i have no shame nor regrets


I am sorry for all these wasted blood

All those silvers and reds, all bodies that flood

My kingdom, that I ought to protect. And you –

Mare, who had suffered the burden of our fates.


Apologies won’t do so much good, considering all that I have done

Vainly, I started a war in which neither red nor silver won

Each day, I long for nothing but you, Mare, and my deliverance

Notwithstanding the pain I have willingly carved in your heart, I long for you - and your forgiveness.


Can a heartless man get another chance? In another lifetime, I hope,

Another chance to see if goodness can overcome my dark, perilous heart?

Lowly, I bowed my head, as the shames of my life rises in my throat. I need to finish this.

Obediently, I followed the last wish of the beating one which has deceived me for so long. I need to finish this.


Regret will follow my grave. Yes. But, Mare, I believe that even the darkest person deserves to rest.

Eventually, but not now. I understand. Your forgiveness will be with me in the afterlife.

Maven Calore,

House of Calore; House of Merandus

The real traitor prince; The fallen king

“Lies bring me up, lies will bring me down”

Writ this day,

November 28

Day of my Death

 “Close his eyes. Close his eyes, Cal.” I tremble at the sight of the lifeless body in front of me. Tainted in silver. A dagger pierced in his heart.

Cal goes to him and smoothly runs his hand over his brother’s face to shut his eyes.

“It’s going to be fine. Everything will be,” he says. He puts a warm hand over mine but even his fire can’t kill the coldness inside me. I shiver violently. Tears stream down on my face. I break our contact, snatching back my hand.

“I love him.”


“He doesn’t deserve this.”

“No one does.”

“I forgive him.” I move closer to Maven’s body. “I forgive you. Even after everything.” I whisper, leaning to him. His temperature dropping and matching mine. For some reasons, I feel like we’re the same. He is lifeless, cold. Dead.

I am too! Lifeless. Cold. Dead. I can’t feel my heart beating. I can’t hear it beating.

“Mare. We have to go.”

“I hope my forgiveness finds you.” I can’t hear Cal. I can’t hear anyone. My tears are so loud. I plant a swift kiss on the corner of his lips. I allow myself to stay there for a while.

“Mare.” Cal moved closer to me. He puts a hand on my shoulder, urging me to stand up.

My lips are wet with both my tears and Maven’s silver blood. I stand beside Cal, both of us looking at the fallen king.

“I still love him. Until we meet again.” Cal knows the last four words are for his fallen brother.

After all this time, the real traitor prince, the betrayer, the murderer, the grandest liar… has my heart.

Photo uploaded by @lipnitskayah and tagging @vaveyard

verlinktbeichris  asked:

Does in Weeaboorale give Amalgamates?

no because this:

Also this is how royal scientists are:

Royal scientists in weeabootale are just useless piece of shit that doesn’t do anything 90% of the time.

So yeah, no amalgamates. I know this is a shame since this part was actually awesome (one of my fav parts of the game) but this part just doesn’t fit weeabootale… Alphys did nothing wrong in weeabootale (she just made mettaton and some anime weapons) which is why she’s not depressive or anything. The character who could have done this could have been Gaster instead but he wouldn’t have regreted so… No. too wrong. This part of the game is about regrets and forgivness so yeah. too serious for weeabootale.

instead you have three useless scientists.

or more precisely:

Sans: the guy who doesn’t know anything nor give a shit about science (like i don’t even know why he’s one of the scientists lol)

Alphys: the one who works the most but who mostly makes fun things such as robots (mettaton) or weapons.

And Gaster: the boss who doesn’t do anything half of the time (he probably stopped working after Asgore asked them not to work on bodies) but who can suddently get motivation to do crazy things. I guess this is what happened for the CORE lol.

I know i say i ship kounoi for the hatesex but there’s still just this little ping inside of me thats like… Consider the following

Noiz and Koujaku lying in bed- noiz tracing the tattoos on koujack’s back. In the midst of being half asleep, he tells him about those tattoos and how shameful they are and how he killed his mother and all of the pain and regret. Noiz doesn’t have that same connection with his mom like koujaku did, nor the ability to feel the physical pain from getting the tattoo, but noiz actually tries to think about the pain of losing someone you loved and how upset koujaku must be, and he just brings his head down and places little kisses along each of the flowers because he knows there’s nothing he could say, but the little kisses would speak for themselves and it just dissolves into “manly” crying and cuddles

and that’s what kounoi is all about

someone who feels too much and someone who feels nothing at all

anonymous asked:

I'm 30 and when i look at pictures of 16/17 year old harry he looks like a child. He was a child. I can't believe that caroline was even older than me when she "dated" harry and she thinks it's ok.

I’m 23 and looking at 16/17 year old Harry, I feel zero attraction to him whatsoever and I cannot even begin to imagine (nor would I want to) dating or sleeping with him. It’s disgusting. He was a pretty little cherub. He did not have the face of an adult, he did not have the body of an adult, and most importantly, HE JUST WASN’T A FUCKING ADULT SO WTF ARE YOU DOING CAROLINE?!?! I genuinely can’t comprehend how she justifies it to herself. I don’t care that nothing really happened between them - the world thinks it did, she pretended it did, and she feels no regret or shame for it. She still uses it as a fucking stepping stone for her career by talking about it in interviews. Gross.

So. If David Tennant would ‘just’ play a serial killer in Jessica Jones, would anyone expect him to explain to his audience that murder is a bad thing? Would anyone have been ‘bugged’ or ‘outraged’ or ‘sickened’ that he was giving a lighthearted interview, outlining why his character doesn’t even see himself as evil? 

So, why do so many people feel that he is obligated to educate his fans that Rape Is Bad? Why not assume the most natural thing, which is that - just like with murder - it doesn’t even need pointing out. It’s a given. It’s a fact pretty much agreed upon by everyone. Including, I am sure, David Tennant.

And since a large part of Tumblr - if the pre-outrage since his casting has been announced is anything to go by - seems to agree that fictional rape is worse than fictional murder, why do the same (and more) people seem to think that an education of this kind is necessary?

I have seen posts and comments and tags all but painting David Tennant as a rape apologist, both for taking the role and giving that interview. I have seen posts and comments and tags maintaining that obviously they wouldn’t be fooled so easily by a pretty face and a seductive actor but Other People. Other People who are apparently stupid and easily led and uneducated and socially unaware, so, really, the poster is just trying to protect them. I also have seen posts and comments and tags apologising for being interested in the series at all, like it’s a shameful secret.

And I think… Okay, for one I think that all this is quite insulting to both David Tennant and his fans. It’s also incredibly arrogant. In my experience Other People are never quite as stupid as we like to think they are. Not quite as uneducated, unaware, unthinking as we like to assume. I also think other people deserve the respect we’d like to be given ourselves. (And please stop with that insulting narrative that Little Girls Who Are Probably Tenth Doctor And Rose Fans will not be able to disentangle their crush on an actor or a character from real life. Tumblr is full of Little Girls who have seen more posts about rape, murder, racism, sexism, and all the other -isms too, than I have seen in the first twenty years of my life.)

So, you know. I’d just like people to stop insulting and shaming others who are excited about Jessica Jones. I’d like people to stop having (or at least acting on) that Tumblr knee-jerk reaction of ‘I need to tell the world how wrong and despicable Other People are because they like a tv show I find Problematic. 


YOURS TO LOVE - part 3/4

Its weeks after yours and Luke’s drunken shenanigans and Michael can’t sleep. The only thing lighting up the room was the occasional lighting, thunder was roaring outside and rain was lashing against the windows. Yet you were fast asleep, looking peaceful and free, and Michael has never felt so separated from you; even though you are right there, head resting on his arm as pillow and with his other arms you as a blanket.
He thinks he’d be your blanket if you needed him to. Be your pillow, your bag and carry what you need. Be the clothes on your back, a bullet proof west, be your laugh and reason and be your loyal lover and friend and keep every secret you ever reveal. He thinks he’d be whatever you’d want him to be.

He just fears that what you will need him to be is an accepting ex-boyfriend who doesn’t mind you dating his best friend.

He holds you tighter, feeling the warmth of your body spreading to his chest. Lately his mind has begun to wonder, creating scenarios in his head of you and Luke; full of love and happiness for each other and then he, left out and forgotten in the cold, only remembered when he is to be pitied.

He pulls you even closer, tells himself it is to keep warm; to keep that empty hollowness away from his chest, and not to keep you there, keeping you from running away to Luke.

He lets go of you a little, he doesn’t want to make you feel trapped, he doesn’t want to trap you.

Keep reading


Okay, dusting this old Tumblr off after forever, because it has recently come into my attention that someone’s reposted a photo of my work on Tumblr and it is currently spreading around. I…haven’t ever been in a situation like this, not really knowing how to react so I think the best I can do is give an explanation, so you can understand a few things before anyone rails me for putting furry art in an art gallery.

Firstly, TL;DR: I displayed this, my school and my class had no beef with it, even liked it, I have no shame and should not have shame, I am proud of my work, and HAVE SOME REPOSTING ETIQUETTE SERIOUSLY.

The school (NOVA) did not explicitly display this, I did. The school did NOT take this down for its content though. My Drawing 3 class teacher said that there would be an art showing in school and that it could be nice (as well as extra credit opportunities) for displaying your work. The two works I displayed for the gallery are here in this post, even though one mainly in attention was the first one. The only, ONLY time this particular image got taken down was simply because it had to be moved from one hallway to one in another building with all of the other work, and it fell underneath a bench in the process, where it was then taken back up to my classroom by the next session with only a note that it fell. Nothing that gave any idea that it was removed for its content.

The class of which this was originally given a CRITIQUE SESSION before I could even think of displaying it, had no problems with the content as well. They even actually enjoyed it. Even if the background is honestly complete trash (backgrounds, almost as much of a bane to me as hands.) So I had my class’s approval towards displaying this, as well as my teacher’s support and blessing.

I am a proud artist and cartoonist through and through. I have no shame for any of my artwork I do, and I have pride for my work. An art gallery is where you want to show off your best work, and those two were some of the best work I’ve done in a long while. That’s all that mattered to me, more than the content. I don’t care what the content of it happens to be, so long as I’ve worked my hardest as I can, I do not have any regrets for the work I have displayed nor for any work I display in the future. Something you should have feelings for about your own creations as well. TL;DR, yeah I have the self confidence to show my own work off. (Which I would love to thank my Drawing class for, you have helped me develop a lot in my confidence as an artist.)

Do not repost my artwork without sourcing back or asking for permission. One of my only main beefs with the guy who made that post is the lack of them communicating with me. In the art gallery I’m required to give my name, and my email. They were right there for you to talk to me about the art, that’s also the point of an art gallery. I’m willing to show my own work off in public and link its source to me. The least you can do is reciprocate. This should be common courtesy anyway. Always provide the source as well as have the permission to share.

I think I’ve pretty much explained things the best I can. I don’t know if I should have but I needed to do something. And maybe it’s just fatigue and the resulting nihilistic attitude from having gone through an all nighter, with no extra sleep to make up for it and a long day, but yeah I…still don’t know how to take this.

My two featured works are right there in the post so you can see in that sweet, sweet source quality. Much better than what a camera of it would give you. This, you may reblog, but maintain the message I’ve written for this particular one.

If you are interested in talking to me about my art, or even if I can work on something for you, feel free to email me at rikkitheblackfox@gmail.com !

(Honestly I dunno if I /can/ really offer commissions but I’ll be sure to feel really flattered about it and consider it! Who knows!)

Thanks for your reading and understanding.

juls-92  asked:

Can we talk about the fact that Clary in this episode is actually the most supporting one toward Alec? The way she push him to make decisions as a leader, the way she says to Simon "i'm fine, I'm with Alec" and the way she pat him on the arm when he said "I didn't screw up everything". And then the big difference with the book, when she tells him that she knows that he's in love with Jace. In the books they were both angry and said thing they regret. Here they were more calm, more mature in fact

This is why I’m loving this show so much, they have been giving us supportive relationships between characters since the day one (with highs and lows but that’s the plot, so) and I honestly think this is great. We’ve got a Clary who still is insecure and scared and who wants to find her mom more than anything else but we’ve also got a Clary who’s supportive and accepting, who does not slut-shame Izzy nor use Alec’s sexuality to fight him back.
And we’ve got the Lightwood Siblings in all their amazingness but also more mature and accepting towards Clary. Izzy, especially, who quickly demonstrates a kind of maternal/sisterly love for Clary understanding the difficult position in which the girl is.
And Alec. Still the insecure, kinda in the shadow, sarcastic, grumpy Alec from the books but better. Same as Izzy, he’s more mature even if he dislikes Clary, which is understandable. But they will become teammates anyway, so.

I’m so happy with this show, I will never stop saying this. They’re giving us great things and I’m grateful.

westerhos  asked:

in queencersei's recent meta she mentioned how cersei does not regret what she's done. however, how do you atone for the excessive bathing following her walk through kings landing? or the visions she sees of ned stark, sansa, lady, and melara when she's climbing aegon's high hill? could these things not be seen as regret? certainly, there is some shame there as well (for me, though, the line between shame and regret is blurry)? i was just wondering how you might interpret these things!

Hey hey I can give you an explanation to that myself, as author of that piece (it’s really not recent, it’s at least one year old but I tend to stand by most of what I said!) annnd you make a good point, although I don’t think that is regret at all. I mean, to me, and because of what Cersei is to me, the washing is an attempt at cleaning herself of the humiliation, not the act she’s had to “atone” for. We know when Cersei takes the walk it is not because she wants to atone, it’s because she wants to go back to Tommen, terrified as she is at the thought of having him surrounded by Tyrells. Hence, the atonement is not a choice of cleansing, it’s a choice of circumstance. She does not feel the atonement, she does not, ultimately, atone for any of her actions. She does, however, do what she must in order to be free of the Septon’s grip and go back to the Red Keep. (It is important to remember that throughout the walk the one thing that spurs her to keep walking is the Red Keep in the distance, knowing the faster she walks, the faster it’ll all be over and she’ll get back to Tommen. That does not sound like atonement at all, that sound like “Get on with it,” which is exactly what she says when the septas come into her cell to shave her.) Hence, the cleaning is because of the humiliation, the things that have been bellowed at her, the insults and japes, and the fact that less than worthy eyes violated her intimacy by seeing her naked. For Cersei, that’s a stain, because she has always thought herself superior, and the fact that the smallfolk could violate her like that is something she wishes she could wash away. It’s not her actions, but the walk itself she tries to wash away.

As for the hallucinations, I don’t really see that as regret either, nor shame. It’s possibly awareness. Cersei knows exactly who she has wronged, but she is also strong in her belief of having done that for the right reasons. In a way, when she sees all those people, it’s as if she is trying to find culprits in a crowd of people without a face. So she sees Sansa, she sees her own father, she sees Ned Stark. All of them had a part in this, for Cersei. All of them are to blame. And blame them she does, because their actions are what brought her to act as she did, to defend herself (in Cersei’s prspective,) and their actions are therefore indirectly responsible for what is happening to her as she walks.

Joffrey is different. Joffrey’s death is a trauma of course, as every child’s death is for a mother. Cersei thinks about Joffrey constantly, remembers him as golden and beautiful, and he is the strength that makes her move. Everything she does, after Joffrey’s death, is spurred by some desperate attempt at self-defense from invisible forces that target her, and Joffrey is always present in her POVs. So that is probably why he pops up on the streets of King’s Landing too, as a means of encouragement to herself, a way to tell herself to go on. And there might also be a blame factor that she places upon herself, in Joffrey’s death, in that she couldn’t protect him and save him, but also upon him, in that by dying he left her.

Ultimately it can be up to interpretation, but because of Cersei’s attitude towards the atonement in general, I think it’s wishful thinking to consider it regret. Cersei is not one to regret what she does because she is sure of being right, she is the embodiement of the famous saying “every vilain is the hero of their own story”, she is absolutely unaware of being wrong, mostly because she is a highly delusional individual. (and I mean it in the most affectionate way, because Cersei’s delusions, although they spark questionable behaviour, are rooted in the tragic factor of womanhood in Westeros, and the failed meeting of high expectations).