i experiment with some things :)

'what are words' starter pack

- “how are you?” “Yes.”

- no volume control. Yell or whisper, there is no inbetween

- what was this sentence about again

- clicking/tapping/’umm’ing furiously while trying to focus your mind enough to remember what the sentence was about

- stammering

- worse: spitting by accident

- i’m rambling about myself again how do I stop

- *says someone’s name once* *they don’t hear* “oh well guess that’s the end of that. we had a good run”

- rehearsing any kind of request, compliment, or any planned exchange a trillion times in your head

- writing out said exchange as a form of rehearsal, ums and errs included, so literally nothing is left to chance

- the inevitable sequel: why aren’t they following the script?!?

- the mind-wipe mid-conversation

- focusing so much on paying attention that you don’t actually process what they’re saying

2

kingdom hearts appreciation week
↳day one// favorite outfit

Hey if you live in south west Texas anywhere along the coast and up to San Antonio, Austin, and Houston, check your local weather updates because Hurricane Harvey is supposed to hit us friday night.

Please evacuate if they tell you to. If you dont have to, be sure you have plenty of batteries, water (fill up your bathtubs so you can use the water to flush), ice (for your perishable food if your power goes out), gas if you have a generator, flashlights, and plenty of non-perishables.

I suggest getting a portable charger for your phone and making sure its charged up too.

**Also, pet owners**:
Make sure your pets have tags and you have your vets contact info. A lot of animals get out during storms.

If you think your dog wont be able to go to the bathroom outside, I suggest buying Puppy Potty Training Pads.That way they can to the the bathroom inside but its on a nice litte sheet that you can just toss.

If you are able to take your dogs out, i suggest taking them out on a leash or checking your fence first. Sometimes storms can knock down a fence without you knowing, so be careful if you’re used to just letting your dog out in the back yard.

Finally:
• stay away from windows
• stay inside
• keep updated
• NEVER run your generator inside
• watch out for flooding, if the waterlooks too deep or you’re not sure, dont drive through it. Turn around.
• be safe

If you’re like me and you live in an apartment and this is your first hurricane you have to deal with by yourself feel free to message me if you wanna talk. I’m from Houston so I have some experience with these things lol

some of the things i've been told since coming out as asexual in 2015

-“you’re too pretty to be asexual”
-“you just haven’t met the right guy yet”
-“you’ll change your mind once you’re in a relationship”
-“if you ever get in a ‘relationship’ your partner will just cheat on you so he can have sex”
-“is there something wrong with you?”
-“it’s just a hormonal thing. doctors can help you fix that”
-“so… you’re gay?”
-“here’s the name of my doctor you should see him about your homone levels”
-“that’s not a real thing”
-“there must be something wrong with you”
-“you’re probably gay but too scared to tell anyone”
-“i can fix that ;)”
-“i called my pastor and he said he’s going to put you on the prayer chain”
-“the bible doesn’t necessarily say that asexuality is wrong, but it’s wrong because it’s an identity thing. you should just identify as a child of God, regardless of whether or not you actually get these feelings”
-“you’re basically just straight”
-“so you’re just gonna be alone forever?”
-“so you’ve never loved anyone?”
-“ohmygosh is this because of your past trauma?!”
-“i’m so sorry, this must be because of all you’ve been through”
-“you don’t look asexual”
-“so you probably masturbate a lot then…”
-“asexuals aren’t part of the lgbtqia community… the A stands for 'ally’. stop pretending like asexuals are descriminated against”
-“isn’t that a plant thing?”

(feel free to add some of your own experiences)

AIKO | 

※Permission was granted by the artist to upload their works.  

3

–it’s called Success;; look into it!

2

learning to grieve

anonymous asked:

I really love your blog! Could you do Shinee as college students or their study habits?

hi anon! i love YOU

onew: 

  • everyone automatically assumed he was an upperclassman even as a freshman 
  • looks serious and pensive when he wears his glasses, still a dork tho
  • always in sweats bc he likes to be comfy 
  • never has meals??? someone pls swipe him 
  • never on campus bc naptime 
  • can catch him in the library tho he’s that kid trying to unwrap and eat a granola bar in the quiet part of the lib 
  • he would be embarrassed but otherwise his stomach will make whale mating calls and a crinkling wrapper is the lesser evil by far 

jonghyun: 

  • sick of hearing “working at starbucks” jokes bc he’s liberal arts
  • actually is part-time barista at starbucks on campus tho
  • always has at least two essays to write at all times but always chilling until deadlines 
  • around finals: “can you snort coffee”
  • so sleep deprived that he is on another plane of existence (”i can hear my heartbeat and i don’t think that’s something that should be happening”)
  • wears sunglasses everywhere and people think it’s because he’s just constantly hungover but no sometimes he just closes his eyes to nap for a few secs without anyone noticing 
  • go to every single event where they bring puppies to campus for stress relief 

key:

  • has a blanket and does work/read outside when the weather’s warm 
  • will turn down going out to finish homework….. and actually do homework
  • but also bingewatches netflix like it’s his job 
  • does not realize that sometimes he looks at the prof too intensely and like won’t blink??? for a really long time and they are sweating 
  • always featured in the uni brochure looking fly as hell (he keeps all of them and posts them on his wall but in an aesthetic way)
  • meticulous color coded notes!!! is he a person or a typewriter 
  • sticks out his tongue when he’s concentrating on studying 

minho: 

  • is always wearing some kind of school merch srsly the bookstore gets most of their money from choi sales 
  • also has a lot of other university merch bc he traded with friends 
  • a campus tour guide 
  • he knows all the history behind the buildings and when they were built and just wants the incoming students to feel welcome 
  • there is a GIANT blown up picture of him in the welcome center of him screaming at one of the football games 
  • he’s very proud of it and has taken a pic in front of it imitating himself (it’s his pro pic he’s never going to change it) 

taemin: 

  • always looks a little harassed bc he is once again late it’s just who he is as a person
  • can never remember where his classes are and it’s the end of the semester omg 
  • his phone background is his schedule 
  • eats an obscene amount in dining halls 
  • never raises his hand but when the prof calls on him bc they don’t think he’s paying attention he has really profound answers
  • when he was a frosh he had a legit map bc he was trying to find his building and a senior actually stopped and asked him if he was lost and helped him like he looked that helpless and sometimes he flashbacks to that moment randomly and it’ll probably haunt him for the rest of his life

since a lot of people are requesting college AUs i’m thinking of maybe doing a more extended version for each member later on! 

god apparently we need to get some things straight about this Rose Christo business, because the way that certain parts of tumblr respond to things like this is really poor.

“take what is posted on kiwifarms with a grain of salt” is a good, healthy practice that allows you to verify information.

“everything that is posted on kiwifarms is automatically false/made up/a lie by virtue of being posted on kiwifarms” is stupid as hell.

i don’t like kiwifarms, and i don’t think that should come as a surprise to anybody, but that doesn’t make everybody who posts on KF is wrong about everything. the fact that her brother posted information, which Rose then presumably read and posted about on her (public!) twitter, makes it very likely that he’s telling the truth about this situation.

the world is not divided into “people whose morals align with mine” and “evil, hatemongering liars who never tell the truth.” stop playing into cushy lies that make you feel good inside. stop enabling people’s sob stories in some fucked up attempt to increase the diversity of your world view. stop insisting that truth is in the hands of the person who claims victim status the fastest.

Rose Christo, whatever her intentions or beliefs, is operating on a fact of certain tumblr circles. that fact is that social capital is awarded to people based on aspects of their identities or experiences–people of color, LGBT people, abuse survivors, et cetera are given more of a platform and are more celebrated than others. there are some legitimate reasons for this, but the way that it folds out in these circles often leads to a couple of things:

1. people faking their identities for an extra boost/personal attention/gain of that social capital;
2. people insisting that anybody who claims these identities must be telling the truth, because otherwise you’re upsetting the status quo of giving them an elevated status.

if you say that Rose Christo fabricated any part of her story, then you’re accused a lesbian of color who survived child abuse and the foster care system of lying. that leads to backlash on anyone who doubts the story, whether they’re on tumblr or on kiwifarms. people KNOW this when they claim oppressed identities that they don’t actually have.

(for the record, i’m not saying that all of her story was fabricated. i’m not saying that she never went through abuse, that she isn’t a lesbian, etc. i’m saying that all of these things together, with whichever parts are lies, are protective against criticisms and accusations.)

and if those accusations are specifically coming from somebody from kiwifarms–well, you can just breathe a sigh of relief now. surely somebody from KF is maliciously making up lies. they say “autistic” as an insult and they bully people, so why would any individual member of the forum /ever/ be telling the truth? Rose’s morals are better than [Rose’s brother]’s morals, so we have a clear winner here! no need to delve deeper into the story in any sense, because we can just let social capital via X Identity solve it for us.

like…no. that’s not how this works, that’s not how any of this works. care more about the pursuit of truth than about picking apart the membership of anyone involved. look at how each person is respectively acting, look at who is providing evidence.

this is getting rambly. also, please don’t come whining to me about defending KF. i do not give a shit about KF. i give a shit about what’s being said there, but i’d care just as much if it was posted on facebook or here or something. this performative “wellllll he’s from kf so hooooow could this be truuuuue?” bullshit is just annoying to me either way.

Facet

Added a new thing for Redbubble.

look, you can call out specific ace folks who post horrible homophobic shit without acting as if it’s indicative of the entire ace community okay?? and without using those examples as proof that asexuals inherently do not belong in the lgbtqiap+ community??? like you don’t need to actively seek out instances of ace people saying fucked up shit and compile whole tags on your blog for those instances and make those tags shit like “#ace disgrace.” you especially don’t need to take posts that are in no way hurting us–posts reminding ace people that they’re not broken, posts hoping for education on ace identity so that people don’t have to spend their lives thinking there’s something wrong with them, etc–and make mean comments on them. i’ve seen all of that multiple times from people i consider friends, and it makes me feel sick in every part of my being. 

i’m a lesbian. i don’t think i’m ace, although i’ve definitely had to spend a lot of time questioning it because i have some serious issues related to past trauma that have yet to be resolved. but you know what? i remember being maybe thirteen, and happening across an article in one of my mum’s magazines about asexuality, and every person interviewed talked about the pain of not knowing there was a word for them, that there were others like them. they were mostly women and many of them talked about forcing themselves to have sex for years with men and not wanting it and feeling wrong and broken for not having the desires expected of them by this society. and i could relate so strongly to that feeling that i started fucking crying. to this day compulsory heterosexuality has me so fucked up i still find myself imagining a future in which i marry a man, because that was what i learned from every facet of the world from birth. i hate the idea; i hate the part of me that still expects to be straight, to be “normal” but it’s there, and it’s put me in a lot of really awful, upsetting situations with men where my comfort was ignored and my boundaries violated and i sat silent and let it happen. so even as a very young teen just coming to terms with my orientation, i felt so strongly for these women, most of whom would define themselves as romantically straight: their experience of the world may be in a lot of ways easier than mine but i felt the shared pain, the commonality between us sharply.

i’m a lesbian. i’m a black-mixed woman. i’m neurodivergent. this summer at a pride protest in my community one of the speakers, a woman I look up to immensely, addressed the multiple axes of her identity, from her disability to her blackness to her queerness. and one thing she said was “i came out twice: once at 14 and once at 47.” she came out as a lesbian at 14 and as ace at 47. she talked about being proudly and loudly lesbian for decades, but always feeling like something was missing, like something wasn’t right, and not having the words or knowledge base to understand what it was. she talked about asking her doctor if there was some kind of medicine she could take to “fix” her asexuality, and how her doctor said “why would you want to do that? are you unhappy? is it causing you pain?” and she talked about how, after decades of discomfort, she was able to fully come into herself by learning about and embracing her asexuality as well as her lesbian identity. both were important to her: both needed to be spoken proudly. 

one of my friends said that asexuality wasn’t like lgbp+ orientations because it was “making private information about your sex life everyone’s business” whereas being lesbian or pan isn’t necessarily about sex. he said that it shouldn’t be talked about except with partners, that people shouldn’t be coming out as ace the way they come out as trans or queer. but i think that’s just…so untrue, and so hurtful and dismissive to all the people for whom the term “asexual” was like coming home, like a light turning on, like comfort and understanding. i’ve also heard people say that asexuality is not inherently part of the community, often under the assertion that their struggle is not comparable. but then why am I as a cis woman considered a community member, despite the immense privilege I hold over trans people, and trans women in particular? it would be just as easy to take posts from all the horrible terfs on this site who happen to be lesbians and use them as proof that lesbians don’t belong in the community, so why isn’t that a common practice? what kind of logic is it to say that because a heteroromantic ace doesn’t face homophobia, they have no right to talk about their particular experiences with compulsory sexuality and erasure? you don’t have to be The Most Oppressed to talk about your particular experiences, as long as you aren’t erasing or dismissing those of people whose marginality is not yours. i can talk about my struggles with compulsory heteronormativity and with lesbophobia, and that doesn’t mean I think that trans lesbians somehow magically have it easier than me. it is harder in this world to be a trans lesbian than a cis lesbian, and that still doesn’t mean my particular struggles are invalid. 

like god, call out ace people who are perpetuating homophobia, because you should call out anyone who is perpetuating homophobia. but don’t deliberately construct a narrative that says they are homophobic because they are ace. don’t tell them that talking about their experiences and identity is inappropriate. don’t create a dichotomy in which only the lesbian or bi or gay or pan or queer part of a wlw or mlm ace is relevant and significant, especially if they explicitly consider both to be integral and interconnected. so what if you see the barriers ace people face as comparatively small? if “all” a community needs to stop being marginalized is increased awareness from the general public, that should be something to strive for and something to celebrate, because it means that with a little effort we could create a world in which no ace person has to spend years feeling broken. because as someone who used to cry every night and had a whole plan to kill myself if i wasn’t straight by the time i was 20, i know what it feels like to think you are broken and wrong for something innate and precious, and i don’t want anyone else to ever feel that.