Clay… H e l m e t. Your name does not belong on this list. But you need to be here if I’m going to tell my story. If I’m going to explain why I did what I did. Because you aren’t every other guy. You’re different. You’re good. And kind. And decent. And I didn’t deserve to be with someone like you. I never would. I would’ve ruined you.
Someday I’ll explain it to you, why they came, why they won’t ever go away. But I’ll tell you how I survive it. I make a list in my head, of all the good things I’ve seen someone do. Every little thing I can remember. It’s like a game. I do it over and over. Gets a little tedious after all these years, but… there are much worse games to play.
“I once lived in a place where the opinion of others mattered. It
suffocated me, nearly broke me. So you’ll understand me, Feyre, when I
say that I know what you feel, and I know what they tried to do to you,
and that with enough courage, you can say to hell with a reputation. You
do what you love, what you need”
To Harry’s intense embarrassment, he suddenly realized that Dumbledore’s bright blue eyes looked rather watery, and stared hastily at his own knee. When Dumbledore spoke, however, his voice was quite steady. “I am very touched, Harry.”