i dreamed my life would be

I still remember the day I decided to become a LOVE… and that was 6 years ago when I first listened to their song ‘Face’. My babies were really popular back then, but as time did pass by, you could tell it slowed down every single day. Back then, I came to an point where I couldn’t hear anything from JR, Aron, Baekho, Minhyun and Ren. It would take a long time for me to figure out what their schedules were or I just faced the reality of them not having any schedules at all. I still do remember that when NU’EST was in Japan I didn’t hear anything from them for such a long time… Everyday I would look at the internet but each day I got the same results which was none, nothing… not even a single picture. I always had to listen to fans from other fandoms asking me who I liked, and when I said NU’EST I would always get the SAME respond which was ‘who are they?’. I cannot tell how sad I was multiple times, but yet I was so happy that I had them in my life and I knew that I would never change them for anyone or anything. I can’t believe that 5,5 years went by so quickly and before I even knew it, today the 19th of October did approach and we did write down history. Our babies long awaited dream is finally fulfilled and I can’t find the words to explain how happy and how proud I am. Aron, JR, Ren & Baekho, thank you for never giving up and congratulations on your first win I AM SO PROUD and even if Minhyun isn’t with you right now we all know his heart. Once again, congratulations babies THANK YOU for making this day happen. 

symphonysonata  asked:

Okay, I heard someone say Burgerpants and I came running. My man. My main man. Face of the customer service revolution. On a scale from one to Sans, how many emotional breakdowns do you have in a day? Actually, a better question would be do you need a hug? Too bad, you're getting one anyways. Shh. Don't fight it. Let it all out, BP.

“What?  Someone came running for me?  This has gotta be some kinda joke, right?”

“In times like these, I have to play it cool.  I’ve been called a cool cat.  Once.  In a dream.  During the day.  A daydream.”

“Shit, I’m rambling, I’m totally blowing this.”

“Emotional break-downs?  Little Buddy, my entire life is just one big emotional break-down!  I’m barely holding it together!  Take it from me; it’s easier not to have dreams!  Then you don’t have to worry about life cru–”

He pauses.  You’re hugging him.  He wasn’t expecting that.

Slowly… his arms lift to encircle you.  He’s vibrating with excitement.  

Oh wait.  He’s purring.

“Can…. Can we stay like this?”

TDBM Drabbles: The Confession of Father Emery

Who hears a priest’s confession?  (100 words)


I am sorry, Jean.  I am sorry that I could not give you the answer you so desperately want.  Sorry that our Church does not recognize the miracle of second chances, of love reborn.  Is not love a gift from God?

I said you should ask for guidance, that the right answer would come.  But what is the right answer?  Church doctrine is clear; the heart is tumultuous.  I chose a lifetime of obedience and celibacy, but my heart remembers another life, of joy and passion and whispered dreams.  The right choice, yes, but the wrong life.  

Forgive me, Jean.  

pellistudies  asked:

What is like being a student in Oxford University? How is the university and what are some interesting things to know about? Oxford Uni is the university of my dreams and I would really like to learn more about it, especially from someone who is studying there!

Hello Pelagia! Thanks for the kind message. 

You can see a bit more about what life as a student at Oxford is like on my Instagram - I often post on my ‘stories’ about what I’m doing in the day. https://www.instagram.com Excuse the advertising, but I’d really appreciate it if more people followed me there too! 

To be brief, I think that it’s really difficult to characterise one’s university experience in a way that makes it representative - I think everyone’s university experience varies so massively, especially at Oxford. This is because the university is made up of different colleges, and doing a certain subject makes a real difference to your day-to-day life and experiences.

That said, I can tell you what I’ve enjoyed about it, and what I’ve found difficult - because university is hard work! 

To start with the more difficult things:

  • People in Oxford often refer to the ‘bubble’: the ‘enclosed’ or isolating feeling that living as a student as part of the university can provide. It can mean that you get really stuck in the university/studying mindset, and forget that there are other things which are also important. It shouldn’t be all work!
  • Moving away from home and having to discover and build new support networks can also be difficult, especially when you’re trying to keep up with the pressures of a large workload. (An essay a week, sometimes more, or lots of lab time if you’re a scientist, for example.) It makes looking after yourself really difficult!
  • Because there are lots of different colleges which make up the university, the quality of living arrangements and their cost can vary quite a bit!
  • Having confidence in your abilities can also be hard, especially in an environment where everyone is ‘supposed’ to be or is used to being considered ‘the best’ at what they do. 

That said, this last point can easily be made into something way more positive:

  • I’ve really enjoyed being surrounded by academically motivated people who like talking to me about our mutually favourite subject - books! It means you can really bounce ideas off one another and have a good chat - which, in the long run, can only make your work better. 
  • Some people don’t like the social life at Oxford, but I’ve found it suits me fine - I like going to the pub (rather than clubbing, say), and like the support that a college provides, outside of your subject group. 
  • For me, as a UK student, Oxford made the most financial sense, as it can afford to offer students extra grants on top of their student loans - for me, this meant that I did not have to work in order to afford to go, and could focus on my academic work. When I did do the odd temporary job (as a tour guide, or in a temporary office), I could save that money for holidays or spend it on socialising and clothes.
  • I’ve got to make so many amazing friends, and have really learned how to research and enjoy my subject.

I’ve really enjoyed my time at uni, and I hope this blog brings it (realistically) across!

Any more questions, do let me know and I’ll try my best.

For more pictures of Oxford and my life as a student, see my #studygram: https://www.instagram.com/_ellenbrewster/

snakecozies  asked:

So, how'd you and the king meet?

“Over a thousand years ago, my home island was ruled by a corrupt leader. After getting rid of him, I led a few of the other residents of the island to a better place. Some where we could start a new life and forget our horrid past. We landed in a place that was just being built. We decided to stay and aid in the buiding of the new kingdom. I ended up meeting Jerdana, one of the founders and became friends with her. Then of course, I came across my dear sweet Altador. Apparently, Jerdana told him about me and my island/people. Altador came up to me one day while I was helping with the building of the kingdom, and we started talking. We both shared the same dream of having a world with no corrupt rulers, where people would be happy.” -Nera

So a while ago @mailroomorder & @slayediest & I all exchanged Best of Glee playlists. I have since downloaded every song Glee ever performed, and therefore my list has changed a little (okay, a lot). I no longer have a Best of Glee (well, I do, but it’s huge), I now have Best of Seasons playlists. In case anyone cares, here they are! 

Keep reading

I remember coming home from my 1989 tour show. I was really impressed but also sad cause I really wanted to meet her. Fast forward to almost 3 years later- I got a DM from Taylor Nation saying they want me at the secret event. Never in my WILDEST DREAMS have I imagined I would be one of the lucky people who got an invitation. I know I couldn’t attend but Taylor Nation promised me they won’t forget about me and I trust them with my life. Never give up on your dreams guys!

This Distance

Oh, how did we grow to be so distant?

After being so incredible close?

An old computer, a crappy game.

Your jokes, my giggles.

Your eyes unbelievably focused,

And mine unbelievably distracted.

As I breathed in every bit of your perfection,

Every flaw you think you possessed, 

Completely unseen by me as you played your game.

One iPod, two sets of earphones.

How we built forts and played husband and wife.

How we listened to Bon Iver and talked about life.

Our big dreams. Our big plans.

How you wanted to be in the army.

How you said you would gladly take a bullet for me.

Rescue me.

How you laughed when I said  I wanted to be a mom.

Childish of us, I presume.

If only I had known,

What time would do to us.

Ten years ago,

It didn’t seem so difficult.

But now, its breaking every bit of me.

That twinkle in your eyes,

When you shared something exciting.

That honest tear,

When you shared something terrible,

Is still etched in my brain,

Like it all happened yesterday.

Oh, how did we grow to be so distant?

You had become shy and repelling.

Now instead of Bon Iver, you listen to punk rock.

Now instead of fantasizing about being in the army, you just want to get out of school.

You enjoy taking in the smoke that fogs up your thoughts.

Enjoy chugging alcohol to drown you sorrows.

Enjoy taking a sniff or two that blocks away the world.

Now instead of that twinkle, you have darkness in your eyes.

How did we grow these differences?

I know changes are good.

Changes are natural.

But is it worth over losing someone who wished you wouldn’t change?

Is it worth it over losing all those perfect childhood memories?

I can see that everything is fading away from your mind.

The world has suddenly become oblivious to you,

And as much as it hurts to say this,

That world includes me too.

A.V (https://theurbanbibliophile.tumblr.com)

“My mom doesn’t believe in love. I think she stopped after my dad painted her soft skin with the harsh colors of blue and purple one too many times. Or maybe it was after the nights he came home smelling of cheap perfume she’d never wear. Or no, I bet she stopped when he picked their son as the canvas for his unwarranted anger. Growing up, she’d tell me that she’d pray God would make her heart like stone, like the rocks that the sea beats against over and over; she craved their inability to feel. She claims her prayers were answered, but sometimes, when she sees old couples walking hand in hand still very much in love, she turns to me with a sad smile and reveals that she always thought that’d be her and him and I have to look away. That smile, it’s her achilles heel; it tells of her shattered dreams and whispers softly of her broken heart.

My mom doesn’t believe in love. As soon as I could understand the concept she drilled it into my head that there was no such thing. She thought it was a waste of time, sneered at those who tried to say it was one of the things worth living for. Unnecessary, dangerous was how she described it. She said she’d be damned if I fell into its trap and ruined my life for a boy that would leave me broken.

Now I don’t know how to tell her that I feel the things she warned against. I dont know how to tell her that my heart jumps when I look into his eyes or press my lips to his. I don’t know how to tell her that I fell for a boy with plain brown eyes and a smile that reminds me of the sun. I don’t know how to tell her that I gave him my heart and now he has the power to ruin me.

She’s going to be so disappointed.”

- n.g //

Black & Gold

you came into my life and quieted my mind. the moment i met you the nightmares stopped. the monsters that used to haunt my dreams were quickly replaced by visions of your chocolate eyes. it was like my mind knew you would keep me safe before i did.

i fell in love too fast for this to be anything but fate// 4am

so maybe, i needed to lose you
maybe i had to cry myself to sleep
every night for months after you
left to realize that my tears
weren’t going to change your mind
weren’t going to bring you back

maybe you won’t come back
maybe i’ll never see you again
and we won’t grow old together
and i won’t get to look at your smile
and think that i got so lucky
because in the midst of a war
i found love

but that’s okay
one day i’ll be someone’s wife
someone’s mom
maybe i’ll still name my son after you
but i’ll live my life knowing
i gave him a name that will make waves
a name people will move oceans for
fight wars for
live their lives for

you would have died for me
but you wouldn’t have lived for me
i wish that it was all a dream but i
know that you wanted someone like
her more than you wanted someone like
me and that’s just something i have to live with

—  a love (i think) i had to lose pt. 1
Fears Bill Skarsgård x Reader

Requester: atliefloresdaprimavera

Prompt: Reader is Bills gf, and she’s a famous book author and she’s terrified of clowns. They both support each other and are each others biggest fans so when he tells her he got the role she swallows her fear (he knows about her phobia) and helped him prepare for the role, but she didn’t want to go to visit on set; but the kids are her fans and she went to visit them one day later he tells on interviews he was scared for their relationship because of the role.

Warning: None 

Originally posted by deathtown

Originally posted by carlaconce

You hummed as you wrote on the computer trying to figure out what to write for your new book. You at the moment we’re having the worst kind of thing an author can go through—writers block. You had tried to start a new book but it just ended up falling apart before it could even take off.

Even the best authors such as Stephen King and J.K Rowling had writers block. According to most you were considered one of those truly best selling authors but you didn’t really think of yourself as one of the best even though that was how you met your boyfriend the Bill Skarsgård.

He was one of your biggest fans and you were of him and then one day during a book signing you met and it was pretty much love at first sight. You looked up from your computer at the tv show currently playing on the TV, Supernatural. You were on the episode with Sam and the clown.

Your heart raced incredibly fast when you saw the clown and had to look back down at the computer to avoid watching. You were terrified, TERRIFIED of clowns. When you were little your older brother and his friends thought it would be a good idea to fill the cellar full of antique life size clown dolls both made for Halloween (aka motion activated) and just for decoration.

And no, they didn’t just leave you in there for a few minutes and then just let you out they left you in there all night. You had to go to therapy for 2 years just to get over not suddenly shrieking at the top of your lungs for several minutes when you saw a clown on the tv.

Even if it was a fun colorful clown with painted dimples and mouth you still had a bad breakdown. You continued to stare at your screen and try to figure out how to even start the story.

Once upon a time?

Once upon a dream? (Reference!)

So a man walks into a bar…?

You groaned and slumped down tapping your bottom lip in thought. Several minutes had passed and you still didn’t write anything down. Your prayers were sort of answered when Bill came in.

“Hey!” He called from across the condo.

“Hey honey! How was your day?” You called.

“Amazing. You won’t believe what role I got.” He replied walking into the living room.

“Ooh is it popular?” You asked picking up your mug of coffee.

“Yeah you know that movie IT? I’m playing Pennywise.”

You instantly choked on your drink coughing and hacking and placing the mug back on the coffee table to avoid dropping or spilling it. Bill rushed over gently patting your back as you wheezed and felt the rest of the coffee go down.

“What’s wrong babe?” He asked.


Bill remembered your extreme clown fear and frowned, “I know your afraid of clowns so that’s why I came to you before I could accept.”

“Uh…yeah, I’m perfectly fine about it. Just don’t think about coming home dressed as a clown unless you want me to beat you to death with a bat.” You warned.

He smiled and kissed your head before saying, “Thanks baby. I love you.”

“Love you too.” You sighed.

He walked off and you continued to stare at the blinking cursor.

So far the IT remake had been in production for a month now and Bill was doing a pretty good job making sure to not act like Pennywise when he arrives home. The first time he did slip up was with his creepy laugh.

You both were putting the dishes away and talking when he did the Pennywise laugh and your glass slipped and shattered onto the counter. Bill snapped his head towards you and saw you were staring at him wide eyed and paralyzed like there was a clown right behind him.

“Sorry I…”

“No, no it’s fine. I’m fine.” You said before walking off to get the duster.
Ever since then he’s been extra careful not to act or talk like his character.

3 months into production he had finally been able to meet the Losers kids. He talked to them when he was out of costume and when he mentioned you all their eyes lit up in a split second.

“Your dating (Name) (Last Name)???” Jaeden (aka Bill) asked.

“Yeah you know her?” Bill said.

“I love her book Deathly Dreams.” Sophia (Beverly) said her eyes twinkling. All their eyes were as they shared what books they loved the most.

“Can you please bring her down here? My life would be complete if I got her autograph and got to talk to her.” Wyatt (Stan) pleaded.

“Pleeeaaase?” All the Losers nearly begged making puppy eyes.

Bill laughed knowing he was out matched against the seven kids (both in and out of character) and calmly said, “Alright, alright. I’ll try to get her down here.”

They cheered and Bill frowned hoping you’d be up for it. Maybe if he just tried to avoid you in costume like he did with the kids you’d be fine.


Later that night he bit his lip as he came home to find you were sitting in front of your computer typing your book.

“Hey sweetie.” He greeted kissing your head.

“Hey honey.” You replied picking your head up for a lip kiss instead.

He eagerly did and sat down next to you gently rubbing your shoulders making you look at him concerned.

“What?” Bill asked.

“Are you okay?” You asked.

“No your just looking tense.” He replied.

“Well how did filming go today?” You asked turning your head to continue to type.

“Good. I uh…talked to the kids…and they’re actually big fans of you.”

“Really?” You asked snapping your head towards him.

“Yeah. They were fangirling over you.”

“Awww that’s so sweet.” You giggled.

“Well…um…they also wanted to see you.”

Your smile faded slowly realizing why he was doing that. He wanted you to come onto the set to see the kids but…he would be in his character and…oh no.

“I mean you don’t have to we can just-”

“N-No it’s fine, I’ll go. I mean I kind of always wanted to see a movie behind the scenes with my own eyes. Maybe it’ll help me with this stupid book.” You said.



“You sure?”

“Bill, I’ll be fine.” You assured him.

“Alright.” He sighed.

The next day you went in with him and got to meet the director Andy who was also a big fan of your books. He lead you over to where the children were for makeup and as soon as you walked in they recognized you and nearly tackled you in a hug fangirling.

“Oh my gosh your (Name) (Last Name)!” Jack (Eddie) squealed.

“Yes I am.” You smiled feeling like you were floating in space.

A famous horror movie director and 7 soon-to-be famous kids loved your books?

Who knew?!

You took selfies with them, signed their books, talked to them, until you needed to use the bathroom. Good news was you were in a warehouse so you didn’t have to do your business in the woods or in a porta potty.

Bad news was you were lost trying to find your way back from the bathroom.

You were sure you had gone too far deep into the warehouse and now were wandering around the creepy place looking everywhere. You couldn’t find anyone to ask where you were so you were alone, becoming scared, and confused.


You sighed as you continued to wander your footsteps echoing. You heard the sound of laughter and shuddered remembering that laugh. A clown’s laugh. It sounded so familiar to the one over a decade and a half ago when you were in the cellar. Your heart was racing as you tried to get away from the source of the laughs.

Fear was overtaking your mind as you hurried to find your way out looking left and right. The echoes only seemed to be getting closer but you couldn’t tell if it was you  or the thing releasing the laughter going closer.

You finally came into a room and your blood ran ice cold and your heart seemed to stop dead. Standing there was a clown. Your brain was so filled with fear that it didn’t recognize that it was Bill.

If anyone saw him really unless they knew they wouldn’t be able to recognize him underneath all the makeup. You surely didn’t. When the clown turned to face you your skin turned paper white and your breath was trapped in your throat.

“(Name)?” Bill said in his real voice.

He started walking towards you and you took several steps back before running.

“(Name)!” Bill called.

He watched as you ran as fast as you could which was faster than him.

“(Name)!” He called.

“Leave me alone!” You screamed.

You ran into a closet and slammed the door shut hyperventilating. You ran your fingers through your hair and curled up in the corner feeling incredibly dizzy and sick.

“(Name)? (Name) please, where are you?” He asked.

You weren’t able to reply back gasping too hard. It hurt to breathe. You heard the knock on the door and you shuddered, “(Name)? You in here?”

“Bill I’m so scared.” You sobbed.

“(Name), it’s just me. Okay. I’m dressed as Pennywise but I’m not going to hurt you. Okay?”


“Can I come in?” He asked.


“(Name), I need a yes or a no…”

You took a deep breath before firmly replying, “Yes.”

The door opened and you squeaked and curled in on yourself. Despite this Bill walked over to you and knelt down in front of you.

“(Name), please don’t be scared. It’s me Bill.”

You slowly opened your eyes but you could still only see the clown. Your heart was pounding so fast your body had told you to get up and run but Bill was quicker and pulled you to his chest in a hug. You frantically panicked nearly hyperventilating as you tried to get away.

“(Name), it’s just me. It’s just me.” He whispered comfortingly.

He took off his silk glove and reached up to his eye before taking off one of the yellow contact lenses revealing his actual blue-green ones. You gradually relaxed and leaned onto his chest.

Under all that latex and makeup you could still smell his cologne letting you know it was indeed him. You wrapped his arms tightly around him taking slow breaths to calm yourself down.

“You okay now?” He asked after a few minutes.

You nodded and he smiled and nuzzled your forehead since he’d smear his lipstick.

“You actually helped me get over my fear of clowns.” You said softly.

He smiled and leaned down to kiss you. When he pulled away he couldn’t help but smile noticing your lips were tainted a light red. Bill placed his eye contact back on and you shuddered but otherwise didn’t run away.

“I love you.” Pennywise said softly.

“I love you too.” You giggled, “And your little clown nose too.”

“Yeah I brought my girlfriend who is like terrified of clowns to the set to ya know meet the kids and, um, she ended up getting lost and found me when I was deep in character as the clown and…yeah I scared her really badly. I thought she was going to break up with me but she didn’t…. I have the best girlfriend ever…”

Epilogue: I really liked this prompt idea cuz I’m terrified of clowns and like Bill is equal parts sexy and scary. Idk that’s just me. Thanx for reading! :3!

postcards to Marinette