i feel like puke

OTP Drabble Challenge!

Rules: Followers send a number to your ask, along with a pairing, and you write a drabble using that dialogue in your piece! Try to keep up! Expect a TON of requests!

  1. “The doctor said it’s normal” - “Well that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt.”
  2. “Baby, you’re not a bother.” - “I’m too needy, you don’t deserve it.”
  3. “Come with me to the other room.” - “We’re not going to talk about this now.”
  4. “Did you just hiss at me?” - “Are you judging me?”
  5. “Don’t yell at me like I’m a child!!” - “DON’T THROW SCISSORS!”
  6. “Here, take me blanket/jacket.” - “I told you, I’m not cold.” *shivering*
  7. “Did you hear that?” - “I’m telling you, I’m haunted.”
  8. “I just wanted an easy day with my boyfriend/girlfriend. Is that too much to ask?”
  9. “Why are you awake right now?”
  10. “Come over here and make me.”
  11. “I want my best friend back.” - “Kevin is over there.”
  12. “H-how long have you been standing there?” - “Long enough.”
  13. “You’re lying, you’re blushing.” - “Shut up, no I’m not!”
  14. “No, I’m not talking to you.”
  15. “No more!” - “Okay, fine, I won’t send you any more selfies.”
  16. “What do you have?” - “Pizza rolls and Cup O’ Noodles…that’s about it. Popcorn?”
  17. “The salad here is really good.” - “Do I look like a fucking rabbit?”
  18. “Open this.” - “Can you say please?”
  19. “I just came to say goodbye…” - “Bullshit, you just feel bad.”
  20. “You’re on level 176.” - “Can you judge me harder?”
  21. “Jinx, you owe me a coke.” - *can’t speak until they buy a soda*
  22. “Please don’t leave me.” - “I don’t want to go”
  23. “Babe, I’m sorry.” - “Suck my ass.”
  24. “Liar, liar, pants on fire!” - “Seriously, you’re worse than a kid.”
  25. “You can’t ride a bike?” - “Why are we whispering?”
  26. “Is it that time of the month?” - “You literally ask me that whenever I’m mad at you!”
  27. “We’re going downtown.” - “There’s a strip club downtown.”
  28. “You weren’t supposed to hear that.” - “Well, you shouldn’t be saying it then.”
  29. “It’s not mine, I swear.” - “How is it not fucking yours!”
  30. “Take it off.” - “Like a bandaid?”
  31. “I told you…” - “Yeah, yeah, yeah, quit nagging.”
  32. “Boo?” - “You’re my boo.”
  33. “Don’t you ever do that again! You scared the shit out of me!”
  34. “You broke what?!?” - “Don’t worry, I’m okay.”
  35. “Why’re you dressed like that?” - “Does that mean it looks good or should I change?”
  36. “Fine, just do what you have to do.” - “Can you stop being so freaking cute so I can concentrate?”
  37. “…then I picked up your coffee by mistake.” - “All I want is an apology.”
  38. “Well, this is awkward.” - “Don’t touch me.”
  39. “You can’t make me.” - “What are you? Five?”
  40. “You’re a blanket hog!” - “Leave me alone and stop being so selfish.”
  41. “It’s not fair that you’re hot and funny.” - “Look who’s talking…just kidding, your jokes suck.”
  42. “I hate you.” - “No, you don’t.”
  43. “Should I be worried?” - “Is the grass green?”
  44. “You’re kidding me?!” - “Shush, my mom never taught me.”
  45. “I’m your lock screen?!” - “You weren’t supposed to see that.”
  46. “Will you go with me?” - “As long as you hold my hand.”
  47. “Baby, I’m scared.” - “You don’t have to be; not as long as I’m here.”
  48. “Come inside, I’m sorry.” - “Not until you apologize.” - “I just said I’m freaking sorry.”
  49. “Your voice is sexy.” - “Your ass is sexy.”
  50. “If I asked, you’d say no.” - “You don’t know that.”
  51. “Seriously, the chimney?” - “The squirrel can’t win!”
  52. “32?” - “I’ll prove it!”
  53. “It’s just so little and adorable.” - “That’s what she said.”
  54. “You’re not mature enough to be a parent.” - “Try me.”
  55. “Take a chance.” - “Umm…let me think…no.”
  56. “Game’s over, you son of a bitch!!” - “Okay, just don’t hit me.”
  57. “You forgot about my birthday!” - “In my defense, I forget about a lot of things.”
  58. “You need more stamina.” - “No, I need more steak and eggs. So…get on it.”
  59. “Can you dance with me?” - “You’re not mad?”
  60. “I’ll smash it, I swear.” - “You smash it and we’re done.”
  61. “Move!” - “Why would I move if I’m so comfy where I am?”
  62. “I’m not going in.” - “Then we’re not going to get a treat after.”
  63. “I really would’ve liked it if you told me your parents were coming to town.” - “I really would’ve liked it if you put underwear on before coming into the kitchen.”
  64. “I found it in the recycling bin.” - “Well, you’re the one killing the environment, so who’s really in the wrong here?”
  65. “We bet, and you lost.” - “But tattoos are permanent.”
  66. “Can you quit being so sassy?” - “Can you quit being so controlling?”
  67. “Are you getting jealous?” - “You’re changing your outfit, now!”
  68. “What time is it there?” - “We’re in the same time-zone.”
  69. “Quit flirting.” - “I didn’t mean to-”
  70. “I just don’t know what happened.” - “You’re too good for them.”
  71. “You have a cute nose, don’t make me break it.”
  72. “Tell me what I can do to help.” - “Sing me to sleep.”
  73. “You still need your baby blanket?”
  74. “Did you black out?” - “I feel like I’m gonna puke.”
  75. “Let’s just bury the hatchet.” - “Fuck your hatchet.”
  76. “I bet it’s a boy.” - “I bet it’s a turtle.”
  77. “Spare change?” - “You can’t be responsible, you don’t get your wallet.”
  78. “Cuddle or leave.” - “So is that a no to supper?”
  79. “Are you high?” - “I’m just so fucking tired.”
  80. “Why did I marry you?” - “It took a lot of convincing.”
  81. “Who’s texting you?” - “Umm. nobody.”
  82. “You have two choices.” - “Neither of which I like…”
  83. “I want a dog.” - “I want a cat.”
  84. “Chinese food?” - “Do we even know what that’s made of?”
  85. “These sheets are stained.” - “That’s disgusting.”
  86. “You don’t know how to change a tire?” - “Give it a rest, would you?”
  87. “That’s my ex-boyfriend/girlfriend.” - “Well, kiss me so they see.”
  88. “We got lucky. You’re not gonna do that again, right?”
  89. “Hey, babe, look what I found.” - “GET THAT OUT OF THE HOUSE NOW!!!”
  90. “You’ve been replaced.” - “Alright, we’ll see how you feel when you need me to kill a spider in the shower.”
  91. “Are those slippers?” - “Is that you being mean? AGAIN?”
  92. “You forgot your book.” - “No, I lost my book!”
  93. “You’re weird.” - “Or you’re just basic.”
  94. “We need a vacation.” - “You read my mind too much, it scares me.”
  95. “Why’d you hug him? You love him?”
  96. “Sorry.” - “Good choice.”
  97. “Luck? Nope. Skills.” - “If it’s skill then do it again.”
  98. “Why can’t you just believe me?” - “Because you lied about it before.”
  99. “This bath is too damn hot.” - “This is why we can’t do cute things. You complain too much.”
  100. *Make up your own*

Visit @prompt-bank for more prompts!!

Tell me I'm lying about having cancer? Enjoy getting chemo vomit on your shoes.

This happened almost a year ago. At the time, I was taking a bus regularly to a hospital for chemotherapy, which left me extremely weak and nauseous. So, when possible, I sat in the handicapped section near the front of the bus. Occasionally people would ask me to move. It’s a bus to a hospital, so a lot of people need the disabled seats, and I am young and outwardly looked healthy, after my hair had started growing back. Of course, they’d understand when I explained that I needed the seat.

Enter Bitchy Lady: a smartly dressed woman in her 60s. She asks me for my seat, and I explain that I just had chemotherapy and I need the seat. She calls me lazy, calls me a liar, and tells me that I “don’t look sick”.

I am too exhausted and nauseous to deal with this bullshit. I’ve been trying to not throw up for the last half hour. “Fuck it,” I decide, and aim.

I puke all over her nice shoes. She screams and jumps back. I wish I’d said something witty right then but I was busy just puking.

She stood quitely, redfaced, at the other end of the bus, and left me alone after that.

In retrospect, I feel like an asshole for making the bus driver clean up my puke. I was too much of a wreck to help–I could barely stand up–though I did apologize to him. It was a spur of the moment decision and I didn’t really think that consequence through. But damn it was satisfying to puke all over that bitch.

2

Prompt 24: “I need tampons.”

The moment those three words escaped your lips all six boys stared at you, all with varying expressions on their faces.

“Tampons?” Sodapop asked quizzically. “Sweet heart, you don’t need any tampons, we have plenty of napkins in the pantry. Do you want me to go get you some?”  

“Napkins?” You grunted impatiently as you stared at your big brother. “And what do you suppose using napkins will achieve Sodapop?” 

“Uh…” He trailed off, looking at Steve for support, but he shook his head… there was no way he was getting involved in this one. He puts his hands up in surrender. “I suppose it’d stop the, y’know… flow?” 

“You can say blood. And no, it won’t stop the “flow”, there is a crime scene in my undies.” 

No one dared to say a word. Not even Darry who would usually scold you for saying something so vulgar. 

You honestly weren’t meaning to be so bitchy, honestly, you weren’t… you had just had enough. You were fed up. All you wanted was your mother. But instead, you had to go through all of this by yourself. Darry was absolutely clueless… the day you got your first period, you thought he was going to have a heart attack. He had looked like a deer caught in headlights. 

But the boys winced the moment you had made that comment. 

“We can go get you tampons” Soda said softly, making eye contact with all the boys. “All of us, we will all go together.”

“Hey, Y/N… I can steal you some chocolate…” Two-Bit grinned, reaching out punch your arm softly. “What’ya say?” 

“If I eat chocolate right now, I’m going to puke… to be honest, right now I really feel like I want to murder someone.” And boy was that the truth, your first victim would probably be Steve. “But I also really want soft pretzels.”

“We can get you those.” Johnny smiled at you, he looked a little worried to… you had been getting pains all day… excruciating pains. And he felt awful sorry for you. 

“Okay, let’s wrap this up.” Steve said, walking straight out the door… you could tell he was glad to leave…

As all 6 boys walked out the door you heard Dally mutter to Ponyboy “I say we just get it over with and we kill her.” 

Snap Decision

My very first fanfic! I’m terrified! But I’m also excited. It seems I have a ton of beginnings and middles to different fics started, but this is the first one I’ve actually completed. I can’t believe I finished one! This is completely unbeta’ed, so all the mistakes are mine. I’m not a writer by trade, so I’m sure there are plenty!

Thank you so much to @loveinpanem​ for hosting the New Author’s Month. This was exactly the push I needed to actually put something out there. I would greatly appreciate any feedback or constructive criticism. Also, as much fanfic as I read, I’m not sure what the etiquette is for posting a full story on tumblr, so you can read this in its entirety on AO3!


Her sister, Prim, had insisted she download the Snapchat app. So technically, it was her fault that she was in this predicament to begin with. Well, Madge had also put the idea in Katniss’s head, so she could shoulder some of the blame too.

Keep reading

Business and Pleasure - Part 13

Summary:  Bucky AU. After a major deal falls through, your father’s business almost falls apart. In a desperate attempt to save his livelihood, he seeks the help of his oldest friend, George Barnes, who happens to be the CEO of one of the most influential businesses in New York. He agrees, but on one condition. You have to marry his son.

Word Count: 1,413

Warnings: Swearing


Originally posted by naih-reedus


“Y/N Barnes?” the nurse’s voice, however kind it may have seemed to everyone else in the room, sent shivers down your spine. You weren’t ready for this. You didn’t want to be here. In fact, you could think of several places you’d rather be at the moment, but you tried to keep a neutral expression as you stood.

“Do you want me to come in with you? Or I can just wait out here. Whichever you’d prefer.” Steve asked, giving your hand a reassuring squeeze.

Nodding, you squeezed back tightly, “Please. I feel like I’m either going to puke. Or pass out. Maybe both. I don’t really know.”


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Random Starters [ send me one maybe? ]
  • "Do you believe in the tooth fairy?"
  • "I think I'm pregnant. And it's not yours."
  • "I feel like I'm going to puke."
  • "Are you seriously wearing that to the party tonight?"
  • "You need to change that attitude before we leave this house."
  • "I AM NOT CRAZY!"
  • "Stop staring at me like I grew a second head."
  • "Are you drunk or do you just act like that all the time?"
  • "I forgot where I parked my car."
  • "I'm not going to lie to you anymore. I do love you, but I..."
  • "It's only a slice of pie."
  • "I just want to be loved again. Is that so wrong?"
  • "The cat is looking at me funny."
  • "YOUR HOUSE IS ON FIRE!"
  • "I think you're the prettiest thing I've ever seen."
  • "Care to join me?"
  • "I would rather not eat dinner alone."
  • "Did you remember to lock the door?"
  • "How do you live with yourself everyday, doing what you do?"
  • "I don't feel pretty enough for him."
  • "You can do anything you set your mind to."
  • "People say ignorance is bliss, but... I just want to know the truth."
  • "People are stupid today."
  • "I'm in the hospital. Can you come?"
  • "You're act liking I'm in love with you or something."
  • "Go ahead and leave. I'm not going to stop you."
  • "I'm tired of fighting."
  • "I think you need help."
  • "Do whatever you believe in, and I'll support you."
  • "What is it like being you?"
Showing off

Lance x reader (Mrs. Tucker)

Word Count: 827

A/N: One, reader-insert is not my strong suit. I don’t know why I keep setting myself up for this. Two, there’s no smut. I know, shocker right? There’s some adult flirting because they are a married couple. Three, I went with the urban dictionary definition of a ‘rare person’ because Lance is no virgin (the other urban dictionary definition). And four, this is my contribution to @bucky-plums-barnes 8K writing challenge. Congratulations, Gen! My prompt was  11. “You finally match your unicorn status, sweetheart”

Originally posted by love-buckybarnes

Lance looked around the gymnasium. Families everywhere. The school’s annual carnival had a great turn out this year. People who didn’t even have kids in the school showed up to support the community.

“Lance!” He looked up at the sound of your voice. You waved from the doorway to an adjacent gym. “I need your help!”

“Coming, babe!” He handed off his roll of tickets to another volunteer and walked toward you. He smirked at the way you bit your lip, watching him come closer. “What’s up or did you just want to watch me walk across the gym?” He laughed loudly at the blush that crept of your cheeks.

“I need help setting up the paints for this year’s banner.” You turned away from him and over to where there were several paint pans on the floor and jugs of paint lined up.

He licked his lips as he watched you bend over. “Looks like you’ve got it covered, babe.”

You looked over your shoulder at him. He smirked and shrugged at being caught admiring your ass. “I asked you in to help, Tucker. Not to stare at my ass.”

Lance stepped up behind you and ran his hands down your thighs then back up over your ass. “But it’s such a nice ass.”

“Tuck. Anyone could walk in.”

He sighed and gave your right cheek a hard smack. “Fine.” He stepped away, adjusting himself in the track pants. A glance at his crotch rewarded you with a mouthwatering dick print on the blue fabric. “What am I doing?”

“I need you to open the rest of the paint cans and help me pour them into these trays. “ He started opening the paint cans one at a time and setting them by their respective trays. The both of you looked up at a pack of giggling from the doorway. You knew WHY they were giggling but you liked to give Lance a hard time. “Can we help you, girls?”

They whispered between themselves then elected one to be the voice and nudged her forward. “We were wondering, Mrs. Tucker if…if Mr. Tucker would do some flips for us?”

You crossed your arms over your chest and looked over your shoulder at him, grinning. “I don’t know. Mr. Tucker? How about showing these girls some of your moves?”

He pressed his lips together and shrugged. “Sure why not?” You moved over to group of girls. He unzipped his jacket and tossed it away. The girls giggled. You shook your head, still grinning. Fuck, he looked good in the white tee. You could see his little nipples poking against the shirt. It wasn’t often Lance got to show off for you. And he never missed the opportunity when it arose.

You watched him do a few quick stretches, admiring his perfect ass and thick thighs. He strutted to the far end of the gym. He usually performed on a matted surface or the soft ground underneath the grass. This polished, waxed hardwood was very different surface. He bounced back and forth on each foot then he ran forward. The girls gasped, including you as he flipped across the gym, lightning fast. He planted both feet then launched himself into the air, twisting his body around before he stuck the landing. In a tray of paint. Your gasp of shock was the loudest of the girls.

Lance had a moment of triumph then sticky liquid slid under his foot and he went down, taking out several colors of paint. “Lance!” You ran over, followed by the group of girls. He groaned and leaned up, looking down at himself. “Lance, baby, are you ok?” You dropped to your knees next to him, not caring around the spilled paint.

“I think I’m alright.” He seemed to find himself in good condition. He dropped his head back and stared up at the ceiling. “How’d it look?”

“Perfect.” He grinned. “Lance, are you really ok?”

“I’m fine. Bruised ass, maybe. Bruised pride, definitely. I feel like a rainbow puked on me.” He sat up and looked around at the mess, thankful you’d been smart enough to throw down a drop clothe. Your lips twitched. Now that you knew he was ok, you fought to keep from giggling. He noticed the lip twitch. “What?”

“You finally match you unicorn status, sweetheart.”

His jaw dropped. “You-“ He lunged for you. You evaded him only to step into one of the trays that had made it unscathed in his fall. With a surprised cry, your foot went out from under you and you fell right into Lance, knocking him back into the paint. “That’s what you get for picking on me.” He grinned, pushing your paint soaked hair from your face and smearing different colors over your cheek. You lay there in the paint for a moment, almost afraid to move for making more of a mess. “If I’m a unicorn, does this mean I get to point you with my horn?”

“Lance!”

Rocking Motion

My entry for this week’s @txf-prompt-box challenge! Tagging @today-in-fic and @fictober as well

Prompt: An emergency lifeboat ride

Bonus: Someone suffers from seasickness

Double bonus: Krycek, CSM or Jeffrey Spender makes a cameo

It’s fluff, you guys (everyone helping me decide earlier: thank you! Fluff eventually won out. You angsty people get a story tomorrow). Set in no particular season, but it feels seven-ish to me. 

They have been in all kinds of strange and life-threatening situations. Trapped in a small lifeboat with Mulder and a guy who Scully swears looks like Krycek’s twin in the middle of the ocean is a new one, though. With Mulder hanging off the side puking his guts out, Scully still hopes to wake up and encounter this is all just a silly nightmare. Any moment now, she pleads, as Mulder vomits again.

“You should have let me die in the water, Scully,” Mulder tells her, his voice raw, “That would have been kinder.” The Krycek twin chuckles and Scully narrows her eyes, throws him an angry look. No one but her is allowed to make fun of Mulder; especially not someone who could be their arch enemy’s doppelgänger. He quiets immediately.

“Mulder, you’ll be fine once we’re on land again. I promise. It could have been much worse.” They could, in fact, be dead. It borders on a miracle that they’re alive, healthy, or at least hanging in there in Mulder’s case, and safe. When their boat drove into a rock and tipped them over, they almost recreated the Titanic movie – at least that’s what Mulder told her, his teeth chattering. Except they didn’t even have a door Mulder would insist she lie on and her refusing to do so resulting a fight. There was nothing. Until suddenly the lifeboat sped past them, around them, picked them up and now here they are. For once Scully is not going to question it and just accept it as it is. As unlikely as the scenario is if she allows herself to think about it. But they’ll have to follow up on Mulder’s lead tomorrow. Or not, she thinks as she watches Mulder, his whole upper body hanging over the ship’s rail, his face pale and sweaty, being sick.

“How long until we reach mainland?” Scully asks Krycek’s twin; the name tag on his waterproof jacket says ‘Ron’.

“A while, miss.” Scully stares at him, her face disgusted; it’s not his fault that he looks like Alex Krycek, but it unnerves her. He tips his hat, smirks, and Scully shudders. She opens her mouth ready to ask him if he’s Krycek in disguise taking them somewhere to torture or kill them, but she stops herself just in time.

“Is there a quiet place I can take my partner?” She asks instead.

“Sure. Take him downstairs to my cabin. I’ll stay here.” His grin reveals two missing teeth. Lovely. His voice, she now realizes, sounds nothing like Krycek either. Krycek was missing a hand and this man has two of them. She eyes him anyway, looks him up and down, which he seems to misinterpret as flirting.

“Thank you.” Scully finally says deciding that if he wanted to kill them, he would have done so already. She walks up to Mulder, who looks even more miserable than he did five minutes ago.

“Scully, throw me back into the water please. I’d do it myself, but I don’t have any strength left.”

“Oh Mulder,” She sighs, gently patting his back, “come on. I’ll take care of you.”

“I feel like dying, Scully.” But he follows her on unsteady feet.

“You’re not going to die, Mulder. Not today. I’ll make sure of that.”

The cabin is cool, dark and has a small cot where Scully steers him to. He sits down and glances up at her, sad puppy eyes and all.

“Lie down, Mulder.”

“It’s gonna make it worse, Scully.”

“No, it’s not.” He remains stubborn and upright. Who is the medical doctor here, anyway? Scully gently, then less gently, pushes at his shoulders. He’s got no strength left and finally, albeit with a heavy sigh, lies down on the cot.

“It’s not better.”

“Mulder, give it more than a millisecond, will you? Keep your head as still as possible and close your eyes.”

“Don’t wanna close my eyes.”

“Then look at the ceiling. Find yourself a stable object you can look at.” He turns so that he’s on his side. His eyes are on hers, curious, unblinking. “Mulder?”

“If you don’t move, you’re a stable object.” He tells her.

“Scoot over.”

“My doctor said I should lie still.”

“Scoot over, Mulder.” He does as he’s told. The cot is big enough for the two of them. She hasn’t planned to lie down; one of them should keep an eye on the Krycek twin just in case. But Mulder’s eyes, the misery reflected there, are too compelling and make her forget everything else. Their bodies are not quite touching, but Mulder is radiating warmth, and Scully moves just the tiniest bit closer to him.

“Try to close your eyes, Mulder.”

“I’d rather look at you.” Scully wills herself not to blush, fails, and hopes that here in the dim light, Mulder can’t see it.

“Does it help?”

“Hmm.”

“You know your sea sickness is caused mostly by your inner ears.” She touches his ear, follows its unique shape.

“Tell me more.”

“Your inner ears control your balance and whenever there’s a conflict in what they sense and what your eyes see, you will get sick.”

“Why don’t you get sick? Why are your ears telling you different things than mine?”

“I don’t know, Mulder.” She chuckles.

“You don’t know? Dr. Dana Scully doesn’t know?”

“No, I don’t. How are you feeling? Any better?”

“I don’t feel like puking my guts out.”

“That’s improvement, isn’t it?”

“I guess.”

“Still rather be dead?”

“No. I feel like I’m in heaven, though.”

“Why’s that?”

“I get to unabashedly stare at you.” This time Scully blushes so furiously she’s certain Mulder can’t miss it.

“I’d kiss you right now, Mulder, if you didn’t smell like puke.”

“Keep that thought until we’re off this boat and somewhere I can get a toothbrush and toothpaste.”

“Hm, maybe I’ll do that.” She says and smiles.

anonymous asked:

one time i was on register and was having extremely painful menstrual cramps and felt like i had to puke. i could also feel that i was "leaking". i had no customers so i quickly turned off my light when a guy came up and asked where i was going. i said i was closed. he said "no you're not. you're ringing me up." i looked at him, and immediately walked away and basically ran into the bathroom. you're not my boss, fuck off.

Earth Lanterns as Things I've Said
  • Alan Scott: AH MY BACK MY BACK CURSE YOU YOUNGER YEARS OF BAD POSTURE...I'm still not going to sit straight though
  • Hal Jordan: They call just call me Shamrock, not the Lucky Shamrock for obvious reasons
  • Guy Gardner: OUT OF MY WAY JERKS, VERY IMPORTANT GINGER COMING THROUGH
  • Jon Stewart: You see this little chart I made here shows how much bullshit I tolerate, as you can see it's already gone past my predetermined measurements
  • Kyle Rayner: Man I love being creative, if only I could create
  • Jade: Fuck Milwaukee, fuck parents, I'm going to start a traveling band
  • Simon Baz: That hot rod though, a classic muscle car from the 60s; man I'm going to be spouting mechanical nonsense allll week
  • Jessica Cruz: Whoo I feel great, this is going fine, this going good, and whoops there goes the anxiety, I feel like I'm going to puke