how your actions affect people you care about because if you don’t, you’re REALLY gonna end up alone and you won’t be able to do a damn thing about it. 

Pisces- You need to stop feeling sorry for yourself all the time and get it through your head that you’re not always the damn victim. You don’t take responsibility for your actions and you always find a way to blame it on someone else because you’re NEVER in the wrong, are you? Poor little pisces. You’re not as innocent as you want everyone to believe. You’re constantly daydreaming and it becomes really annoying when I’m trying to talk to you and you just completely zone out because you love living in your little imaginary world. You’re the WORST at solving your own problems and conflicts because instead of dealing with them you just avoid it all together and end up leaving the mess for someone else to clean up. You’re really nosy- you love to get in other people’s business. But you don’t go to the person directly, you have to be sneaky about it and gather rumors from other people. You’re also very over-sensitive. Out of all the signs, you’re by far the most likely to respond to this post saying how this isn’t true and that I’m just a “big fat meany!!!” and then add a bunch of angry/crying emojis.


(disclaimer: Don’t worry, I don’t really hate your sign (unless you’re a  * * * * * * … lmao). This was just for fun and I know it’s harsh. Don’t take it too personally. You’re an individual and ultimately you determine who you really are. Except for you, * * * * * * . Fuck you.) 

Dead Fandoms, Part 3

Read Part One of Dead Fandoms here. 

Read Part Two of Dead Fandoms here. 

Before we continue, I want to add the usual caveat that I actually don’t want to be right about these fandoms being dead. I like enthusiasm and energy and it’s a shame to see it vanish.


Mists of Avalon

Remember that period of time of about 15 years, where absolutely everybody read this book and was obsessed with it? It could not have been bigger, and the fandom was Anne Rice huge, overlapping for several years with USENET and the early World Wide Web…but it’s since petered out. 

Mists of Avalon’s popularity may be due to the most excellent case of hitting a demographic sweet spot ever. The book was a feminist retelling of the Arthurian Mythos where Morgan Le Fay is the main character, a pagan from matriarchal goddess religions who is fighting against encroaching Christianity and patriarchal forms of society coming in with it. Also, it made Lancelot bisexual and his conflict is how torn he is about his attraction to both Arthur and Guinevere.

Remember, this novel came out in 1983 – talk about being ahead of your time! If it came out today, the reaction from a certain corner would be something like “it is with a heavy heart that I inform you that tumblr is at it again.”

Man, demographically speaking, that’s called “nailing it.” It used to be one of the favorite books of the kind of person who’s bookshelf is dominated by fantasy novels about outspoken, fiery-tongued redheaded women, who dream of someday moving to Scotland, who love Enya music and Kate Bush, who sell homemade needlepoint stuff on etsy, who consider their religious beliefs neo-pagan or wicca, and who have like 15 cats, three of which are named Isis, Hypatia, and Morrigan.

This type of person is still with us, so why did this novel fade in popularity? There’s actually a single hideous reason: after her death around 2001, facts came out that Marion Zimmer Bradley abused her daughters sexually. Even when she was alive, she was known for defending and enabling a known child abuser, her husband, Walter Breen. To say people see your work differently after something like this is an understatement – especially if your identity is built around being a progressive and feminist author.


Robotech

I try to break up my sections on dead fandoms into three parts: first, I explain the property, then explain why it found a devoted audience, and finally, I explain why that fan devotion and community went away. Well, in the case of Robotech, I can do all three with a single sentence: it was the first boy pilot/giant robot Japanimation series that shot for an older, teenage audience to be widely released in the West. Robotech found an audience when it was the only true anime to be widely available, and lost it when became just another import anime show. In the days of Crunchyroll, it’s really hard to explain what made Robotech so special, because it means describing a different world.

Try to imagine what it was like in 1986 for Japanime fans: there were barely any video imports, and if you wanted a series, you usually had to trade tapes at your local basement club (they were so precious they couldn’t even be sold, only traded). If you were lucky, you were given a script to translate what you were watching. Robotech though, was on every day, usually after school. You want an action figure? Well, you could buy a Robotech Valkyrie or a Minmei figure at your local corner FAO Schwartz. 

However, the very strategy that led to it getting syndicated is the very reason it was later vilified by the purists who emerged when anime became a widespread cultural force: strictly speaking, there actually is no show called “Robotech.” Since Japanese shows tend to be short run, say, 50-60 episodes, it fell well under the 80-100 episode mark needed for syndication in the US. The producer of Harmony Gold, Carl Macek, had a solution: he’d cut three unrelated but similar looking series together into one, called “Robotech.” The shows looked very similar, had similar love triangles, used similar tropes, and even had little references to each other, so the fit was natural. It led to Robotech becoming a weekday afternoon staple with a strong fandom who called themselves “Protoculture Addicts.” There were conventions entirely devoted to Robotech. The supposed shower scene where Minmei was bare-breasted was the barely whispered stuff of pervert legend in pre-internet days. And the tie in novels, written with the entirely western/Harmony Gold conception of the series and which continued the story, were actually surprisingly readable.

The final nail in the coffin of Robotech fandom was the rise of Sailor Moon, Toonami, Dragonball, and yes, Pokemon (like MC Hammer’s role in popularizing hip hop, Pokemon is often written out of its role in creating an audience for the next wave of cartoon imports out of insecurity). Anime popularity in the West can be defined as not a continuing unbroken chain like scifi book fandom is, but as an unrelated series of waves, like multiple ancient ruins buried on top of each other (Robotech was the vanguard of the third wave, as Anime historians reckon); Robotech’s wave was subsumed by the next, which had different priorities and different “core texts.” Pikachu did what the Zentraedi and Invid couldn’t do: they destroyed the SDF-1.


Legion of Super-Heroes

Legion of Superheroes was comic set in the distant future that combined superheroes with space opera, with a visual aesthetic that can best be described as “Star Trek: the Motion Picture, if it was set in a disco.” 

I’ve heard wrestling described as “a soap opera for men.” If that’s the case, then Legion of Super-Heroes was a soap opera for nerds. The book is about attractive 20-somethings who seem to hook up all the time. As a result, it had a large female fanbase, which, I cannot stress enough, is incredibly unusual for this era in comics history. And if you have female fans, you get a lot of shipping and slashfic, and lots of speculation over which of the boy characters in the series is gay. The fanon answer is Element Lad, because he wore magenta-pink and never had a girlfriend. (Can’t argue with bulletproof logic like that.) In other words, it was a 1970s-80s fandom that felt much more “modern” than the more right-brained, bloodless, often anal scifi fandoms that existed around the same time, where letters pages were just nitpicking science errors by model train and elevator enthusiasts.

Legion Headquarters seemed to be a rabbit fuck den built around a supercomputer and Danger Room. Cosmic Boy dressed like Tim Curry in Rocky Horror. There’s one member, Duo Damsel, who can turn into two people, a power that, in the words of Legion writer Jim Shooter, was “useful for weird sex…and not much else.”

LSH was popular because the fans were insanely horny. This is, beyond the shadow of a doubt, the thirstiest fandom of all time.  You might think I’m overselling this, but I really think that’s an under-analyzed part of how some kinds of fiction build a devoted fanbase.  

For example, a big reason for the success of Mass Effect is that everyone has a favorite girl or boy, and you have the option to romance them. Likewise, everyone who was a fan of Legion remembers having a crush. Sardonic Ultra Boy for some reason was a favorite among gay male nerds (aka the Robert Conrad Effect). Tall, blonde, amazonian telepath Saturn Girl, maybe the first female team leader in comics history, is for the guys with backbone who prefer Veronica over Betty. Shrinking Violet was a cute Audrey Hepburn type. And don’t forget Shadow Lass, who was a blue skinned alien babe with pointed ears and is heavily implied to have an accent (she was Aayla Secura before Aayla Secura was Aayla Secura). Light Lass was commonly believed to be “coded lesbian” because of a short haircut and her relationships with men didn’t work out. The point is, it’s one thing to read about the adventures of a superteam, and it implies a totally different level of mental and emotional involvement to read the adventures of your imaginary girlfriend/boyfriend.  

Now, I should point out that of all the fandoms I’ve examined here, LSH was maybe the smallest. Legion was never a top seller, but it was a favorite of the most devoted of fans who kept it alive all through the seventies and eighties with an energy and intensity disproportionate to their actual numbers. My gosh, were LSH fans devoted! Interlac and Legion Outpost were two Legion fanzines that are some of the most famous fanzines in comics history.

If nerd culture fandoms were drugs, Star Wars would be alcohol, Doctor Who would be weed, but Legion of Super-Heroes would be injecting heroin directly into your eyeballs. Maybe it is because the Legionnaires were nerdy, too: they played Dungeons and Dragons in their off time (an escape, no doubt, from their humdrum, mundane lives as galaxy-rescuing superheroes). There were sometimes call outs to Monty Python. Basically, the whole thing had a feel like the dorkily earnest skits or filk-singing at a con. Legion felt like it’s own fan series, guest starring Patton Oswalt and Felicia Day.

It helped that the boundary between fandom and professional was incredibly porous. For instance, pro-artist Dave Cockrum did covers for Legion fanzines. Former Legion APA members Todd and Mary Biernbaum got a chance to actually write Legion, where, with the gusto of former slashfic writers given the keys to canon, their major contribution was a subplot that explicitly made Element Lad gay. Mike Grell, a professional artist who got paid to work on the series, did vaguely porno-ish fan art. Again, it’s hard to tell where the pros started and the fandom ended; the inmates were running the asylum.

Mostly, Legion earned this devotion because it could reward it in a way no other comic could. Because Legion was not a wide market comic but was bought by a core audience, after a point, there were no self-contained one-and-done Legion stories. In fact, there weren’t even really arcs as we know it, which is why Legion always has problems getting reprinted in trade form. Legion was plotted like a daytime soap opera: there were always five different stories going on in every issue, and a comic involved cutting between them. Sure, like daytime soap operas, there’s never a beginning, just endless middles, so it was totally impossible for a newbie to jump on board…but soap operas know what they are doing: long term storytelling rewards a long term reader.

This brings me to today, where Legion is no longer being published by DC. There is no discussion about a movie or TV revival. This is amazing. Comics are a world where the tiniest nerd groups get pandered to: Micronauts, Weirdworld, Seeker 3000, and Rom have had revival series, for pete’s sake. It’s incredible there’s no discussion of a film or TV treatment, either; friggin Cyborg from New Teen Titans is getting a solo movie. 

Why did Legion stop being such a big deal? Where did the fandom that supported it dissolve to? One word: X-Men. Legion was incredibly ahead of its time. In the 60s and 70s, there were barely any “fan” comics, since superhero comics were like animation is today: mostly aimed at kids, with a minority of discerning adult/teen fans, and it was success among kids, not fans, that led to something being a top seller (hence, “fan favorites” in the 1970s, as surprising as it is to us today, often did not get a lot of work, like Don MacGregor or Barry Smith). But as newsstands started to push comics out, the fan audience started to get bigger and more important…everyone else started to catch up to the things that made Legion unique: most comics started to have attractive people who paired up into couples and/or love triangles, and featured extremely byzantine long term storytelling. If Legion of Super-Heroes is going to be remembered for anything, it’s for being the smaller scale “John the Baptist” to the phenomenon of X-Men, the ultimate “fan” comic.

The other thing that killed Legion, apart from Marvel’s Merry Mutants, that is, was the r-word: reboots. A reboot only works for some properties, but not others. You reboot something when you want to find something for a mass audience to respond to, like with Zorro, Batman, or Godzilla.

Legion, though, was not a comic for everybody, it was a fanboy/girl comic beloved by a niche who read it for continuing stories and minutiae (and to jack off, and in some cases, jill off). Rebooting a comic like that is a bad idea. You do not reboot something where the main way you engage with the property, the greatest strength, is the accumulated lore and history. Rebooting a property like that means losing the reason people like it, and unless it’s something with a wide audience, you only lose fans and won’t get anything in return for it. So for something like Legion (small fandom obsessed with long form plots and details, but unlike Trek, no name recognition) a reboot is the ultimate Achilles heel that shatters everything, a self-destruct button they kept hitting over and over and over until there was nothing at all left.


E. E. Smith’s Lensman Novels

The Lensman series is like Gil Evans’s jazz: it’s your grandparents’ favorite thing that you’ve never heard of. 

I mean, have you ever wondered exactly what scifi fandom talked about before the rise of the major core texts and cultural objects (Star Trek, Asimov, etc)? Well, it was this. Lensmen was the subject of fanfiction mailed in manilla envelopes during the 30s, 40s, and 50s (some of which are still around). If you’re from Boston, you might recognize that the two biggest and oldest scifi cons there going back to the 1940s, Boskone (Boscon, get it?) and Arisia, are references to the Lensman series. This series not only created space opera as we know it, but contributed two of the biggest visuals in scifi, the interstellar police drawn from different alien species, and space marines in power armor.

My favorite sign of how big this series was and how fans responded to it, was a great wedding held at Worldcon that duplicated Kimball Kinnison and Clarissa’s wedding on Klovia. This is adorable:

The basic story is pure good vs. evil: galactic civilization faces a crime and piracy wave of unprecedented proportions from technologically advanced pirates (the memory of Prohibition, where criminals had superior firearms and faster cars than the cops, was strong by the mid-1930s). A young officer, Kimball Kinnison (who speaks in a Stan Lee esque style of dialogue known as “mid-century American wiseass”), graduates the academy and is granted a Lens, an object from an ancient mystery civilization, who’s true purpose is unknown.

Lensman Kinnison discovers that the “crime wave” is actually a hostile invasion and assault by a totally alien culture that is based on hierarchy, intolerant of failure, and at the highest level, is ruled by horrifying nightmare things that breathe freezing poison gases. Along the way, he picks up allies, like van Buskirk, a variant human space marine from a heavy gravity planet who can do a standing jump of 20 feet in full space armor, Worsel, a telepathic dragon warrior scientist with the technical improvisation skills of MacGyver (who reads like the most sadistically minmaxed munchkinized RPG character of all time), and Nandreck, a psychologist from a Pluto-like planet of selfish cowards.

The scale of the conflict starts small, just skirmishes with pirates, but explodes to near apocalyptic dimensions. This series has space battles with millions of starships emerging from hyperspacial tubes to attack the ultragood Arisians, homeworld of the first intelligent race in the cosmos. By the end of the fourth book, there are mind battles where the reflected and parried mental beams leave hundreds of innocent bystanders dead. In the meantime we get evil Black Lensmen, the Hell Hole in Space, and superweapons like the Negasphere and the Sunbeam, where an entire solar system was turned into a vacuum tube.

It’s not hard to understand why Lensmen faded in importance. While the alien Lensmen had lively psychologies, Lensman Kimball Kinnison was not an interesting person, and that’s a problem when scifi starts to become more about characterization. The Lensman books, with their love of police and their sexism (it is an explicit plot point that the Lens is incompatible with female minds – in canon there are no female Lensmen) led to it being judged harshly by the New Wave writers of the 1960s, who viewed it all as borderline fascist military-scifi establishment hokum, and the reputation of the series never recovered from the spirit of that decade.


Prisoner of Zenda

Prisoner of Zenda is a novel about a roguish con-man who visits a postage-stamp, charmingly picturesque Central European kingdom with storybook castles, where he finds he looks just like the local king and is forced to pose as him in palace intrigues. It’s a swashbuckling story about mistaken identity, swordfighting, and intrigue, one part swashbuckler and one part dark political thriller.

The popularity of this book predates organized fandom as we know it, so I wonder if “fandom” is even the right word to use. All the same, it inspired fanatical dedication from readers. There was such a popular hunger for it that an entire library could be filled with nothing but rip-offs of Prisoner of Zenda. If you have a favorite writer who was active between 1900-1950, I guarantee he probably wrote at least one Prisoner of Zenda rip-off (which is nearly always the least-read book in his oeuvre). The only novel in the 20th Century that inspired more imitators was Sherlock Holmes. Robert Heinlein and Edmond “Planet Smasher” Hamilton wrote scifi updates of Prisoner of Zenda. Doctor Who lifted the plot wholesale for the Tom Baker era episode, “Androids of Tara,” Futurama did this exact plot too, and even Marvel Comics has its own copy of Ruritania, Doctor Doom’s Kingdom of Latveria. Even as late as the 1980s, every kids’ cartoon did a “Prisoner of Zenda” episode, one of the stock plots alongside “everyone gets hit by a shrink ray” and the Christmas Carol episode.

Prisoner of Zenda imitators were so numerous, that they even have their own Library of Congress sub-heading, of “Ruritanian Romance.” 

One major reason that Prisoner of Zenda fandom died off is that, between World War I and World War II, there was a brutal lack of sympathy for anything that seemed slightly German, and it seems the incredibly Central European Prisoner of Zenda was a casualty of this. Far and away, the largest immigrant group in the United States through the entire 19th Century were Germans, who were more numerous than Irish or Italians. There were entire cities in the Midwest that were two-thirds German-born or German-descent, who met in Biergartens and German community centers that now no longer exist.

Kurt Vonnegut wrote a lot about how the German-American world he grew up in vanished because of the prejudice of the World Wars, and that disappearance was so extensive that it was retroactive, like someone did a DC comic-style continuity reboot where it all never happened: Germans, despite being the largest immigrant group in US history, are left out of the immigrant story. The “Little Bohemias” and “Little Berlins” that were once everywhere no longer exist. There is no holiday dedicated to people of German ancestry in the US, the way the Irish have St. Patrick’s Day or Italians have Columbus Day (there is Von Steuben’s Day, dedicated to a general who fought with George Washington, but it’s a strictly Midwest thing most people outside the region have never heard of, like Sweetest Day). If you’re reading this and you’re an academic, and you’re not sure what to do your dissertation on, try writing about the German-American immigrant world of the 19th and 20th Centuries, because it’s a criminally under-researched topic.


A. Merritt

Pop quiz: who was the most popular and influential fantasy author during the 1930s and 40s? 

If you answered Tolkien or Robert E. Howard, you’re wrong - it was actually Abraham Merritt. He was the most popular writer of his age of the kind of fiction he did, and he’s since been mostly forgotten. Gary Gygax, creator of Dungeons and Dragons, has said that A. Merritt was his favorite fantasy and horror novelist.

Why did A. Merritt and his fandom go away, when at one point, he was THE fantasy author? Well, obviously one big answer was the 1960s counterculture, which brought different writers like Tolkien and Lovecraft to the forefront (by modern standards Lovecraft isn’t a fantasy author, but he was produced by the same early century genre-fluid effluvium that produced Merritt and the rest). The other answer is that A. Merritt was so totally a product of the weird occult speculation of his age that it’s hard to even imagine him clicking with audiences in other eras. His work is based on fringe weirdness that appealed to early 20th Century spiritualism and made sense at the time: reincarnation, racial memory, an obsession with lost race stories and the stone age, and weirdness like the 1920s belief that the Polar Arctic is the ancestral home of the Caucasian race. In other words, it’s impossible to explain Merritt without a ton of sentences that start with “well, people in the 1920s thought that…” That’s not a good sign when it comes to his universality. 


That’s it for now. Do you have any suggestions on a dead fandom, or do you keep one of these “dead” fandoms alive in your heart?

BTS’ Erogenous Zones/How To Turn Them On (Based on Astrology)

✨ An erogenous zone is an area of the body with heightened sensitivity, that can cause arousal when stimulated. Sun, moon, mars, and venus signs can all be taken in account when trying to figure out someone’s sweet spots. Let’s look into BTS’ charts to figure out what really makes them tick ✨

{warning: long post, many gifs and pictures, mature content, and large amounts of bts body worship ahead}

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things i love about this music video (and im probably missing a lot of things feel free to add more)

  • The graveyard forms the letters   TS
  • How when she says “tilted stage” she doesn’t tilt the gravestone on her side she just makes sure its fair again
  • Her grave turns into the marble bathtub she talked about at the grammy museum before performing blank space
  • The single dollar
  • Her SNAKES ARE HER SLAVES like the media says she is treating her friends and family
  • She gets into a fucking car accident then poses for paps???? WITH HER GRAMMY TOO
  • How she got locked in a cage???? But still looked fucking fierce
  • But also about that cage, she got the keys back and is taking control of her reputation again by having her own feast
  • HER ORANGE OUTFIT IS EVERYTHING
  • The cats everywhere???? It doesn’t add much but its taylor swift so shell find a way to add cats somehow no matter what
  • She’s FUCKING ROBBING A STREAMING SERVICE WHILE WEARING A CAT SHIRT
  • Oh yea, shes poking fun at everyone calling her greedy when she took her music off streaming services
  • HOW SHE TEACHES HER “SQUAD” HOW TO ACT THAT’S HOW THE MEDIA PORTAYS IT. Btw, taylor never used the word squad ever to describe her friends
  • THE NUMBER 13!!!!!!!
  • HER “SQUAD” ARE MANEQUINS
  • HOW SHE KILLED HER SQUAD ????
  • HTHE MANSION AGAIN, WHERE SHE COLLECTS MEN
  • FORCING THEM TO WEAR I LOVE TS SHIRTS LIKE PEOPLE THINK SHE FORCED TOM TO DO
  • Her old selves trying to reach to her??? But shes over it???
  • Shes also saying her old selves are the actresses playing in people’s bad dreams
  • SHE KICKS YOU BELONG WITH ME TAYLOR WITH HER HEEL????
  • HOW ALL HER OLD SELVES ARE FALLING TO THEIR DEATHS
  • ( I hope she didn’t destroy the sparkly guitar that thing is a gem)
  • THE CHOREGRAPHY
  • SHE LOOKS SO HOT
  • HER CURLS
  • I LOVE HER CURLS SO MUCH
  • THE PLANE AKA “HOW SHE JETSETS AROUND THE WORLD” THE BLANK SPACE CHARACTER
  • THE ENDING SCENE KILLED ME
  • HER OLD SELVES
  • I WONDER HOW MUCH FUN SHE HAD DRESSING AS HER OLD SELVES AGAIN
  • THE SASS
  • POKING FUN OF HER OWN INSULTS
  • THAT ONE VERSION OF HER WITH SNAKES ADSAGDASHDSA I LOVE HER
  • SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Imagine Jack spilling to you what Dean thinks, and practically feels, of you when he reads his mind.

“Wait, wait, wait, wait.” Dean raised a hand, stopping Jack from drinking his beer “How old do you think you are?” he asked, mouth half full as you and Sam shared a look.

“Uh 3 days, 17 hours and 42 minutes.” Jack replied precisely to the question and seeing the look on Dean’s face almost made you choke on your own drink. It was priceless to say the least. Barely at four days old and the young man had already outsassed the older Winchester, well this was going to be fun. Dean just shook his head and took a sip of his beer, Jack watching closely and doing the same at the exact almost moment.

“So-” Jack cleared his throat, looking at you “You are my aunt, right?”

“Uh well-” you smiled “Was, actually. I’m no longer an angel, I fell and after building a vessel things happened and… there is no angel mojo in me anymore. So I am practically human.”

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Free The Animal

Word Count: 6k

Genre: Smut, Angst (will I ever stop being emo?)

Author’s Note: You ever forget that you’re a fanfic writer then you write a fic so bad you remember how much of a hack you are? Yeah welcome to my fic :’D

dom!jungkook- fuckboi!jungkook- fuckbuddy relationship- dirty talk- thigh riding mention because damn even I am not immune to his thighs- inspired by Sia’s song and part of the song drabble game. You can find links to the rest of them on my masterlist

Loving You To Death (Sequel)

There he was with his hands up some girl’s skirt, grinding on her like he was trying to fuck her through their clothes, the fucking pig. You huff and turn to your friend who gives you an exasperated look, “___, just go and grab him by the dick and tell him he can’t fucking do that.”

“He can do whatever the fuck he wants to do, even if that is a bleach blonde bitch with a tan that makes her look like an Oompa Loompa.” That was pretty low, you admit. It wasn’t the girl’s fault that Jungkook had chosen her for the night. But seriously, there was a limit to tanning, this was just harmful to the eyes.

“No, he can’t because you’re together.” Your friend, Hwasa, sounds pretty fed up with you.

“No, we’re not. We’re just fuck buddies and we agreed that we’re not exclusive right from the start.” Why wasn’t she understanding this? You’d explained it to her a thousand times.

“I don’t care what bullshit you told each other. All I care about is what I see, and that is two idiots constantly doing all they can to piss each other off because they can’t communicate like adults.”

“What are you even talking about? Jungkook is not trying to piss me off. He’s just being himself. Which is admittedly annoying in and of itself but you know…”

“Then why did he do nothing the past three days but play video games while you were off galavanting with Jin, only to start making out with some girl the minute you make an appearance?”

“He did?” You asked surprised, only to check yourself back and shrug it off. “I don’t know, he must have just not felt like it.”

“Oh my god, save me from these two idiots.” Hwasa cries then takes you by the shoulder and starts shaking you, “He’s fucking jealous because you took Jin to meet your family and not him so he’s trying to piss you off. Why? Because he likes you. And you’re pissed off. Why? Because you like him. Now can you get that through your thick skull or do I have to beat it into you?”

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[Article] BTS Is Back! The K-Pop Kings Talk Their New Album and Ever-Evolving Style

Just ahead of the release, the members sat down for an exclusive interview with Vogue to break down their new look and evolving personal style. Despite a long day of filming and dance rehearsals, they were in good spirits, laughing and chattering happily. “Let’s go!” J-Hope said. Here, we do.

Q. Tell us about the new visual concept for this album. What kind of style did you pick to express it?

Suga: It’s about boys falling in love. There are four versions of love, and we shot four different photos to show them. Though each one is different, the same feeling of love comes through in every shot. There’s a sense of playfulness, of friends hanging out comfortably at home in their free time, and that kind of fluttering feeling. Visually, we cover a lot of ground.

The lyrics and the music themselves are about finding your fate. In this album, we cover a wide range of songs: There are high-energy ones, very hip-hop ones. It’s quite diverse. To match it, the style covers a range of colorful, sporty, leisure, and boyish clothes. They go well together: powerful music, colorful clothes.

J-Hope: It’s very colorful and sporty, overall. I think there’s a slightly retro feel, too. Among the seven members, I think we each kind of bring out our hidden boyishness through our clothes.

Suga: It’s totally different. When we did You Never Walk Alone, we wore a lot of casual clothes. This time, it’s a lot flashier. Super colorful, yet more high-end and comfortable at the same time. More of that comforting feeling.

J-Hope: Right, this time we wanted to show more of that boyish style.

Q. How would you describe BTS’s style in general, looking back across your work?

Rapmon: Just style.

Jimin: Truthfully, we have a very energetic style, I would say.

Q. A lot has been said about the kind of individuality you hope to express as a band. Is that something that comes into play with your style, letting each member’s own persona come through?

Jimin: Of course; it’s important. With each new album, we do a lot of fittings. And each time we do those fittings, we talk a lot and always share our thoughts as we go. We put a lot of effort into looking for clothes that express ourselves and the feelings we want to express with each album’s concept. We want to show that, [but] without losing our individuality either.

V: I don’t think we have one signature. With each concept, we change it up completely and the styles have been so diverse. For “Boy in Luv,” we wore school uniforms. For “Blood, Sweat & Tears,” it was a range of suits and white shirts. As artists, we have to change our style to match each concept. We’re always changing, ever changing.

Q. Do you have a favorite piece you wore for this comeback?

Suga: I loved all the oversize shirts.

Jungkook: Me too. There’s a loose, navy chiffon shirt I wore with slacks that was particularly light and comfortable. I liked that a lot.

J-Hope: I liked wearing those basketball jerseys, and those ultra-colorful sweaters, too.

Rapmon: There was a really big windbreaker that I liked because it was so big.

V: I liked everything, but the accessories most of all. Particularly all the rings and earrings, I liked those the most.

Jimin: For me, it was the bright red shirt from “DNA.”

Q. Who do you think has changed the most since you debuted?

J-Hope: V?

Suga: V has changed a lot, and Jimin changed a lot.

Rapmon: Jungkook, too.

Q. In what way?

Jimin: We’ve all gotten old.

J-Hope: Our maknae line [the youngest members] has changed a lot. They are the youngest and looked it when we debuted, but now, they look more grown-up.

Jin: Like Jimin. Overall, his face changed from cute to sexy.

Q. What do you want most for this comeback?

Suga: To make the Billboard Hot 100 is my dream.

J-Hope: Let’s get it! Dream!

Rapmon: I would like all the members to be healthy.

J-Hope: Health!

Suga: It’s the most important thing, really.

Jimin: I would like to be 3 centimeters taller.

V: For real. I want to have wide shoulders like Jin.

Jimin: Me too [laughs]. For real.

Suga: If everyone could be happy, I would be happy.

J-Hope: Peace!

Jungkook: For me, I’d like to travel a lot. Anywhere would be great. And if I could learn to speak English and Japanese well, that would be great, too.

J-Hope: I also would like the members to be healthy and happy. And everyone else, all our fans.

Q. Any last words for your American fans?

J-Hope: Of course, American Army.

Suga: No matter what, our American Army is so big, and we are so very thankful to them. From now on, we want to put on even cooler performances, be cooler, be better, so look forward to it. Please, always look forward to it.

V: Thank you! We love American Army so much!

Q. Tell us about your personal style. What are you into lately?

V: In my case, I like to pick one piece that pops against everything else. I like flashy shirts, or I’ll wear a simple shirt with a fancy necktie. I also like vintage pieces, more standout ones. I’ll go to certain boutiques and look for clothes without labels. You can find a lot of nice unbranded shirts, and I wear those a lot.

Jimin: To be honest, I don’t think much about style, or “oh, this is my style,” that sort of thing. I follow my mood, which is so different day to day. Generally, I like a wide range of styles, but lately, I’ve been reaching for comfortable, simple things. Simple slacks and shirts.

Jungkook: Are you familiar with the term paealmot [fashion-know-nothing]? I don’t know anything about fashion. So for me, I reach for anything comfortable. I wear a lot of athleisure and workout clothes—sweatpants and sweatshirts—as I like to stay active.

Jin: I like to dress warmly, comfortably as I go around. Naturally I like easy fashion. My style is clean, polished, and gentle looking. Or you could say I prefer to wear big sweatshirts and hoodies.

J-Hope: I’m into streetwear, and more colorful looks. These days, bags have become more of a thing for me—these mini cross bags are so great.

Suga: These days I’m wearing a lot of Jordans, those sneakers. I’ve been wearing a lot of slippers, too, and comfortable clothes in general. I really like that kind of oversize fit.

Rap Monster: These days, I’m most into staying comfortable. I do have a lot of interest in Japanese brands, so I’ve been looking at cool Japanese hyungs [older brothers] and carefully studying their style. Brands like WTAPS, Visvim, I like a lot.

Q.  What is one item you can’t live without?

V: I like old-school, vintage-style glasses a lot. As for accessories, I really like them all.

Jimin: I like accessories a lot. Hats, caps, beanies, I like all of them. I also look for special standout earrings, rings, necklaces … I like to layer them on heavily.

Jungkook: I don’t like accessories all that much, except for hats. I like bucket hats and beanies a lot, and I sometimes wear rings or bracelets. I’m the kind of person that if I put it on once, I’ll leave it on forever.

Jin: I like silver accessories. I think they suit me well.

J-Hope: I like hats a lot—bucket hats, sun caps, beanies, and fitted caps. And like I said before, I like bags a lot. I like shoes that stand out, too. Lately, I’ve been wearing a lot of running shoes, the kind that look good with very wide pants.

Suga: I also love accessories, especially bracelets and rings. King rings, the really big ones. I’ll wear a lot of them at once.

Rap Monster: I like hats. As for a favorite … I like all of them, though? Really. I wear hats all the time.

Q.  How much interest do you have in fashion?

Jin: “How do I mix and match these things together … ” I tend to stand in front of the closet worrying like that.

Q.  Who is your style icon right now?

V: I don’t have a big role model at the moment, but later on, I would like to channel [actor] Ryoo Seung-bum [who is known for his unique style].

Jimin: I don’t have one exactly, but I like to look on the Internet for cool, well-dressed people and get inspired that way.

Jungkook: I am my own role model. I want to follow myself.

Jin: [Actor] Kang Dong Won. The clothes he wears, it’s the fit and style I like.

J-Hope: I like A$AP Rocky. How to put it … he dresses on-trend, but he also dresses for himself. He’s made his own style. It’s hip, but has a clean, polished kind of feel. That whole A$AP Mob style, I like.

Suga: Like Jungkook, I don’t really have one. I just look for what I like and what I feel comfortable wearing.

Rap Monster: Cool hyungs I look up to, even people I pass on the street in Seoul. People dress so well here, it’s easy to get inspired.

Source

A definitive timeline of Seventeen’s AL1 story

Don’t know why I’m starting this past 9pm when I have school tomorrow but due to an anxious bout (which has lasted for about two months) I’ve learnt that when inspiration hits, I just got to run with it, or should I say bat with it, amirite? (we’ll get to that later on)  LETS BEGIN.

Originally posted by yunchanpai

Firstly we have to understand the vague points of time the music videos have taken place in. At first I thought that from Adore U to Boom Boom, all of the comebacks were on an alternate timeline to don’t wanna cry, however seventeen has stated that we are in fact wrong and that this all in the same timeline.

Adore U’ (is a funky pop song-) shows a crush a boy has on someone, but is inexperienced and marks it down to adoration rather than affection, as to not confront their own feelings. In this we can see an innocent fear of not knowing what to really say to someone and knowing the right words to express what you’re feeling. ‘Mansae’ is a bit different, although the schoolboy concept would have fit the song adore u, the lyrics are a bit different. It’s almost as if the boy has accepted the crush as what it is , liking someone, however instead of confessing they act immature (like schoolboys) and are jealous instead. ‘Pretty U’ is a bit different and shows some development. It has a musical theatre style and shows some development, they’ve actually confessed their feelings. Here’s when things get a bit rocky. ‘Very Nice’ is probably one of the most impactful songs ‘I’ve heard from seventeen. Although the lyrics describe a first date, the music video is a bit different. Whenever one of the boys starts to feel something for the girl, their heart explodes. It’s almost as though they can’t actually handle it . This is later reinforced in ‘Boom Boom’ where they claim that everything is because of the love interest . Up until this point the songs seem pretty normal, light hearted and tells the story of someone’s first romance. Although it seems unrequited and unresponsive, the main character seems happy, even with the the one-sidedness of it all.

You see, this is what makes me suspicious. Back in their seventeen project days, they said quite a few times how they didn’t want to be regular idols and they wanted to be artists instead, ones who worked very closely with the production of the songs and choreography. This is what makes everything seem off to me. We’ll come back to this later on.

After Boom Boom is when I think things get really weird. At this point in time is where Seventeen as a group itself gains momentum and popularity, being put to such a high standard of even getting to be put in ‘EBS’ with Exo and Bts. This almost seems to pressure them even more. It was hard enough coming from a company which didn’t have a lot of money, but now that they were quite popular, it was even harder being able to maintain that. This is when I think chapter 0.5 happens, just before don’t wanna cry. As we’ve seen in the unit songs, this is a side of seventeen we’ve never seen before. 

Although change up is upbeat and catchy, the lyrics seem quite desperate. It’s almost as though the leaders are trying to prove themselves, saying that others wouldn’t understand what they had been doing and how had it is. Change up actually means a pitch in baseball, where the pitcher moves fast but the ball is significantly slower to confuse the batter.Furthermore, in ‘trauma’ the hip hop unit all speak about the mental blocks they’ve had, all one individual room only to realise they’re all facing it together. Lilli Yabbay could actually be symbolic of death as it’s used in funerals for many cultures. In the music video, we can see how the music had brought them to life, but as soon as it ended they were on the floor, much like everyone around.This could refer to people sleeping on the performance unit, or more logically, the fear of having people be dissatisfied or not being able to truly express what they want to say before their fans part with them. 

BEFORE EVERYONE LEAVES THIS POST BECAUSE THEY GET BORED, LEMME JUST SUMMARISE BEFORE THE VOCAL UNIT SONG DROPS.

I feel like this entire time we’ve though about this boy falls in love story as a basic romance and nothing more. The closer you look, maybe it could refer to their dream. Back when they looked adoringly at their favourite singers up on that stage. Back in their school days, holding a trainee title but no guarantees. Pretty U could be when they realised that they knew debut was the only option for them . Aju Nice is their debut, a point of excitement, we can see their change from mansae in the use of their female leads. Before they would get discouraged with the lack of response from the girl (which could be the lack of attention from the public) but when in very nice we can see how they continue to work for her attention and to see some emotion, running towards her at the end even after their metaphorical downfalls. Boom Boom is when they realise that hard work does pay off, but their B-side Fast Pace shows us how they miss the freedom they had before people really knew who they were.

Gonna continue this when I catch wind of the vocal unit. This took me an hour and 11 minutes, gosh I’m slow. Goodnight 

Part One | Part Two coming soon

‘Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to. That’s the only way to become what you were meant to be.’ - (This does not mean what you think it does....)

I haven’t written many original posts recently, but given what has happened today, expect quite a few over the next couple of days.

My first post is about the quote above. I wanted to just let my feelings settle a bit before writing this, but it just happens to be the first thing I noticed.

For those unfamiliar, I wrote a post a couple months ago about Kylo Ren and his motivations. It pretty much sums up what Lucasfilm presented to us in this trailer, as far as where Kylo Ren is, psychologically speaking, at the end of The Force Awakens. I would REALLY recommend reading it in order to understand where I am coming from concerning this post.

http://sakurau121.tumblr.com/post/157962305035/you-know-what-the-really-ironic-thing-is-with-kylo

As many of us suspected, the central theme of ‘The Last Jedi’ seems to be indeed that of finding one’s sense of identity

With the above quote I found myself viewing it in a very different light after watching the trailer a few times.

It’s partially to do with the tone of Kylo’s voice. He’s not angry, not even sad exactly. He almost sounds like he is advising someone. And the language also suggests that, when he talks about ‘what YOU were meant to be’, to me this alludes to the fact that he is either being metaphorical or speaking directly to somebody else.

This is purely my own speculation, but in my mind, he is actually speaking to Rey. This line might have been put in simply for the trailer and doesn’t actually exist in the film, but I think it’s part of a conversation. A conversation while Rey and Kylo are connected through the force? A conversation after Kylo reveals Rey’s past, including what happened to her family? Maybe. These are all possibilities.

But why would I jump to this conclusion? After all, isn’t he simply talking about killing his mother and uncle, after having killed his father?

Originally posted by chatnoirs-baton

Actually, I say no.

And it’s for a very simple, logical reason that has nothing to do with sentimentality (although I, like many of you out there I suspect, did indeed tear up when Kylo’s thumb hovered over that button which, if pushed, would end up killing his mother).

It comes from comparing TFA with this trailer. You have to take into account of what has happened in TFA and how that has changed everyone. I don’t actually think Kylo is repeating himself here, that I believe is misdirect but again I might just be overthinking.

Kylo Ren says in the official trailer for TFA that ‘he will finish what Darth Vader started’.

Originally posted by star-wars-is-life

Throughout Episode VII, Kylo Ren is constantly emulating his grandfather, most likely because he wants to be like him. He cherishes Darth Vader’s crumpled mask like an old relic in a museum and wears his own mask proudly at the beginning of the film.

Now let’s compare that to this trailer. What does he do when he says -

‘Let the past die. Kill it, if you have to. That’s the only way to become what you were meant to be.’ 

What does he do?

Originally posted by boomdafunk

He destroys his mask.

In other words, he destroys his old self. The old self that emulated Darth Vader, that was trying to be like the grandfather and hid behind a mask.

This is incredibly literal as this is what the trailer actually wants you to see. The first interpretation one could logically form. And you see how Kylo Ren is doing a complete u-turn here. He is literally doing the opposite to what he did in the TFA trailer. You miss it perhaps because of the impact of what happens soon after this shot. But this point can be expanded upon, as I did in my previous post above.

Kylo Ren, Ben Solo, whoever he is, is trying to find his sense of identity. But he is no longer satisfied with trying to find it by looking into the past, by looking into his family’s history. This INCLUDES Darth Vader, not just Luke, Leia or Han.

I think he is in fact turning his back on his own lineage. Because he thought it would be enough. He thought that by finding out his grandfather was the powerful Sith Lord Darth Vader, he would be able to answer the question of why he could never find balance within himself.

Instead?

He’s even more lost now than he was before. He knows that the answer no longer lies with Darth Vader.

So how does this connect to his dialogue?

Because this mirrors another character’s trajectory. And I believe he says these words to the said character later in the film, when he realizes his past mistake.

Originally posted by starwarsfilms

Rey.

Why? Because she is still struggling, just as he is, with finding ‘her place in all this’. In other words, finding her sense of identity.

What I think is truly amazing is that somebody else in this sequel trilogy has already said these words before, or at least something to this effect.

Originally posted by bruceewayne

‘The belonging you seek is not behind you, it is ahead.’

Phrased completely differently but when you put that next to -

‘Let the past die. That’s the only way to become what you were meant to be.’

Yes, I know I cut a piece of dialogue out but it’s clear what is happening here, and in fact what is happening throughout this trailer.

Kylo and Rey’s paths are not just similar.

They are one and the same.

This is why people have come away from this trailer questioning whom Snoke is referring to. Because in a way it doesn’t matter. The point Lucasfilm is making here is that ‘Rey and Kylo are two halves-’

And you can finish off the rest of that sentence.

Now back to what I said at the beginning of this post. I think we will find out more of Rey’s past, but my daydreaming self is saying that Kylo warns Rey, just as Maz did, to not let her past completely inform her future. Otherwise, she could end up like him, misguided and lost. When he says ‘kill it if you have to’, this could be on a figurative level or it may allude to Rey’s dark origins (stay turned for that post).

If what he’s saying is basically the same as what Maz recommends to Rey, then what does that say about Kylo? What does that say about the light and dark, if they are essentially saying the same thing? :-)

So what do you guys think? Let me know through comments and reblog and check out for more posts in the coming days. This is such an exciting time to be part of this fandom and I love you all very much! You make the experience a hundred times more moving and fun! I nearly screamed at the end of that trailer and for a minute thought I was genuinely hallucinating. Gobsmacked, speechless, is best way I can describe it.