i feel like i should tag u bc it's your fic so

nursey the tech disaster and dex the apple support guy: an au

a conversation between me & @brandnewfashion

(interspersed with random hockey commentary)

kayytx

au where nursey keeps having IT trouble and every time he goes online to use that quick chat help service (bc he doesn’t want to call. that’s awkward af) he gets dex as the service guy

brandnewfashion

oooooh

nice!!!!!!!!!!!!

TELL ME MOER

Keep reading

~ still not gay ~

Word Count: 2 800

Genre: chat fic, coming out, coming to terms with sexuality, humour

Pairing(s): phan, tiny mention of kickthestickz

Warnings: swearing, so many spelling/grammar mistakes (all on purpose as it’s a chat fic), mentioned homophobia, sexual humour (not a lot)

Summary:

crabstickzzz has added PJ to the chat.
PJ: what?
dannyboy: chris and co. think im gay

A/N Shout out to the (formerly) ~ still not gay ~ chat, thanks for not believing I was straight. (Loosely based off my own unconventional coming out.)

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

hi I like your writing but you really should my call lance "McClain" in your fics. Lance is canon Cuban in VLD, it isn't a Cuban last name and was only his last name in go lion, when he was white. Using it is kinda whitewash-y. Maybe next time use a Cuban name! Have a good day!

thanks! 

now, you want me to stop using ‘McClain’ as lance’s last name because it’s not “cuban”, right? 

ok. i get where you’re coming from and i understand. “McClain” has a history linking back to scotland and the like, so i get why you’d say it’s “whitewash-y”. however, that being said, i don’t think it’s white-washing to use that as his last name.

i’m going to state here: i’m not cuban. i’m white. i’m not going to preach on behalf of poc - cubans in particular, i’m just going to give my opinion. feel free to message me again if you want to discuss this (or if i say smth bad). 

k, now bc i’m white, all i’m going to say is: i don’t think you should be claiming that lance’s last name can’t be mcclain purely because it does have scottish links. lance’s family, (as seen below), aren’t all poc. in fact, some of them are white, i would say.

what does this mean? lance could be biracial. in fact, i headcanon him as such. is that a problem? literally no. having biracial representation is really cool too! 

so it wouldn’t be much of a stretch for his last name to be mcclain if his dad is white and his mother is cuban.

REGARDLESS, labelling names as black/white/asian/etc isn’t … the best thing to do, i don’t think. i’m not sure how to word this exactly but: names don’t define ethnicity / race. 

in short: i’m going to keep using McClain as Lance’s last name until we get a different one, if that happens. i’m sorry if this offends you or upsets you.

oiks-v  asked:

OH MY GOD IVE BEEN STALKING YOUR BLOG FOR THE LAST HOUR NOW AND IM C R Y I N G YOUR ART IS AMAZING AND THE SOUKOKU HELP (pssst just wanna ask if you know any good bsd fics? and... *inches closer* ive looked at a few asks that speak about a "shitty anon" and "angst" please help me find it senpai i welcome all angst bc trash is my middle name)

MMMMM FIC RECS HELL YEAH I DO HAVE A LOT OF FICS TO REC LET’S DO THIS

- Find something worth dying for (And learn how to live). This fic. This fucking fic made me cry everytime it was updated. It’s the most well written slow burn skk fic I’ve ever had the honor to read and tbfh I would draw an entire manga for it if I had enough time. 

- Anything by setosdarkness tbh. Her plots are so original her writing is superb and basically everything she writes makes me cry tears of blood. But like everyone here knows I’m gay for her writing so??? Yeah. 

- Anything by owlsareheadturners tbh. They write the hottest R18 not gonna lie and their writing is like one of the prettiest and their angst are top notch AND THEY WROTE DACHUUTACHI HOW’S THAT I LOVE THEM.

- i won’t lie (i knew you belong here). Please update. Why won’t you update. I would die for your update. It’s very sweet and fluffy and lovely and all the feels I love it so much but why won’t it update.

- Partners in love. It’s like a series of one-shots and it’s very cute and fluffy and funny it soothes my soul. Think domestic Soukoku. Then cry. 

- All in a night’s work. Mmmmmmm courtesan Chuuya. Like do I even need to say more it’s courtesan Chuuya and it’s R18 it speaks for itself tbh. Tho do check out the author’s profile too she has many good fics that one just needs special mention. 

- Footsteps on the ceiling. Or that one fic where Chuuya is so incredibly cute that Dazai needs to reevaluate his entire life yeah damn right you should you waste of bandage. 

- What’s your flavour? MMMMMM I’M DACHUUTACHI TRASH SO HERE’S ANOTHER DACHUUTACHI FIC I LOVE IT THE ENDING IS SUPER HILLARIOUS AND THE R18 BITS ARE A++.

- Now, turn away. Please update???? WHY IS IT NOT UPDATING I NEED TO KNOW WHAT’S GONNA HAPPEN HOLY SHIT PLEASE??? Coughs totally not thirsty for the makeup sex yeah no I have pure motives.

- Baby, you feel like home. It’s so cute. I cried. Dazai is protective of Chuuya and I live for it.

- Playing the long game. Where Dazai is a little shit as usual but he at least he proposed in sort of a right way.

 - After the war (we were free). URGH. URRRRRRRGHHHHHH. THIS FIC GAVE ME WAY TOO MANY FLUFFY FEELS  I HAD TO PUNCH A WALL TO FEEL NORMAL AGAIN. LIKE. URGH. URRRRRGHHHHH. 

corporalmaladict  asked:

omg i just read patchwork justice and it was amazing. do you have any other les mis fic recs in particular? i've read a lot of the like widely known (whatever that means in the valvert fandom) ones like cinaed's stuff and three days but if you have any other small faves to share that'd be cool

oh man i’ve read every fic in the ao3 tag, but yeah okay let’s do a small rec of fics that pop into my head as i type

  • One Man and His Van by tcwordsmith PLEASE READ THIS ONE!! It’s a small one-shot super sweet modern au in which Valjean is a v charismatic man with a van and Javert is moving. Fave.
  • look at the stars, it’s written there by carnival_papers oh my good i love this so much, and i really don’t like Valvert in Dallas Les Mis? Anyway this is fantastic
  • Two By Two by Ark this is both Valvert and E/R but both are equally important. It’s basically Enjolras running into Valjean and Javert doing the thing against a wall on the barricade and then feeling inspired enough to find and confess to Grantaire. its rly good!!
  • this is my nightstick and i am the law by caylar have i ever mentioned i love really cracky modern premises that make for extremely awkward situations involving, oh i don’t know, mistaking someone for a stripper? because i do. and if u do too, this is perfect.
  • The Curves of Your Lips Rewrite History by zamwessel  you’ve all probably read this bcs its pretty fandom famous but i don’t care because it’s one of the best things i’ve ever read and honestly it’s the best characterisation for them and it makes me cry and laugh every time. that being said it’s 90 percent smut. 
  • Kneeling on the Heights of Virtue by Carmarthen and if you also like me really love post seine UST and biblical references, well. Read this.
  • Equuleus by visiblemarket aka weird horse girl Javert feat. Madeleine
  • The Ignoble Act of Surrender by stonecarapace I should warn on this one, it’s dubious consent since it’s during the Madeleine Era, which i normally don’t like a lot. really wonderful javert here.
  • breaking in, shaping up by brodinsons nothing can explain why i love this fic so much except the summary itself: “Javert explains the mechanics of horseback riding to Valjean while riding Valjean’s dick.”
  • Flowers of Autumn Days by madame_le_maire post seine sweet gardening bonding?? more like marry me twice author.
  • People in Masks series by ConstanceComment such wonderful characterisation here, and a fix it, too, honestly what more could you want.

these are just a few from the top of my head, oh man i have so many faves. but these are super cool so check them out!

malec fic recs

i said i’d have this up by saturday but u should know by now to never listen to a thing i sa y anyway here u go nerds


Rush by heartsdesire456 words: 9453, chapters: 1/1

Summary: After Camille opens a door Magnus never wanted to open to Alec, Magnus and Alec, who are still working out exactly what is going on, are forced to talk about some very heavy subjects.

this is literally the fluffiest thing ever oh my god it’s very domestic at the end and i love that. Also, since it was originally supposed to be simon/raphael, there’s a bit of that if you squint.


Defying Gravity by ketz words: 4800, chapters: 1/?

Summary: When Izzy and Aline suggested that Alec should join the coming Wicked cast, the idea sounded not only ridiculous, but completely absurd. All the law student wanted was a peaceful and anonymous life, free of over exposure.

But maybe, just maybe, it was time to let go of his self-set restrains. Specially if it means getting to know the intriguing Art Director of the play, right?

The first chapter sets everything up, and i’m really curious to see where the author goes with this because alec is v well written. Also there’s side aline/helen yay.


The Angel in Blue by hobbit69 words: 32949, chapters: 9/?, explicit

Summary: Homicide detective, Alec Lightwood has seen and heard it all in his eight years with the NYPD. but he never expected billionaire playboy, Magnus Bane. Magnus is a suspect in a string of prostitute homicides and Alec must walk a fine line between procedure and the overwhelming desire he feels for his prime suspect.

There are so many plot twists i’m yelling i love detective au. Also, alec and magnus have sex like every chapter in the later ones, so if you don’t like that, none of it’s plot relevant so you can just skip it. It gets v fluffy at the end, and there’s a p tiny bit of angst in the middle.


Internet Famous by kuro1neko2kun words: 9378, chapters: 12/?

Summary: Alec and Magnus are both Youtubers. They meet for the first time at Vidcon, doing a video together. The viewers (and Izzy) think they’d be a cute couple, and they awkwardly fulfill everyone’s dreams. Sort of.

I’m a p bad judge of content when it comes to youtuber au bc it’s honestly my fave, but anyway this is v cute. Alec and Magnus have mutual crushes on each other and stuff wow.


amor verus by budapestagain words: 1681, chapters: 1/?

Summary: To Alec Lightwood, family is the most important thing, above everything, including personal happiness. So when he proposed to Lydia, he wasn’t thinking of himself but the family name. Magnus Bane is a popular and successful wedding planner and when he’s hired to plan Alec’s wedding, he thinks this will just be another job.

They have to find out that sometimes the right thing to do is to follow your heart.

An au of the malec episode, with alec marrying lydia to preserve the lightwood family name or some other asinine reason. It has the usual canon side pairings


better angels by redvelvetrose1742 words: 8241, chapters: 5/?

Summary: When there’s only one active Shadowhunter in the whole crazy mess that is New York City, it’s bad.

When that one Shadowhunter is living with three adults who are cursed to never leave the Institute’s grounds, two of which hate each other, it’s very bad.

When that Shadowhunter’s happiness and even mental stability is sacrificed in the pursuit of perfection, it’s monstrous.

When that one, fourteen year old Shadowhunter is found crying in an alley by the High Warlock of Brooklyn, it’s a matter of life and death.

this is an au where maryse and robert lightwood were sentenced to never leave the institute. also, alec is their only son which means no isabelle and max but it also means that alec meets magnus earlier in his life. pls look through the tags there are a bunch of possible triggers in this.


all precious things by crownedcarl words: 12556, chapters: 2/?, explicit

Summary: Magnus has expensive taste; Alec is the prettiest face on the block.

this is basically a hooker au except magnus is still a warlock, the world of shadowhunters still exists, but our main characters are mundanes. The dub con tag is because of the whole memory alteration thing that magnus does. v well written !


Attraction by ThePenguinOfDeath words: 1650, chapters: 1/1

Summary: “I’m looking for a book.” The man smiled, his eyes turning up at the edges. Everything about him was confident – Alec was almost envious.

“Well this is the library, so you’ve come to the right place.”

i cant believe im reading librarian au,,, what has my life come to. or in which magnus is looking for a book and alec is more than happy to help.


for you are my fate by grandeur words: 1898, chapters: 1/1

Summary: Alec pretends not to notice him. Maybe this is one of those times where Magnus will take a hint and won’t grab him to go do something absolutely ridiculous. Like that time Magnus woke him up at two in the morning because he had the urge to redecorate, and oh, Alexander, darling, how do you feel about custard yellow curtains? Which. Alec didn’t even know custard yellow was a color, nonetheless that it came on curtains.

very very incredibly fluffy aaaa magnus paints alec’s nails


fake date me, alexander by mininoot words: 6119, chapters: 2/?

Summary: “Aleeec, please be my fake boyfriend?”

“No!”

“So you’ll do it?”

“I never said that.”

“But you were thinking it!”

Malec fake relationship AU. Pre-established friendship.

i love this so much. its hilarious. also the best line to sum this fic up is: “You took Grinding-101 at the age of six?”. + side simon/raphael


avarice by spun words: 36214, chapters: 4/4

Summary: “Magnus had said warlocks were avaricious, possessive beings. Well, Alec wasn’t a warlock, but he’d be damned if he let anyone touch the best thing that had ever happened to him.” The one where warlocks are being murdered, Magnus is a target, and Alec really isn’t supposed to be getting involved (but does anyway).

this may actually be my favorite malec fic ever. the writing is beautiful and the plot is amazing. also pls read everything by this author all the malec they write is absolute gold but i can’t put everything on this list.


i might make a part two later

anonymous asked:

Do u have any ideas/meta/headcanons about wandless magic? bc I've seen some headcanons floating around which were basically saying wands were a European thing & that loads of wixen in other places (the headcanons I read centered around the Native Ameicans I think) just used wandless magic but then when the white settlers came they banned it bc they thought it was dark. Or something? I was wondering about your opinion on that idea & just wandless magic in general bc I think it's rly cool. Thx! :)

So I looked through my tags for stuff on this and there’s a lot of stuff, so for starters I’d advise going through my meta tag and my tags on alternate forms of magic/alternative forms of magic and the Shafiq family, possibly also the fics from independence/resistance week. That should give you an idea of what I’ve already written on the subject.

A few key posts you should definitely read:

Wand magic & other forms of magic, even within the Western context

Wand magic & non-western cultures

This submit by essayofthoughts and my reply

Magic as electricity & wands as punishment

This fic on departmentsofmysteries

This myth on how wands came to be popular submitted by essayofthoughts

These posts on encyclopaediaarcana  [x, x, x]

_____________________________________________________

Basically, I think that wandless magic was the way magic was originally practiced all over the world. Wands serve as conductors for magic, so if your magic is not very strong or if your control over magic isn’t very good, then you use a wand to channel your magic and produce the effects you want it to - essentially, wands started out being used either where magic had to be used in incredibly precise or tiny amounts (so to filter out interfering amounts of magic) or to help people who were not very good at magic. In some cases, in Roman Europe, especially, wands came to be used as a way of punishing powerful wix who stepped outside the bounds of the community which is an idea that the ficlet on departmentsofmysteries looks at. Eventually they take precedence over wandless magic because wandless magic is extremely difficult to perform - it requires a great deal of concentration and will power, whereas wand magic is essentially magic lite, you don’t need to put much effort into it to get it right - and wand magic is easier, saves time etc etc. I also think it ties into the fact that wand magic would have made sense in a militaristic setting, for fighting on the battlefield - ritual magic can only take you so far and there’s only so much concentration you can dedicate to channeling your will into creating the kind of magical effects you want WHILE fighting - so I believe that yes, wands would have become popular during the time of the Roman empire and its imperial/expansion project.

Whether or not wands are purely a Western concept or not, is something that I have mixed feelings about. If we’re drawing purely on historical/archaeological records, there are mentions of things like staves/staffs/wands being used as props during magic - or even other non-standard props being used to facilitate magic e.g. the use of a distaff (for spinning wool) in Seidr. Like I said, if we think about wands as conductors of magic, it would make sense for wix all over the world to have had them in some form or the other, particularly where magic would have had to be applied in controlled or restricted measures in order for rituals etc to work properly. By saying that wands are purely a Western concept, I think it does a great disservice to non-Western countries where wands or things like wands could have been used to perform magic in very particular settings, but maybe not as widespread practice.

I’m not saying that every non-Western culture has wands. Some do, some don’t, some have things that look like wands and some have things that don’t quite look like wands but yet are very much part of the process of doing magic. It’s just not very ‘recognizable’ to settlers, which, I think, is where the real problem stems from.

Wandless magic however is a little more complex, I think. Of course, it exists in various forms across cultures, but in the areas strongly influenced by the Greco-Latin magic system (i.e. HPverse magic) - and by that extension the Roman expansion project - wands would have eventually gained precedence over other forms of magic. I’ve looked at the kind of prejudice that would have been there in the early 9th and 10th centuries regarding the use of wands in this fic on the Ollivander family. Also iirc, being able to perform wandless magic in HP canon is considered a mark of a great/skilled wizard - I’ve managed to count only four book-canon wizards who are mentioned doing wandless magic (Dumbledore, Voldemort, Snape & Lupin) and if you increase this to film canon you have Hermione as well. So there’s still a kind of reverence for wandless magic, but essentially the Greco-Latin magic system view is that fwiw, wand magic is much more practical for the substance of day to day living and for all wix to perform.

In the colonial context, wands take on a kind of symbolic meaning, if that makes sense? It’s a way for the colonizers to “distinguish” themselves from the colonized and to reassert their own superiority and by that extension, to impose that superiority on other people - irrespective of their own views on wandless magic in their own native culture. The wand stands in for them and for their culture and for their magic, specifically, and so must be protected at all costs - and imposed on everyone else as part of the ‘civilizing’ project, i.e. to make others just like them. Does that make sense?

Whether or not wandless magic is dark - this is actually interesting because a lot of the dark magic that I’ve created for this ‘verse is largely non-wand magic/ritual magic. Arguably this might be because I am more fascinated with exploring the realms of dark magic and what it could be used for than I am for looking at light magic, but I think possibly what you could also infer is that really powerful dark magic is almost always wandless/ritual based simply because it requires that much concentration and willpower and sheer energy to be poured into it in order for it to be successful. Most of the really powerful magic we see in HP canon (barring the Patronus charm) - and also don’t necessarily seem to follow the standard formula of say the spell and the thing happens, e.g. the Cruciatus, or are wilder/less controllable e.g. Fiendfyre - is, incidentally, dark magic. Combine that with the ‘civilizing’ project of wixen colonialism and it could explain why wixen colonizers wrote off all non-Western wandless magic as dark. There’s also the possibility of it being a purely pragmatic decision couched in moralistic terms to lend apparent weight to it: wandless magic and ritual magic are far more powerful and far more difficult to combat/work against - moreso when it is unfamiliar magic - and so in order to create a rule-able people, making wandless magic a question of light and dark (rather than one cultural form of magic against another) they create a case for banning this magic that is virtually unassailable. Because everyone wants to be a ‘good’ wix, not a ‘dark’ wix.

I have a lot more thoughts on wand magic and its links with the kind of socioeconomic/cultural systems that developed in “the West” but I don’t think they’re particularly relevant to what you’re asking.

(All of this theory of magic, ofc, is predicated on the idea of magic being a form of energy - I am overwhelmingly fond of flourishandblottsstories’ piece on magic being the result of excess electrical energy in the nervous system.)

June 21st-June 26th. i read a lot of fics this week. downright drowned in the ‘derek is a failwolf’ tag. Super embarrassingly stupid omg no bb stop bc s5 is coming up and I can’t imagine a TW without the hot mess that is Derek Hale <333 

If you haven’t read this yet, wear diapers so you don’t piss yourself laughing: 

Bogarted by HalfFizzbin (1/1 | 3,126 | Mature)

Alternate Title: “Dick Failwolf, Private Eye.”

(Or, Derek’s hit with a Film Noir curse, which forces him to narrate his own life in luridly-detailed prose.)

No one should be this socially awkward. Ever. No one: 

A Crumpled Bouquet of Pink Flowers by Vendelin (1/1 | 2,418 | Teen) 

Derek passive-aggressively courts Stiles

Stiles-1 Derek-0. omg! Just read the tags!  the tags are fucking glorious!: 

Highway Unicorn by Nanoochka (1/1 | 5, 245 | Explicit)

Stiles is awesome at giving road head. Presumably, he’s good at getting it as well. Derek? Not so much.

Just kdf;bm; ROTFLMAO: 

The Real Reason Derek Doesn’t Use Stairs by Hatteress (1/1 | 229 | Teen) 

“I’m a werewolf,” Derek says, like that’s a freaking excuse.

Derek listens to Erica and FAILS: 

Slightly Damaged, Still Good by Trelkez (1/1 | 1,564 | Teen)

“You gave me your sat-on half-dead flowers,” Stiles said, waving them at Derek’s back. “Are you going to ask me out, or what?”

This is more of a pack fail than a Derek fail. They’re all pretty inept tbh:

making an ass out of u and me by verity (1/1 | 1,358 | Explicit)

It’s hard to blame Derek for the fact that everything he says sounds insulting. The guy was raised by wolves.

Stiles-2 Derek-0: 

Ice Cream is Overrated by kototyph (1/1 | 2,344 | Teen)

Stiles is hopelessly competitive. Derek is just hopeless.

Love this series! Loveeee!: 

To See Heaven in a Wild Flower by ChildOfTheRevolution (1/1 | 2,943 | Gen.)

Working in a florist on Valentine’s Day was like working in a gun shop during the zombie apocalypse. Very loud, very busy and the very real threat of death especially for anyone who worked at said florist when they were desperately running out of red roses.

AKA the one where Stiles is working Valentines day in a stupidly named florist and may or may not fall for a totally adorable, incredibly gorgeous, emotionally stunted, slightly damaged Alpha Architect named Derek Hale. Also Laura’s a BAMF.

If you like a little failure with a little A/B/O and angst meep meep:  

Derek The Domestic Failwolf by standinginanicedress (1/1 | 9,937 | Explicit)

Stiles got training to be an omega, and Derek got training to be an alpha. Hard edges, tough, sneering at the sheer thought of fucking knitting something while he beat people up for fun. That’s how his parents raised him.

And, yeah. That’s all good for protecting Stiles and buying things for him, the stuff he’s supposed to do.

But sometimes he wants to be good at the other stuff. Stiles likes the other stuff – he deserves the other stuff.

or 5+ times that Derek (thinks he) was a shitty alpha.

long drawn out slow-building assemblage of failures i.e total shit show:

Stapp’s Ironical Paradox by SwimmingSwans (1/1 | 39,240 | Mature)

“The universal aptitude for ineptitude makes any human accomplishment an incredible miracle.” In which Stiles believes the same applies to werewolves and other nonhuman entities. Not 3b compliant.

Fails that hurt!!!! Owwwwwww:

How I Long For Yesterday by sweetbutterbliss (1/1| 6,017 | Mature)

Stiles blinks, his throat going dry, and he moves his thumb without thinking - liking the post. He feels a surge of petty satisfaction. At least the fucker will know he knows now. He stands up, his body feeling too heavy, and he blows out the already guttering candles. He lets out a sob of frustration when the last one won’t fucking blow out. But he sucks it back in and bites down on his tongue, using his thumb and forefinger instead.

He throws himself into their empty bed without undressing. He lies there repeating the words ‘Derek blew me off for Isaac’ over and over. He tells himself to shut up while rearranging his pillow violently, but he goes to sleep with the refrain continuing its painful loop.

Caution: Derek is a massive idiot and holy fucking FAIL:

Derek Hale’s Terrible Guide to Returning Your Love for Someone by Shake_n_Blake (1/1 | 5,161 | Gen.)

In which Derek courts Stiles, forgetting that he’s not a wolf, and not impressed with Derek’s methods of wooing.

Derek can’t find a balance between his instincts and socially okay things. For example, leaving dead things at the person you’re trying to love’s house? Not socially acceptable.

Glorioussss: 

good, giving, and game by verity (1/1 | 89 | Explicit)

They’ve been together long enough now that they don’t have arguments over the big stuff anymore: there’s a few things they’ve each accepted as fact. Derek hates Olive Garden. Stiles refuses to let Derek work on the Jeep. Derek doesn’t dance. They’re never going to get werewolf-married because Stiles is never going to do the thing where Derek locks his werewolf dick in Stiles’s ass and jizzes all up his colon while they lie on a bed of rose petals and listen to mood music.

Derek should’ve invested in a bottle of nair: 

The Taller the Tree by DeCaStDe (1/1 | 5,091 | Explicit)

Derek misunderstands something Stiles says in bed, and does something about it. It goes spectacularly wrong, and Stiles happily reminds Derek that he loves him whatever ridiculous things he does.

Isn’t the title synopsis enough?: 

Derek Hale’s Seduction Technique by omlet (1/1 | 6,613 | Teen)

It doesn’t sit well with Stiles, the thing at the police station and with Erica. It niggles at him from the back of his mind, screaming PAY ATTENTION TO ME. Because Derek’s apparently familiar enough with flirting to do it successfully, like it’s something that comes naturally to him, but what kind of broody misanthropic guy flirts?

Stiles-3 Derek-0

Must Be This Tall To Ride by alchemy (1/1 | 3,760 | Explicit) 

“I love Ferris wheels, you’re afraid of heights. I’m happy, you face your irrational fear. It’s a win-win.”

Read this one forever ago and diedddd:

I Think the Problem Here is There’s Nothing Wrong by wait_for_it (1/1 | 5,156 | Teen) 

“Stiles wasn’t really sure what was going on, but if he had to guess, he’d say Derek Hale was losing his touch. The amount of times he’d been called out with the guy, presumably to stake out some new supernatural baddie only to have it be a false alarm, was starting to inch into the double digits.”

In which Stiles and Derek are dating and everyone knows it. Except Stiles.

Dorks! Just socially inept dorks!: 

A Little Less Sixteen Candles by silverlining99 (1/1 | 7,569 | Mature) 

In which Derek fails at wooing, and Stiles fails at catching a clue.

Also read this series forever and dieddddddd. Fucking adorable: 

Is It Cool if I Hold Your Hand by HalfFizzbin (1/1 | 1,343 | Gen.)

“So,” says Sheriff Stilinski, raising one eyebrow. “You decided not to play video games at Scott’s, after all?”

“Uh,” Stiles says. His eyes are wide and caught-out, and he’s got his arms wrapped around two giant tubs of popcorn. Beside him, Derek Hale—the same Derek Hale that the Sheriff last saw in his interrogation room—is handing a $20 bill to the cashier and clearly trying to appear as casual as possible. He fumbles the change three times before he gets it into his pocket, though, so it’s a lost cause.

Nooooo, Derek. Just nooooooo: 

By The Hour by janonny (1/1 | 16,490 | Not Rated) 

The one where Stiles thought Derek was a hooker who needed feeding, and Derek thought Stiles was interested in him.

BAHAHAHA: 

Brutalist Masterpieces by Febricant (1/1 | 1,577 | Gen.) 

It figures the day Derek finally decides to face the do-it-yourself furniture is the day he breaks the only necessary tool.

Derek listens to Isaac and FAILS. Wow, Derek should stop listening to people:

Spurred by ohlittle-red (1/1 | 2,225 | Teen)

Derek tries to be more obvious about his feelings. Stiles does not react according to plan.

And the grand fucking failing finale (i mean c’mon, just look at the title):

Badly Timed Boners and A Failure to Communicate by eeyore990 (8/8 | 22,806 | Explicit) 

Suddenly, Derek is everywhere, and not just in that creepy, Edward Cullen, I’m-gonna-stalk-around-and-lurk-broodingly way. Stiles doesn’t know what’s up with that, but he’s pretty sure there’s only one conclusion to be reached.

We’re all going to fucking die.

guess who just hit 5k and is highkey unworthy of that number! this bitch!

i honestly can’t explain how happy this makes me. i started this blog in may of 2015 and though im not the most popular blog, i’ve made so many wonderful friends and have really gotten to express myself through my (smutty) writing. the writing community on this site is so kind and supportive, and it’s so nice to have people here that won’t judge me and are equally as thirsty as i am :) i’m just gonna leave it at that because i know that nobody actually reads this part lol. thank you again, and onto the main event (below the cut because it’s kinda long whoops)!!

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one of the best things abt this otherwise not awesome year was writing fic and making friends on tumblr, so i’m hitting two birds with one stone and combining my follow forever with the fic rec post that most of the ppl i follow are on. (also i waited too long to do this bc i couldn’t figure out how to make a banner, sorry)

to start with, here’s the fic squad™, fic-writing peeps who are lovely and inspiring and as often as not, a little bit inappropriate:

@niallohmighty @nialljustgotwet @botticellistyles @fromward @drownedindeniall @slightlytotheleft, @littlervoice @singledadniall, @foxesmouth, @parrotiny, @1dgi @julianbrulian @heauxnarry @chilliad @girouxsmissingtooth @thejandshirt

and the mutuals who make tumblr fun:

@nuthinbutniall @narryssh @larrysinlove @jortsfan @niallthegun @herstrionics @2012niall @narrytitty @narrylime @follederire @harryqhs @narry-kisspersx @temponarry-fix @niall2 @corgisniall @narrycissist @horanxheart @smittennarry @narrywaffles @johngreenisnotanoctupus

and the master fic rec post i’ve been meaning to make forever, in no particular order:

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frothyisyourfriend  asked:

I'M KIDDING I LOVE YOUR TAGS PLEASE CARRY ON I JUST SAW YOUR TAGS ON THIS POST () AND I'M T O R N LIKE WHY DID YOU HAVE TO PUT DAD!JASPAR IN MY HEAD I'M SO SAD

(x) ASDFGHJKL FROTHY I LOVE U AND I ALSO LOVE DAD!JASPAR I ACTUALLY HAVE QUITE A FEW HEADCANONS ABT IT LIKE:

  • for some reason i always imagine them having two kids, boy and a girl and all their friends are like ‘oh here we go. jaspar can barely take care of a dog, no, a pet fish, and theyve got two kids…this wont end well’ 
  • zoe talks to joe one day and is like ‘yknow im here whenever you need me, but im not gonna raise these kids joe. u and caspar are really gonna have to be responsible. no more partying all the time and if u even think abt making josh the godfather i will kill u…” 
  • and joes basically like ‘zoe pls i can do this’ and hes so determined to prove everyone wrong bc he really wants these kids, they both do, and they plan to love and cherish them and raise them right 
  • “and theres no way josh is becoming the godfather are u kidding, zoe, im not an idiot”
  • caspar insists on making josh the godfather. joe stares at an imaginary camera like he’s on the office
  • they love the kids so much its crazy, they become such a close knit family unit and the kids are maybe a little spoiled (joe discovers that caspar has even less impulse control than he thought, as caspar will happily buy the kids whatever they want. “you need to teach them to work for some things caspar” joe says one day while theyre all out shopping. caspar and the kids turn to joe and simultaneously give him sad puppy dog eyes. joe grumbles under his breath but relents, buying them what they want.“ive taught them well” caspar says, ruffling their sons hair) 
  • they definitely raise the nerdiest children pls. the kids grow up on video games, harry potter, lotr and documentaries on ancient civilisations. and theyre little book worms!!! just imagine them all tucked up in joe and caspar’s bed, joe and casp each have a kid curled up next to them as they read them stories. theyd do funny voices for each of the characters and act out certain scenes and giggle a lot
  • theyd be a family of movie references and bad puns. points if the bad pun is a movie reference (theyd probs make it a game and actually keep score of the points and everything)
  • pranks. lots of pranks. joe sets up pranks on caspar with the kids all the time, theyre like his little sidekicks. but then they become too good and start working together to prank joe and he slowly begins to regret ever showing them his pranking ways (though he’s also proud af) also they all prank oli whenever he comes over #letolilive2kforever
  • theyre both the chill and fun parent. they form such strong bonds with their kids, so the kids are never shy coming to them for advice or talking to them about their troubles. they support their kids in everything, all their interests, letting them pick up any sport they want and pursue all their hobbies etc. (one week its painting, the next its cooking, then its making videos (they all film funny little skits together)) 
  • zoe comes over to spend some time with them (she hardly ever does bc they live far away. also jaspar would probably take the kids travelling in the holidays a lot so the kids are v worldly) and she pulls joe aside and smiles. ‘i should never have worried,’ she says. ‘theyre such lovely kids. you’ve done well joseph’ 
  • ‘told you’ joe replies smugly, feeling insanely proud of his kids
  • zoe pats his hair affectionately then grips his shoulder and pulls him to eye level 
  • ‘but i cant believe u actually let josh be the freaking godfather.’ 
Fic: Soccercrop (Chapter 12)

PrologueChapter 1Chapter 2Chapter 3Chapter 4Chapter 5Chapter 6Chapter 7Chapter 8Chapter 9Chapter 10, Chapter 11

Pairing: Soccer cop
Rating: T
Word count: 1055
Summary: dont even read the summary it wont tell u anything

Beth had left a little bit before six o’clock to go home and have dinner with her parents. “You should eat with us sometime this week,” she had said before she left, and you had agreed.

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anonymous asked:

Hi! This is random but I just started reading the 100 fics and was wondering if you had any recommendations? I'm having a hard time finding good ones. Thanks!

anon 2: some good bellarke fics youve read recently?
anon 3: Omg what fanfic have you been reading???

okay so for starters, first anon i can tell you there are sOOOOOOOOO many amazing fics out there that i can’t even comprehend you first start reading like honestly thERE ARE LIKE A MILLION THIS FANDOM IS AMAZING WRITERS IM BLESSED but what can help is going on bellarkefanfiction onto the fic rec tag, thats where i usually go to find fics im looking for, or to go read :) never fails me! You could also go on my ff tag where i reblog fics sometimes, you can find one shots/drabbles there as well!! happy hunting!! and if you want some actual fic recs, just continue reading for my answer to the other anons:) 

and as for my other two lovely anons, i have read a lot of fics latley dEAR JESUS LIKE IDK WHATS UP WITH ME BUT I HAVE BEEN STAYING UP LATE TO READ FICS TILL THE CRACK ASS OF DAWN BUT HERE ARE SOME I HAVE RECENTLY READ THAT ARE FANTASTIC (I THINK SOON I WILL MAKE A FIC REC PAGE) (IM OBSESSED WITH THESE LIKE I HAVE BEEN ROLLING AROUND WHILE RE-READING THESE THE PAST FEW DAYS)

  • We Own The Sky (I READ THIS LAST NIGHT AND I AM OBSESSED, I WISH I HAD ALL THE CHAOTE RS NOW IM ITICHING FOR THE NEXT OEN FHSFKS LIKE I LVOE IT SO MUCH I WANT A FIC OF THE FIC THAT SPEAKS VOLUMES I HAVE A WEAKNESS FOR GANG RELATED TYPE THINGS)
  • Darkest Of Marks (MOTHERU FUCKER YOU AHVE NO DI AE HOW MCUH PA IN I WA SIN REAIDNG THIS BUT YOU HAVE T READ IT NOW OK BUT BRING YOUR TISSUES)
  • The Conversation (THIS IS ALL FLUFF ALL FUCKING FLUFF AND IT S HAPPINESS AND THANK CHRIST BC THIS IS SOMETHING WE ALL NEED TO READ AFTER THE SEASON FINALE)
  • If I Should Fall Behind (READ THIS ALSO LAST NIGHT UNTIL 4 AM BC I COULDN’T PUT IT DOWN OH MGY OD ITS AMAIZNG ALSO FLUFF/SOME ANGST AND BELLARKE BABIES NEED I SAY MORE???)
  • Slow It Down (SHIT SHTISHF OK THIS FU CKED ME U P SO GOOD AND I CRI ED READING IT I HAVE READ IT LIKE 4 TIMES THAT SHOULD BE ENOUGH TO READ IT)
  • In My House on the Hill (there is room for you still) (I HAE ALSO READ THIS MORE THAN 10 TIMES ITS ON OF MY FAVS EVER YOU SHOULDN’T EVEN CONTEMPLATE READING IT YOU NEED TOO I INSIST JFC THJFKD)
  • An Ocean between the Waves (*SCREECHES* EVEYTHIGN ABOUT THIS CAUSES ME PAIN AND I READ IT WHEN I FEEL LIKE CRYING AND ALSO SMILING IT S ALSO ONE OF MY FAV ONE SHOTS EVER SO GOGOGOGOGO)
  • You Should Say Hi (OH MY GOD OH GMY D GOY DMY O *SLITHERS AROUND THE FLOOR* TH IIS FUCKIGN FIC OK OH GMY OD TIS EVERYTHING I HAVE WANTED ROLELD INTO ONE BELLAMY BLAKE A DETECTIVE AND BELLARKE FLUFF AND DRAMA IT IS FANTASTIC IT WAS LIKE WATCHING A MOVIE I ALSO READ THIS OVER AGAIN TOO TRU ST ME READ IT N OW)
  • Trip On Love (THIS IS STILL WIP (WORK IN PROGESS) AND IM DYING FOR MORE AND ITS ALSO ANOTHER ONE OF MY FAVS AND JFC I MIGHT AS WELL SAY THESE ARE ALL MY FAVS BUT STILL I LOVE THIS FIC SO MU CH SOOOO MUCH OGH MYD *FANS SELF*)

I THINK IM GONNA END UP MAKING A FIC REC TODAY BC I COULD KEEP GOING THERE ARE SO MANY BUT HERE ARE SOME FOR STARTERS :)