i freakin hate it

Some more Twin Things™ in honour of our favourite genetic identicals

-being pissed when people don’t make an effort to tell you apart
when the new freshman backliner is stuck cleaning the court after practise: hey Andrew, can you pass me the bucket of balls?
Aaron: it’s Aaron
Freshman: same difference
Aaron: *maintains eye contact while reaching out with his foot, knocking over the bucket so that balls scatter across the court* 

-being annoyed when people can’t tell them apart (”we’re not the same fucking person”) but also weirdly annoyed if they can (”you guys don’t actually look that alike!” “yeah cool what makes you think that your opinion is relevant???”) 

-hoarding extras so that your twin can have a share of the good stuff
Andrew: *takes the last two beers from the fridge, ignoring Kevin’s protests*
Kevin: why are you taking both, you know that’s my favourite brand-
Aaron: *comes out of bathroom*
Andrew: “hey, catch loser” *throws beer at Aaron*
Aaron: *swears and fumbles catch*

-’So who is the evil twin?’ questions.
Allison: *laughs*

-Matt and Nicky are watching Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows when the scene where Fred dies comes on. Aaron steals the remote and changes the channel bc honestly fuck that shit

-holding grudges for each other, even when the other twin has forgotten about it
“Andrew why do you keep targeting that dealer.” “He tripped you with his stick.” “No he di- Andrew that happened last year

-using each other as a comparison for all their weird health problems.
“urg, i feel sick.” “yeah that happens whenever I drink milk.”
“that sign over there is blurry right?” “…uh no?” “What? no, everything in the distance is out of focus.” “No it isn’t?!” “Fuck.”
(Nicky: oh my god you’ve been driving us around for three years)

-both twins secretly wanting to dress up as the twins from the Shining for Halloween

-using ‘We’ a lot
Andrew eats tuna, proceeds to break out in hives. “Dumbass, we’re allergic to tuna.” “oh we are, are we? since fucking when?”

-even when they don’t have any evidence for it
“nah we hate maths.” “actually calculus is alright.” “…who even ARE you”

-being more insulted when their twin is insulted than when they are
Aaron’s classmate in med school: your twin is, like, a pro footballer or something right?
Aaron: sure
Classmate: haha guess you got all the brains between you, huh?
Aaron: *not sure why he’s so offended, but offended all the same*

-speaking of med classes, Aaron definitely gets that little jolt of excitement whenever a lecturer mentions twins or twin studies. quietly like ‘hey, that’s me, i have one of those’ it’s a thing

-definitely have dealt with creepy dudes at Eden’s Twilight who just have to mention the Twin Thing. Andrew punched one in the kidneys. Aaron thinks he should’ve used a knife.

-the Five Second Fight phenomenon 
Aaron: *says something rude or aggressive at practise*
Andrew: *says something cruel*
silence. they stare at each other for a few seconds. Andrew slowly reaches out and flicks Aaron on the forehead. Aaron rolls his eyes and gives Andrew his Gatorade. It’s red flavour. Andrew’s favourite. They are both appeased. Everyone else is too scared to comment.

-they don’t have twin ~ESP~ or anything, because it mostly comes from years of over-exposure. they’re still working on that classic Twin Bond. 
*both of them studying at 2am”
Aaron: i freakin’ hate anatomy, why do i need to know that the hyoid bone provides attachment for the larynx-
Andrew: that bone is often fractured in victims of strangulation
Aaron: what
Andrew: in dead bodies. if the hyoid bone is fractured, often they’ve been strangled. Neil told me.
Aaron: 
Aaron: …neat
(shhh they’re bonding)

-anyway TWINSIES 

Okay but

CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW THIS OBNOXIOUS GUY JUST INTERRUPTED LICHT???

AND GOES ON AND SPARKLE LIKE THIS???

Mikuni : Ah, Abel! Forgive this sinful me! My very existence is too perfect for this world! With just one look can fascinate everyone. I have a handsome face, a good lineage, and I’m smart too!

Tsuyuki : Your personality is bad, though.

AAAAAHHHH I JUST LOVE THESE TWO SO MUCH XD Thanks again to @canthydefromthelicht for sending me the link! x3

“The Hunt” Casifer x Reader

Words: 2,065

Casifer (Lucifer) x Reader

Request: Can I request a reader x casifer one shot where he and the Winchesters get injured on a hunt (the reader stayed behind to do research). And when they come back the reader helps patch them up but casifer gets very jealous that she is helping/touching/paying attention to the Winchesters?

Warnings: Language, mentions of violence, wounds from getting hurt, talk of sex, jealous lucifer, implied smut

Originally posted by cassammydean


“Please tell me you’ve found something useful.” Dean mumbles over the phone, sounding slightly drunk. You can hear people in the background talking loudly, indicating that they may be at a bar.

“I’m not finding anything in the books. I don’t know. You need to give me more time.” You groan, flipping to the next page of the lore books.

Sam, Dean, and Lucifer (who was currently preoccupying Castiel’s body) were out on a hunt. Lucifer demanded to be taken along, since he was a “viable member of the group.” They got to the place where the killings have been happening yesterday, and you know that Lucifer is driving them crazy. Dean has barely any patience when it comes to that man, and it’s leading to both him and Sam rushing you to figure out what it is that they’re hunting. They’ve only been gone one day and Dean is already overly annoyed with Lucifer.

“Just please hurry, alright? I can’t- I swear to god, I don’t even care that you’re occupying Castiel’s body right now, you need to fucking stop or I will stab you.” Dean hisses at Lucifer, making you giggle slightly. “Y/N, figure it out, or I’m making him stay with you while we do this hunt.”

“He’s not that bad. You need to be nice- he’s helping us with Amara, after all.” You roll your eyes even though you know he can’t see it. “But, yes, I will pick up the pace. I’ll call you once I figure it out.”

Keep reading

Jealousy

L x reader

aaaaand I am going to regret this tomorrow morning so I’m hiding it away in my queue… I mean, it’s not like the Death Note fandom is all still that much alive…? Ugh, I wrote this like two freakin months ago and each time I go back I hate it a bit more. So let’s get certain things out of the way: first of thanks to my real life friend whom beta-read it for me and thanks to @12infamous, whom I forced to read it for me. I didn’t have anyone whose first language is English to read it for me so… Second, as usual, Y/N is for your name BUT F/N is for FAKE NAME, since the reader is someone on the taks force and all; and it’s also supposed to be about a week or two after Misa’s and Light’s “Date” in episode 18. So yeah… If any of you like it please just tell me?

Enjoy!


Sitting on the couch, quietly sipping her coffee, Y/N was at loss. On her left was sitting the only other woman living in the building, while facing her was her boyfriend, handcuffed to their #1 suspect for the current case. To begin with, Y/N was far from a fan of the idea of sitting there for at least an hour, doing nothing but staring at the two young men in front of her, with her most serious look, simply to make sure they wouldn’t start fighting once again. Of course, Misa wasn’t at all happy with this fact either, as Light clearly wished his forced date to be over with. Actually, the more time passed, the more it became clear to Y/N that L was probably the only one who enjoyed himself to some extent. And of course he did, since someone (who knows who it was, the slices were simply sitting on the table when they came in) brought cake for everyone.

“And why did she had to come?” complained the blond on her left, giving an annoyed look to Y/N, “As if having you with us wasn’t enough…”

“I’ve got to say I’m in total agreement with you Misa,” sighed Y/N, turning to her, “but someone’s got to be here to stop these idiots from fighting…”

The first one simply sighed, reaching for her coffee.

“It’s not as if it was my choice to be handcuffed either…” added Light, leaning against the back of the couch as he crossed his legs.

Silence arose in the room, only interrupted by the quiet noises of someone sipping their coffee and the light sound of a fork hitting the plate as L ate his cake at an almost alarming pace.

“F/N… Where do you come from?” asked Misa, turning to her.

Shooting a quick look to the man facing her, as if to ask whether or not she should tell this kind of information to one of the suspects, the young woman sighed.

“I was born and raised in England,” she carefully said.

“Did you left anyone back there?” questioned once again the younger woman, tilting her head to the side.

“Yes.”

“Then why did you came to Japan for the investigation?” This time it was Light’s turn to ask, intrigued as to why someone who clearly hadn’t be called on the case by anyone, came anyway.

“Well…” started Y/N, turning to him “Mostly to annoy my boyfriend…” she smiled lightly. “He would have rather seen me staying home.”

“F/N! You’ve got a boyfriend?!” exclaimed Misa, surprised by the fact.

Of course. None of them knew because “safety”. Telling their prime suspects of her boyfriend was already a mistake in itself: the first thing Y/N and L had agreed when she came was “no mentions of your relationship with anyone, no mentions of our friends back in England, your family, and even less our own relation.” The young man had been clear, especially on that last fact. That and “Don’t ever give your real name to anyone.”

And that was her first slip off. Knowing the young idol, Y/N was sure to be showered with questions on her partner.

“Yes,” she turned to the blond, “Why, do I look like the forever-single type?” she laughed.

“No! That’s not what I meant!” defended Misa, shaking her head.

“I’ve got to admit I’m surprised he let you go on such a dangerous investigation…” added Light, “We’re talking of a man who only needs a name and a face to kill, after all…”

Y/N smiled to herself. “I didn’t really give him the choice either.”

“How is he? What’s his job? How did you met? I want to know everything!”

And here were Misa’s questions…

Hidden being her cup as she drank some of her coffee, Y/N took advantage of the short instant where her expression wasn’t visible and made eye contact with the detective facing her.

“Well…” she started, her own eyes still locked into L’s grey ones, “We met at Uni,” she broke the eye contact to turn to Misa. “He was always a bit odd and as curious as I am, I just went and… befriended him, I guess,” she shrugged, “I took time but in the end he opened up to me and we started dating after a few months.”

“This is so sweet!” exclaimed the actress, clasping her hands together. “Does he know you’re the only woman in the group?”

“Of course, he does! I couldn’t possibly keep this from him…” answered Y/N.

“And do you think he might be jealous?”

“Jealous?” she laughed, “I don’t know, but maybe he should…” she took a sip, “I mean… Matsuda for one…” she looked at L, who seemed more and more absorbed by his dessert, “He’s far from the idiot he might look like and he’s not someone I’d complain about the look either.” She placed her cup back on the table, “If he were to come up to me and ask me out…”

The sudden screeching noise of a fork scratching a plate cut her mid-sentence, surprising everyone in the room, as the dark-haired detective picked his slice of cake with said fork, a bit too abruptly.

Well, if she wanted to make him jealous, Y/N could now rest assure of the fact her boyfriend indeed now was.

Glancing at the clock, she sighed.

“It’s already been an hour…” she shook her head, “I don’t want to break it to you guys, but we’ve got to go back to work.”

“I guess so…” said Light, raising from their couch and stretching. “It was nice spending some time with you Misa.”

“Can’t you stay a bit more? You never have time for me.” complained Light’s “girlfriend” “I miss you…”

“It’s not as if you too never see each other.” Mumbled L, standing up, his empty plate now on the table. “Besides, we already have another “date” scheduled by the end of this week.”

“It’s not as if we really let them have some alone time either, Ryuzaki,” pointed out his girlfriend, now at the door. “Next time you should maybe take off your handcuffs for once and watch over with cameras. At least it’ll give them an impression of intimacy,’ she suggested. “Anyway, later, Misa.”

With that, she opened the door and left.

“See you next week,” said Light, as L started dragging him out of the room, mumbling to himself.

——————————~☆☆☆~——————————–

Back into the surveillance room, Y/N was already at her computer, going through some old record tapes. On the opposite side of the room, working on his computer, Matsuda kept glancing at her, then back at his screen, then at her, then back at his screen, and so on, a small smile on his lips. Beside him, Light’s father was reading some old reports on their case, hoping to find new evidences leading to Kira.

As soon as the two young men entered the room, everyone stopped what they were doing and turned to them, waiting for orders. Still dragging his suspect, L directly went to the sole woman in the room, lightly tapping her shoulder.

“Yes?” she asked, turning to him.

Leaning in, L pressed his lips against hers, as she almost instinctively placed a hand on his chin, ardently kissing him back.

Everyone stared at them, in complete and utter shock, as Light just didn’t knew where to place himself, kept close to the couple by his handcuffs.

Too bad for the whole “keeping-their-relationship-secret-to-everyone” thing now, since L was almost pinning Y/N against her desk, kissing her with all the passion and desire he had kept locked tightly in himself for all these months, tired of this mascarade, tired of pretending to only be acquaintance with her.

Raising his right hand to play with her hair, his movement was stopped mid-way by the handcuff, the light clicking of the chain bringing the couple back to reality, as their eyes snapped opened.

They slowly pulled away, releasing the other one from their embrace, already missing the contact of the other one’s skin against theirs.

Turning to Matsuda, L send him a clear message through his otherwise rather emotionless eyes, Y/N was his, and no one else’s.

And without any words, the dark haired detective went to his own seat, dragging Light along, as Y/N turned back to her screen, carrying her work, quickly imitated by everyone else, as they were still trying to figure out what exactly had happened.

COME ON GUYS!!! REALLY??? (spoilers)

So im starting to notice something is going on with this fandom. And honestly i have this GINORMOUS urge to slap each and every one of the fans!!!!


Where should i start?? OH i KNOW! How about ppl not appreciating what cheritz gave us: a V route. Ive seen sooooo many ppl complain and whine that they wanted a saeran route instead of a v route. Like can you not!?!? Cheritz worked so hard and even delayed the date of the route, scared that we would be dissapointed, just so we can have the luxury of enjoying it. (Heck i think theyre still working on it since the after ending isnt out yet) Remember when ppl kept complaining to cheritz that they wanted a V route?? Yeah me neither!!!! What will cheritz think of us when they see this pattern of asking and getting but never appreciating???


Another thing is that in Vs route ppl are dying over saeran/ray. They act as if its sooo hard to avoid rays temptation. Like am i the only one who wasnt comfortable being with ray or whenever he called to say something “romantic”. And v is left to the side by the fandom. THIS IS V ROUTE PPL NOT SAERAN/RAY ROUTE!!! It saddens me to see that after months of begging and urging cheritz to be able to romance v we finally get the chance, but what happens? Apparently this ISNT what they asked for!!!! Its like a 9 y/o who wanted an iphone 8 but instead got the iphone7 xl and starts whining and crying!!! Tumblr is flooded with NOTHING BUT ray content. I hardly see any content about v even though its HIS FREAKIN ROUTE!!!!


Also i ABSOLUTELY LOATHE the fans that are hating on v still!!!! Calling him stupid and a coward. I remember even seeing someone comment on how they were dissapointed in v for not being able to get us out of mint eye and running away without us. Like… It was dozens against one… And doesnt even know how to fight!!!! Can u blame him??? Also if he was a coward he would have easily let seven take care of everything. But he didnt… In FACT V even came back to get us again remember??? He risked he life TWICE!!!!


I get this feeling that fans are also frustrated with v because he doesnt admit his love for us until like the very end. While ray showers us with “love from the beginning”. And seeing that fans love attention i can see why. But the thing is its not real love. As someone else put it, its obsession. Obsession and fear of being alone. His intention was to use you from the start. It doesnt matter if he gained feelings for you or not, or the fact that you went there on your own account (the players may know otherwise about starnger danger, but unfortunately the mc isnt so smart but she is innocent), you were gonna be forced to join a cult. You were gonna be forced, even if you were hesitant, to drink the drug. And even though ray is hesitant to hurt you and others as as well, it doesnt excuse the things hes done so far.


Yes, its sad that we cant save ray or give him the happiness he should be able to have. But lets remember that not everyone can be happy in one persons route. Unfortunately, someone has to suffer till the end. But saeran already gets to have his happiness in sevens route and honestly thats enough for me. But this is Vs route and its his turn to be happy. And im so thankful to cheritz for giving us this chance to make him happy.


Honestly, i may sound a bit mean but, ill be glad if cheritz NEVER makes a saeran route. After all this time we whined and complained for a v route??? After all this time they took to make it as enjoyable as possible, even fearing the delay that took place??? And ESPECIALLY AFTER SEEING THAT FANS KEEP WHINING ABOUT WANTING A SAERAN ROUTE AFTER BEGGING FOR A V ROUTE????!!!!?! At this point cheritz has the right to ignore these unappreciative fans. They dont deserve to be insulted like this. And we dont deserve cheritz’s precious time and money. Yet there they are doing everything they can to satisfy our wants. I feel bad because i know there are saeran fans who wanted to save saeran because they want to help him live a better life but were also willing to enjoy the v route without complaint. And need i tell you that im really only calling out the fans who arent appreciating the V route, insulting V as a character, who has suffered so much just to keep his loved ones safe, but advocating saerans unhealthy obsession with the mc, and those who call out and insult cheritz for not giving them what they wanted.


Im sure cheritz is done with all ur guys shiz. I for one am. Also let me let you in on one thing. Be greatful, western audiences, because from what ive seen cheritz pays more attention to us then they do korean audiences (theyve seen the “does jumin han is gay” meme, theyve made jaehee have feelings for the mc even tho in korea gay couples are still kind of taboo and above all the V ROUTE ITSELF, just to name a few). I made this a pretty long rant. But i just had to get my thoughts and feelings out there. I hope im not the only one who thinks about this.

What really pisses me off is that although Haggar was controlling Narti, technically, if they had removed Kova it would have fixed every problem. Sure, Narti wouldn’t be able to see, but it would be better than being dead. 

IT WAS FREAKIN KOVA NOT NARTI THAT WAS GIVING THE INFO BACK TO HAGGAR. KOVA WAS THE EYES. Narti was innocent and if Lotor had stopped and thought about what he was doing, he wouldn’t have made such a big mistake.

blackcur-rants  asked:

So in honour of the new Justice League trailer, can I ask you what you feel are the top ten worst things about the DCEU movies so far?

*grins evilly, cracks knuckles*

Let’s get this one out of the way:

10. This fucking shot right here

“Pretentious” does not even begin to cover it. And that expression! I don’t have much nice to say about Henry Cavill in these movies, but I do enjoy his utter inability to hide his embarrassment at what he’s participating in at this moment. 

9. The Why Did You Even Bother Club: Lois Lane, the Daily Planet, Rick Flag & June Moon, the media, the military, Congress…

Remember how The Avengers had this idea of Agent Coulson as the in-universe fanboy who understood the team better than anybody, and how the best part of Age of Ultron was the trip to Hawkeye’s farm? So why do the “human” elements of the DCEU feel so forced and stale?

8. Someone needs to go to jail for these action scenes

I thank the gods that I (unlike many of my friends) walked into Man of Steel sober, because Snyder’s destruction porn in that movie is a truly bad trip. Everything you need to know about the dude is in this juxtaposition: when he’s showing a building breaking apart, he wants you to see details, dammit, this is his canvas. When he has to cut to, y’know, humans, they’re dully shot and horribly lit, and his impatient desire to get to the next orgasmic splash-panel-shot is palpable. Elsewhere, the Doomsday sequence in BvS not only extends the plot far beyond its logical climax (the dictionary definition of overkill), it’s an unbelievably dull and drab nesting doll of mushroom clouds, pure headache-inducing sound and fury signifying nothing, my least favorite superhero throwdown on screen…until the Enchantress fight in Suicide Squad, which had me in tears in the theater, I was laughing so hard.

7. Pa Kent wants you and your children dead, you hear me? DEAD!

This may be the single worst aspect of Man of Steel specifically. I hate it on every level. I hate that Pa Kent spouts this BS, I hate that we’re supposed to take it seriously, I hate how it bogs down the post-Krypton story with no real weight or payoff (since we already know that Adult Clark is saving people by the time we get his Dad’s speech about not doing so), I hate that entire unbelievably dumb tornado scene, and I hate how freakin’ casual Snyder and Goyer are about death throughout this SUPERMAN STORY. Supes kills Zod, screams that scream…and then he’s downing satellites with a smirk, and biking through an apparently just-fine Metropolis, and hahaha look, glasses! Tone? Stakes? What are those? What was the point to him killing Zod other than Snyder getting that fetishistic close-up of the scream? Man of Steel was always going to be a bad movie, but this is where it became a Bad movie.

6. THIS IS KATANA

SHE’S GOT MY BACK

5. Batman v Superman is I Took Half a Philosophy Course, The Movie

Every single second of this insufferable thing is screaming at you to take it seriously. Every. Single. One. And it’s earned maybe 2% of the time, usually when it directly swipes a line from a comic. There’s nothing else to most of these scenes—just This Is Dramatic, with no attention put into the “this” from the basic “we need to care about these people” angle that Marvel generally has a lock on. The ambition falls flat. In particular, the worldbuilding sequences in BvS (the Injustice future, the Flash visitation, the videos of future JL members) constitute some of the clumsiest and most misguided scenes ever in a comic book movie, because they thoroughly ratfuck the tone, pacing, and focus in the most masturbatory manner imaginable outside of literal porn. (Has there ever been a less appropriate use of Exciting Pump-You-Up music than when Wonder Woman is…sitting at her laptop…watching QuickTime videos?) 

4. Scene to scene, line to line, end to end, every storytelling decision in Suicide Squad is wrong

I don’t demand a movie make perfect logical sense for me to like it, and nitpicking about plot holes often aggravates me, because there are many more important things to making and watching movies. What I demand is that you not assemble your movie like a dozen different food-poisoning-induced fever dreams all happening simultaneously. When you have to literally actually reshow parts of your “villain launches their evil plan” sequence (kind of an important part of a comic book movie!) because it was so confusing and poorly communicated the first time through, you’ve lost any semblance of structural coherence. This isn’t clever nonlinear storytelling. This is an abysmal, abyssal editing fail. Honestly, given the garbage fire behind the scenes, Suicide Squad barely counts as a finished movie.

Final three slots reserved for the fatal performances. You know the ones.

3. How did you let Jared Leto keep doing this after day one

How did you not brain him with a shovel or something

2. Why, though

Why would you do this to us

And of course, at #1…

1. This ostensibly sentient block of granite you insist on calling Clark Kent

Ok, that’s not entirely fair. He’s poorly cast, written, and directed. The DCEU is fundamentally broken because its central character does not work. He’s got two modes–deadly boring and straight-up deadly–and neither is compelling. I’m far from the first to say it: this is a Superman for people who never liked Superman.

anonymous asked:

Scrappy Doo can't die though, because he's a freakin' GOD. I hate it too, but it's just something that we'll have to live with for eternity....

Not a god per say, but a demonic being teetering on the edge of true immortality. He can die, but only by my hands. He can be severely injured by others, but death can only reach him if I deliver it.