i hate you so much for leaving me for the second time

I hate when my parents say I don’t know what love is just because I’m young, they don’t know about the countless times I spent crying myself to sleep because you found someone better than me. I spent three years being used to you around and loving me that I forgot you could leave at any moment and when you did it left me broken and missing you everyday, it’s been a year and not a day goes by that I don’t hope you come back.
—  this has to be love

This ain’t enough
Might be too much
Maybe we’re just foolish now
Stuck here in love
What’s so hard to figure out
But we both know we care

Girl I don’t mind spending my time
Learning all the perfect ways
To hate you with love
I’ll be counting down the days
‘Till I don’t need you

Just don’t let nobody but me
Break your pretty heart to pieces
Give us time to see what we could be
Even if we choose to leave it
If I’m selfish, so be it
Cause I’d rather be here hurting with you
If I’m foolish
I’ll be it
Cause that’s just me
When it comes to you

Too close, too right
Too far for more
I don’t wanna wait too long
To kiss you tonight
Any second will be gone
And life won’t wait, for us

So terrified
Knowing I might lose
Who I’m supposed to be
To be by your side
Falling from this gravity
Would you choose just love or pride?

Just don’t let nobody but me
Break your pretty heart to pieces
Give us time to see what we could be
Even if we choose to leave it
If I’m selfish, so be it
Cause I’d rather be here hurting with you
And if I’m foolish
I’ll be it
Cause that’s just me

Before we say yes
Before we say no
Before we hold on
Or decide to let go
Let’s make it worth it
I hope you’re worth it
Cause I’ll be your fool
I’ll be your best friend
I’m crazy for you
This love is so reckless
But if we letting go
Just let me know

But just don’t let nobody but me
Break your pretty heart to pieces
Give us time to see what we could be
Even if we choose to leave it
If I’m selfish, so be it
Cause I’d rather be here hurting with you
If I’m foolish
I’ll be it
Cause that’s just me
When it comes to you

unwanted company | part one

part two

luke + reader
word count: 1024

writing masterlist | request/ask/feedback

summary: you and luke get into a fight and you leave but return to find out he’s already moved on

>>>

We hurled insults at each other, each trying our very best to knock the other down. 

“All you care about is the boys! What about me? Do I not matter? Is Mr. Big-Shot too cool and famous to hang out with the little people now?” I yelled at him.

“I care about the band! This is my job! If I didn’t care about it, you wouldn’t have a roof over your head, you wouldn’t have food on the table! So stop acting like you don’t get the attention you deserve because I’m working my ass off to provide for you!” He yelled back, face red with rage.

“If you hate it so much then stop! Or better yet, I’ll just leave! I can’t be with someone who doesn’t want to spend time with me.” My mouth acted before my brain could stop it. I was so filled with rage that I wasn’t aware of the consequences of my words.

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just-french-me-up  asked:

Okay prompt thing: Montparnasse has to squat the Triumvirate's apartment for some ungodly reason. No murder allowed but it comes close

“I am going to kill him!” Courfeyrac stomped his foot in annoyance and got a raised eyebrow from Combeferre on the couch and an annoyed sigh from Enjolras in his usual stool at the breakfast bar. He clung to a towel and change of clothes with one hand and held a bottle of shampoo in the other and frowned. “Do you know what he’s done this time?”

“Used all your soap?” Enjolras guessed, though he barely lifted his eyes from his computer screen and morning coffee.

Courf’s frown deepened, if that was possible. “No.”

“Stole your eyeliner?” Combeferre tried, and Courfeyrac shook his head.

“Not ever close. He kicked me out of the bathroom.” He held out the shampoo bottle, like that would somehow prove something about his point. “I have a class in an hour, and I need a shower before I leave, and he kicked me out!

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I’ve listed some things I wanted to tell you. Here are some.


First is, the last time I saw you, your haircut was horrible. Yes, that messy hair. Did you ever get a time to fix that or you just leave it that way every time you go out? But honestly, I like the fact that you don’t care what you look like in front of others, you’re the most apathetic person I know when it comes to what strangers think about you.


Second, I’ve always wanted your gray sweater the first time I saw it. I want to rip it out of your body and I don’t care if you appear topless. It suits you very much and I hate it. I think it suits me more, I think I’d look cool with your sweater on. And I also think that it would be sweet if I have something that’s yours inside my closet.


Third, I don’t like the way you walk. Damn, you look so boastful and mysterious at the same time – does this makes any sense? Well, anyway, try to chin down sometimes. I hate it when girls are looking at you. Some are probably thinking bad things about you, some are probably thinking good things about you. I don’t like them thinking. Okay?


Fourth, I like it when you curse. I like it when we curse! And then laugh loud like we didn’t do an impolite move. I love hearing you laugh even though you said mine is too loud, who cares? You’re spontaneous and you make me laugh hard, I love it.


Fifth, your hands are too soft for a guy. It once made me think that you’re gay, seriously, because what do you when you’re at home? Did you ever wash the dishes? Or just spending your day pressing keyboards? I bet the second one is the reason. Your hands are too soft, sometimes, I get conscious with mine when we hold, are my hands rough? Or soft too? But I’m sure yours are much softer.


Sixth, every time I look at your hand written letters here, I just look at it because I can’t read it. Your penmanship is so ugly, do you know that? You should go back on grade school and practice every letter. Okay, I was just joking on the part that I’m looking at it. Of course, I’m trying my best to read it though I already memorized some, you know how much I love your words.


Seventh, are you still busy? I’m being irritated with the fact that I don’t get chance to hang out with you every single day you don’t hit me up and say let us meet. What do you do on Sundays? Saturdays? I’m free at weekends. I miss you.


Eighth, are you still there? Would you ever come back again? I’d buy you ice cream.


Ninth, I’m waiting. You’re taking too long, it’s not funny anymore.


Tenth, I’m in love with you. This is bad.

—  // 9-29-’16, 10:18pm
The Surprise Visit

Part 3 (1,178 words)

Part [1] [2]

Considering I’ve had such a great response to the first two parts I’ve decided to post this early, thank you so much guys!

“You have a kid?” For the second time that day your breath caught in your throat as you stared down at him. You could almost see all the different emotions flickering in his eyes as he looked back at you. It was that moment that you realised, even after all these years, Dean still hated the thought of anyone else touching you. If only he knew the truth.

“Yeah, and if I don’t leave now she’s going to be wondering why her Mamma has picked her up from school.”

“Can I come with you?” Sam’s questioned surprised you but you agreed anyway and started to walk towards the exit as he said his goodbye to the others.

“Actually can you pick Maisie up for me? I’ll meet you at yours?” Your eyes narrowed at Amelia, you knew what she was doing, she was leaving you alone to answer all Sam’s questions. Despite that, you said yes and let her leave.

“Don’t look at me like that.” You rolled your eyes as you walked down the street, Sam following by your side.

"Sorry, I’m just surprised.” He let a laugh escape his lips as he tried to process the idea of you being a mother. “Why didn’t you tell me Y/N?” You thought about your answer before making your decision. Should you tell Dean before his brother? Probably, but this was Sam and he deserved to know too, hell he’d figure it out when he saw her anyway.

"She’s Dean’s.” His body stiffen at your words and his footsteps slowed down as he grabbed your arm.

“What?” His disbelief was clear in both his words and on his face. “I have a niece?” Tears welled in your eyes as you looked up at the younger Winchester. You had kept the secret for so long; you were relieved to finally let it out.

"Yeah Sammy, and she’s so perfect and she’s like him in so many ways, like the both of you-” Sam cut off your rambling by pulling you into a bone crushing hug. You sighed into his chest; even though you hadn’t said a lot you knew he understood everything. Why you left, why you kept it to yourself, why this was so hard for you. “Just let me tell Dean okay?” He nodded, knowing this was something you needed to do.

"So tell me about her?” Sam looked down at you with one of the warmest smiles you’d ever seen as you continued to walk.

"Well she’s Dean’s twin.” You laughed as you continued to tell him every little detail. It was true; her appearance was more like Dean’s than your own. A smile similar to his that could light up the whole room, a spray of freckles danced across her button nose and rounded checks and of course those remarkable green eyes. She’d developed similar traits to her father also; she was stubborn like him but the way she cared for people she loved screamed Dean. She was similar to Sam too, her love for books even at her age never failed to amaze you.

"Do you think she’ll like me?” You looked at Sam with a smirk, his shyness was adorable.

"She’ll love you.” A huge smile spread across his face at your words, you knew Mary would be beyond excited to meet more family. “So anyway, now we’re alone, how’s the family business?”

"Not good.” His face instantly dropped, you couldn’t imagine the things he’d had been through since you’d left and if you were honest you didn’t want to.

"But you’re alive, all of you.” You tried to lighten the now darken mood but it didn’t help.

"It’s draining and I’m sick of it Y/N. You know I’m actually jealous of you, you made it out, you have a life, that’s all I’ve ever wanted.” You’re heart swelled at his honesty. Sam had wanted to leave this way of life way before you had left it yourself, you’d often have long conversations about it late at night hidden behind closed doors. "When Dean came to get me from school, I told myself it would just be one last job, find Dad and go back to my life. But then Jess died and then I convinced myself one just one last hunt, then there was one more and then another. It’s a continuous cycle and I can’t get out.”

“Have you told Dean?” Sam snorted at your suggestion.

"You know what Dean’s like. Hunting’s in his blood, he wouldn’t take it well.” He looked down at the side walk as he talked.

"He’d understand Sam.” The younger Winchester simply shook his head and decided to ignore what you’d said. By now you’d already made it to Mary’s school and were patiently waiting.

"Mommy, mommy!” Your little girl ran up to you, the wind blowing her hair around her face. Sam watched her in awe as she stretched her arms open.

“Hey munchkin.” She smiled down at her, scooping her up and kissing her head. With the distraction of the Winchester brothers, you hadn’t realised how much you’d missed her.

“You’re right, she’s Dean’s double.” The words fell from Sam’s mouth before he really processed them; his eyes snapping up to meet yours, worrying if he said the wrong thing.

“Who’s that Mommy?” Mary’s innocent eyes locked with Sam’s.

“Honey, this is your Uncle Sam.” You continued to watch the pair stare at each other. You’d told Mary briefly about the brothers, never going into too much detail of why they weren’t there.

“You’re my Uncle Sammy?” A huge grin broke out on her face as she put the puzzle pieces together.

“Yeah that’s right kiddo.” The grin on his face matched hers as Mary leaned from your arms, reaching out for him. You laughed to yourself as the sight of Sam carrying her made her seem even smaller.

“It’s nice to meet ya.” She laid her head on his wide shoulder, her arms clinging around his neck and you could see there would be no problem with them getting along. The way Sam looked at her already showed the love he had for his niece and you knew instantly she had him wrapped around her little finger. Once Maisie had joined you, the four of you set off home, Mary never leaving Sam’s arms as the two little girls shared stories of their first day. You’d forget all about the up and coming conversation you needed to have with Dean until you saw him sitting on your door step.

“Who’s that?” Mary was the first to break the silence as she pointed to the stranger.

“Sam will you take the girls inside? Amelia should be in there.” You swallowed the lump in your throat, as he did as you asked, Dean’s eyes never leaving the little girl tucked up in Sam’s arms. You didn’t have to say anything for Dean to know what was already going on here. The moment he laid eyes on her, all the pieces had fallen together perfectly.

Dean knew.

Part Four

OUAT 6x13 Thoughts

Okay, so I’m feeling all the things.

First of all, did that moment where Rumple kills all the ogres by killing one remind anyone of anything?

Me it reminded of Regina saving part of her family and Robin and Marian from the snow monster. For a second I thought it’d be her.

Also, I felt bad for everyone in this episode. So much. I wanted to hug them all. My babies. I could see everything from all sides and my reaction to all of it was actually like Rumple’s “Oh, Bae”.

I hate it but I’m actually seeing how they could make Rumbelle work again. This might be the first time that I can actually see it since they met. And I really hate it. But here we are. I still wouldn’t date Rumple myself though, aside from that he’s not my type. I’m still firmly a member of the “once you’ve been abused by someone, you should leave that person effective immediately and never look back” club. A lesson passed down from my great grandma that I was taught both by my mother and grandmother. I was taught that if a man abuses you once (hits you or something similar) he will always do it. It’s in his nature. It’s the same with drinking, drugs, cheating. And you can’t change him, you don’t even have to try. He has to want to change and work at changing himself. But, you know. They make a compelling case for Rumbelle, I have to admit. I’m kind of surprised to be honest. I still stand by my real life value though.

And then there was the Bae thing. During that entire Beowulf scene I thought “This is so out of character for Bae, this is so out of character. I can’t reconcile this with the Bae we know at all.” And then I was like “Oh.” Plot twist of the century. But I still can’t reconcile it with Rumple killing that man that made him lick his boots because that Rumple as dark and hellbent on making everyone fear him. That would have been before this, right? And it’s just not the same attitude as the one he had here.

I kind of feel bad that Rumple is betraying Gideon. Over and over again. I know he’s bad, but he’s trusting his father. And going behind his back is only going to alienate him. Rumple really can’t let go of the manipulation, even when it’s for a good cause.

What else, Regina, my baby. God, I just wanted to hug her. She does an excellent sad, pouty face. Instant hug inducer, really. I’m surprised she gets the least hugs. Okay, I’m not, but still. I love how she just nipped Robin’s lying ass face in the bud. Like, that’s how you do it. Just kill the bullshit before it escalates. I thought it was interesting how Regina and Robin went from kissing to hostility. Like, from one moment to the next. And the clock is fixed! Or was it ever really broken? I love how Snowing was left out completely so we couldn’t even tell what was real and what wasn’t. Brilliant. I noticed the thing Shady pointed out about the last episode during the episode, where it was hard to tell who was really awake and who was asleep and what universe we were in, but I actually just brushed it off as me being too paranoid. Until Shady pointed it out. And here it reached another level.

I LOVED Zelena this episode. I love that she  STOLE the Queen from the Charmings. She was like, hold on, I’m not leaving without my reptilian sister. And the snake cage was just on top of her luggage. It was the most hilarious sight. And then Zelena was like, Regina, I’m bringing her to you. Your in-laws won’t be mad you stole yourself. Regina should really keep her, Zelena, I mean, but I have a feeling she won’t. And shouldn’t. I mean, she should, because Zelena’s awesome and would be a loyal ally and friend and Regina could use more of those. But at the same time there’s too much bad blood. Although Rumbelle seems to think there is no such thing. 

And I could definitely see the thing people have mentioned, how this Robin and Zelena could be a match made in heaven. Is it bad that I kind of love that Robin was playing Regina the whole time? And that she’s finally taking full responsibility for everything? I mean, she has before, but this was next level. I also love that she said it was a test to see if she could move on and she failed.

The Blue Fairy magic thing was interesting. I didn’t know stripping someone’s inherent magic like that could actually make them pass out or worse, but it makes sense. Since it’s a fundamental part of them. Also interesting that the sword that can kill the savior was forged by her. And that it can also kill the Queen.

Hook was his usual-lie with your morning coffee, sorry, rum and evening night cap-self. As always. If I had a dollar for every time this man lies or omits something, I’d probably be able to get my butt to Storytelling Con. I’m not even gonna comment on the other thing. I’ll say it again, you can’t build a real, lasting future on a lie. If it starts out fake it can’t be anything but that.

I was actually so happy about the snake bite! So happy! But um, shouldn’t it kill?

Also, Queenie is back! My baby! No why do I feel like her being back doesn’t bode well for Robin? Even though it seems like it does?

I don’t understand why Regina told Robin to stay away from that magic though. She said it was powerful and I thought Robin would end up unleashing an ogre on Storybrooke or something, but it wasn’t able to reverse the town line magic. But it was able to reverse the magic performed on the Queen. Why?

7

Happy Birthday to my Lanky Noodle Breadstick Boy, Luke!! 🎉🎂 You’ve turned into a hot piece of toast. I can’t believe you’re 19, it feels like just yesterday you were starting up your YouTube Chanel, Hemmo1996. At the time you probably didn’t know it, but it was going to be the beginning of something beautiful and unique. Now look at you, you’ve all come so far. Even though I “hate” this band so much (but too emotionally invested to leave) I want to thank you and the boys for everything you’ve done. You’re all working really hard to make us happy. Just remember to take a day off to relax, especially today. Enjoy your birthday my love 💕 Can’t wait to see you in a week.

Late Night Wanderings

@asktahliathings

Night had fallen in the Underground. You could only tell it was night because the crystals that usual shown so brightly were dimmed to a soft glow, casting the snowy forest in deep shadows. It was a time no one was to leave their beds save for the royal guard, only someone was out. Glass tilted his head back against the tree he was sitting against, spotting a few pinpricks of light shining faintly through the tree branches overhead.

He should go home. He wasn’t doing much of anything besides waiting for the cursed wing M!a to finally end. Glass hated being anywhere near Snowdin with them though. The big, blue and white appendages would be hard to explain if anyone happened to spot him with them. Call him paranoid because he was. Fat chance people were going to go peeking through the window of his room; it was on the second floor for crying out loud. He was probably just looking for an excuse to stay out at night.

Glass closed his eyes with a soft sigh. If he was caught in out past curfew again, he knew Undyne was going to have a fit. Well, she will when she stopped being a lazy fish ass. Heh, the great and noble captain was turning out to be quite the hypocrite these last few days.

A sudden noise nearby had Glass jolting upright, shoulders stiff and eyes flying wide open. Who was there? Glass swore he had teleported deep enough into the woods to avoid being found by a guard patrol.

i get annoyed really easily, it's bad

Michael would probably annoy you until you couldn’t take it anymore, it’d be his favorite game. Of course there would be days where he wouldn’t feel like that and he’d be calmer. But when he would be his usual self he would be so needy and he would not stop talking, no matter how many times you’d tell him to stop because you wanted to watch a movie. Honestly, he could annoy you so much that sometimes you’d start an argument, but Michael would just pout and tell you how he’s only enjoying the time you guys spend together because he knows how precious those minutes are and you’d finally give up, “I don’t hate you, but sometimes you annoy me a lot.” He’d smirk and say something like, “It’s a good thing you don’t hate because I’m not leaving for the next two hours, at least, and I’m ready to get you really annoyed.” You’d sigh and try to stay calm, but a smile would be on your lips. “Don’t try too hard, you happen to be pretty good,” you’d reply, “you should learn to be good at making me food now, since you’re so good at annoying me.” “Seems too difficult for Mikey.”

One gross, exhausting trend that I would absolutely love to see die out in het romances immediately–

(This post brought to you by me reading “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been” by Joyce Carol Oates, which is basically about a serial rapist/killer verbally harassing and frightening a 15 year old girl into leaving her house and coming with him to be raped and murdered. When I finished reading it, I was like, Well, that was GODAWFUL HARROWING AND HORRIBLE AND THE WORST I HATE THE WORLD and then I was also like, And not so unlike many a dashing romcom hero??? Noooo!)

That thing where the guy is always like, “You want to go out with me!” or “We’re meant to be together!” or “You know you like me!” and the girl says no, often repeatedly, often distressed or annoyed about it, and the guy not for one second taking that “no” to mean anything. And the audience not being expected to believe that “no” either, but just to chuckle along and think, Oh, silly little woman, how wrong you are!

Maybe we should call this phenomenon Mr. Collins-ing:

"You are too hasty, sir,” she cried. “You forget that I have made no answer. Let me do it without further loss of time. Accept my thanks for the compliment you are paying me. I am very sensible of the honour of your proposals, but it is impossible for me to do otherwise than to decline them.”

“I am not now to learn,” replied Mr. Collins, with a formal wave of the hand, “that it is usual with young ladies to reject the addresses of the man whom they secretly mean to accept, when he first applies for their favour; and that sometimes the refusal is repeated a second, or even a third time. I am therefore by no means discouraged by what you have just said, and shall hope to lead you to the altar ere long.”

Like, I happened upon The Nanny Diaries on tv the other day – The Nanny Diaries, of all innocuous things! – and watched it for awhile, and sure enough, there was ol’ Captain America, pressuring ScarJo into going out with him despite her protesting repeatedly that she didn’t think it was a good idea. And it’s so clear that we are supposed to think Captain America is a super dream boat in this movie! For another recent example, I really liked the film Trainwreck, but when Bill Hader’s character basically decided Amy Schumer’s character liked him and they were going out despite her protesting repeatedly, I was just like, “Aw man, movie; why you gotta play me like this?” It was really a really disappointing scene even though overall, I enjoyed them a lot as an on-screen couple.

And, like, unfortunately this trend is so pervasive that I’m sure there are tons of ships I love that have employed this exact sort of exchange. (Just off the top of my head: Han/Leia! Spike/Buffy! Lola/Narcisse!) I’ve probably even written scenes like that before. But the older I get, the more I am just so entirely sick of it, and of everyone in society being conditioned to think that the “no”s uttered by girls and women just mean “Yes, I secretly like you; keep bugging me!”

And, like, I like ships where that is actually the case, because it can be such a fun entertaining dynamic, but often it is accompanied by such problematic undertones that it’s hard not to become critical of the trend unless it’s pulled off very well.

And I think it would be much more bearable, in a way, if this trope didn’t maintain such a double standard. Because when do we ever get to see female characters be the ones who are like, “You like me; we would be good together; you know you want me!” with her actually being portrayed as a viable love interest who’s right rather than some sort of pathetic, desperate crazy lady? I would love to see more stories where women are actually allowed to take initiative rather than always being ~reluctantly pursued by the man who is right about everything~.

And when I ask that about female characters taking on this role, I would honestly like to know! I’m sure there are some instances in fiction somewhere where this dynamic is reversed, though I can’t think of very many off the top of my head. What might some of them be?

"Why we ship Mystrade": an over-stated argument

We ship it because it makes us happy. We don’t care how much screen time they have (approx. 3 seconds in s3e3) or what evidence we have to it (Greg in s2e2: “I don’t always do what your brother tells me.” He glances away and to the left, sipping his beer.)

It’s meta and headcanons, exactly what all other non-canon Sherlock ships are made of.

We ship it because it’s fun for us to do so. We aren’t denouncing anyone else. We are mostly quiet shippers. We stay quiet so we don’t get hate from the other ships.

But.

As I learned today on YouTube, people (this person has specifically stated that they are a Johnlocker) are willing to put down anything that isn’t their ship, even if it has NO effect on it at all. They are saying that they “don’t get Mycroft/Lestrade”. You don’t have to. You can simply just not ship it and be a happy person, dreaming about Sherlock and John. You can do that.

But don’t come to me and call my ship out and, for no reason other than boredom or the fact that you’re just a jerk, point out how little evidence we have to our ship. Because where you like to think about John and Sherlock being happy, retired in Sussex with their bees, I like to think about Greg and Mycroft being happy, growing old together, Greg owning a bakery after he retires from the Yard.

So. If you come and question my ship for no reason, I will just ignore you. Because Mystrade makes me happy. And I’m not going to let someone on the fucking internet take that from me, nor am I going to retaliate by dissing your ship. I’m not a shitstain.

:)