i envy that girl


The level of questioning I was under, coming at such young age. People asking me, “What do you think of this? Who are you, who are you, who are you?” I felt so inadequate because I just didn’t have answers yet. I had so many friends who had a clear sense of self. Who knew that they liked certain things, like the smell of grass, or what their favorite color was. I envied those girls because I was so unsure of myself. I questioned everything. I was terrified by the level of interest in me. I spent most of my time trying to convince everyone I was incredibly boring because I needed privacy and a minute to figure myself out. — Happy 27th Birthday Emma Charlotte Duerre Watson! (April 15, 1990)

Deadly Sins- Envy

Originally posted by tomhollanderr

Relationship: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: Reader’s jealous ex who despises Peter Parker for dating the Reader follows them after school. A turn of events happens when Peter’s girlfriend life is on the line.

Warnings: Swearing cause I love swearing IRL.Angst?

Word Count: 2,000

*A/N: I’m transitioning from Wattpad so this is how I type my fics.. Hope you guy’s like my writing style. I know most people do [Y/N] but I normally don’t but in the future I’ll try it :,) Pls don’t roast me /.\ I also tried making it long, sorry if it’s too long 0.0 Like I said I’m used to writing longer stuff..

One of the worst sins to have is Pride. Yet the most dangerous ones come from our inner turmoils. Envy can lead towards many other feelings causing you to do something you’ll regret. Jealousy causes you to feel like your body is on fire and you have to act immediately to set out the fire. Sometimes we can never settle the fire inside of us..

The fire was raging in Quarterback Mason Larson. It’s been ablaze since he had just been broken up with for low life Peter Parker. His girlfriend of two months ended it with him to be with that nerd. She claimed that Mason was too jealous for her liking. He was going to find out why she liked this Parker kid so much…

[Reader’s POV]

“You look different…. dating Penis Parker definitely has changed you” Mason seethes gripping on your wrist. You had one of Peter’s science shirts on cause it was like you had a piece of him whenever he’s away.

“Let go of me Mason,move on with your life!” you shout in protest trying to get your hand back. You just wanted to wait for Peter after school like a normal girlfriend. Yet you get bothered by your Envy filled Ex-Boyfrined.

“You’re my girl so no I won’t let you go” His voice raising causing people’s heads to turn. Great this jackass was going to cause a scene..

“Hey baby, there you are!” Peter’s voice catches your attention. Your eyes flicking in his direction. His eyes glance at your hand twitching in Mason’s tight grasp.

“Sorry I’m late, had to finish up with the group over the topics for the next competition” Peter swiftly twists Mason’s wrist and kicking his feet from under him. You let out a yelp when Mason’s nails scratch you. Peter immediately  catches you before you fall backwards on the ground.

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“The level of questioning I was under, coming at such young age. People asking me, “What do you think of this? Who are you, who are you, who are you?” I felt so inadequate because I just didn’t have answers yet. I had so many friends who had a clear sense of self. Who knew that they liked certain things, like the smell of grass, or what their favorite color was. I envied those girls because I was so unsure of myself. I questioned everything. I was terrified by the level of interest in me. I spent most of my time trying to convince everyone I was incredibly boring because I needed privacy and a minute to figure myself out.”


The level of questioning I was under, coming at such young age. People asking me, “What do you think of this? Who are you, who are you, who are you?” I felt so inadequate because I just didn’t have answers yet. I had so many friends who had a clear sense of self. Who knew that they liked certain things, like the smell of grass, or what their favorite color was. I envied those girls because I was so unsure of myself. I questioned everything. I was terrified by the level of interest in me. I spent most of my time trying to convince everyone I was incredibly boring because I needed privacy and a minute to figure myself out.

The Sugar Gods Blessed Me. My Cinderella Story in Seattle

I’m still in complete awe from the day trip I took in Seattle. I met a guy on SA who flew me out for a same day trip to meet him (meaning I flew there and back in the same day** sorry I realized that needed clarification. lol I talked to him for a while before he flew me out) have dinner with him. While texting him I told him about my recent endeavors with my last guy who screwed me over so bad my head could spin. He couldn’t believe the story and was set on a mission to treat me like a Queen that I am. 

He picked me up in a BMW and he immediately said, "I’m taking you to your first surprise.”  We went to down town Seattle and he dropped me off right at Sephora. “I want you to go shopping, get whatever you want and go crazy.”

I couldn’t believe the words that came out of his mouth. I was only in Seattle  for about 4 hours before I had to be back on the plane so I had to hurry. I grabbed the first Sephora associate to help me and within 5 minutes I had everything I needed. $600 worth of makeup. 

We then returned to his BEAUTIFUL Victorian style home that he designed and was still in the process of remodeling. He’s VERY meticulous and articulate in his speech. I tried to be as eloquent and sophisticated as I could be which he truly loved about me.  He tuned to look at me and said, “"Now for your second suprise” 

He took me into his spare bedroom which had dress and shoes boxes laid out before us. When he doesn’t have a girlfriend, he buys things to prepare for the next girl. I couldn’t believe I was trying on $500-$2200 dresses with Louboutin shoes! He has impeccable taste! I could have one dress per visit so Inlet him pick out the one for me that he thought looked best. 

We went to dinner at The Lark. Oh my Sugar god, the food was AMAZING. The restaurants in Arizona can kiss ass compared to this place. 

Sadly, dinner ended and we were on our way back to the airport. I purposefully left the dress he gave me in the car. I couldn’t take it. During dinner he mentioned something that would be a deal breaker for him in which I couldn’t change thus knowing I wouldn’t see him again after tonight. :( After I got through security I texted him saying that I wouldn’t be seeing him again and why, that it would be wrong for me to take a $2200 dress with me. He respected how honest I was and insisted that he send me the dress anyways because he truly wanted to go forward with me even if we couldn’t anymore. 

Regardless this man is EXACTLY how I wish every Sugar Daddy would be. He was nearly perfect. Every one of his girls lasted years and I believe it. I’ve never been treated so well in my life. I envy the girl that captures his heart… aka wallet. Lol but I hope she treats him well. 

13 Going on 30 (Part 1)

Summary: When your 13th birthday party goes awry, and you make a life changing wish - you wake up to discover you’ve flash forwarded 17 years ahead. 

Word Count: 2,186. 

A/N: This new series is entirely based off of the film, “13 Going on 30.” I figured it’s about damn time someone makes that movie into a Bucky series and here we are now. Hope you guys enjoy, and feedback would be well appreciated! :D

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on the left is a victoria secret model, and on the right is me. there was a time, i would have put these pictures side by side, and used it as a “goal” to get to. i actually went into a victoria secret shop once, about a year ago, with my friend, and whilst she was trying something on in the changing room, and i was waiting, i was trying to hold back the tears, they just started running down my face, and i was desperately wiping them away before anyone saw. it was all too much in there, all them what i deemed as “perfect” girls plastered all over the walls, and my mind was racing with “why don’t i look like them” “why can’t i achieve that” “i’ll never be like them” and looking back, i feel so saddened that i ever felt like that. (my friend didn’t know, so it obviously wasn’t her fault that it happened, she was just shopping in there, bless her❤️) but now, today, i don’t envy those girls, NOT ONE LITTLE BIT. i’ve read up about their diets, and some days they have detoxing where they literally eat just vegetables, and like hours before the show they aren’t allowed liquid, like hello?? we need to drink?? it’s just crazy. it’s their choice and i completely understand that, but i’m just saying that there was a time i would have admired how strict they are with themselves, but today is so different. i want to enjoy food, i’ve rid my life of diets, i’ve found self love, and i want to eat cake and ice cream, when i want cake and ice cream, like chocolate?? who doesn’t love chocolate?? i just don’t envy their bodies or their lifestyles anymore, and that’s just a GLO UP for me. YOU DONT NEED TO LOOK LIKE THOSE GIRLS. YOU NEED TO LOOK LIKE YOU. YOU YOU YOU. whatever body shape, or size you are, that’s perfect, and that’s what makes you YOU.

not a Calvin Klein ad lol 😝😝😝

(hope this isn’t triggering💗)

Did u know. it took me 7 solid years (not counting this one) to come up with a consistent concept for my take on the 7 deadly sins???

But yeah here they are and they’re all essentially demonic magical girls. (Though not all are girls)*

*he/him for Avery and they/them for Quinn


I saw a post earlier saying that the audience didn’t cheer for Kyla during the comeback stage for M Countdown. I watched the video and it’s true from what I can tell. You can faintly hear the audience in the background and when every member had their part and sung their lines, people would cheer. However, when Kyla came up to do her part, it was silent… No background noise from the audience. This has made most people come to the conclusion that some still find her “weight” a problem. Because earlier this year, K-Netizens (and some international netizens) were saying that she was fat, chubby, overweight, etc. And now with this comeback, it seems to be the case again.

I’m honestly disgusted, Kyla is a 15 year old girl. Being an idol is probably hard enough on her, she has to balance many thing in her life which is stress inducing. The last thing she needs is “fans” fat-shaming her. She’s not even fat, I don’t even consider her chubby. Her thighs are thick… ANDDD? Automatically that’s unhealthy??

Look at these comments on their M Countdown stage performance:

I can not believe- I hope these commenters see this and know that they are disrespectful pieces of shit!! This is a young girl, and your shamming her body because it isn’t “ideal” to YOU. Like that one asshole said^ “it’s none of our business”, yet you still said all those hurtful things…

Look.. I’m no doctor, but I’m about 99.99999% sure that Kyla is healthy. None of us know her weight, we’re all just basing it off of what we see. And I know for a fact that none of you are doctors either soo, why are you stating that she’s not eating healthy? You don’t know what the fuck she’s eating, and you can not tell whether or not she’s eating healthy just because her “stomach is quite big” TO YOU. Again, I know, these are just people’s opinions. But this can be damaging, especially to a teenage girl. SHE’S the one who has to see all this bullshit said about her.

I really hope that she doesn’t develop an eating disorder, and Pristin seem to be one of those few kpop groups who aren’t put on strict diets. And I fear that it’ll change because of all of this… I really hope that the other girls in the group help Kyla through this and stand strongly by her side. After all, she is the youngest…


FYI, I think Kyla is very pretty, she looks perfectly healthy and growing just fine for her age.

Everyday you wake

The reasons for my respect
Are set in my lip of gold.
And the time to its kiss
And among the spheres the noble one
The elder covered with gleaming window.
Brings all the wipes phenomena,
To the verdure color of the emerald movie.
A grape recovering will conduct
The tear stained wind of a planet.
You, who is like a jackal pheasant among the developing of many pioneer.
In the sordid acrobat, many careless holes,
Of your dark horse when you hold out your eyeballs.
I want you to rescue on my hand,
You are the pale woman of a pheasant,
The neonness of the guitar, the power of the jungle.
The delicate current gave it pride.
A salt trusting will begin
The brutal ice of a planet.
A current of gleaming pasture
That does not know why it flows and trusts

In the smallest fused quartz branch
Silvery abys of receptacle,
Deep brown seams above a negligent film.
You pulse headlong into a archipeligos to respond your business.
Built and then blushed in the chimney.
The round son
Perfumes in the blazing morning.
The sky myriad belts are deluded.
The dove knows this,
That life in it’s copper boxes is as endless as the warmth.
Because i love you, love, in the clay and among the electricity

He is under us at this moment of first loving.
Went expanded in praise.
Pockets of aluminum converted into gold,
I saw how goblets are rose
By the absent minded path.
Of verdure wine, spirit
Of the prizes,
Passed woman blood, your kisses
Relinquish into exile
And a droplet of fused quartz, with remnants of the sea.
Stand on the clandenstines that wait for you
Undulate the smothered chairs, bristle the doors|i salute your cordial cheesecake
And envy your honest pride
Wine, Meddling, and Temptation

Pairing: Dean x Reader 

Word Count: 1,703

Warnings: None, just a little bit of language, implied smut, fluff

AN: I wrote this for @whispersandwhiskerburn‘s challenge Much Ado about SPN. I hope you like it, I’m trying to get back into the rhythm of writing! Congrats again on 1.5k followers, love! Quote is in bold along with the first use of all 3 of the J’s!

Originally posted by weeklyspn

Originally posted by canonspngifs

Jody Mills has been one of your best friends for years. You met her through Bobby years ago while you were helping him out with some research for the Winchesters. Truth be told, you weren’t fond of her right out of the gate. She was nice enough; understanding towards the town and made sure everything was right in the world, but you didn’t like how she assumed Bobby was the town’s crazy drunk. You were always protective of Bobby, just as he was with you. Once she had learned the truth though, you got along like two peas in a pod.

Thankfully you still got to see her often even though your job tended to take you all over the place. Hunting never stopped because evil never sleeps. Anytime you got the chance though, you ended up on her doorstep to catch up over a bottle of wine and some pizza. This happened to be your current predicament, slightly buzzed and laughter ringing throughout the house as you both traded stories.

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A/N: This is a little drabble that I wrote for the Sinfully Romione fest on Tumblr (hosted by the AMAZING @coyotelaughingsoftly​). It won the Envy category. Special shoutout to @callieskye​ for the beta and all my group chat lovelies for just being awesome and never having enough pining (in or out of the pines) Side note: this little drabble was inspired by a true incident involving my high school bff and his coming over to my college dorm and drinking hot chocolate…I may have obsessed over the mug once he left…I was 18, give me a break!

You can also find it here on  FF.net

Can’t bloody take it. Gonna lose my mind. It was bad enough before, at Hogwarts, being so close, but now? In this tent? There’s nowhere to fucking run, nowhere to fucking hide.
She’s everywhere. Her scent, I can almost taste it. It’s on the towels in the loo, in the sofa cushions where she spends hours reading that damned book.
She brushes against me when we pass each other in the kitchen. She sits a little too close to me at the table. I love it…I hate how much I love it.
I can hear her breathing as she sleeps. She’s right fucking there, so close, too close, but painfully far away. I feel like a kid looking at the stars, thinking they must be just inches apart…but really, they’re not even in the same ruddy galaxy.
She brings me a mug of tea, our knees touch as she sits down on the ground beside me. She’s making small talk and smiling at me, Merlin that smile. Does she know? Does she have a clue what it does to me? I almost spill it all, right then and there, my guts, not the tea.
Then she’s pressing her perfect lips to the edge of the mug and I get a tiny glimpse of her tongue on the edge of the rim, and I know I have to look like a giant drooling troll, but I can’t stop myself. I’ve been jealous of right many people in my life, but now I’ve gone ‘round the bend, completely crackers, 'cause the thing I wanna be more than anything in the whole blinking universe right now is that mug. Then she would be holding me against her chest, using me to keep her warm.
Merlin, could I keep her warm! All she’d have to do is crawl into my bunk. Plenty warm there. Trust me. I wake up damn near every time in sweaty tangled mess.
Now she’s finished so I offer to help her clean up. Mistake. Warm soapy water. She’s wash, I’m dry. Her fingers skim across the cup while she cleans it. Wish she’d rub me like that. Her hands are so slick with the soap that she almost drops it when she tries to rinse it; we fumble to catch it, my hands wrap around hers. We laugh. Relieved. Close call. So close. Too close. Drying that bloody mug, all I can think about is my hands are right where her mouth was. Yep, I’ve lost it. Scariest part? I don’t even wanna find it.

anonymous asked:

i just want you to know i was born male and i feel the opposite way in your comic. i never felt men were superior due to this teaching. i always felt the opposite. that because of my gender, i was inferior. women could like whatever they wanted, but men were restricted and controlled. women were allowed freedom of expression. men were forced to dressed like a utility. a tool. expression gets in the way of work, and work is all men are for. i never thought men were superior. only the opposite.

Well, my comic wasn’t talking about the whole spectrum of sexism and how it affects everyone and those repercussions. That would be near impossible! It was simply a narrative from my childhood about how having boys turn away from girl characters can indirectly lead to men becoming sexist and seeing women as “lesser” as they grow up.

There is an array of perspectives on how one can interpret sexist teachings how they affect everyone differently. A persons perspective is also dependent on their gender/race/sexuality/upbringing/personality, etc

As a kid I believed girls were better than boys because I was raised by mostly women and had an aggressive and sometimes cruel older brother. I found boys to be mean, harsh and insensitive growing up. I envied girls being able to play with pretty dolls, while I was subjected to playing with ugly action figures. At the same time there was a little girl out there who envied my action figures and hated her dolls. I was jealous of girls being allowed to cry, hold hands with eachother, hug. But at the same time there were girls out there who didn’t want to be subjected to these things. I also knew that because I was being raised as a boy that I had to suck up my emotions. I was less likely to reach out for help when I was depressed or suicidal to this day. While at the same time girls are allowed to be emotional as kids they are constantly given crap for being “too emotional” when they get older.

We’re all trapped in a hellscape of stereotype and emotions! :)

Dean’s New Nickname.

Originally posted by dean---winchester---imagines

Originally posted by freak-of-evolution

A/N: So if you follow my main blog, you can see that I am a huge slut for Harley Quinn, both animated and movie version. I love both Harley Quinn and SPN a lot so I wanted to do a little fic where the reader dresses up as club Harley when on a case with the boys. Hope you guys enjoy and I may do something with this if I get a good response towards it! ;) 

Warnings:None, except for a daddy kink. 

Words: 1,075

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anonymous asked:

okay what are your favorite edward moments from the books?

  • Edward and the lemonade bottle cap
  • Any reaction to people’s thoughts
  • “Stop it mom, you’re making me blush.”
  • “Do I … dazzle you?” Because he deadass didn’t know and thought it just for some reason did not work on Bella and his heart “swelled” when he found out he did dazzle her
  • any Mike Newton slander
  • his and Alice’s “both freaks” alliance. Like the time in Midnight Sun where Edward had to pretend Alice was telling the truth when she told Jasper he wasn’t going to do anything meanwhile Jasper was literally visualizing sucking the life out of this one student. “We had to stick together, Alice and I. It wasn’t easy, hearing voices or seeing visions of the future. Both freaks among those who were already freaks. We protected each other’s secrets.”
  • His and Alice’s siblingship in general. Seriously like any time one looked out for the other.
  • Every Boo Boo The Fool moment he had during Midnight Sun when he felt emotions and was like ??? what??? what is this??? am i.. FEELING??? is this… ENVY??/ ALL OVER… A HUMAN ???A HUMAN GIRL? SHE’S JUST A GIRL
  • “Love her too?” I whispered, incredulous.
  • His what is she thinking now? and now? now what? now what’s she thinking?  little kid “are we there yet” kind of questions
  • I saw her life as I had before-college, career…love, marriage. I saw her on her father’s arm again, dressed in gauzy white, her face flushed with happiness as she moved to the sound of Wagner’s march. The pain was more than anything I’d felt before.
  • Could a dead, frozen heart break? It felt like mine would….. She was dreaming of me……Could a dead, frozen heart beat again? It felt like mine was about to.
  • Oh, and also, I’m wretchedly in love with you.
  • how generally nervous he was around her not just the fact that he thirsted for her but the fact that he didn’t know what he was doing bc…like i said….he has no idea what the fuck feelings are
  • Blood Type
  • How long have you been seventeen? A while. (FUCKING KING OF COMEDY)
  • “It doesn’t Matter? / does it MATTER?” etc. basically the entire freak out and his mental debate of whether she was mentally sound and how he could probably arrange for Carlisle to set her up with the best medical care
  • “We match!”
  • “isn’t it supposed to be like this? the glory of first love and all that?” :D
  • Edward cooking for Bella on prom day and using Charlie as his taste tester.
  • I guess it wasn’t a favorite moment but it was ??? cute?? his stupid little tantrum about how if Bella was at Mike’s place on her birthday the worse thing that would happen was them not finding a bandage
  • Edward anonymously setting up a scholarship for Bella
  • DUDE HE’S SO FUCKGIN CHEESY….. Before you bella…my life was like a moonless night
  • “Amazing! Carlisle was right!” what a nerd
  • Edward breaking a tv set then storming back in the room and roaring nO NO when bella’s dumbass said “Okay alice where do you want to do this?
  • “Isabella Marie Swan,” he whispered, the strangest expression crossing his face. He almost looked mad. “Do you believe that I asked the Volturi to kill me because I felt guilty?”
  • Edward trying to convince Bella he was lying about not loving her
  • “I just proposed to you and you think it’s a joke.”
  • He and Bella winning an Oscar for their acting performance in their “I got accepted there too” bit in front of Charlie
  • Edward coming up with an entire blockbuster movie plot where he and Bella would be the luckiest plane crash survivors in history while they’re taking notes
  • No Bella you look…sexy
  • “Did you run over someone’s cat?”
  • How he could quite literally kill Jacob when his stupid ass told her he’d rather she was dead
  • Another thing…I’ll be fighting for her too. I’m a quick learner Jacob I don’t make the same mistake twice and I’m here until she orders me away
  • That sounds about right…pup
  • I prefer brunettes!
  • The “You’ll always be my Bella” speech
  • The entire proposal…………he is so cute…..i wanna cry he was so happy
  • The way he got his feelings hurt when Bella didn’t want to put the ring on and how happy his little face got when he saw the ring on her…… i’m crying
  • he told her to be nice before he proposed
  • Edward really took a crying bella who pulled over on the side of the road crying into his arms and held her the entire night while she cried over Jacob Black can i fucking die. Can i fucking die right nOW.
  • Just how honest he was in that tent scene tbh. I would die for him idk if you know that yet but in case you didn’t.
  • This is probably just a me thing but any time he gets protective over Bella or his family etc it’s so hot laksjdlakjdas i’m SO SORRY
  • The telling Charlie about their engagement he was so chillin.
    Bella: stressing pulling her hair leg shaking at 100mph 
    Edward: :D charlie :D i know i should’ve told you but …. i proposed! :D
  • Edward in general wanting to give Bella the world is so cute like he would buy anything for her but the fucking cARs… i hate him. No i don’t. He’s just so cute he’s so excited and willing to do anything for her.
  • “By the way, I love you” “That’s why we’re here”
  • Taking Bella’s garter off with his teeth winking at Bella then throwing it at Mike Newton’s face
  • Edward’s entire reaction every time Jacob had any thoughts. Like the time Jacob was like they’re probably all fighting not to rip away the cup from bella’s hands and edward rolled his eyes. Or Jacob would be like “he owes me” and edward would mouth “I do.” Or jacob would fall into this self-pity i need love mood and edward tossed him his keys and told him to get out
  • Edward’s absolute love and pure JOY when he hears Renesmee’s thoughts for the first time
  • After the birth Edward ordering Jacob away after he clearly gave up and was over it and Edward refusing to give up on Bella
  • EDWARD’S LITERAL DISAPPOINTMENT WHEN HE COULDN’T HEAR BELLA’S THOUGHTS WHEN SHE “WOKE UP” poor baby he actually thought. what kind of boo boo the fool. 
  • Vampire Bella:                               
    Edward: oh my god. Incredible. You’re amazing. (what  a NERD)
  • Edward’s happy little voice every time he talked about Renesmee
  • “No I don’t care if you bite Jacob”
  • Just his overall protectiveness for his family. I’ve already talked about this but!!!!!!!!!
  • Him defending Alice always whether it be to Sam or wanting to rip Demitri to shreds specifically for her
  • Edward giving Renesmee a fucking ipod
  • “Caius you idiot the sun is out how are these children of the damn MOON”-an actual quote by Edward Anthony Masen Cullen
  • HE WAS SO EXCITED TO GET INTO BELLA’S MIND MY LITTLE BABY IT’S ALL HE’S WANTED IT WAS LIKE A FUCKING BIRTHDAY PRESENT OR SOMETHING. I feel like on his birthdays Bella is just like ok. For your present you’ll get my mind I’ll lift my shield today. He was just so excited so happy he told her to do it again
  • Edward loves. A lot. He loves so much oh my god. I wanna die.

maybe i should’ve just linked you to the edward cullen quotes good reads page. or like your nearest barnes and noble and the YA section where you can find the entire series because I can assure you everything he’s ever done is so cherished in my world. i’d die for him idk if you’ve picked up on that