i dont want too say nothing

tELL PEOPLE HOW YOU FEEL BEFORE ITS TOO LATE I AM BEGGING YOU. UNSAID FEELINGS ARE THE FUCKIN WORST AND THEY WILL KILL YOU, COMPLETELY EAT YOU UP INSIDE AND MAKE YOU ROT AWAY. YOU GOTTA TELL PEOPLE HOW YOU FEEL, RIGHT NOW, RIGHT WHEN IT HAPPENS. TELL THEM YOU LOVE THEM, TELL THEM YOU WANNA MAKE THEM HAPPY, TELL THEM YOU MISS THEM, TELL THEM YOU DONT LIKE HOW THEY TREAT YOU, TELL THEM YOU FEEL SAD AND NEED HELP. PEOPLE WANT TO HEAR WHAT YOU SAY EVEN IF IT HURTS A LITTLE AT FIRST. HONESTY IS REAL AND BEAUTIFUL AND FEELINGS THAT ARE SAID AND ACKNOWLEDGED EVEN IF THEYRE UNREQUITED ARE FUCKING RAW AND BEAUTIFUL AND HEY, AT LEAST YOU GOT IT OFF YOUR CHEST. SO PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BE HONEST WITH HOW YOU FEEL. LIFE IS FAR TOO SHORT TO HIDE BEHIND THE FEAR OF SOMEONE BEING MAD OR NOT FEELING THE SAME WAY. I PROMISE YOU. LIFE IS NOTHING WITHOUT THE SMALL RISKS OF SAYING HOW YOU FEEL. SO GO DO IT. SAY IT. I PROMISE ITLL BE WORTH IT. YOULL SEE.

what they say: you’re using your mental illness as an excuse 

what they mean: i care more about the thing you couldn’t do than your mental health 

what they say: try yoga/a healthy diet/just being happy/etc. 

what they mean: i dont know what mental illnesses are or how they affect people 

what they say: youre overreacting 

what they mean: my microscopic brain cannot comprehend that people feel, think and act differently, especially when they have mental illnesses making them act/feel/think a certain way 

what they say: you just want attention 

what they mean: i dont understand that humans need attention and affection to survive, that wanting attention is nothing bad, and that just bc i noticed doesnt mean you actually wanted me to notice

batshizzmizz  asked:

Hi Leslie! I'm a game design major and after seeing some of my art in class, a classmate of mine asked for me to draw him in some cartoon style. I told him that I don't do that kind of thing for free, so he agreed to pay me. I took the request, but after a bit, I realized that I know NOTHING about taking commissions. I don't know how much to charge, if I should send progress updates or anything really. So that brings me to ask: do you have any tips or insight on doing commissions? Thank you!

OKIE DOKIE

1.) Figuring how much to charge is p hard. I heard there are websites that help you do it. All I can say is make sure it’s never less than the minimum wage. Here in CA I think min wage is $10.50/hr. so I won’t go under that. Technically I’ll spend up to 2-3 hrs per icon so I should be charging up to $30 haha but ech. JUST YKNOW. Dont undercharge! 

2.) Make them pay UPFRONT. Don’t work first and then have them pay! You can get scammed like that really how stupid!! If the person who is commissioning you doesnt want to pay upfront don’t take the commission. They can find someone else then.

OR you can have them pay half up front, do a sketch and send them that, and once they like the sketch they pay the other half and then you finish. But yeah I rather go with full payment up front cuz I refuse to work for free lmao.

3.) I, personally, love sending progress sketches! So that if they dont like something about the picture they can tell me as soon as possible! Nothing sucks more than finishing a long commission AND THEN they ask you to change something they dont like.

“No one could ever be that big of a jackass, Leslie!” UM YES THEY CAN haha trust me. So its best to send people multiple updates if you can afford to do so!

I like to send then a rough sketch WIP. If they like it I’ll do the lineart and send them that too. Once they approve the lineart I finish the coloring! The end!

4.) Communication is VERY important! Try to keep your commissioner updated often! If you dont talk to them for a while they’ll think you abandoned them and their commission. If you need a vacation or hiatus or whatever let them know! 

5.) REQUIRE VISUAL REFERENCES. unless of course it’s a custom adoptable or something. Nothing sucks more when someone is like “can u draw my oc they have short brown hair and blue eyes thanks :)” LIKE NO THANKS 

Not having visual references makes things incredibly hard! If they have no references then it’s considered a custom adoptable (you design a character for them) and that is usually more expensive than normal commissions! CUZ YOURE DESIGNING A CHARACTER FOR THEM WOWIE yeah 

6.) Be upfront about how long it’ll take you to finish the commission! If you think it’ll take you a week tell em! A month? Be honest! Dont say youll have it done in 2 days when you know youll be extremely busy or whatever haha like I said, COMMUNICATION IS IMPORTANTE! 

TREAT YOUR COMMISSIONER THE WAY YOU WOULD WANT TO BE TREATED IF YOU WERE IN THEIR SHOES!

7.) If the commissioner is rude, too impatient, overall an unpleasant person it’s okay to drop them. Give them a refund and let it go, you HAVE that right. Don’t put yourself in a position you dont want to be in. If they cant be professional you can leave. If you give them a full refund you owe them nothing more. Sometimes people are assholes so don’t work with them. 

THATS ALL I CAN COME UP WITH RIGHT NOW. HOPE SOMETHING STICKS WITH YOU!! GOOD LUCK YOU’LL DO GREAT!! 

Originally posted by kurooscoffee

anonymous asked:

I know you said eren doesn't love mikasa but the whole "I'll wrap that scarf around you as much you want" thing really bothers me :/ I read the manga too I just hope nothing happens after if they manage to bring peace to humanity, I dont want them together

Hi,

First of all, don’t let that statement bother you one bit, that was not Eren’s way of declaring love or saying “ l love you” back, that was him reassuring Mikasa and himself that this was not the end, that he was not gonna die there without achieving his dream

If you watched the scene again you would notice that Mikasa actually leaned in to kiss Eren, it wasn’t as obvious in the manga but now we know it’s true, so why didn’t he kiss her? If he loved her romantically why would he refuse to do that knowing they were on the verge of death?

What he did was pushing her away almost knocking her off ( I’m not gonna use any gifs since they’re not mine), his eyes widened when he realized what she was trying to attempt by leaning very close, he was aware of her actions and yet he refused to give her what she wanted because it was not what he wanted, that was not a very romantic thing to do

So for me him saying “I’ll wrap that scarf around you as much as you want” was his way of apologizing about not feeling the same way about her and a promise that he will always be there for her & as I said a way to reassure himself that they’re gonna get through this

That being said, their relationship after chapter 50 didn’t change at all, well for Eren at least (I’m talking about his feelings), he was still as oblivious as ever

He actually made a lesbian girl blush without even trying and above all he had no freaking idea why was Mikasa mad, he didn’t know she was jealous (ffs she confessed her love to you not so long ago) because he didn’t care 

You would think that after chapter 50 their relationship would improve but no, this is Eren we’re talking about here, and what he told Mikasa that day was a promise anyone would make to a close friend even he himself seemed to forget 

Notice the difference between Eren’s and Jean’s behavior around Mikasa for more proof 

He didn’t even understand what Jean meant, srsly how can someone be so oblivious? That should be illegal 

So don’t worry about ere///mika being canon or anything like that, this series is not focused on romance and I’m sure it will always stay that way 

Unknown struggle (Simon Request)

(Emotional topic some readers may find distressing)
“No Simon fuck off!” You squeal, speeding round the landing of the sidemen house you now lived in to get away from your boyfriend of over a year.
“Come on answer!” He laughs, his longer limbs meaning he catches up with you instantly and grabs you from behind.
“I’m not answering” You shake your head, gripping onto his hands as he lifts you up.
“Oh seriously” He scoffs, “Out of Josh, JJ, Vik, Ethan, Harry and Tobi, who would you punch?”
“They’re my friends. I can’t answer that” You comment.
“Its JJ isn’t it?” He tilts his head, turning you to face him.
“Yeah but Im not sure why” You laugh.
“Can you two keep it down?” Vik yawns, walking out of his room since he’d been nocturnally sleeping as usual.
“Sorry Vik” You reply, turning round to face him with Simon wrapping his arms around you.
“Ughh you two are so sickeningly sweet” He grumbles, rubbing his eyes and heading downstairs.
“Right, you need to get on with editing” You mention to your boyfriend.
“Noooo” He whines, “Can’t we just spend the day together?”
“You still need to catch up before you leave for Boston and you told me, if you sidetracked, I had to sort you out” You remind him, “So, go on, edit”
“I’m also leaving you whilst I go to Boston to technically I should spend more time with you as well” He points out.
“Edit. And then we’ll see” You glare at him and he reluctantly heads over to his desk.
After a while, you’re propped up against the headboard of the bed with your laptop on your legs when Simon turns around to talk to you.
“I have an idea” He spins round in his chair excitedly.
“And what would that be Mr Minter?” You ask, closing the lid of your laptop and turning to look at him.
“I want to meet your parents” He states simply.
You widen your eyes slightly as you look at him.
“I mean, we’ve been dating for over a year now, you’ve met my folks, I’ve met your brother and your sisters” He explains, “and if its okay with you, I want to meet Mr and Mrs (y/l/n)”
You pause for a second, “Okay, I’ll take you tomorrow if you’d like”
“Sounds perfect!” He grins, jumping onto the bed, “For now, how does Netflix sound?”
~~~Time Skip~~~
You didn’t sleep much last night. You were anxiously thinking of all the possible ways Simon could react today. And you were still thinking about it now.
“Babe how smartly should I dress today?” Simon asks, going through his wardrobe with a towel around his waist and wet hair on his head from just getting out of the shower.
“I’m sure you’ll be fine wearing whatever babe” You respond, tugging on a pair of jeans.
“How about this?” He asks, holding up the shirt he wore to the premiere of laid in America.
“Babe you don’t need to put in so much effort,” You chuckle lightly.
“I don’t know, I want them to like me” He sighs.
“Wear whatever you’re comfortable in” You smile, kissing his cheek.
You change into a burgundy adidas T-shirt and yeezys whilst he goes for his white T-shirt, plaid shirt open over the top and black jeans.
“We’re heading out” Simon calls into the house to make the guys aware.
“Ooh it’s your big moment” JJ laughs, “Don’t fuck up”
“Shut up Jide” Simon scoffs, lacing his fingers with yours as you lead him to your car.
The pair of you are soon on the way with GSAP playing on the aux and Simon seeming to become more and more nervous. You felt it too. Just not in the same way. He was scared of what questions they would ask. How he’d answer. What they would think of him. Whether they’d like him. You were scared of his response.
“We’re here” You comment as you pull up at the side of the road, “Well, its just down here,”
On the way, you’d stopped to pick up some flowers which Simon thought was a brilliant gesture.
“Oh okay” He nods, getting out and holding your hand as you take him down the road you had walked so many times.
Every time you went down this past, your hands shook slightly and your breaths came out with a shiver. You seemed to only hear the blood in your brain and your eyes only became focused on the route you would take to get there.
“Everything okay babygirl?” Simon frowns.
“Yeah, just here,” You gesture and open the large squeaky gate.
“(Y/n)” He begins, his voice light.
You stay silent and lead him down the long main path before turning to the correct part and winding your way cautiously through to get to your destination.
And you were there. With your parents in front of you. Their gravestone. Amongst all of these graves, they seemed to get terrifyingly further to the back each time you came. You and your siblings always kept the grave in the best state possible- you made sure all of the leaves were cleared away and there was always flowers in water pots or small cards scattered across the area.
As you crouched down to clear away some of the stones and moss that had built over the soil, you noticed that Simon still stood in shock beside you.
“Babe i-” He starts but his words fall flat.
“I wasn’t really sure how I’d tell you” You admit quietly.
“No come on don’t be ridiculous” He shakes his head, “I wouldn’t even know where to start”
You nod and make sure the flowers you bought are laid out perfectly.
“So, how did it happen?” Simon croaks, crouching beside you.
“I was fourteen. We went on a family holiday to Cornwall and on the way back, a drunk driver was on the wrong side of the road. They died instantly” You explain, tears in your eyes, “I remember waking up and I was screaming at them to get up because I had my baby brother in my arms and he wouldn’t stop crying and I didn’t know what to do. And then everything else was a blur”
Simon stays silent, only moving to rest an arm around you.
“We all got to the hospital and they sat me and my sisters down and they told us that they’d both died. I yelled at them so much. I was the oldest so I felt like it was my responsibility. And I screamed because it was their fault and they should’ve done something and they didn’t and-” You stop as your tears threaten to fall, “I remember we went to my Nan’s house that night and I stayed in my brothers room because he wouldn’t fall asleep the whole night and I just held him and its the first, last and only time I ever cried in front of him. Ever since then I’ve just had to be the parent”
“Babe I don’t even know how to begin” He says, “I can’t even imagine how difficult it was for you"
“Every single weekend I come here just to make sure they’re okay” You sigh, “You know, when we were kids they told us that we could still talk to Mum and Dad if we felt like we needed to. I guess I never really stopped”
“What would you say to them?”
“I’d tell them all about school, then uni, my job, you and the guys” You list, brushing your hand over the cold stone. It still sent a chill down your arm.
“You know there’s nothing wrong with that” He reassures you, “And if its okay with you, maybe I could come up to some of these trips. Nothing has to change, we can just talk like you usually would. I’ll try not to swear or be too loud or say anything I shouldn’t do, I promise”
You smile and look down at the ground. It was strange having someone to share this with. Being the oldest, you’d always made sure that the others were okay. You never confided in them or any of your family or the woman they sent every week to ‘help’. You kept it bottled up. You just trusted Simon enough now that you wanted him to be aware.
“You dont have to be alone in this anymore babe” He smiles, brushing the hair from your face.
“Okay” You whisper, your tears too strong to allow you to speak any louder.
(Sorry for no imagine yesterday guys! I had food poisoning and spent the entire day on the couch!😟 I’ll try to get out 2 today hopefully x)

In honor of Women’s Day, I present to you:

“Kayla’s Guide to Getting Career Things You Might Not Deserve Way Faster and Better Than You Ever Thought You Could Get Them.”

1. Don’t tell yourself you’re unqualified. The only person you should let tell you you’re unqualified is the person/industry you’re trying to break into. Don’t self sabotage. Your loudest cheerleader should be yourself. ALWAYS. Its not vain, its a survival method.

2. Never underestimate the value of unpaid work. And I don’t mean internships. Going to someone who pays people to do a thing you know how to do, and telling them you’ll do it for free for a set amount of time in exchange for a recommendation/foot in the door, works like almost every time. Example: “hey I’ll do this writing project if you’ll give me a recommendation for x company where you have connections.”

3. Fuck a font door, find a back window. You don’t always have to follow the perfect steps to your dream career. Stay alert and find creative ways to get your foot in the door. Be the janitor who befriends the CEO and gets a job. Be the student who befriends a professor and gets published with them as an undergrad. Walk into city hall and start asking people for shit. Just be chaotic ok.

4. Charisma gets you so far, its almost sickening. If you can charm someone important into giving you an opportunity– then bust your ass when the opportunity is given to you– you’ve earned their trust for at least long enough for them to give you an opportunity that can change the trajectory of your career.

5. Be Ready. Most successful people talk about “i just was in the right place at the right time doing the right thing” which sounds random, but its NOT. Get yourself as prepared as you can possibly be and go stand in the right place and then wait for the right time.

6. Get used to talking to people you don’t know from a hole in the wall. Talking to important people you don’t know costs you nothing. Send out random ass emails to people in your industry of choice asking them for advice. Like go up to random ass people and ask them if they enjoy their job. Talk to your uber driver about what they did before they decided to drive uber. If you feel like you’re not good at it, force yourself. It gets easier, I promise.

7. IF YOU HAVE SOMETHING THAT WORKS USE IT. Capitalism is too callous to be sitting out here being “too good” for using your looks to get things. I’m sorry but on this beautiful March 8th women’s day, I’m gonna say that if people treat you nice when you look pretty, make yourself look pretty before you ask important people for things. Let nothing stop you, ok. And this goes for men too, buy that nice ass suit, get out there and get what you want. If you dont have that face on fleek that’s okay too. Just bump up your charisma, you too can get things.

8. Have multiple people look at your work before sending it to the person that matters. If you have 10 people you know who are qualified to review something and number 1 is the person you want to submit to, don’t send it to them all at once. Contact number 10 and send your work to them, then take the #10 edited work and send it to #9 and then take the #9 and #10 edited work and send it to #8 and so on and so forth. By the time your work gets to #3 and #2 it will be at a stage of quality that #1 will be blindsided by receiving from a novice.

9. Take time to rest. You can’t be at your best when you’re psychologically damaged by exhaustion. I’m going to say this again. TAKE TIME TO REST. YOUR MENTAL HEALTH IS IMPORTANT. Especially between the ages of 17 and 25, guys that’s the dangerzone for activating a lot of lifelong mental illnesses. Take care of yourself. Be nice to yourself.

10. Get people who are important to your career emotionally invested in your success. After you’ve surrounded yourself with people who can improve your career, make them care. Share your successes with them and thank them when they help you. Make them root for you. Having important people rooting for you while you’re rooting for yourself is the kind of support that gives you the fuel to submit that 60th query letter, that 100th job application, go on that 50th audition.

sungjae on peniel's strength and weakness:

‪peniel hyung is really a good person, he really is too kind, always cheerful and pure. he also takes care of us well. when he came back from america this time, he bought me A LOT of candies and told me"its yours!“ (in english😂) i was very touched…. because he really is a hyung thats too kind, theres nothing i can badmouth when it comes to him.. but something i want to say? because you are so kind, people will take advantages of you :/ hyung, watch your back, really, remember our promise - dont trust others too easily ‬

anonymous asked:

aaahh you're making me want to watch black sails. what's it about?

forget what you saw. run. run while you still can.

Inertia [EruRi]

Modern AU. Sometimes they go out and pretend they don’t know each other. Gently nudges this at @zedsdead1001 Thank you for having such lovely headcanons and for being such a sweetheart. Someone help them, they’re so dorky.  Rated M I guess? For dirty dancing… Ao3




He slammed the taxi door and stood on the curb, pausing to let a thrill slither up his spine, prickling at the back of his neck.  Throbbing bass spilled out the open door alongside flickering lights that caused the shadows cast by the bouncers to dance across the sidewalk.  Two women stumbled out of the club, the shorter of the two pausing to toss her head back and laugh, unselfconscious and bright, bubbling over the noise of the club.  The other woman spun her in a circle, dipping to mouth along her neck, trailing a hand down her back, winding the other up into her hair.  The little blonde’s fluttering laugh slid low and Levi shivered, pushed his way into the rolling noise of the club that reverberated until it was palpable.  His lips pulled back from his teeth, wolfish.  He liked the chase.

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

hi..i was wondering if you could help me answer something? one of my favorite artists said not to tag their art as kin/id...but im not actually sure what that means and i dont want to ever possibly violate what they want so could you maybe tell me what it means so i dont accidentally offend them somehow? i just don;t know what they're asking people not to do so i don't want to do it

((I sometimes put that on my art too, but only my ocs. I don’t actually have a 100% perfect grasp on the concept though. 

Don’t quote me on this, but from my understanding it’s assuming the identity of another person/thing etc. Someone saying they are kin to a character are saying that they are in some way that character. 

Artists want to avoid people tagging their art as kin/id because they feel like their art is being taken away from them, especially ocs. The art isn’t made for a person to tag as kin. I have nothing against the kin community or whatever, they arent hurting anyone. 

I’d really appreciate it if someone gave a good explanation of kin bc i dont understand it fully))

anonymous asked:

sana being sick and yousef taking care of her 24/7 until the moment he asks her parents if he can stay with her over night having a 10 minutes long monologue about how he will respect her boundaries and after he ends totally exhausted her mom is like "yousef you spend here more time than at home, if this means you will make sana tea with honey all night long and i can sleep, of course you can stay" and yousef is the happiest person alive and they never seen a person who's so happy making tea

ahhhhhhh omg!!! he would so talk to her parents during more than 10 minutes and everytime they start talking he just goes “wait, i know its not a right thing but i swear i only want to stay to look after her and to see if she needs something and to make her tea, nothing will happen i respect her so much and you too” and he would be so worried about their reaction but he just wants to stay and look after her like he is so worried about her because he hates seeing her sick and when her parents say “you can stay dont worry” he literally lights up!!! and lmao sana and him would spend the night just talking and he would be like “you need to sleep” and she is just “im okay and i spent all day sleeping right now i just want to talk to you” and basically they would spend the night talking and drinking tea 

send me cute yousana / the balloon squad / the bakkoush siblings headcanons !!

OnS chapter 58

!Personal opinion!

I really really dont like what Kagami is doing with Mika.
There I go thinking Mika finally warmed up to everyone else or at least understood how important they are to Yuu and is willing to listen and what does he do? “I have to protect Yuu-chan so I have to kill this guy (Guren) he loves even if it makes him hate me, it’s the best for him” without listening to what Yuu wants and what everyone else thinks. And when the others side with Guren he threatens them too. “He’s at fault we have to live in a world like this blabla” and when Yuu says “You dont know Guren Mika” still nothing.

Thanatos Night Vol. 4 Seth: Animate Tokuten (Translation)

I felt like translating something cute so here’s Seth’s “Fallen Angel Night” (/)u(\) This was a preorder bonus for those who bought Seth’s CD from animate.

(Translation under the cut - Do not use/repost without permission)

Keep reading

I know that you may hate me for this but I have been thinking about it for a while now. I have to say I am really not a fan of Valentina. I dont want to rain on everyone’s parade but nothing about her has me hooked and interested. Yes, she is talented and unique in her own way, but I think that people put her on a pedestal too much (just like fans do with other fan favourites).

anonymous asked:

don't read this if you haven't seen ep 8 yet. what are your thoughts on nick & june in the ep? i'm unsure. it's not as bad as it could've been, & i'm still convinced that there's more of nick's story to be revealed or that he'll develop in some way. i don't think offred and nick are over by any means. i understand nick's inner conflict entirely - does he risk himself & offred, or does he say fuck it because at least it gives them hope & something to live for? i really think he can't decide. +

+ however his lack of communication w/ offred and almost messing her about isn’t fair and i’m starting to get angry at him for it. she doesn’t deserve that treatment, and it sucks when it’s coming from the only positive thing in her life rn. he needs to get his shit together and make a decision or at least voice his thoughts to her so she can understand. i’d love to know your thoughts :)

alright. i literally just finished watching the episode (i kept pausing it far too many times because it was just so disturbing) and i still have to gather my thoughts about it but i’ll share what i have now

ep 8 spoilers ahead!

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I dont wanna like make a scene about this or anything cause it could absolutely mean nothing but harry on facebook has his account so it uses gender neutral pronouns like usually it says "Harry has changed his profile picture" but it says 'their profile picture' and honestly i dont want to assume anything but thatd be kind of cool if he's super not into identifying as anything my non binary ass would cry

i don’t know too much about facebook since i haven’t used it in years but that’s really lovely and honestly the thought of it has my nonbinary ass choking up too

anonymous asked:

They're bringing back castiel SOMEHOW, because he's signed for season 13. Mark isn't. I will honestly stop watching if they do away with Mark. I'm pretty sure that if they dont somehow fix this, Season 13 is gonna be their last.

Maybe he is too, but they don’t want to give it away?!

And the fact that Misha signed already for s13 says nothing… He could be a hallucination in Dean’s head the whole season and that’d be it…

Shawn Mendes-Drowning *Mercy Video*

Request: someone write an imagine inspired by the Mercy video with Shawn and you trapped in the car pls oh my god #MercyVideoNow
- @dear-diary-no7
Warning: Mentions of drowning/death
Summary: Basically based of Shawn’s video he released today. GO CHECK IT OUT ON YOUTUBE!!!! Hope you love it darlings x
~ ~ ~

I can feel the side of my forehead resting on a cold slick surface as I feel the motion of being shaken to my senses.

My eyes slowly pry open and I look out the windshield from my belted spot in the passenger seat.
“Y/N!” Shawn says in desperation, cupping my face and having me look to him.
“Look into my eyes hun” he says, noticing the gash I obtained from hitting just under my temple on the door. But all I could focus on was how fast the water was filling the car from us being underwater and I started to hyperventilate.
“Look at me” Shawn says again, wanting me to focus on him instead of succumbing to fear.
“We’re going to be okay” he said and brushed a strand of hair from my eye with his thumb that rested on my cheekbone.
“We-we’re-the truck…the truck hit us!” I say quickly as it registers through my mind what had happened.
My eyes flicker around at the blue water that engulfed the car, some fish swam around us, not even noting our disturbance to their home.
Tears brim my eyes and fall at the thought of drowning.
“Y/N breathe! Breathe Y/N” Shawn encourages and wipes away some falling tears as his hazel eyes continue to stare into mine.
I inhale deeply a few times, slowly regaining composure as Shawn did it with me.
I clean up my tears but cant help but have a few more fall.
“I need you to remain calm and work with me, okay” Shawn told me seriously and took my hand.
I look to his hand and then back with a nod and a sniffle.
“We’re gonna get ot of here. I promise” He assured.
~ ~ ~

Shawn grasped the door handle on his side and bashed his shoulder against it repeatedly, trying to push it open.
But it wouldnt budge due to the water pressure pushing against the car.

I sat sideways on my seat and used both heels to pound into the glass window on my side.
Getting not even crack in the plexiglass.

“Im going to try the sunroof” Shawn said and reached up for the mini sliding plastic door, which he easily reached due to his height advantage.

He was unable to remove the glass.

He hit his palm against the glass in frustration of us getting no where with time running out.
With the way the water was filling up the car, we had maybe 2-3 minutes of oxygen left.

He goes back to the door.
He hits the door and splashes water around that is now to our chests.
“Oh my god” I say with a voice crack.

I now do the same as Shawn, knowing that I didnt stand a chance with busting it open, but was hoping for a miracle.

My skin tightens and gets goosebumps with the water getting colder as it slowly consumed us.

Shawn’s well groomed hair is getting soaked and turning into a mop of curls.
My hair is already soaked and floating within the water around my shoulders.
Water droplets from our splashing movements against the doors, dew our faces.

Shawn extends a hand to the roof as he puts his legs against the door and uses his strength against it.
“Im going to get you out of here, even if it’s the last thing I do” he promised me in grunts as he forced himself against the vehicle again.

“Shawn” I gasp with my face towards the roof of the car, sitting on my knees on the seat because of how short I am.
“Shawn!” I gasp again and then spit out water that had flown in my mouth by accident.
He turns to me, hands braced to the roof and hair totally soaked as he now needs his face slightly tilted up to the roof for air.
“Shawn, I love you” I tell him in breaths.
“Dont say that” he says, “This is not going to be it”.
“Maybe, but I just wanted you to hear it one last time for sure” I reply softly, quickly feeling my lungs burning.
I feel his hand search for mine under the water, and he finds it, intertwining our fingers.
“I love you too, y/n. To the ends of the Earth” he responded softly.
The water fills up past my ears and quickly creeps up.
“Shawn!-” I began but the chilly water swallows us before anything else comes out.

Everything is silent.
Nothing stops. Not even time.
People didnt even know we were down here. They would drive on the bridge over us.
The delivery truck that T-boned us must not have thought we went over the barriers and into the sea.
Our families and friends and people that knew us, would never guess we were down here…suffocating…drowning.
But we were.

My eyes start to close and body start to shut down as a defense mechanism from my heart having to work over time to provide oxygen to my organs for life.
Yet, Shawn keeps fighting.
He frees his hand from mine and his fists thump the window repeatedly and he screams underwater, releasing precious oxygen bubbles.

But he gives a final elbow to the glass and it shatters.
The glass shards swarm around us.
Shawn turns to me and grabs my forearm, pulling my limp body towards him so he could hook an arm around my waist.
When he has a sure grip, he swims out the broken window while holding me.

He swims through the murky blue water and shoots to the surface with a gasp for air.
He looks to me in his arms and sees that I need assistance.
So he swims at a set pace to the shore, where he lies me on my back on the grass and starts performing CPR.
“Come on, y/n. Come on” he begged and pushed down onto my chest repeatedly and looked to my pale wet face before attaching his warm lips to my cold ones.

30 compressions and 2 breaths.
He did that twice before I spat up water that snuck into my lungs.
He holds the side of my head and has his forehead against mine as I slightly sit up and place my hands over his as I take quick deep breaths and cough from the sting of the air flooding my lungs once again.

“I promised I’d get you out” he said and breathed with me.