i hate it more every time i look at it



17-18. clarke griffin & raven reyes (the 100)

“I used to be picked first for everything. Earth skills, zero-g mech course. First… every time. So, how the hell did I end up here?”
“Hey, Raven? I’d pick you first.”

Good Kid/Troublemaker AUs
  • You’re a rebel by accident cause you get really animated when you talk and hit people in the face leading to fights. Now you just roll with it. I know the truth though.
  • Totally saw you spray paint the principals car and you’ll have to buy me dinner to keep me quiet.
  • I pretty much live in detention and you’re a straight A student here on your first offense. Wanna add another and skip detention with me?
  • Every time I get in a fight you patch me up but now I’m the one patching you up after your tripped on thin air.
  • I’m a super tough punk who hates authority. Your parents are cops who have met me more than once but I like you a lot.
  • Me and my buddies vandalized your backyard trampling your mini garden in the process. Now I feel really shitty cause you’re really upset about this. Look I’ll help fix it okay just stop with the sad faces.
  • Accidentally knocked you out when you got caught in the middle of a fist fight between me and this other kid during school. So I sat with you in the nurses office. Shut up! Punks like me have consciouses to you know!
  • You’re always picking fights and I’m the one who has to use my charm and way with words to stop them from getting out of hand.
  • You’re a police officer and I’m constantly in and out of holding/jail and we get to know each other well so sometimes you give me my favorite treats when no ones looking.
  • I’m always fighting and getting in trouble at school so people avoid me. You frequent the small ice cream shop my parents own and know how kind I am to children and elderly people but I don’t realize this.
  • You give me a piggy back ride (or ride home) after I got out of a brutal fight and can barely stand.
  • I brought my new kitten to school hold her please while I kick this guys ass. 
  • Punks can get scared of thunder storms to
When we lose a gift...

I just reblogged quite a few gifs from jamesandclairefraser.  I want you all to look at them.  The quality. The S1 to S2 parallels.  The fact that Jess made every single one of those, is something you all need to reflect on.  Because making gifs isn’t easy.  It takes a lot of work and to get the quality and timing just right, takes effort.  

That gift is gone.  Because of the constant anon hate, screen capping, tattling, chastising, mockery….we’ve lost a very great talent from this fandom.  

And what saddens me more than anything is that this happened from within. People who say they ship but feel the need to send Jess hate because you don’t like how she ships.  And if it wasn’t enough to have happened here, it was taken to twitter.  And tattled on to the great solver of problems, William Shatner.  Well done. You took your problems to his shipper hating assistant, Paul.  Time to wake up. Shatner is an 85 year old man, who doesn’t sit on TW that long.  You have to realize you aren’t gaining his favour, but conversing with his pathological lying (which was proven in court) assistant. Imagine.  The bona fide star you are hell bent on using to get close to Sam, isn’t really him.

I’m upset.  I’m angry.  I’m appalled.  And to what end is all of this hate? Because you fear Sam and Cait aren’t together?  Because if they are somehow shippers are bothering them?  Sam has engaged with shipper tweets and encouraged them.  You can throw that argument away.  It doesn’t work any more.  Are you afraid they might leave Social Media?  Judas, let them go.  Plenty of stars don’t have social media yet they manage to thrive and survive.  

Selfishness won the day, I’m sorry to say.  And because of that, we lost a creative gift.  I hope you all miss her.  I know I will.

Then all of a sudden; I realized the only thing I wanted to look at was his dark brown eyes.
I understood why I had started to smile more, it was because my mind had always seemed to drift back to him; his laugh, the words he’s said, his smile.
I finally noticed I subconsciously brush my hair back every so often just because he said I looked so beautiful every time I did it.
I recognized that I’d compare almost everyone I met to him; because no one shared the same handsome face as him, no one possessed his curly, raven colored hair.
Then I finally saw the way he looked at me,
his eyes grew soft and the tips of his lips would curl up in a soft, shy smile;
and in that moment,
I knew that he absolutely felt the same way.
—  a.a.
but where did we go wrong? m.k.j.
the signs about their bias
  • aries: they must be protected i will beat anyone's ass that dare say shit about them i swear rn
  • taurus: EVERYONE!!! LOOK AT MY CHILD!!! i love them they are my baby omg
  • gemini: OMG I HATE THEMMM THEY ARE THE UGLIESTTTT send me more pics i love them kms
  • cancer: I AM SCREAMINGGGGGG i love them so much i am shedding tears agjhcjobjkhbj
  • leo: how cute would we look together tho like... we'd be so cute i need them in my life asap
  • virgo: why yes ik their birthday their real name their hometown their blood type their debut date and time their friends from high school their home address their mothers maiden name
  • libra: *bias does something* AHHHHHHHHHHH *posts on social media* *calls up every person they know* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
  • scorpio: why are they so HOT why are they so PERFECT they make me wanna SIIIINNNNN
  • aquarius: *has hella merch and always wants more. probably writes or reads lots of fanfic too*
My contribution to the YOI fandom. For the anons who wanted sick Yuri K.

Yuri feels at home on the ice—it’s was the one thing he is absolutely sure of. With the Grand Prix right around the corner, every second of practice is crucial.

One more time. He needs to run through the routine again. There are still a lot of things that need work. He hears Victor’s frustrated sigh from across the arena, hears the music as it is started from the top.

Yuri begins to skate. His moves are wrong, his jumps too sloppy. He falls behind the music and catching up is an impossibility. Victor is waving frantically at him from across the rink, but if Yuri doesn’t nail this now, he’ll never be ready for the Grand Prix.

He doesn’t feel good, and not just about his performance. His body is on fire, his limbs heavy and achy. His head is filled with such a dense fog that it’s a wonder he ever managed to make it out on the ice in the first place.

He does a triple axel, and this time his stomach leaps up with him. He hadn’t eaten that morning, his appetite completely gone in the wake of illness, but it takes everything he has to swallow back a rush of bitter tasting saliva. The nausea catches him off guard—he wipes out on the ice, skidding to a stop on his back.

He doesn’t get up. He can’t.

Victor is running to him, his worries inquisitions turning into frantic yelling.

Yuri can only watch as Victor runs to him, slipping in his shoes and coming to a stop at the edge of the rink. Yuri’s stomach still feels wrong, unpleasant.

He’s going to throw up. He can feel it steadily rising up his esophagus, his mouth flooding with acidic saliva.

Victor asks him if he’s okay and helps him sit up to lean against the wall. Yuri wants to answer him, but opening his mouth would be a terrible idea. He wonders vaguely if he has the flu—it would explain why he suddenly feels so miserable.

“Yuri, talk to me—”

A deep, rumbling belch pierces the air. It takes only another few seconds of nauseous swaying before Yuri turns to the side, away from Victor, a thin stream of watery vomit spurting from between his lips.

Victor begins to panic, and nothing Yuri can do can possibly fix that, especially when he continues to gag wetly over the ice, water and bile leaving his body in a flourish.

His stomach empties quickly, strings of spittle and sick clinging to the edge of his lips as he tries to level out his breathing. He feels marginally better, though his vomit-tinged shirt has seen better days.

Victor’s all over him now, bombarding him with questions, and Yuri can only nod; yes, he knew he was sick, he wants to go home, he promises to confide in Victor next time.

It’s moments like this—not necessarily when he’s sick, but when he has a caring boyfriend that is willing to do anything for him—that Yuri knows he wouldn’t change his life for anything.

I know you don’t love me. I don’t expect you to. And I mean it – I didn’t really like you. In fact, I hated you. It was your fault I felt so awful all the time. Do you know what it’s like to love someone and hate them as well? It was like being torn in two, Harry, I couldn’t stand it. Every time I saw you I loved you and hated you just a little bit more.”

Harry opened his mouth, frowned, and then closed it again. He had very little idea how Draco had felt – he wasn’t a Veela, he didn’t have the same feelings as Draco did. He’d been perfectly content to hate the little git. Now though. Now… “You didn’t like me? Does that mean you do now?”

Draco smirked, looking more like himself again. “You’re improving.
—  In His Nature by create_serenity

1034) I often hate meeting new people. Every time they assume I’m straight and it comes up and I have to come out again. And again. Every time it gets more annoying. “Hey look at her!” No thanks I’m more interested in him. “That’s one of the perks of working here, lots of gorgeous girls.” That’s great, call me when you see a gorgeous guy. “You should shave your beard so girls will want to kiss you.” Nope, I’m growing it out so guys will. “Did I mention Sally has an eye on you?” Did I mention that I’m extremely homosexual? Seriously, do I need a sign or something? Maybe I’ll just start wearing a name tag that says hello I’m gay….

What He Was Doing There

Part 2 of What Is He Doing Here

It had been a couple weeks since Joe had left my speechless in Caspar’s bedroom during the housewarming party, and things had been…interesting.

Joe and I seemed to be crossing paths more often, and every time I saw him the feeling of his lips on mine, my back pressed against the door, his touch across my skin, it all spread a warmth through my body.

I hated him for it.

I was just walking into Caspar’s building, looking down at my phone as I waited for the elevator when I heard someone walk up next to me.

“Hello, love.” Joe’s voice drawled out while he stood there, his hands in his pockets, a smirk on his gorgeous face.

Gorgeous? No, Y/N. He’s a jerk. I shook my head mentally, and glared at the body next to me.


“Oh, don’t be like that.” He moved closer, our arms touching. “Although,” Joe’s head moved next to my ear. “You look very hot when you’re mad.”

My mouth dropped open just as the elevator doors opened, and I tried to think of something to say back to him, but was unable to. I huffed as Joe simply raised an eyebrow at me from his place in the elevator, clearly waiting for me to enter.

For a moment I debated simply taking the stairs, before walking into the elevator, determined to not let him get to me.

“I wonder why Caspar remains friends with you.”

“Because I’m awesome.”


“There’s also my body.”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

“Everything, considering you’re staring at it right now.”

My eyes snapped back to the doors in front of us, our reflections distorted in the metal. I could feel my cheeks flush as I realized that I had been admiring his body, but he was the asshole wearing a t-shirt and skinny jeans that showed off his fit body.

Dammit, Y/N. I scolded myself. Don’t let him get to you.

I jumped at the feeling of fingers brushing against my cheek, and my eyes clashed with Joe’s as I stared into them. He had moved to stand in front of me, only inches away.

“You should blush more, it’s a great colour on you.” Joe’s hand moved from my cheek to around my neck, drawing me closer.

The next thing I knew, we were kissing again. My hands found their way around his back, his t-shirt grasped in my first, his other hand coming up to cup my face as he moved me backwards. I gasped as my back his the elevator wall, which only allowed him to deepen the kiss.

The elevator door dinging made us jump apart, both panting heavily.

“Our floor.” Was all I could mumble, my eyes still locked onto Joe’s.

“We should go, before Caspar begins to wonder.” Joe’s eyes searched mine, what they were looking for, I wasn’t sure.

“Right. We should.” I repeated, but neither of us moved. Joe’s arm reached out and hit the button to reopen the doors as the attempted to close, but still we remained where we were.

A minute later, his phone let out a beep, and it seemed to break our trance. I looked down as Joe reached into his pocket to pull out his phone.

“Caspar.” He moved the phone to show me our friend’s name. Then he turned and walked out of the elevator. I watched him go before I moved quickly, just before the doors closed, and caught his arm before he reached Caspar’s door.

“Wait, Joe.” We both stopped there in the hallway, and I bit my lip, suddenly nervous. I think that was the first time I had said his name without any sarcasm or anger behind it. “We…can we talk about this?” I gestured between us, unable to put it into words.

“What do you want to talk about?” His eyes moved to the hand on his arm, but he didn’t move to displace it.


“Don’t what?”

“Be an ass, like you always are.”

“Well, what else am I supposed to do? You hate me!”

“I don’t hate you!”

“You sure as hell don’t like me.”

“I don’t like how much of a prick you are to me!” I crossed my arms, glaring at him.

“I like pissing you off!”


“Because I like you!” Joe’s words made me take a step back, my mouth once again dropping open.


He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I like you, Y/N. I have since Caspar first introduced us. But I messed up, and acted like an ass, and then you got all adorable, flustered and mad at me. From then on, I figured it was just easier to keep the act up.”

“Why are men such idiots?” I asked, a small smile forming on my lips.

Joe shrugged his shoulders, also smiling now. “It’s a natural gift I think.” He moved in closer, grabbing my hand with his to intertwine our fingers together. “Can I kiss you again? Because that one in the elevator was probably in my top three.”

I rolled my eyes, clearly this side of Joe was never going away. “Only top three?” I smirked at him. “Clearly I need to work harder.” I tugged him forward so our lips could meet again.

“About freaking time!”

I hid my face in Joe’s shoulder as Caspar’s voice echoed in the hallway, and I could feel Joe’s body shaking with laughter.

“What are you going on about, Casp?” Joe asked, wrapping an arm around my waist and turning us both to face the South African.

“You two. It was supposed to happen ages ago. Why do you think I introduced you both?” Caspar asked before shaking his head and walking back into his apartment.

This time, I wasn’t the only one left speechless. Joe stood there beside me just as surprised.

teeny tattletail starters;

“ momma hates you. ”
“ give me a treat! ”
“ you’re in big trouble. ”
“ that’s me! ”
“ momma’s watching. ”
“ momma’s coming. ”
“ wake up, wake up, wake up! ”
“ more, more! ”
“ play time for me! game on. ”
“ oh no, oh no, oh no. ”
“ mommas looking out for you. ”
“ hint; don’t answer the phone. ”
“ me love you. ”
“ me tired. ”
“ then momma found the children; every last one. ”
“ show me mama! ”
“ where’s mama? ”
“ let’s play a game! ”
“ no peeking. ”
“ hide and seek! ”
“ you found me. ”

Anxiety & Mental Illness

There was a time in my life where I would wake up in the morning and experience any sort of dark feeling that you could imagine. I would look at myself in the mirror and find every single possible thing wrong with me. I was always so happy on the outside, but on the inside I struggled.
I’ve gone through some pretty crazy things in life, and I felt like I had an anchor weighing me down. But see, the problem with that, is that life is short. The more time you waste hating yourself, the less time you spend enjoying every moment you have on Earth.
Slowly, slowly, I changed. I started waking up in the morning, finding at least one thing I loved about me. And, every single day after that, I continued to do so until I was finally able to accept all my flaws, and still love myself in the process. I realized that happiness is a choice. Choose to wake up every day, proud of who you are, accepting and loving, instead of negative. Don’t allow yourself to drown in your surroundings. Be happy, be positive, and most importantly, love yourself. Whatever you go through in life, stay strong. I promise you, life is beautiful when you choose to believe it.

I have a few things to talk about as a former Hollywood Undead fan. I was BLIND to how disrespectful and problematic the songs and the member themselves are and now as I’m looking back on it, I’m glad I left. They have homophobic slurs on EVERY SINGLE ALBUM. Not just one album, all of them. Also one, but possibly more, of the members is an avid Trump supporter and that shows how anti-LGBT+ he really is, and as well he is against Black Lives Matter and that doesn’t roll in my book. Da Kurlzz is a toxic person and the band in general are problematic. this is the ONLY time I will post my own thing of hate into ANY fanbase because you guys really need to hear me out. I’m a gay and transgender boy and honestly, their songs make me cringe every time I hear that slur. please hear my plea, you can be fans of them all you want, you guys just need to hear this from the side of a former fan who has honestly left because of the problematic actions of the band.








This is a time when i’m gonna fight more. i will not take that ‘don’t be mean to the racists or else u will be as bad as them’ crap! N neither should u take it! This is how it starts. It starts from people not killing the weird looking cancerous racists all in the name of ‘peace’ n next thing u know they have invaded every part of our lives! 


Confession #1,971

Something that breaks my heart every time is when I see friends and family get really happy and excited about a holiday or activity, and then I have to be the one that tells them we can’t do it, or I can’t come, because I’m too ill. I hate always being the killjoy to exciting things. I wish I could join them and be happy with them, but instead, I have to look after my health and always be the one to decline things like that. It hurts even more when they do things without me, but that’s selfish.

I’ve heard there is a parallel universe
existing one inch above our heads.
Almost identical to our own but different choices
were made and a butterfly flapped its wings
a few less times. In that universe,
maybe we are still together.

I am looking for a portal to that dimension
and I don’t care if there’s no portal
back. In that dimension, you might hate me even more
than you already do. I’m willing to take that risk.
Maybe we will have never even met yet. I swear,
if that’s true, I will search every square inch of that plane
until I find you.

—  Excerpt from “Coffee“ by Roya Backlund

at times like this when hatred and bigotry win and it feels like the whole world has gone to shit, it’s so important to treat each other with so much more love and compassion than before. be as kind as humanly possible, treat every single person you meet with care and respect. if we can remain strong in the face of this shit storm, if we can keep our own small circles full of love, we can eventually beat these awful, hateful times. i’m not saying it’s easy, i’m so sorry this has happened, you have every right to be angry or fearful but we have to hold onto hope. look at the graphs of millennial voters, clinton would have won by a landslide, even brexit would have been firmly rejected, we have to believe that if we stay strong and united, we can change things. love will, eventually, always trump hate

“Alone Again” - Digital Oil Painting

I haven’t painted a straight screenshot in a while, but I had to do this one because I am just so blown away by David’s acting. This man in person is all joyous, frantic, kinetic energy, but look at him here. Look at his eyes. Defeated, resigned, hating himself and his situation. So still. He is a MASTERCLASS of acting. He deserves all the awards. This man IS the Doctor.

This is NOT a Photoshop filter, every stroke is painted by me.

His eyes would grow soft; that’s how I knew he was lying. His eyes only searched my face with such concern when his mouth searched her skin the night before. Our relationship was too much too fast and not enough love to last. Promises were never kept and wandering hands were inevitable. He used me in every way there is to use a person. He took and took until I no longer had, given nothing in return except the countless nights spent wondering where we went wrong. There was a time when he looked me in the eyes and felt more than just sorry. But that’s all it is, isn’t it? One person always ending up feeling just sorry. Sorry for this, sorry for that. But never really apologetic. Never really meaning it.
—  I asked her why she hated apologies

There are times when Jason really hates Leo.

Not ‘I hate your guts’ or 'if I see you at 3 we’re going to fight’ hate, but it’s more of a 'why do you invade my personal space and how do I get you to stop’ hate.

Well, he wouldn’t call it hate now that he looks back at it. It’s more of an annoyance at best and that’s pushing it. Sure, he understands that Leo has no idea about anything involving the word no, but he’s a good friend so he doesn’t say much.

It’s just that he should be used to this by now. He’s friends with Leo. Hell, he knows him better than anyone on the ship save Piper and maybe Hazel. He’s dealt with pranks, jokes, being set on fire, exploding machines, and even near death experiences because of him, but he knows that at the end of the day he’s not going to leave because it’s Leo damnit and he’s pretty damn likeable when he wants to be.

He’s not prepared for this. Or at least he should have seen this coming.

He can stand a lot of things, but he’s sure as hell not prepared to see his best friend (?) wearing his used Camp Jupiter jacket.

Okay, it’s not that bad. Or maybe it is. He just wasn’t expecting for him to like it that’s all. He’s found guys attractive before and Leo was certainly apart of that group even if he didn’t look at him as closely as before. Before this that is.

It just wouldn’t help if the jacket litterally covered him. He just looks oddly appealing with his hair a mess and the occasional oil stain on his face with his jacket overflowing on his body. Dear gods, it even hangs off of his hands and flops.

He grits his teeth and forces out a nod while Leo chatters at him at a hundred miles per hour with his over exaggerated hand movements while Jason is glad the dim lights of the kitchen cover his blush because dammit he’s weak right now and if Leo keeps doing flopping his hands he’s going to run.

Leo stops and blinks at him before pulling a face. A face Jason knows that is always followed by a smirk and then a somewhat offended pout.

“Are you even listening to me?” His eyes are narrowed, but his smirk is starting to show.

“Yeah. Right. Something about an engine not running?” he hopes for all that is worthy that that’s all he’s been talking about.

Leo snorts before shaking his head as if agreeing with him. “Huh, did you miss the part where I was explaining about how–”

Yes, he did. In fact he missed everything because Leo’s pulling that face again and dear gods does he know this isn’t going to end well.

Again. He hates Leo. Just maybe not as much as he loves him.