If you are reading this, you are alive. And I am so happy that is the case. However, I know that sometimes it’s hard to feel that way about it yourself. And that’s ok.
You deserve to be alive. I know that’s hard to believe sometimes. Sometimes you finish a day where nothing went right, a day where you made mistakes, a day where things felt like they were falling apart. Despite all of that, you deserve to be here. You learned from those mistakes. You do not have to be perfect.
I love you. And I know I am some invisible, almost nonexistent person behind a purple icon. But know that no matter how low you feel, I love you. And other people do too. And you deserve their love.
Do you ever wonder who would be your godly parent in the pjo universe? Would you be a Roman demigod or a Greek one? (Sorry for the geek question)
ok let’s do this by parts:
i love the sea. i love it since i was a kid. i grew my hair reeeeally long so i could pretend i was ariel. the beach is like my favorite place. i’m brazilian, i go to the beach every year - new year’s eve, especially - so poseidon. plus i have green eyes, i felt a lot closer to percy for that
but people usually say i’m a apollo’s kid. i literally do anything related to art. i draw, paint, sing, write, play a little piano, love acting. and i’m blonde, so
AND my cousin says i’m a zeus kid - she says i’m female version of jason grace, which is like the best complimment i’ve ever heard -. AND my name is juliana, that literally means “daughter of jupiter” ? LIKE
so it’s a very complicated question haha but i think my love for sea/water is stronger that everything, so i go with poseidon
Some advice, please? There is this guy that I really like; we get on so well: easy to talk to, obvious chemistry, etc. We spent 2 weekends together, and then he dropped off the face of the earth. Stopped talking all together. But then came back a few weeks later saying he felt bad, and enjoyed our time together and was just really busy (which I call bullshit on). I just dont know what to do, because i really like him but dont need to be a second rate thought
Ok those last six words say it all babe. You were/are an afterthought to him.
It’s a complete bullshit ploy to get another weekend/date/whatever. No one is “too busy” to drop off the face of the earth w/out notifying you. He’s inconsiderate at best an a manipulative prick at worst.
At what point were you like "imma smoke less"? Also ilysm, you my favorite hoe.
I love you too!!!
I decided to stop smoking less for 2 reasons: #1, I started using drugs (in general) as a way to numb myself and stop feeling my emotions and #2, I wasn’t being as productive with my time. There came a point where I just realized that all I ever was was sad, and while I thought doing something that made me happy to begin with was making me feel better, I was LITERALLY just running away from my problems. Its weird because the last time I smoked weed, I just kept seeing all my negative thoughts and experiences all around me and felt like I was so clouded. I literally had a panic attack and felt so suffocated, and thats kinda what made me realize I need to stop. You also have to realize that I made the mistake of doing LITERALLY EVERY DRUG EVER FUCKCKFKF (except meth n heroin and ok maybe im over-exaggerating) and that probably fucked me up at the time too. Secondly, as I mentioned in the last ask, sitting around and doing nothing is the same thing as sitting around and doing nothing while being stoned. I needed to be productive and change my life for the better.
Been 2 years since I smoked. Feels pretty fuckin good to know that I’ve definitely changed my life since then and found the difference between trying to be a wannabe instagram baddie and someone who’s just trying to experience and get better insight on the world, yknow? However, now that I’m at a place where I’ve recovered from my terrible mindset, who knows if I’ll smoke again in the future (◡‿◡✿)
what the FUCK on g-ds green earth is this! theres a bun in there. cheese . MEAT. and youre putting it in ice cream youre just chopping it up and putting it in ice cream!! youre going to have ground beef ice cream with cheese and soggy bread. WHY would you do this. i am REPULSED on a level ive never felt before. like oh yum mcicecream! why dont you mix a filet o fish in there while youre at it? theres fucking ketchup on there too. i can never go back to a state of not having seen this video and i mourn that. im going to be thinking on this video on my deathbed. my last words are going to be “hamburger ice cream” what the fuck
WARNING: SMUT!!!! This is not for kids (But are any of my imagines tho?)
Being Joker’s girlfriend wasn’t easy, but I loved it. I loved spending time with him, stand by his side and feel special. He made me feel like I was one in a billion. Even tho he could be scary and really crazy, I loved him. Most people feared Joker for his behaviour which was good, but I knew him better. We’ve been together for just a few weeks, but it was enough. He was crazy and I was crazy, a perfect mixture for Gotham city. A crazy couple that likes to play with Batsy. We had a lot of fun, but then came the more personal part.
I was still a virgin.
The fact had made me nervous and to be honest I was scared. Joker wasn’t a gentle man, he was more dominating. I knew he had a rough grip so I was stressed about when the time would come. I was mentally ready, but I was just scared as heck. My old friends had told me that they were in pain, that it stung and some of them even bled. Knowing Joker he wouldn’t be any gentler than an ordinary guy, perhaps he was worse.
Damn he didn’t even know. I had always came up with an excuse like ‘I’m on my periods’ ‘the wounds I got from the heist hurt’ or ‘I’m tired, sorry’ when he tried to take kissing a step further. Now he probably suspected something, which was ok. I knew I should tell him.
It was Valentine’s day, 10 p.m. and he would come home anytime soon. I had been up all day as he was on a heist with Frost. I had stayed on purpose, trying to prepare myself. Joker was surprised when I a blood thirsty little monster didn’t come with him to kill a few people who didn’t pay him back. While he was gone from the luxurious penthouse, I was thinking. I knew that I’d give him my virginity tonight. So I had taken a warm bath, I read loads of blogs where people talked about losing it. It was the same pain and blood kind of shit. But then I saw more positive posts. Some said that foreplay and lube could make it better. Also not everyone would bleed. So I felt a little better.
I sighed and grabbed my laptop. Then I sat down on our bed, on the dark purple sheets and I sat comfortably. Then I opened a tab and decided to do something I didn’t do that often, but I felt like I had to. If Joker would catch me, I’d be so embarrassed. I watched some more mature videos, yes porn. To be honest it was kinda hot and impressive how these people did all that. Maybe one day J could take me like that? Damn it was a thrilling thought. I got so lost in my thoughts by watching the video that I forgot to follow the time. The volume was quite high and a girl was moaning really heavily. I bet her moans were echoing through the house. I just watched keenly, slowly getting wet.
Then I heard footsteps coming closer loudly. My eyes widened and my breath hitched in my throat. Before I could sit up, Joker walked in with a gun in his hand. There was an angry look on his face. My heart jumped to my throat and I froze on the bed. ‘’Oh’’ He muttered and lowered the gun. Instead of being angry, he smirked. ‘’Is my kitten horny?’’ He purred at me. He still had his silver jacket on. He probably thought that something was happening here so he just hurried to me. A blush spread on my face and I shut the tab and then put the computer away. Way to go.
‘’We need to talk’’ I cleared my throat and looked away from my boyfriend. It was really embarrassing to be caught watching porn. ‘’Hmm I’d love to talk’’ Joker told me deeply and crawled in bed next to me. I noticed that I got tense. He grabbed my jaw and made me look at him. His usually ice blue eyes were dark and his pupils were bigger than normal. ‘’I should..um..there’s..can you..no do you want to..ugh..’’ I wanted to tell him about my virginity, but I was so nervous that I didn’t make sense. I stopped stuttering when he put his fingers on my lips. ‘’Do you want me to fuck you?’’ He asked me shamelessly. My eyes widened a bit and I felt like I was a heat lamp by now. Why was this so bad?
‘’Kinda.. yes’’ I whispered and watched how his smirk turned into a grin. ‘’But there’s something..you should know’’ I hurried to say before he got started. Joker nodded and waited for me to tell him. I took a deep breath and reminded myself that it was ok. He should know. ‘’I’ve..I’ve never done this before’’ I spat it out shyly and expected him to laugh, but nope, he didn’t laugh. ‘’I figured’’ He replied calmly. I looked at him with surprise. Before I could ask him how, he kept going. ‘’You always had an excuse kitten. You could have just told me’’ He let me know and climbed above me. I looked into his eyes quietly. Joker sat on my hips, but he put most of his weight on his legs.
‘’Sorry’’ I apologized for not telling him earlier. ‘’Hmm..it’s ok. But why didn’t you tell me kitten? Why’’ He pried while taking off his silver jacket, revealing his red shirt that wasn’t buttoned. I saw his toned chest and to be honest I liked that sight. ‘’I was scared’’ I admitted, knowing that being honest with him was the best choice. Joker took off his shirt as well before he leaned closer to my face. ‘’Why were you scared?’’ He purred quietly and cupped my face. I put my hands on his and took a deep breath, noticing how his scent of gunpowder and cologne calmed me down.
‘’I was scared because I know it hurts..and it’s kinda embarrassing’’ I admitted, finding it hard to speak when he started kissing my neck. J licked my skin and then started kissing me until he found my sweet spot. I whimpered,but muffled it by biting my lips together. ‘’It’s not embarrassing’’ He told me seriously before looking back into my eyes.This side of him wasn’t really familiar for me. He wasn’t angry nor overly happy and cheerful. He seemed like he genuinely cared about my safety. But there was also that smirk there since he caught he watching that video.
‘’You know I won’t hurt you right?’’ He whispered into my ear. I licked my lips and closed my eyes for a while. ‘’..unless you want me to’’ He added darkly, but I knew what he meant with that. ‘’I trust you J’’ I let him know. All this got me hornier and I just wanted to get started. I felt impatient, but also shy and vulnerable. ‘’Look at me’’ He demanded and so I opened my eyes. His face was right above mine. ‘’I’ll take care of you. Why would I ever want to hurt my queen?’’ He looked at me seriously, but he didn’t seem angry. I cracked a smile and it was enough for an answer.
Then J pressed his red lips against mine. I relaxed into the kiss and shut my eyes again, kissing him harder. Joker opened his mouth a little so he could push his tongue out. I gave him access to my mouth and then he started exploring me like never before. His hand travelled down on my body so he was cupping my right boob. I tensed as he touched me and of course he noticed. J pulled back and looked deep in my eyes. ‘’Relax kitten’’ He demanded calmly. I nodded and took a deep breath.
Then he grabbed the hems of my black shirt that I was wearing and he dragged it up until I was shirtless. I watched as he threw the shirt away somewhere on the wooden floor. The cool air made contact on my skin and I felt goosebumps rising. Then J got up, standing next to the bed. He unbuckled his belt and got out of his black jeans. I was wearing golden pajama shorts and black underwear. When I saw J in his boxers, I realized that this was real. He had a boner and man it looked huge. How could all that fit inside me?
‘’What did you think of when you watched it baby?’’ He broke the silence and got on the bed again. I sat up next to him and sighed. Was it so obvious that I had been thinking of him? Of us doing those things? ‘’You’’ I replied shortly. J put his hands on my shorts and dragged them off, making me raise my legs so he could take them all the way off. Now we were both in our underwear only. I couldn’t help but to be nervous, but I was getting really wet. ‘’Mmh baby..’’ He growled with a smile and suddenly dragged me on his lap. I put my hands on his muscled shoulders and bit my bottom lip.His grip was strong, but sure. I liked it.
‘’I’ve thought about you very very much baby..About you and me, together’’ He purred and then his hands played with my bra. He unclasped them and I felt them hanging by the straps. He had never seen me buttnaked before, but I didn’t mind that he would now. Then he slid them off of me and threw them away as well. My nipples were hard and I knew he noticed. I mean, my boobs were nearly in his face. ‘’You’ve got really nice tits’’ he smirked and cupped both of them. Then he gave them a squeeze, making me flinch because the sensitivity came so suddenly. ‘’I know you like them because you’re always staring’’ I chuckled and tried to feel comfortable. I wasn’t uncomfortable either, just nervous.
‘’Have you touched yourself?’’ J asked me seriously and then licked my left nipple. I bit my bottom lip and nearly moaned when he blew cold air on the spot before nibbling me with his teeth. He used his hand on the other one so I wouldn’t feel lonely. ‘’Tell me’’ He reminded me and kept going. As I opened my mouth to speak, he bit me a little harder, making me moan. ‘’That’s my girl, don’t hold it back’’ He let me know more happily. ‘’Now tell me, have you ever touched yourself while thinking of us?’’ He wanted to know very eagerly. It made me think of the few times I had done that. It had all been very recently. He was making me a horny mess.
‘’Yes J mmh’’ I whimpered, getting wet for him. Then I looked at my horny boyfriend who got a dangerous dark twist in those pretty eyes. ‘’Dirty dirty girl’’ He rumbled deeply. Then he used his mouth on my other boob. I leaned closer to him so his face was hugging them. I wanted to get some friction, but I was patient enough. I knew that foreplay was important so it wouldn’t hurt so much. His warm hands squeezed my boobs a little harder, making me jump a little every time, but I liked the feeling. Suddenly he pinched both my nipples, making me gasp. ‘’I need to punish you for being a naughty girl, but not tonight’’ He warned me and then moved his hands on my back, sliding them down until he clutched my bum. He did it to press our clothed crotches closer. Then he leaned back against the bedpost and attached his lips on my neck.
‘’Damn..I can feel how wet you are’’ J admitted and grinded his hard on against me. My eyes nearly rolled to the back of my head from the unfamiliar touch, but the feeling it made. My clit was pulsing by now because I was so eager for his touch. ‘’Oh baby girl..how long have you been waiting for me?’’ He licked his lips and kept planting kisses on my neck and chest. ‘’A few hours’’ I answered shortly, focusing on the small amount of friction that felt good already.
‘’Maybe..just maybe I won’t tease you too much now’’ He thought out loud. Then he rolled us over so he was on top. I looked into his eyes and now it was my turn to smirk. ‘’It must be tight in those boxers J’’ I whispered and touched his back with my nail, gently tho. ‘’Trust me, it is’’ He growled and then pressed his crotch against mine again, way harder than earlier because he was on top now. As I was about to moan, he pressed those sweet lips of his against mine, making me moan into his mouth. He grabbed my hair with his left hand to keep me steady. The feeling of him dry humping me was so good after waiting so long.
Then he let go of my lips, looking into my eyes silently for a while. He was probably finding it hard to keep control over his actions. ‘’Daddy’s hungry’’ He let me know. At first I didn’t get it, but I was quick to catch on. J went down on me and soon he bit my last piece of clothing, my undies. I watched as he slid them off very slowly, keeping eye contact while teasing the hell out of me. ‘’J’’ I whined impatiently, but couldn’t help but to admit that it was hot. His hands touched my thighs and then moved closer again. He moved his eyes away from my eyes to look at my heat. I felt a little shy and embarrassed again. No one had ever been this close to me.
‘’Oh you’re glistening..something needs to be done here’’ He purred excitedly and placed a kiss on my inner thigh. I squeezed the bedsheets and waited for him to do something. I didn’t even realize that I was holding my breath until he told me. ‘’Relax kitten, I’ll make you feel good’’ He promised me. I let out a long breath and then encouraged him with a smile. ‘’Please daddy’’ I begged him. Something twisted in his eyes and his grip got tighter, but I didn’t feel any pain. Then he licked my pussy slowly, from my clit to my opening. I gasped and then held my breath for a few seconds. J didn’t stop now. He kitten licked my wetness and then attached his mouth of my throbbing clit. I moaned loudly in pleasure. It didn’t hurt, yet.
J nibbled my clit with his teeth and made me arch my back. He put his right arm on my hips to keep me on place. ‘’Damn baby you taste so good’’ He complimented me and kept licking my clit. ‘’harder J’’ I whimpered, wanting more. I wanted him to take me harder. It was probably because I was so horny. ‘’Baby girl..I feel like after a few times you’ll be one feisty beast in bed’’ He chuckled and then pushed his index finger inside of me. He had long and kinda thick fingers. I had never felt that before from anyone else than myself and I had smaller fingers.
I chewed my bottom lip and whimpered as he started fingering me. It hurt a little, but it felt so good as well. Then I moved my hand to touch his arm he used to keep my hips down. J looked at my face to see if I was in any kind of discomfort. He wasn’t smiling and he had a dark look on his smug face, but I could tell he was both happy but worried. He truly cared about me. ‘’Does my kitten enjoy this?’’ He purred and curled his long finger against me soft walls, hitting a spot that made me moan loudly. He noticed and kept pressing his finger against that magic spot.
‘’Y-Yes’’ I answered him and tried to buck my hips, but it was useless. Suddenly he grabbed my hand and intertwined our fingers while using his other hand to pleasure me. Once he pulled out his finger, he pushed back two. This time he had more difficulties getting both in smoothly. I gulped and realized that it hurt a little. J saw it on my face and he stopped. ‘’Relax’’ He reminded me and used his thumb to rub my clit. ‘’Keep going’’ I told him a little unsurely. He listened to me and fingered me with two fingers, but he couldn’t get both fully in. My head leaned against the pillows and I squeezed his hand, but I still moaned out in both pleasure and pain. Soon he managed to get both fingers in and he pressed the magic spot again.
‘’Fuck yes’’ I breathed out sharply. ‘’It wasn’t that hard to find’’ He told me proudly. I guess the magic spot was my G-spot. He was still slow with his fingers, but I wanted more now that I got more used to it. I wanted to feel him in me, to be connected with him. ‘’J’’ I whispered nervously and looked into his dark eyes. ‘’Yes baby?’’ He answered quickly and stopped moving his fingers. I felt how my juices stained the sheets. I couldn’t help but to think of the chance of bleeding.
‘’I want you’’ I told him honestly. J pulled out his fingers and climbed closer to my face. ‘’Do you want me now?’’ He questioned me with his sexy raspy voice and touched my bottom lips with the fingers he just used to finger fuck me with. I nodded and opened my mouth so I could taste myself. J pushed his fingers in my mouth and I sucked them clean. ‘’I’ll get a condom’’ He let me know. J pressed a kiss on my stomach, making me smile, before he got up. He walked to the dark brown drawer and opened it, grabbing a condom. Reality hit me again. This was it. I just hoped that he managed to remain as calm as possible. J wasn’t normal, but I couldn’t be happier to share this moment with him. No one else could replace him, never ever in a gazillion years.
J took off his boxers and then I saw his cock. My eyes widened. Now it looked even bigger. Pre-cum was dripping from his tip. He was stone hard. It would be a miracle if this wouldn’t hurt. I mean I barely managed two of his fingers and now that? He was at least nine inches long, at least! ‘’Do you want to put it on?’’ J asked me, knocking me out of my thoughts. He had holding the condom near me. I grabbed it from his hand and then ripped the small package open, revealing a slimy piece of rubber that would keep us away from infections and kids.
Then I looked at his cock. Was I supposed to touch him? What if I’d screw up? J noticed that I was staring, so he decided to speak. ‘’You’re adorable’’ He chuckled and then grabbed my wrist, bringing my hand close to his erection. My hands were trembling because I was so nervous, but damn I wanted this. ‘’Um..How do I know when it’s right?’’ I mumbled, feeling like my brain was running in circles. ‘’I’ll know, just roll it on’’ He encouraged me. His voice was raspier than normally. I grabbed his shaft and tried to keep a gentle touch. I had no idea if it hurt or what it felt like for him. Then I put the condom on his tip and tried to remember what I had learned earlier. I pinched the tip while rolling it on. Then I let go and looked at J for approval.
‘’Good, was it so hard?’’ J asked me and licked his lips. I shook my head no, but to be honest I just wanted to begin. ‘’Now baby girl you need to relax, okay?’’ He looked deep in my eyes while making me lie down on my back. ‘’I will’’ I promised him and took a shaky breath. Joker grabbed my legs and put them on his shoulders. Then he positioned himself close to my entrance, letting the tip touch me but he didn’t push in yet. My nerves were about to kill me.
‘’Hey, look at me’’ J demanded and I was quick to do so. He grabbed my hand and looked deep into my eyes. ‘’Do it’’ I whispered and prepared myself for the pain. I gritted my teeth as he pushed his length inside of me, stretching my walls that had never experienced this. First I couldn’t feel pain, until he got an inch or two in. ‘’Fuck’’ I hissed nervously and tensed my muscles.J stopped and clenched his jaw. This wasn’t easy for him either. ‘’Y/N, take it easy baby’’ He reminded me. Tears stung my eyes, but it was mostly because of my nerves. I had been thinking too much all day and this was the moment all that stress and worry came out. It didn’t hurt so much that I couldn’t handle it.
‘’You’re doing good, now be a good girl for daddy and relax’’ J spoke slowly, but deeply. I nodded and relaxed after taking a deep breath.He kept going slowly. I felt the struggle, since everything was so tight down there. J never broke eye-contact while he entered me. Then as I thought things wouldn’t get worse, I felt a stinging pain. ‘’Ow ow ow’’ I whined and gritted my teeth. J didn’t stop, he kept pushing himself in. I knew that he had torn my hymen. ‘’I know it hurts baby,but it’ll be over soon’’ He promised me seriously. The tears rolled down my face, but I didn’t sob. Then he cupped my cheek and wiped away a tear with his thumb. I liked J like this, which I never expected.
Soon he was all the way in. J stopped, wanting me to adjust to his size. I was breathing heavily because my nerves were unravelling. It stung and hurt as my walls stretched, but it didn’t get any worse. Actually now that he wasn’t moving, it didn’t hurt too much. ‘’You’re doing so good’’ J purred and tried to stay still. Man he had been weeks without sex and now he had to contain himself, which was a hard task for Joker. I was so glad that he cared about me enough to not hurt me on purpose.
‘’Move’’ I whispered after a while. He nodded and pulled back. I gritted my teeth, but tried to stay relaxed as he moved. J was almost all the way out until he pushed back in, this time a little faster without stopping. I grunted in pain but the pleasure made it bearable. J growled under his breath. I untangled our hands so I could hug him by putting my hands on his strong back. J supported himself a little better now and found a better position. Soon he was finding a slow but steady rhythm. One more single tear rolled down my face until I started to find pleasure coming above the pain. I moaned quite loudly now, allowing J to know that the worst pain was over. He smiled, but it quickly faded as he started to pace up.
My nails raked his back without me noticing. ‘’Fuck J’’ I cried out in pleasure. The feeling was new but so lovely. His big cock rubbed my soft and sensitive walls by every move and once he was in me, his tip hit the magic spot that made my eyes roll to the back of my head. ‘’Do you feel good?’’ He asked me darkly and he gritted his teeth. We were both getting sweaty, but neither of us minded. ‘’Y-Y..ah fuck yes!’’ I wailed out happily. J started breathing heavily and so did I, but I was a moaning mess as well. I bucked my hips against J’s to get more friction. I wanted him to go faster and not be so careful anymore. Just like I read the pain goes away after a few minutes. Now I felt simply amazing.
‘’Faster..’’ I whispered quietly, but he didn’t quite catch it. I knew he wanted to go slow to keep me safe which was sweet. J probably found this hard, since he actually gave a fuck about me. I knew how to make him take me harder tho. ‘’Fuck me harder daddy’’I told him loudly. J slowed down until he stopped. My ass was wet because I was legit dripping arousal. J put his hand on my jaw and looked into my eyes seriously. ‘’Y/N..don’t get me to the point where I can’t control myself’’ He warned me, but I knew he wanted it. Me being the crazy girl who didn’t follow rules anyway did something else.
‘’I know you want to..I can take you daddy’’ I purred and bucked my hips, already missing the feeling of him fucking me. I wanted more. I didn’t even care if it hurt a little bit. ‘’Y/N’’ J growled and shut his eyes. I smirked, knowing that I got him. ‘’I’m all yours daddy, look at me’’ I said innocently. When he opened his eyes I used my left hand to touch my clit. J looked at my actions for a few seconds until he lost it. He grabbed my wrist harshly and pinned it next to my head. ‘’Oh darling you’ll cry soon’’ He warned me angrily. Finally.
Before I could answer, he grabbed the bedpost and let his anger out on me, just as I expected him to. J pounded himself balls deep in me, making the sound of skin slapping against skin echo in our room and probably the entire penthouse.’’Yes..Yes daddy’’ I gasped and rolled my eyes to the back of my head again. Then I curled my toes and felt a knot forming in my stomach. J was going really hard, harder now that I thought he would. ‘’Is this what you wanted?’’ He growled heatedly. I couldn’t even answer him. The pleasure and pain mixed together had me overwhelmed. My mouth was open and I was gasping between my loud cries of pleasure. The look in J’s eyes was so sexy but dangerous.
I had awakened a beast.
J kept slamming his entire length in me, until a strong feeling seemed to come closer. I guess I was close to an orgasm. Although I also read that most women don’t come the first time, or even the first few times. ‘’J’’ I tried to say his name, but it came out as a whisper. J growled and kept doing this hard work. A shiver ran down my spine and I struggled to breathe. It felt so good. ‘’J’’ I tried again and it came out a little louder. ‘’You’re close, I know’’ he let me know. Tomorrow would be a day I’d find it hard to walk. I just felt it.
As the feeling grew stronger, tears stung my eyes again. I wanted to let go so bad, but I found it hard. I blinked, letting the tears wash down my face. But the roughness was fucking amazing. I knew I wasn’t normal. ‘’Ah-’’ I screamed, but fell silent as a wave of pleasure washed across my entire body, feeling like a good slap. It’s like all my other senses numbed down, only allowing me to feel the amazing feeling. It made my abdomen muscles tense. I curled my toes and used my free hand to dig my nails into J’s back.
After a while I came back to my senses, still feeling like heaven, but something unexpected happened. I got super sensitive. It’s like every move J did was like twenty times more sensitive. ‘’J’’ I whimpered, still recovering from that hard orgasm. He didn’t stop yet. I screamed out and my body started shaking. I was pushing him, but I wanted more. I wanted this, but my body couldn’t handle much more. J noticed and then stopped. He pulled out and put my legs down. I squeezed them together, panting hard on the bed now. J took off the condom and I watched as he came seconds later. His cum cum shot on my body, landing on my stomach. His entire hot load just pooled on my skin as I panted.
For some reason I liked that dirty sight of being covered in his cum. But now I felt like I was on fire, but it was so worth it. J was breathing heavily and he ran his hand through his hair. I cracked a smile and I looked at my boyfriend. Suddenly I felt much closer to him, it’s like we were more serious. ‘’Thank you’’ I whispered tiredly, but I was so happy. J looked into my eyes more calmly now. ‘’Well it’s not over yet doll face. I need to run you a bath, you’re bleeding’’ He let me know. My eyes widened. Then I sat up, ignoring the burning sensation. He was right. There was a little blood on the sheets. Fuck.
I wasn’t sure if he was angry or not, but I still grew nervous.’’Shit sorry..I-I’ll clean up’’ I promised him quickly. Before I could panic more, J cupped my face and kissed me. It took me by surprise, but I kissed him back. The kiss was sweet and salty, but it sure calmed me down. Then J grabbed my wrists and let me put my hands on his chest. ‘’Oh kitten just take it easy, it’s fine. Daddy isn’t mad at you’’ He assured me. ‘’I lov..’’ I started, but quickly shut up. His smile faded. Joker never told anyone those three words, at least not that I knew of it. He knew how to show his emotions, especially when he got protective over me or when he wanted to spend time with me. He knew it as well ,but so far he had never said that he loved me. I was kinda nervous now. Everything went well, but I went and tried to say those words to him.
Way to go.
‘’I loved it’’ I cleared my throat, talking about the sex. Maybe he’d think through it. J sighed and then stood up. I thought he’d leave me alone, but instead he picked me up in his strong arms. So he carried me to the master bathroom. ‘’I know what you were going to say Y/N’’ he admitted ,but I was unsure if he was angry at me or not. He wasn’t obvious like an open book. No, Joker was a nut that was hard to crack, but I was going the right way. ‘’Sorry’’ I whispered and looked down. He put me on my feet and locked the white bathroom door. My legs were numb, kinda feeling like jelly. So I sat on the edge of the tub quickly. Then I watched as J let the warm water fill the big tub, big enough for two.
‘’Don’t be sorry’’ He started a little angrily. Well sherlock it wasn’t easy not to be. I didn’t want to ruin a perfect night with my own stupid feelings in words. J kneeled down in front of me and rested his head on my knees. ‘’Do you mean it?’’ He wanted to know. A blush spread on my already rosy cheeks. Then I nodded, a little scared if I had to be honest. Instead of getting mad at me like I expected him to be, instead of hitting me neither, he did the opposite.
‘’Well..I think that’s good, so I know our feelings are mutual’’ He let me know mysteriously. Just as I expected, he wouldn’t say ‘I love you’ but he found a way to let me know.
- this helps me so so so much. I start thinking my languages when I complain about my cats when they’re being annoying.
✏️ Keep Yourself Interested
- It’s hard work to learn a language. Find ways to keep yourself entertained. Aesthetic notes, fan fiction or buying your favorite books in your language is helpful.
- this shit is so helpful. look up videos, listen to music, watch stupid challenge videos, it’ll immerse you into the language.
✏️ Pocket Dictionaries
- I have a whole self of german dictionaries (thanks mom), and honestly, it’s so helpful to look through them. Keep them on hand to find words that you don’t know
✏️ Accept Mistakes
- You’re learning an entirely new way to communicate. Honestly, you’ll make a lot of mistakes. When you accept it, it becomes less traumatizing to mess up
✏️ Change your phone and games
- Ok, I didn’t wanna do this, but I did. The moment I switched my phone to french, oh my god, it was so immersive. I didn’t even know how much time i spent reading on my phone until I switched. I did switch back, and I felt less immersed. So honestly, it helps. I’m an active Minecraft player, so I changed my game to French. Holy fuck did that help.
✏️ Take notes ALL THE TIME
- Find a quote you like? write it down. Find a new word? write it down. Song? WRITE THAT SHIT DOWN.
✏️ Tumblr blogs are helpful
- I follow a les mis blog that posts about the french election in french and honestly, seeing memes and slang in french is so helpful, like yes.
Not all of these will work for you, but they help for me, so I hope that you benefit from this.
Warning: Spoilers! And I wrote this on the spur, so there might be grammatical errors.
1. I enjoyed the story. Yeah, people will say it recycles from the trilogy, but come on, people. Why are you surprised? Bioware recycles their plotlines all the time. It’s pretty much the same in all of their games. A protagonist gains special abilities and leads a Ragtag Bunch of Misfits team to defeat a big threat. And I’m not bothered by that. Sometimes familiarity in your franchise is good, just as long as you do new things to the formula, and I think they do.
What interested me the most was the theme of starting over. A lot of people in the Andromeda Initiative were former criminals or outcasts. The reason they joined was to start a new life, and it’s explored in the main questlines, the loyalty quests, and numerous side quests. I was worried about the game talking about colonization since humans are looking for a new home, but I was pleasantly surprised that the game made it clear that Andromeda is the angara’s home first, and humans and other Milky Way species will have to work with them. Thank god! No Mightey Whitey trope this time!
2. Ryder as the player character. I honestly never thought I would love Ryder as much as I did when I played the game. Sure, no one will ever replace Commander Shepard, but Ryder isn’t meant to replace the Commander, rather show a different perspective in a new story. Commander Shepard is the hero we want to be while Ryder is more of a relatable character. Ryder has to learn through the entire game how to be a leader while going through the obstacles of their inexperience and youth so people will take them seriously. And it was compelling, uplifting, and at times amusing to see them become a hero in their own right and step out of their father’s shadow.
Also Sara and Scott felt like their own person. In the original trilogy, the player character is pretty much the same no matter what gender. But sometimes the dialogue can be different depending on if you play a male Ryder or a female Ryder. That’s because they are two different people who have had their own experiences and personalities. That really adds to the replay value!
3. Female aliens everywhere! One of my major issues with the original trilogy was the lack of female Turians, krogans, and salarians. Sure we had asari an all-female race, and female quarians, but it felt weird that we met so many aliens with very few ladies. Not only do we get a female Turian squadmate, we also get plenty of lady alien NPCs gathered everywhere for random quests. We also have Kesh who works at the Nexus. And we get to see female salarians! And they kind of look the same as male salarians except with different voices. Thank god! It would’ve been horrifying to see salarians with boobs. Uh! And I’m pretty sure there were just as many female angara NPCs as there were males.
4. The romances. Especially the queer ones. One of the things I love about Bioware games are the romance paths. Bonus points if there is a queer option. And as of patch 1.08, this game has the most number of queer romances in any Bioware game. I think my two favorite romance paths are with Sara and Vetra and Jaal and Scott. While representation for the LGBT community is improving in media, there’s no denying we still have a long way to go. And after again the crap year 2016 where we had a huge number of queer women characters die in tv shows, it was so wonderful to have a healthy and happy relationship between two women when I first played the game. And even if it wasn’t added until the patch, the romance between Jaal and Scott is absolutely sweet since we see two men show a lot of love and affection for each other which is rare to see in media.
5. The Tempest Family. I adore every single character on the Tempest, and they really did feel like a family once you played further into the game. I am a sucker for found families, and to see these people who are trying to find a home ending up finding a home with each other just gives me so many feels!
Since there’s not really a huge crew in the ship like in the original trilogy when Shepard had an army of humans. In Andromeda, we have six squad mates, four additional crew members, and Ryder. And I think it made the family more intimate. It’s like our own little family lives on the Tempest.
Also I liked how there were more quests spread out throughout the game with the squad which I think was lacking in Inquisition. Plus. Movie Night is the best scene ever!
6. In my opinion, the side quests were fun. I think this was one thing they improved from Inquisition. Inquisition side quests just felt like a bunch of fetch quests that got kind of boring pretty quick, and didn’t really add to the overall story. Some highlights from Andromeda were: Kadara, the angara reincarnation questline, the Turian jailed for murder, the anti-AI group, meeting Zaeed’s son, and those kids sending out a distress signal for a new light for their weed plant. HAHA!
They were compelling in their own right and included cut scenes instead of the Inquisitor going to some location like in Skyrim to do a thing come back to the quest giver saying, “I did the thing.” “Ok, good.”
7. Unlike in Inquisition, there’s actual payoff for some of the quests you do. I don’t mean to be mean to Inquisition, I still love the game, but remember when we were promised that you had to build your forces up in order to defend against the main threat. Yeah, you built forces to get influence points to gain perks, and that’s it.
In Andromeda, while, yes. It’s not the same level as Mass Effect 2. When you actually complete quests and help out leaders, you can get different results during the final battle. Like, there’s a chance Captain Dunn may not survive.
Also, when you get 100% viability on all the planets, you get a special surprise on Habitat 7- being told that it will one day be habitable because of our efforts. Sure it was a side quest, but it just felt so rewarding!
8. The climax was actually fulfilling and exciting. Again, something else Inquisition was lacking in. Seriously, when I first played Andromeda, I legit gasped when the archon was taking control of SAM node. The villain was actually living up to his threatening nature!
Just when we think we got everything under control, and are about to find Meridian, the Archon fucks shit up, and our sibling has to step up to save the day. Then we have to gather people we helped out and prepare for a final battle, and Ryder can finally prove themselves as a true Pathfinder and kick the Archon’s ass once and for all. People are saying the ending was as disappointing as ME3’s? Pfft…What are you even talking about?
9. The angara. Bioware never fails to make me love an entire fictional species. Yeah, it feels a bit off that they pretty much have the same faces and the same 3 voice actors, but I really do love their culture.And I appreciate that they were clearly coded as POC while Andromeda didn’t go through with the whole Mighty Whitey Trope. The game wants you to respect their culture and to respect their home.
I love the angaran people are open about their feelings, I love how their religion believes in reincarnation, I love how we see angaran scientists, soldiers, merchants, mercenaries, and civilians. Also Aya and Hivraal are absolutely gorgeous!
And when Jaal finds out his people were created by the Kett, I was worried it was going to go the Dalish elves route, but Jaal points out that it doesn’t change anything about the angara. They are still their own people. And that was such an uplifting message.
10. The overall light-hearted tone. I wrote a small post that got a good number of notes. (Probably the biggest number I’ve ever gotten), so to quote: “There was always this sense of hope and optimism about finding a new home. ‘Yeah, things may have gone totally wrong, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make them better’ was the overall message I got.
And really, with so many bad things happening in the world right now and too much of our entertainment supposedly being our escapism being dark for the sake of dark, this was something I think a lot of us needed.”
Mass Effect 3 had its light-hearted moments, and I love it, but man, that game was emotional draining.
It’s a bit discouraging to love something so much and get recommended videos on youtube pointing out the same flaws of that certain game, and why they thought it was a huge disappointment. Do I agree with some of their criticisms? Sure. Does the history behind the production explain the flaws? Oh absolutely.
But people seem to forget that the original Mass Effect trilogy wasn’t without its flaws. I mean, sure everyone can agree on the Mass Effect 3 ending, but I could make a list of all the issues I have with the other Bioware games including Dragon Age: Inquisition (which despite winning Game of the Year, kind of suffers the same problems Andromeda had).
So yeah, after the crap year of 2016, I was so excited to get a newly-released game that made me happy. And still makes me happy, and makes me in the mood to play another Ryder.
what do u think would happen if jeremy walked into the bathroom while michael was crying (like during the party)
OK SO i asked em ( aka @gayradwhitedad ) to help me with this ask and they came up with some really good headcanons ( like wtf they’re the best ) and i drew some of them so!!! the drawings are here and the headcanons are under the cut ( PLEASE READ THE WHOLE THING, IT’S SO GOOD )
You and Jin were going your normal pace to the sweet music playing in the background until you got close. He felt the change in you and began going faster. You were so close, but something was different. He would be surprised at first when you told him something was weird, but when you squirted he got intrigued. “Do you think I can make you do that again?”
He kept going harder and harder, while your moans continued to get louder and louder, until he felt you tighten around his cock. He buried himself in you only to be sprayed by your squirt. “Oh my god. I’m so sorry Joon. That’s never happened before.” You said as he collapsed on top of you. “Well it definitely wont be the last.”
You were riding Yoongi as normal, because he was to tired to put much effort in, but still wanted to enjoy himself. You began moaning louder and throwing your head back. As of a minute ago you were in control of, tempo, roughness, and everything really, but that all changed when Yoongi saw you in so much pleasure. He quickly grabbed you back pulling you toward him as he began to ram into you. You felt so good that when your orgasm hit you squirted. Yoongi, having never made you do that before was confused and worried. “Did I hurt you (Y/N)? Are you Ok?” You could barley get out an exhausted “Amazing”
When you got home you barely had enough tome to put your purse down when Hoseok attacked you and pushed you against the wall. His hand was already down your pants before you could ask “Looks like somebody missed me today.” You said getting pulled into a heated kiss. he began to pump his fingers in and put of you while simultaneously rubbing your clit. This had you all fired up and when you were close you let him know. With this information he went faster sending you flying off the edge and squirting on to his hand. “Damn baby girl that’s fucking hot. Wanna continue in the bed room.”
(This GIF is pure sin)
It had started as a night in with your boyfriend Jimin while you watched movies and ate snacks. Apparently Jimin had other plans when he began to kiss down your neck and chest slowly making his way to your lady region. He pulled away your pajama shorts and went to town with those gloriously luscious lips. This soon had you throwing your head back, and clenching on nothing. Soon you couldn’t hold back anymore and you squirted. You felt embarrassed because you had just done this all over Jimin’s face when he looked up at you,licked his lips and said, “It’s all right baby. I love the way you taste.”
When you said you were in the mood you didn’t have to tell him twice. Taehyung began to pound into you with breaks of slow and sensual. He loved teasing you like this but when you looked him in the eyes and then moaned he went crazy. He began to drill into you with no specific pattern or tempo. This soon sent you way over the edge and you squirted. Even though Taehyung had never seen you do that before he wasn’t surprised. “That’s right only I can make you feel that way, and make you do that.”
Two words. Confused bun. While y’all were in the heat of the moment he noticed you getting closer and closer. So was he so he decided to speed things up a little. He was so prepared for you to lose your cool and moan his name, but when you squirted instead. He became confused. “Why hasn’t that happened before?” He would ask. “Because it’s never been this good before.”
7 PEOPLE I WANT TO BECOME IN 2017
1. The accountable and responsible grown up who doesn’t let pride come before reliability.
2. The girl who wakes up at the same time every morning and uses a planner and checks her calendar before making commitments.
3. The girl who drinks coffee when it’s convenient on a day out in a cafe or on a study day, not as a daily drug. The girl who drinks water every day and only drinks water.
4. An unapologetic warrior. The type who doesn’t feel weak for having bottled up emotions and doesn’t feel like a child being teased for everything. The type who is blunt and honest and confident enough to make anyone who questions her question why they ever felt it was ok to do so.
5. The girl who works out 5 times a week no matter what time of year it is or what sport season it is. Working out is for me not for the team. I can be a healthy and active person all year round and lend my commitment to sports when it’s time.
6. The girl who makes her bed and does one thing every day. A day wasted in bed is a day someone else could have lived better. Someone else always wishes they had the resources and opportunities in my hands and a day wasted in bed dishonors my past and future.
7. The girl who is hopeful. Hopeful for a better tomorrow every day and hopeful for all of the horrible weighing troubles to ease.
me and my gf Sam for #lesbianvisibilityday !! We are not only a very cute lesbian couple, but also both dedicated creators of LGBT work!
Sam is the author of the Dragonoak series, a high fantasy trilogy which features a lesbian protagonist and cast (pictured in the middle image, which I drew! I draw a LOT of lesbians, that’s p much my thing.)
We actually originally found each other because of our individual work focusing on wlw!! and this part of our identity as both people and creators is very important to us :) also I am here visiting them across the pond right now so it’s a very good day. To be gay. 👌✨🏳️🌈✨
i just started using watercolors, can you tell me about your process/share some tips?
Well first of all, congrats on trying watercolors! I’m by no means an expert yet but I’ll do my best to walk you through my process using some of the WIP pictures I have from previous pieces. There’s a ton to cover and I won’t get it all so feel free to ask more specific questions if you need help.
My first tip would be to play with whatever tools you have to figure out what feels right for you. If you don’t have any tools yet, I suggest the Sakura Koi Pocket Field Sketch Box (pictured below) since it’s really nice quality, comes with a water brush, and usually costs like $15-$25 depending on size/where you buy it. If that’s still outside of your price range, the first watercolors I ever did were with old crayola palettes and it worked out fine, it just took way more layers and time to get the color depth I wanted.
As for paper, I’m still looking for the perfect one but just make sure it’s watercolor paper (cold press means there’s a texture, hot press is smooth) or multimedia and not like, printer paper. As long as it’s relatively thick, it should be ok but might buckle when too much water is added.
Don’t worry too much about perfection when learning how to use your equipment. Make lines, blend colors, try making washes, etc. When I came back to watercolors, I mostly did a lot of meditative painting, where I doodled whatever felt right. Some of them even came out real cool looking??
When I sit down to do a more detailed piece or commission, I have a five-part process I pretty consistently use these days. It goes like this:
1) Traditional (or digital) sketch/concept phase. The below pic is from a pop-art commission concept where I really liked the flow of her hair.
2) Digital lineart (cleaning up/refining concept sketches)
3) Print the lineart and lightbox it to watercolor paper using either a hard graphite pencil (very light lines) or colored lead. I still lightbox with this ancient hunk of junk but you can even use a window or your computer screen (VERY CAREFULLY) to lightbox if you don’t have one.
Here’s what some of my pieces looks like after being transferred:
I think it’s important to note that you should keep a piece of scrap paper under your hand while working on the watercolor paper, since the oils in your skin can lead to areas where the paint won’t bind to the paper properly. I’ve had cases where I finished a background wash only to find an absolutely perfect thumbprint in the center of it.
4) Ink the lines. Make sure your pens are waterproof. If they’re not, I’ll talk about a way to get around that later so skip right to painting for now.
I used micron technical pens for the above piece. If you don’t know if you have waterproof pens, make a test chart like the one below. Mine involved copics, watercolor, and super heavy scrubbing to see how easily the pen came off when wet.
I’ve also “inked” after painting by using more concentrated lines of watercolor instead of actual ink. The below painting was too cute and pastel and I didn’t want to ruin it with black lines, so I used that technique here (along with some red pencil)
5) Paint! I’m not really consistent with this step but my main tip is: BE PATIENT! If you want flat blocks of color, wait until each wash is fully dry before moving on to one next to it. If you don’t, they’ll bleed into each other. This is also true when trying to create shadows with hard edges instead of soft blending. Not being patient enough is my #1 cause of “crap I have to start this over”.
(The weird coloration on the lines above is actually dried frisket I put over certain sections of the piece to protect them but it ended up being more of a hassle than anything else for this style of piece.)
So, what if you didn’t have waterproof pens? You can easily reverse steps 4&5 and paint first, wait for it to dry very well, and then ink (shown below).
The finished piece looked like this:
I hope this was helpful!
If you want to see any of my WIPs/ask me questions, you can find me on Twitter and Instagram.