i feel like i should explain

Dear people reading this, 

This is not one of my usual letters. I’ve lately been getting some concerned (and sometimes angry) messages of people who dislike my use of the words “kids” and “Mommy” and I’d like to address these concerns and explain why i use them. 

The idea for this blog came to me during the holidays. I was thinking about how many lgbt+ kids feel lonely during Christmas because they’re surrounded by unsupportive relatives and wished a nice mom would just send each of them a uplifting letter. The thought got stuck in my brain and after a few weeks, i finally told myself, “Why sit around and think a nice mom should do that? I can be that nice mom who does it!”. I figured a blog would be ideal to publish those letters, so any kid or teen who likes them can read them. Then, i found myself wondering why i should limit it to a letter for the holidays. Why not publish letters year round as a long-term source of support? And so, “letters-to-lgbt-kids” was born.  

While the blog grew, i noticed that not only kids but people of different age groups seemed to find comfort in my words, so i broadened the range of topics but i always strive to keep the blog safe for 12-year-olds (the age minimum according to tumblr’s guidelines). 

It has never been my intent to belittle or insult lgbt+ adults by calling them my kids. I certainly would never go up to a lgbt+ stranger in public and say “Aww, you’re my cute little gay child.” As an lgbt+ adult myself, i fully agree that doing so would be demeaning and downright creepy. I also never meant the message of my letters to be “lgbt+ people are all silly cute little kids who should not get taken seriously” and i’m fully aware that there are lgbt+ people - kids and adults alike - who will find my letters ridiculous and prefer less “cute” online resources. 

I’d like to apologize to anyone who felt uncomfortable reading my letters or felt insulted by my choice of words. They were meant as a cute way to bring some positivity and support to lgbt+ youth and it honestly breaks my heart to feel like they caused pain instead. 

With all my love, 

The person behind “Tumblr Mommy” 

anonymous asked:

Thank u for your post and explaining which ending you should use when! Since a lot of other korean speakers are literally bashing and making one feel guilty for not speaking korean

((Ahh, no problemo! I feel like its really unfair to bash people for making a simple mistake especially when they are doing their best and trying to make something they are passionate about like comics or fanfictions. I also dont like when Koreans/ Korean speakers start thinking too highly of themselves just because we share the same ethnicity as our faves. We all love the same things/people, so lets just share the love and help each other improve.

Just keep doing what you do and dont mind the haters.))


kmn483  asked:

You have a rather intimidating appearance. Has anyone been afraid of you before they really got to know you?

I’m…..not myself when I get angry, ever since the incident I don’t like talking about….Maybe I should explain the story, but when I feel like talking about it, I never even told Derpy the story. I think I should tell her first.

anonymous asked:

I'm writing to you for advice. My mom is embarrassed by me. We used to go out & eat weekly, but now we have been staying home more and more for meals. Yesterday, we picked up carry out & a person complimented my beard. In the car, my mom asked when I was planning on dropping the charades & going to act like a woman again. I have been out 3 years-I'm hurt. She only acts this way in public. We have a family reunion soon. Should I skip the reunion? Should I start skipping meals w/ my mom? Thanks!

I think you should do what you want. If you’re just uncomfortable being around your mom / family, don’t feel like you have to be with them. You can take a break temporarily or distance yourself forever, whatever you need to take care of yourself. 

However, if you want to work on improving your relationship I think you should talk to her, explain your feelings and what you will do and how you will feel if she keeps this up. Either face to face or via text / letter. She might not understand that what she is saying affects you. 

- Emil

anonymous asked:

Hi! I'm a 16 almost 17 FTM and I've been trying to get over my major dysphoria by wearing lose clothing to hide my curves but I only have so many shirts. I came out to my parents but they said to wait till after highschool to do anything but I don't feel like I can wait that long. Should I save up money to buy a binder without them knowing or just ask for one so I can get used to the feeling of flat chested before doing therapy?

You can ask them if you feel they will let you. You can tell them that it will make you feel better and you can take it off so it is not a set thing. It is only temporary. Explain how dysphoria is negatively affecting you. If you feel like they will not approve, save money up to buy it. I do not know your family situation so I cannot give you a 100% good answer. It is up to you to feel out the situation. Some families who tell their kids to wait after high-school allow their kids to have binders while others don’t. 


Get to Know Your Deck Spread

Here’s a lovely spread for all of you out there who are new to tarot, recently received a new deck, struggle with bonding with your deck(s) and/or are having issues getting clear or understanding readings. Sometimes decks have personalities to them, they have their own likes, dislikes, alignments and even preferred ‘work’ to go into. They also often require bonding to get the most accurate smooth readings. I have explained before the differences in my decks and what they like to answer, and I know of others who struggle bonding or understanding who their decks are. This spread should be of help!

1. How is your deck feeling today? Are they in a good mood ready to work? Or are they just having an off bad day? I have found decks, like people, can have moody bad days. These days their readings may be harsher than usual or even not even slightly logical. Its good to see what mood your deck is in before using it for readings, especially readings for others (and especially if they are paying for them). This may also affect the questions they will wish to answer.

2. What element does your deck align with? All decks are different and some may align themselves with specific elements. Is your deck fire, water, earth, air, spirit or a combination of them? This may affect the manner which they read. Air decks may be more interested in giving creative advice and focus on individuality, free-spirited natures, the arts, and even love. Water decks tend to focus on emotions and seeking gentle fixes. Fire decks tend to be the most assertive, they are competitive, encouraging, brave, passionate but also tend to support the idea of feuds. Fire decks, also from my experience, tend to be very blunt about things. Earth aligned decks tend to be a bit calmer, they focus on bonds with people such as family and friendships. They also focus on careers, prosperity and money matters. Spirit decks, tend to like to do more of the ‘divine’. They focus on self-enlightenment, self discovery and communicating with supernatural forces, guides, and deities.

3. What Questions does your deck enjoy answering? Does your deck enjoy answering questions about love? Friends and family? Do they enjoy giving personal advice? Do they like money matters and career focuses. This could determine what questions they may be the most accurate and ones they will give the best advice on.

4. What Questions does your deck least like to answer? These are the questions they may not have the most accurate advice on. Such as my Rider deck greatly dislikes romance questions so I never use him for them because he will always just advice break-ups no matter the situation.

5. What is your deck’s current feelings towards you? Does your deck feel close to you? Is it a strong professional business bond? Or is it more like a friendship? Do they feel distant from you? Like you ignore them? Do they not understand you or feel like you are a stranger? Do you intimidate them?

6. How can you improve your relationship? How does your deck feel like you two can do to help build your relationship? Practice more or perhaps make spreads.

7. A Negative trait. Pretty self explanatory, this is a negative quality about your deck that it feels you have a right to know about. Take note that this is a negative trait in the mind and views of your deck, its something it feels is negative.

8. A Positive trait. Again, pretty self explanatory, this is a trait that your deck feels is a positive trait it has. Again, this is a trait seen as positive in its mind.

I was trying to explain my political philosophy to someone, and the only words that didn’t feel wrong in my mouth were, “evidence-based ameliorist.”

I believe in whatever works to make shit better.  I believe our decisions should not be informed by lofty and distant ideas, but the concrete evidence of what works and what doesn’t.  What helps people survive? What helps them thrive? What sounds like a great idea but never works in real life?

I believe in politics informed by legitimate social sciences. Social policy informed by statistics, not scripture.  Financial policy that safeguards the future instead of being penny-wise and pound-foolish.  Political conversations based in careful examination of what’s actually being proposed, not ignorant discussions of ideals.

This isn’t some revolutionary thing I’m talking about.  This is how I’m used to cities, regions, countries, being governed.  Because good governance is more often about coalitions of evidence-based ameliorists with very different ideologies, than ideologically pure groups of people who reject anyone who believes differently than they do.

Does anyone else occasionally find magical healing a really, deeply irritating detail to account for, when writing in settings that have it?

I mean, don’t get me wrong. At the end of the day trying to make sure that physical injuries have stakes usually leads to fun worldbuilding about what magic is and isn’t capable of doing, and how many people possess the specialized knowledge and/or expertise to fix really serious injuries, and what non-magical medicine looks like in a world where it’s developed alongside other forms of medicine, and the psychological effects of magical healing, and the like. But sometimes I’m feeling lazy and I just want to be able to hurt my characters without immediately having to explain to the reader why they should care, damn it.

Lay it on me- Jughead Jones

Pairing: Jughead x Reader

Description: This is a continuation of “Wipe it off of me”, reader wants to try some stuff out with her boyfriend ;-D

(Read Part 1 )



The next day after what happened with Jughead, I immediately went to Veronica. She was my best friend, and I trusted her completely with my life, so I also trusted the fact that she would explain to me what the hell I should be doing when it comes to…..things like this.

“Veronica, I just, I’m not entirely sure how I feel about all this kinky stuff, but I know that if there’s somebody I’m comfortable enough with, it’s him, And Jughead, sometimes with the way he is, he, he…” I trailed off, crossing one leg over the other on Veronica’s mattress.

“Turns you on?” Veronica asked, a giggly tone in her voice as she spun around in her vanity chair to look at me.

“Yes.” I admitted, heat spreading across my cheeks quickly.

“Girl, I get what you mean, every time I see Betty in that cheer uniform-” Veronica dramatically draped herself over her chair, fanning herself with her hand. “ my gay ass heart just can’t handle it.” I rolled my eyes before standing up and swatting her in the arm.

“I’m serious, Ronnie! Jughead does.. Things to me! Things I’m not used to feeling! Things I seriously don’t like-” I cut myself off, groaning loudly in sexual frustration, and flopping back down on to Veronica’s bed face up. My arms sprawled out across the duvet and I sighed, turning my head to look at my friend now looking down at me.

“ He’s going to be the death of me, Ronnie. He really is.”

“Cheer up sunshine. Let me show you a few things first.”


I had left Ronnie’s house with a lot of ideas, and I planned to use them this weekend. The knowledge she had given gave me somewhat a surge of confidence, and I was positive that the rain check I had made with Jughead would be worth it. It was the next weekend when I finally acted upon my ideas.

My mom was going away for the weekend, which meant I would have the house all to myself.The last bell had rang, signaling to the students that they had just been relinquished their freedom and were free to leave the torturous hell that was Riverdale High (ok, maybe it wasn’t that bad, but I’m a drama queen). I saw Jughead standing in front of his locker, rummaging through It while Archie leaned against the locker beside him, hands moving as he told Jughead something. I quickly moved from in between Betty and Veronica, quickly making my way to my boyfriend. I grabbed his shoulder as he stood facing away, pulling him down backwards so my lips brushed against his neck, and whispered.

“My house, tonight. I wanna make good use of that rain-check.” I let go of Jughead, my hand pushing him slightly and his body sprang back in to his previous position, his mouth open. I was halfway down the hall when he turned around, and I just giggled before winking and blowing him a kiss.


Instead of meeting Jughead at Pop’s, I went straight home, checking to make sure my mom had left for her trip. When I saw the empty driveway, I knew I was in the clear. I ran inside and up to my room, dropping my bag and trying to think of my next move. I figured taking a shower was good, so I took a quick one, making sure to shave even though I had done so a couple nights ago. I got out, towel-drying my hair and brushing my teeth before grabbing my nicest pair of bra and underwear. I wasn’t a huge lingerie person, but my mom had bought me a couple nice sets for my birthday, which I was now extremely thankful for.

I threw on a cami and a pair of (extremely short) shorts afterwards, before brushing my hair out and spraying a little perfume. When I was done, I went back down stairs.I occupied myself by getting a little something to drink, and messing around on my phone. I started to almost worry that Jughead wouldn’t show up, and my head started to get the best of me. What if he didn’t want this? What if I freaked him out and potentially ruined our relationship?

A knock at the door interrupted my thoughts, and I padded towards it, unlocking the bolt and swinging it open to see Jughead. He had his hands shoved in his pockets, his head raising to look at me. His eyebrows raised as he took in my appearance.

“Is your mom home?” He asked, stepping inside and locking the door behind him.

“No, she’s gone for the weekend. Business trip.”

“Good.” Jughead quickly had me pinned against the door, his hands wrapping around the back of my thighs and lifting me so my lower body was wrapped around his waist. His lips went to mine, kissing me roughly. My hands went around his neck, knocking his hat off when my fingers curled in to this hair. I tugged lightly and Jughead groaned against my lips. I broke apart from him, panting heavily.

“Do you uh, do you want something to eat?” I asked him, mentally face palming myself. Jughead laughed, his head falling in to the crook of my neck.

“Sure, what’s on the menu?” Jughead responded, lifting his head to look at me. I had an idea to fix the mood I just killed, bringing my lip between my teeth.

“Me.” Jughead looked taken aback for a second before a smug look took over his face.

“Hmm, dessert first. I like that idea.” Jughead leaned back down to kiss me, his lips on mine only for a second before trailing down my jaw and to my neck. Jughead began to litter my neck with dark, purple bruises, his body pressing in to mine. Jughead’s hands traveled down my body, his fingers slipping under my shirt. My breath hitched at the feeling of his warm hands on my cold skin, gripping at my waist firmly.

“M-maybe we should- we should go upstairs.” I panted, my breath heavy. Jughead adjusted his grip on my thighs before complying to my suggestion, stumbling a bit to find the stairs.

“You’re going to break your neck.” I giggled, clinging to his shoulders for dear life.

“Don’t undermine my masculinity.” Jughead pouted, climbing up the staircase with me still in his arms. I laughed at the clumsiness of my boyfriend as he actually managed to make it up the stairs, kicking my door open. Jughead dropped me down on to my bed, my back bouncing against the cool mattress. I sat up, reaching out and gripping Jughead’s jacket and tugging it off of him.

“Eager, are we?” Jughead taunted, helping me pull his jacket off. I rolled my eyes, my hands now going to the sweater underneath his jacket. I pulled it over his head to be met with another shirt.

“What is it with the layers?!” I groaned, my hands now working on getting the short sleeved shirt off. “Really, Forsythe, I thought when I invited you over, you would get the memo to wear less clothing.”

“Unless you wanted me to be a popsicle stick by the time I made it here, that wasn’t happening.” Jughead retorted, his hands going to my tank top.“ Although, I’m pretty sure I woulda been warm in a matter of moments anyways.” Jughead leaned down, his teeth biting gently at the skin on my neck, making my breath hitch in my throat. Jughead pulled my tank top off my body, his hands running down my sides and to my hips before gripping them tightly and pulling me closer to his body.

Jughead and I had had sex only a couple of times, the first time obviously being an awkward and romantic mess, and the second time almost being caught by Archie and Betty, who happened to live across the street from me.Jughead and I weren’t huge on sex, it wasn’t something we wanted to do 24/7 like a lot of the kids at our school, but the both of us had so much pent up sexual frustration lately that we were seconds away from creating tears in our remaining clothes.

Jughead grabbed the waistband of my shorts, slipping them down my thighs. I kicked them off before pushing Jughead over and down on to my bed. I unbuttoned the top of his skinny jeans, pulling them down his legs quickly before straddling Jughead, grinding down in to his hips. Jughead groaned, raising his hips to meet mine and I held them down with my hands, grinding my hips down harder on to him.

“Fuck.” Jughead moaned, his breath becoming heavier. I felt him get harder underneath me and I grinned, glad I was getting the reaction I wanted. I sat up, grabbing one of my scarves hanging off my bed frame and toying with it in my hands.

“You wanna try something?” I looked down at my boyfriend, his eyes wide and fixed upon the fabric slipping between my fingers.

“Lay it on me.” Jughead smirked and I grinned, taking his wrists in my hands. Jughead looked confused as I tied his hands to my bedpost, looking up at me.

“To be honest, I thought the roles would be reversed when you asked.” He chuckled, relaxing under my body.

“We’ve got the whole weekend, babe.” I reached behind my back, unclasping my bra and letting it fall off my shoulders. I flung it aside, my hands now traveling down my boyfriend’s body and running over his hard-on, hidden by the fabric of his boxers. I cupped it lightly before moving away.

“Do you really have to be a tea-ease.” Jughead groaned when my hand dipped under the elastic, wrapping my hand around him firmly. I slowly pumped my hand up and down, Jughead’s breathing becoming rapid. I pulled my hand down, my fingers pulling his boxers off and slipping my underwear off after. I leaned over Jughead’s body, grabbing a condom from the drawer of my nightstand.

I took the end of the foil package between my teeth, ripping it open. I was met with the gross taste of lube and a disgusted look swept across my face quickly.

“Why didn’t you just…. Open it with your hands??” Jughead tilted his head, stifling a laugh at my reaction to the flavorless substance.

“Veronica said it’d be sexier.” I scoffed, pulling the condom out of the package.“ Last time I take her advice.”

“Wait, you went to Veronica for advice on sex?” Jughead sat up a bit. I pushed him back down with my hand, looking shocked at my surprise burst of dominance.

“Jughead, I’m literally about to sit on your dick. Please don’t ruin the mood.” I pinched the tip of the condom, rolling it down Jughead’s penis. Jughead laid back down, eyes wide and looking at me. My knees went to either side of Jughead hips, my hand guiding him as I slowly sank down on to him. My hands went to my chest, my lower body feeling a bit tight and uncomfortable. When my thighs reached Jughead’s hips, I stopped, giving myself a moment to adjust before slowly beginning to rise up and sink back down on to him. I tried to keep a steady pace, my legs burning as I grinded down on to Jughead’s dick.

Jughead’s uneven breathing turned in to small groans and my hands went down his chest, my fingernails leaving scratch marks down his stomach. I began to go faster, already feeling worn out. Jughead’s hair was already starting to stick to his forehead, and my chest was glistening with a thin layer of sweat. I painted, picking up the pace even more and going as fast as I could.

Baby, baby untie me.” Jughead panted, wriggling his arms that were suspended over his head. I paused, leaning over and untying the knot of my scarf. When Jughead was free he immediately sat up, his arms wrapping around my body as he thrusted in to me. My head fell in to the crook of his shoulder, my nails dragging down the muscles in his back.

F-fuck, Forsythe, I-I’m-” my body tensed, the fuzzy feeling in my lower body and the twitching of my abdomen telling me I was close. Jughead flipped us over so I was on my back, his arms holding him up as he pounded in to me at a rapid pace.

My orgasm hit me like an oncoming train, my nails now digging deep in to Jughead’s skin and my back arching. My vision was blurry, colors and stars clouding my sight. Jughead came a few moments later, collapsing on top of my body. My arms went around his neck, my hands playing with the ends of his hair as I tried to calm my breathing.

Jughead eventually pulled out of me, his body leaving mine for a moment to discard the used condom before grabbing his sweater. He climbed back on to the bed, his hands pulling my body up in to a sitting position before pulling the sweater over my head.

“You know, I can dress myself. I’m not five.” I teased, pulling my arms through the sleeves of the long sweater. The end of the fabric went to my knees, reminding me of how tiny I was compared to my beanstalk of a boyfriend.

“I know.” Jughead was standing up, his boxers now on and his shirt slipping over his head. I raised my arms up, making grabby hands at him.

“Well if you’re going to treat me like I’m 5, then I demanded to be carried to the kitchen.” I pouted. Jughead turned to me, a grin on his face.

“As you wish.” Jughead’s arms went under my body, listing up like I was a feather. I squealed, clinging to him as he kicked my door open.

“So, why the kitchen?” Jughead asked, now carrying me back down the stairs he had carried me up about an hour ago.

“Well, I made dinner, and then after we ate, I thought we could test how sturdy the island in my kitchen is.” I bit my lip, looking at Jughead.

“I’m honestly convinced that I died and I have gone to heaven.” Jughead shook the fringe out of his face, dipping his head down and pressing his lips to mine.

Okay so I’ve been reading the comments lately on my Instagram and Twitter.. A lot of you are fighting about the whole mom/queen thing. So I should probably explain how I feel about it. I do not want to be looked at as your queen. I do not want to be put on a pedestal. I am not your mother. BUT I am here to be your friend. I write music to express myself because otherwise I would go crazy. I’m not a perfect human being, and we are never going to agree on every little thing. But I want to be able to open up to you guys without feeling like I’ll be judged/bullied. When I was honest and told you guys I smoke weed some of you wrote things like “I wish I knew that before I bought her album” it blew my mind because it should just be about the music. It shouldn’t be about me being the perfect little role model for you guys because I have never once ever pretended to be that. And I won’t ever try to be. It’s impossible. I’m just figuring things out myself, I’m gonna make so many mistakes but I’ll learn from them and grow as a person just like anyone else. I won’t judge you if you open up to me, so don’t judge me.


nothisisstiles  asked:

Could you explain what rape culture is? I feel really stupid asking that, but I'm trying to educate myself on stuff like this. K thanks BYEE

Don’t feel stupid! No one should ever feel bad about wanting to further understand something.

Rape culture, in a nutshell, is society being comfortable with or ignoring, sexually aggressive behavior. This can be as big as rape or something less physically invasive like yelling sexually aggressive things at people.

Our society has somewhat of a double standard with this. If you asked any person you’d almost certainly get the answer “rape is horrible” & “sexually assault is unacceptable”. However, when it actually happens in society the reaction is somewhat different.

People will excuse people’s behavior. They’ll say it was
“boy’s talk”
“locker room talk”
“she was drunk”
“She shouldn’t dress like that”
“What did she expect to happen when she walked home alone?”
“She led him on”


It’s Donald Trump, Brock Turner, Bill Cosby…

It’s also the Republican Senators and Congressmen you hear about when they say that “rape can be turned into a beautiful thing because it was God’s will and makes miracles from ashes”.

Wikipedia has a good description of it:
Behaviors commonly associated with rape culture include victim blaming, sexual objectification, trivializing rape, denial of widespread rape, refusing to acknowledge the harm caused by some forms of sexual violence, or some combination of these.

Hopefully this is helpful and I explained it well enough. It’s somewhat of an abstract idea that I find kind of hard to put into words.

anonymous asked:

i asked that question about only answering rude questions to prove a point, and i feel you have. i've constantly asked questions and gave comments that i feel are something an author would like to hear from a reader yet those sat in your ask box, but you answered that question quicker than i imagined, probably because it criticized your character. idk if you want this input, but i feel as if you should focus on the positives people send in, not the negative and rude, like i sent in earlier xoxo

I’ve explained many times that I am free to answer whatever asks I want, and I’m free to not answer whatever I wish. 

Usually I don’t answer if it’s: 

-an overly complicated ask that would require me to either invent lore on the spot or do a lore dive that is too time intensive

-it’s an ask I’ve recently answered

-an ask I’ve answered many times

-a very common ask that I’ve answered in most interviews (i.e. what inspires you, how did you come up with RQ, etc.)

-it’s a spoiler ask (I’m not answering spoiler heavy KC questions at all, let alone people asking if characters live or die)

-it’s extremely rude or ignorant (trust me, there are ones I let slide bc I just am not going to deal with it sometimes)

-it’s very kind and complimentary to the point where I would feel really rude and self-indulgent and bratty answering it publicly for all to see. I love you guys for your kind words but idk, it just feels so crude to acknowledge yourself in that way. 

-I just don’t have the *energy* to answer the ask the way it deserves

-I just. don’t. feel. like. it.

I’m very sorry that I haven’t lived up to your expectations or answered the questions you wanted asks. I’m one person. I cleared my inbox entirely about two weeks ago. I now have 843 asks in the box. I can’t answer them all. I’m very sorry about that. 

And if you’ve been asking questions over a period of time, then you would have clearly seen that I answer a wide variety of questions. So yeah, I don’t appreciate you sending me something false just to get a reaction and prove a point. But you did. You win. I’m tired.

I love you guys so much and I hope to give back 1% of what you’ve given me. I know I’m not perfect and I’m never, ever going to amount to what everyone wants from me. I’m trying, I really am. It’s just not in my DNA to let people run me over for their own enjoyment. And it may be better in the long run to step back a little bit, because unfortunately, in spite of the truckloads of lovely asks & readers, the not-so-nice ones seem to outweigh them in my mind. I need to work on myself to ignore the sting, but I’m not there yet. 

As I’ve said on Twitter, I’m not a dartboard. I’m a person. I’m not some abyss people can fling whatever they want into, and not expect anything in return. 

And if people want to go on Goodreads and give me shit for being a human concerned about her mental health and safety, feel free. They can say it’s part of the job all you want, but it really isn’t. It really isn’t. 

morning suprise! @luxjii 

oh man… have soo much things to say to you.. but first.. thank you, seriously. I still confused, why someone so nice like you can be chatting with me. We started talking when I was depressed af, you made me change in some stange way, I’m bad at explaining… idk man,, I really feel happy. Your happiness is good 4 all.. and I really feel bad when you’re sad… but i suck at giving advice?? Just…….. aaAA,,, ily, you deserve being happy all ur life 

thanks for being the best <3

Grounding Theory and Application

Recently I was asked by wrecklessheartofg0ld and devinaswitchyhaven to describe my personal method of grounding because I don’t use the ‘growing roots’ method that I see a lot of people using. The way I describe my method would be more along the lines of ‘equalising myself’ and ‘connecting to the web’.

The reason I describe my method of grounding in this way is because, for me, grounding is a lot like equalising the pressure when you go scuba diving.  And you do this by ‘connecting to the web’ and letting yourself ‘equalise the pressure’ you feel from spellcasting or energy work.

If my analogy doesn’t make sense at the moment I promise I’ll go into greater detail later but first I should probably explain what grounding is and why you should do it for the people who have never come across the term.

Alright. So the term Grounding actually comes from the process of electrical grounding in which an object is allowed to discharge (get rid of its excess charge). If an object is negatively charged, grounding lets excess electrons to flow from the object into the earth, and if an object is positively charged, electrons flow from the earth into the object.

Within the magical community, this process of electrical grounding has been applied to create the witchy equivalent (though really it’s almost the same process and it’s called the same name).

This is based on the theory that magic is a form of energy and when a witch casts spells or practices energy work, it’s likely that they’ll end up with either too much or not enough personal energy. For a witch this can be an extremely uncomfortable experience especially if you are close to either side of the spectrum (i.e. very little personal energy or way too much personal energy).

Unfortunately there are also physical symptoms which usually accompany being unequalised such as headaches, migraines, uncomfortable buzzing sensations under the skin, nausea, vomiting, pain, irritability, insomnia and exhaustion. The symptoms are typically worse the further out of alignment you are.

Grounding also helps people who practice astral travel, dreamwork, journeying, and hedge hopping with reconnecting with ‘reality’ and feeling like you’re ‘in the now’ and present in the world.

Overall, grounding serves two purposes:

  • It stabilises and equalises your personal energy
  • It reconnects you with the earth and it’s systems (what I like to call ‘the web’) and helps you focus on reality and being ‘in the now’

In a perfect world, witches would learn how to ground before attempting to perform any magic or energy work, but unfortunately I see a lot of witches jump straight into casting spells without thinking of what it can to them.  Grounding really is an essential skill for any witch who wants to keep practicing witchcraft without horrible side effects.

So while there are many grounding techniques available, this one is my personal method. If this method does not work for you I would recommend looking at the classic ‘growing roots’ method.  

Connecting to the Web

Everything has its own energy/frequency/vibration/magic. Whatever you want to call it – everything has it. To ground effectively you need to be able to connect to this mass of energy and equalise your own personal energy.

For me, I visualise all of this energy as an intricately interwoven web (like a spider’s web or the internet); a mass of connections each transmitting their own energy and connecting to the whole. This is why I call it connecting to the web. Because for me, it is a web.

I developed this method of grounding because I found that I didn’t always have the time to sit down on the ground outside and sometimes it’s not appropriate (for example: At work or in the middle of class. Really whenever you feel that you need to equalise the pressure of either too much energy or not enough).

1)      First you have to visualise your own energy. You can do this sitting down, standing up, listening to a lecture, watching tv, sitting at your computer – ANYWHERE. You can close your eyes if that helps you however if you close your eyes for a long time in a public place this will become quite noticeable. The more you practice the faster you will be.

2)      Then you need to visualise ‘the web’. You won’t see all of it. You should be able to see the energy of the world around you and how it connects to each other. You won’t see the whole web. Maybe if you were out in space you could, but down here on earth you can only see the bits around you.

3)      You’re already connected to the web. That’s the best part. As a living, breathing organism which has its own personal energy; you are already connected. You just needed to be able to see it so you can get yourself back into alignment again. You should see a little tendril of energy coming from you and connecting to the web. You need to reinforce that connection.

I’m not gonna lie; grounding is hundred times easier if you can stand barefoot on the ground or sit outside with your palms resting on the ground. However, like I said earlier, that’s not always an option.

4)      Now for the equalising process. Like with scuba diving, I found the best way to equalise the pressure from either too much energy or not enough is to breathe. I know this may sound ridiculously simple – but it works. Take deep breaths and as you breathe in, draw in energy from the web. As you breathe out, send out your own energy to mingle with the web.

5)      It may take a few repetitions but you should feel settled once you finish. That buzzing under your skin will be gone and you will feel lighter and refreshed.

And that’s my method. Now I know some people recommend grounding every month or every week but really you should ground every day. I know that may seem like way too much work, but it really isn’t. The more you ground the faster and better you’ll be at it, so if you do it every day it becomes second nature. The second you start to feel off or out of alignment – equalise.

I hope this helps!

- Marci

A Suggestion for People Who Have been Accused of  Using Homophobic Language

I don’t think anyone should ever have to explain to their friends or society why using a slur hurts them. If your friend tells you that you referring to everything from mild inconveniences to poor choices by movie directors as “gay” is language that offends him… just stop it, okay? Don’t make him beg.

That said, I’m a gay man, and I’ve got some time on my hands, and I feel like explaining my viewpoint on this. But I’ll be brief.

I always like to start off saying that these are my personal thoughts on the subject: I’m just one guy. I could put all kinds of links here about how using that sort of language in your day to day life is demeaning and hurtful and bad for everybody, but I like to be transparent: if I did that, I’d just be typing “Using ‘gay’ as a synonym for ‘bad’” into Google and posting the links, and you could do that for yourself.

To people who makes joke about softball whenever a woman with short hair walks by, or who think “faggot” is a perfect substitute for “fool”, I hope to provide a little different perspective on the issue.

Kindly but Clueless Heterosexual Friend

I have a friend—grew up in conservative Texas, a real boy’s club ex-soldier—who was super supportive of me when I came out to him, and to this day is one of the most encouraging heterosexual friends I’ve ever had. When I told him I was gay, he decided he was going to stop saying “That’s gay” when he meant “I don’t like that.”

He felt like it was bad to say things like this, but confessed he didn’t know why though: he’d just seen around the internet that language like that was not preferred, and now that he had a gay friend, he felt a responsibility to start behaving differently.

When Everyone Buys the Same Clothes…

I described it like this:

Growing up in rural Wisconsin, the Green Bay Packers were a religion: people wore Green&Gold to church on game days, and the service usually ended early or was cancelled altogether so folks could get home for the game.

I never liked football—I was into playing soccer and watching baseball—and in fact hated how Packer fever took over the house every Sunday. I didn’t pretend to like the Packers, made my disdain known in that teen way.

But about 60% of any given thrift shop’s stock was Packer clothes, so about 60% of my clothes were second-hand Packers stuff. To anyone on the street, I was perfectly camouflaged as any old Packers fan, even though I didn’t want to be. If they asked, I’d go OFF about how I hated the Packers. But I only ‘talked’ to about 2% of the people who saw me where those colors.

Don’t Be Their Camouflage

To my friend, then:

Yeah, I know you are not a homophobe! You say things are ‘gay’ when you mean ‘disfavorable.’ You make jokes about pillow-biters, or about how any dude receiving a manicure must be gay somehow and should apologize. You say “no homo” after complimenting your friend. You make jokes about how long so-and-so’s been staring in the locker room. When you got owned in in Overwatch, you called that guy a ‘fag’.

I know that you are incredibly supportive of gay rights, and of my comfort and happiness in particular. Thanks, friend. You’re not a homophobe.

But you’re wearing their colors, at the end of the day. You’re pretty much indistinguishable from a homophobe. When I go out to a bar and a guy is talking like that: he could either be just some guy, ‘talking like guys do’, or he could be someone who’s going to try to jump me in the bathroom. Seriously, the spectrum’s pretty wide.

Bare Minimum ‘Activism’

I suppose, in my view, this little essay isn’t even ‘activism’: I’m not trying to convince anyone (in this post anyhow!) that it’s okay to be gay. If you’re reading this, you already think that. Here’s what I suggest:

We can’t see camouflaged allies. And we can’t see a threat when it’s dressed up in the same language everyone is using.

Let’s leave this language to the homophobes, huh? Let’s just remove the question altogether. If I walk into a bar and hear some guy tease his friend about being a ‘queer’ because he didn’t notice how hot the woman who just walked by was, can I just assume automatically that I am not safe around that man? Don’t camouflage yourself with homophobes, okay?

Do I think that this change will gradually do our society some good? Yeah, I mean, for sure, right? If only the homophobes are talking like homophobes, then hating gays isn’t normal any more, is it? It’s a special position with its own special vocabulary—like Flat Earthers or people who knit.

No need to go “Woah, buddy! It is not politically correct to call a guy ‘gay’ just because he wears pastels!” Use your friend’s slur as an opportunity to find out if your buddy is indeed a homophobe, you can even be nice about it. Ask away. Do I think there are steps you should take AFTER that? Sure. But this essay is getting long.

Homophobes are not going to work to distinguish themselves in our culture: they’re going to keep using those ‘things that everybody I knew grew up saying!’ So let them have that language, please? Just please help us ID them. If you don’t camouflage yourself as one of them, they can’t camouflage themselves as non-homophobes.

If you’re not a Packer fan, don’t dress like you love the team.

If you’re not a homophobe, don’t talk like you’re on their side.

Thoughts on explaining brain fog that doesn’t fit ADHD stereotypes to a psychiatrist [avoid if discussion of stimulant medication, psychiatry, or brain fog causes you distress]

I had an illuminating conversation today with a psychiatrist, trying to explain what I call my “bad brain days.”

It helped me understand where neurotypical professionals can get confused and misunderstand, when trying to help people with ADHD get unstuck.

I have days where I don’t have the energy to do anything mentally taxing, especially writing. Should I attempt to write, I just sit there expending willpower, yet nothing comes out, until I get frustrated and give up.

Now, I forget this sometimes, but getting stuck like this can come with many different internal experiences. Some people with ADHD get stuck because they feel anxious and overwhelmed. Some get stuck because they are constantly interrupted by distracting thoughts or sensory stimuli. Some just can’t get motivated.  The psychiatrist, being a thoughtful and caring person, asked if each of these different ADHD problems was what I experienced. 

I told him, they were not. Well, I have experienced each of these things, but they’re not what I mean by a bad brain day, or brain fog, or fatigue. Moreover, I can deal with them if I’m not having one of these bad brain days.

Rather than constant racing thoughts, or distracting sensations, I experience a complete mental blank. The only thing I experience (other than frustration and anxiety about being in this state) is a feeling of painless pressure inside my head, as if the space that would normally be filled with thoughts were stuffed with cotton balls. I forgot to tell him, but I move slowly, too. It takes a while to reply when people talk to me, and if I try to play a real-time video game, I get killed constantly. 

It’s as if everything–thinking, moving, and most of my emotions and conscious perception–ceased to function for no apparent reason, and I lost access to all the capabilities I normally have. Ironically, I even lose most of my capability to get distracted.

I told him what it was like to sit on the couch and will yourself to stand up and not be able to do so. As if your actions were a horse and your will were a rider and the reins had been cut, as someone on Tumblr memorably put it. To finally get back the ability to move by forcibly, with agonizing effort, moving your little finger or toe the tiniest fraction.

I told him, this isn’t distraction, this isn’t anxiety, and it’s not lack of motivation. It happens when I want to do things, they’re important and urgent, and I’m telling myself to do them with every bit of willpower I can muster. What I’m experiencing seems more like the fatigue people with certain chronic illnesses describe, only I have yet to discover any organic cause for my fatigue, and perhaps there isn’t one.

It’s like a car, I said. Suppose you have a really nice sports car and you’re a great driver, but you can’t get the car to start.

Now, suppose your sports car has brakes and steering that act up sometimes. You’re a good driver and you’re used to the car, so you can handle that. But you can’t even get to dealing with that if you can’t start the car in the first place.

And that’s where I get stuck. Yes, I struggle with time estimation, organization, and remembering to remember, but I can deal with those, so they don’t disable me as much. But all my knowledge about ADHD and coping strategies don’t work when I can’t muster the energy to move or think, much less implement those strategies. 

He tried to paraphrase, saying something like, “so it’s trouble getting started?”

Well, yes, but not entirely. It’s trouble getting started. It’s trouble continuing. It’s trouble stopping, and trouble switching. It’s trouble doing anything but playing Sudoku, looking at Pinterest, or browsing Twitter and Tumblr. Or sleeping.

That’s why I take stimulant medications and drink coffee.

He asked what happened when I took stimulants. What sort of effects did I feel like they had?

Without them, on a bad brain day, I’d be at 10-20% of my capabilities. With them, I’m up to maybe 40-50%. Not enough to write, but enough to take care of myself, even clean up around the house a bit. Enough to feel alive.

I doubt he’ll ever fully know what this feels like, but I think I was able to communicate that there’s yet another way to get stuck, besides the ones he knows well. I think he knows what he calls “activation” and I call “lack of energy” causes me more distress than any other ADHD symptom. I’m grateful that he asked, and hope he’ll be better prepared to help others who have energy problems like mine.

Okay, so the McHanzo community has basically accepted Rockruff as McCree’s official Pokemon companion. Like, there’s no debate about it – Rockruff, and subsequently Lycanroc’s midday form, are the perfect embodiments of Jesse McCree.

For those who aren’t familiar with the game, every Pokemon has a “shiny” version of themselves you can capture (with enough effort put into it). The shiny Pokemon are (usually) a completely different color than the original version, that way you can tell when you’ve come across one. 

Anyways, I’m explaining all this for a specific reason. Guess what color the shiny version of Rockruff/Lycanroc is?


So basically, shiny Rockruff/Lycanroc is the same color as Hanzo and I feel like that’s a really cool piece of information everyone should know.


Part 1
Part 2

Request: Hi i was hoping I could get a Peter Parker x Reader request and this would take place during the Civil War and the reader would be Tony’s niece? She always hangs out at The Avengers Tower and lives there with Tony since she interns there and helps Bruce and her uncle out in the lab. She also goes to school with Peter and she finds out that he is Spider-Man from Tony and she gets really mad that Peter didn’t tell her himself. He really likes her and the rest of the avengers get him to ask her out Oh! Maybe Peter could be overprotective? I would love to see an overprotective Peter!

A/N: THIS IS MY FIRST PETER PARKER IMAGINE!! It’s soooo long… There were a lot of things I wanted to add and I always feel like I should explain some stuff in the imagine so you understand what’s going on. Hopefully you’ll like this! The timeline doesn’t fit perfectly with the movie so… i hope it’s fine.

Pairing: Peter Parker x reader

Words: 6,030 (TOLD YOU IT’S LONG)

Warning(s): Fighting, that’s kinda it.

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Liam Payne Is A Teddy Bear (A Masterpost Of Liam Smiling)

Because when you’re sad or feeling blue or just plain okay, you just need a lil itsy tiny bit of Leeyum smiling to feel better.

He lights up like a christmas tree on steroids

 I call this trying not to cry, end up crying a lot

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anonymous asked:

Honestly I would have loved if Crowfeather had more development and maybe even became/becomes leader of WC. Like he should still have his stubborn personality but just like, more mature and idk how to explain it but I feel like the Erin's could have given more and done a lot with his character and he just deserved better

ok i’ve talked abt this before but i am 100% a firm believer that crowfeather was set up to become windclan’s deputy/leader (very similar to brambleclaw). His uncle Onestar was leader, his mother Ashfoot was deputy and his father Deadfoot had also been deputy, and he was the chosen Windclan cat to lead the clans to their new home. I imagine that even though he was a new warrior, that he held pretty high status in Windclan and it was assumed that he would take over Ashfoot’s position.

BUT THEN he runs away with leafpool, and when WC comes to help TC with the badgers, they find him there in the TC camp. Windclan is not forgiving of his actions, so while they do take him back his status/rank in the clan plummets and he is somewhat ostracized in his clan. He takes a mate + kits to prove his loyalty, but no matter what he does WC won’t forget that he chose to run away w a TC med cat and then came crawling back. 

WHICH LEADS US TO why he’s so angry and such a shithead in Po3. He gave up everything (his status/rank/future) to be with Leafpool and no matter what he does he won’t be able to prove himself to his clan. I think part of him blames Leafpool and part of him blames himself for not following through or for even deciding to leave in the first place.

tldr; - crowfeather had the potential to be an interesting character