i have no words for how flawless this man is

By The Park

Sometimes all we need is a friend.
Background Audio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7TbJBYssGOw

Originally posted by marishash

I could barely believe my eyes as I walked over to the hunched figure of my boss, Jacob Frye, looking down with his head hanging down, his top hat next to him to make him company in an empty bench on Lambeth’s park near the Asylum.
“Mister Frye, is everything alright?” I asked.
But I gasped as he looked up and saw dried tears on his usual confident face.
“Tell me,” he shakily said, “what have I done wrong?”

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Mystery Man - Luke

Requested - ““I found your tumblr but you don’t know and urg now you’re posting about your crush on this cute person oh wait is that me” with bff Luke please <3”

———–

“I’d go to the ends of the earth for you with only mild complaining”

You’d reblogged the text post automatically, as you did with every post that made you think of Luke. You never planned on Luke seeing them. You didn’t really speak about your tumblr to anybody, especially not your best friend, who was the reason behind your unrequited love.

#you #its always been you #i hate that I love you so much

You’d tagged the post.

Who?! Luke’s mouth turned into a scowl as he read the tags of all the posts you’d reblogged to do with love and heartbreak. He couldn’t help the jealousy that bubbled up inside him. Partly because he was your best friend and you’d never mentioned liking someone to him, he thought this was something you’d trust him with, but the main reason behind his jealousy was the fact that you seemed to be head over heels with somebody who obviously wasn’t him. After making this discovery on your tumblr, Ashton, Calum and Michael had heard nothing but his whining about this boy he didn’t know, who clearly meant so much to you.

-

“You’ve been friends with her for years, been in love with her from the second you met her, and still haven’t made a move. Are you seriously surprised that she met someone else?!” Calum doesn’t beat around the bush.

“Mate, talk to her” Ash tries a gentler approach, “you never know, you could be the guy!” Luke had scoffed at this, insistent that you were way out of his league.

“She’s so lovely and really hot, why would you think she’d stay single?” Michael had laughed.

-

“Luke? Luke!” You nudge his shoulder, his eyes were unfocused, a scowl etched on his face that had been there the entire night.

“What?” He turns to you.

“What’s with you tonight?” You laugh at him, “you’ve barely paid attention to anything I’ve said all night.”

“Yes, I have. You said that you think Krispy Kreme should deliver and Chris Hemsworth is so perfect that he might actually be a god.” He repeats the thoughts you’d decided to vocalise throughout the evening.

“Well, they should and he is” you nod, “you weren’t talking so I had to fill the silence. You said you wanted to watch The Avengers anyway, and you haven’t even looked at the screen!”

“Just tell me he doesn’t have really big muscles” Luke’s eyes meet yours, as he asks you this confusing question, “and he isn’t really funny or clever or nice, tell me he’s a bit of an idiot.”

“Are you talking about Chris Hemsworth?!” You frown, “Luke, he’s a god. He’s flawless, look at him!”

“No, I mean the guy you like” he mutters, finally looking at the TV screen, so he doesn’t have to look in your eyes when you start to tell him how wonderful this guy was.

“I-you…what?!” You’re lost for words.

“I went on your tumblr..” He admits.

“Wh-why…why would you do that?!”

“Because I was trying to show Cal that vine of the old man falling on the escalator you showed me!” He defends himself.

“Oh god….okay” you desperately try to think of every post you’d ever reblogged that was aimed at Luke, “what did you see?”

“That you like some guy” he mumbles, “who is he? Why haven’t you mentioned him?”

“I-I don’t…I…” You stop as you begin to recognise the expression in Luke’s eyes.

“He sounds like a dick, whoever he is” Luke replies, childishly.

“He is a dick” you shrug, “and he isn’t really muscular, he thinks he’s funny but he’s not, he’s an idiot, he’s too tall, he’s annoying, he’s very clever, although sometimes he says the most stupid things, he’s also very lovely” you pause, as you see Luke’s eyes close, his face looks defeated, “he also goes on my tumblr when he told me he wouldn’t do.” His head shoots up.

“What did you just say?!” He licks his bottom lip.

“Who else would it be, Luke?” You whisper.

“I love you” he swallows, needing you to know that he felt the same way.

“I love you too” you look into his eyes, hoping he knows how much you mean the words.

“No, you don’t understand, I mean that I…” He stammers.

“I’m so ridiculously in love with you, Hemmings” you interrupt him, placing a hand at the back of his neck.

“Yeah, th-that’s what I meant” he laughs, relieved, “well, not the ‘Hemmings’ part, obviou…”

“Stop talking” giggling, you pull his face towards yours until your lips meet.

anonymous asked:

can u go in depth as to why you hate the pjo fandom this like legitimately interests me and i love u

thank u anon

i wont be talking objectively abt the books bc im tired and thats separate. this is fandom only

-theyre mostly 12 (not necessarily bad just. a factor)
-reposting
-the solangelo tag
-garbage repetetive hcs that have no substance or worth bc theyve shown up a million times with slightly different wording
-whitewashing
-PeRcY IS soOoOo SASSY!!!
-XD
-“dark percy balha blah ablag blah bfvjdjd”
-percabeth as a whole, being turned into the most 1D garbage pairings ever
-who is frank?
-hazel as Nice Dormant Girl #1
-piper is So FuCkIbg CoOl LOOK AT HOW FLAWLESS SHE IS!! literally 0 FLAWS FORGET EVRYTHING THAT MAKES HER CHARACTER GOOD!!
-reyna dont need no man
-reynico
-solangelo (again)
-nico: hey will i feel like shit, will: shut the fuck up everyones been thru shit, nico: dam fuk im so happy now!! [intense makeouts]
-caleo garbage
-all da ladies luv leo!!
-caleo is suddenly angry and bitter for no reason. character consistency?? whats that lmfao
-nico is the Quirky Gay Kid
-this is a super personal preference but like. anime styled pjo fffff i literally am not abke to breathe
-annabeth: “wow percy is SoOoo STUPID!!!”
-everyone: look at how STUPID percy is!! HAHAHAHA!!!
-jason very creepily shipping will and nico, who for all intents and purposes, are in the 9th grade
-nico: *blushes*
-jrick, or whatever the fuck jason and the brick are
-simplification of characters to the point where i cant even participate in the fandom bc theres just. nothing there. the pjo golden age was 2011/2012 and unfortunately i was an embarrassing tween (told i was percy jackson sexual by a bully bc i talked abt it so much whfhdjdjdk who the fuck) and unable to fully appreciate burdge and the good hcs and virias music posts and shhfhd its so sad to see it go to shit and its not even 100% at the fault of the ppl in the fandoms its just?? the books got so bad im so disappointed

to my favourite person in the world,

happy birthday! you’re finally 24 years old (25 in korea), but sometimes it seems like you’re still five, 哈哈哈. looking back on the past year, you’ve really gone through a lot - you’ve gone through a whole range of hairstyles and colors, you’ve won so many awards with exo (and have even been named asia’s number one most handsome man yourself 哈哈哈哈), you’ve faced your fears, you’ve finally let yourself shed tears, and you’ve seem to become ever so slightly used to being in front of the camera now 哈哈. you’ve grown and have had more experience as an idol, and i’m very proud of where you are now.

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Y’all.

darlingdiver and I just went to see Jupiter Ascending. We walked out of the theater, into the lobby, and literally bought tickets for the next showing. We’re in a theater that serves alcohol, we’re sitting and drinking and waiting for this masterpiece of human engineering to start again.

I have no words that do justice to this movie. It is so ridiculously bad, it cycles back around to being amazing. It is the most flawless scifi cheese ever crafted by man, this movie is space brie with ackee fruit coulis.

We might go see it a third time, depending in how many Bailey’s milkshakes I drink.

Y’ALL.

Aro/Aces Over Twenty - My Experience

I’m 23, I’m aro/ace.

I’ve been wanting to write this for a long time, I think I finally found the right way to do it. Please contact me with any questions:)

I’m writing this because I really believe things would of been a hell of a lot different for me if I had known of these terms earlier. This is my experience, and I hope somebody else can use it to avoid the mistakes I made. 

Intro

I can remember the exact moment when I should have realized I was aro/ace. I was 15, I had a great boyfriend, who was handsome, objectively attractive, kind, honest, and everything I wanted from a partner. A moment passed between us when it struck me that, I should really be attracted to him, I should be motivated to do something sexually with him. But I don’t feel anything.

[I shrugged off the feeling. We mutually broke up a several months later realizing we were never really anything but “good friends”]

Why it was hard to realize I was aro/ace.

I like sex (in general). I like being close to someone, I like being special to them. I like the way people look at me when they’re attracted to me, want to date me. Any emotional or physical problems I had with sex I figured were natural for a female who wasn’t supposed to like sex anyway, or at least grew up thinking she wasn’t supposed to. I had talked to allosexual female friends who had this same problem. And any problems I had with romantic relationships I chalked it up to the relationship itself–the guy, the situation, he wasn’t doing something or did something too much, etc. I never dug deeper than that, into my internal basic motivations. Until I saw on TV something that I wanted way more than what I was pretending to want.

What changed.

I watched a TV show, starring a man and a woman. The woman was a healthy aromantic bisexual with very low interest in sex (who nonetheless went out and got it when she wanted it without shame). 

I loved this character in a way that made me examine more closely my already confused and tired sexuality. The thing is, I knew at that point what I had been questioning for a long time. I wasn’t straight enough to be heterosexual and wasn’t gay enough to be bisexual. 4 years ago this same question brought me to asexuality blogs, and I found myself re-reading the same things now at the age of 23.

I was highly skeptical of both the asexuality and aromanticism. Asexuality sounded like an excuse for low sex drive and aromanticism just sounded made up. Nonetheless as I kept watching this show I had both terms in my mind. And boy oh boy was my stunning flawless sexually confusing celebrity crush aromantic. She was aromantic in a way that made the term real to me and she had exactly the kind of relationship with her male partner that I had always craved but never knew how to articulate.

Coming Out Aromantic

Aromanticism would have been nice to know about when I was single but I’m in an alloromantic relationship with a man who likes to use the word “love” a lot. The problem is, I just cannot return the sentiment. After owning the term aromantic I take small comfort in the fact that I’m not emotionally damaged, but some days I still feel broken. I like that it’s possible to build strong healthy relationships without love–and that my partner supports this whole-heartedly–but most days I still wish I could just feel whatever it is that gets him so starry eyed. Maybe things would be just a little easier between us. I still haven’t figured it out completely but I now I can move forward without looking for problems in the wrong places. 

Coming Out Asexual 

This was significantly harder. I hated the idea of what the stereotyped-asexual is. There was no denying that I liked sex most of the time. I liked thinking sexual thoughts, they’re fun. I found people hot and liked looking at them. I had male and female celebrity crushes and I took great pleasure in fantasizing about them. It’s only recently I realized I had been over-thinking my sexuality just like I always have. The truth is, I just don’t feel attraction towards people. I just don’t. Especially not towards anyone in real life that I encounter, no matter what the emotional connection. And if I do feel attraction towards a celebrity it’s only because I like them for other reasons and find it easy to use their image as a tool for sexual arousal. 

[Finally realizing the difference between sexual attraction and sexual arousal = HUGE breakthrough for me. I can become physically aroused by sexual images, I am not inherently attracted to anyone.)

Why it’s important for me to ID as aro/ace

Now I know how to frame my relationships without overcomplicating what I’m feeling. That girl at my work who I like more than others–she’s a squish. I mean I personally  hate the term squish….but I know I don’t need to have sexual feelings to be drawn to the way she looks or romantic feelings to love the way she is. And I know that it’s a feeling that only lasts as long as I keep her at a certain distance. And most importantly I know that this way of feeling is natural for me. I’m not making it up to compensate for something else. It’s just the way I’m drawn towards some people and not others, and it’s okay.

Now I know that I want my ideal long term relationship to be a partnership. Not, as I thought before, the Romeo I fell in love with at first sight. But a strong partnership, built on trust, reliability and a desire to move forward together. And if I don’t fall “in love” it doesn’t make that relationship weak. 

Now I know how to approach sex in a way that works for me, without letting my lack of natural attraction or sexual instincts stop me from exploring something I want to explore and share and be apart of. 

I developed squishes without knowing the term, I had boyfriends without knowing I couldn’t fall in love, I had sex without knowing I was asexual, and i doubted, questioned, screamed, tore myself apart, drank myself to sleep pondering the nuances of these things because I knew I wasn’t having normal Romantic or Sexual reactions. In each case whether it was a sexual encounter that left me crying in the bathroom or confusion over a harmless squish I figured that something was really screwed up with me because I felt there was no reason I should be feeling the way I did.

But there was a reason. A pretty obvious and basic reason.

So yes, I could have used the terms asexual and aromantic when I was younger. I needed this identity when I was 15 wondering why I didn’t feel the way I was supposed to towards my casual boyfriend. I would’ve avoided a lot and I mean A LOT of my most significant mistakes. I have developed very unhealthy ideas about relationships and sex that I am still getting over, even though I’m in a healthy relationship now. 

So please please please don’t be afraid to identify with these orientations if you are doubting yourself. You’re not too young. You’re not too inexperienced. And above all its okay to question your identity, and adapt and change your identity as you learn more about yourself.

I went back and forth for a few months wondering if I should submit this anonymously, but I want to be a resource for anyone with questions so please reach out if you have any!