i forgot i had this thing

there had been a fight once.  just one.  but levi thought of it so often it might as well have happened a hundred different times, a hundred days in a row.  

things had been going too well.
and levi just
felt an itch up his spine, a sore one that made him feel all off-balance and nasty.
he picked a fight over a pair of socks.

you never fucking pick up, he snapped. the balled up socks bounced off of erwin’s chest and erwin’s calm, ah sorry levi i forgot, made him feel small.

you dont take anything seriously, he said.
i do, erwin said. just different things. people are different, levi. he bent and picked up the socks, put them in the hamper and levi felt all at once a hundred memories of just how seriously erwin made love to him.  it made his insides feel too big for his skin.

i cant do this anymore, levi said.

okay, erwin said, and let him go. the look on his face haunted levi, broken and fond, like he loved levi for leaving.

levi’s apartment was very large now. maybe it had gotten bigger while he’d gotten used to erwin’s. waste of money, he told erwin while he scrubbed down the bathroom. erwin didn’t answer because erwin wasn’t there.

levi saw him again, months later, at a bar. his five o'clock shadow had grown into something more wild and his eyes weren’t the same shade of blue.

im sorry, levi said in the dark of erwin’s bedroom. erwins lips were all salty wet when levi kissed him and he laid with his head on levi’s chest for a long time like a sad old family dog. levi saw one like that once. it’d gotten lost, he thought.

you’re gonna give me beard burn, levi said.
erwin lifted his shaggy head to move, but levi pressed him back down and cradled his jaw.  didn’t say i didn’t like it.

then he said, can i stay this time?

i never wanted you to go, erwin said.

juiceboxjedd replied to your post “What, in your humble opinion, is the ugliest pokemon other than…”

Why doesn’t anyone ever think Hariyama is ugly? That thing is an abomination.

I CAN’T BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT HARIYAMA. Its anatomy confused me for a very long time. My young brain just couldn’t comprehend what was going on. Makuhita was so cute. It had a good theme going on. Why does Hariyama only have eyes and human ears and a weird hairstyle on its head. Why. What happened to its mouth. How does it eat? Why.

Just got back from therapy. It was an honest and difficult session (and cut short bc she forgot her office key and had to go home) but it was a good session.

Now I’m getting things ready for school:
- making list of textbooks
- emailing professors that I’m missing the first week of classes
- filling out forms for financial aid
- going through my schedule

Robert is supposed to come over today so I’m excited.

Have to do a 2 miler at some point for Day 2

Also…last day with long hair!!!


Things I did today as a shitty horse owner™:

▪ Had zero motivation to keep practicing the bow so I let him get away with only half the behavior.

▪Reinforced my horse for biting things.

▪ Got stung by a bee because I was letting my horse drink from an ‘unsafe’ fountain, then felt incredibly bad about the poor bee.

▪ Gave him a pear and two sugar cubes.

▪ Finally dewormed him after putting it off for 15 days.

▪ Forgot calling the vet so he can get his teeth done AGAIN.

anonymous asked:

i just remembered a really gay moment™ i had last year! my crush forgot her calculator at home and she had a maths test later that day so she gENTly touched my shoulder to get my attention and then asked me if she could use my calculator. all of my friends immediatly reminded me that we'd probably write a suprise test later where i'd need my calculator. i was too gay to say no to my crush so i didnt have a calculator for my test ¯\_(ツ)_/ ¯


the things we do for cute girls :’) 

Happy Birthday to my favorite green genius!! 💚

Voltron actor AU where everything’s the same but Voltron is a live-action TV show and the paladins are actors:

  • Their names are the same in real life. They go by different names in the show. 
  • Keith and Lance still have a “rivalry.” Red and Blue didn’t originally have it, but when the cast first met and the directors saw how Keith and Lance interacted, they wanted to write it in. 
  • Shiro’s arm is still a prosthetic, although the scar is fake.
    • sometimes the makeup crew forgets the scar. literally no one notices until it’s the end of filming
    • “Shiro…” “Huh?” “…they forgot the sca–” “are yOU FUC–”
  •  Shiro, Keith, Lance, Hunk, and Allura all do their own stunts. 
    • Pidge is only 17 and their mom won’t sign the waiver for them to do their own stunts. 
  • No one really knows how their little production company was able to afford hiring Allura, who’s a big time actress and super talented.
    • they eventually find out that she’s a giant mecha/space nerd and came to /them/ asking for a role and willing to do it for free
  • No one really knows if Coran has a script or if he was told to just say whatever
  • Lance calls Keith “Red” so often that Keith thinks Lance has forgotten his name
    • he hasn’t.
  • The paladins, Allura, Coran, and basically all the actors boycott after season 2, demanding retribution for the way they wrote Hunk and Lance’s characters. 
  • Hunk has an engineering degree in real life.  
  • Matt isn’t Pidge’s real life brother, but when they first meet it goes something like: “baby sister!” “big brother!” and they end up inseparable.
    • Pidge’s mother is known for calling Pidge at work just to talk to her son, Matt 
  • Hunk and Shay’s on-screen chemistry was actually a real thing. Shay was cast at the same time that she was working in the costume/design department, so they’d known each other since the show started. 
    • they’re dating now
  • Every time Lance’s character hits on Allura’s on-screen Lance spends five minutes defending Blue’s character after filming 
    • “he just craves attention, okay? he just wants love!! he’s smart and beautiful and wants to belonG”
    • despite this, Lance is basically his character minus that shoddy writing in season 2
  • Keith and Lance have their own shipping fanbase. It starts out with just their characters, but then Some Mysterious Person starts taking candids between sets and posting them online and klance is born
    • it’s Pidge. Pidge runs five fan accounts. 
    • the pictures are super incriminating, but no one shows them to Lance or Keith
    • there’s a betting pool on when they’ll get together
  • Keith gets super into his roles and ends up genuinely upset after filming the scenes where the princess reacts badly to Red being part Galra. 
    • Allura gives him a 15 minute hug after
  • Bonding Moment Discourse is actually a thing. There was a prop malfunction on set while they were filming and the directors told them to stay put, so Lance ended up being Cradled for a solid half hour.
    • later, they find out that they could’ve moved and just chilled for that time, instead of actually holding each other.
    • “I get it Keith, I get it. You just wanted to hold me. Who doesn’t amiright??”   
Busybody stay-at-home mom neighbor harasses me until my restraining order kicks her out of her house.

I lived across the street from a very bored stay-at-home mom whose excess idle time turned her into an insufferable busybody.

Her husband backed out of the driveway and slammed into my roommate’s car parked on the curb. He apologized, gave us his insurance info, and took care of it. He was never a problem, because he accepted responsibility for what he did.

His wife, however, demanded that we never ever park any cars at the curb again, because “we can’t get out of our driveway otherwise”. The street was very wide - she was just completely unable to accept that the accident was her husband’s fault, and figured we were somehow responsible for it, ergo we were responsible for preventing it in the future.

We told her that we would avoid parking there whenever possible, but that we still had the legal right to park on the street, and that if necessary we would still do so, and that it was her and her husband’s responsibility to avoid hitting other people’s legally parked cars when backing out of the driveway. She wasn’t happy with that answer, but just told us we better stay out of her family’s way, and stormed off.

One day, she came storming over, banging on the front door, cussing us out. We got her on our security camera saying “If you don’t move that f*cking car in the next 10 minutes, I am going to f*cking total it with my truck. It’ll be your fault, and you’ll have to pay for the damage to my f*cking vehicle”. To this, I simply responded: “I don’t know whose car that is, but I didn’t park it there. I have you on camera, so if you do anything to that car, I’ll have to call the police and hand over this tape”. She then threatened to sue me for invasion of privacy for recording her, and still insisted that we move the car, even though it wasn’t our property. We just ignored her, and she did not do anything to the car - we did keep the recording though.

A few weeks later, I had a friend visit from out of town. He parked his car on the curb, and then started unloading some stuff from his trunk. She came storming out, screaming and cussing at him “I have told you repeatedly never park your f*cking car on this curb. If you don’t move it, I am going to f*cking total it, and you can f*cking pay for a new goddamn car, as well as the damage you do to mine!” He tried to calm her down, and asked if there was somewhere else he could park, and she replied “You can park it in Hell, because that’s where you’ll be after I f*cking kill you!”.

Unfortunately for her, he had his dashcam running the whole time, and it captured everything. He called the police, and she was arrested for threatening to commit vandalism and for threatening violence.

A few days later, she left a long-winded hate-letter in our mailbox. It was written as if it were an open letter from the entire neighborhood, and it basically said that “nobody knows who you are”, and “Everyone wishes you would move away”, and “Nobody wants you living in our neighborhood”.

Thing is, she forgot about the security cameras. I took the video of her opening my mailbox - which included her taking all our letters out of the mailbox and rifling through them - and I gave them to the post office. This led to her getting arrested for a second time that week.

After that, we used her two arrests, our collection of security and dashcam footage, and her letter to get a restraining order against her that actually prohibited her from entering her own home, and then we called the police every time we saw her because she was in violation of the order.

She ended up having to live in a hotel room, and her husband came over, apologized to us, and asked if we would drop the restraining order so his wife could come home. I told him I would do it, but only if she wrote me, my wife, our roommates, and the friend of mine she threatened a 1-page apology for her harassment - and that she would promise to never ever contact us again for any reason whatsoever moving forward.

I received no apology, and the house went on the market a week later.

Some f*cking people…

Translating is hard work. Even with pretty simple translations there can be unexpected difficulties if one of the languages has some funny special rules that apply to everyday life like honorifics and proper address, or words with multiple meanings so instead of asking what time it is you’ll end up asking for a potato. A professional translator can deal with this, of course. But for someone who just knows two pretty different languages, translating even something simple suddenly takes time and ends up getting pretty confusing for everyone involved.

And that leads us to ALIENS!

I think we’ve all read one scifi story or another where an alien is explaining some kind of concept that their species has - it might be related to their Special Sense or something else, but they always conveniently manage to put it in words that the character (and the reader) understand. This makes sense from a storytelling viewpoint, because we’re telling the story to human readers/listeners/viewers who need to understand what’s going on and why.

But it might be fun if the character is teamed up with an alien who gets so confused and/or worked up about some trivial translation that it gets turned into this big whole mysterious deal.

Human: “So, what’s this word mean, ‘thnguwe’?”

Alien: “Thnguwe has… special meaning for our people. It refers to a person’s ability to… form a meaningful connection with another of our kind, and our… entire society is built according to the… concept of thnguwe.”

Human: “How profound! Your civilization has much to teach us!”

Alien #2: “It means ‘talking’. Thnguwe means talking.”

Alien #1: “Oh, talking! I forgot what that word was in human language!”

anonymous asked:

long haired yurio.

there he is!