i freaking love this quote like so much

*In the Missions Room*

Kakashi: How many?

Iruka: Kakashi!

Kakashi: How many dicks have you sucked?

Iruka: Let it go!

Kakashi: How many?

Iruka: All right! Shut up a second and I’ll tell you! Jesus! I didn’t freak out like this when you told me how many girls you fucked!

Kakashi: This is different! This is important! How many?…Well?

Iruka: Um… something like 36.

Kakashi: WHAT? SOMETHING LIKE 36!?

Iruka: Lower your voice.

Kakashi: Wait, what is that anyway, “something like 36?” Does that include me?

Iruka: Um… 37.

Kakashi: I’M 37!?

Iruka: I’m going to class.

Kakashi: Oh, my God. [Ninja walks up to missions desk] 37! My boyfriend sucked 37 dicks!

Ninja: In a row?

Hired by BigHit: Bittersweet- Part 8 [END]

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader

Genre: Fluff, Angst

Summary: You’ve always had respect for Min Yoongi’s musical talent. As one of BigHit’s new producers, you now get to experience both the bitter and sweet sides of him.

Parts: 1 // 2 // 3 // 4 // 5 // 6 // 7 // 8 [END] // Epilogue (fake text)

Hired by BigHit Series: Taehyung // Hoseok // Yoongi // Seokjin // Namjoon // Jungkook // Jimin


Keep reading

What's Good Miley?

Oh man, someone reminded me of some bullshit I had repressed because I was too busy being pissed about the healthcare law.

These stories about Mikey Cyrus going clean and sober; I’m going to leave the commentary about the racial aspects of it to other people whose lane it actually is. But, OMG, the way the coverage has treated her and her “recovery” and the way she talks about it makes me want to punch everyone.

A (incomplete probably) list of my issue:

(1) They’re talking about her stopping smoking weed as though she was shooting up heroin literally on the Judge’s Chair on The Voice. Like, obviously I don’t know the full extent of her drinking problem or how much weed she was smoking, but she was clearly incredibly high functioning. Can we not talk about this like Lindsay Lohan or Lamar Odom sobering up and going clean (two names I have picked randomly out of my memories of “celebrities who have had dramatic issues with drugs, alcohol, and mental health in recent years”)?

(2) Despite the fact that the news stories are covering it as though she was snorting coke off Blake Sheldon’s ass on national television, the way Miley talks about it seems so freaking dismissive of the experiences of people actually struggling with addiction. Her quotes were like “it’s been so fucking easy actually; I love feeling clear headed for the first time in forever” and “I just feel so much more in touch with myself spiritually,” and so on and so forth. Like, I’m absolutely fine with her saying “hey so I decided to stop smoking weed because it wasn’t making me feel good anymore” but don’t try to get attention both on the one hand for going clean and sober but then on the other hand talk about it like it is this cake-walk that is just so easy for you because you’re in such a better place now (does the better place involve a Hemsworth dick? Because, let’s be honest, the better place involves a Hemsworth dick.)

(3) When she gave the big interview that came out about this, she told them she had been clean and sober for THREE fucking WEEKS. Again, bully for you, but it all just feels so performative. Frankly, just as her trip to the high-side also always felt pretty performative, this recapturing of her sweet and innocent (and white, LBR) feels incredibly performative too.

(4) The three weeks thing also bugs me because it goes against all common sense for good public relations strategy if you are *actually* an addict in recovery. Generally, celebrities in recovery are more like pregnant women, you wait as long as possible to make any announcements about it (if you make any at all) because the risk of relapse is real and once TMZ gets wind that a celebrity is an addict or in recovery, their goal in life will be catching you when you relapse. Because they are assholes. Paparazzi will not only stalk the shit out of you and harass you, they may very well try to stress you enough or trick you into relapse so they can get the “money” shot. And the public will eat it up.

Honestly, the whole thing feels like she gave an interview and got the cover of a magazine (one I’ve never heard of, but still) and got breathless articles on Buzzfeed and shit like that for announcing that she gave up caffeine for Lent or something.

All of this should be read with the understanding that I absolutely acknowledge that alcoholism is a serious disease and that, while I think “addiction” to pot is less of a thing, I absolutely think there are people who abuse it. I don’t know if Miley is one of those people, but every one of my bullshit detectors is going off with this. Because I just cannot imagine a publicist recommending to someone with a serious addiction problem that they handle it this way. And nothing in Miley’s career suggests that she would just go off and do this on her own; her career has always been well managed and strategic (even when it seemed a bit more like “strategery” rather than actual strategy, like when she humped a creepy, older, married man on national television.)

Anyway, so there’s a slim chance that this is just Miley being Miley but I find it much more likely that she has decided she wants to shed the weird mixture of flower-power wild-child white girl who thinks she’s down with black people because she twerked once and is doing so by performing the “I’m going clean and sober” act so people will be just.so.relieved that little sweet Miley has been saved from the big bad world and now they can listen to her cover of Jolene without having to feel like they are associating themselves with “those sorts of behaviors.”

And I don’t quite know where my strong feelings on this come from, but as a chronic pain patient who is constantly treated like an addict because of the medication I need and a human being worried about the opioid crisis, this kind of blasé and almost condescending approach to “recovery” kind of offends me. … Or apparently really offends me, considering how long this post has gotten.


just some cute au things about the girls

  • inej works at the coffee shop
  • nina works at sephora or something
  • they meet up to have lunch at the food court during their breaks and talk like they haven’t seen each other in years, although they do this everyday
  • nina especially just talks, talks, talks because she misses inej whenever she’s not near and she feels like so much happens since the last time they saw each other
    • not much does but shh
  • they don’t go to the same colleges so this keeps the material alive. nina goes to some cosmetology school or something idk bear with me
    • they gossip so hard. not in a mean way, they don’t make fun of people, they just animatedly discuss them behind their backs…
  • i mean inej hears everything she’s not exactly meant to because no one can hear her coming when she’s walking passed the stock room at work or down hallways at school and such
  • “i’m pretty sure erin and x broke up again” inej announces when nina is mid sentence about the reality show she watched last night
  • she gasps, “no!”
  • (they don’t even know who this x person is)
  • inej works with a girl named erin and she argues on the phone to someone between breaks, screaming out we’re done! every couple weeks but she never says a name so it drives inej and nina crazy
  • “but x was doing such a better job this time around. i mean, like, it’s been three whole weeks. i’m sensing a bit of development.”
  • “what if we’ve gotten it all wrong? what if they aren’t the problem, what if it’s just erin”
  • “plot twist”
  • “and yesterday julian totally got busted. apparently his mom thought he was living on campus all of this time, when really he has an apartment with his boyfriends”
  • nina chokes, “plural?”
  • “yup.”
  • “damn, get it, julian.”
  • and i feel like when they hang out with each other after work, nina brings inej makeup she probably wasn’t allowed to take out of the store
  • “this one is called black like my soul.” nina giggles, tossing the eye shadow at inej as soon as she stepped foot into nina’s apartment
  • “is this for me or kaz?“ 
  • “kaz in eye shadow. ha! that’s something i want to see”
  • inej laughs and shakes a bag at nina, “i came with gifts, too”
  • inej always brings nina little cakes from the coffeshop she works at. nina considers kissing her for it
  • they both relax on nina’s couch, one on either end, facing each other, legs tangled up. nina keeps dropping crumbs everywhere, but she doesn’t care
  • nina and matthias totally have a dog, conveniently named wolf, and he circles at the foot of the sofa hoping for cake, too
  • “sorry, wolf, pretty sure nina’s cleavage is catching it all”
  • nina likes to do inej’s hair and makeup because inej doesn’t particularly care about either of those things and nina could use some practice
  • but inej draws the line at colorful shades of lipstick
  • “dude, vibrant purple, are you kidding me? that’s not coming anywhere near my face”
  • “inej, don’t be difficult! you have such great lips and you’re wasting them on nude colors”
  • “i don’t even think that color would go with my skin tone”
  • “trust me, everything goes with your skin tone”
  • “nina…no.”
  • “nina…yes.” nina pouts until she can convince inej 
    • and damn nina for being right. inej looks in the mirror and realizes the color does look good on her
  • they take so many selfies. i feel like nina would be a selfie queen
  • and inej likes to take candid pictures of nina because she’s still beautiful even when she’s not prepared. inej posts these on instagram with deep captions and poems
  • they both love this. inej’s followers love this. everyone loves this.
  • one time they were making cakes together and had a flour fight
  • inej got so many shots of nina laughing, red dress covered in flour. even flour on her eyelashes. these photos went up with quotes reminding people to enjoy the little things and how important friendship was
  • nina calls her the night the photos went up. she’s in tears, “they’re just so freaking cute. i don’t know how you do it. i wish i could see me like you see me. i feel like the world is so much more meaningful in your eyes.” she sobs
  • then nina hiccups and inej catches on. she doesn’t know how she didn’t hear the thudding bass in the background before
  • then matthias’ voice fills the phone, “why are you in the bathroom? are you crying?”
  • nina slurs “i’m talking to my secret lover! go away, you - you…”
    • apparently she can’t think of an insult. she gives up and says to inej, “where was i? oh yeah, i love you. you’re the best. you know, if i could give you a strip of the moon, i would.”
  • matthias clears his throat, but then he realizes, “it’s inej, isn’t it?”
  • of course it is, matthias
  • inej just laughs. “hey, i love you, too, okay? have fun at the party. and drink lots of water!”
  • nina mumbles something inej can’t understand. inej makes her put matthias on the phone and reminds him to remind nina to drink water

bonus

  • somehow inej convinces kaz to wear the eyeshadow
  • he agrees only if she makes it go around his whole eye so he looks scary. i’m talking up to his eyebrows and then underneath his lower lashline. he thinks he’s channeling demon looks
  • he doesn’t look scary at all
  • but inej takes photos and sends them to nina who replies with the skull emoji because she has officially died of laughter
    • nina will never let kaz live this down

this is so lowkey gay and completely self indulgent. and it’s probably a mess but i wanted to post it. how did i even format this?? anyway, it was in my drafts. i wrote it at 4am lmao

Okay so...

hypable.com just posted an article containing quotes from Season 2 Episode 11 of Shadowhunters

GUYS

THERE’S A “Love you too”

!!!!!!!

And being the Malec trash I am, my brain immediately went to our favorite shadowhunter and warlock

DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH IM FREAKING OUT RN?!?!? BC HOW WILL IT BE SAID? WHO SAID IT? HOW WILL THE OTHER REACT? WILL THEY SMILE LIKE IT’S THE FIRST TIME THEY HEAR IT?? OR WILL IT BE CASUAL AS IF THEY’VE BEEN SAYING IT TO EACH OTHER FOR A LONG TIME?!??

I NEED ANSWERS

—————————————-

Nevertheless if I’m wrong, please don’t hold it against me. Anyone could’ve said it but since my head is basically just MalecMalecMalecMalecMalec, i thought of this first and made myself cry T-T Correct me if I’m wrong though (If it’s only episode 11 or the whole 2b???)

If you’re looking for the article, I found it through ShumDario News on twitter (They’re amazing!! I love them!!!) Notification squad bc :)))))

6

Then while we’re being cannon fodder for snobs like you. Judging people like me from your ivory towers with no thought about why we do what we do. We ain’t got much choice, you get me? And if we’d be born with the same silver spoon up our arses, we’d do just as well as you. If not better.

8

They yell at me to be dignified. But what are the dignified people like? The people who are held up as examples of me? They are snobs. Frightful snobs. I’m a curiosity in Hollywood. I’m a big freak, because I’m myself!

jaebyeomm  asked:

So you may have been asked this before but I just found your account (I'm in love💖🌸) but how tall are you and how did you lose weight(and how much do you weigh if you dont mind me asking)? You look fantastic and seem tall like me so I started freaking because there aren't many girls my height haha

Thank you bb! I’m 5'6", I look tall because I always wear massive shoes. My weight loss was just natural for me when I started to eat healthier 💖

He tells me it will be okay when I’m freaking out.
He watches teen mom with me all day and doesn’t complain.
He holds me when the sadness overwhelms me.
“It will be okay baby.” he says when I’m worrying crazily.
He knows what I’m thinking when I don’t say a word.
I’ve never had anyone be able to read me like he does.
Or understand and calm me like him.
And those moments warm my heart so much.
I feel in my heart,
that this kind of bond and understanding doesn’t come around very often.
—  Chapters from my life
World’s Most Famous Couple Combo: “So You ARE Dating Your Costar.”+ “Rumors, rumors, and LOOK! More Rumors.”

“Angry? I’m not angry, babygirl. I’m furious.”

At what?!? What in God’s name could you possibly be angry about?”

Justin and I have been going on this stupid argument for eight days, ever since I began working with my dreamy costar, Peyton Rancic. Justin’s convinced I’ve gone mad and fallen for Peyton, but such a thing isn’t possibly when the sexiest man alive is your boyfriend of over two years.

“You expect me to drop this? Y/N look at this! You are dating your costar! I’m your boyfriend!” He shouted as he flaunted a magazine in my face.

I grabbed Justin’s hand, holding the magazine and dragged him to the couch. 

“Watch this, ready?” I opened the magazine.

“Taylor Swift dumps Calvin Harris for a guy twice her age. Rumor.”  I explained.

I flipped four more pages.

“Miley Cyrus eats worms on a new diet. Gross rumor.”

I flipped to the cover page and shoved it towards Justin’s face.

“Y/N Y/L/N leaves boyfriend Justin Bieber for Peyton Rancic. Rumor, and you know it!” I dropped the magazine on his lap.

“Y/N…he’s all over you all the time.”

“Justin! This freaking magazine says I’ve gone rogue and that Peyton and I are moving to Wyoming to start a family of nine! It takes a brain smaller than yours to believe some shit like that!”

Justin sighed.

“…Have you gone rogue?” He joked, smirking.

I rolled my eyes and hit him on the arm.

“I’m sorry. Y/N you’re the most beautiful girl in the world and I’m possessive over you. I’ll believe anything involving somebody taking you away from me.”

“Justin, that’s not possible. I love you so much it’s crazy. I think about you like…99% of my life.” I quoted from Never Say Never, causing Justin to giggle.

“I think about you 103% of my life. I can’t imagine living without you.”

“I know I can’t live without you.” I agreed.

“Then there’s only one thing we have to do.” Justin piped up.

“Go rogue?”

“No,” He laughed.



Marry me.”

Reasons why you listening to Welcome to Night Vale is a good idea

The fandom. Holy smokes the fandom. The art they put out is so imaginative and amazing that I could cry.

The story. Believe it or not but night vale has a ridiculously continuous plot. Some thing that happened in episode 37 was just revealed in Episode 70. And it’s been talked about in between those episodes too.

The characters. Not only are the main characters amazing and adorable but the other characters are crazy too. Hiram McDaniels the literal five headed dragon. Old women Josie and her friends that are DEFINITELY NOT ANGELS named Erica. Intern Dana! Tamika Flynn the teenage government fighter! The faceless old women who secretly lives in your home! John peters, yknow, the farmer? The Apache tracker! Kevin who is basically Cecil’s terrifying double! Khoshekh the floating cat in the men’s bathroom! Also there isn’t a shortage in representation in the characters.

It’s hilarious. Like seriously. I think I’ve cried laughing before. I wish I could expand on this but if I did I would be writing a twelve page paper made up entirely out of quotes.

It’s simultaneously horrifying and not at the same time. I get scared easily, but I’ve never been afraid of night vale. So it’s never kept me up at night, but it can still be creepy, yknow? As you listen to it, you worry for the characters, but your fear never travels into your own world.

Carlos and Cecil’s relationship. I hate romance. I hate it. I love their romance. It’s Netflix. It’s cute dates. It’s fluff. It’s awkward. It’s adorable. And it gets shaken up quite a bit throughout the podcast. It’s really a wonderful thing. Even before they get together it’s adorable because Cecil is so freaking in love with him. Also even if that’s too much for you you usually only hear about Carlos through the occasional phone call or through word of mouth via Cecil.

Typical night vale weirdness. Soon you too will be able to understand why sometimes you see quotes like “ALL HAIL THE GLOW CLOUD” And “do not approach the dog park”! (Tbh for the longest time I thought that the glow cloud was a home stuck thing.)

Cecil’s fashion choices. Just…. Figure this one out when you listen to it. (“I wore my best tunic and furry pants!”)

Emotions. Yeah, I may have cried while listening to this. I have definitely scared my family when I screamed in shock. I also laugh a lot while listening to this.

Because it will make me very happy? Please? I am so alone.

(I could literally talk about this all day so I’m cutting myself off here.)

2

naley appreciation week: day 2 - favorite quote(s)

Nathan: Haley, you got a tattoo for God’s sake. It just freaks me out a little bit, because obviously this whole thing with us means a lot to you. I just don’t want to do anything to pressure you or drive you away. Even though sometimes I can’t help it. Just like I can’t help that I fell in love with you. Cause I did. I love you, Haley. And it scares me a little bit, but there it is.

Haley: Wow. There it is. I love you, too.

anonymous asked:

Yes!! Talk about Jensen and Danneel too!! They are so adorable together.

heck yes they are!!

where do we start? i think danneel’s insta profile pic! look at jensen’s face as he’s looking at her jfc you can practically see the heart eyes tbh and that dopey grin *sigh*

or what about this?

and then the specific danneel quote going with the specific picture and the way jensen’s looking at her in this post i mean honestly

but okay then there’s these two pictures and like???? hellllllo?????

there’s a smile on jensen’s lips but you can also see it in his eyes. there’s literally all love right there

the way they look at eACH OTHER???? they’re ridiculously in love and i just?? it’s so beautiful i wanna cry

and dANCING AT THEIR WEDDING?? JENSEN’S FACE?????

that freaking smile…. *^*

and idk this gif is so cute??

i just love their marriage so much and i will fight to protect it thanks because you can’t look at these two and tell me that they’re not in love with each other for fuck’s sake

What is perfect anyways?
I hear people talk about what they want
In a significant other
Random little attributes and whatnot
Some will talk about how they found
Someone that’s just what they were looking for
But
Until I met you
I didn’t really know what I wanted
You’re tall
You’re scrawny
You’re awkward
You’re such a nerd
You’re so freaking weird sometimes
Babbling random facts
Or slipping into another language on accident
But I love it all
I’ve never known what perfect is
But I think I may have found it
—  you’re perfect to me

anonymous asked:

Hey (: more nice thoughts (& questions)! What are your favorite book scenes/quotes between or about Geralt x Yen? Everything is so beautifully described when they're together, especially when they're intimate. It's impossible not to get pulled into and feel a glimmer of their relationship and the strength of their bond.

I totally agree. The intimate scenes are like next level, powerful, tasteful and very meaningful. But as much as I love that aspect, I freaking love all the little things and all the humor within the relationship.

For example in The Last Wish I literally had to put the book down and laugh at the part after Geralt and Yen had just fought the Djinn and each other and the town was basically rubble and everyone thought the two of them were dead or had killed each other. We get this gem of dialogue where Dandelion was all; “Yennefer’s alive! I heard her moan. There, she moaned again!” “Uhuh” confirmed Errdil. “I heard it too. She moaned. She must really be suffering!” “Chireadan, where are you going? Careful!” The elf backed away from the shattered window through which he had carefully peeped. “Let’s get out of here,” he said quietly. “Let’s not disturb them.” From the passage before that, we know she’s having sex with Geralt.

Also, in Sword of Destiny I love the way Sapkowski writes Geralt in this scene where they are both going through their usual rituals before going to bed. It feels so private but so authentic. After completion of another contract and a fight with another beast, Yennefer examines a naked Geralt as he has just finished bathing. Everything seems to be in order,” she said. “Lie down before the elixirs knock you off your feet. Those mixtures are devilishly dangerous. They’ll destroy you in the end.” “I have to take them before a fight.” Yennefer did not answer.  She sat down at the looking glass once more and slowly combed her black, curly, shimmering locks. She always combed her hair before going to bed. Geralt found it peculiar, but he adored watching her do it. He suspected Yennefer was aware of it. He suddenly felt very cold, and the elixirs indeed jolted him. He cursed and fell heavily on the bed without taking his eyes off Yennefer.” A common theme throughout the novels regarding their relationship. This unspoken sense of understanding. These little things. 

To add to that, in Time of Contempt, after they make love, (for the third time in a row?) Geralt, in his thoughts, imagines things that he knows Yennefer finds beautiful because he knows that her telepathic abilities are heightened in such moments. He does this for her. For her pleasure and happiness. That’s some serious love and devotion if you ask me. But back again to that good ole humor. In that same scene which I quoted in the above paragraph from Sword of Destiny, there is this annoying bard singing outside their bedroom window two stories or so below and Yen without even uttering a single complaint about the bard just levitates this giant blob of Geralt’s bathtub water out the window and drops it straight on him, drenching the guy. He hurls curses up at them and they simply laugh. It’s that banter that makes them so appealing and that thankfully came through in the game.

I mean there is just too much to chose from! Those examples above are only from the first two books which are just a compilation of short stories before the actual main plot kicks off!  I could write a study on all of their moments and how beautiful of a relationship Sapkowski crafted. Goodness there is so much. The novels are a literal goldmine of Yen and Geralt fluff. If anyone that reads this ask/fan-rant and wants to add a favorite quote or scene in the replies, please do! I would love to hear it.

anonymous asked:

What is Dick's relationship with Kyle Rayner like?

Dick barely has a relationship with Kyle. Kyle dated Donna, so I’m sure they know each other from there, but otherwise they don’t have much of a rapport. Despite that, from the time they did meet, they got along pretty well.

(JLA Vol 1 #73)

“I’d hug you, but honestly, I’m too freaked out to move right now…”

Why does Dick want to hug Kyle? Because Bruce and the other Leaguers are alive, yaaaaay.

I like that the phrase is a line from Dick’s favorite song.

(New Teen Titans Vol 1 #16)

(Nightwing Vol 2 #150)

I think Dick and Kyle have pretty similar temperaments and could easily get along, though I don’t know much about Kyle to really get into this.

Playlist (2)

Here another playlist of song I like and listen everyday :)

Halsey - Is There Somewhere // Haunting 
Melanie Martinez - Dollhouse
G-Eazy - Tumblr Girls // Complete // Calm Down
Justin Bieber - Love Yourself // Mark My Words
The Neighbourhood - Cry Baby // Single
Lana Del Rey - The Blackest Day // Freak // Never Let Me Go 
Panic! At The Disco - Hallelujah
Hoodie Allen - No Interruption
Alessia Cara - Here // I’m Yours
DJ Snake - Middle
blink-182 - I Miss You
Jack U - Mind (feat. Kai)

There’s so much more but the playlist will be too long haha. Tell me your favorite song and I will listen it !

10

As long as I feel solid about my creative choices, people can have whatever image or perception of me that they’d like. You can’t think that someone’s impression of you is wrong—it’s their impression—and, therefore, you really can’t worry about it. So many people have developed their impressions based on fucking bullshit, and you’ll never do anything true to yourself, you’ll never make the art you want to make, if you’re concerned about that.