i have a feeling i may not like this class very much


Notes for an Anon who asks, 

“ Hey Justin, thanks for your reply earlier. Just wanted to expand on my previous ask - do you have any tips for achieving colour harmony across an entire painting? I often feel like the objects in my paintings look disjointed, like I haven’t chosen the ‘right’ brown for trees or the ‘right’ green for grass when I use opaque brushes, this isn’t so much of an issue when I’m painting a single object or character but when painting an entire scene I find it very difficult to tie everything together. “

btw, this is COMPLETELY UNACADEMIC- I mean, parts may be “academic” but this is not meant to be a textbook. Terms are used VERY CASUALLY and the information is not at all comprehensive. This is an extremely brief superficial look at the term “Color Harmony”.

If you want ACTUAL color education, either take Sam Nielsen’s Schoolism class, or get James Gurney’s Color and Light book, or do both!!!!!

That said, I hope it helps some folks!

While studying can consist of pretty pens and notebooks, it can also be very difficult and can result in panic attacks, or other health disorders.

For everyone on tumblr who is a student, I just want you all to remember that sometimes studying isn’t a smooth process and sometimes it can be hard and may make you feel depressed. 

Sometimes you can study all the time and still fail the test or even the class. This does not make you a failure.

Sometimes you can be in a classroom where everyone can understand the material, except for you and you can feel like a complete idiot. This does not make you a failure.

Sometimes the professor that you have can be unorganized/rude/impatient, etc and you may not do well in the class due to the anxiety that they may cause. This does not make you a failure.

Sometimes, maybe sometimes, life gets in the way of studying and things don’t work out after all. This does not make you a failure.

I just wanted to remind you all that despite how much emphasis we place on success, failing in life does not make you a failure. Don’t let one bad grade, one class, or even one experience get you down and make you feel discouraged.

In the words of Thomas Edison, “ I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that didn’t work.”

teen wolf femslash week

¬ day four - polyamory

allison’s a girl who walks around in bright clothes no matter what the season and dyes her hair various shades of purple. erica’s the bad girl, always seen wearing a leather jacket, who likes to speed around town on her motorcycle. and kira? kira’s pretty normal, except for her strange obssession with the foxes in the forest next to her house.

these very different girls are paired together for a school project and they really don’t expect much joy out of it. however, after multiple meetings in cafes and libraries, the feelings of annoyance start to change and suddenly students are whispering about the strangest couple they’ve ever seen: the pastel girl with clothes of all colours, the bad girl who wears tight skirts and heels while kicking ass and the normal girl who sits in the back of class all by herself, as quiet as a mouse.

'You look like a tiger!'

Extremely Rude Classmate: Mary

Lisa: Mary’s friend

Jake: Lisa’s boyfriend and Mary’s friend.

*names have been changed

(Admin might want to tag warnings for self harm!)

While this may not be a story about a complete weaboo, I feel like it belongs on this blog. 

To set the scene, I go to a very small school. Like, 70 kids per grade. Pretty much all of the students have been going to it since preK, and I know everyone.

And there’s this girl. Many years ago in elementary school,  I bullied her because I was a little brat. I’ve always felt bad for it, even without vocalizing it. She looks like any average girl, stringy brown hair, slightly overweight,  too tight band tshirts. 

We don’t have any classes together except for seventh period math.At the beginning of last quarter, we were assigned new seats and I ended up way in the back in a table with just Mary and I. I didn’t have any problem with her, there are only two or three girls I know that I actively dislike, since I’m a big advocate for girl solidarity.

The first couple days were uneventful,  but then I came into class one day wearing a sweater that tended to slide off my shoulder.

Keep reading

It’s been a strange week. And I feel like I need to say this to clear my head.

I do realize that my platform is very small. And I am fully aware that what I experience is on a much, much smaller scale compared to what other people in the industry deal with. And I’m not sure what it is about that one hurtful comment out of so many nice ones that really sticks with you. Why that feeling is carried around for weeks, months, years afterwards. That may sound dramatic, but I am a person that feels a lot. I do have a lot of insecurities. I grew up getting made fun of. In elementary school I was happy. I was friends with everyone. It was very free. In second grade each person in my class was asked who their best friend was. Almost every person named me. My mom loves that story. But something changed for me from fifth grade to sixth grade. Elementary school to middle school. Suddenly none of my friends would sit with me at lunch. Just like that. First day of school, none of them spoke to me. Had something happened over the summer? Had I changed? I felt the same. It was only a few months. It became very obvious very quickly. I was uncool. I didn’t brush my hair. I had glasses. I wore all over sized t shirts with dragons on them. I didn’t wear makeup. My skin was bad.

I was frequently asked if I was in the wrong restroom. “Get out, this is the girls’ room.” “I am a girl…” I would say. I didn’t understand. How was I suddenly so different from my peers?

I felt like something was wrong with me. I became very uncomfortable in my own skin. I began to always let my hair hang in front of my face. So I could hide at all times. I hated walking through the halls. I hated gym glass where no one wanted to be my teammate. I hated group projects where no one wanted me in their group. I hated looking for a table that would accept me at lunch. I hated walking on to the bus wondering what sort of rude comment was going to be said to me that day. I looked forward to being home alone with my dog.

Partway through seventh grade, I started to get attention from a popular guy in my grade. I felt like my luck had finally changed. I felt like maybe I was becoming less of an outcast. One day after science class he and his friends handed me a note saying he liked me. He was theatrically going “Don’t show her!!! Oh my gosh!!! Don’t give her that!” They all laughed when I took the note. It was a joke. They were making fun of me. I could not get out of the room fast enough.

I fell for it again later that year with a different guy. I even went home and told my mom that someone liked me and that I couldn’t believe it. Later that week he called me over to his table at lunch. Where he and all of his friends laughed at me. I never told my mom that it was a trick. I was too embarrassed.

This same behavior from my classmates continued throughout all of middle school. I felt so isolated. In eighth grade in art class I was sitting at my assigned table. A kid walked over to me from another table and said “You smell weird.” And walked away. He went out of his way, left his table, to walk over to my table and tell me that. It’s almost impressive the lengths that people will go to to make you feel bad about yourself.

The summer before ninth grade I decided to make a change. I started to wear makeup. I wore fitted shirts and tighter jeans. I looked forward for school to start to show off my new look. I wasn’t afraid of the bus that first day of school. The bus pulled up. I walked on. I was greeted with “You look weird..” and “what’s on your face?” Nothing had changed. I could not escape my reputation of being uncool. I still had no one to sit with at lunch. Still picked last in gym class. Still laughed at in the halls. If anything, me trying just made it worse. My classmates felt even more inclined to put me in my place and keep me there. I cannot put into words the dread I felt stepping on to the bus every day after school. Knowing there was going to be an incident no matter how quietly I sat trying to disappear in my seat.

One day I decided that the kids on the bus were no longer going to get to me. No matter what they said, I would show no reaction. The usual remarks began. I looked straight ahead. They got louder. I looked straight ahead. I was upset, but not showing it. And I found power in that. All of a sudden I felt something land in my hair. It was gum. I didn’t see who threw the first piece, but it ended with everyone on the bus throwing their gum at me. I still sat there silently, staring ahead. Waiting for the bus to reach my stop. I had to walk past everyone who had just thrown their gum at me. I think they knew they had gone too far because one of them mumbled “sorry” to me as I walked past. My eyes were tearing up, but I didn’t want to give them the satisfaction. I walked straight off the bus, into my house, into the bathroom, and straight into the shower. My younger sister (7 or 8 at the time) was already home and knew something was wrong. She came to the bathroom door. “Are you okay?” I respond with “I know this is a strange request, but please don’t make me explain. Will you bring me the peanut butter from the kitchen and hand it to me?” She was kind and didn’t ask.

My clothes, my shoes, my backpack, my hair. All had these kids’ gum stuck to it. Did you ever get gum in your hair as a child? Do you know how hard it is to get out? I had six pieces of gum in my hair alone.

This followed me through multiple schools. It didn’t matter where I was. In tenth grade my family moved. I started a new school. I cried for weeks. Luckily, I met Brad and some other kids from the music department. I had someone to share a locker with. I was relieved for that. But I still got made fun of in the halls. Still picked last in gym class. Still no one wanted to be my partner for class projects. I was still laughed at in public. Still had people yell “faggot” out of their car windows at me. Still barked at by groups of high school guys at the grocery store.

These events have happened to me less and less over the past couple of years. I decided I was going to try and have a less friendly outer exterior. To try hard to not try. To appear as if I didn’t feel like crawling out of my skin. I chose a career where I have to be a little more visible. I can’t always hide. I have to put myself out there more than I usually would. But please realize that just because I am a little more visible, doesn’t mean I feel the hurtful words any less. You have no idea what someone has been through. And I will never understand why it’s so easy for people to say things they would never say to someone if they were sitting next to you. What is so dehumanizing about this tiny screen?

I’m not sure what it is about the internet where people no longer become people. And you just have to accept that you’re going to get the rude comments. And we are able to justify those comments by saying “well, it’s the internet. What did you expect?” How is that what we’ve come to expect? People feel comfortable commenting on photos of me writing all day saying “Damn, you used to be pretty. What the hell happened?” What compels someone to say that? Why is it that this is somehow appropriate? I am truly not trying to be overly sensitive (which I know I am prone to doing) it’s just something I will never come to terms with. Why would anyone feel the need to say something like that to anyone? Especially someone they’ve never met. You have no idea what someone has been through. You have no idea what they struggle with.

I’ve been dealing with my depression and my insecurities for most of my life. And I do realize that these are issues that I need to work on for myself and the people close to me. I’m in a really good place right now. I have people who love me. I’m in a really good, healthy relationship. A new group of friends who make me feel like I’m worth something and not afraid to be myself. (Who I know would have sat with me at lunch.) But as with anything, I have my ups and downs. It’s easy for me to be catapulted back to those days. To feel the gum in my hair. To feel the stinging embarrassment of someone pretending to like me for a laugh at my expense. One little comment, and I’m there. It still affects my friendships. It affects my self confidence. It affects my job. It affects my relationship. I still hate being shown in photos. I still hide behind my hair.

I’ve been accused of being “tissue paper” in the past, so I have no desire to perpetuate a fragile mentality. I’m not expecting anyone to feel pity for me or to feel bad for the experiences I’ve had. But maybe for people to understand that there is always more than the tiny window into someone’s life that you see on a screen. You don’t know me unless you know me. You don’t know anyone unless you know them. Everyone has dark corners of their mind. Every single person has their own set of issues and triggers. I’m not asking anyone to tiptoe, but to just be kind. To think before you speak. To realize the effect your words have on others.

There is this one incident I always think about from when I was growing up. In ninth grade. I was walking into my last class of the day. I was wearing a pair of jeans that were worn out and very ripped. I was the last one to walk into the room, everyone was already sitting. One of the guys in my class decided to call me out while everyone’s eyes were on me. “Wow, nice pants!” I sat down, defeated. A well liked girl in my grade got upset for me and said “Hey, I think they’re cool.” She gave the guy a dirty look and smiled at me. It was the only time anyone had ever stood up for me. I am still so grateful for her saying that. I will never forget it.

That is the kind of person I try to be. Someone who makes people feel their importance. Everyone is important. And everyone deserves to feel important. And everyone should be treated like they are important. You are all important. Your words are important and powerful. Please use that power wisely.

anonymous asked:

Is it common in people with BPD to be easily convinced to change their mind on an issue that they felt strongly about before hearing someone else's argument? As in, I have really strong feelings about an issue, that come from lots of research and the college classes I've been taking for my major- but as soon as I start talking to someone who feels differently about it, I start feeling like they're right and I'm totally wrong about it... Idk if this is a BPD thing or I'm just weak willed

A lot of people with BPD experience this! I think it’s because of a combination of symptoms. Our unstable identity and moods cause our views to shift often. Hyper-empathy can make us relate very strongly to others, and we may idealise them or devalue ourselves so much that we assume their opinion is more valuable than our own. It’s also scary for us to disagree with others, because many of us are very afraid of being abandoned or hated.

Practicing mindfulness might help you to cope with this problem.

Recommended reading: Reality statements for interpersonal effectiveness / Identity disturbance

- Exo

For not having had a guy I liked want to be my boyfriend for an unspeakable number of years now, these few words really sum up the only honeymoon stage I’ve been lucky enough to be in. It’s that stage where you have a crush that makes you excited to check your phone, giddy in the pit of your stomach, where you find yourself smiling like a dork at random points in a day, and maybe very well the reason you took crappy notes in class for a few weeks.  After meeting him you’re thinking- yes, all that hurt before has been worth it, this guy seems awesome and he’s already doing xyz different from the last idiot, and hey maybe I’ll have a date to the dance this year, maybe a date for my birthday, or hey maybe a dinner date instead of just getting asked for drinks on a Tuesday… However, this stage may also very well be how I set myself up to feel so much hurt when I find my time ending with someone I’ve cared about. I constantly try to tell myself to remain realistic and to not read into things too much, but I guess I also keep telling myself not to judge a new guy that comes along for the things a past one did. Yet, somehow, each little someone, keeps turning into a someone I used to know. hmph… Here’s to another year blowing out my candles (t-minus 17 days), wishing & hoping love isn’t still another number of years away, that someone like you is out there. 

Updated Commission Prices!

As of 10/15/15, my commission prices have changed!

(As you may or may not know, I just started college with a track in character animation. I’m working hard on doing well in all of my art classes, and do not currently have a job. While my tuition isn’t baring down on me, I’m hoping to earn a little bit of extra cash for myself so I can pay for my own groceries! :D )

Full Color/Full Body: $60-$75

(Each one of these takes upwards of 8 hours to complete.)

Full Color: $25-$45

Sketches: $10-$15

Thank you very much for your time! If you would like to discuss commissions with me, please feel free to send me an ask here.  Many of these prices are flexible! 

[And as always, reblogging this post is always a tremendous help!]