I would always shy away from the camera just because of my insecurities and constant overthinking. I’m getting through that and gaining more and more confidence each day. Not gonna lie, I feel so good right now 😍
“Everyone lies: ‘Oh, getting old is terrible.’ What the fuck are they talking about? It’s so great! Let me count the ways. It takes until you’re 40 for you to have enough money to buy anything—like a bunch of weird chairs, that thing for my cat, the stuff for the web comic. You can’t afford a comic made of tiny things when you’re in your 20s. You need to get to a point in your life when you’ve made connections in your community, and you can do fun artistic projects, and you can buy a couple of movie chairs and have them sent to your apartment. That’s what it means to be 40. You just do whatever the hell you want. It’s awesome!
People say, ‘Oh, being in your 20s is the best.’ Is it? Because I found it very anxiety producing, and sad, and kind of lonely. I feel none of those things now. Life is awesome. And then they say, ‘Oh, you know, you’ll be wrinkled and ugly.’ Wrinkled? Maybe. Ugly? Are you kidding me? I’ve never looked this good. Look at my hair. I just had it done. Ask me how much that cost. I couldn’t spend that much on my hair even in my thirties. Look at this thing. It’s a shirt from a museum. I’m going to get all my clothes from museums. I couldn’t get any clothes from museums when I was in my 20s. Also, I know so much more now. I’m like a genius—just from life. I have all sorts of knowledge.
I feel like we’ve all been lied to by society—that youth is where it’s at. Not really. Youth kind of sucks. It’s thrilling, but it’s also terrifying. I’m not scared of anything now.
Oh, that’s the other thing. It’s the biggest thing. When I turned 30, a friend of mine wrote to me and said, ‘Tell me what you’ve learned. Give me your wisdom at 30.’ I remember reading that and thinking, ‘I have no idea.’ But I thought about it for a couple of days and I wrote back to him. ‘You now? I do have an answer for this: I feel more confident now. And I care a little bit less about what other people think.’ Now, at this age, I don’t give a fuck what people think.
This is how this translates to me. I’ve never attempted to be popular by any definition, which is good, because I certainly haven’t been. But it always killed me to disappoint people. I feel that less now.
You can’t hang anything over my head emotionally because I just don’t care. I don’t feel that I have to impress anyone anymore. It’s awesome!”
I’ve reached over 3000 followers. Thank you everyone for your support. It means a lot to me. I’ve been having trouble with my art the last few months, but now I feel a little more confident and have a better understanding about why I draw. Hope you’ll stay with me as I continue drawing :)
Inspired by the work of one of my favorite artists, Yoshitaka Amano.
This will be my last drawing for a little while. I have to focus on some work I need to finish. I’ll try to post every once in awhile until then.
Request from anon for a Jax x Reader where the reader is Unser’s daughter, and Hale keeps flirting with her so she asks Jax to pretend to be her boyfriend to get him to back off. Enjoy the smut ;)
A/N - I’ve done this a little differently to my other fake boyfriend/girlfriend imagines, as I don’t want to seem repetitive :)
“You don’t even know me. Get to know me, I promise I’ll change your mind.” You’re glad your back is turned as you roll your eyes in annoyance, not sure how long you’re going to be able to keep up the nice girl attitude for.
Turning to face the determined officer, you smile apologetically, your following answer the same as it always is. “Thanks for the offer again David, but I’m not sure things would work between us.”
“Why? Why do you always say that?” he asks, frustration heavy in his tone, his hand on your car door to stop you from leaving. “Is it because of the MC?”
“No-” You open your mouth to start denying his claims, trying to think of another reason not to go out with a dude that you just don’t find yourself attracted to, when you come up with the perfect solution. “Actually, yes. You’re completely right.”
“Listen, I know you’re close with them, but they’re bad people, (Y/N). You could do so much better.” Here he goes again, you think. Same speech as always. He doesn’t even know SAMCRO like you do, nobody does.
“Thanks for the lecture, David, but Jax asked me to be his girlfriend a couple weeks ago, and I said yes.” The pure horror on his face has you biting your lip to contain your smirk. “See you around.”
Walking into the clubhouse, you scan the room swiftly, not spotting the man you’re hoping to see. “He around, Sack?”
“In the apartments.” he responds, walking into the kitchen with a pair of rubber gloves and a plunger. You grimace, knowing Piney’s probably blocked the bog again. Shaking your head, you walk towards Jax’s residence, knocking on the closed door.
“Room service.” you call sarcastically, your voice sickly sweet. The door opens within a few seconds, Jax’s eyebrow raised, his lips turned up into a grin.
“Lucky me, though you’re slightly overdressed for the kind of ‘room service’ I’m used to.” he says, opening the door to let you in. “Wasn’t expecting to see you till’ later on.”
“I know, but I need to talk to you about a little favour so I thought I’d grace you with my wonderful company.” you tease, plonking yourself down on Jax’s bed. Shutting the door, he sits on a box in front of you, pulling his cigarettes out of his pocket.
“You can just admit you missed me, babe.” He takes a drag, your eyes capturing the way his cheeks hollow as he inhales the smoke, the action stopping your train of thought. “What do you need me for this time, Princess?“
“Are you ever going to drop that nickname? You’ve called it me for years.” He grins cheekily, the smoke parting from his pink lips as he shakes his head at you, knowing deep down you love the endearment. “Anyway-”
A knock on Jax’s door stops you, the two of you turning to see Chibs’. “Sorry to interrupt. Cops are here.”
“Could they be any further up our asses?” Jax spits rhetorically, discarding his cigarette in an ashtray on his cabinet before standing up. You follow him as he leaves the room, Chibs leading the way as the three of you head out to the front. All you’re thinking is please don’t be Hale.
You curse silently as you see the man himself standing against his police car, Jax tensing up as he sets eyes on the deputy. “You’re here so much I’m starting to think you wanna patch in.”
Hale just scowls, his eyes shifting to you as you move from behind Jax, stepping to take position between the Scot and the VP. He watches you for a moment, and you know Jax catches it as you see him look at you questioningly, a pleading look on your face as you hope he just follows your lead.
“We got a call about a guy on a motorcycle running a red light a few blocks from here.” You sigh in disbelief, having a sneaking suspicion that his visit is more out of spite than anything else. “Just here to check your plates.”
“Jesus, how bad did you piss off my dad to go from murders to speeding tickets?” you sass, folding your arms across your chest. Chibs chokes down his chuckle from next to you, taking a drag from his cig to keep down his humour.
“I’m here because it’s my job, (Y/N), to make Charming a safer place for our citizens.” You roll your eyes, nodding slowly. “Something bothering you?”
“Woah, I thought you were here for us, not for the chief’s daughter. Check your plates and you can be on your way.” Jax states protectively, not liking the way Hale is speaking to you. The officer glares in response, his hand moving to rest on the handcuffs on his belt.
“I wonder how the chief would feel if he knew what you were up to with his daughter.” Hale snaps, his whole entity dripping with jealousy. You swallow nervously, trying to hide the anxiety from your face.
Chibs laughs loudly this time, a laugh so loud with amusement that you can’t help but smile. “Jackie, you naughty boy.”
You share a look with your ‘boyfriend’, him smirking, a cocky grin spreading across his face. You let out the breath you’ve been holding in, Jax’s reaction of enjoyment rather than horror making you feel confident in your lie.
“Oh, I get it now. You’ve got a soft spot for my girl here, and you’re pissed she chose me over you.” Jax says, rolling his tongue over his lower lip smugly. “Not that you were even an option.”
“You watch your mouth, Teller.” Hale warns, his eye twitching as he steps up to Jax, the tension heavy between the two men.
“Or what?” Jax challenges, anger radiating off him in waves.
“We got a problem here, boys?” The voice of your dad cuts through the ever brewing argument, him smiling at you loving before turning his attention back to the two amped up males. “Hale, you’re not stationed to be here.“
You, Chibs and Jax watch on as Hale turns into a flushed mess, having no decent excuse for ever coming to TM in the first place - though you all know why he did.
“Thanks, dad.” You hug your father as you speak, him squeezing you tightly before leaving you to it.
“So, something you need to tell me?” Jax asks as you sit on the bench outside, embarrassment crawling up your body. “Wasn’t aware I was taken, darlin’.”
He nudges you playfully, your hands covering your face as you groan. “He’s been pestering me for weeks, figured you were the best deterrent.”
“Thanks.” Jax deadpans, a small smirk on his face as he passes you the cig, you taking a drag as you think about what to say. “Glad I could be of service, I guess.”
“Thanks for going along with it. Guess I owe you one.” You tap off the ash and pass the stick back, biting your lip anxiously. “How about I do you a favor?”
“Sweetheart, no offence but the kind of favours I’d like to have you do for me aren’t exactly innocent.” You cough, his reply completely unexpected, your core tingling involuntarily.
“Try me.” you tease, your gaze flickering to his lips for just a second, your hand coming to rest on his thigh, fingertips inching upwards.
Next thing you know, the two of you are locked at the lips, thankful that the clubhouse is empty, the others off on runs and whatever else. “How long have we got?”
“Half hour, tops.” Jax mumbles, connecting his lips back to yours, his tongue in your mouth eliciting a moan from you. “I don’t see us lasting that long to be honest, darlin’.”
You squeal as you feel yourself being lifted, the pool table becoming your seat as Jax places you on top. You rip at his flannel, the buttons scattering all over the room. Your fingers explore up and down his chiseled chest as he begins to nibble and suck at your neck, your eyes closing in pleasure as he works his way down.
“Please, Jax…” you pant, your underwear positively soaked as his tongue slips over your exposed skin. He practically growls at your pleading, him ripping himself from you as he expertly undoes his jeans, the fabric pooling at his ankles, his boxers joining the denim.
Your eyes widen as his cock stands before you, you pressing your thighs together subconsciously as the ache grows stronger. “Like what you see, Princess?”
“Don’t get too smug, Jackson, gotta see if you can fuck me well enough, first.“ His hands pull at your shorts, you lifting your ass to help assist as he rids the material from your legs. Once he’s discarded the fabric somewhere across the room, he connects his lips back to yours, lifting and squeezing your ass as he moves to you to the edge of the table.
You barely feel him move your underwear to the side before he sinks into you, a gasp leaving your lips as he nuzzles into your neck, his teeth biting at your skin as he fills you up.
You dig your nails into his biceps as he moves out of you, slamming back in deeply. He pulls back, loving the expressions you make as he fucks you so well, the little moans and gasps leaving your lips making him want to explode there and then.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to feel you around me, (Y/N).” You place your hands behind you to steady yourself, your pussy feeling even wetter as he talks to you. “You feel so fucking good, baby.”
“I’m so close, already. Fuck, just like that.” you whine as he hits all the right places, his strokes alternating in speed, but never lacking in power.
You rub your clit, clenching your pussy as you come, your mouth open yet nothing comes out. “That’s it, come for me, baby. Good girl.”
Jax grips the back of your neck as he speeds up his thrusts, his gaze locked on yours as he gets closer and closer to climaxing. You’re practically on fire as you feel another orgasm creeping up on you, the pure hunger in Jax’s eyes making you more sensitive than ever.
“Who knew you could take cock so well.” he whispers as he drills into you, a high pitched moan slipping from your lips. “Imagine if someone walked in right now, saw what a dirty slut you are, so desperate for me.”
His degrading words push you over the edge, a loud curse leaving you as stars fill your vision, Jax continuing to slam into you as he rides you through your high. “You gonna take my come, hm? Gonna let me fill you up like the good girl you are?”
“Yes, fuck, please Jax.” you plead desperately, your nails clawing down his stomach as he places hos forehead against your own, his eyes clenching shut as he let’s go.
He kisses you roughly as he comes inside of you, his hips gently rocking as his hot spurts shoot inside of you, your teeth sucking at his bottom lip.
He pulls out of you slowly, his juices and your own dripping from your satisfied pussy, your body feeling empty without his shaft inside of you.
Jax buckles up his pants, grabbing your shorts before lifting you up as if you weigh nothing. He carries you down the hall, just in time in fact as voices begin to fill the clubhouse.
Reaching his room, he places you down on the bed, his body crawling over yours as he moves a piece of hair from your face. “I’ve gotta go for a vote, but when I get back, we’re gonna see how sexy you look on your hands and knees.”
With that, he’s gone, leaving you shaken and hungry for more.
A/N - It’s been a whileeeeeee since I wrote some smut, but I’m so glad with how this turned out!!!! Hope you guys likeddddddd xxxx
I’m Suzy and I want to share with you something that is a big part of my life and that you are also a big part of it. When I was High School I wasn’t the most popular and didn’t have to many friends. I had braces, glasses, and didn’t know how to dress and teens called me weird. The only reason guys liked me was because of my body and that made me feel so used. I listened to your music a lot and it got me through a lot of hard times. When it came to prom my senior year, I thought I was actually going to get to go because a guy I really liked told me he would take me but in the end he backed out. I was left feeling like I wasn’t pretty enough or worthy of even going. That I would be laughed at if I went by myself. I decided to stay home, I wish I would have had friends to go with but none of them so called “friends” wanted to go with me. I was very unsure of who I was, until a few years ago. I went to your 1989 Tour and I heard your clean speech and the lines that stuck out to me the most of what you said was “You are NOT somebody else’s opinion of you.” and “You ARE your own definition of beautiful and worthwhile.” I knew from that moment, I am who I know I am. That I am beautiful no matter what others say. You gave me hope!! Now I am stronger, more confident, and feel beautiful!! I decided that since this year is my 25th Birthday, I want to have a party that is Prom themed!! That this will be the prom I have always dreamed of, the one I didn’t go to because I was afraid to. But now I am fearless!! I know this is kind of last minute and I know you are a very busy person but I would love to invite you to my 25th Birthday Prom!!! There will be lots of food, music, and dancing!!! A place where I am free to be myself, a place where love will be!!! My Birthday Party will be on Saturday, June 24th, 2017!!! Would you, @taylorswift be my guest of honor at my birthday prom??? It would be a way of thanking you for all you have done for me and to have you at my party celebrating who I am now, it would mean so much to me!! I know it is such short notice but it would mean the world!!! I can’t say how incredible you are and how you have changed my life with your kind and loving words!!! I love you, Tay :)
For as long as I can remember, I’ve hated my body. I had all but given up on being happy with myself. Even with all the changes in my life the past year, I felt as if I’d always be subpar, and considered ugly or unattractive. If you had told me a few years ago, or even a few weeks ago, that I’d feel the confidence I do now, and that I’d want to actually show off something like a new swimsuit, I wouldn’t have believed you.
Somehow, I’ve been lucky enough to surround myself with some of the best friends I could’ve ever imaged, all who have been amazingly supportive, and push me to do things I never thought possible. They are my rocks in life, and I know I’d be no where near as happy as I am today without them.
Never lose hope, and surround yourself with people who care, and everything will be okay ❤️