i have a lot of questions to answer from people

frezgle  asked:

Hey, I have a question you might know the answer to... I've often read a bit of trivia that states that the original Godzilla suit wasn't dark grey like most of them - but I never see what color it actually was. And all the photos I can find are in greyscale so that obviously doesn't help. What color was my boy? D:

To tell you the truth I don’t know for sure! I hear from a lot of people that Shodaigoji was brown but I never see any sources for that claim. Maybe Astoudingbeyondbelief or Raffleupagus would know.

I’ve got the Classic Media and Criterion DVDs, I’ll watch the bonus features on those. Maybe the answer is on there. If it is I’ll make a post and tag you!

Bucky adjusting to the modern world would include... (Headcanon)


Summary: You help Bucky Barnes adjust to the modern world and it’s adorable.

Word count: 463

Warnings: None

A/N: Bucky Barnes will be the death of me.


Originally posted by marvel-dirtbag

Visiting numerous museums where he could read about himself and the good life he lived
Little kids gazing in awe at Bucky as they innocently touch his metal arm and bombard him with questions about his life
Kid: “Mr Bucky, Sir, what was the war like?”
Kid: “How did you survive the fall?”
Kid: “Why did you kill lots of people?”
Bucky becoming anxious because he isn’t able to handle and/or answer all their questions
Having to take over and steer Bucky away from the growing crowd as he starts to break down
Bucky constantly feeling bad that you have to go home early because of his anxiety.
You: “Buck, let’s get home. I only wanted to see the parts about you anyway.”
Spending hours in department stores as Bucky marvels at all of the new technology
Bucky walking around the shop with an abundance of VERY expensive items in his arms so he can show them to you
Worker: “Sir, if you wouldn’t mind putting those items down.”
Bucky constantly receiving dirty looks from shop assistants as he touches everything a little too roughly
Worker: “Sir, please put that down! Oh lord…. Security!?!”
Bucky managing to rip security wires tied to expensive products wayyyyy too many times
Having to desperately explain to the police he didn’t try and steal the £10,000 product, he was just looking
You: “Officer, look it’s not that big of a deal, I’m sure it happens all the time”
Policeman: “Not. Once.”
Setting up Snapchat for Bucky
Walking into the kitchen every day and finding Bucky and Steve going through all of the filters
Bucky whipping out the dog filter at every inappropriate moment
Bucky arguing with Tony about how he’s still masculine despite wanting to look like an adorable puppy 99.9% of the time
Bucky: “At least I don’t hide in a tin can!”
Tony: “At least magnets don’t attach themselves to my arm when I open the fridge because there’s certainly nothing ‘manly’ about that either!”
Bucky loving to go to aquariums
Bucky: “Y/N! Y/N!!! Look at the colourful fish! Y/N you’re not looking at the pretty fish!”
Bucky freaking out when you tell him you’ve organised a trip to an aquarium where he can feed the sharks
You: “Bucky! Don’t lean in so far! Sharks still bite in the 21st century!”
Buck freaking out, even more, when you organise an outing at the zoo where he’ll be able to feed the penguins
Bucky: “You’re joking, right? Penguins! OMP.”
You: “It’s 'OMG’, Bucky.”
Bucky: “Oh no, I meant Oh My Penguins, I’m hoping it’ll catch on!”
Bucky wanting to constantly to go back and see the penguins
Bucky: “Can we buy one?”
You: “No, Bucky they live in zoos.”
Bucky: “Can we buy a zoo then?”

A/N: REQUESTS ARE OPEN and constructive criticism is appreciated!

Sexism and elitism in the reptile industry.


I know we have talked about this a number of times before, but I wanted to touch base on this again using my experience from last weekends expo now that I have some time to sit down and talk about it.

I had the privilege of taking with me my friend Scott, who knows little to nothing about reptiles, and my friend Rie who is a bird person. The expo actually went swimmingly for the most part, until I stopped at the booth belonging to Vince Russo. He may be more recognizable to people as the author of The Complete Boa. From what I have heard, a lot of people have had some very enjoyable experiences with this guy– healthy animals delivered to them, comprehensive answers given when asked questions, etc. My personal experience with him really wasn’t as nice, but it wasn’t inherently terrible, and I’ll get into that in a moment.

I had been eyeballing his table for a while because I was tentatively considering picking something up and I had heard through the grapevine that he was starting to really actually get into Sumatran Short Tails and I wanted to take a peek at what he might have. What I noticed first was a pair of girls approaching him, one asking something about one of the boas, saying that it looked similar to another morph she had seen. He straightened up, and with the most condescending tone I had heard in a while, not only corrected her but proceeded to talk to her like she was a child.

Then I approached.

My friend Scott was closer to Vince and was asking questions and our friendly author of The Complete Boa spoke to him very enthusiastically. He answered all of his questions professionally and pleasantly. I was standing a few feet away with Rie because I spotted a pair of SSTPs. One muddy male with yellow casting and a female with several kinks in her lower spine. They are labeled “BLACK BLOODS.” I say to Rie, “this is actually something to pay attention to because it can confuse people. There’s no such thing as a black blood, they’re Sumatran short tails. Same as the term Borneo bloods, Python breitensteini is a different species than brongersmai.”

Vince Russo cuts in and very loudly states “Borneo is Python BREITENSTEINI.” To which I very curtly said, “Yeah, I’m aware, I just said that, but thanks.”

He proceeded to tell me about how I should buy his P. curtus, but to keep in mind that he is only selling lone males. “I’m not selling any lone females” he says as I look down at the female, who has kinks down 1/3 of her body and despite that is listed at the same price as the male. I politely told him that I wasn’t really sure if I wanted to buy anything at all and he cut me off and said even louder “you won’t find them anywhere else. I’m the only guy I know who breeds them. You need to get them while you can.”

Me, being the asshole that I am, told him that I can name ten off of the top of my head and he claimed he’s never heard of any of them, including Kara Norris which I find very hard to believe.

This really does not seem like that big of a deal and in reality it’s not– I had very pleasant conversations with Mike Schultz of Outback Reptiles and his girlfriend who was so, so happy to introduce people to blood pythons and discuss the difference in temperament from CH, WC and CBB offspring. I bring this up because I’m seeing a LOT of new younger women start to become interested in the hobby and micro-aggressive behavior like what Vincent Russo displayed is so prevalent in the community. Had I not known better, if I were more ignorant and not as immersed in the hobby, I might have listened to Russo and bought that cheap, low quality Sumatran short tail without looking into other options, etc.

I talk about this every single time I go to an expo because it’s so important for women, girls, and just generally people who are new to the hobby to be aware and take everything you hear with a grain of salt. Some people will flat out lie to you, others will belittle you. I have had the experience of a breeder blatantly disallowing me from holding a large constrictor because he didn’t think I could “handle it.” I’ve had vendors try to outright slander the name of other breeders in good standing with the community in an effort to complete a sale.

I watched one young man end up buying what was very obviously an unhealthy bearded dragon that was showing a number of MBD symptoms to be told that “that’s normal” and “sometimes they just look like that.”

Please, please, please be aware of what is going on around you. Do not tolerate being treated like a child by vendors if you have questions. I will be honest and say that most of my interactions with vendors at expos are great and I meet a lot of awesome people. But the people who AREN’T great, the people who will lie or bring unhealthy animals to expos or treat people with no respect are the people that we need to weed the hell out of the hobby.

End rant.

Welcome to Skull Island: on set with Tom Hiddleston and the biggest King Kong ever
The director and cast of Kong: Skull Island, including Brie Larson and Samuel L Jackson, discuss filming opposite an 85ft ape – while using as little green screen as possible
By Benjamin Lee

“Apologies for the shirtlessness,” says Tom Hiddleston. “I didn’t want to show off.” The world’s most impeccably spoken Marvel baddie is looking awfully embarrassed. I’ve caught him emerging topless from his trailer, late at night, with female company. The makeup artist has been in with him, carefully pawing at his torso. Hiddleston is shooting a movie in Hawaii and, as it is, his skin doesn’t look sufficiently sun damaged. Muddier stuff is slathered on, and our star is good to go.

Keep reading

How to Get the Most Out of Your Tarot Reading

Tarot readings are cool, but why not make them AWESOME? Here’s some ways you can be sure to get the most out of your divination situation.

🔮Have a Question In Mind- This sounds pretty obvious, but it’s astounding how many people I read for that have no idea what they want out of it. Wanting a general reading is fine, but definitely have an answer to the question “what would you like to know?” when you sit down/place an order. Thinking about what you want helps you solidify the question with the cards, and helps you avoid thinking an hour later, “Drat! I should have asked about _____.”

🔮Think about How You Frame your Question- Tarot has different strengths and weaknesses, like any divination form. Playing to these strengths will help your reader give you a more fulfilling answer! For example, I once had a querent purchase multiple readings from me asking for very specific times of things. While tarot CAN be used in that way, it is much harder and in my experience usually comes at the expense of more valuable information. A better version of, “when will X happen?” is “what will make X happen?” or “What must I do before X?” That way you know if X requires specific action on your part, instead of sitting around waiting for “Oh, maybe about three months” and nothing happening. Phrasing your question in a way that milks the most information out of the cards makes for a better reading!

🔮Know Your Reader- First and foremost, a tarot reader is not the same as a psychic. A lot of psychics use tarot cards as a tool, but most people just offering readings can’t tell you the name of your future spouse or the color of your great-grandfather’s shirt when he died. Secondly, every reader is different! Some are intuitive readers and pull cards from the middle of the deck, some have you choose the cards, others deal from the top, and that’s just one example. Every reader has a different style to their interpretation that makes for a unique experience, so if possible, be picky with who you choose to purchase from. Some readers work better with certain types of questions. Maybe some give more detail in their interpretations. Some readers tell a little story about each card, which people can like or dislike. Some have trouble delivering bad news. Some just may not resonate with you! If you have the ability to check out multiple readers, especially online, definitely do so and find one who you think lines up with your needs the best.

🔮Don’t Be Afraid to Confide- The phrase, “I have a question in mind, but I’m not going to tell you” makes me want to rip my hair out. In my experience, people do this less because they want answers and more because they want to be impressed by a display of Tarot’s accuracy and the reader’s intuitiveness. They want to see the reader still pick up on the Truth with no outside input. This is all fine and dandy, but it’s not going to give you a lot of information. Why? It’s going to be vague! I can’t connect the dots as well if I don’t have half of them. It’s okay to give me some information about your question; it helps me pick out signs I may have not found significant without context. That said, I understand the fear of just having a reader use your words to tell you what you already know and call it divination. So don’t feel like you need to over share, either! If you want to know about whether to break up with your partner over that argument two days ago or not, a simple, “I’ve been having relationship problems and would like some insight on how to move forward.” Should work fine. That should allow you to still get a display of the reader’s intuitive ability (identifying the specifics of your situation) while still getting an actual answer.

🔮Interpret For Yourself- Yeah yeah, do my job for me. But not quite. Sometimes there are symbols that strike us that the reader may not emphasize in their interpretation. You know yourself better than they do, after all. If you think the cards are saying something extra to you, feel free to include that in your personal takeaway! If a reader asks, “what does this mean to you?/does anything stand out to you?” (this happens more in person than online) it’s totally okay to say, “I find X really interesting because Y. How do you think that ties in with the rest of the reading?” Feel free to start a conversation over it. Pick these cards apart with your reader. I, at least, love when querents do this. It shows they’re invested and engaged, and it lets me pull even more information out for them.

🔮Take a Picture- If you can. Sometimes online readings come with a photo of your spread! (Mine do.) Look back on the photo with a fresh mind later and reflect on it. Have you come up with any new personal interpretations for it? (Once I had a reading that I thought was about starting a business, but realized later it was about me writing a book!) What do each the cards actually mean? Are there any patterns in the spread you notice? It can also be fun to look back on it much later and see how accurate it was!

🔮Get Readings from Multiple People- I like a little variety, but I also just like people. I have people I go to for when I need a really solid dependable reading, but I also enjoy talking to other readers and seeing how they do it differently. I know it’s helped me improve a lot as a reader. If you’re able, consider getting your question answered through multiple sources (but be respectful, we’re still people.) See if there are any common threads between the two interpretations (it happens quite frequently.) See how they differ! It’s more work and money but is usually fairly interesting.

🔮Don’t Take it Too Seriously- At the end of the day, getting a reading is not going to change your life. Only you do that. While tarot can be a magnificent tool for insight, it is not an actual changing force in and of itself. Don’t stress too hard over it and be sure to use it alongside your own judgement, intuitiveness, heart, and common sense. And most importantly, enjoy it for the sake of enjoying an art form!

If you’d like to purchase a reading from me, you can do so here!

Originally posted by limoniume

neenah2012  asked:

I have question I hope you can answer. Did Hanyu change the transitions in his free in 4CC from past performances? I have seen analysis of it before and they say that he has the hardest and most varied transitions in H&L but now I find people saying that it was a lot of crossovers and two footed skating because he was trying to land his quads. I can't tell the difference when it comes to transitions, and I hope you can help me understand this . Thank you this wonderful blog, it is a joy to read

Being brutally honest (again :P), I can only suppose those people don’t know what a crossover is nor what is two-foot skating.

If those people is still TSL, it’s not a supposition but just a statement. Really, do not give them your time. They need the buzz of being controversial to try and stay relevant and they need the buzz to pay back those fools giving them any money (:

Now, coming to your question, thankfully there are people who do things and save me time :P so here you are a direct comparison of Hope&Legacy in all its versions up to now from Autumn Classic to 4CC:

It’s pretty evident how the program was way more rich @ 4CC compared to the the start of the season and even comparing it to GPF you can notice some touches more.

Transition wise the biggest thing that was taken out @ 4CC was the last part of his entry to the second axel combo (at GPF, ie, he just goes straight into his 3A, at 4CC he takes a bit more to enter the 4T).

If you want an analysis of this program for what falls under transition, the best one around is still this one: http://chibura.tumblr.com/post/154115680890/transitions-in-mens-free-programs-at-gpf-2016

This is a video of his step sequence explained (this is not directly linked to TR, but it helps to understand the different kind of steps and turns and to check them vs what Yuzu does outside his sequence):

And this a comparison video of everything that is not jumps/spins between Chen and Yuzuru at 4CC:

(And thank you for your compliment :D )

ladyknighttime  asked:

How much has your blog changed/ how many new followers do you have since the crucifix nail stuff?

This time last year I had just under 1000 followers. As of right now I have 11,269

My inbox went from silent to anywhere from 20 messages to 200 if it’s a busy day. Most of it not spam and I always feel bad that I don’t manage to keep up.

I could make posts without people trying to admonish me for talking about certain things, or treating me like a news source. But on the other hand when I do post other things I am faced with overwhelming love and support that is quite frankly humbling. The kindness is more common that the other.

I get tagged in so many posts so often I can’t keep up. Tumblr has straight up stopped telling me when I get comments on posts. It doesn’t even tell me when I get new followers anymore, despite having these settings turned on.

Random mad cap ideas I never thought much of have ended up being turned into novel ideas. As such I don’t have time to write much fanfic but I miss the Dishonored prompts every now and then. My dash used to be very fandom focused but now it’s mostly politics and fundraisers and answering a lot of questions I don’t always feel qualified to answer. I miss the former, but know I have to use whatever small platform I have for good.

In short, it’s gone from fandom and fun to being a near full time job that I don’t quite know how to keep up with but am nevertheless immensley thankful for, for the found family it has brought me, and the friends who are closer than blood.

Even when people insist on spamming me with my own shit post editing stories that refuse to die :p

I can’t believe I’m making a post defending Even again but welp here we go

I am so tired of seeing posts attacking Even about what may or may not have happened at Bakka, and about how he may or may not have kept things hidden from Isak.

Even is a very private character. We know this. There is a lot about himself that he keeps inside, even from the people he loves. I don’t doubt that he still hides a lot from Isak, because deep down, he is still very scared of losing him. Even deflects a lot of questions about himself away; tries to charm his way out of answering them. This doesn’t mean he’s a player. This doesn’t mean he’s a bad person. This means he’s a very scared and insecure person; more so, I think, than Isak. And yes, he’s a little more secure in himself now. Yes, he’s happy with Isak. But that doesn’t immediately mean those thoughts Even had about himself, his illness and whatever happened at Bakka, go away overnight. Or, really, in four months. That type of deeply ingrained “this person will leave me” mentality takes years to undo and actually, nearly always stays in the back of a person’s head, no matter how happy they are in their current relationship. 

Also, we don’t know whether or not Isak knows about what happened at Bakka. There’s a chance Isak does know. There’s a chance Even told him. We don’t know.

I don’t want to really talk about the whole “what if Even was with Mikael and cheated him with Sonja?? Once a cheat, always a cheat!” thing. But I will say this: surprise! Doing something bad does not make you a bad person, and situations are complicated. Cheating is horrible, yes, and Even should have broken up with Sonja before he and Isak shared their first kiss. But does that make him a terrible person?? No!! His relationship with Sonja was in tatters; we know this. We also know she was controlling. We also know she knew about his bipolar disorder and that Even most likely felt like he couldn’t leave her, seeing as she’d supported him through everything and, as I’ve said, was controlling.

In an ideal world, yes, Even would have broken up with her before him and Isak got together. But he didn’t. What he did do, though, was break up with Sonja immediately after his weekend with Isak and told her about Isak. This is not what someone who is a serial cheater would do; he didn’t string her along, play her, lie to her. He was honest. He broke things off. And yes, he briefly reconnected with her, but that was only after Isak made his comments about mentally ill people. Of course he would run back to a place of safety after hearing something like that. 

I really, really doubt Even and Mikael dated. The clip we have of the two of them at Bakka showed a friendship, to me, more than anything else. I didn’t really get a hint of anything more between the two of them, but who knows, maybe I’ll be proven wrong. There is so much we don’t know, but hating on Even over stuff we don’t know is stupid. 

I doubt that Julie would take a character who is bisexual and bipolar - two things that people consistently and wrongfully associate with ‘playing’ and ‘cheating’ - and reinforce those negative stereotypes even more.

I hope people have a little more brains than to force Even into those stereotypes too.


And a few other announcements! :) *** Updated march 20th

Thanks so much to everyone that came out to see me at ShutoCon!!!

It’s always so wonderful to get to talk to people that enjoy my work face to face and chat a bit! It’s definitely the kind of experience that I’ll never forget and always look back on and appreciate! (omg, you all made me feel really special with all your kind words and excitement, and really, thank you, thank you, thank you for that!) TwT

Other Stuff announcements!

Comics back in the Etsy shop? Soon! I have some left over from Shutocon but I seem to have picked up a case of ‘convention-plague’, so I’m gonna take it easy for a bit and put them up for sale next week when i’m better. Added bonus of me not sending out bio-hazard books.)

I’ve gotten a lot of questions asking if I’m gonna include things from ‘Breath of the Wild’ in ‘A Tale of Two Rulers’: Answer is, probably not because I don’t wanna spoil anything for people, plus the whole comic is already written out to the end and I don’t think a rewrite is necessary. 

And a few other people were wondering how my MRI turned out (thanks for caring about my health btw, that’s super nice) and I’m Officially OK!!! I’ve apparently just got a thing called “Benign episodic unilateral mydriasis“. Which means ‘Sometimes my eyes get wonky for no particular reason but i seem to be ok anyway’) i’m VERY happy about this! XD

( oh but an overall warning to anyone out there who might also suddenly have  their pupils get significantly different sizes from each other, DO go see a doctor about it. I got lucky, but that can be an important indicator of some SERIOUS health problems. Don’t overlook your own symptoms because you heard that I ended up being ok! It’s really important to be attentive and take care of yourself!

I’ll get to answering some asks in my inbox later this month, but overall, thank you so much for all the kind words! It really does help me keep up the work on the comic. I love to hear that what I’m making is entertaining people and making them happy! :)

And that’s it for now! Thanks again!

-Fig (aka Lor)

anonymous asked:

I hope this doesn't stray into Sam Advises, but with everything happening, I'm wondering... how do we keep at it? Everything is overwhelming and we're just rolling with the punches. And I GET that it's deliberate, but it feels like we're not getting traction and neither are our representatives. Are we really going to have to do this for four years? Four years of uneasy sleep for me? All you fascists bound to lose, sure, but WHEN?

It’s a tough question to answer, Anon, and kind of requires a lot of discussion, but I think the most important thing to remember is that you are not personally required to defend all things to all people at all times. Even if you are from a group that needs defending and are by necessity forced to defend yourself, you are allowed to defend only yourself on occasion, and you are allowed to withdraw and take breaks.

Traction takes time. And we will lose a lot of the small fights because they have all the power and money on their side. The trick is accepting a loss without accepting its inevitability – allowing yourself to say “okay, we lost that one, here’s how we can work to soften the blow, here’s how we can fight so we don’t lose the next one”. And to put faith in the people who are fighting, to hear their stories and draw inspiration from their fight, whether or not they won. 

There’s a lot of debate in many circles over the definition of self-care, but this is one of them: when you feel burnout coming on, you have the right to withdraw, to look after yourself for a while, to take a break so that you can return refreshed. If a loss knocks you back, take the time to acknowledge the loss and the knock, let your bruises heal a little, and then jump back in so someone else can tap out. That’s why we organize in groups: so that someone is covering our six when we need it, and we can have someone else’s six when they do. 

So your job is to do what you can, to know the signs you’re burning out however those manifest for you (fatigue, anxiety, issues with work/life balance, too many unwashed dishes in the sink, whatever and however it shows for you) and to know what will refresh you – taking a day to rest, buying yourself something small that you normally wouldn’t, spending time with friends, a vacation, whatever.  It is okay to turn off the news and to blacklist things that will upset you for a few days. It’s okay to say “I can’t talk about this” and walk away sometimes. 

This is a marathon, not a sprint, which is a tired saying but true. Sprinters run fast and steady and don’t stop because they can’t, because the goal’s in sight. Marathoners can’t see the finish line, and can’t possibly run their fastest the whole way, because they’d drop from exhaustion before they reached it. So they pace themselves, they eat along the way, they walk it off if they get a cramp. Know when to walk it off for a while. 

It’s normal to be anxious in the situation we’re in, but we have to learn to manage it somehow. Uneasy sleep makes for tired people who aren’t going to help as much as they could – so you have to find a way to take all the anger and fear and put it away so that you can rest. How you do that is a matter of trial and error; try things until something works. And if you have a few sleepless nights, well, that’s a sign you need to take some time. 

Nobody will die because you, yourself, personally and alone, took a day off. We are all responsible for each other precisely so that nobody bears that burden alone. And the fight will be stronger tomorrow because you took a nap today. :) 

A caution about asking pronouns.

Gender-related etiquette is rarely simple.

In fact, no etiquette is as simple as people want to make questions like this.  Basically, you’re never going to find a simple formula that applies to all people in all situations.  And anyone claiming there is one simple formula is either misleading you or has been misled themselves.

But what am I specifically talking about today?

You know how trans, genderless, gender-ambiguous (as seen by others), and/or gender non-conforming people (and anyone I forgot) are always getting rude, invasive comments and questions that can often lead to physical or social violence if we don’t answer, or don’t answer correctly?

Like, “Are you a boy or a girl?”  I have had people get in my face and demand to know that, getting louder and more threatening the more I stayed silent.  And being totally unable to respond even if I’d wanted to.  I was 13 the first time someone asked me if I was a “she-male”.  

Well… you know how there’s that ever-present question, that everyone asks to try to be polite?  “What are your preferred pronouns?”

Just be aware that for a whole lot of people any or all of the following may be true, and you can’t tell by looking or even by whether they answer you or not:

  • The answer may not be simple.
  • The answer may change day to day.
  • They may not know the answer.
  • There may not be an answer.
  • They might regard the answer as personal and none of your business.
  • They might find the reminder of their gender experiences upsetting.
  • Regardless of whether there is an answer, they may find the question just as invasive and with the potential of social (and even other kinds of) violence as my aggressive encounters with people asking “Are you a boy or a girl?” 
  • Answering may force them to think within a framework that’s alien to their experience of gender.
  • They may regard such an answer as just a more socially acceptable (in trans circles) form of the “Are you a boy or a girl?” question.
  • Any answer they give, even if truthful as to their preferences, may be misleading in other respects, and thus they don’t want to answer.
  • They don’t want to give the impression that they’ll judge you if you forget their pronouns.
  • They don’t want to answer but they don’t want to call attention to themselves by not answering.

One of my favorite quotes, relevant here:  

“The tight weave of traditions that makes a comfortable hammock for some just as surely makes a noose that strangles others.” -Anneli Rufus

That goes for new traditions as well as old ones.  I understand why asking pronouns is the height of politeness and respect for some people.  Really, I do understand that, it requires no explanation.  But try to keep in mind that for other people, it can be intrusive, confusing, and emotionally devastating.  I wish I could tell you how to tell the difference, but I’m not sure anybody knows that.  

If this confuses you at all, think of a situation where there’s a question that some people don’t care if you ask, and others find incredibly rude and invasive:  “How much money do you make?” “When’s the baby due?”  And remember that often asking pronouns is another way of asking gender and not everyone finds it non-invasive for you to ask – or demand – to know their gender.

Just know that there are people who feel so strongly about the ritual of making everyone go around the room and say their preferred pronouns, that they will stop coming around to LGBTQ events where this ritual has become expected of everyone.  And be aware that saying “I’d rather not say” can, in itself, single a person out even more for attention they don’t want in the first place, as well as mislead people who make snap judgments about things like that.

As to how to deal with a social world where some people want very much for you to ask their pronouns, while others want just as much for you not to… I think everyone is going to have to figure that out as we go along.  But awareness that this custom is not universally respectful is the first step towards figuring anything out.  And a lot of people overlook this as even being a possibility.  So – I don’t pretend to know the answers, but at least I’m asking the question.

[This post originated from conversations with people who find the question much more consistently invasive than I do.  Whether I find the question invasive depends on the environment.  But just understand that not everyone wants the very first thing that happens in a meeting, to be asked an intense personal question that might dredge up all kinds of unwanted emotions and social possibilities.  And they may not always be able or willing to let you know.  How you deal with this information is up to you, just know that you’d be surprised who feels this way and who doesn’t, sometimes.]

anonymous asked:

Nicefandom-san, is the One Piece fandom welcoming? Be honest... I don't want to upset anyone I follow if I send them asks or leave comment on their posts... Do you have blogs you can recommend to0?

Hey, anon!! First of all, I’m sorry for being late! I already explained from yesterdar, but today I had too much homework. And well, I can finally answer your question ;)

About the One Piece Fandom, I feel they’re so welcome. I have found many beautiful and friendly people here. I like how some blogs interact with the rest of the fandom or discuss their opinions, theories or ideas some times. That’s what I can say about this fandom ^^

Now to recommend some blogs, I already did this like two or three times before. But I’ll do a new one and with more a lot blogs and I want to have a list complete! 

Something I want to say before is that I’m so picky about the blogs I follow, like if they create content and I like it, tag the spoilers (not always, tbh but I get mad when I get spoiled), don’t post art without credit and permission of the author or don’t tag Sanji as a Vinsmoke (I’m serious). So all these blogs I’m not following them for any reason, lol.

Since the list is gonna be long, it’s below the cut!

Keep reading


I spent most of last night with my cursor hovering over “delete blog.”

Most of you have been amazing, supportive, appreciative, and understanding of the fact that I run this blog on my own. In four years, I have answered close to 10,000 questions, with an average of about six per day. This takes up an incredible amount of my time each day, and I do it without compensation, without asking for donations or “coffee money,” without asking anything from you except that you follow my ask rules. WQA has been a joy for me, because it has been a joy to help all of you. 

Once in a while, however, a question of a social nature comes along and my answer stirs up absurd amounts of drama. People who do not normally follow this blog see a post in their feed, get incredibly butthurt about something I said, and go on the attack. It takes this blog from being something I enjoy doing to something I wish I’d never begun. And, bear in mind, I don’t mind at all when people disagree with something I’ve said or when they point out something I missed or got wrong. It’s just, if you’re going to be a complete asshole about it, you’re not helping anyone. You’re just being an asshole, and right now we need fewer assholes and more nice people who are willing to help each other out.

After a lot of thought, I realized that it would be unfair to punish the wonderful WQA community (and you are 30k strong) because of the actions of a few assholes. So, for now, WQA will remain open. HOWEVER, from now on, I will not be answering any questions of a social nature, to even the slightest degree, period. No exceptions. Questions pertaining to social matters will be deleted. And, the fact of the matter is this: if you have a question of a social nature, you shouldn’t be asking me anyway. If you’re worried about cultural appropriation, educate yourself on cultural appropriation. I promise the information is out there. If you’re worried about portraying race, mental illness, LGBQT+, disability, disease, etc., look for any number of writing-related blogs that specialize in answering these types of questions (some are listed in my ask rules), or do some research yourself so that you can better understand these topics. :)

The inbox will remain closed for a few more days, but I’m going to answer the questions in the queue, so long as they are not social in nature.

Have a great rest of the week and weekend!


I’m in a Mood.

It’s been a long time since I’ve used Count Blogula in any sort of blog format, but I’m in a mood. I went to bed in a mood, I woke up in a mood, and usually the only way I can shake off a mood is to talk about it. I’ve talked about it, and lo and behold, the mood is still here, kicking and screaming. So I’m writing about it.

I know my reputation. I’m the Cyborg Queen. I have a black soul and a mechanical heart. When you send me your questions, my answers are honest and to the point. I don’t coddle, I don’t sugar coat, and I certainly won’t tell you what you want to hear just to make you feel better. Because of this, people assume I’m cold. Fuck, people assume a lot about me solely based on my vlogs. I get it. I understand where it comes from. But a lot of it is inaccurate.

In reality, I’m not all that uncaring. I just don’t show my affection verbally. I’m not the person who will shower you in meaningless praise, because it’s exactly that—meaningless. If I’m going to help someone, it’s through my actions: favors, gifts, advice, assistance. I believe the best way to help a person is to actually help them—to spend my time doing something that will make their life easier. This, to me, is where real affection lies. Actions speak louder than words.

I’m especially passionate about this when it comes to my fellow writers. I know how it feels to be alone with your writing, to have zero support, zero guidance. I know firsthand how daunting the writing journey can be, and I know how much harder it is when you’ve got no one in your corner. So I take it upon myself to be in other writers’ corners. I answer their questions, I lend them my research, I read their material, I critique it. I do this shit all the fucking time, even when it conflicts with my very intense schedule, and I especially extend myself for people I consider friends. Maybe that’s my problem. Maybe I’m too accommodating. And I don’t know why I do this, because half the time, I regret it.

I’m well aware that this is my fault for expecting decency out of people in the first place. I’ve been in this world long enough to know that, when given the option, a lot of people will choose selfishness over kindness. I know this, yet I’m still disappointed. I have beta read a writer buddy’s manuscript, only for her to attempt to sabotage my own beta process to “get back at me” for negative criticisms. I’ve been the person more than a few acquaintances consistently come to for advice, only for them to disappear when I’m the one in need. I’ve given a free line-edit to a writer-acquaintance, only for her to send hate mail to my ask box. I’ve spent countless hours giving advice, critiques, and promos, only to be snubbed when the tables turn. And of course, I have had people try to warm up to me simply so they can go around social media dropping my name and claiming to be my PIC.

I realize at this point I’m whining, and making this post public is probably ill-advised. I’m just in a mood. When I do nice shit for people, I don’t expect to be rewarded, just appreciated. If I come around needing assistance, I think it’s fair to want the same kindness that I offered up in the first place. And at the very least, I expect loyalty.

Is there a point to this post? Not really. I just needed the release. Cliff and I have had long talks about this, and everything he’s said is right. As my platform continues to grow, my personal social circle will continue to shrink. I’m okay with that. I just wish these people would stop contacting me all sweet-like after they’ve knowingly given me the middle finger. It’s insulting.

Anywho, I apologize for this post. It’s super unprofessional, I know that. I guess I’m still adjusting to everything that comes with this platform, including the phonies.

Thanks to everyone who has supported me thus far and been in my corner no matter what.

<3 Mo

EDIT: For those who are unsure, my disappointment is directed toward writers I know in my personal life, not my fans/followers. I’m talking about former friends.

That is all. Carry on.

crystalparrot  asked:

Would you ever consider doing a tutorial how you draw legs? I'm in love with your style and looking at your stuff really helps me visualize how my characters legs look.

I’m assuming this is more geared towards my critter legs than the people legs, since… people legs are people legs. Let me know if I misunderstood!

I’m not sure I have a whole lot to say, but I can make a few notes about the types of things I usually draw the look from, but it’s a fairly simple point A-to-point B I think (though if anyone has specific questions, I’d be happy to answer)!

I use the same “lightning bolt” shape for basically all of my fantasy / anthro legs, because I’ve found this ends up being one of the more believable ways of melding bipedal plantigrade and quadrupedal digitigrade while still looking kind of animalish. This shape can be seen in the hind legs of most unguligrades very easily:

But you can see it in other tetrapods too, as long as you start at the hip and end at the toes:

But you might notice there’s different proportions to those, which have to do with the kind of locomotion the animal is adapted to. For example, the exaggeratedly long distance between ankle and toes in the deer, horse, ostrich are adaptations for a cursorial lifestyle. Playing with these proportions in your design influences how we may view a character. For example of my own, Marco (left) is a much more high-energy character than Alex (right), which I reflect in leg proportions, even with the same basic leg shape:

Those leg proportions also affect what the most natural default stance looks like. As in the above, the left has to have a much more dramatic bend to look natural than the right. A general rule of thumb is the higher the ankle, the more dramatic the resting bend in the knee. This isn’t a hard rule by any means, but it tends to help me make things look like they’re neither squatting nor about to fall over.

There’s a lot you can play with and I always like reading into things, so it may help to look up which muscles do what and what shapes come out of those. Look up plenty of critters and look at how their legs are set up, there’s a lot more base shapes to play with than my “lightning bolt”!

Anonymous asked: 

I really want to read a book that will help improve my writing. If you could only recommend one, which would you choose and why?

This is a great but difficult question! I am honestly torn between three. I’m trying to choose between them, but I just can’t! So you’ll have to bear with me… I’m suggesting three. You should definitely read all three! :)

Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott is one of the first books about writing I ever read, and to this day it is still one of the best. It has a lot of great advice, but it’s also just an interesting book about being a writer.

Word Painting: A Guide to Writing More Descriptively by Rebecca McClanahan is easily the best crash course in description you can find. I still find myself referring to her advice years after I read it, and sometimes I re-read parts of it for inspiration.

Reading Like a Writer: A Guide For People Who Love Books And For Those Who Want to Write Them by Francine Prose is great for writers who haven’t yet read widely, because she uses a lot of excerpts from novels and short stories as examples of different writing techniques. 

I hope you read them and enjoy them as much as I did!

Have a writing question? I’d love to hear from you! Please be sure to read my ask rules and master list first or your question will not be answered. :)

anonymous asked:

Hey so I have a question about polamory. I promise im not trying to be offensive. I'm trying to overcome my misconceptions. How is polyamory not about your primary partner being enough? If you're both on board, I wouldnt judge, but if my bf ever asked to open the relationship I would be deeply hurt because to me that means that we are broken. How is it different with poly? I'm sorry for being so ignorant I just really cant wrap my head around it. Thank you for taking time to read and answer.

Hiya! That’s okay, you’re not being offensive. My answer is going to be kind of complex, but I’m glad you asked. I am delighted when people want to learn!

First of all - your question does have a couple of pretty big assumptions in it. First, the idea that everyone who is polyamorous has a primary partner. A lot of poly people practice non-hierarchical polyamory, which means they don’t name a given partner as “primary” and don’t prioritize one person above the other at all times. Second, not every poly person starts from a vantage point of opening up a monogamous relationship. For example, I was single when I decided I was polyamorous. So the question of “is this about my primary partner not being enough?” wouldn’t have even been a question that made sense to ask, in my situation, because I didn’t have a partner at all (let alone a primary partner) when I started dating as a poly person.

But I’ll also go on to try to answer your question from the perspective of people who are coupled. I’m in two relationships now, one of 1+ year and one of 4+ years. When I’ve been seeking new relationships, the idea of my existing partner(s) not being “enough” isn’t even a way that I thought about things. The way I see things is rather that each person operates as an individual who can bring joy and fulfillment to the lives of others. Rather than starting with a space in my life that can be filled with love – and seeking people to fill it until it reaches, say, 100% – I see myself as already being at 100% (I am complete all on my own), and every person I connect with is also at 100% and thus we just add to each other’s lives when we join up. 

That being said, people do absolutely meet (or not meet) each other’s needs in relationships. A lot of poly people believe that it isn’t even possible for just one person to meet all of another person’s needs. From that perspective, you could say that one person isn’t “enough.” And some poly people even do frame things that way, but when they do, that isn’t inherently a negative – they use it as a way to view polyamory as something that enriches everyone’s lives, rather than a reflection on someone’s shortcomings. I think the idea that I can’t fulfill 100% of someone’s needs is a shortcoming only if I believe that it is (a) even possible to do, and (b) a responsibility that I have in a relationship that my value depends on. I don’t believe it’s my responsibility to fulfill all of someone’s needs; instead, I try frame things for myself (and to my partners) in terms of what I can offer, and if what I’m offering can meet enough of the needs they have that our relationship is worth their while, then we’re a good match!

So, when you say “if my bf ever asked to open the relationship I would be deeply hurt because to me that means that we are broken,” you are operating from the perspective of assuming that it’s possible for one person to meet all of another person’s needs; similarly important to note, you’re also operating from a perspective of assuming that “meeting unmet needs” is the only reason someone would seek out more partners. I can feel like all of my basic needs are met and still want new partners, because people are awesome, and I like having the freedom to explore what kind of relationship I’m going to have with someone without having constraints put on it by others. And that’s the main reason I’m poly.

The way I see it, your perspective on what makes a relationship broken or not-broken isn’t wrong, just like mine also isn’t. We just have different metrics on which we judge functionality & success of relationships.

I dunno if that helped clear anything up or not, haha. Please feel free to write again if you have more questions or want to clarify anything! Thanks again for writing!

anonymous asked:

Do you always ignore asks?

Maybe this just rubbed me the wrong way because of how tired I am from this past week but wow, ouch. The simple answer is no, I don’t. I’ve addressed my difficulty answering messages multiple times, even going so far as to make a video about it. I get a lot of asks and they are often very detailed and require a long and well thought out response. I get messages about anything from how to deal with pain without medication to how to deal with the mental toll that chronic pain takes and suicidal thoughts. I don’t just want to answer the easy questions, but I often don’t have the mental energy to produce the quality response I think these questions deserve. 

Dealing with chronic pain and procedures and surgeries is hard. I’m trying my best to keep up with this blog because it gives me a sense of purpose and people tell me that it helps them in some way. I read every question, and often think about them for days. I’m really trying, so I’m sorry if you have sent a thoughtful question or request, I am working hard on balancing my disability and work online. I appreciate every follower that takes the time and energy to send messages or reply to my posts. 

anonymous asked:

Social Competence: How do increase the density of insightful things I say in conversation? I want people to like talking to me, but I think I have a low signal-to-noise ratio. This mostly comes up at parties/social gatherings. I don't say anything because nothing I think of is interesting. Is there a way to improve SNR?

I hope you don’t mind if I don’t answer the object-level question (how to increase insight-density in a conversation) in favour of answering what I think is the meta-level question (how to be a pleasant conversationalist). [Also, all advice given here is aimed at the readership in general.]

I want to focus on the latter because signal-to-noise ratio is a terrible way to think about conversations.

This is because conversations have basically no “noise”. A lot of people with the not-geek not-autism thing hate when conversations go over things that don’t feel deep or insightful. Similarly, a lot of people who like clear systems would like to purge all the irregular verbs from their language. However, natural communication doesn’t work that way. Just as fully-regular constructed languages are hard to speak, conversations purged of “noise” are hard to have.

Firstly, because the “noise” serves an important purpose. It’s the bit of the conversation where people display the pattern of their own thoughts. When you’re aiming to be insightful, you give the other person what you think they want to hear, which tells them little about the kind of person you are. However, when you freely meander through conversation space, it lets people trace what pattern your thoughts generally follow.

Furthermore, the “noisy” parts of the conversation are generally the ones where personal information is shared. It’s where you talk about your weekend, your family, your hobbies, and all the other things that make you uniquely you. As I’ve said before, letting people see into you is what allows you to make close friends.

I think I’ll just quote HPMOR!Draco on it over and over again forever, because this is the first law of friendmaking:

Harry glanced away uncomfortably, then, with an effort, forced himself to look back at Draco. “Why are you telling me that? It seems sort of… private…”

Draco gave Harry a serious look. “One of my tutors once said that people form close friendships by knowing private things about each other, and the reason most people don’t make close friends is because they’re too embarrassed to share anything really important about themselves.” Draco turned his palms out invitingly. “Your turn?”

It doesn’t actually matter whether or not it’s embarrassment causing it. It could also be an unwillingness to seem inane. Whatever causes you to not show others who you are, that is an obstacle to becoming close to them. It’s not the signal-to-noise ratio that makes people feel connected to you, but actually feeling like they know you. 

Seeming insightful can get people to listen to you, but it won’t form a friendship on its own. It’ll be more like being a lecturer. People may seek you out to hear you speak about that particular topic, but they will only care a little about you-as-a-person. They may remember what you said on the philosophy of identity, but they won’t remember your birthday (which’ll be your fault for never telling them).

The second thing is that artificial attempts to increase the signal-to-noise ratio are generally self-defeating. If you’re trying to filter out all the uninteresting things you might say, you’ll often end up saying nothing at all. Far too many times, I’ve seen two nerds have a brief interaction, followed by both of them staring at each other trying to come up with things to say, and then drifting away from each other for the rest of the evening. Almost invariably, they wonder why the conversation died.

Conversations die when you hold yourself back from speaking. In my opinion, not wanting to seem boring is a particularly bad reason to have that hesitation. In the worst case scenario of being boring, the other person stops talking to you and drifts away. In all scenarios where you let a conversation die, the other person stops talking to you and drifts away.

However, even if you can keep the conversation by throwing out random bits of insight-porn, you will usually end up talking about the least insightful things out of the set of insightful things you could talk about. You’ll talk about the few things you manage to throw out as non-sequitur, which are generally not where the most stimulating interactions lie.

Most of the really interesting conversations I’ve had have been ones that evolved organically. The conversations you can have when both sides have a general feeling of understanding and common knowledge are usually far superior when to the ones where each person is trying to see how many layers of signalling they can be on.

So, in conclusion: Don’t hesitate to be inane. Say the things that are on your mind! Explore conversation-space! Avoid being frustrated by a conversation not being 10 lightbulbs a minute. The best conversations - and all close friendships - are built on background knowledge.

People who asked to be tagged/alerted in posts like this include: @cai10, @rhainelovespeople@whyarealltheuseramestaken​, @curlyhumility​, @amakthel, @lilithmeetsprometheus​, @dhominis​, @overlordtulip​, @bannableoffense​, @78nanosieverts​, @onthecareandfeedingofcatgirls​, @tempestwindblown​, @robustcornhusk​, @cafemachiavelli​, @apprenticebard​, @andhishorse​, @h3lldalg0​, and several others who were untaggable for some reason.

If you also want to be tagged in future social skills post, like this post [link] to let me know. If you don’t know about this series or this blogger, you can learn more here [other link].