i hate u guys lmao

Dead cold hands.

2

reenacting k-drama with Haechan and Winwin 😂😂

light

/līt/

noun

  1. you carry stars in your pockets like you have stretched the universe tight around your soul. when i fall, they spill out of your pockets as you try to help me up and i spend years in my head trying to make constellations until my eyes hurt. when i close them, you are still there.
  2. your touch is as soft as the feathers on my back; i sit on the bathroom counter and daydream even though it’s night. you tape the gaps in my wings, and i try to ignore the way your fingers burn. 
  3. you kiss me like you have forever and a day and i only have a few hours. i am a dripping candle and you the sun, so bright i can hardly bear to look at you, but you kiss me again and i forget every warning my father told me.  
  4. there is no happily ever after; there is only you, with fire in your veins and hands dusted with the ashes of what is left of me.

I go to Tim Hortons and I fucking left the house w bed head like I look so bad and I’m ordering a cookie w an ice coffee and I decided to treat myself and add another cookie while the guy was doing my order and he was about to give it to me for free and I’m like looking at him like “charge me”
And he’s like u want me to charge u when I’m giving it for free and I’m like “yes” LIKE LMAO @ men wow I hate it when u guys do that typa shit 😩🙄

Studying Fine Arts

I’m going to talk about this from my experience, right now I’m in the 4th year of my degree of Fine Arts (I study in Barcelona)

okay, so let’s get this straight. All the things I post on my instagram art account or here (all the digital illustrations, cartoonish sketches and such) have NOTHING to do with the degree I’m studying. I do all those illustrations bc I love doing them, I learned to develop my own style by myself, by looking at other artists I found here on tumblr or deviantart or instagram, by practising everyday (bc I love doing so and I want to get better at it!) looking for tutorials, watching animated movies, anything that’d help me improve it.

I don’t do illustration in Fine Arts, the closest I’ve had to that was this one subject I did for like 3-4 months and I barely learned anything new, they just showed us some references (which, I found pretty lame and not helpful at all) and then we had to make a graphic novel all by ourselves with very very little help (if you follow me on insta you might’ve seen something from it but I haven’t posted it anywhere bc the story itself is pretty lame lmao)

And then we had an animation class, this was probably the best and only subject that I liked and I learned something I didn’t know before. The teacher was super nice and really good (tbh my fav teacher so far lmao) 

Okay, so what is fine arts about? to put it in a nice way, it’s the way to find yourself and realize what things you want to do in life and what things are not for you, like, the good thing of this degree is that you have to do EVERYTHING. Photography, Drawing, Painting, Sculpture, Impressed art, Performances… these are like some of the MAIN “art groups”, then there are like many subgroups for each like, live drawing class (this one was good to practise anatomy and honestly it really helped me to draw proportions right omg), movement drawing (v v v good one aswell), wood sculpture, clay, marble I think? I don’t know, there were maaaaaaaaany others which I didn’t do bc they were optional. The thing I didn’t like is that you can’t specialize until 3rd year (there are common subjects and optional ones but during the 1st and 2nd year all of them are common which means you have to take all the classes u like it or not lmao) I think that we’re all pretty sure of the things we’re capable of doing and truly like doing by the end of the first year, we don’t need another year of us doing things that don’t enjoy doing and won’t be helpful in a future.

I realized I wasn’t born to sculpt things. I didn’t need to spend 2 years of taking sculpting class lmao

There was a point where I wanted to drop off, I wasn’t happy going to class, it made me really sad and I was 0 motivated to go. I didn’t like the teachers, most of them, instead of motivate their students to improve and say things in a nicely way, did the complete opposite. And it’s not “oh just because they don’t agree with you it means they’re bad”, but there are many ways to say things and some of them were very rude and harsh and none of us deserves to be treated like that, some students even left classes crying (I, instead, cried at home lmao)

I know that you can’t please everyone, not everyone will like what you do and think the same way you do and definitely will have different opinions, and I respect that, so I want to be respected aswell. But I had this one teacher who legit told me “illustration isn’t art”. And this other student tried to make him understand that he wasn’t right, or that she had a DIFFERENT opinion on the topic but that didn’t change anything.

Anyway, every subject would’ve been different if I had another teacher, obviously. Would it have been better? Probably. I’m not saying Fine Arts is awful, I’m saying studying fine arts, in barcelona, for me was awful. Because it’s not what I expected at all.

WELL THAT WAS ONE LONG ASS RANT lmao, but it’s all I had to say.

Now that I’m in last year (THANK GOD) I’m already looking for some animation schools, I wanna focus on animation/character design, illustrations and everything that involves what i truly love and want to do in my life. 

Let’s just say that Fine Arts was for me like a start off, like some time to decide what I wanted to do, like a “base” so now I can specialize in what I want to do for a living (aka animation)