i had such a disappointment this week

Just Don’t!


Pairing: Stiles x Reader

Prompt: 21. Don’t try and blame me for what you did & 49. I waited and waited for you to realize that no-one is going to love you like me. Imagine my disappointment when you never did

Summary: You see Stiles and Lydia kiss

Every since you unintentionally admitted to having feelings for Stiles, you had rejected every call from him and shot down any attempts he made to visit.

Scott had been constantly telling you, for the last 2 weeks that this problem wasn’t going to get solved unless you talked it out with Stiles. You knew he was right, but the idea of even facing this right made you feel ill.

This morning, unlike the others, you finally decided to heed Scott’s words of wisdom. Taking your time getting ready, you rehearsed what to say to Stiles and the apology you were going to give to Lydia, even though apart of you didn’t feel like she deserved one. But Scott pleaded you make an amends, so that’s what you were going to set out to do today.

Scott had texted saying both of them were at the school library, it was opened on the weekends for any student that needed a quiet place to study. Heading there now, you mentally prepared for what was about to happen.

Walking through the school hallways, the sound of your boots clicking away echoed across the walls. Turning left, you halted when you recognized Stiles in the locker room. Stepping closer, you soon realized that he wasn’t alone. And once you got the full view, the one thing you didn’t mentally prepare for was occurring right before your eyes.

Stiles and Lydia, kissing.

Warm tears made their way to the surface, backing slowly away you bag got caught and you tripped over the bench, causing a noise. Stiles head snapped forward and his eyes grew wide when he saw you.

Regaining balance, you rushed down the hallway. Stiles called out your name and at this point you were ready to run. Somehow he caught up and rested his hands on your shoulders. Shoving them away, you couldn’t bear to look at him.

“Y/N wait!. I’m sorry-”.

Silencing him with your hand, you felt disgusted. “Don’t! Just don’t Stiles. Save your shitty apology, because I’m sorry isn’t going to fix this”.

“I was going to tell you, I didn’t want you to find out about me and Lydia like this”. He fumbled over a few words, but his voice remained steady.

Looking away, this was all too much.

“Yay for me, that at some point you stopped to consider my feelings. You know what Stiles, go screw yourself”.

Roughly pushing past him, he tried to grab your hand but instead got the bag’s strap causing it to fall from your shoulder. “I know you’re hurt, but you knew how long I’ve liked Lydia for. Maybe if you had told me of your crush sooner…”.

Scoffing, did he really just say that?

Jabbing him in the chest, you lowered your voice. Don’t try and blame me for what you did. Especially when you knew how it would affect me!”. Scrunching up your hair as you ran both your hands through, you were on the verge of losing it. “I waited and waited for you to realize that no-one is going to love you like me. Breaking eye contact from Stiles, a new set of tears were clouding your vision. "Imagine my disappointment when you never did”.

It hurt to be here, it hurt like hell to have Stiles standing opposite you. He went to say something, but decided against it. Which truth to told, was the best move he had made during this conversation.

Letting silence be the final words, you held onto your bag and walked out of the building.

You didn’t feel like going home, nor did you feel like being alone. There was one place your mind was screaming for you to go too, so that’s where you went.

Parking the car, you took your time walking up the pathway.

Ringing the doorbell, you saw the door swing open. Scott stood on the other side, his eyes already showing sympathy. 

“He kissed her, Scott”. Not longer being able to hold yourself up, Scott caught you before hitting the pavement. He lead you to the couch and stayed with you until the tears dried up and sleep took over.

I’ve been feeling kind of mild seasonal affective disorder feelings lately because at this point, it’s been cold since November (all of December, January, February, and March) and we especially have had barely any sunshine for the past two weeks. :/ It’s been cold and uncomfortably windy too over the past week :( I was really excited for today, because we were supposed to get some sunshine, and I REALLY, really wanted to go to the park with my mom and walk around. I haven’t been able to do that since October.

Anyway, I checked the weather forecast last night, and I saw that the “partly cloudy with some sunshine” had been downgraded to “cloudy, gray, and windy” and I legitimately felt depressed, because of how much I have been looking forward to a sunny park day all week. Idk, last night was just rough, between my dating disappointment and my growing weariness with the weather. I’m kinda burned out on this whole winter thing, since I’ve never lived somewhere with such long winters and little sunshine.

So my mom and I went shopping today, which never fails to make me feel better. I haven’t gone shopping for myself, to treat myself, since like October. I mentioned a while ago on here that I wanted to buy some fancy soaps, so we went to Burlington and HomeGoods and bought like six large bars of fancy made in Italy soap - gardenia, lemon, lavender, jasmine, white musk, etc. I also bought a box of honey lavender tea and some jasmine blossom scented fragrance sachets to put in with my sweaters in the closet.

So for $30 I treated myself and felt better… I think shopping, within reason (not too often and NOT expensive things), can be a great, simple way to give yourself a mood boost when you’re feeling down. The endorphin rush is real. The act of going out shopping is also a fun trip, a fun way to spend time, and a nice thing to do even when the weather outside is bad. 


Epic Party Rap Battle

At least I could say I tried : /

Based on @promiscuous-jalapeno Rap Battle HC

Please don’t mind the BG lyrics, I just threw some random rap lines I improvised lol. This comic should’ve been done by a better artist, but no one did…So… I tried… Hi… plz don’t be disappointed ; v ;

And Zen never realised his phone was upside down all along

EDIT :I wanted to post this comic for a WEEK now, but I don’t know why I can’t upload pics with my computer anymore ! It just never loads ?? And it still doesn’t work… So I used my phone Yea I became THIS desperate. If only it was quality content.. No it’s not… But it’s something… So I decided to add a little doodle : Mista Tru$t Fund Kid.



Sorry if I’m being a little inactive lately… I think I wasn’t ready to work at the pace I had set, so now I have to adjust things for next week and I fell a little behind. I’m not disappointed, these things happen and I know I will catch up soon 💪🏻

Meanwhile, the only pics I’ve taken are of the books I’m reading 📖

Regardless of what happens today and on Sunday - if we get the joy of johnlock or if we get the disappointment of the century - I wanna thank the tjlc community and all the sherlockians out there.

I had so much fun reading all the metas and figuring out all the clues in the show with you all. Past two weeks were incredible - so many amazing, talented people, jokes, memes, collective screaming, tears of joy and sadness. I had a blast. Now, that the finale is upon us - we will go through it together. 

Thank you, hang in there, we’re gonna be okay. 

Some clarifying and interesting new information about the school shooting in Grasse, France:

  • Killian Barbey is 16-years-old.
  • He’s openly admitted to perpetrating the shooting and investigators said they get the impression he’s disappointed he wasn’t able to fully execute his plans, similar to what he told the guard who confronted him during the attack: “I have not finished my mission. I have not done enough damage.”
  • Killian shared he had been planning the shooting for several weeks.
  • He stated he wanted to target between 8-14 classmates.
  • An unnamed 17-year-old accomplice has been arrested, and they have both been charged with attempted murder, though his role hasn’t been detailed. The accomplice’s twin brother was initially arrested too, but has since been released.
  • The 17-year-old’s parents had recently alerted the juvenile court about their son “for writing a letter to an American detained in Ohio for three murders in a high school.” It must be none other than TJ Lane!
A Reason for the Slow Pace?

First of all, this theory is not mine alone. @midnight-in-town had the initial idea and the following is based on a discussion I had with her last night. So a huge credit for this goes to her. :)

Many fans are quite disappointed and frustrated by the slow pace this arc has been going on for the last months. While the arc began with a mysterious cult, the disappearance of Lizzy and the findings of many corpses the focus has now been set almost completely on the performances of the S4 from Bravat’s sect and the F5 from Ciel’s competing music hall. This has been going on for a few chapters already which corresponds to quite a few weeks in the actual story while there’s seemingly not much else happening. BUT there might be a good reason for this which could be part of the actual plot. The progress of the arc is so unusually slow that it might even be deliberately and therefore may have a purpose other than fanservice.

Let’s first take a look at Bravat’s reactions in the latest chapter. While he’s confident at first and thinks that the F5 are amateurs and no competition against his S4…

…he’s completely surprised and even shocked by the actual performance and by the technology used (microphones, speakers, light sticks) during the show.

This surprise seems genuine, he didn’t expect this (even though he’s claiming to be a fortune teller). Bravat’s reaction here is very human. Also, he probably can’t be the one behind the advanced technology of the sect if he’s that surprised by Ciel’s technology. So it doesn’t seem like Bravat is a supernatural being or the one who’s pulling the strings at the Sphere Music Hall.

Another interesting reaction happened at the end of the chapter. While Bravat clearly showed his surprise and confusion about the F5′s performance before, he didn’t seem surprised at all when Ciel appeared. He even referred to him as the “Earl Phantomhive”.

I’m sure Bravat hasn’t forgotten about the boy who had Sirius’ blood and about the man he called a “collapsar”. Both are such a rare occasion that Bravat should remember them now that he sees Ciel and Sebastian. However, from his reaction towards seeing them now it seems like he already knew back then who the two of them were. This would also explain why he already seemed to recognize them the first time they came to the Sphere Music Hall and why he knew so much about them (the same probably happened with Lizzy, he already knew who she was, that’s how he could “tell her fortune” so accurately).

So someone must have told him about these people before he met them – someone who knows them. There have been many theories before that Undertaker could be the one pulling the strings here and by now I think this is very likely, so for the sake of this theory let’s assume that this is indeed the case here. Undertaker might use this cult to get blood which he might need for his ever ongoing experiments with his Bizarre Dolls.

Throughout the story Undertaker has been working on improving his Dolls. We don’t know yet what’s his goal in the end but it’s likely that he might wanna bring someone back from the dead (e.g. Claudia). But for this to work his Bizarre Dolls must be perfect, not some brainless zombies. Agares was already an improvement. However, this success rate was low. If Undertaker wants to bring back one person in particular he has to make sure that it works perfectly since he probably only has one attempt.

So maybe now he has found a way to not only alter the person’s Cinematic Record but also to use human blood for an improved version of his Bizarre Dolls. The four ‘Lords of the Stars’ could be prototypes of these improved Dolls. They are not yet perfect because they obviously still need a lot of blood which is why Undertaker might still be working on improving his experiments. Maybe the four Lords even show such a development already. The rooms of the Lords are quite different, so while Undertaker’s first experiment with the blood might have been a failure…

…and the second one might still have some ‘health problems’…

…the other two might already be greater successes:

But we saw that Lord Sirius still needs blood transfusions on a regular basis so while these new Dolls are already an improvement they are still not perfect. And here’s where the seemingly slow pace of this arc comes in. What Undertaker needs for his experiments is not only blood but also time! The cult around Bravat provides him with the blood but that’s probably not their only purpose. Its other important task could be to buy Undertaker time.

In the past, whenever Undertaker experimented with his Dolls Ciel appeared and interfered. First, on the Campania and then in Weston. So Undertaker probably expected him to interfere again and therefore might have thought of a way to distract Ciel from what the cult is actually doing. In the beginning of the arc the focus was more on the investigation of the cult so what did Undertaker do to hide his experiments? He let Bravat throw Sebastian out of the music hall to make an investigation more complicated and when Sebastian came back he used Lizzy to fight him, so he could hide the Lords meanwhile. Also, Lizzy’s presence changed Ciel’s focus from actually investigating the cult to getting Lizzy out of there (that’s probably why Sebastian didn’t investigate any further but brought Lizzy home instead).

And now a competition between Bravat’s S4 and Ciel’s F5 is arising. Since Lizzy has run off to the cult again Ciel has spent much time and effort in the creation of the F5, the organization of another music hall and a performance which rivals Bravat’s show. All this time he hasn’t set foot in the Sphere Music Hall again and hasn’t really investigated much. And while he thinks that he’s damaging the cult, he might actually play right into Undertaker’s hands because he now has all the time he needs for his experiments without Ciel interrupting him.

Ciel loves games and Undertaker knows that. He probably predicted that Ciel would take the bait and start a competition between the S4 and the F5. And while Ciel is occupied with that, he won’t disturb UT who can concentrate on perfecting his Dolls. Since Ciel is always very serious with his games and doesn’t want to lose he’s easily distracted.

Bravat probably is being used by Undertaker, as well. He might not even know about Undertaker’s plans since he seems to be quite into this competition, as well. But the more Bravat is into this competition between the S4 and the F5 the more Ciel will be, too. So this little ‘game’ between the two of them might be still getting more serious with each of them trying to surpass the other one. And while they’re doing this UT can calmly do his experiments and doesn’t have to worry about someone interfering.

Even if Ciel wins this competition he might realize that he actually fell into the trap that UT set for him and did exactly what he wanted him to do while giving UT the time he needed to make his perfect Bizarre Dolls.

So in conclusion, there’s a possibility that the reason why so many chapters and so much time of Ciel’s ‘investigation’ is focused on the arising competition between the two music halls is actually part of the plot. Undertaker could be using the cult and their performance to lure Ciel into a competition which distracts him from the actual investigation. And that gives UT the time he needs for his experiments to create perfect Bizarre Dolls. So far, this plan seems to be working. When the arc started it was August (that’s when Greenhill approached Edward) and now we’re already in November. And Ciel used most of the time to create a competing music hall and start a competition with Bravat. So even if it’s not Undertaker, whoever is doing these experiments with the blood transfusion had already much time to do their thing without much interruption because Ciel is focusing on different matters. And while Ciel thinks he’s winning, he might actually be playing right into the hands of the cult’s mastermind. 

Stevie [Part 2/4]

Prompt : Based on @shittyaus : where a superhero has to deal with a supervillain who thinks they’re their best friend

Pairing : Steve Rogers x OC

Genre : Good ol’ crack and fluff  |   Warning : none

Author’s Note : Thank you for your lovely feedback! Here’s part two! I hope you guys enjoyed it! as always, i’m looking forward to your thoughts! <3

Read Part 1 Here


Steve didn’t get to go to the dog beach with [Y/N] and Eggtart that week (he had to keep the name. The damn dog no longer respond to anything other than that stupid name). It was relieving and oddly disappointing at the same time. Bucky Barnes caught her trying to steal money from the bank, again, squealing in glee when she asked to see ‘Stevie’. He let her go soon after that, with a promise of a sleepover with the rest of the avengers if she could stop causing havoc for a week, an offer which she accepted in a millisecond. Steve almost smacked his friend’s head with his shield when Bucky gave his number to [Y/N].

“BYE, STEVIE!” She excitedly waved as she jogged away from them, laughing sheepishly when her swirl of magic accidentally set fire on a bush near her. “I HOPE THAT DOESN’T COUNT AS HAVOC.”

“She’s so cute.” Bucky commented as he walked back into the quinjet, smirking at red-faced Steve.

“She’s not.” Steve grumbled.

“It’s so cute how you try to negate everything we said about her.” Natasha pat his cheek as she walked past him.

* * *

He didn’t see her again until a week later. They were planning to have a movie night and Steve was looking forward to getting a decent sleep without any interruption. He was busy trying to juggle the beers and Natasha’s bag of snacks when he heard Bucky’s voice.

“Do you have company?” Bucky looked at him and frowned. Bucky turned his attention back at the pair of boots neatly placed on the step. Steve stretched his neck to get a better look and let out loud sigh.

“Jesus Christ.”

Sensing no real threat, Bucky felt himself relax and he raised his eyebrows in amusement before making his way to the living room with the pizza boxes in his hand. He quickly paused in his track the moment his eyes caught what might be the reason of Steve’s resigned sigh.


“Don’t.” Steve glared at Bucky who kept pointing his finger at the dog bed in the living room.

“I brought some snacks for–” Natasha burst into Steve’s apartment and came to a halt when she noticed the awkward silence in the room. Her eyes slowly landed on the woman sleeping on the dog bed, curled next to Steve’s dog.  “I suppose we should leave you two be?” she whispered.

That cannot be comfortable, he thought as he watched her sleeping figure.

“Wait here.” Steve sighed, rubbing his face with his hand while he took off his jacket and draped it over the nearest couch. “And don’t you dare say anything.” He added with a glare. He ignored his friends’ stares and made his way to his bedroom to retrieve a spare blanket before walking over to where [Y/N] and his dog were sleeping. She was curled on the dog bed, trying her best to fit in the huge dog bed while his dog lay on top of her, sleeping like the dead. He pressed his lips into a thin line when he heard Bucky’s dramatic gasp behind him as he draped the blanket over her body.

“How romantic.” Bucky quietly mumbled. Steve fought the urge to roll his eyes as he grabbed her denim jacket and her bright red scarf she had thrown on the floor, neatly placing them on the coffee table in front of the couch.

“I feel like we should take her back to jail.” Natasha mused and made herself comfortable on the couch. She took all the pillows and piled them together before leaning back on the couch.

“Naah.” Bucky waved her off and gulped down his beer. “She’s harmless.”

“She almost burned down a building last month.” Sam, who joined them a few minutes later, quipped.

“The CEO is an asshole.” [Y/N] sleepily mumbled. “He liked to hit his dog.”

Steve froze for a moment, watching her open her eyes and yawn. “Did you kill him?” He heard Natasha asked.

She looked at them with an offended expression. “Who do you think I am? Of course I did. He hit dogs!”

“You need to stop killing people, [Y/N].” Steve sighed. He could feel his age catching up to him. She sat on the carpeted floor and wrapped herself with the blanket he gave her earlier.

“But I don’t like him.” She whined.

Steve massaged his temples and plopped down on the single couch across Bucky and Natasha. “You don’t kill people you don’t like.” He mumbled and let out another sigh.

“What else are you going to do to them?” She asked and took out her phone from her pocket, shoving the screen at Steve’s face. “I got his dog now. Look at that little guy. I named it Poop. It kinda looks like poop, doesn’t it?”


“It does, Steve.” Bucky nodded in agreement as he took her phone from her.

* * *

“STEVIE! COME SEE MY DOG!” [Y/N]’s loud voice caused him to flinch. He looked up from his book to see her running with a fat wrinkly dog in her arms. What the fuck is that thing? His eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

“What is it, [Y/N]?” He asked.

She skidded to a halt in front of him, almost falling down if it weren’t for him catching her arms to steady her. She beamed and put the dog on his lap before taking a seat next to him. “Say hi to Poop.” He was about to pet the dog when he noticed her expression.

“What are you trying to distract me from?” He narrowed his eyes at her.

“NOTHING!” She quickly said, followed by a loud explosion from around the block. She gave him a little smile and grabbed his hand, forcing him to pet the dog’s head. “Just pet her. It’ll calm you down.”

“Please kill me now.” He groaned, throwing his head back in resignation.

“Just pet her!”

“[Y/N]! COME HERE, YOU LITTLE SHIT.” Steve quickly looked up to find Tony flying towards them in his suit.

“Oh shit.” She cursed, raising her hands and threw all chairs and tables on her sight at Tony. “Gotta go. See you later, Stevie!” She picked up the dog and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before she ran away.

“Holy shit.”

“Shut up, Stark.” Steve glared at him with cheeks as red as the dress she was wearing.


Keep reading

I’m back in my Holy!

I was not locked for many weeks, and was quite disappointed that I’ve never managed to stay locked for more than a few hours.

Today I contacted @morningcamille. I’m following his page for a long time, and I’m very impressed, and even a bit jealous about how he feels with his body. Free to show it, in real life as to the whole internet, and free to set himself chastity goals and share it with us.

We talked together and he proposed me to help me keep my balls full. We had a phone call, and he gave me some tips. He told me that I should start to lock myself for 7 days at the beginning.

I’m now under his coaching, and I’ll try to keep myself locked until next Monday, the 27th of March 2017, 9pm.

I know that this first « long » lock will be hard for me, so if you can encourage me, it would be a pleasure to have your support! :-)

A perfect day for coffee.

Pairing : Sam x Plussize!reader
Word count : 585
Author : Mel
A/N : Not my best, I wrote it while feeling shitty about myself. I still feel pretty shitty.

Part 2 of the ‘Who Are You’ Series

Your excitement over Sam wanting to have coffee with you slowly turned to disappointment as the days dragged on without seeing him. Once two weeks had passed, you figured he wasn’t really that interested. You tried to not let it get to you, but it did. You felt like you weren’t good enough as you were. You started feeling like you needed to be thinner, hotter. You started wearing baggier clothes when you went out to exercise. Like today, you were wearing yoga pants, and a hoodie that was two sizes too big.

You were lost in thought as you walked along the path you normally ran, and barely registered someone coming up behind you. “Hey!!” You turned just as a hand came to rest on your shoulder. “Hey. I’ve been calling out to you.” He smiled.


Keep reading

Okay but what I understood from the past few days was that he was making a video that was kinda a big deal and important, but he stopped (I think he said he wasn’t sure he was ready or something?) and also that he’d had one hell of a week and this video was basically to distract from that… so please, I understand the disappointment people are facing, but let’s be fair to him and appreciate the video he did put up. I thought it was a fairly good video, it made me snort out loud (which I usually don’t because I’m in the same room as my mom and she’s asleep) and my poor son deserves sunshine and positively

Also props to him for actually going with the wholesome self care and hydration theme, we can makes jokes about it but it helped me take better care of myself (since I’m a piece of shit who never has the energy for self care), so thanks to him for that.


From an early age, Andrew has learned that nothing good ever came from emotions. Caring for someone was exhausting when in a few months’ time, maybe even a few weeks, he would be off to the next foster home. So Andrew stopped. He stopped caring for people who would only disappoint him. He stopped caring for himself when it was easier to forget the pain that way. He stopped caring for life itself when it proved that it was not going to get better. It was what made Andrew not only a good goalie, but a great one. He cut nanoseconds off his reaction time by skipping the shock and excitement when a ball is lobbed his way.

But then Neil Josten came along and Andrew was drawn to him like fly to a honey trap. His scattered thoughts jumped around but kept on landing on Neil Josten, dangerous. Neil Josten, the boy who didn’t add up. Neil Josten, where it didn’t matter if he swung or not, as long as he was close, as long as he was protected from the nightmares chasing him. That was enough.

Then Neil went to the nest. To protect him. ‘If it means losing you, then no.’ Those words reverberated through his head on an endless loop. Andrew did not have friends. Not like that. Not someone who would willingly go through hell, no matter how pointless, just for him. The signals weren’t so clear anymore. When Neil asked that one question, Andrew decided he would finally spell it out loud and clear. ‘That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t blow you.’ And it finally got across to Neil.

Andrew watched as Neil recalculated the world like he was prone to do. He checked the exits out of habit and then he locked eyes with him and Andrew saw something that made his heart beat a little faster, his hands become a little sweaty, his face twitch minutely in a semblance of a real smile.

And then it was gone. Because hope wasn’t something he believed in. Hope was a construct of fools and of people who disliked words for their sound and connotation and not for their life experiences.

When Neil was standing in front of him asking what he was afraid of ‘heights’ came out, but another fear was there bubbling up from the depths. A fear that had blue eyes, auburn hair, and a reckless personality.

And when Neil was on the roof and Andrew leaned in and Neil wasn’t moving and their lips touched and Neil still was not moving to stop him, his heart felt like exploding. But like a tire with slow leak, it deflated and he pushed Neil away.

But Neil kept on coming back and back and back. Until he was gone. And Andrew realized that he was a fool. He made a mistake. He let someone in. He knew better. After Aaron. After Cass. After he was seven and please no longer meant being polite. His emotions were out of hand. He didn’t realize the control he had learned over the course of his life was gone, slipping away slowly until it hit the ground and shattered into a million pieces.

AO3: inhale


I promised myself I wouldn’t go to Red Robin this week. I’m so, so close to onederland and I want to get there so bad! But, shit happens. I went to happy hour last night with my friend and we split nachos and drank a glass of wine. Ok, I had two glasses of wine. Then when I got home, I was still hungry, so I whipped up a box of Annie’s mac and cheese for me and my boo. Not my finest day. I went to bed feeling bloated, a little gross, and slightly disappointed in myself. Before I fell asleep, I was looking through some old photos and found this one (left). My jaw dropped.

Damn y'all! Look how far I’ve come!

The photo on the left was taken on my 23rd birthday, May 2015. The right is today. I love these side-by-side because they remind me that bad days are just a drop in the bucket compared to my journey overall. I have come SO FAR, not only with the numbers on the scale but with my relationship to food and exercise and my confidence in myself and my body. Feels so good 💪🏻

So even though today I’m having a bad hair day, even though my skin is breaking out like crazy, even though I had a cheat day yesterday, I feel super motivated to power through! And so good about myself and my progress!

Today my coworker asked if I was “still trying to lose weight” because I look “so skinny” - of course I said yes. I don’t talk about my weight loss at work that much because 1- everyone does and it’s kind of annoying, and 2- this has always been a hard thing for me to deal with. So when someone notices and says something, I know I really must be working hard.

I’m on track with my points today, got a free salad for lunch 🙌🏻, and am mentally prepared to have my ass handed to me at the gym tonight. Dinner is zoodles and ground turkey. I’ve got breakfast and lunch prepped for the last two days of this week. Nothing can stop me, y'all!

Hope everyone is having a good hump day and a positive week. Remember: the scale is only a small fraction of your journey. There are so many things to celebrate along the way. 🤗

anonymous asked:

Matsuri's death has been Tatara 2.0. It's as if Ishida is really good at setting up plot points but terrible at seeing them through to a satisfying conclusion. Everyone's exciting about the Amon Kaneki reunion but they're 100% going to be disappointed. All the reunions have been crazy rushed. Touka just punched him in the face and Tsukiyama said it was water under the bridge and the fall out of the Tsukiyama arc has never been mentioned again. Also remember Eto? My saltiness goes up each week!

I would be lying if I said Matsuri was one of my favorite characters. He wasn’t. He is certainly not of the same caliber as Tatara and Houji for me, but I remembered how they were handled when I read this chapter.

tbh I had so many high hopes for Matsuri and I actually thought (even though I suspected weeks ago that Furuta set a trap for him to off him) that he would show some character development in the coming chapters.

It is annoying me because it was done with no purpose whatsoever. If anything, he was better off killed on the ship during the Rushima arc, along with Yoshitoki. His survival served no purpose whatsoever, I repeat, whatsoever.

I always wondered what happened on the ship that day, and was waiting for someone to recall the events in future chapters. It always annoyed me (and confused me) why Marude chose to spare Matsuri’s life, and only kill Yoshitoki. I assumed something happened that forced Marude to flee the ship, even though he intended to kill Matsuri too. That is what I assumed, and waited for Matsuri to give some insight into that. 
Marude knows that if Yoshitoki is dead, Matsuri would succeed him, and he was canonically shown to disagree with that. There is no reason why he would want to spare his life.

What was the purpose of Matsuri surviving that incident then? I always thought there was one. Sadly, it looks like I was wrong.

I don’t see a point in revealing that:

  1. Matsuri was gay (or may have never been comfortable with his own gender or orientation). 
  2. He held feelings for Urie
  3. He actually loved his father, Yoshitoki. 
  4. He suffered after his father’s death to the point of becoming an incompetent human being (ghoul). 
  5. Him showing a regeneration ability upon being cut with a katana, in the head, without displaying a kagune, and putting up a better fight. 
  6. Him showing compassion and likeness to Furuta when he realized his voice is similar to that of his dad.
  7. Him showing interest in Nico.

I don’t see a point for all of these revelations if he was going to be killed off-screen, without him having the time to reflect upon his life (through flashbacks), to tell us why he doesn’t have a kagune, what happened on the ship, what happened in Germany, why he holds such feelings/desires…. or any sort of explanation whatsoever.

Once again, there has been unnecessary build up for character potential, yet said character was killed off without us having any answers, or means to find these answers through other characters. 

I just… don’t understand why, and I am confused as hell as why this pattern is being repeated. 

I don’t mind negative character development, but this was not that at all. I am pissed off that Matsuri was reduced to being comic relief and a weirdo and is literally an icon for mockery. He at least deserved few panels to reveal why he was that way, why he acts this way. Sorry to bring this up again as a comparison, but Torso has had the negative character development and a whole chapter to show why he is THAT fucked up. I don’t get why he was graced with that, but other characters are being denied the bare minimum (few panels).

I am not going to comment on the other things you brought up, because those said characters are still alive, and perhaps these things will be addressed in the future (though I certainly no longer hold any hopes).