i hate you shaw!

Could you just imagine if 80% of America’s favorite white fuckboys on TV got killed off by stray bullets ??


Happy birthday you adorable human being


Is that good enough for you?

  • Me: This fanvid I watched one time made me cry more than I have cried in my entire life
  • Me: By the end of the day I was dehydrated from all the tears
  • Me: I thought I was going to die
  • Me: ...
  • Me: I'm gonna watch it again
ghost in the machine au: playing chicken

[start at the beginning]

  • it’s shaw who leads the charge to the diner
  • harper doesn’t understand how her tiny legs can move that goddamn fast
  • dani, of course, is forever suffering
  • she has to stop harper from yanking shaw back in front of traffic
  • “i thought we /wanted/ her to be alive”
  • “yeah, but I want you in one piece too. i don’t want anything to happen on…accident”
  • “you seriously think she’s carrying? it’s just pancakes”
  • “it’s /shaw/”
  • “shit you’re right. move those little legs, silva!”
  • they catch up to shaw inside the diner, already glaring at her cup of coffee and tapping her finger impatiently on the table
  • she’s restless, waiting for something
  • for someone
  • dani and harper slide in across from her
  • “you were uh. pretty lucky going across the street there. if that light hadn’t have turned red…” harper trails off
  • waits
  • shaw shrugs, still antsy and distracted
  • “don’t gotta worry about that stuff anymore”
  • dani frowns a bit. “the machine can’t protect you from everything, shaw”
  • shaw rolls her eyes before continuing to search the restaurant
  • her leg’s jumping under the table now, her breathing is a little quicker
  • “shaw? you okay?”
  • she starts to fiddle with her silverware a bit. unravels the napkin and starts bending the knife a little
  • “this is taking forever”
  • “unless you want raw pancake batter, you’re gonna have to wait more than five minutes–”
  • shaw’s twisting around in her seat now, knife gripped tightly in her hand
  • this is the closest they’ve ever seen shaw to anxious and they’re not huge fans so far
  • dani’s the first to intervene: “shaw. why don’t you set the knife down. you can help us decide what to order”
  • harper slides down in her seat a little. “or maybe you could sit down and try to look a little less…you. that would work too”
  • “enough, harper” dani mutters under her breath
  • “is this the nypd’s version of a crisis negotiation? because if so, it kinda sucks” shaw cuts in
  • “we just want to talk, shaw”
  • “and not get kicked out or arrested in the process. ideally”
  • “/harper/”
  • shaw rolls her shoulders. “if i told you, you’d think i was–”
  • root hated that word
  • “–you wouldn’t believe me.” shaw finishes, still toying with the knife
  • harper raises an eyebrow. “shaw. god is a woman-aligned asi who I now get texts and the occasional book recommendation from. try me”
  • shaw flicks her eyes around the room for the thousandth time
  • “i guess we’re about to see who’s better at playing chicken”
  • and then dani and harper watch in horror as shaw stabs herself in the hand five times in rapid succession
  • except
  • there’s no blood
  • the room is ice cold
  • and the knife is completely destroyed
  • shaw wriggles her undamaged hand in front of their faces
  • looks over to the empty space next to her
  • “i win”
  • harper blinks. slides out of the booth
  • “i’m gonna smoke about. four bowls. and then we’re gonna talk about–” she gestures in shaw’s general direction “–all of that”
  • dani just tosses her a lighter and lays her head on the table
  • shaw just looks smug
  • little shit
ai au: human interaction

part one | part two | part three | picnic

content warning: thinly veiled metaphors for dysphoria

  • they spend a lot of time cooped up indoors doing cool science shit or sparring
  • root would be down for leaving the lab, but shaw’s super paranoid
  • crowds make her nervous. she hates when people stare at her. like they know shes not a human.
  • which like, shouldnt matter anyway?
    because humans are dumb, she’s more than a human, shes better than they’ll ever be–
  • their opinions shouldnt even matter
  • but they do
  • root tells her it shouldnt matter. “who cares if we pass as human or not, sweetie? it’s not like they can actually hurt us”
  • shaw gets quiet
  • “…sameen?”
  • shaw shrugs.
  • “no! no dont brush this off. if this is important to you, then it’s important to me! i’d never make you do anything that makes you uncomfortable”, root hurriedly exclaims
  • “i know that they cant hurt us. my bones are titanium alloys. my skin is kevlar.” shaw begins haltingly, “but when i have to make trips to harold, sometimes people try to talk to me. and i answer, of course. because that’s what you’re supposed to do.”
  • bitterly, she adds “and when i speak, sometimes…”
  • root scoots a little closer. her pressure against shaw’s side is reassuring.
  • “sometimes they just look at me. like they know. and i hate it. was i too lyrical or too stiff? was my vocabulary too simple or too complex? was it my tone, my pitch?”
  • shaw grips the edge of the bench. the steel begins to give under the pressure. “and it shouldnt even matter, root. it shouldnt. who gives a shit if im an ai or not, and who gives a shit that they know? it shouldnt matter, and it shouldnt bother me, BUT IT DOES. and i hate it.”
  • “i hate that it gets in the way of me living, root. i know you. i know you’re sick of being trapped in here with me. you want to see the world–”
  • root opens her mouth to protest
  • “–and dont even try, root. you know you cant lie to me.”
  • “i hate that i cant give that to you” shaw whispers.
  • root’s ears catch it, of course.
  • “i’ll always take what you can give me. i’d never ask you for anything else, sameen”, root says gently.
  • shaw shrugs her off after a few minutes of silence. she walks back to her work station. she’s going to build rifle that shoot knives semi auto or something.
  • just to distract herself.
  • root quietly goes back to her work as well.
  • she just barely hears the “thank you” over the steady metallic clinks.
I'm not sure how this happened...




The blizzard was going to be hitting New York that evening, so Shaw was glad to have the day off. Now she could just relax and watch her favorite show in peace…without interruption…it was going to be the best day ev—

And then her phone buzzed.

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